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This story has a total of 10k words in 5 parts. The entire story has been written and it will all be posted.
This is an authentic tale. There will be plenty of explicit and descriptive sex but this story is actually a genuine love affair between opposites. The set and setting is NYC 1984. The protagonist is a straight appearing student and his unintended relationship with a androgynous Goth.
Absolutely East 4th Street. copyrighted by Larkin jet2larkin [at] gmail [dot] com
Part 9: Uncertainties
Eventually the two of us began to roam the city together. We were so dissimilar in stature and appearance that no one took us for being a couple. I guess they figured that we were two students or just odd acquaintances.
One Sunday I got the bright Idea to visit Roosevelt Island. Sunday is always a good day to tour because everyone goes out of town on the weekends. Rage seemed agreeable so we started out. Roosevelt Island is a thin island set in the east river between Manhattan and Queens. It was long and sort of looks like a miniature Manhattan. At one end, there are still ruins of old small pox hospitals and insane asylums from the last century. I imagined that it would be fun exploring them. The only way to get out to the island from the Manhattan side is on a cable car tramway. It costs a just a token. It rides high above the East River right next to the 59th street Bridge. It is one of those genuine urban sights. I was right; it was a slow day because we had the whole car to our selves. The car shoved off out in the air above the water.
I was scanning the cityscape when Rage came up close to me. He started pulling down my fly. I must have recoiled but he was not to be stopped.
He looked up at me and said, "Daniel, will you fuckin relax. Let me suck your dick, come on, see if you can get off before we get to the other side. Get your balls out and work on it."
He had my cock and was tugging on it, then he got on his knees and started sucking me. I was apprehensive and kept looking right and left and then behind me.
He looked at me again and said, "Come on, don't be such a pussy, get into it. No one is going to see us and if they do it's their good luck."
I realized that he was right but I was still nervous. I had to close my eyes to try to make it happen.
I got it up and it was good and
I was beginning to get there when I heard him softly say,
"Ok, put it away, we are coming in and there are people on the platform."
I turned and organized myself and then the two of us walked off the tram like nothing happened.
Rage was laughing, "That was so fun, I like that! I just wish I had a mouth full when I walked past that big fat lady on the platform."
Once out of the car and off the platform, I relaxed and began to appreciate the fun and mischievous excitement Rage was trying to relay to me. We spent the afternoon finding places to hide and have quick and desperate, sex cutting it off just before I came so we could do it all over again in some other place. It ended up being a memorable day.
When we got back home and
settled in, I said, "Why would you want to suck my dick in the cable car
when we could have so much more fun here in bed together?"
He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know?"
Still trying to figure out his reasoning I said, "Well, here we can do anything. We can really get into it and on the cable car, all you could do is suck dick and it was interrupted."
"Yeah, but it was fun, wasn't it?"
I answered. "Yeah you're right, it was fun, but I was still afraid that we were going to get caught. Doing shit like that is way hard to explain your way out of."
He turned and looked at me as if I was stupid. "Danny, don't you want sex to be unpredictable and maybe even dangerous? Remember when we first met? You didn't know for sure if we were going fuck and when it happened it was so much fun. It was not being sure that made it so intense and so exciting. It makes my life an adventure like being in a story in a book."
He was lecturing me. "I mean, like, everyday, do you look at the time and do you say to yourself, it's five o'clock, time to fuck Rage, six o'clock, time to mike dinner, seven, time to organize my bubble wrap? Then when you get a job, you do more and more stuff that everyone says you have to do and soon there is nothing of you left because you become part of someone else's giant machine. I don't want to be part of a machine. How I have sex is a lot of who I am and for me, it's more fun if it's a surprise. It has to be spontaneous, and it can be somewhere where I might get caught and if it is, it will definitely be exciting."
I made the mistake of thinking of him as being childlike and he comes up with street knowledge that puts all my book learning to shame.
He cuddled up next to me as if he was apologizing. "I don't like to have, "Time to suck dick." on a fucking schedule."
I realized that he was far from defenseless.
Rage went on. "You don't want fucking me to become something that becomes boring?.. because if it becomes boring, then sooner later, you will get so used to me and then you'll get tired of me and you will just throw me away like trash."
I looked into his face and said, "I would never ever do that."
It would occur to me only later that I had overlooked an ominous sub-text.
Part 10: Kick
I called Rage. "I'm uptown, doin stuff but I'll be there in about an hour."
Rage answered. "Ok, I got to get back upstairs, Yeah, we're gonna have company. Jacques is here and Kick is comin over. I figured we could buy Chinese. Could you stop by the Lucky Garden and double our usual?"
I said, "Ok, but I have to go home tonight. There's no way out of it."
Rage sounded disappointed. He had the tendency to lean on me financially but I loved him so much I didn't care. Actually spending what little money I had on him made me feel like a man. I carried the large bag of Chinese up the five flights of stairs. Rage quickly let me in.
"Kick is on her way over and then we can eat."
Rage was tidying, making up the day bed and putting stuff away.
The bathtub that sat in the middle of the main room, had a white porcelain cover that when it covered, the bath tub doubled as a kitchen counter. This is also common in New York tenement apartments.
I began to set out all the Chinese food when I saw him sitting in the corner. He was wore a black leather jacket and had on smart creased jeans. It was a shock to see him sitting there. He was balding and wore dark glasses. To me, his presences was fearsome and unfamiliar.
Rage said, "Oh, I almost forgot, that's Jacques. He's a real good friend of mine."
The man stayed almost motionless except for a barely perceptible nod of acknowledgment he gave me. He was way over thirty.
I was fine before, but he made me feel extremely uncomfortable.
I looked over at Rage and he pretended that he didn't notice my searching expression. There was a knock at the door.
When I opened it a boy as tall as me said, "You must be Danny, Rage told me all about you!"
He was wearing a turquoise
shirt and bright yellow pants. They were very tight and showed off a big piece
of meat packed sideways. I looked and quickly looked away. The impulsive
gesture was not lost on him (her).
He glided passed me into the apartment like he owned the place. He had shoulder length light brown hair and a rather large nose. He was cheerful and gregarious.
Rage met him and they both hugged each other and laughed out loud. I noticed that Kick had a pierced tongue.
He was proud of it and showed it off by sticking his tongue way out. "You like it? It's for suckin dick. I can't help myself, sometimes I get carried away!"
Rage couldn't contain himself and joined in the laughter.
Then Kick yelled, "Jacques!"
Kick ran over and sat his (her) butt down in Jacques' lap. They kissed and sort had a momentary make out session.
If I was nervous before, I was much worse now. I tried to concentrate on the paper plates and plastic flat ware. Jacques stood up and gathered himself to leave.
Rage said, "Aren't you going to eat anything?"
The tall man turned his mouth down slightly and shook his head, no. I considered him intimidating. He hugged and kissed Rage and walked out. Almost immediately Kick started up with silly chatter. Everyone got a plate of Chinese. I took a small portion because I knew I wouldn't be able to eat much. Kick sat on a small beanbag chair and perched his plate on top of his knees and ate noodles. For some reason, he reminded me of Big Bird.
Kick excitedly told a story. "So, there's this place on the Westside around Fourteenth Street and you'd never know it's even there. I mean like, it's just a black door with graffiti all over it. It's all locked up until around midnight and then...."
I looked at him wondering what happened then. He looked at me, then looked at Rage and then back at me.
He said, "Well, it's an after-hours bar but it is sort of a place where you can go to suck dick, you know and it is just full of men!"
He made a peculiar face approximating gratification and slowly dragged out the word, "Oouuch,"
For the first time I was apprehensive about this whole gay thing. I withdrew into myself and let Rage and Kick talk back and forth. I was thinking that I didn't want other people in on my love affair with Rage. I just wanted him and no one else in the world. I think Rage finally noticed my worried distance. He was not even five feet tall. He climbed into my arms to comfort me. We kissed and then he picked up his conversation with Kick.
He smiled and looked over at Kick. "Danny is the best."
I appreciated that Rage was trying to make me feel better. "He's a real man. He can do it so good and then do it again without stopping."
"Kick smiled, tilted his head and directed his comment to me, "Sounds interesting, what day do you have off?"
Both Kick and Rage laughed.
Over the course of the evening, Kick kept coming on to me and Rage pretended not to notice. I was flattered by Kick's attention but I couldn't warm up to him (her). All I could think of was how much I wanted to be alone with Rage. Finally Kick got up to go and my mood lifted.
After he left, I pulled Rage down on the bed with me. He was reluctant. After all I had been through and all I wanted was just to be with him and now everyone is gone and now he is rejecting me? He could visually see me going through changes. He sat down next to me and began to open my pants. I supposed he figured he had better do some disaster management.
He started sucking my cock.
In a hushed voice I said, "Rage let me fuck you."
Without taking his mouth off of my cock he shook his head no. I was perplexed.
When he took a break he said, "Come on, cum. You told me you have to go home tonight and I just don't feel like getting fucked right now."
He paused and then curtly said, "If that's okay with you?"
He lifted my balls out and stroked me in a way that only he could do.
"Come on Daniel, make it dirty. Decorate my face."
That was the sort of inspiration I needed to get me excited. Maybe it was my pent up frustrations or maybe I was even angry but degrading him sexually came to me easily.
We kissed and made up.
I didn't want to go home but I had promised my Dad I would. Once out on the street I took my time and contemplated the whole evening. I kept thinking about that guy, Jacques. What the story on him? I was afraid to even think about what the nature of his relationship with Rage was all about.
"Shit, I left my Id at Rage's"
I turned to go back. On the far end of the block is saw an unmistakable figure come out of the building. It was Rage. I went to call for him but he was met by Kick and they both got into a cab and quickly drove off. I looked at the time. It was 11:55p.m.
If I had to describe the emotion I felt seeing Rage climb into a taxi with Kick, it would be one word, Panic. I surely felt this way but I had no idea what to do about it. My mind raced. He and Kick had disappeared into the bowels of the city and the night. Probably to that place Kick talked about where guys go to suck dick. Why would Rage do this to me? He had to know that I was crazy about him and I would do almost anything for him. I looked around not knowing where to go. I looked at the trash that had accumulated in the gutter. I would give my life for him and he's goin off, not even to meet someone he likes better than me, but goin off to meet a fuckin stranger. He might get on his knees and look up at someone he don't even know and then suck his cock.
I had never felt this much torment in my life before. I thought about the whole evening leading up to me standing alone on the corner of East 4th Street. I had a pit in my stomach that wouldn't go away and it kept getting worse. This whole thing started when I saw that Pierre or Jacques or whatever the fuck his name was, sitting there in Rage's apartment. What was he doing there?
A wave of horror suddenly washed over me. Rage was making up the day bed when I arrived in the evening and I had seen him doing it when I left in the morning so it must mean that guy Jacques fucked him! My mind was spinning and I was getting sick to my stomach. It was a horrible vision. Rage being mounted from behind by this guy and he was looking at that guy the same way he looks at me.
And Kick, I hate him or her or whatever. He comes in and is telling Rage where he can go to suck lots of cock! Kick comes in and takes Rage away from me and delivers him into the hands of the pig people.
"Fuck you Kick!"
I kept thinking about it over
and over all night long until I got into an insane mania.
Rage didn't come home until later in the day. I know I looked like shit. I didn't sleep, I didn't change and I was in a state of serious depression.