Date: Thu, 3 Jan 2002 22:04:28 -0800 (PST)
From: J X <xxx_supafly@yahoo.com>
Subject: Memoirs Chapter 4.

As always, this story cannot be used on any site
without my consent.  If you wish to use it, contact me
at XXX_Supafly@yahoo.com.  This, and all my other
stories can be found on my website
http://www.angelfire.com/mi3/TripleX.  Check it out
for future updates on my writing.

Disclaimer:  This story features sex of the gay kind.
If that's not your cup of tea, switch to coffee and
don't read on.  For those of you still here, I hope
you enjoy.

*******************

Back in the present. I could hardly sleep that night.
I got up several times during the night and popped in
my demo. I would only play a couple songs, then
attempt to go back to sleep. But the sleep would last
only minutes. I was so in love with hearing my voice,
on my favorite songs, that I could barely go an hour
without hearing them. I gave up on sleep eventually,
and turned the CD back on. I walked out onto the
balcony and lit the candles, then layed down on the
futon and stared into the moonlight. I noticed off in
the distance a department store with a blinking 24 on
the sign. Since I couldn't sleep, I made the decision
to walk to that store. It was on the walk to that
store, I made the decision to take my relationship to
the next level.

* * *

Chapter 4: The Next Level

The Texas night air was pleasantly warm as I walked to
that Department Store. I felt a little like a weirdo,
walking to a store at 4 am to buy sex necessities and
food. But oh well, I'd never been to Dallas in my
life, so its not like I'd be recognized. And I
seriously doubted that if I became famous, some
cashier working at 4 am would remember and say "I sold
condoms and lube to that kid once!" And if she did, oh
well, that'll be my publicists job to take care of.

I walked into the store and grabbed a cart, simply to
stand against. I highly doubted I'd be buying enough
to fill a cart. Seriously, saying as I only had like
40 dollars in my wallet. I started my walk around the
store, casually looking at anything flashy that caught
my eye. I made my way over to the CD rack, and just
for fun looked in the "C" section.

"Wow," I said aloud. "I'll get to be in the same
section as Mariah. Well that'll be good for my sales,"


I thumbed through Mariah's CD's, just to make sure
there wasn't anything I didn't have. Occasionally, out
of town, I find special imports and things of that
nature. I say out of town, because Anson is seriously
lacking in good stores. The one big store we do have
is a K-Mart, and they're seriously lacking in the CD
Department. They had nothing I didn't already have, so
disappointed, I made my way from the department and
into the next one, health and beauty.

I walked through a few aisles and grabbed the stuff
I'd forgotten at home; hair gel, eye drops, and a
toothbrush. Toothbrushes came complimentary with my
hotel room, but I wasn't going to trust those generic
brands on my teeth. I needed my Oral B. 17 years
without a cavity was a record I was quite proud of. I
found the same toothbrush I had at home, and tossed it
into the cart. I then made my way to the next aisle,
the aisle I had been waiting for, sexual health. My
virginal eyes were amazed when I saw the different
varieties of condoms.

"Geez, who knew," I said aloud, picking up a random
box and reading it. "Magnum, for that special guy over
10 inches. Good lord, definitely don't need that big,"
I said, placing the box back on the hook. Thank God I
didn't need that big. If Doyle were that big, there
ain't no way he'd be taking his dick anywhere near my
skinny ass. He may break me in half as it is.

I continued to read the different boxes, but to
myself, in case there was someone standing around. I'd
seen someone burned on that before. I'd been shopping
with Ashley and her mom, and Mom was looking for
Boxers for her husband. She was walking around the
Men's Department, and asked aloud "If I were Men's
Underwear, where would I be?" The three of us burst
into laughter as a stockman came from behind us saying
"Third aisle on your left." That may not seem funny to
you, but in the moment, it was freaking hilarious.
Ashley and I could not stop laughing for the rest of
the day. I had no desire for something like that to
happen again, to me anyways. So I browsed around the
different boxes of condoms in silence, until I found
ones that suited me. "Dual Pleasure" sounded good to
me. So I tossed the box into the cart and made my way
a few feet down to the lube. I actually knew what I
was looking for in this case, and grabbed a tube of KY
Jelly, and tossed it into the cart. I made a hasty
exit from the aisle as an elderly woman made her way
into the aisle. I really didn't feel like watching an
old woman shop for sex items.

After I left Health and Beauty, I made my way past
everything else and into the junk food section. Like
the lube, I knew exactly what I wanted in this case
too. I searched around until I found a tube of Ranch
Pringles, and lucky I found them when I did, as there
was only one can left. I snatched it up quickly and
continued on my search for the missing piece to my
junk food fest, Oreo cookies. They were in the next
aisle, so I snatched up a bag and made my way to the
checkout.

I was laughing at myself in my head as I loaded my
items onto the counter. Hair gel, eye drops, a
toothbrush, condoms, KY jelly, Oreo's, and Ranch
Pringles. What a freak I must look like buying this
stuff at 4:00 A.M. The cashier was chuckling lightly
as she scanned the items.

"Looks like someone plans on having a good time
tonight," She said, giving me a suggestive wink.

"You might say that," I replied, laughing slightly at
the wink she'd given me.

She laughed, and told me the total for my goods. I
paid her and grabbed the bags from the counter. As I
turned to walk away, she spoke once more.

"You have fun sugar. Whomever you're going home to
will be a mighty lucky girl,"

"Thanks," I laughed lightly, inside I was laughing
like crazy. "I'll be sure to tell her that,"

I walked out of the store, and as soon as I was
outside, burst into laughter. I could just see myself
telling Doyle right now: "Guess what honey, some crazy
old cashier at this store in Dallas said you were a
lucky girl because you get to fuck me." God, just the
thought of that was too funny. I'd hate to see how I'd
laugh if I actually said it. I could barely cease my
laughing on the walk back to the hotel. But as I
entered the lobby, I ceased it completely and walked
to the elevator in complete silence. I hoped no one
saw me, I didn't feel like explaining to Jessica why I
went to a store at 4 am. I was able to make my way
back to my room in complete silence, without running
into anyone. Once I was in, I tossed my bag onto the
bed, and quickly tore into the Pringles. I pressed
play once more on my demo, and began to munch on my
Pringles as I listened to myself sing "Never Too Far"
for about the 7th time that night.

* * *

I was awoken early the next morning by the shrill
ringing of a telephone. I inched my way over the bag
of Oreo's and to the phone on the nightstand, and
picked it up to hear dial tone. It was then I realized
that the ringing I was hearing was my cell phone. I
had it on that annoying ring to wake myself up in the
morning. I had a history of sleeping through my alarm
clock. I dreadfully inched out of the bed and walked
to my cell phone.

"Don't hang up," I said, expecting the phone to listen
I guess.

I dug into my pants pocket and produced my cell phone.
I flipped it open and hit talk. I had yet to glance at
a clock, so I had no idea who would be calling.

"Hello?" I said

"Ethan, its mom,"

Oh boy, I had been dreading this phone call. My mother
had been out of town when the fated meeting with
Jessica had occured. And I had played my Aunt Caitlyn
card to get permission to go. My mother had never been
one to encourage my music. As I said before, she
wanted me to have a "normal childhood." Well, I was 17
now, I think I had lived a normal childhood. It was
time to live my dream. I just seriously hoped my
mother wasn't going to stand in the way.

"Um, hi mom,"

"Your Aunt told me everything," She replied

"Mom, I couldn't turn this opportunity down. It's
Jessica Simpson and...." I started before she cut me
off.

"Ethan, will you shut up? I'm happy for you sweetie,"

That came as quite a shock. I completely expected this
conversation to turn into a huge arguement. Which
would end with her stomping my dreams yet again. I had
played the scene out several times in my head on the
drive to Dallas from Anson. I'd get home, tell my mom
what had happened. She'd get mad, then start to cry,
tell me she wanted me to have a normal childhood. Then
I'd get mad, tell her I'd already had one. She'd get
mad in return, and forbid me from doing anything
professionally until I was 18. Thank God things didn't
turn out like that. I could still barely believe I was
talking to MY mother.

"What?" I managed to say after a minute or so.

"I'm happy for you Ethan. You can't stay my baby
forever. I just want you to be happy,"

"I am happy mom. You know this is what I've always
wanted,"

"I do sweetie. I'm genuinely happy for you,"

Hearing those words brought so much joy to me. I had
always dreamed of a career in music. But I always
thought that career would damage my relationship with
my mother, because me being in music was the last
thing she wanted. I never thought in a million years
she'd ever support it. But here she was, doing just
that. I guess Ashley was right, I really did have the
World's Coolest Mom.

"So when are you coming home?" My mother asked,
breaking me from my daze.

"I should be home today," I replied, opening the
curtains on the balcony doors. Sun burst through the
windows, tinting the room with a yellow glow. I took
that as a good omen for my day to come.

"Well, I may not be here. But I can't wait to hear all
about everything,"

"Okay,"

"Talk to you later sweetie,"

"Love you,"

"Love you too,"

"Bye,"

"Bye,"

I switched off the phone and tossed it back in the
direction of the bed. I made my way onto the balcony
and marvelled at the amazing view. I still couldn't
believe I was in my very own penthouse suite. And on
top of that, Jessica Simpson was the one who got me
here. I don't think I'd ever really grasp that one.

After I spent 20 minutes or so on the balcony, I made
my way back inside and into the shower. As I began to
strip down, I was reminded of Doyle. The feelings of
our first night together came flooding back to me. I
could still feel his mouth on me. I could still taste
him on my tongue. But most importantly, I could still
feel the feelings I got when he told me he loved me.
My body was engulfed with such pleasure when I heard
those words. More pleasure than any orgasm could ever
give me. I loved that man so deeply, in such a short
amount of time. And there isn't a greater feeling in
this world than knowing those feelings were returned.

As I was stepping from the shower, I heard a knock
come at the door. I expected it to be Jessica, so I
slipped on the complimentary bathrobe and made my way
to the door. I opened the door, and instead of
Jessica, there stood a bellhop, who couldn't possibly
be any older than myself.

"Mr. Christiansen?" He asked.

"Yes?" I asked in reply.

"Ms. Simpson requests your presence for breakfast
poolside,"

"Okay, tell her I'll be down in like 10 minutes,"

"Will do sir,"

The bellhop flashed me a rather warm smile then
proceeded to walk back down the hall. I shut the door
and made my way back to the bathroom. I quickly
finished getting ready. I stared into the mirror for a
few seconds before I realized my eyes were still blue.
I walked back to the bed and grabbed my contacts from
my bag. I popped them in then slipped the case into my
pocket. I was now officially ready to face the world.
I grabbed my phone from the floor near the bed and
made my way downstairs.

* * *

"Ethan, my star!" Jessica yelled from the far side of
the pool as I entered the courtyard.

"Jessica, my angel!" I yelled back. Truths be told,
that's what I thought of her as.

As I sat down in the lounge chair next to her, a woman
approached me and asked me what I'd like for
breakfast. I wasn't all that hungry, so I ordered a
bowl of fresh fruit, with no sugar, and a grapefruit
juice. As the waitress left to get my food, Jessica
began to speak.

"I talked to my manager this morning," She said
plainly, sipping at her orange juice.

"Oh?"

"She's willing to take you on. I played her one song
from your demo, and she wanted you,"

"That's wonderful!" I exclaimed.

"Well, don't get too ahead of yourself. I haven't
talked to the head of the label yet. And even after I
do, it could take weeks to get everything cemented,"

"I've been waiting for this my whole life, a couple of
weeks won't be nothing,"

"That's good to hear. Because from where I sit, I can
guarantee they'll sign you. No record executive on
earth is stupid enough to pass you by,"

I laughed and thanked the waitress as she reappeared
with my food. I began to pick at my food as Jessica
relayed to me her signing with Columbia. Tommy
Motolla, arguably the smartest man ever in music had
signed her. But he was in prison now, for tampering
with artist's music, and buying his artists air play.
That wasn't a big surprise, why else would Jennifer
Lopez have been a star? Jessica assured me that the
new head wasn't crooked, and would "die for my voice."
I didn't care if he was crooked honestly, as long as
he signed me. He could buy me all the air play he
wanted, I wouldn't disagree. Like I said earlier, I
could be singing the Macarena, as long as I got to
hear myself on the radio.

The morning passed rather dully, for people who aren't
interested in the life story of Jessica Simpson. I
however was, so I enjoyed myself. But I won't bore you
with the details. After a nice lunch at a small little
restaurant called "Tanzone's", we boarded the limo and
started the drive back to Anson. Jessica continued to
tell me stories on the ride home. By the end of this
trip, I knew more about Jessica Simpson than any other
fan in history. But I liked the way she seemed so
comfortable with me. It was only a few days since we'd
known each other, but we both treated each other like
life long friends. I hoped, even once I became
"competition", that it was a friendship we could keep.


When we arrived in back in Anson, Jessica double
checked my personal information, like phone number,
address and stuff, so she could contact me herself
when she got word from the executives on my signing.
She assured me about five times that I'd get a
contract. I told her the truth, I didn't really care
if I was signed. She'd already made me the happiest
person alive. She hugged me and told me she'd be in
touch. I told her thank you for about the millionth
time in the past few days, and made my way into my
house. As soon as I got in, I immediately ran to the
stereo and popped my demo in. I could hardly believe I
was hearing myself. And as I sat and listened to
"Never Too Far" in length, I could hardly believe I
was able to hit that last note. But Jessica had said I
had the possibility for a 4-octave range, which is
even higher than what she herself has. I didn't really
believe her. A 4-octave range would put me an octave
below Mariah Carey. And I didn't think for even a
second I could EVER be that good. And I knew for
damned sure I could never hit half of those glass
shattering high notes she does. I was content to sing
in my normal range, and not try to stretch myself to
hit the high notes.

After I'd sat and listened to my entire demo, I pulled
it from the stereo, and made my way back to my
bedroom. I picked up the phone and dialed Doyle's
number. It was Thursday, so he shouldn't be at work. I
tapped my foot impatiently against the floor as I
listened to the phone ring. As I was just about to
hang up, someone answered.

"Is Doyle there?" I asked

"Yeah, hold on," The girl replied, setting the phone
down and yelling "Hey Ugly, the phone's for you,"
Whomever she was, must obviously be blind. Because
there is no way in hell anyone could say Doyle was
ugly.

Doyle eventually got to the phone, and answered with a
"Hey Gorgeous,"

"Hey, I'm home now," I replied sweetly.

"Thought you were gonna call when you were on your
way?" He asked in a joking tone.

"I was too busy learning the entire life story of
Jessica Simpson," I laughed, flicking my computer on.

He laughed for a second, then cleared his throat.
"Want me to come over?"

"Of course, I've missed you,"

"I missed you too," He replied quietly. "I'll be over
in a few,"

"Okay,"

"I love you,"

"Love you more," I joked

"Liar,"

"Bye babe," I laughed.

"Bye,"

I hung up the phone and placed it back onto the base.
I clicked around for a few seconds on my computer then
inserted two CDs. One into the player, and one into
the burner. I clicked OK then got up from the desk and
plopped down onto the bed. I was once again smiling
uncontrollably. Just hearing his voice gave me little
butterflies. I wondered for a second if I had the same
effect on him. I was pretty sure I knew the answer.
After all, he'd said "I love you" first. And I knew he
meant it just as much as I did. Just a glimpse into
his sparkling green eyes filled me with love. I don't
think there was any way I'd ever be able to look at
his beautiful face and not smile. I didn't care if
everything feel through with the record company, as
long as I still had Doyle, I knew I'd be all right.

I was still staring at my ceiling as I heard the knock
at the front door. I made a mental note to write
something on the ceiling, so it wouldn't be so weird
when I stared at it for so long. I hopped to my feet
and rushed to the front door. I opened it up and was
greeted with a white rose.

"Hey sexy," Doyle said, handing me the rose then
kissing me lightly on the lips. "I missed you,"

"I missed you too," I said as I shut the door behind
him. I smelled the rose for a second, and was reminded
I had never told him White Roses were my favorite.
"Wait a sec, how did you know white roses were my
favorite?"

"I am related to your best friend," He laughed,
looking over the DVDs on top of the Television.

"Good point," I said, walking into the kitchen to look
for a vase. Doyle followed behind me and took a seat
at the bar.

He watched in silent amusement as I tore apart the
kitchen looking for a vase. My quest proved
unsuccessful, so I settled on an empty bottled water.
I filled it up with water and deposited the flower
into it. I began my walk back to my bedroom and
motioned for Doyle to follow me with my hand. He
grasped my hand, and followed quickly behind me.

I put the flower next to my desk, and noticed the CD
was done burning. I popped it out, and put it into an
empty case. I then handed it to Doyle with a huge
smile on my face.

"What's this?" He asked.

"My demo,"

"I wanna hear it," He said excitedly

I just nodded and ejected my copy from my computer and
took it to my stereo. I popped it in and pressed play.
I went and sat down next to Doyle and stared at him as
"Never Too Far" started to play. I saw his eyes light
up as my voice began. He reached over and grasped my
hand in his, and just stared at the stereo. He stayed
like that until the end of the song, when his jaw
almost dropped at the last note. After the song was
over, he leaned over and kissed me. Our lips touched
for minutes, our tongues writhing against each other
until he broke the kiss.

"You are so amazing Ethan. These songs are really
going to take you to the next level,"

As he uttered those words, a lightbulb went on in my
head (Or my pants, depends on how you look at it.) Our
relationship had already experienced alot in its first
week of life. But there was one last level for it
travel. The level of intercourse. I'd been thinking
about it since our first night together. That was why,
in one of my many hours spent awake in my hotel room
in Dallas, I had snuck out and walked to the 24 Hour
Department Store and bought the necessities. I paused
within my head to make sure I was really ready for it.
I mean, Doyle was pretty big. And it was a pretty big
step to be taking after only a week. But I loved Doyle
so much. I wanted to be one with him, in body and in
soul. I knew right then, I wanted to do this. I wanted
Doyle inside me.

"There's something else that can take me to the next
level," I said, as seductively as I could possibly be.


"What's that?" He asked.

I paused momentarily to think about how pure and
innocent minded Doyle really was. I don't think he had
a cell in his body capable of thinking sexual. I, on
the other hand naturally thought in that direction. I
made a mental note to stop with the sexual subleties
and get straight to the point with Doyle from now on.
But as sexual as mind was, I couldn't bring myself to
say it out loud. So I leaned over and whispered my
intentions into Doyle's ear. I watched with
fascination as his eyes went from curiosity, to
excitement, to concern all in the brief time I was
whispering in his ear.

"Are you sure?" He asked, a look of concern stretched
across his beautiful face. "I mean, it's a pretty big
step,"

"I love you Doyle," I said, grasping his hand in mine.
"I'm sure,"

"Don't we need like, stuff?" He asked, laughing
nervously and dropping his eyes from mine.

"I have everything we need," I replied, lifting his
chin with my finger.

Doyle smiled brightly at me, then leaned over and
brought his lips once more to mine. His tongue quickly
entered my mouth, and I felt our tongues softly caress
one another. The nervous apprehension of our first
night together was no where to be seen, as Doyle
softly pushed me back against the bed. His hand
immediately found the buttons of my shirt and
unfastened them. He pushed the fabric from my chest
and began to graze his hands slowly across my chest as
our tongue battle continued. I shuddered lightly under
his touch, getting a quiet giggle from Doyle, but
never breaking out lip lock. His kisses started
drifting slowly down my neck as his hands too began to
drift lower. His hand stopped at my crotch, and he
began to stroke me through the fabric of my jeans. I
moaned out loudly and gripped the sheets in my hands.
He then brought his hands to my jeans, and unbuttoned
them and pulled them down before I had the chance to
object (Like I would've anyways.) I now lay before my
boyfriend in nothing but a pair of silver silk boxers.


"You are so beautiful Ethan," He said softly. "I don't
deserve you," He said, nuzzling his face into my neck.


"You do deserve me," I replied, grazing my fingers
through his hair "With all of my mood swings and
murderous tendencies,"

He lifted his face from my neck and looked at me with
amusement in his eyes. I stuck my tongue out and he
giggled at me. I pulled him down and brought my lips
to his. He let out a soft growl as I flipped him over
on the bed and straddled him. I could feel his
erection pressing insistently against my ass as I
began to suck at his neck. I adjusted myself, and
began to grind my own erection into his as I continued
to suck at his neck. I brought my hands to the
waistband of his jeans, and yanked his t-shirt from
them. He sat up only momentarily to remove his shirt,
then pulled me back down on top of him. I dove right
onto his nipples with my tongue, causing him to moan
out loudly. I expertly undid his jeans and removed my
mouth from his chest for only a brief second while I
removed them, boxers and all. I then brought my hand
down to his swollen 7 inches. He shuddered under my
grasp, and thrust up into my hand. I continued to jerk
him slowly while I massaged his nipples with my
tongue. He was squirming underneath me, and moaning
out loudly each time I jerked upward. I continued to
jerk him for about five minutes then got up from the
bed. I walked over to my bag and grabbed the condoms
and lube from it. I walked back over to the bed and
placed them in Doyle's hands.

He pulled me on top of him and returned his lips to
mine with a passion. He flipped me over slowly onto my
back and positioned himself between my legs. I watched
with anticipation as he unscrewed the cap of lube and
squirted some into his hand. He pushed my boxers
quickly to the floor, then resumed his position. I
flinched at the cold feeling of the lube pressing
against my ass, but urged Doyle to continue. He
happily obliged, and slid his finger cautiously inside
me. I moaned softly at the sensation. He moved his
finger around inside me, making me squirm from the
pleasure. I then felt him slide another finger in me
slowly. He moved his fingers around inside me slowly,
until he hit my spot. I moaned out loudly and clenched
my ass around his fingers. He looked up at me with a
look of satisfaction on his face and continued to
press lightly against my spot. At that point, I lost
all dignity.

"Please Doyle," I begged. "I need you inside me,"

I almost laughed as he jumped instantly to his feet
and ripped a condom from the package. My hole was
quivering with anticipation as he slipped the condom
slowly onto his throbbing 7 inches. He then squirted
some of the lube into his hand and rubbed it onto his
sheathed cock. He then lifted my legs onto his
shoulders and placed himself at my opening.

"Tell me if it hurts," He whispered softly.

I didn't say anything but nodded and braced myself for
him. I wanted to scream as the spongy head of his cock
pressed past my opening. But the sheer desire was
enough for me to hold on. He pressed inch after inch
into me until I felt his balls hit my ass.

"God...Ethan....You're....so.....hot," He murmured,
out of breath.

"Fuck me," I begged once more.

He leaned down and brought his lips sensuously to mine
as he began to thrust slowly into me. The feelings
that began surging through my body were enough to send
me into a pleasure induced coma. Our first night
together paled in comparison to the feelings I was
receiving right now. Doyle began grunting and moaning
at the same time as his thrusting speed began to
increase. I was in utter heaven, moaning out his name
with each thrust. I felt his hand slip slowly down my
chest and grab my until now, neglected cock. He began
to jerk sporadically, until he was able get in sync
with his thrusting. I was officially in ecstacy. My
eyes were jammed shut from the sheer pleasure shooting
through out me. I continued to moan out Doyle's name,
and clench my ass around his cock with each thrust in.
His grunts were becoming louder, his thrusts pushing
deeper into me each time. Before I even knew what
happened, I felt orgasm over take me, and I felt my
cum spill over his hand. Doyle continued his thrusting
for only seconds more before he looked directly into
my eyes and spoke.

"I love you Ethan,"

"I love you too," I replied.

I then felt his last thrust enter me, and his cock
pulse as it shot load after load into the condom.
Doyle hissed slightly as he pulled his softening cock
from my ass. He yanked the condom off and deposited it
into the trash can by my bed. He then lay back on the
bed and pulled me to him. Our lips met softly, then
separated as I lay my head onto his chest.

"I love you Doyle," I murmured, nuzzling against his
chest.

"I love you too, more than you'll ever know," He
replied.

Those were the last words that were spoken that night.
Doyle fell quickly asleep, but I could understand
that, he was utterly amazing. I lay on his chest for
hours, just listening to his rhythmic breathing. If it
were at all possible, I felt as if I loved him even
more now. He was the single most perfect being on this
Earth. And he was all mine. It was in that moment, as
I reflected upon the events of the past days, I came
upon a realization. Jessica Simpson was not my angel.
My angel, was Doyle.