Date: Sat, 23 Mar 2019 10:03:29 +0100 From: David Roslyn Subject: Fear by David Roslyn (category: Beginnings) - Chapter 10 Disclaimers: This work is a work of fiction and is my property. The story and characters are fictitious and any resemblance to anyone or any actual event is coincidental. There are three distinctly different main characters that will appear as the story progresses. You should be legally allowed to read this type of material before continuing. As it is based on an actual book, I had published a few years ago – free for your enjoyment – the story will not contain explicit material in all the chapters BUT don't fret, as it is more the exception than the rule. Note that there will be a violent scenario. If this will trigger any trauma for you, please be aware of it before you start reading. Please direct any comments or feedback to my email address at davidrolsynauthor2019@gmail.com. Enjoy! And remember to donate to Nifty! CHAPTER TEN Daniel James giving Johan a beating isn't exactly what I need right now. After James leaves, I go looking for Johan but when I find him in his office, on his chair with his head backwards, resting on the backrest, he seems pissed. There's a wet washcloth over his nose and he's pinching the bridge between his eyes with his one hand. "I'm sorry for what happened, Oom Johan. I didn't expect him to do that." Actually, Johan should be the one apologising, but I can't afford to lose this job. Except for working with him, I enjoy it here. "Just fuck off." His voice is calm, but menacing. I remain there for a second, thinking of what else to say. Coming up with nothing, I scamper off to my own room, wondering what he meant earlier, when he said he'd make me pay for it. The rest of the afternoon and evening goes by uneventful but I'm tense though. Johan's nowhere to be seen. Regardless, I join the guys at the bar and later take myself off to bed, marginally drunk. We're not allowed to get drunk on the premises, but I have so much on my mind and just want to feel better in some way. Concern over what Johan may do next is eating me up inside. *** The following morning, I wake up to a wet and miserable rainy day. In this weather, it'll be difficult getting around the farm. Everything's muddy and soggy. At breakfast, I notice he isn't in the staff canteen and afterwards, as I pass by his office, he isn't there either. Shit. I hope the fight hasn't caused him more harm than just a bloody nose and a bruised ego. Lunch time comes and goes and again he's nowhere to be found. Just as I'm about to go to my room to change my wet clothes for something dry, I get a call on my mobile. It's my mother. "Hi Ma. What a nice surprise. How are you? "Fine, Daniel." Her voice stern. "This isn't a social call. We just got off the phone with the foreman there and he tells us that you're kissing men at work. Is this true?" I think fast. There's no way to explain this and my stomach knots up. "Yes, Ma. James did kiss me." "Who's James? Does he work with you?" "No. he's a guy I met at the beach, the other day. He helped me when I fell off a large rock. He's an American on holiday in Cape Town." "Good. So, he won't be around for too long." She doesn't even ask if I'm ok from the fall. I have nothing further to say and wait for her to speak. "You know that your Pa and I don't like the idea of any of our children, or even our family and friends, being one of those homosexual perverts you read about. It's a sin and you should be careful who you hang out with. We won't accept this from you. Your Pa's furious and told me to tell you that if he found out that you're a moffie, he'll disown you. You understand?!" She couldn't be more direct than that. Not surprising though. She's never been someone to mince her words. I take too long to reply. "Do I make myself clear, Daniel?! Homosexuality is an abomination in the eyes of the Lord and we will not have that kind of nonsense in our family. Jy verstaan?" "Ja, Ma." My heart's racing and the fear of losing them grips my gut. I actually feel as if I want to shit myself right here and now. "Just as long as you understand fully the implications of your choices. It will not only affect your relationship with us but also your future. We will no longer support you and that would probably be the end of your apprenticeship over there." "Yes, Ma." "Now. Go apologise to that nice man. I think his name's Johan, and put this whole ugly business behind you. I won't mention it again." "Ok. Ma." "Good night. We'll speak soon." "Nag, Ma." The phone goes dead. Johan's really fucked up things for me. Apologise, my ass. I've tried that already in any case. Luckily, my parents seem to think it was one time thing. I wish I could just be myself and be accepted for who I am, But, no, I have to make this work until I'm done studying and then try and figure out how I can be the man I am, and still have my family in my life. I sit down on my bed. This is so unfair. In a country where I'm allowed to be and love who I can, I can't in reality actually do that because of my parent's beliefs and my bigoted boss. It's early evening. Better stop feeling sorry for myself. I won't give Johan the satisfaction of seeing me upset. And so, I get up and make my way to the bar. Everything seems as usual. Good, he hasn't told anyone else. My colleagues and I chat and joke and when a Rugby game comes on the TV they've put up for us, we all sit back and enjoy the game. It's a replay of a game, played last weekend, where the Stormers played the Sharks on home ground. I'm cheering for the Stormers even though the Sharks represent the province I'm originally from. I know who won but never had a chance to watch it live. Interesting, that I consider the Western Cape to be my home. This might be the case for the remainder of my life if it wasn't expected of me to go back home to help my father set-up a wine estate, when I'm done with my studies. Some days, I feel so free and then on others I'm reminded of my limited choices. Johan enters the bar after the game and walks straight up to me. His nose is red and swollen. "So, did you get a call from your rich daddy?" His evil grin causes me to shiver but I play it down. "No. My mom called and we chatted for a while. How do you know they'd call?" Playing dumb and taking a large sip from my brandy and coke for some Dutch courage. His face drops. "She said nothing to you about this afternoon?" Busted! "Oh, no. Did you call them and tell them what happened? Whatever for? They didn't say anything to me." I lie. "I don't believe you. Your dad sounded upset when I told him." He's leaning closer to me. Incredulousness, all over his face. "They were worried about my job and that was about it." I finish my drink and stand up to leave. He grabs my arm. "Where do you think, you're going?" "To my room. You want to join me?" He lets go of me like a hot potato and pulls his face in disgust, glancing around nervously to see if anyone noticed my offer. No one appears to be the wiser, although I'm sure they heard me. "You fucking pervert. Go. I want nothing of the sorts." He barks. I know I'm taking a chance, inviting him, but sort of know he'd freak out big-time. Back in my room, I find a WhatsApp notification on my phone. It's from James. It reads, `Hey there. Was wondering If I could come and take you out the next time you are off duty? When will that be?' It was sent an hour or so ago. I message him back, `Sorry, was with colleagues. I'm off tomorrow, if you can make it? It would be nice.' He replies within seconds. I'll see you tomorrow. I can pick you up at the main gate. Don't want to run into Mr Congeniality again. I send him a laughing emoticon. `Definitely. Text me when you're thirty minutes away. I'll see you then.' `Can't wait,' he replies. I'm excited. I'll get to see him again and we can go hang out in Cape Gate. Maybe we'll grab a movie or something. I can also take him on my own tour of the area, if he prefers. I'll ask him. Getting into my bed with a huge grin on my face, I try and imagine what he'd look like naked. That kiss was amazing, regardless of the resulting drama afterwards. The thought's enough to give me an instant hard-on and I slide my hand down, into my underpants, and grip my dick. Just holding it. I'm not going to jerk myself off. I'll rather save it for the main event, which I'm sure will happen soon enough. Like that, dick in hand, I fall asleep. Dreaming of him.