Indulgence ©

By Jack Llawayllynn


Chapter 10: Chains

Matt spent two weeks sulking. He couldn't get the image of Sin fucking Trish out of his head. Drift had been an entertaining diversion but Matt was not willing to go out looking for the kid so he spent his time with Estaban, drinking night after night at Chico's. Estaban was thrilled to have Matt constantly under his thumb but Matt was miserable, bored with his life, pissed that he still craved Sin's presence despite it all.

Matt waved to Ruben and Diangalo as he sauntered into Chico's and then climbed to the second floor to watch the dancers. He spotted the black girl that he had seen on the first night he had come to Chico's. He had since learned that her name was Retana. He found a seat and watched her writhe upon the stage, the heavy bass beat rattling his bones. The men around him whistled and called to her, waving bills to slip into her skimpy g-string. Matt winked at her when she looked his way and she smiled, hips turning his way. Matt blew her a kiss. When the music ended she did not go behind the curtains. Instead she stepped from the stage and sauntered up to Matt.

"Hey white boy," she drawled, her dark eyes sparkling, her full lips painted a shimmering maroon and curving into a sensual smirk.

"Hello my ebony goddess," Matt smiled back. He reached up and laid a hand upon her hip. He knew the men weren't supposed to touch the dancers but he knew he could get away with just about anything in Chico's. She stepped closer, turned, and lowered herself slowly onto his lap, wiggling against his crotch. Matt's dick hardened against her round ass.

"How come the boss likes you so much?" she asked as she turned to drape an arm over his shoulders.

"We're friends."

"Tina says the two of you are lovers," she said smiling.

"Does she? Well what do you think?"

"I told Tina that you watch me far too closely to be gay." She wiggled her bottom against him again.

"You are plenty close enough to feel just how much you turn me on," Matt growled.

"Go upstairs with me and prove it," Retana dared him.

Matt stood, lifting her in his arms as he rose. She wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled as he carried her up the stairs. Several of the men they passed scowled and complained under their breath jealously. Three of the card tables near the door were full but there was an empty table in the corner and Matt set the girl upon it. "What about right here?" he taunted her, expecting her to back out.

"We'll entertain the card players," she said, her full lips so close that Matt barely had to lean down to kiss her. She wiggled out of her g-string even as they kissed. Matt unzipped and pulled his dick out without lowering his pants past his hips. She leaned back on her elbows, her legs opened and bracketing his things. He plunged in, pleased to find her so wet and she threw her head back, her legs tightening around him and drawing him in. Several of the card players turned to watch.

"Having fun?" Estaban asked stonily as he came into the room.

"Ungh," Matt grunted, pumping.

Estaban leaned a hip against a neighboring table and crossed his arms over his chest, frowning deeply. "I didn't give you permission to fuck my dancers."

"You should try it," Matt muttered, sweating now. He reached up to push the skimpy top off her breasts, cupping the full dark globes. She arched, her dancer's body long and lean on the table. "Oh yeah, you should definitely try it."

"Really Matt, you are inexcusable." Estaban turned away to hide the pain in his eyes and went to get a drink. By the time he came back Matt was zipping up his pants and Retana was pulling her g-string back into place. "If you are going to start fucking the clientele Retana then you can go into the stable," Estaban snapped.

"I don't fuck the clientele. Matt gets everything for free so he's not clientele." Retana blew Matt a kiss as she walked away, her ass swaying so seductively that Matt was tempted to go after her, lift her up and put her back on the table.

"I want that in a bottle," Matt sighed as she disappeared.

"Fuck you." Estaban's eyes flared.

"Yeah, yeah." Matt shrugged, took Estaban's glass from his hand, downed its contents and then handed it back. Estaban glared into the empty glass. Suddenly his mouth twisted and he flung the glass against the wall where it exploded in a spray of shards. "You pissed?" Matt asked sarcastically.

Matt knew he was being cruel, that he was pushing buttons, mirroring Sin's penchant for causing emotional harm, but he never expected Estaban to attack him there in public. He never saw the blow coming. Estaban spun and kicked Matt in the face. Matt flew back, twisting, and hit his forehead on the table where he had just fucked a goddess. The impact of the two blows sent his head to ringing even as he crashed to the floor. Blood poured from cuts in his cheek and forehead. The floor spun crazily. He didn't even try to rise. Estaban came to him and knelt down beside him. "You could say I'm a little pissed off Matt," he said dryly then stood and walked away. Matt laid there a moment, tried to rise but fell back again when dizziness overcame him. A few minutes passed and Samson showed up to lift him from the floor and throw him none too gently over his massive shoulder.

"Come on cracker," Samson laughed. "Esty says that I gotta take you down for stitches."

Samson drove Matt to the hospital, helped him from the car and drove off, leaving Matt alone at the emergency room door, weaving on his feet. He staggered in and a nurse grabbed his elbow, steering him into a small room.

"Is Dr. Jamison on duty?" Matt asked.

"Yes. She'll be here in a few minutes."

Matt laid down and felt the room spin. Dr. Jamison came in but he didn't hear much of what she said as she thumbed his lids back and stabbed his eyes with a small light. He let out an enraged bellow when she stuck a needle in his head to numb it so that she could stitch it up. He was expecting the one in his cheek and managed to keep his mouth shut.

"Michael Synn do this to you?" she asked.

"Uh-uh, Estaban did it."

"The same Estaban that broke Michael's leg and got him shot?"

"Yeah, the same." Matt felt sick and had to swallow a few times.

"Don't throw up on me. If you need a pail you tell me," she said sternly. She laid her instruments aside after much tugging and tying on his flesh. "Done. I don't think you have a concussion but you'll have a headache for a few days. Take it easy. Try staying away from violent men Matt. I have many gay patients who are peaceful and loving. You should try it. They seem very happy. I don't want to see you anymore Matthew."

"I'm not gay and I don't want to see you anymore either," he grumbled as he sat up.

Matt caught a cab home and slept for fourteen hours. He felt like hell when he got up. Looking in the mirror he found that he had three stitches in his cheek but there were six in his head and they ran across the scar that Sin had given him. Matt grimaced and decided he needed to get a grip on his life, find some equilibrium, stop making trouble for himself all the time. The first thing he needed to do was apologize to Esty. Matt dressed carefully, neatly, and took a cab to Chico's. He found Estaban on the third floor and asked to speak to him privately. Estaban, who had been taking stock of the liquors waved him into a small storage room.

"What the fuck do you want Matt?" Estaban snapped as he closed the door.

Matt leaned forward and kissed him softly, lingeringly, then pulled back smiling. "I want to apologize for being an arrogant asshole, for trying to force you into sex the last time you stayed with me, for being cruel to you yesterday by flaunting that woman right in your own bar. I really am sorry Esty. I don't know why I do those kinds of things, why I seem to be looking for so much trouble lately."

Estaban crossed his arms but a tiny smile was beginning to play at the corners of his mouth. "What makes you think I'll just up and forgive you?"

"Nothing. I don't expect you to just up and forgive me. I know I have to make amends. What about we get out of here and go get a bite to eat, somewhere nice, somewhere expensive, my treat. How about Travor's?"

"Yeah? Really?" Estaban was surprised by the offer. Matt didn't often like to go out with him in public, he usually seemed edgy and nervous, afraid that people would see them for exactly what they were, lovers out on a date. "I'd really like that Matt."

Estaban drove but Matt kept a hand on Estaban's thigh the whole drive. Estaban parked and they climbed from the car, their eyes meeting over the top, smiling. Matt touched the back Estaban's neck gently as they crossed the lot and Estaban looked up at him, pleased. As they walked toward the restaurant the door opened and out walked Sin and Trish and two other couples. Matt and Estaban stopped dead in their tracks, Matt snatching his hand quickly away from Estaban and putting it in his pocket. Sin glanced up, saw them, and stopped as well. When Trish spotted them her mouth fell open and she stared at Matt with a hundred emotions flashing over her face. She glanced up at Sin nervously, almost fearfully. The two other couples shifted uncomfortably, remembering Matt from when Trish had dated him. It was Estaban that finally broke the silence. "Hello Michael," Estaban said almost regally as he extended his hand as if to a business associate. "Long time no see."

Sin gave him a dark glare but took his hand and shook it for appearances sake. "Estaban," he rumbled with a greeting nod of his head.

"Have you heard? I'm one of the owners of Chico's bar now. You are welcome to come by and bring your friends sometime. I'll even throw in some drinks on the house." Estaban smiled wickedly. Everyone else shifted nervously as Matt and Trish eyed each other.

"Hello Matt," Trish finally said, her voice breathless.

"Hello Trish." Matt's eyes flicked from hers to Sin's. Sin grimaced, glancing from Matt to Estaban.

"Who gave you the stitches?" Trish asked, unable to help herself, wondering if Mike and Matt had been at each other again without Mike telling her about the fight.

"Estaban kicked me in the face," Matt answered honestly. Only Sin laughed.

"Why would he do that?" Trish gasped, her eyes darting to the small dark handsome Latin man beside Matt.

"I did it because Mat was being an ass," Estaban answered her, his crooked smile a little less than friendly.

"I was," Matt admitted. He met Sin's eye in a surprising moment of understanding. Sin smiled a little with genuine mirth.

Estaban saw the exchange between Matt and Sin and frowned. "Well, it was nice seeing you but I'm starved." He nodded to the group and pushed rudely passed Sin. Matt gave Trish one more glance and mumbled his good-byes before following Estaban.

"That was...unpleasant," Matt said when they were seated.

"Yes it was. Who was that girl? The whole time you spoke she kept staring at you. Do you know her well?"

"Oh yes, I know her very well. She was the girl I was dating when I met Sin." Matt took a sip of his water to wash down the vile taste in his mouth.

"Ah, I see, it makes sense now. I had heard Sin was seeing a girl but I couldn't figure out why. Now I know. He's just trying to fuck with your head. Is it working?"

"Yes, actually, it is. He doesn't give a damn for her but she looks like she's in deep with him," Matt said miserably.

"Everyone who gets involved with Sin falls deep. It's his animal magnetism. It's an evil thing." Estaban frowned at his menu. "Sometimes I wish that man was dead."

"Me too."

Estaban glanced up, his eyes dark. "I could arrange it."

"Fuck you."

They ate their meal in virtual silence, the mood strained and unpleasant. Estaban dropped Matt off at his apartment and didn't even ask to come up.

Matt stepped off the elevator and turned toward his door with heavy steps. Nothing about the evening had gone well. Seeing Sin like that had really upset him. Deeply upset him. Especially when they had shared that moment of understanding, that knowledge of mutual respect for the damage Estaban could inflict on a body. That smile had tugged at the bond, renewed his longing for Sin's company.

Matt glanced up and realized that there was someone sitting by his door. Drift lifted a hand, stood and futilely brushed dust off the seat of this pants. "Hey, uh, how are ya?" he asked, his body language showing how tense and nervous he was feeling.

Matt eyed him head to toe. He was dirty again, grungy. His head bristled with new growth, a fresh tattoo of a skull and crossbones shining through the light covering of golden hair. There was bruise on his cheek.

"Somebody beat you up too kid?" Matt asked as he unlocked the door.

"Naw, I fell off a curb while I was drunk last night."

"What are you doing here?" Matt pushed the door open and waved Drift in.

"I'm hungry. The pickings have been poor."

"Go take a shower first then you can help yourself in the kitchen. Wear some of my clothes and throw yours in the washer." Matt pulled his jacket off and tossed it on the couch.

"Thanks, uh...mister,"

"It's Matt."

"Thanks Matt," Drift said grinning.

Matt fixed himself a drink. He turned a chair around backwards and straddled it, staring off into nothingness. He wondered if Trish thought that she owned Sin now, if Sin felt anything at all for Trish. Or were they becoming serious? It was possible. Trish could be a bitch but she could also be sweet and sensual. Matt dropped his chin onto the back of the chair, slumping. If Sin and Trish fell for each other it would be his just dues, having to think of the two of them together, forever.

Drift came down the hall damp and dragging nearly half a foot of pant legs under his feet, holding the waistband of the jeans up to keep them from falling off. "Dude," he said, tilting his head as he looked at Matt, "you look shot out."

Matt lifted his head. "Shot out?"

"Yeah, you know, shot out, done in, used up, burned out, whatever. Just generally shitty. What happened to you? Your boy toy beat you up?" Drift stuck his head in the refrigerator and began to rummage. "I used your razor again, by the way. I guess you noticed."

"I noticed. Help yourself. And yes, my boy toy did beat me up. Well, kicked me in the face actually. He knows karate or some shit." Matt sighed and got up to fix another drink. Drift began pulling things from the fridge and piling them on the counter. Matt leaned against the stove and watched him build an amazingly huge sandwich and begin to devour it. Shaking his head Matt made his way to the bathroom and paused as he entered, raising a brow at the sight of a small gun lying on his bathroom sink. "This piece in here yours kid?" he called around the corner.

"The popper? Yeah, I got it two days ago." Drift's words were mumbled sounding, obviously talking with his mouth full. Matt took a piss then picked up the gun, inspecting it.

"Is it stolen?" He asked as he carried it to the kitchen.

Drift shrugged. "Don't know. I bought it off of a friend of Tecko's for twenty five bucks."

"What do you need it for?"

"It's rough out there. You should carry one too you know. I'm surprised you haven't been mugged walking the streets at night like you do."

Matt shrugged and laid the gun on the counter. "I might do that."

Drift left Matt's refrigerator nearly bare. Matt stripped down to his jeans and slouched onto the couch, watching the last quarter of a football game. Drift came to sit beside him.

"I...uh...I could really use some cash dude," Drift said, his eyes shifting away.

"Yeah? How much we talking here? It was fun but I'm not going to give you three hundred bucks every time you know." Matt leaned his head back wearily.

"I need about a hundred dollars."

"Hmmm...and what do you need it for?"


"Drugs you mean."

"Among other things." Drift still didn't look at him.

"Look kid, I've had a terrible night and I'm in no mood to play sex games, even at a discount." Matt rolled his head and looked over at Drift who was scowling, staring at the floor.

"I really need some dough and you said if I needed money that I was to come to you first."

"So I did. I'll make you a deal. Stay here tonight, sleep with me, just sleep that's all, keep me company, and I'll give you fifty bucks but don't ever expect me to do it again. Next time you'll have to earn it. I don't give something for nothing and I will expect payment in flesh."

Drift nodded his head once, resigned. Matt turned off the television. "Come on, I'm tired." Drift followed Matt to the bedroom and Matt stripped off his jeans and crawled into bed. "Hit the light. And take off those jeans. I'm not going to sleep against denim."

Drift did as he was told and clambered into the bed like a horse falling over. Matt grunted as an elbow caught him in the ribs. "Sorry dude," Drift muttered. Matt rolled over and wrapped an arm around the kid, spooning. Drift flinched but Matt kissed the back of the bald head and snuggled down into his pillow. As he slowly fell asleep Matt wondered if Drift would rob him blind during the night and then disappear. Matt really didn't care. He was too tired and depressed to care. Right now he didn't want to be alone and besides, nothing held any meaning for him anymore.

* * * *

Matt awoke with a start. His flesh crawled uneasily as if someone were watching him. He moved a little, felt a weight on his shoulder and looked down. Drift was draped across him, his leg thrown across Matt's thigh, his head on Matt's shoulder. Matt lifted a hand and very softly rubbed it over the shaven head, a smile playing on his lips.

"That's just great Matt," Sin's voice said sarcastically. Matt jerked his head around to stare at Sin in the doorway.

"God dammit Sin! Will you quit breaking into my apartment? How the hell do you get in here so quietly anyway?"

"I pick the lock and whatever else stands in my way. What the fuck are you doing Matt? That's just a child you've got there." Sin crossed the room with his usual deadly grace and sat down on the edge of the bed by Matt. Drift had not stirred. Sin reached out a hand but it hovered over the boy's head and then withdrew. "How did you do it? More importantly how could you do it? He's little more than a boy."

"And you want him so badly you can taste it," Matt sneered, tightening his hold on Drift's sleeping body. Sin shook his head, his eyes never leaving Drift's face.

"You're wrong. I could have taken advantage of that kid any number of times. But I didn't. I wanted to protect him, keep him away from sick fucks like me and you. He's hard to keep up with though. So, I assume that money he was waving around recently was your doing?" Sin frowned disapprovingly. "Estaban not keeping you happy enough Matt? You got to out and bugger little boys now?"

"Fuck off," Matt said venomously. Drift stirred in his arms, woke and opened his eyes slowly. Matt put a calming hand on Drift's head. The kid looked up at him with sleepy eyes, spotted Sin and made a strangled sound before rolling away forcefully right off the side of the bed onto the floor, taking the blanket and top sheet with him, leaving Matt naked on the bed under Sin's gaze.

"Shit! It's Sin!" Drift's voice floated up from somewhere on the floor. Matt exchanged a surprised glance with Sin and rolled over to peer over the far side of the bed. "What's wrong with you?" Matt asked the bundle on the floor.

"Shit, shit, shit," came the response.

"He doesn't want me to know he'd sleep with a guy," Sin said, his deep voice rumbling. "Get off the floor kid. I won't tell anyone that I found you in bed with Matt if you don't tell anyone that I've been there a few times myself."

"No shit?" Drift's head popped up over the edge of the mattress.

"No shit."

Drift climbed slowly back into the bed, dragging the covers up with him and propped up against the headboard. Matt reached over and rubbed his head, something that was becoming a familiar and comfortable caress to the both of them. Matt turned back to Sin. "Why are you here?"

Sin fished a piece of paper from his jacket pocket and handed it to Matt. Matt raised a brow, unfolded the page and glanced down at it. In bold red lettering it read, "Someone is going to die soon. You've given me such a wonderful selection of targets. Which one will it be?" Matt raised his eyes, horrified. "Where did this come from?"

"Someone slipped it under my door while I was out with Trish last night."

"Why don't you leave her alone Sin? You don't love her, you don't even really want her. I know what you're up to. You're just trying to crawl under my skin and make me itch. Well, it worked okay? I'm half insane as it is. Leave her alone, she's a nice girl." Matt searched Sin's eyes as he spoke. Sin looked away.

"Yeah, well it's my life."

"What is this about?" Drift asked, taking the letter from Matt's hand. "Sounds like someone is trying to scare you shitless dude."

"It's working to," Sin said darkly. "This is no laughing matter. You got a gun kid?"

Drift looked up. "Yeah, why?"

"Keep it handy. I don't think McKenna will come after you but I can never be too sure. Your link with Matt may put you at risk. Matt, take this," Sin said as he pulled the 9mm from an inner pocket of his jacket. "Carry it. You are definitely one of the possible targets mentioned."

"What about Trish?" Mat asked, taking the gun.

"I called her last night, told her to get a gun. She balked, said she wouldn't."

"She doesn't like guns."

"Yeah, so she said. She usually minds me so well but she's giving me trouble over this. I may have to get firm with her."

Matt growled. "I've seen the bruises on her from you getting firm."

"She likes it, just like you did," Sin said cruelly.

"Fuck you."

"Hey Sin, you gonna front for Chains again dude?" Drift asked, breaking into the tense conversation intentionally.

"No, that shit Ross has that gig." Sin made a disgusted face.

Not anymore," Drift grinned. "He's dead dude. Got shot down in a parking lot two nights ago."

"What?" Sin nearly shouted. "Oh shit, maybe McKenna has sent more of a message than just this note."

"I don't know who this McKenna is but I'd say there was no message in Ross's murder other than `don't fuck my bitch'. He was screwing some guy's girlfriend on the hood of the dude's car and the guy pulled out a gun and put a bullet in Ross's brain pan." Drift put a finger to his head and cocked his thumb. "Left one hell of a mess."

"I bet it did. No, I don't think Heath will have me back, he's still pissed."

"Aw shit, he's over it. He looked down at Ross twitching on the pavement and said `guess I better call Sin.' I'm surprised you haven't heard from him already." Drift rose and headed for the bathroom.

"What the hell is he talking about?" Matt asked curiously.

"Forget it, it's nothing. Just watch your back, keep that gun handy. I need you to tell Estaban to be on his guard too. I really don't think McKenna will go for him but who knows? I gotta get out of here. I have to go make sure that Trish got a gun." Sin rose to go.

"Even if she doesn't know how to use one?" Matt asked, his eyes holding Sin's.

"I'll teach her."

Matt wanted to tell Sin how he felt, that he missed him, how he really wanted Sin to break it off with Trish and come back, to try to regain that bond they had shared. He wanted to explain to him that he hadn't fucked Drift last nigh, that it really wasn't what it looked like, not this time. He opened his mouth but couldn't find the words. Sin turned away and Matt closed his mouth, frustrated. He watched Sin leave, feeling depressed and beaten down. Drift came back into the room. "Where's Sin?" he asked.

"He left."

"Damn dude, when I woke up and saw him I thought I was going to die. I had no idea he swung both ways. I never would have guessed it in a million years. He's so hard, you know, savage. But damn he's cool. I can't believe you've slept with him. What was that like?" Drift plopped down on the bed, sending the mattress bouncing.

"Just full of questions aren't you?" Matt grumbled. "Get dressed and get out. I have shit to do."

"You owe me fifty bucks."

"Oh yeah." Matt got up and retrieved his wallet, a little surprised to find all of his money still in it. All he had was a wad of twenties. He pulled three out and handed them to Drift. "You'll owe me for that extra ten dollars."

"Money?" Drift asked, his eyes on the bills.

"Whatever. You can pay me back the cash or we can work something out for the other ten bucks. Now get the hell out, I'm edgy."

"I can see that. Sin gets under your skin doesn't he?" Drift eyed Matt thoughtfully. "That's why you were so upset last time when I said I knew him."

"Fuck off kid," Matt growled and stalked into the bathroom. When he came out Drift was dressed in his own clothes once more and digging in the fridge again. "You need to buy some food."

"I had plenty until you came over. Take a sandwich but by god will you please leave?"

Drift laughed and took his time making a sandwich before actually taking his leave. Matt sighed when he was gone. He picked up the phone and dialed Estaban's number. He got the machine. "Estaban, it's Matt. I really need to talk to you. Give me a call, okay?" Matt hung up and went to fix himself some breakfast. He had just finished eating when the phone rang.

"Matt? What's up?" Estaban asked.

"We need to talk. Can you come over?"

"Yeah, I'll be there in a few minutes." Estaban sounded worried but did not ask Matt to elaborate over the phone.

When Estaban arrived Matt sat him down and explained to him about McKenna and what part he had played in Sin's life. Estaban was impressed with the story, seeming to glean some understanding of Sin's past behavior from it. He assured Matt he would start carrying his gun.

"God, when you were on the phone you sounded so serious. I thought you were going to tell me that you didn't want to see me anymore," Estaban said, entwining his fingers with Matt's.

"No, nothing like that Esty. Tell me something though, who or what is Chains?"

"You don't know?" Estaban looked stunned.

"I have no idea."

"How you can know so much about Sin and yet so little about him at the same time astounds me. How can you not know about Chains?

Matt shrugged. "What's the deal?"

Estaban stared at him with wide eyes and then shook his head incredulously. "You know what? I'm not going to tell you. It's something you have to see to understand. I'll show you when I can. I'm not sure when that will be but I doubt it will be a very long wait. Word on the street is that Ross Teller is dead so it shouldn't be more than a week."

"Estaban! Just tell me!" Matt demanded.

"No, I won't. You'll just have to wait and see for yourself." Estaban's jaw was stubbornly set so Matt let the subject drop.

* * * *

Estaban called Matt three days later. "Tonight's the night," he said mysteriously.

"The night for what?"

"I'll show you Chains. Wear jeans, nothing nice. I'll pick you up at ten."

In the car Matt pestered Estaban to tell him where they were going but Estaban refused. Finally the car pulled up to a bar that sported the name The Bloody Finger and parked. Matt stared at the patrons going in. Most were dressed in leather or black denim. Some had so many tattoos and piercings that Matt gawked at them. A girl with blue hair, black lips and a silver chain running from her nose to her ear lobe gave Matt a wink as he climbed from the car and Matt glanced over at Estaban doubtfully. Already he could hear the nerve shattering bass drum beat of a heavy metal band inside. "I don't know about this place Esty. I'm not really into the real hard stuff."

Estaban laughed. "You will be after tonight. I know you. Hell, this is probably the biggest mistake of my life, bringing you here. I'll lose you after this."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Matt asked, puzzled.

"Come on, let's go in." Estaban led the way into the bar. There was a poster on the door but Matt paid it no attention as he passed, seeing only a heavy metal band in the picture, the singer hunched over the microphone in his hand like he was in pain, his long hair obscuring his face. Inside Matt could not yet see the stage but the pounding beat had been joined by a teeth clenching guitar rift and a man screamed into the microphone like he had been run over by a lawn mower. Matt grimaced at the noise and tried to keep up with Estaban. The crowd inside was unbelievably thick and he had to wade through an ocean of strange looking humanity to move toward the stage. The music suddenly shifted to a softer tone and the singer's voice came through the speakers, deep and rumbling, a sound that touched Matt inside his spinal chord. He stopped trying to catch up with Estaban and stood there, listening. The guy could really sing when he wasn't screaming like soul tortured. Matt shook himself and waded forward. Finally they broke through into the main room just as the music crashed into the mind shattering heavy rhythm again. Matt stopped and stared. Of course it would be Sin up there.

"That's Chains," Esty yelled over the music. "Sin joined them two years ago but they kicked him out and hired Ross after Sin broke the drummer's wrist. Apparently they've forgiven him. They haven't had a crowd like this since Sin left."

Matt nodded to say that though he had hardly heard a word Estaban had said he'd been able to puzzle it out by reading his lips. Matt looked up at the stage again and shook his head. Sin was growling into the mike, the lyrics in time with the drum beat but Matt couldn't understand a word of them. Around him the crowd cheered and screamed along, some thrashing, headbanging, a mosh pit opening up in the center of the crowd before the stage. Matt watched as a girl tried to climb up onto the stage only to be knocked roughly back into the crowd by a big bouncer who stood guard. Sin didn't even notice. He threw his head back, his voice a haunting and chilling growl, his black hair slicked to his head with sweat, trailing over his shoulders and clinging wetly to his chest. Matt noticed that he was barefoot as well, wearing only a pair of tight black jeans. Matt wanted to crawl up on the stage and fuck him, better yet, be fucked by him. Estaban saw the look in Matt's eyes and shook his head.

The song ended and another began, this one much slower than the last. Matt was actually able to catch half the lyrics but found them disturbing, full of death and hate and hunger. Sin's voice though was something altogether intoxicating. He could change from a harmonious and beautiful crooning to a wet gravel growl with hardly a breath between. Sometimes he would scream like a man abused, tortured, in the throws of deepest agony. Matt actually took a step forward, then another before Estaban's hand at his sleeve stopped him. Estaban tugged him back out of the main room where the music wasn't quite so loud. Matt hesitated, he didn't want to leave. He wanted to watch Sin perform but finally he followed. They still had to yell to one another to be heard.

"Hypnotic isn't it?" Estaban shouted.


"I told you this would change things!" Estaban yelled.

"No, it hasn't!"

"You lie! Want a drink?"


They waited in a long line behind a bald man with metal spikes implanted in his head to get a beer. "He's mostly doing covers and some of Chain's old songs tonight. Now that he's back with the band he'll probably write some new lyrics!" Estaban told Matt loudly.

"Why didn't you tell me he sang with a band?"

"I thought you knew! You seem to know everything else about him!"

"Hell, I've only known him a few months!"

"Dude, you know Sin?" a guy behind him yelled to Matt. Matt nodded. "Could you introduce me sometime?!" Matt shrugged noncommittally and glanced down at Estaban who just shook his head. They made their way back into the larger room where Sin was down on his knees, bent over the microphone in his hand, snarling obscenities and death threats to the crowd. The audience was going wild, reaching for him, screaming for him. Sin looked up as he breathed in and his eyes somehow locked with Matt's. Suddenly he stopped singing and waved a hand at the band as he rose, quieting them. The crowd became suddenly hushed, the building so quiet that Matt felt goose bumps down his back. Sin smiled evilly.

"Sorry to stop the show folks," he announced, his tone saying that he wasn't sorry in the least, "but I've just spotted a couple of old friends of mine in the audience."

"Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck," Estaban muttered nervously, his hands clenching and unclenching.

"I want all of you to say hello to Matt," Sin said and the response was absolutely deafening, "Hello Matt!" the crowd screamed, everyone craning their necks to follow Sin's gaze, trying to figure out just which one Matt was. "Now say hello to Estaban," Sin instructed and again came the deafening roar, "Hello Estaban!" Sin smiled and cocked his head, sweat running off his body in visible rivulets. "Start the song again guys." Estaban sighed in relief as the music started again and Sin shifted his attention away from them.

"Come on! Let's get the fuck out of here before he has them douse us in beer or something worse." Estaban took Matt's wrist and pulled him roughly towards the doors. Once outside Estaban hustled Matt to the car, started it and pulled out of the lot with a squealing of tires. "Shit, shit, shit. I never thought he'd spot us! That little greeting routine was just to show you that he was in complete control of that crowd Matt. For a moment I thought he might tell them to beat us to death or something. They'd do it too. They adore him, worship him. He threw a bandanna into the crowd once after getting them all stirred up and forty people were hospitalized from fighting over it. I think about thirty people actually ended up with at least a small piece of it. They shredded it and would just as quickly shred a person to tiny bits too if he told them to."

"Good god! You aren't serious? That bar is awfully small to handle a crowd like that though isn't it? I mean, aren't there regulations about how many they can cram into a small space?" Matt ears were still ringing and he wondered if he was yelling as he spoke.

"Oh, I'm sure management had no idea when they booked Chains that it would bring in a turnout like that. Last week it wouldn't have, not with Ross singing. Word got out that Sin was back and all the diehard Sin fans showed up tonight. Right now Chains is just a local phenomenon but if a scout ever gets wind of them they could go worldwide." Estaban grimaced. "Just think of how big Sin's ego would inflate. Thing is though that it's Sin that won't commit to a contract of any kind with the band. He won't say why. Might have something to do with the McKenna situation though. Maybe he's worried for the band members."

"Maybe," Matt said, staring out the window. He could still hear Sin's growl in his head, still see the sweat pouring over his body. He thought he had it bad for Sin before, now the desire was tripled. Now he not only wanted to fuck Sin and be fucked by him, he wanted to own him. Matt's dick was hard as rock and painfully uncomfortable in his jeans. He thought about Sin's hands, how they had hurt him, punished him, possessed him. He wanted Sin to do it again. He wanted to make Sin want him as badly as Matt wanted him. He had been Matt's once, Matt realized that now, that even though Sin had never said he wanted Matt to be true to him Matt now knew that Sin had wanted to possess him for his own and that it was a two way street. Matt had thrown away his hold over Sin, that Sin had been his first and only. When he had gone and fucked Estaban that ruined had Matt in Sin's eyes. It wouldn't be easy to draw him back. But he would. Damn it, he would.