Boy Meets Boy and Dog
Disclaimer: this is a story about two boys who engage in same sex activity if you live in an area where it is illegal to read about such topics stop now. Feel free to contact me and give me guidance this first story is a little short, the next ones will be longer. Email me at
Iluvd80z24@yahoo.com. Feel free to comment.
I sat on the edge of the seat, the pastor stood in full command of the crowd telling them the horrid of sin and how, those like me choose their selfish behavior over Christ. The familiar pit began in my stomach and i got that warm feeling accompanies the conviction of something that is wrong. Is it guilt i had always been taught it was the spirit of god telling us that something in our life was being addressed and we needed to pay attention my recent college experience taught that no matter how society felt about it you cant run from yourself, so i now recognized that pit in my stomach as an uneasiness of being called something other than a believer. He finished his exposition with the usual Pentecostal plea he spoke as a man that had a burning in his heart, i wonder if any of the other ministers on that platform even knew what it was like to feel the way i do. Isolated from church, family, and even those who claimed to be friend just because i "talked" or "walked" different the memories of high school flooded back and those old words "fag" resounded in my head. I gloomily sat back in my seat no longer interested in being spiritually connected, i resented these people and their fake attitudes and big hair and applied makeup. I realized the service was over and i was still sitting there in a daze. "Cayden". I looked up at my friend lost in my thoughts my friend Aeisha stared at me "lets go ".
Aeisha used to run track in high school she had, soft chocolate skin with long hair and almond eyes, nice full lips with a slim frame. We had been friends since high school and even closer friends since graduating from high school and she realized I didn't like girls. I smiled back at her sadly and said "yeah, lets go." as we walked out of the auditorium size sanctuary i felt self conscious as if everyone knew my secret and that they were ready with their bible thumping hands, to pray over me. I often thought that either people that looked at me in certain ways were able to tell about me and didn't approve or they were gay also. My friend Noah called this "Cayden's everyone's gay theory" this same question came up again..... Just as I wasn't walking where i was going this guy almost ran into me "ohhh sorry...." I looked into his light blue eyes and quickly turned away Aeisha looked at me and pulled me away. As I either ran or was being dragged out of church I am still not quite sure which one I kinda looked back and realized he was gone. I sighed and thought probably straight anyway.
As we got in Aeisha's light blue Acura rsx, she looked at me and said what was that all about back there. I looked at her blankly and said "huh." "Cayden, you seemed so sad and lost during service you normally are at least attempting to fit in at church." "I sighed and said am I that transparent, she was like um yeah. Even during collection when u walked down to the front i could tell some people were looking at you. My interest piqued a bit, ."really." "Yeah, you know you got that little walk, and you don't quit even in church." " i normally got offended when people talked about my walk but i let that pass. Instead this time i asked did any guys look? She laughed and said actually yeah a couple, they were in that same trance you were in after church, she laughed slowly and then louder hitting the wheel of the steering wheel. I guess there are others like you after all huh, even in church." I lol, and said, " guess so."
During the car ride home we joked about the preaching in the service and i suddenly got serious for a moment. "aeisha, how can god judge me for feeling a way when that's all I known as I went into my detail she just looked and listened as always. " if you have always known an felt a and believed a but what if you were suddenly told that a was wrong and you were supposed to feel b, you would say b what is b. As i explained this to her she looked and said "I know, I know, but you know life isn't black and white and neither is religion, remember that Christ himself came to love not the perfect or those with wonderful lives but those who were less desirable to the religious elite. I thought about this for a moment and suddenly grew quiet. We pulled into my apartment complex "talk to you later my mom says hello, she said. As she pulled off i looked into the sky and let the warm rays hit my tear stained face i always cried at church, I don't know if it was loneliness, sadness, guilt or all three, but i thought of what aeisha said and was comforted by that. I walked into my apartment and was greeted by my chocolate lab bailey, his enthusiasm to see me was almost human like, I looked at his little olive friendly eyes and smiled and dropped to me knees and hugged him. Again tears fell from my eyes and I realized it was the loneliness that made me feel the way i do. I took him for our usual walk and he as usual led the way. As the familiar ring tone of :glamorous life" sounded out I looked at my phone. The name will, showed in the flip screen i said hello, the familiar "hey Chile" greeted me on the other end. "What you doing." I said walking the dog, will jokingly said you taught that dog to fetch boys yet, I laughed and said "actually I'm working on it." he laughed and said "drinks tonight and the attire is pink your favorite color." we hung up and as I put the phone back in my pocket my neighbor on the other end of the complex came outside with his white Siberian husky, the husky had light blue eyes and my dog ran pulling me on the leash to the husky and the boy as the two dogs sniffed each other gingerly at first and then romped off and frolicked together. As the owner and me stood looking at them for a moment a awkwardness presented itself. My usual uneasiness around boys began and I nervously laughed saying look how cute, he suddenly looked at me and said " I know. Dogs don't have the usual hang-ups around people unlike we do." "I said yeah with the exception of the crotch sniffing. " he laughed again and said what's your name again. " cayden" I said easily this time. " he said "Chris." as he stuck out his hand i noticed the tattoo on his wrist a little Irish man. I shook his hand they were slightly rough as though he did outside work, he had green eyes with dirty blond hair and a slim muscular frame he wasn't great looking but there was something about him that made him attractive to me, as I wondered what we talked and i realized he had that easy going masculinity thing going on unlike myself. My friends describe me as pretty. I didn't however think I was exceptionally good-looking, but my smooth caramel skin and light brown eyes accent my round face and slightly arched eyebrows which my friends say were arched "to the gods." i guess said something different. I however just didn't see it.
We stood there looking at each other as we shook hands he suddenly looked nervous, but that look of nervousness slowly passed as we talked about dogs and the best ways to train them and such. The conversation came to a end, all to quickly i might add. He said well look there is this dog park somewhere around here maybe we could take the dogs one day since they seem to like he other. As he said this his eyes twinkling in amusement. I looked at him and suddenly looked down again and looked back up as he was intently looking at me and suddenly as if hit by lighting, I said "yeah that would be cool." he said "okay" see you around then, later man. He sauntered back toward the edge of his building whistling for his dog "come on girl." He looked back and waved as I was hugging the dog, as I looked back towards him he was still standing there smiling briefly as he went upstairs. I suddenly thought yeah right like he will want to hang out?
Stayed Tuned for more in the life of Cayden.