My name is Sebastien. At the age of 22, I was in the somewhat peculiar position of not really understanding my sexual orientation. I'm operating on the assumption that most people know fairly early in life; whether they admit it to themselves or not is another matter. But I was curious in this respect. I was attracted to girls, sexually and romantically, (more towards the latter) but I had never seriously dated or gone past first base. I obviously wasn't an extrovert in that area, nor was I desperate to be with a girl. This was no doubt partly due to experiences in my younger years.
As a young boy, probably from the age of 6 on, I was sexually molested by my brother to the point where it became a mutual experience. I don't ever remember being forced, and all my memories of that period are generally positive. By the time I was a tween (he was 4 years my senior), things had definitely progressed. Gone were the days of innocent dry humping; in was masturbation. By 11, we had indoctrinated my best friend into our group, and our little circle jerk became a routine at sleepovers. (More about my friend a bit later).
As I had always been a cautious kid, and my brother never forced me, it took him a while to get me to a serious level of sexual play. But by age 13, I had tentatively sucked on half of his 7 inch erection. (It seemed massive at the time). Of course, he had been blowing me for a while before I worked up the courage myself. Soon after that, I was sucking my friend's dick. He would only return the favor occasionally and unenthusiastically (He was definitely straight as an arrow), but I didn't mind. I found out that I actually enjoyed giving blow jobs. There was something very stimulating to me about having my mouth on a warm, stiff penis.
By my mid teen years, my brother was out of the house, but we would continue to have sessions periodically into my late teens. It never went past oral; the same with my best friend. Actually, I never swallowed my brother, and only attempted my friend the very last time I blew him. Now I wish I was a little braver, but alas, those days are gone. In any case, my friend and I continued to fool around until I was about 17 or 18. Since then, sans very sporadic episodes with my brother, I haven't had sexual contact with anyone, and haven't been able to engage in my favorite pastime: jerking and sucking a nice clean cock.
But back to my current situation. You can see how my prior experiences might make my orientation a bit complicated. You might think my past enjoyment of sucking is a clear sign of my homosexuality. Here is the problem with that theory: I don't find myself attracted to adult men at all: certainly not romantically, and only occasionally sexually. And in those instances, it is always a very young guy who looks younger than he actually is. Aha, now you see my attraction more clearly! I like boys. Well, don't blame me, I didn't ask for it, and I sure as hell know that it's morally wrong. But I can't help it! No doubt a psychologist would figure this directly relates to my molestation and early sexual experiences. Whether they're right or not is kind of irrelevant. I can't change it now.
To further complicate things, let's get back to adult guys.... I could see myself fooling around with someone my own age. Nothing past oral though, and that only in a certain circumstance. As far as women, I would like to eventually try it out. And again, a women is the only one of the two I would ever consider a long term, romantic relationship with. So there you have it. I dare you to diagnose my sexual orientation! My self diagnosis is as follows: Concerning adults I'm bisexual, but romantic only with women. But deep down I'm a pederast who admires boys across all ages.
Whew! That's over with. Now I can get onto my story. Trust me, all that babble is relevant. It has to do with a guy I met at my gym, Justin. Justin is a good looking guy; any straight would admit it too. He works hard on his physique, even though his studies and job doesn't give him a lot of free time. I think girls would describe him as cute. He's 20, but he could pass for 16 or 17 depending on how good of a look you got. That's how I first noticed him at the gym. With no one under 16 allowed at our facility, this young looking guy caught my eye as he came into the cardio area. I did a double take because he looked less than 16 at first with his baby face. Upon slightly closer inspection, his developed physique and manner made it clear he was much older.
I don't interrupt people at the gym (I hate it when people do that to me), so I had no occasion to talk to Justin at first. Eventually, we passed each other enough times in the locker room and parking lot to know each other's names and such. I even spotted him a couple times over the next few weeks, and he returned the favor.
About a month after we met, I became better acquainted with Justin. He had finished his workout ten minutes before me, and headed into the locker room. Our gym has a weird L-shaped bank of individual showers, and I always preferred one of the couple of showers on the far end around the other side. It gave more privacy. So I headed to my typical shower stall around the corner. Someone was using the end shower, so I started stripping down for the only other stall in the section. Before I got very far, the shower stopped and out stepped Justin, fully nude.
“Oh, hey Sebastien!” Justin exclaimed.
“Wassup dude?” I was trying not to stare. I had a good quick view when he first came out of the shower, and I was secretly enthralled with the meat hanging between his legs. He shaved, and it brought back memories of my early days. I tried to not be obvious as I stole quick glances at his loose hanging dick and balls. He seemed about average, but soft penises are always hard to read. (pun intended)
Justin dried off, but didn't cover up and seemed in no hurry to get his clothes on. As he delayed and shuffled around his things, I started to get the feeling he was showing off a bit. And he may have similarly concluded that I was indeed watching. I figured I had to get on with it before I became too obvious. I noticed out of the corner of my eye that he was slightly more swollen than before. This put me on the rise quick, as I was already headed there. Just great! If it wasn't bad enough that there was this shaved cock swinging around in front of me, I would soon be erect with nowhere to hide! This had the chance of being really embarrassing, so I just went for it instead of contemplating it. I skinned off the rest of my clothes and reached behind me for my towel, as he started to put his clothes on. Before I could make another move, Justin interrupted my dash for the shower.
“Oh, you shave too?” He asked politely. “Don't you think it's better that way? So less irritating!”
“Uh, yeah, it's, ahh, better.” I was kind of thrown by his casual conversation considering my erection was on display. I turned for the shower, but he threw another question my way.
“Do you use a razor or a trimmer? I've found the razor a little dangerous at times” he chuckled.
“Uhm, the trimmer for the sensitive parts, and a razor to smooth out the top, when I feel like a close shave.” His casual conversation made me a little more comfortable, but my dick didn't seem to register that comfort, as it continued to strain upward. He was nearly fully clothed while I shifted awkwardly from one foot to another, using my towel to partially hide my junk.
“Well, you're smarter than me. I haven't used the razor for a couple years” he said with a laugh as he slipped on his trainers. “Bad experience, you know?”
“Right.” I really wanted to get in the shower.
“Well, I'll leave you to it. See ya later Sebastien.” With that he gave me a wink and grabbed his bag and headed around the corner.
Not wanting to get caught with an erection by anyone else, I stumbled into the shower, still taken aback by my encounter with Justin. As soon as the water hit me, I soaped up and started working my erection. I hadn't seen a nice cock up close and personal since the last time I sucked my brother, a couple years previous. As a result, I was pretty horny. Within a minute, I was shooting ropes of cum against the shower wall.
As an adult I had never given much thought to fooling around with a guy my age. But Justin put thoughts into my head that reminded me of the sexually adventurous days of my youth. And in my current state of sexual euphoria, I hoped that his openness with his body was a signal of his willingness to play around.
Of course, after my orgasmic bliss wore off, my practical side found this argument slightly desperate. Surely I was just projecting and reading into the situation what I wanted. But what couldn't be argued was that Justin and I certainly became closer after that confrontation. We started working out together at the gym more, which led to hitting the showers at the same time, which led to my growing familiarity with his naked body, and vice versa. Soon enough, we would hang out together with a couple friends at a local restaurant, or catch a movie. Eventually, we were hanging out a couple times a week at my apartment, just the two of us. Turns out we had a lot of the same interests, and spending time together was pretty easy and relaxing. So as he had a lot of free time over the summer (he was a Junior at the local college), we got to know each other pretty well over the next couple of months. In fact, very well. It only took a couple weeks of working out and talking with him to pick up some vibes that he was gay. He definitely wasn't flamboyant in any respect, but I just had a feeling. Sure enough, as soon as the topic came up a week later, he freely admitted it.
This revelation somehow reminded me of my initial desire to fool around with him, and gave me hope that it was more possible than before. I mean, straight guys will jack off together, but the older they get, the less a chance of it happening. Our frequent nudity in the showers hadn't led to anything physical, but as we became better friends, we would have conversations about all sorts of topics, including sex. And once Justin was out to me, that added yet another topic we would often discuss. It took me awhile to gather the courage to ask him about his sexuality, but he was very open and comfortable talking about it. He told me that he knew for sure he was gay, and comprehended what that meant, at 12 years old. I asked him how he knew at that age: 'well, when you make out for an hour in your bedroom with another boy, you have a pretty good idea which team you're gonna play for.'
Of course, our conversations weren't a one way street. We talked about me too, which led to some uncomfortable moments on my part. But to his credit, Justin was encouraging and supportive in a way that made me want to tell him things I hadn't told anyone before. We had one particular session at my apartment when it all came out. I shared about the sexual experiences of my childhood and teen years, as well as the confusion about my orientation. Justin was so open and understanding that I even shared my deep, dark secret with him: my attraction to young boys. He was great about it, and while saying he wasn't particularly attracted to boys, he admitted to the occasional kinky fantasy that involved a youngster. I can't describe how safe and welcome his support made me feel; like a great burden was lifted off my shoulders. It made me so comfortable around him that I felt I could ask him anything. We were sitting on a small couch in my living room, facing each other.
“Justin, if you don't mind me asking, what kind of fantasies have you had involving boys.” I looked at him hesitatingly, wondering if I crossed a line, but feeling like I hadn't.
“Okay, but if I have to share a fantasy, so do you. Deal?” His answer made me very happy, and horny. For some reason, my preceding confession, talking about my lust for boys, had gotten me worked up. Now I was eager to hear face to face, for the first time, another guy's fantasy involving boys.
“Sounds good to me. You go first.”
“Alright, but I have to warn you, my fantasies work best for me when I have some stimulation, so if you don't mind, I'm gonna stroke myself for inspiration.” Justin had a cheeky grin plastered on his face as he dipped his hand underneath his shorts. I was a bit disappointed, hoping he was going to slip the elastic shorts down and stroke out in the open. But then again, nothing happens all at once.
“Hey, that's fine, as long as I can do the same thing if you get me worked up.” We were grinning at each other like little kids experimenting for the first time.
“Haha, that's cool. But you're the expert on these types of fantasies, so mine might not meet the grade.”
“Whatever, I'm sure it'll be great.” I paused and looked down at his crotch, something I had been trying not to do. He certainly had a bone already, the shorts material stretched as he slowly wanked himself. “Well, you might as well start.”
“Alright, here goes. I have this recurring fantasy about this guy I went to high school with. We never fooled around, but were pretty good friends. Anyways, I would have liked to do something with him, and I used him as inspiration a bunch of times in my jack off sessions.
“I thought this was about a boy, numb nuts.”
“Geez, so impatient. It is, just wait....So there was this one time over his house when his little brother, who must have been about 13 at the time, passed me in the hallway wearing nothing but a towel. He had just gotten a shower, and the water was still dripping from his hair. He was so adorable! He had this dark hair, but the most shocking turquoise eyes. And he had the nicest little body, his shoulders just starting to develop, and sweet little four-pack abs. Kind of right up your alley, huh?”
“Hmm, sounds tempting” I half joked. I slipped my hand down my pants and fondled my balls as Justin kept up a slow but steady stroke under his shorts.
“Yeah, I bet! Anyways, he liked to joke around with me, so just before he went into his bedroom, he got my attention and turned around and whipped the towel off, showing off his tight little ass. He laughed and darted into his bedroom and shut the door. I know he was just being playful, but starting that night, I would fantasize about going after him into that bedroom.” He paused, as if thinking about something.
“And, what do you think you might have done?” I asked slyly.
“Yeah, yeah, I'm getting to that.” He looked up at the ceiling another 20 seconds before he continued. “The way I see it, I'd go into his room and rip the towel off him, and cup his smooth ball sac in my hand. I'd turn his head up towards mine and kiss his seventh-grade lips until he opened up and we'd explore each other's mouths. He'd be moaning as I move down and kiss and suck his neck, all whilst I start stroking his beautiful erection.” Justin's breathing was a bit more shallow, and he was pounding his cock under his shorts, a big wet spot forming. I was shocked at his descriptive language, being forcefully reminded of...well, myself. I was getting off just watching him recall this hot fantasy.
“I'd reach around and start playing with his sweet ass, fingering him as he sucked on my nipples. I'd push two fingers inside him and have him begging me to fuck him, but I would hold off and push him down until he had 6 inches of man meat in front of him. Slowly he would take all of my juicy cock into his mouth and down his throat as he looks up at me with those puppy dog eyes. He gently squeezes my balls as I take his head of shaggy black hair in my hands and face fuck him. He stares up at me with those eyes, and I start jizzing so much that it dribbles out the corners of his mouth.” Justin was so hot now that he quickly pushed his shorts down and continued to stroke his dick furiously. His eyes were closed as he made love to himself. I figured it was okay to join in, so I slipped my pants off and continued beating off. Without losing a beat, he continued:
“I take my dick out of his battered mouth as it's still pulsing out cum. I toss him onto his bed and feel up his ass again. Like a little slut he holds up his legs to give me better access, and I bring my cum-covered cock to his entrance and push in. He yells out in pain and pleasure as I bottom out inside him. Right away I start riding him, plowing him deep. He moans as I breed him, and soon enough he shoots cum out his little dick without me touching him. I scoop up the cum from his chest and feed it to him, letting him lick it from my fingers, as I finally cum again deep inside him.” Justin slowed down his stroking as he calmed down. I wondered how he kept himself from cumming after all that. I had to stop a couple times to keep a lid on it myself.
But now came the moment of truth. Justin opened his eyes, and I could almost see him reading the changed situation. Neither of us are wearing pants, and we both have our erections in hand, leaking pre-cum as we continue to fondle ourselves.
“Oops, I guess I got a little carried away” Justin chuckled. It was almost as if he expected this outcome. Of course, I should have to.
“That's okay, I don't mind. I really enjoyed your story though. You sure you don't have a thing for boys though? You sounded pretty convincing.” I grinned back at him.
“It's not a full-time thing” he laughed. “But I'm glad you enjoyed it.” He paused for a while, watching me with a smile as I continued to slowly stroke my dick. “Look man, why don't we just take care of these” he said casually as he wanked himself. “Looks like you could use some relief after my story.”
“I think that's a good idea” I tried to say without too much enthusiasm.
Justin yanked off his shorts and slipped off his shirt and sidled over to me. I skinned my shirt as well and settled down side by side with him. Our naked thighs touched and it felt like electricity. I reached over and tentatively grasped his warm, pulsing erection. I melted into the couch as he returned the favor. I hadn't shyly experimented with someone like this for a long while.
“Dude, I haven't done this in a long time” I confirmed to him.
“Just do whatever comes naturally, Seb. This is just between us, no strings attached.” I think he felt a need to say that last part just in case he thought that I thought this meant something more to him than just fooling around. I appreciated the gesture, but I knew Justin well enough to know he wouldn't do something like that.
We got into a rhythm stroking each other. It felt so good to be sharing like this with someone else, after such a long absence of any sexual touch from another person. But there was one thing I wanted to do more than anything else, and I wasn't going to let an opportunity like this slip away. We had been masturbating in silence for only a couple minutes when I let go of him and turned my body and leaned my face down to his crotch. Justin let go of me so I could get a better angle. I put my nose right above his balls and breathed in, his hot erection pulsing against my cheek. He was clean and smelled great. I softly kissed his balls and up his straining penis. I looked up at him briefly as I slipped the head of his penis into my mouth. He moaned loudly as he watched me.
I closed my eyes as I savored the texture and flavor of his cock. It had been so long since I had sucked someone, and I felt ravenous. I licked up and down his erection like a popsicle, something I had always enjoyed doing to my friend as a kid. Then I went down on him again, sucking in earnest whilst I jacked my own cock. He rested his hands on my head and let me do the work. Soon enough, he started to tense up.
“Sebastien, I'm gonna cum soon if you keep that up.”
I moaned my approval as I continued to slurp on his beautiful cock. Within a minute, he was ready.
“Here it comes!”
I was more than ready. I had never fully swallowed someone before, but I was too horny not to try. His penis pulsed strongly in my mouth as I felt the first shot of warm cum hit the back of my mouth. That creamy, tangy liquid in my mouth again was enough to throw me over the edge, and I came hard as I rubbed my cock against his leg. In rapid succession, he fed me six more volleys of jizz. I swallowed hard and fought back the urge to gag, and I actually managed to contain most of his load in my mouth and to swallow. As we both came down from our high, I continued to suckle on his wilting penis, drawing the last drop of cum from his spent balls.
I sat up next to him and wiped the corners of my mouth and looked across at him. He had a huge incredulous grin on his face.
“Sebastien, that was great man! You've got a talented mouth.”
That made me smile. “Yeah, well I like it and I've had practice. Though I think I'm a bit rusty.”
“Nah, it's like riding a bicycle. Anytime you want to practice though, just let me know.”
“Ha, sounds good. I might just take you up on that. You're the perfect size to suck.”
“Yeah, I've heard that. And hey, I'll take care of you whenever you want.” With that, Justin leaned down and sucked my soft penis into his mouth, cleaning it of any cum. He sat back up and smiled at me. I intended to take advantage of this.
“Alright Justin, give me thirty minutes and you can prove it!”
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