Warning! This is a tale about men loving men. If you find this disturbing - click off. If it's unlawful for you to read this - click off. If you under age - good luck if you can get away with it.

This is not a story for getting your rocks off. Just thought I'd let you know so you won't waste your time if that's what your looking for.

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Billy's Story

Chapter 02

by JWSmith

My mom and dad were killed in an accident when I was four. The sheriff who was my dad's best friend took me to live with Tom. Tom's my uncle. Well, to get it straight, he's not related by blood. He is the son of my granddad's first wife and her first husband. She died leaving Tom for my grand dad to raise. Grand Dad then married my grand mom and they had my mom. Since my grandparents formally adopted Tom I guess the right expression is step uncle. Both of my grandparents died before I was born.

I had spent many an evening with Uncle John, the sheriff, playing on the living room floor while my parents watched. He wasn't just my dad's best friend, he was my best buddy, too. He had told me that so many times. He was a giant of a man. He wore a beard and looked kind of like Ulysses S. Grant. He had a heavy pelt on his chest. He was proud of it and always wore the top three buttons of his shirt unbuttoned.

I discovered his hairy chest before I could even walk. I loved to burrow into it and snuggle against him. Even though I was only four at the time, I can still remember Uncle John telling my daddy, "Yeah, Bill, this little man is going to grow up to be just like me." Years later I realized that he meant I was going to be a man lover, too. I've always wondered if my dad knew what he meant.

When he came to the house the night that my parents died, he was crying and that scared me. Big people just didn't cry in my little four-year-old world. They were big and strong. He gave me a big bear hug and sent me back to bed. I lay there wondering what was so terrible that it could make my big buddy cry.

He and Mrs. Carter, my baby sitter, talked in the kitchen for a while and then she came into my room and started taking all my clothes and toys and putting them in boxes. That really scared me. She told me the sheriff was going to take me to Uncle Tom's for a vacation. I didn't know what a vacation was and that was scary, too. I jumped out of my bed and ran into the kitchen, back into the big, strong, safe arms of my buddy.

He was sitting at the kitchen table looking awfully sad. I crawled up in his lap and he hugged me close. I burrowed my face into his hairy chest; that made me feel safe. He started talking to me, but his words suddenly turned into blubbering. I rubbed my little hand on his cheek.

"It's okay now, I will take care of you. I love you, Uncle John,."

He just cried more, and hugged me tighter to him. I started crying too and that seemed to make him stop. He rocked me on his lap until we had both settled down.

"What's a vacation, Uncle John?" I asked between hiccups.

He thought a minute.

"Well, that's where you go away somewhere nice to relax and have a good time."

"Am I going to Uncle Tom's to relax and have a good time? Am I?"

"No, Baby, you're going to go live with your Uncle Tom."

"But I like living with Mommy and Daddy."

"You can't do that any more, Billy. Heavenly Father took your mommy and daddy up to heaven to live with him."

"Why didn't I get to go with them?" I asked.

"Well, Sweetie, they thought you should grow up and go to school and learn a lot things before you go. And I think God wants you to stay here and take care of your Uncle Tom."

"Oh." I thought about that for a while. Uncle John continued to hold me. I was happy with his big arms around me. I snuggled into his hairy chest and thought about it all.

"Uncle John?"

"Hmm?"

"I don't know Uncle Tom very well. He always brings me presents. But he never gives me hugs like you do. Why can't I go live with you?"

"Well, Billy, I'd love for you to live with me, but I am always working and you need someone to be with you all the time. Tom loves you too, and I'm sure he will give you lots of hugs now that you're going to live with him."

"Will you still come see me?

"Of course I will, little man. You're my little buddy."

"Guess I better get dressed if we're going, huh?"

"That's my buddy, you go do that."

I slid to the floor and ran into my bedroom. Mrs. Carter had stripped it bare. She helped me find clothes to put on.

"I'm going to go live with my Uncle Tom, Miz Carter." I told her. "I'm not going on a vacation. I'm going to live with him now that the angel took Mommy and Daddy up to heaven." I told her with big solemn eyes while she tied my shoes. She gave me a hug and a kiss on my forehead.

"Bless you child. May the good Lord take care of you."

She then helped Uncle John load all my things into the black and white pickup that he always drove. He locked up the house and thanked Mrs. Carter for her help.

Uncle Tom lived on a ranch up in the mountains between Hillsboro and Silver City. It's a beautiful valley in southern New Mexico. There are Aspen groves mixed with pine trees on the mountainsides and in the spring the meadows are covered with flowers of all kinds. I soon became enchanted with this wonderful new world. And I quickly learned that Uncle Tom loved me. Maybe even more than Uncle John did.

The drive through the dark night was long. I fell asleep, curled up against Uncle John, my head resting on his leg, and his large comforting hand on my hip. When we got to the ranch I felt strange new arms lift me and hold me against a big warm body. I woke up enough to know that Uncle Tom was holding me. He gave me a kiss on the forehead and carried me into the house. He laid me in his big bed that smelled just like him and I drifted back to sleep.

At first when I awoke the next morning I was frightened. I couldn't move. I opened my eyes. There was a big hairy arm draped over my chest. I thought about last night and remembered that Uncle Tom had put me in his bed when Uncle John had brought me out to him. I wiggled a little bit. I could feel Uncle Tom's hairy chest up against my back, his breath in my hair, his hot body lying nearly on top of me, with a big heavy leg laying over my legs. Once I figured out where I was, I wasn't scared any more. I was safe and protected. I lay there a long time waiting for him to wake up. I needed to pee so badly that I finally lifted his arm, pulled my legs out from under his and slid off the bed. It was almost daybreak, it was dark in the house. I hadn't been upstairs before, so I started exploring and discovered a bathroom through the first door in the hallway.

When I finished I crawled back up onto the bed. I sat with my legs folded up, my elbows resting on my knees, my fists holding up my head. I studied my big uncle. The early morning light was beginning to brighten the room. He was a very nice to look at. He wore a big droopy mustache. He had lots of thick brown hair everywhere I could see. I liked the way the hair on his head was messed up and hanging in his face. I leaned forward and carefully brushed it back like Daddy would do mine when he sat on my bedside to kiss me goodnight. Tom woke up. He rolled onto his back and stretched and then scratched his hairy chest. Suddenly he turned his head and looked at me. He looked awfully sad at first and then he smiled and reached over and grabbed me. He pulled me up onto his chest and hugged me. I wrapped my arms around him. Burrowing my face into his fur and hugged him back. He rubbed his hand up and down my back, not saying anything. I felt so good, so secure. I lay there thinking about what was going to happen to me now. Finally, I broke the silence.

"Uncle Tom?"

"What, Billy?"

"Daddy and Mommy aren't going to come to see me now that they went up to heaven, are they?"

"No, Billy, God won't let them come back."

"Can we call them and talk to them on the phone?"

"They don't have phones up in heaven."

"They didn't even come tell me good-bye before they left."

"I'm sure they wanted to, Billy. But when God came to take them they didn't have time to go home and say good-bye to you."

"Why was God in such a hurry?"

"Well, I don't think it was God who was in a hurry. It was probably the angel he sent to get them. Angels have lots of work to do and I guess he forgot to let them say good-bye to you."

"Oh."

I lay there on Tom's chest being soothed by his big hands, thinking about what a big job God has, having to watch over all of us people. I could see how he might forget about a little boy like me. I'm sure that's what Uncle John was talking about; that's why I was there, to take care of my big beautiful uncle and to let him take care of me. By having us take care of each other, God didn't have to worry about maybe forgetting us. Tom interrupted my thoughts.

"You can talk to them in your prayers, Billy, they can hear you. And sometimes they can answer you in your dreams."

"Really?"

"Sure."

"Then tonight when I say my prayers I will tell them I miss them and I can say good bye, too."

"I'll say good-bye with you. Okay?"

"I love you, Uncle Tom."

"I love you, too, Billy. Now let's get up and milk the cows. I'll show you how to feed the chickens and you can help me feed the horses and the cows and the pig. Okay?"

"Yeah, that sounds like fun."

"Okay, get your clothes on while I go pee."

I jumped off the bed and found my clothes lying on a chair. Tom got out of bed and headed through a door I didn't see in the dark. I could hear him peeing so that had to be another bathroom. I got my shoes on, but I had to ask to have them tied. I always made knots that were hard to get loose.

I got to feed the chickens after I watched Uncle Tom milk the two cows. I thought it was really funny how he would squeeze the cow's titty and milk would squirt out. He pointed one at me and told me to open my mouth. He shot the hot milk right into my mouth. That was really funny. It splattered all over my face and ran down my chin and got the front of my shirt all wet.

After we got the chores all finished Uncle Tom made me a big stack of hot cakes with a fried egg on it with four slices of bacon. I love bacon, and my mom only ever let me have two slices. After we ate and cleaned all the dishes, Tom helped me carry all my stuff upstairs. My room was right across from his, and he helped me unpack every thing and find a place to put it all.

After we got it all put away, Uncle Tom said it was time to take a shower and put on clean clothes. He started undressing. I got my shirt off and undid my pants, pushing them down to my feet before I realized I hadn't taken my shoes off first. Tom had to come over and help me with them He then sat down and pulled his boots off and his Levi's. He didn't wear any underwear like my daddy. My mommy hated that and always made me wear them.

"I sure will be glad when I'm old enough to tie my own shoes" I told him. He laughed.

"I tell you what, as soon as we get showered and dressed, I'll teach you how to do it. Okay?"

"Yeah, that would be neat, Uncle Tom."

He helped me get the rest of my clothes off and then picked me up around my middle with one arm, holding me against his hip, my arms and legs dangling free. He carried me into the bathroom kicking and squealing with glee. He set me down and adjusted the water and stepped into the shower.

"Come on in, Billy, so I can close the door."

"I'm going to shower with you?" I asked.

"Sure, that way we will both be clean when we finish."

Well, that sounded logical to me. I scurried into the shower, and he closed the door.

"Mommy only let me bathe in the bathtub. She said that showers were for big people. Am I a big boy now, Uncle Tom?"

"You're my big boy now, Billy."

He took a washcloth and soaped it up well. He kneeled and started washing me all over, starting with my face and neck. He washed my arms and then my chest and back. He slid the washcloth between my legs and then washed each leg and foot. He then took my peepee and peeled the skin back and carefully washed all around the head. That made me shiver.

"It's very important to always keep real clean under your skin, Billy." He explained.

"I know, Uncle Tom, Mommy always did that with her fingers though."

He then shampooed my hair, and had me rinse off.

"Now it's my turn." He said, standing up. I stood and watched him wash himself all over just like he did me.

"You want to wash my back for me, Billy?" He offered me the washcloth and knelt with his back to me. I carefully and thoroughly washed his big broad back. It's strange that his back was the only place that didn't have a lot of hair. When I got down to his furry butt he stood up and took the washcloth and said he could wash the rest. I watched him clean his big peepee the same as he did mine.

"Someday when I grow up, I'm going to have a peepee as big as yours, Uncle Tom."

"You sure are, little buddy. And your going to be big and hairy just like your daddy and me."

I shivered with delight at the thought of having hair all over my body. It was neat showering with Tom. My daddy never bathed me and I only got baths in a tub of water not a grownup's shower.

After he got all rinsed off, he turned off the shower and grabbed a big towel. He dried me off and then with another towel he dried himself. He picked me up and sat me on the counter and combed my hair. He put toothpaste on my brush and handed it to me. I kneeled on the counter where I could look into the mirror and cleaned my teeth just like my mommy had taught me to do. I spit and rinsed. And then watched as he did the same.

As we were getting dressed, he asked me if I wanted to go riding on a horse. I love horses. I was really excited to do that. But first we had a lesson in tying my shoestrings. Uncle Tom sat me on his lap with my back against his chest. He reached around me and took the strings on one shoe and slowly showed me how to do it. I then took them and tried to copy what he did. After about four tries I made a complete bow. Boy, was I proud of myself.

We went out to the corral. Tom shook the bridle and his horse walked right up to him. I think the horse really loved my uncle. He led the horse out and put the blanket and saddle on it. He got up in the saddle and told me to climb up on the corral fence. He rode up behind me, reached out and grabbed me around the chest and sat me in front of him.

With his arm holding me securely we took off at a trot. That was really bouncy and it made my voice sound funny when I talked. We laughed a lot and really had a good time. I think that Uncle Tom really did like me and that he was just shy around my mommy and daddy. He hugged me tight against him.

"We going to be best buddies aren't we, Billy?"

I nodded my head vigorously and hugged his arm.

We rode all around the ranch. He showed me lots of cows and told me they were ours, mine and his together. I never owned anything like cows before. Uncle Tom explained that they had been my daddy's and his together and now they were all mine and his together.

We rode up to this big old squealing windmill that was next to a big round concrete water tank. There was an old bathtub sitting near that the cows drank out of. The tub had a ball thing floating in it that Uncle Tom explained to me how it kept the water level up with out letting it run over. He let me push it under so I could see the water run out.

"Want to go swimming Billy?"

"Yes, but I don't know how." I answered.

"Come on, get your clothes off and I will teach you."

We raced each other to see who could get theirclothes off the fastest. Uncle Tom won. He had a lot more practice than me. He had to untangle the knots in my shoelaces before I could get my pants off. I was really disgusted.

"That's okay, Billy. If you keep practicing you'll get the hang of it."

He picked me up and sat me on the edge of the six-foot high wall of the water tank. He climbed a ladder and walked over and sat down beside me.

"Okay, Billy, I'm going to swim around the tank and you watch how I move my arms and legs. And then I'll hold you and you try to do just like me."

He lifted his butt off the wall and slid into the water. He swam across the tank and back. He stood up and showed me how to cup my hands and move my arms, and then he held on to the edge and showed me how to keep my legs straight and kick them up and down.

"Want to try it?" He asked.

"Yes, it looks easy."

Uncle Tom lifted me off the wall and lowered me into the water.

"Alright Billy, I'm going to hold you up and you kick and move your arms just like I showed you."

With one his hands under my chest and the other under my belly I started kicking and furiously windmilling my arms.

"Stop. You look like that windmill. Remember how I did my arms. Try it again. Just your arms."

I did it again, and got it right.

"Okay, now kick your feet."

I kicked and moved my arms and suddenly I was swimming. Uncle Tom had lowered his hands and let me go. I realized I was moving away from him and stopped. I started to sink. Uncle Tom quickly grabbed me and lifted me up. He laughed as I sputtered and spit water.

"You did great, Billy. You were swimming by yourself."

"But you let go of me." I accused him.

"You can't swim if I just hold you. You were really swimming, Billy. Want to try it again?"

"Okay."

Uncle Tom again supported me as I flailed and kicked. And when he lowered his hands I was really swimming. He stayed right next to me and I swam right to the wall. I grabbed the edge, turned and grinned at him. He grabbed me and hugged me. He kissed me on the forehead.

"You're going to be a great swimmer, Billy. See if you can swim across to the other side."

He put me into position and I started swimming. I got to the middle of the tank and pooped out. Uncle Tom was there to keep me from sinking.

"That was great, Billy. Let's rest a minute and then I'll show you how to float."

I was holding onto his neck and suddenly I was lying on his chest as he lay back and paddled toward the edge. He lifted me and set me on the top of the wall. And then he pulled himself up and sat beside me.

"That was fun, Uncle Tom. I want to swim everyday until I can swim as good as you."

Uncle Tom taught me how to float on my back by barely moving my hands and feet. We floated around for a bit and then we had to get dressed and go back to the house for lunch. After lunch we had a short nap and then we worked in the vegetable garden for a while. We did the evening chores the same as that morning.

Uncle Tom fixed us a real good dinner of fried chicken and mashed potatoes. He made me eat all the peas he had put on my plate. When bedtime came Uncle Tom knelt beside the bed with me and encouraged me to tell my Mommy and Daddy goodbye and that I missed them. I told them to wait for me cause one of these days I was going to go join them. I told God that I was kind of mad that he wouldn't let them come say goodbye to me, but I would forgive him because he had so many people to look after. I thanked him for giving me to Uncle Tom. And I promised I would take care of him real good. When I finished I looked at Uncle Tom and he had tears in his eyes.

"I love you, Billy. You are the answer to my prayers. I always wanted a little boy all my own. And now I have you."

We crawled into bed. I gave him a big hug and kissed his cheek, and then I turned over and snuggled into his warm hairy chest and went right to sleep.

Continued.