Date: Wed, 29 Dec 2010 17:36:12 -0500 From: S Smith Subject: I Am Not Gay. Am I? Chapter 9 Warning: The usual disclaimers apply here. If you don't like any of the following, leave now: gay sex, vulgar or harsh language, etc. This is pure fiction. No one in this story is a real person, living or deceased. Please do not copy without my consent. Please practice safe sex. Subject: I'm Not Gay? Am I? Chapter 9 It was my summer to heal myself. Literally and figuratively. My body had been much more badly beated than I realized. I think my parents wanted to keep the truth from me, but I knew it was bad when I could barely stand or even take deep breaths without pain shooting thru me. I knew I must have had broken ribs - especially since my last memories of that night were the boots kicking me as I laid on the ground curled into a ball hearing the word "faggot" being screamed at me.... Thankfully I was almost back to normal by August. Well, not entirely since the summer had not allowed me to continue with my gym routines as before. I was still in pretty good physical form, but I was looking forward to getting back to the gym hardcore and packing on moy muscle. There was something I felt inside when I worked out - it was sense of control. And I need more control. It is the only way out of my sickness. It took me several weeks before I could manuever around without help from my Mom or Dad. It was weird to be relying on Mom again so much like a little kid, but I had to have her help. I needed her in that role - not Josh. Josh. Even as I think his name my mind still flashes with images. I wish I could understand myself. Sometimes I think I know why I am confused.. but I will probably never understand why I ended up with the feelings I have for him. I miss him. I miss the little brother I used to clown around with, the brother I fought with, the brother I laughed with. It all ended one day so long ago.. Ryan Baker took my little brother from me. Forced me to touch my brother in the sickest way against our will. It damaged us. Forever. I couldn't believe when I woke up that day on the farm, back in the world I had left.. The farm, my family, Josh. It was like the ultimate joke. I returned back home and I was there in the bathroom getting undressed by my brother. And he was before me on his knees leaning in with his lips touching the head of my cock. Despite the pain throughout my body, I felt desire wash over me and I placed my hands on his smooth handsome face and allowed his mouth to engulf my dick. I closed my eyes, feeing the warmth of the steam coming from the shower as it surrounded my nude body as at the same moment his mouth encased my cock. It was exquisite. I admit it. I wanted to never stop... I wanted to pull my brother into the shower and make love with him. I wanted to have sex with him over and over. Everything I had felt since that first moment Ryan forced us to touch poured through me and I felt my sick desire take over me. I wanted Josh. My hands gripped the sides of his face and I thrust my hips forward shoving the length of my cock deep into his willing throat. The pain from my ribs tore through my body at that precise moment. My thrust had been so strong that the pain shot through me bringing me to reality. That I was a badly injured man with multiple fractures and a brusied body. That I was committing the utlimate sickness. I was a man with his cock in his brother's mouth. I collapsed in searing pain and fell to the floor. My brother screamed for Mom, while covering my nudity with a towel. The rest was a blur as I was carried by Mom, Dad and Josh to my bedroom. The doctor came shortly after and provided me the pain meds I needed to make it through the weeks of healing ahead. The next month I only remember partially. I was so drugged up on pain pills all I remember was being in bed all day, interrupted by trips to the restroom with help from my family. Even my little sister Lisa did what she could to help me hobble down the hallway though I was probably twice her physical weight. I knew I would get sponge baths once in awhile, but who gave them to me I didn't know fully. Finally in late June on a warm evening after dark I woke to feel a warm sponge rubbing my chest. This time I was finally cognizant enough to open my eyes and see it was Josh bathing me. I was still on so much meds that I had no resistance. I laid there and watched him slowly and methodically bath my chest, arms, legs, and feet. It was obvious he had done it to me before since he seemed to handle it very naturally and with determination. I remember thinking how stupid it was. I had done everything I could to resist my confusing feelings and there I laid naked with only a towel covering my crotch as my brother sponged my body alone in my bedroom. Of course my worthless dick still was like before. It betrayed me as always because by the end the towel over my crotch was fully tented from my erection. He waited skillfully until the end to pull the towel from me and expose my throbbing cock. "It's ok Eric....don't worry about it," Josh said softly as he slowly sponged up the length of my shaft and squeezed the sponge slightly enough to allow warm soapy water to moisted my crotch. I could feel the water encased my cock and balls and a trickle of water slide between my legs into the crack of my ass. I don't think any man in the world would have been able to resist that moment. But I tried verbally.... "Josh... no.....," I whispered. But he would not look at me and instead continued to do his work of bathing me. The sponge did most of the touching, until he got to my balls and held them in his right hand softly, rubbbing the lather into them. Once he had them clean he slid the suds up to my shaft and his hand wrapped around my cock. I closed my eyes to the touch of him when he started o stroke me clean. "Josh... oh God.. .Josh," my voice whispered as the stroking continued and swelled my cock to full erection. Then his hand left me and I heard the sponge being rinsed in the bowl of water by the bed. I felt the clean warm water rinse the lather from my crotch while at the same time a thick fluffy towel rubbed my cock and balls dry. When I allowed my eyes to open again Josh was pouring lotion into his hands and reaching for my body. Once again he came back to my chest, my arms, my legs and smoothed the lotion onto my clean body. My cock throbbed as his hands caressed my pecs, my waist, and even my feet. I never loooked at me, as I stared at him and realized this had probably been done to me many times over the past month by him. He almost looked like a male nurse doing work he had to complete for his shift. Not like a brother molesting another brother. Even as he caressed my balls and lotioned my cock shaft it seemed to be a obligated duty from him despite my throbbing dick that he stroked so eagerly. "Josh..stop....," I said trying to sit up in my bed, but the pain in my ribs and the swirl of my head made me collapse back on the bed. I was trapped... his victim to do what he wanted with. And he did. I had no choice as the lotion was rubbed into my skin, the bottle put away and he leaned in like a skilled work and used his mouth ro encase my throbbing cock. Soft moans filled my bedroom on that dark night. Moans from my own mouth and Josh's. Eventually the moans were replaced with the sounds of wet slurping as his salvia covered my cock and slid onto my balls. His hands held my hips in place and I squeezed the thoughts from my mind of what was happening. All I knew was that I felt such extreme pleasure, accented by the narcotic haze I was in from the meds. I admit it, I did not resist. Instead I moved my hips and provided small thrusts. I couldn't figure out how I had gotten to this place, but somehow the world had brought us back into this moment. Trapped in my own bed gwith my brother feedingh on me. It wasnt until I felt my cum boil and ready to burst that I found my voice again... "Josh... Josh... oh fuck Josh I'm going to cum... stop sucking.. please... I'm going to cum," I honestly wanted him to stop. It we went that far what lined had we crossed? What would that make Josh? I warned him but the sickness in both of us took over. I could not resist my need too cum and he apparently had allowed the sickness to control him so much that he wanted to have my cum. My cock exploded with pleasure, shooting volley after volley of steaming hot cum into the mouth of my brother. Over and over my cock pulsed, as I felt his mouth suck my thick cum down his willing throat. Seven blasts of cum flew from me as I whispered his name with each blast.. "Josh. Josh. Josh....." The night ended with no words. Just the sounds of rustling movement by my bed. I refused to open my eyes to the reality. Only when I heard my bedroom door open did I look to see Josh leaving my room. He looked so normal. Not like fag. It wasn't until he turned to pull my door shut did I see the evidence. His jeans were unzipped and his cock hung from his pants. Dripping. The next morning I told Mom I wanted to take care of myself from now on. That I was fine to shower by myself. "Are you sure you are up to that? Josh said you were too embarassed to let me do it. Maybe Josh shouldn't be doing that", she said. I realized then she was stupidly naive. How stupid. She had been allowing her own sons too commit sin instead. Of course how couldn't know the sickness that existed in her house. There was never another sponge bath again. I forced myself nightly through teeth clenching pain to shower and go back to my room and lock the door. I could see the hurt in Josh's eyes that first week when he would stop by my room. I even heard his knocks at me door in the middle of the nigght. But we did not speak of it.. Of the sponge baths. Of the night he drank my cum. TO BE CONTINUED... I am sorry for the delay in the story. But thank you to all who have stuck by me and are back to read more about Eric's experiences. I have written a few new chapters and hope will enjoy each of them with as much pleasure as I have had writing them. You can email with your comments, questions, or whatever. Send them to mheast111@hotmail.com.