(First Edition Posted May, 2007)

Walk in Lies

Some Good People

Mica limps down the alley with everything they have slung over his shoulder. He finds the money in his pocket and thinks bitterly about the way they robbed him. He needs to clean the memory of the four men off his body but it is too early to go to the pool. Losing track of Finn frightens him. He has lost the boy and he cannot think of the best place to look for him.

“Mica, wait!”

Mica turns around and there is Finn running toward him. Mica drops their packs and then Finn has jumped into his arms. “Are you okay?” The boy-hustlers ask simultaneously. Mica kisses Finn on the lips because he is so relieved to see the boy. Finn wraps his legs and arms around Mica and kisses back. They just stand there holding each other.

“It was a bad date.” Mica explains. “Where did you go, Finn? You were there, I remember. I woke up and you were gone.”

“I got a date.”

“What the fuck! You went out on your own?” Mica is furious with Finn. “Four guys worked me over, Finn. You …” Mica cannot go on.

“I guessed. We needed money. I had to get you some money.”

“They paid me. Not enough, but they paid me.”

“I got paid too!”

When they reach the street Mica leads Finn across to a diner. It isn’t open this early in the morning so they sit with their backs against the door and check the street for danger.

Mica’s body rebels against the idea of food, but he has to order or Finn will be worried. The eggs get pushed around his plate and he drinks hot coffee. An older woman watches them sympathetically from behind the counter. She has seen too many boys and girls come in early, wet and tired. Their faces keep changing as they drift into the neighborhood and then mysteriously disappear. The older boy’s hand shakes as he lifts his cup to his bruised lips.

“Eat the eggs, kid. You’ll feel better.” The teenager glances at her with a guilty look and pushes egg and toast into his mouth like an obedient son. She refills his cup in silence. He doesn’t look at her. He is gazing out into the wet street. The smaller companion eats his breakfast in silence.

“Do you want to pay?” He looks back at her blankly then seems to come back from somewhere and reaches for his things. “You don’t have to leave yet kid, the place is empty. I just want to clear your tab.” She knows he has money. He pulls a crumpled $100 bill from his pants and hands it to her.

She has a grandson his age and she doesn’t want to think about how the boy earned the money. She smiles sadly as she watches the boy carefully organize the change into a neat pile; each bill face up and he smoothes them flat. The small companion reaches into a pocket and pulls out some fifties. Finn hands them to the older boy and Mica adds them to the pile. Mica puts it into his wallet carefully. His face drifts back to the street as the younger boy talks to him.

She is busy with a new customer when he catches her attention. “What time is it?”

“It’s 7:00 kid.” She tops up both their cups so he knows she isn’t expecting them to leave yet. The pair sit conversing quietly and they haven’t given her any attitude.

“Would you make a phone call for me?” He has her attention. He looks almost innocent as he stares up at her.

“What’s your name kid?”

“Cai …” he pauses briefly before continuing “Mica. I want you to call my sister.” She knows there must be problems at home. There are always problems or the kids wouldn’t be here.

“What’s her name and what’s the message?” She hands him her pen and he carefully writes her name and a phone number down.

“Tell her I need to see her. Tell her to come to the library downtown.” He is pleading with his eyes. Mica is out of ideas and he needs help. Ruth is a straw in the wind but he hopes she will talk to him. The waitress nods at him and goes back to her work. He watches her as she finally reaches for the telephone. It is early and his sister should still be at home. He can’t resist crossing to the counter to listen as she starts to talk.

“May I speak to Ruth?” there is a long pause. “It’s about work.” She shrugs at the boy. She doesn’t know if the sister works. He nods his head vigorously so she knows she said the right thing. “So it’s not my problem if she gets fired for screwing up.” There is a pause of silence as the woman waits for his sister.

She cocks her head as if uncertain and motions Mica closer to the phone and he listens quickly to the voice of his mother asking what she wants. His eyes widen with alarm and he shakes his head violently at the waitress. “I said I have to talk to Ruth. Is she there?”

There is another long pause before the waitress resumes talking. “Are you free to talk?” Then she hands the phone to Mica. It is his sister and he quickly arranges a meeting at the library after she gets off work. He hands the phone to the waitress who listens briefly then hangs up the receiver.

“Was that your dad in the background?” Mica nods his head. “Sounds like a right bastard.” Mica is inclined to agree. He returns to Finn and the coffee. People are starting to look at the two scruffy boys as the café fills up. Mica knows he needs to gather Finn and their bags and move on. He stops and thanks the waitress as he leaves. There are still some good people.

The library is quiet. Mica knows the library staff and they know him. Desperate for a place to stay, he reads books. One older man embarrasses him because he knows Mica and Finn seem to be living in the library during the day. Mica will not check the books out, but he is reading one that catches his interest. When he looks for it on the shelf the man appears and hands it to him. “Someone wanted it, but I knew you hadn’t finished it. Give it to me when you leave and I will keep it for you.” Mica doesn’t know what to say.

Mica and Finn have been at the library most of the afternoon. He feels better now that he has washed the filth of his night away at the pool. His things are clean after a morning of staring at a washer and dryer tossing what is left of their lives around in circles. Even the thin sleeping bag is clean. He knows the little bag next to his feet has nothing in it to protect Finn from the Tricks through the harsh months to come.

Mica likes to read. Finn can see him slouched in a chair with a book he is not paying attention to. Mica explained about the phone call in the diner while they watched the dirty clothes twist around. Mica is obviously worried, and that makes Finn nervous. Finn is fine without family. Finn is worried that this is when Mica decides he will abandon him like he did the day they learned Alea and Cain were shot in the park.

Finn likes the library because he can plug in his Nintendo and charge it up. He tries to play one of his old games, but the coming meeting between Mica and his sister is distracting him. Finn feels like he has caused this new development. Mica was so upset that Finn went on a date. At the pool, Mica looked him over carefully, fussing over his body. Finn kept assuring his partner that The Firefighter did not hurt him.

Mica is sitting where he can see when his sister Ruth enters the library. He doesn’t know what she can do, but he knows he is short on choices. From his seat on the edge of the balcony he can see the main entrance below, and if he turns the other way, Finn stares at him over his forgotten Nintendo.

Ruth is not alone. She has brought his grandmother and Mica’s hopes fade. She is a stranger to him but his father speaks of Grandma Jo as if she is an unyielding fortress of faith that even Henry Laar cannot live up to. Mica can’t remember the last time he saw her. He knows she is stern and unbending because his father has assured Mica that he often disappoints her with his wickedness.

Mica always stumbles harmlessly into wickedness. Mica’s hair is too long for his grandmother. Mica’s music would upset her and she would be shocked by the girlie posters on his wall. If she knew what he had done for Cain and Alea, or how he had survived on the streets she would turn away. But Ruth has come and he needs to see her.

Mica looks a lonely figure up against the balcony railing and the two women come toward him quickly. Mica almost runs down the stairs from the balcony. Ruth takes in his ragged appearance and folds him in her arms for a long hug. Ruth feels good to him. They have spent little time with each other. They have taken each other’s presence for granted.

Ruth holds him at arm’s length to see his face and then brushes the hair out of his eyes. “Are you okay squirt?” Mica fights the tears and shrugs, not willing to voice his real feelings. “I brought Grandma Jo.” Joanne is a spare woman about Mica’s height and he looks at her warily. She has tears in her eyes too and this makes Mica feel less intimidated by her. “Grandma says you can come home with her if you would like.” Mica glances back and forth at the two women and bites his lip.

“What about mom and dad?” Ruth shakes her head. The door is still closed to him. He looks at his grandmother, “thank you grandma, I appreciate it, but I’m not alone.” He doesn’t know what he is getting into, he is very clear about what he wants to get out of, and Finn stands watching all of this on the library stairs. Finn must remain by his side.

“What do you mean?” Joanne asks.

“Finn,” Mica is looking around for the boy as if he might have slipped away during this family reunion. Finn on the stair tree. He always seems to be on a tread, a witness to Mica’s life. This is Finn-in-hiding, Fin church-mouse in the corner. Mica goes to Finn and puts a hand possessively around his shoulder. “Grandma, Ruth, this is Finn. Finn and I stay together.”

Finn feels the closeness of Mica by his side. A little pressure on his shoulder brings him closer. The Firefighter was wrong about Mica. No way is Mica like his brother, Cain. Mica would never be like family. They were bitches to each other until Finn found a better word. He simply blinks at the old woman, waiting to see what will happen next.

“Perhaps we should call social services.” Ruth suggests, eyeing the scruffy boy like he is a flea-bitten alley cat her brother has picked up. She knows her Grandma Jo should not be burdened with two boys.

“He tried that when his family left him behind. Finn stays with me.”

“Good, that’s settled.” Joanne states firmly. “Do you boys have anything to get?” Finn vanishes up the stairs to retrieve their things. Joanne is touched by the way her grandson clutches Finn to his side when the boy bounds back down the stairs. She notices the book in Finn’s hand. Joanne takes it from her grandson’s companion

“Are you reading this?”

“That’s Mica’s book.” Finn shrugs. She hands it to Mica and tells him he should check it out.

At the circulation desk Joanne stands beside him while he fumbles for his worn library card. He hasn’t checked a book out for years and they wish to update his card. When it comes to an address and phone number he hesitates and Joanne firmly gives them her place. Outside on the sidewalk Ruth explains that she has to leave. Things are tight for her and she still needs to live at home. She promises to come by when she can for a visit.

“Can you bring some of my things?” Mica has only the clothes on his back and an extra change. Ruth shakes her head and reluctantly tells him that everything has gone to GoodWill. Mica thinks of the leather jacket Edan bought him and the new watch. The door is truly closed to him. Grandma Jo reminds him they can be replaced.

“Someone phoned for you yesterday Mica. He sounded anxious to talk to you.”

Mica asks Ruth if she took a name. She shakes her head and tells him that their father snatched the phone away from her and told the boy Mica didn’t live with them anymore. Brother and sister hug again and Mica whispers his thanks to her. It feels good to know there is still someone who cares. On the bus ride to his grandmother’s apartment they talk very little. Joanne says nothing and Mica is still shy. Finn sits close against him, uncertain about this change in his life.

Mica’s grandmother Joanne lives in an apartment. It is old and there is little space. It sits two floors up, but his grandmother seems to have no difficulty climbing the stairs. The smaller bedroom has no bed and she apologizes to the boys for the cramped space full of odds and ends.

“No grandma, this is great. We can sleep on the floor. I have a bag.” She has no idea how good this looks to him. Finn will find safety here. They will both be comfortable. Mica wants her to know that he will behave. “I promise I won’t be a problem to you. We’ll leave if you want us to.” He will do anything he can to avoid this. “I promise I won’t disappoint you. Finn won’t be a problem either, promise.”

She is touched by his words and sees his fear. He seems so sweet she can’t imagine how her son Henry could push him out. She remembered how upset she had been when her son told her he had kicked Mica out of the house. It has been almost two weeks and she has prayed for the young boy every night. She looked for him on the street as she moved about the city. She was overjoyed when Ruth phoned her from work.

Joanne tries to reassure the thin boy and impulsively brushes his hair out of his face. The little boy beside him seems lost. Finn won’t join the hug, but his lips flicker when she smiles at him. There is another story here she does not know yet.

“Do you want me to cut my hair?” Mica asks.

“Why? Your hair is nice.” Actually she thinks the split ends need a trim and the boy could use some conditioner. The pair of ragamuffins follow her out to the small living room and sit uncomfortably while she putsters about in the kitchen.

She has left work early to meet him. They both have a great deal to learn about each other. “Maybe you could come down tomorrow and I’ll give it a trim. I can trim your hair too Finn.”

“I’m growing my hair out till it is Mica’s length.” The boy manages to say.

“I’m sure long hair will look very nice on you.” Joanne assures the thin boy. He is another one who needs new clothes. Finn nods his head and watches her curiously for a while. Mica turned on the television and the boys started watching while they both accustom themselves to sharing the small space.

Later, before she goes to bed, she sits for a moment to talk with her grandson. “Mica, I have to ask you something and I need you to be honest with me.” She puts a hand on his knee to reassure him. “Don’t worry about what I think either. I’m not going to ask you to leave.” Mica looks at her like a frightened animal. “Were you working the streets?”

Mica is afraid to tell her the truth. He knows he shouldn’t try to hide this from her. Finally he drops his eyes and looks at his feet before nodding his head. He can’t look at her. “Well I think we should probably take you to a doctor and make sure that you are alright.” She gives him a kiss on the forehead before she heads to her bedroom. She has embarrassed him with her question.

“Grandma,” she turns to look at him and he says, “I won’t do it again.”

Joanne forces a smile and tells Mica not to worry; he will always be welcome in her home. He sits and reads his book in the comfortable silence of the dark apartment while Finn sits with his bare feet tucked beneath Mica’s hip.

Rain starts to fall and Mica is drawn to the balcony off the small living room. Joanne is woken by the sound of the door opening and, seeing the two boys are not in the little bedroom, worries that they have left the apartment to go back to the streets. She sees Finn bent over the glowing screen of his video game and Mica on the balcony watching the rain come down. Mica doesn’t turn when she comes to stand beside him. He seems absorbed by the rain and the sounds of the city street. “I’m sorry I woke you.”

“I thought you went out.” I thought you went back to the streets. The streets are scary, but they are a freedom of sorts. Joanne understands that very well. She is chilled by the cold night air but she needs to know he is alright.

“There is nothing I want out there grandma. Finn was going to die out there.” It was a cold thing for a fifteen-year old to say. Boys like Mica come to church lunches she serves and she is one of the few people who might understand what they have seen or done. She looks again at his profile and thinks, Not you Mica, not anymore if I can help it. She shakes off her own dark memories and links her arm with his.

When she leaves him to his rain, Finn comes out to join him. It is delicious to watch the rain from under a dry awning. “Is everything still good?” Finn asks Mica.

“I think it will be fine.”

The boys go back to the small room that they will share together for as long as this opportunity lasts. Finn remembers the old camper behind the Sykes’ house. Finn was happy there. Mica was so worried about Finn dating a Trick. He is snuggled up against Mica’s back, but Finn needs to know he is still safe, still accepted by his all-important bitch. Mica let's Finn push him down on the carpet and Mica does not object when Finn removes his underwear. Finn pushes himself into Mica like a hungry baby nuzzling up to its mother.

Finn wants to tell Mica how grateful he is that Mica stayed with him. Finn’s mother looked so defeated as she watched Child services lead her youngest son away. It’s for the best, she said. But Finn still wonders, best for who? Vikki watched Finn as he was led away. Finn read the hatred in her eyes. Finn was escaping into the unknown. She was left to suffer with her father on her own.

Mica turned his back on Vikki. That is what a Sykes does to another Sykes. That was what Mica did the day he learned Alea and Cain were dead. Finn was not going to wait around Child Protection. He had to find his bitch.

Finn’s-bitch did not walk away from Finn the second time. This is for the best, Finn assures himself. Mica responds to the hunger of his small boner. The whores are so silent with each other. Finn presses his lips against Mica’s shoulder so his soft mews do not reach the woman sleeping on the other side of the wall. Mica’s hand reaches around to pat a quivering flank when Finn orgasms. When Finn is reassured, The boy drifts off on Mica’s chest like a toddler safe in his father’s arms.