OF LOVE AND CHANCE
A Chance To Settle
a story by:
This is a
story about, well,
love and chance. It is for the most part, a work of pure fiction,
though some of the situations discussed are drawn from life experiences
(particularly the romantic ones). Though not in the beginning,
this story will eventually contain sexual acts between consenting
adults. Gay characters have gay sex, so if this bothers you, or
if it is illegal to read such materials due to your age or where you
live, then please do not read further. All copy rights are held
by the author, so please do not duplicate, print, alter, or resubmit (or
anything else I may have missed ) this
story without first obtaining written
permission from the author.
Further notes: This
story will address several social issues in a
perspective in which you may or may not agree. It is also a story
centered around life and love between friends, family, and partners,
along with romance, and it is not intended to be a jerk-off
story. There are spiritual and paranormal themes which affect the
lives of the characters. Finally, the story is told in the
various points of view of the characters involved. (To make this
process easier, each character's story is distinguished by a specific
color and font style dedicated to that character.)
This is my first attempt at
writing fiction of any kind. If you
have any comments, ideas, suggestions, etc., I would love to hear
them. I have greatly enjoyed the comments I have received thus far and
wish to thank you all for taking the time to send them.
Please contact me via firstname.lastname@example.org
I was in the meadow, the one from all my other dreams, only this time,
there was a stream flowing by one end. Kanawha and I were wading
in that stream, as the cool waters trickled by. I was lost,
gazing in the sapphire windows to his soul. The love he felt for
me shined brightly, like a blazing inferno of passion. He gently
caressed my cheek, bringing me back from my trance to awareness. His
smile illuminated his handsome face, as the tips of his fingers ever so
delicately traced the features of my own. The slightest movement
of his hand brought forth tingling sensations that pulsed throughout my
So very slowly, his lips met mine, grazing against one another with the
lightest of contact. Methodically, his lips teased my own,
leaving me yearning for their presence. As the hunger within me
grew, the kiss became more passionate. Gently, he tugged on my
lower lip, catching it between his own. I parted my lips, and the
sweetness of his tongue placidly penetrated me. Soon, our tongues
danced in the natural rhythm of our love, our desires for one another
growing more intense with each passing moment.
Ploddingly, his fingers crawled like spiders down my neck, shoulders,
and spine, as my own hands, which had rested around his waste, now
climbed their way desperately up his back. Softly, his fingers circled
the small of my back, as mine clutched tightly to the back of his head,
drawing him closer to me. His hands glided carefully over my
lower cheeks and hips, then lightly stroked up my sides. Reaching
my shoulders, they would once again trickle down my spine, creating a
repeating pattern. Peaked with arousal, my body shuddered
under every touch.
Slowly, my lips descended from his mouth, grazing along his strong
jawline to his neck. There, I softly kissed and suckled. I
raised my lips to the slightest of contact and breathed in, creating a
cool stream of air, causing his body to tremble. My hands flowed
down his neck and shoulders, where they delicately stroked the belly of
his triceps. The slightest groan escaped my lovers lips, as my
roaming fingers continued their exploration of his body.
As my fingers titillated his hardened brown nubs, he grabbed me tightly
around the waist with one arm, drawing me upwards. His other hand
nabbed me by the nape, pulling my head back as he savoringly licked his
way up my throat. Once again our lips were joined in an
animalistic kiss. The hardness of his bountiful manhood pressed
firmly against my own. My lover's hips slowly gyrated, creating a
pleasant friction between our engorged members. My moans were
silenced by his invading tongue, as he continued to stroke our bodies
against one another. Our skin heated as we glided flesh to flesh,
drawing the fires of our love into a blaze of unyielding passion.
Our rhythm increased as our breathing became more shallow and
erratic. Our loins screamed out for release. Slowly, the
undeniable sensation built. Steadily, the intensity
climbed. I gazed again into my lovers eyes, knowing I was on the
brink of no return. Basking in the love we shared, we exploded
I awoke encased tightly in my lovers hold, pressed firmly against
him. Our deep, passionate kiss silenced the anguishing growls of
pleasure as we both pulsated in climactic release. The kiss
became less animalistic and more gentle as the effects of afterglow
settled upon us. As consciousness came to me, I realized we had
once again shared our dreams. He and I were both just so tired
from the long night, we quickly fell asleep once we got Chance into bed.
lying on my bed, both still in our pajamas, though they were soaked
with perspiration and our essence. I slowly broke the kiss and
gently ran my fingers through the hair of my beloved. He just
smiled that winning smile of his, and my heart melted once again.
A comfortable silence fell as we watched one another.
Finally, Kanawha broke the silence. "You know, I could get used to waking up
like this. Talk about your five-star service." he smiled.
"Really? Hmm. Well, seeing
as how I was working to fulfill a fantasy, in a dream no less, I figure
I at least deserve one or two more stars than that." I smiled.
"Granted. But then again,
exactly who's fantasy was it?" he shot back.
"Well, it had to be yours. I
would never be so
animalistic." I jested.
"Oh, so you say. But as I recall
it, I was being gentle. You were the one groping like a mad man."
he said, flashing me his evil grin.
He had me at that. I just blushed and laughed. "I was kind of hoping you would not
remember that part."
He ran his fingers across my cheek and through my hair. "What? Are you crazy? That was
the best part. Feeling how much I turned you on... seeing your
desire for me burning in your eyes... knowing how passionately you
wanted to express your love for me... well, it completely had me going."
He laughed. "And, it is nothing
to be embarrassed about. You want me, and I love that, almost as
much as I love wanting you. Hell, you're the only one who has
ever wanted me. Why? I have no idea, but I am thrilled that
"Somehow, Mr. Darkstorm, I seriously
doubt you have never been the object of another's affections. I'm
ecstatic that you didn't accept their affections, but I am still sure
that you left a trail of hormonally charged admirers in your wake."
I said, kissing his cheek. "As
to why I want you, well I may just have to reconsider, seeing as you
only gave me a five-star rating." I giggled.
He wrestled himself on top of me, interlocking his fingers with my
own. "There are just not enough
stars in the heavens to express how much your love means to me... be it
in a dream or otherwise." Then, he softly kissed me again.
He broke the kiss and smiled. "You
know, this dream sharing thing has its advantages! But, I've been
thinking. If it was that good in a dream, just imagine what it
will be like
"You are such the horn dog!" I
jibed. "Hehehe! But, I
have to admit, that thought has crossed my mind a few times since we
"We have all the time in the world to
explore that, my love. But right now, I am feeling a bit
sticky. What say we get
cleaned up and go check on Chance?"
With that, Kanawha stood and grabbed me up in his arms, carrying me to
the bathroom, where he gently stood me on my feet. "Your not gonna get all shy on me now, are
you?" He joked, remembering our conversation about public
As I stood there, it was just like being the late bloomer in junior
high school all over again. My cheeks burned from my all-to-shy
awkwardness. Kanawha just smirked and shook his head. "Love, after all we have been through,
don't you know I love YOU? Nothing will change that, ever.
So, you don't have to be afraid." I was still a bit
hesitant about it, and my love took notice. "Look, if you want, we can take a shower
separately. I won't have any hard feelings. Honestly, so
long as I have you in my life, that is all that matters to me."
"You are so full of it, you know
that?" I quipped. "Alright,
but I swear, one word... one gesture... one smirk... and you will be
showering alone in cold water for a VERY long time."
He just snickered, and I began undressing. Heaven help me, but I
was just so embarrassed. And, his watching me was not helping
matters one bit. Just as I removed my boxer briefs and was baring
it all, Kanawha expressed that look... the one that traumatizes you
into feeling so inadequate. Humiliating flashbacks of the boys locker
room played through my mind, and I was ready to bolt when he
spoke. "Killian, love, I don't
know what your hang up is, but you have NOTHING to be ashamed about!"
"Your not disappointed?"
I asked self-consciously.
"Well, let's just say that you are
even better than I imagined, and I have a great imagination." he
enthused. He looked me up and down, mostly on the
down...hehehe. "I can honestly
say I am most pleasantly surprised." he smiled.
I felt like I had a third-degree sunburn, I blushed so much. But,
at least it was in a good way this time. As he gawked at me, I
felt a bit more confident. "Well,
as long as you want to compliment me, then please, go on." I
smiled, knowing that toothy grin of mine was plastered all over my face.
He just silently giggled as he began undressing. I have to admit
that I was doing my share of gawking as I took in the sights of my
beloved. When he stepped out of his underwear, I was rather
happy. I just took it all in, memorizing every line and curve as
he blushed. Finally, I tore my eyes away from his beautiful body.
"Well Son of BIG Horse, you ready
for our shower?" I quipped.
"Some people are such perv's."
He replied, rolling his eyes as he started the shower.
"And that upsets you how?" I
"Not in any way I can think of at the
moment." he laughed, taking me into his arms. Softly, he
serenaded me with some of the song he had melted me with just hours
"I love you, Killian Anderson
"And I you, my love, forever and a
day." We entered the shower, locked in another bliss-filled
kiss. And, in those early morning hours, we reenacted our
dream... a couple of times in fact... just to be sure... and, it was
way better in reality!
was the biggest things I had ever saw in my life! And, I
just wondered how strong this Hela must be to carry them boobs of hers
around ever day. Shoot, I just wondered how she could stand up
straight with 'em. Seems like she would fall over or somethin'
they was so big. When she turned 'round, I could see how, 'cause
her butt stuck out just as far as them boobs did, and it was far let me
tell ya'. She was tall too, not as tall as Daddy, but not to far
from it. The rest of her was a little bit fat. 'That ain't nice Chance!' I said to
myself. Then I got to thinkin', she wouldn't really be fat if it
weren't for them boobs, her butt, and her belly. But I's wrong,
'cause her legs and arms were kinda big too.
She was real pretty though. She had these eyes that barely had
any color to 'em at all, they's so light green. Her skin was'
bout the color of this ol' baseball glove I used to have. I'd found it in the trash one day,
thinkin' I might play with some of the fella's at the park. They
wouldn't play or talk with me or nothin' though, so I just thowed it
away later. Wasn't doin' me no good no how. Her hair
was pulled up on her head, and she had all these braids a hangin' down
like lots of spider legs. Some of 'em was a purple-red color, but
most of 'em was black. Her chin just kinda hung down on her neck,
and she had lots of chains 'round it. She had lots of earrings
too. Her clothes was kinda tight, but I reckon with boobs and a
butt that big, they just gotta be tight. She had a pretty smile
a nice voice, lots of makeup on, and she had long fingernails that were
real red. She squatted down when she talked to me, and I thought
that was nice of her. 'Somethin'
special 'bout her I like.' I's thinkin', and I just smiled at
her. I could tell we's gonna be friends. Nobody never did tell me what dildo
Boy there sure was a
lot of 'em. My dads had lots of friends. I's excited to see
'em boys Ethan and Shaft. I figured we could do stuff together
and all, 'cause they looked like they was 'bout my age.
That mouthy girl was nice lookin', but she was pickin' at Daddy, which
I didn't like none too much. Daddy showed her though, and he sang
a song for me and Dad. Hela sang with him, and she sounded like
an angel. I got to thinkin' that maybe she was an angel, cause I
just knew there was somethin' real special 'bout her.
After they sang, me, Dad, and Daddy went to bed. Dad had two
rooms. One had a bed in it and stuff like that. The other
one had a couch and a place for writin'. There was a bathroom in
between 'em. He told me I could pick out my own room tomorrow and
put me in his bed. He and Daddy made the couch into a bed, which
I thought was real neat, and that's where they slept. They
said prayers with me and then talked with me a few minutes, but I went
to sleep on 'em.
I slept real good in that bed. Boy, it was so nice having one, a
lot better'n a box on that ol' rooftop I was sleepin' on before.
They woke me up, though. They's makin' a lot of noise in that
and I figured I knew what them two was doin', so I just put my face in
the pillow and laughed real hard. They finished what they was
doin' and came in a little later. I smiled at 'em and said, "You guys must really like getting all
cause you sure was makin' a racket in there!" They both
just turned real red and I laughed at 'em. My dads both
on me and tickled me silly after that.
Daddy pulled me up on his lap and hugged me, kissin' me on the
forehead. Then Dad and him told me what all we was gonna do
today. We was gonna go shoppin' and get me more stuff, which I
was all excited about. I had to get my hair cut, but I guessed it
would be OK. We had to meet that social worker and go to get me
signed up for school. I didn't think I was gonna like goin' to no
school again, but it wasn't no use, cause Dad was not givin' in
none. There was some other stuff they said we'd do, but I was
still thinkin' 'bout having to go to that school and didn't pay no
attention to 'em.
We went downstairs to the kitchen, and Hela was in there cookin'.
She was singin' some pretty song I don't reckon I had heard
before. She turned 'round and smiled at me. I just run up
to her and hugged her, don't really know why, but I just felt like
doin' it. She hugged me back real tight, sayin' "Well, I don't know what I've done to
deserve this, but I sure won't complain." Then, she run
her hands in my hair and asked me, "So,
how did our little guy sleep? Those Dad's of yours didn't keep
you up all night did they? I'll swat them good if they did."
I just smiled and giggled. Then I told her, "No. I slept real good. But
they made an awful lot of noise in that bathroom this mornin' and woke
me up." Both my dads just turned real red, and me and Hela
laughed at 'em.
"And to think I was fixing grits for
my little man's man!" she said, walkin' up to 'em both and
grabbin' them by their ears. "Shame
on you for waking up my little guy!" Then, she hugged 'em
both real tight. "Oh, babies, I
am so happy for you!" She started waivin' her hand in
her eyes. "I think I'm gonna
cry!" And she did too, while she kissed 'em both on the
cheek. It was funny, cause they both had red lip marks on 'em
"Did you mention grits?" Daddy
She just smiled. " I know you
southern gentlemen like your
grits. But trust me baby, your gonna
Daddy looked really excited, but they didn't look none to good to
me. Dad whispered in my ear, "Its
OK, son. I think they are kinda gross myself." He
Daddy and Hela both looked real shocked, and Daddy said, "I cannot believe this. I find my
soul mate and he does not like grits?"
Dad shook his head and told him, "Sorry,
love, but ewe... Those things are just nasty." Hela
smacked him on the butt with her spoon and told him to get out of her
kitchen, but we knew she didn't mean it or nothin'.
We talked for a bit, then Hela asked if I would go get everybody up for
breakfast. Daddy said he would go with me, 'cause he wanted to
wake up Ethan and that mouthy Jena. So, we head up
the steps and knock on the door. It took a while, but Shaft
finally answered the door. Ethan was behind him, and they was
wrapped up in towels. They
was in the shower, 'cause they was drippin' wet.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
Daddy growled at Shaft. I's
glad Dad didn't here him, cause he would have whacked Daddy again for
Shaft must've been thinkin' he was talkin' bout all the scars he had on
his chest, cause he started to put his arms up over them. "Killian tells me what good people you are,
and what do you do? You molest my poor little brother!
Ethan, buddy, did he hurt you?" Daddy said. Shaft looked
relieved and started laughing. He even took his arms down from
all those scars. I
didn't stare at them or nothin', cause I could tell he didn't want
nobody too, but I felt real bad for him. I didn't know what they's
from, and I didn't ask nobody.
"He made me do it! I didn't want
to, but he made me!" Ethan said, then he laughed. "What are you doing barging in on us
anyway, big guy? Shouldn't you be... well, you know... with Kal."
"Perv!" Daddy said to him and
they moved out of the way so we could come in. "Hela told us to get everyone up for
breakfast... and she is making grits, too... special for me, if you can
believe that." Shaft looked shocked over that for some
reason. Then Daddy started sniffin'. "Guy, this room so reeks of sex!"
he said smiling. I
noticed it smelled kinda funny, but I
smelled worse I reckon.
"Oh, like Kal's room
doesn't!" Ethan said back at 'im, all smart like.
Daddy shook his head. "Nope.
Our room smells clean and fresh."
"That's cause they did it in the
bathroom. They woke me up, they's makin' so much noise."
I told 'em, and both the boys laughed with me. Daddy just turned
real red again, but he did laugh.
"Well, son, let's go get the rest of
them up." Daddy says to me. "Let's wake up that mouthy girl next!"
he said like he was sneakin' somethin' from a store.
"They were still in the music room
last we saw of them." Shaft said while Ethan
laughed. "They were asleep on
the couch when we went to bed."
"Thanks, guy. And for the
record, you guys make a wonderful couple. I can sorta tell what
you feel about each other, and I am so happy for you both. But,
we'll talk about that later." Daddy said, and then we went to
get that mouthy girl back for pickin' on Daddy!
He smacked his big ol' hand down on that couch and both of 'em jumped
up scared to death. Then, Daddy growled at them too. "You know, in the south, we have a code of
honor. You have to get permission from the head of the family
before you mess around with his little sister. So, you are in for
a big ass beating, Jew!" He looked so scared, but Jena
just laughed and came up huggin' Daddy.
"Oh, thank God! Stormy, your
back!" Then she giggled. "
There for a minute, I thought I was gonna have to start calling you RAINBOW or something." Daddy just
hugged her tight. 'I guess if
he likes her, then she's OK. But, she best not pick on my Daddy
again!' I thought. Daddy grabbed Jew up off the
couch and hugged him too. Then, he looked 'em both over and said,
"You guys looked all cute snuggled up
there. I hope everything works out for you both. Any guy
that can make this ol' girl happy must be one hell of a man, so you
have my vote."
He just smiled at Daddy and put his arm
around Jena. "Thanks."
"OK, son. Let's get the rest of
them up." and we did. Daddy let me wake up Mic and
Cole, and they both hugged me, thankin' me for tellin' them 'bout
breakfast. Cole even kissed me on the cheek and I was all
embarrassed. She sure was pretty, though. Cole said she
would wake up Roe 'cause he had some stuff in his room I prob'ly
shouldn't see. Daddy just laughed and shook his head. Then,
Daddy and I went back downstairs.
Soon, we was all eatin' breakfast, and man can that Hela cook. I
knew there was somethin' special 'bout her, and her bein' good at
cookin' wasn't it, but I was still happy that she was. We had all
kinds of stuff. Them grits were none to good, if ya ask me, but
I ate 'em 'cause Daddy seemed to be likin' 'em so much. I guessed
ate worse things before, so I just swallowed hard and drank a lot of
juice. I think Dad knew I didn't really like 'em grits, 'cause he
winked at me and giggled, makin' this funny face when Daddy wasn't
payin' us no mind.
Anyhow, while we ate, Dad and Daddy told them all 'bout their night,
and I told 'em about it too, 'specially 'bout Daddy tellin that woman
off from the store. Hela said she was likin' Daddy more and more,
but she was a little mad at that woman, Betty. They told 'em what
all we had to do today.
Shaft whispered to Ethan a minute. Then, he asked my dads if they
go shoppin' with us. He said that they wanted to take me so I
could surprise 'em both with my new stuff. I thought it would be
real fun, 'cause I got to hang out with 'em boys some. I felt
it'd be nice to have some friends. I's glad when they both said
Hela said when we got done shoppin' and stuff, that she'd cut my hair
for me. I thought that would be better'n somewhere else so I told
her sure thing. She said while we's gone, she'd look through some
books to show me to see what I wanted my hair to look like. I was
kinda excited about it then.
Jena said she wanted to go to the school with us. She had
somethin' goin' on up in her head I could tell, but she said she'd tell
us 'bout it later. Then, she told Ethan and Mic she was gonna
need them to do some stuff with her later on but didn't say what.
They both said they'd help.
Cole told Dad to call her when we finished talkin' with that social
worker. She said she had a friend we could go see if we needed
to. I had no idea what she was talkin 'bout then, so I just
to Jew. He was nice too, and he said we could maybe go to the
park later and play some ball. That sounded like lots of fun to
me, and I hugged 'im for bein' so nice and all. He just laughed
and told my dads he was keepin' me.
Roe said if I picked out what room I wanted, he and Jew would get to
workin' on it for me. We went lookin' through them, and I picked
out one between Dad's and Jew's. Hela's was across from mine,
too, so I knew I'd like that room. Roe had me pick out colors for
it, and I picked blue and red. I guess I just like them colors,
and Jew said he liked 'em too. Then Roe said he'd tell Dad what
all they's gonna need. I was so excited, 'cause I was gonna
have my own room in this big ol' house!
That Chance was really
something else. He was so excited on the ride to the mall, and I
just had to admire his deep appreciation for even the most simple of
things. I found him to be rather comical, and I had a fondness
growing for him. There was something quite special about
him. He was uncomplicated, maybe is a good way to describe
him. And, he somehow made me feel inspired. The way he
said things was adorable, and the fact that he
thought Ethan and I were his age, well it just made him endearing to
me. Ethan and I had laughed about that last night, but we decided
to just let it be. Ethan felt his seeing us as peers would help
Chance adjust better, and I had to agree with my Ethan.
Lord, thank you for that! One thing I had given up all hope of
finding was someone to call my own. And there he was, sitting
beside me, smiling and laughing while he gently stroked my hand.
I loved the way his cat-like eyes would light up and almost dance when
he smiled. The way each little crease around his eyes formed as
his cheeks drew up with the corners of his mouth and those big white
teeth of his illuminated his face, well, it was
breathtaking. The way he would nervously fidget, like
stroking his hair behind his ear or picking at invisible skin along his
cuticles, it just made him so charming. He even made this slight
whistling sound through his nose as he slept.
"What, babe? I'm sorry, I was
just thinking about something." I said, as Ethan snapped me back
"I said, I think it would be fun to
take Chance to the arcade. Maybe we can do that to break up the
monotony of shopping." Ethan said with that incredible
voice of his. It just
made me tingle to hear him speak. To
sing, well that was entirely beyond words to describe.
"Anything you guys want to do is fine
with me. This is Chance's big day, so I think we should make it a
blast!" I enthused. Ethan's love had changed
me. It made me feel whole again, as if I had a new lease on
life. Whether my time be short or not, I was going to make the
most of every second with my lover.
"I ain't never played none of 'em
before really, but I watched some 'em boys play 'em. They played
this one game where they was a cuttin' each other up with swords, and
kinds of blood and stuff was just shootin' out all over the
place. Course, it was only in the game. None of that blood
was on the floor or nothin' like that." Chance shined as
he told his story, and he told it with his whole body. His eyes,
his hands, everything coordinated together to express his
excitement. Ethan and I just smiled, knowing this would be one
day he would remember forever.
"Now, I don't know about all this
blood and guts being such a good idea." Kal said, winking at
Ethan and I.
"Oh, Dad. Please! Can we
please play just one game of it? That's all. Just one game,
I promise. Please!" Kal just laughed as he pretended
Kanawha snickered and looked at us all through the rear view
mirror. Somehow, he
looked funny driving the van. "Well, if you promise not to beat Ethan too
badly, then I guess it will be fine. He gets really mad when he
looses, you know."
Ethan smacked Kanawha on the back of the head. "You are such a lier. And how would
you know, anyway? I always beat your a... butt." He
corrected himself as I poked him in the ribs. "Face it. If anyone is the sore
looser in our house, it is you. But, you would think after all
these years of loosing to me, you would be better at it by now."
"Son, did you hear that? OK
then, Son, you beat Ethan as much as you want to. Don't take it
easy on him at all. He so deserves to get his ass beat.
Ouch!... Sorry Love. It just slipped." Kanawha cowed
Kal pinched his arm for his language.
Somehow, I imagined that in fifty years, he would still be correcting
Kanawha in this way. That thought brought laughter to me, and as
I burst out, everyone just looked at me like I were crazy or
something. "Just a mental image
of you two in your seventies," I explained, "Kanawha cursing, and you slapping him
silly." At least they all found humor in it.
"I bet your guys room will still stink
like ol' sex when you are a hundred!" Chance shot.
Ethan turned bright red, and I just laughed, praying he was right about
cried. "What was that for?"
"Like I even have to ask where he
picked that up." Kal wryly stated.
"Son, are you not gonna take up for
your poor ol' Daddy?" Kanawha joked.
Chances eyes opened wide and his smile burst across his face. "I ain't stupid! Dad will just whack
me, too!" I
swear, that boy just looked so much like both of his dads. He had
so many of their mannerisms, as well. He was definitely carved
out by God to be the son of Kal and Kanawha.
The laughter and banter continued as we slowly crept through the
traffic and made our way to the mall. Chance was revved up with
energy, but then got really quiet. Kanawha turned to him quickly,
"And before you even ask, there will
not be any problems with you going into the stores. But, just in
case, if someone even looks at you funny, you come and get me.
I'll take care of them." He then turned to Kal, I suppose
expecting to be corrected.
Kal just smiled and said, "Today, I
am the one who concedes. It's your ballgame coach."
He kissed his big man on the cheek. "I think you are doing a fine job getting
our little player ready. You could watch the language a little,
but... that is just part of who you are, and I love who you
are. And, I think our son really loves it when you are the real you. Honestly, I do,
too. It can be a bit shocking, sometimes, like with Betty..."
he paused, collecting his thoughts, "I
guess what I am trying to say is that I was wrong in trying to correct
you. He is our son and I know you only have his best interest at
heart. I was also wrong because I was trying to make you into
someone else. I love you for who and what you are, and I don't
want to change that. So, I apologize."
"Really?" Kanawha asked
perplexedly, looking as if he were ready for the hinges of a bear trap
to spring around his neck. Kal just shook his head. "So, if I slip up and say, oh, I don't
know... shit... your not gonna hit me?" Kal just laughed.
Kanawha then asked, "OK, then why the
"Because I realized trust is a two way
street." Kal sagely answered. They looked so sweet standing
there, my heart just melted for them. Their stances and
expressions just illustrated the deep love they shared. "I was expecting you to trust me and my
judgment, but I was ignoring and discounting yours. I saw the
way Chance's face lit up each time you said things the way only you can
say them. He deserves to have that father... the man he lights up
over... the real you. I
think I do, too." He smiled, and Kanawha radiated with
pride from Kal's admission.
"You guys ain't gonna start humpin' in
the lot again are you?" Chance giggled. Ethan and I
lost it, and I had to sit down on the pavement I was laughing so hard.
"No, they only do that in the
bathroom, remember?" Ethan shot, as he and Chance joined
me on the pavement. Kal was so red, but Kanawha seemed to be
fairing rather well.
After laughing at them for what seemed an eternity, we all headed into
the mall to do some serious shopping. Kal and Kanawha headed off
with a list of things Chance would need for his room. Ethan,
Chance, and I headed for the higher-fashion teen stores. We
decided that if chance were going to be going to school, then he was
going to be the best dressed one in the bunch.
I have to say, shopping with Chance and Ethan was one of the most
times I had ever had. And, we were all the same size.
Chance was slightly taller, but our pants sizes and shirt sizes were
exactly the same. We all commented on how we would have a huge
wardrobe between the three of us. That is, until Chance
grew. I had a feeling he and Jew would be sharing clothes before
long, but for now, we had that privilege.
I know Ethan and I look way younger than we are, but being around
Chance made us act like we were teenagers again. It was rather
liberating, to say the least, because no one could honestly tell we
weren't. We tried on all different kinds of clothes. Ethan
and I would impersonate movie characters and the like. Chas would
impersonate various people he had observed, which was so comical.
He could actually do a lot of different voices, which somehow made it
all more humorous. Kal and Kanawha's charge cards were smoking
when we finished, but we still had shoes, socks, underclothes, and a
winter jacket to purchase. I spent quite a bit myself, and Ethan
went a tad overboard. I
think he is a compulsive shopper or something, but I love him anyway.
We met Kanawha and Kal at the food court for lunch. They had
quite a load of items themselves. Chance was overwhelmed at all the
places to eat, but he finally chose pizza, saying he had not had any in
a very long time. "Oh,
man. This is so good." He commented between
bites. It became apparent that Chance had his Daddy's appetite,
because those two could put away some food. Of course, Kanawha is
a big guy, so I guess that is to be expected. We ended up having
to get a third pizza. After polishing off the last slices, Chance
and Kanawha both rested back in their seats, each interlocking their
fingers to support the nape of their heads. They both had this
same look of contentment on their faces.
Kal ate much more slowly, and Ethan, well, he was a nibbler. That
thought spun my mind back to how passionately he can nibble. We were lying in my bed, and he and
I were kissing. He trailed to my ears and down my neck, nibbling
his way. When he reached my shirt, he slid his fingers around my
waist and grabbed the bottom. As he began slowly working my shirt
up my body, I stopped his hands. He just looked into my eyes and
smiled. He lowered himself to my naval and started kissing and
nibbling me there. He continued working my shirt upwards, kissing
every single inch of the many scars I have amassed through countless
surgeries along his way. Knowing that he did not find me
repulsive brought such a release. I silently cried as he
continued upwards. Lovingly, Ethan kissed my tears away.
Then, he continued nibbling. I broke out of my reminiscent
trance as I realized I was becoming rather aroused. I
refocused, and slowly, it subsided.
After lunch, we carried everything out to the van and returned for
round two. But first, Chance, Ethan, and I went to the
arcade. Chance and Ethan played quite a bit. I played some,
but I am just not that good at video games. I more enjoyed
watching them. They were so into the games. The tip of
Ethan's tongue would rest in the corner of his mouth when he would make
his attack moves. Chance's forehead would wrinkle and his
would draw together, as if he were mentally forcing the characters to
move. Chance was quickly turning out to be a match for Ethan,
which he was just exuberant about.
I was playing Chance, and Ethan was standing behind me, helping me work
the controllers when it happened. Five rather large guys,
still in high school, came by to taunt us.
"Well, look what we have here, boys!"
The largest one said. "Pussy-boy
Ethan and I may have been several years older, but these boys were a
lot bigger. They definitely looked like they were starters on a
football team's defensive line. They ranged in height from around
5'11" to 6'2". All were quite broad with stocky builds. All
had cocky looks on their faces, save one, who looked like he really did
not want to be a part of this. Ethan and I said nothing.
Chance on the other hand,
turned quickly. In that moment, something about him
changed. His stance was different. So were his
mannerisms. He exuded a sense of confidence and self-assuredness
that was not present before. "That
none of your concern whether any of us is or ain't fags. And God
help me, you ain't gonna hurt none on my friends." Chance just
glared at the big kid.
"And what are you gonna do 'bout it?"
the big one taunted. Ethan and I were worried, but it just
happened so fast. We did not have a second to react before it was
The big one went to shove Chance, but the little guy grabbed his
a flash, the big kid was lying flat on his back and Chance was sitting
on his chest with one hand around the kid's throat and the other fist
balled up and drew back. "I
might be little, and I might be skinny, but I reckon I can whip up on
you somethin' fierce." Chance bellowed. "So, what are you gonna do 'bout it?"
he taunted back. "You're gonna
say your sorry is what you're gonna do. 'Else, I'm gonna have to
show your friends what a big sissy coward you are."
The kid quickly backed down. "S-s-sorry,
man." Chance stared him down and slowly let the boy
up. He never broke his stance, and the big kid and his friends
left, except the one.
Ethan and I were giving Chance a serious going over. There were
no signs of injury. Ethan laughed. "Well, he surely has his Daddy's
"And a whole lot of his Dad's, too."
I commented. Chance glowed with the thoughts of being like either
of his fathers. Ethan looked puzzled, so I explained. "In all the time I have known Kal, he has
never backed away from a challenge. He is always ready to stand
up for what is right, and he always tries to avoid hurting
anybody. Kanawha seems a bit more forthcoming and in your face
about it, though. So, yea, I think he has a good blend of them
>From the corner of my eye, I could see that one kid still standing
there. After a moment, he made his way over to us and spoke. "Look, I'm sorry about them.
They just get carried away sometimes. I guess they can be asses,
truth be known." he
said, lowering his head in shame.
"I tried to get them to leave you guys alone, but
Blade just wouldn't listen." he apologized. It was
obviously sincere, so Ethan
and I accepted his apology.
Chance just looked him up and down. "Why you hangin' round 'em then? They
called us faggots. Why'd you wanna be friends with 'em? You
know 'em boys hate gays." The kid looked confused, so
Chance asked, "You afraid 'bout what
they might do to you?"
The kid looked shocked. "What?
What do you mean by that?"
Chance replied mater-of-factly, "I
might not've been in school for a good while, but I ain't
stupid." He stepped over and pat the kid on the shoulder.
"I don't care none if you's gay."
"How... How would you know..."
the kid mumbled.
Chance shrugged his shoulders. "I just
knowed is all, not sure why
really. Just like I knowed I could whip up on that big fella."
Chance said. "It wasn't right
what he was a doin', and somethin' in me said not to let him do
it. Then, I just knowed I could stop 'im is all. I wasn't really
hurt him or nothin'. I's just gonna teach him not to pick on
people." Then, he
looked at the kid... sizing him up, it seemed. "You just
need you some new friends is all. 'Em boys ain't no good no
ways. They tried hurtin' us cause we's little. That ain't
no kinda person to be friends with."
Chance smiled and stuck out his hand. The kid shook it. 'Yea, he is a lot like his Dad.' I thought. I was reminded of
the time when Kal did the same thing for me. We were in seventh
grade gym class and some of the boys were laughing, making fun of me
because of the scars. Kal stood up to them in much the same way
as Chance, though not quite so forcefully. He then comforted me.
Kal said I must be a pretty courageous person to have been through so
much and survived. He
told me he knew about the surgeries from my sister. He
then said he would be honored to have me as a friend. In that
moment, my life was touched by one of the kindest, most loving and
caring persons I had ever known. Chance was SO much like
him. Actually, my little Ethan was, too.
"My name is Eric, but everyone calls
me Sorrow." The name really fit him, I observed. He
was a nice looking kid, but he just had this sad persona about
him. I just wondered what all was going on in his life.
"I'm Chance. These boys is Ethan and Shaft." Chance
turned and looked at the door. He then pointed, "See them guys right there... They's
holdin' hands... Yea, them... Them's my dads."
Chance waived at his
fathers, and Ethan and I just knew we were in deep trouble.
As we droned through the mall shopping, I was on such an emotional
high. The morning started off well enough, a few times in fact...
hehehe... even though Chance seemed to have shared this with
everyone. Hela had extended the olive branch to me by fixing me
grits, which I must say were the best I had ever eaten. Ethan had
a wonderful guy who deeply loved him, and I could feel he felt exactly
the same way. Jena was finding her way into a loving relationship
with Jew... the emotions in him were just so overwhelming, and I knew
he was a fantastic man. Everyone wanted to have a part in getting
Chance settled into his new life... that fact just made me feel proud,
because Killian and I were blessed with truly wonderful friends.
Somehow, I was in emotional control, which made me feel much more
comfortable. But, the greatest part of the morning was when my
love told me he and Chance deserved the REAL me in their lives!
As we walked, I kept thinking back to the morning shower. Maybe I
am a big horn dog, but I just could not help
myself. Killian was so beautiful... emotionally, mentally,
spiritually, and way so physically. I just could not get him out
of my mind. So, I just untucked my long shirt to hide my
I normally do not like shopping much at all. But, today we were
shopping for our son, and I was very enthused. We were looking at
bedding, and I picked out what I thought would be good for Chance.
"Love, that is a very nice bedding
ensemble, but we could by him five for what they want for that
one." He said, trying so hard not to hurt my
feelings. I just smiled to myself, knowing just how compassionate
my beloved truly was.
"I just want him to have the best, I
guess. But you are right." Then, I flashed him a
smirk and grabbed five cheaper ones. "He might just like your idea of having
variety better, anyway." He just silently
shook with laughter as I put them back. He was so breathtaking
when he did that. He was breathtaking no matter what he did.
"OK, now seriously. Let's get
him something from the mid-range. Good quality at a good price,
does that sound alright with you, Daddy?" he smiled.
"How about this one?" I
asked. The comforter was an American flag with a large soaring
eagle centered on it.
"Chance's colors and symbolic of your
dream. I like that one."
"OK, now what is on the list?"
I asked. Soon, we were loaded with matching curtains, rugs,
bathroom accessories, towels, extra sheets, a couple blankets, pillows,
a mattress cover, and accent pillows. Somehow, through the course
of it all, I ended up being the pack mule, but I did not complain a
bit. Truth be known, even though Killian is more than capable of
carrying a rather hefty load, I would have taken most of it from
him... I guess I have that southern gentleman thing stuck in my
head. Killian also had the list, which meant he needed a little
more mobility than I did.
After purchasing these items, we took them out to the van. There
was just far too much, and we had way more shopping to do. We
then headed to the sporting goods store, which I was not sure how it
fit into this.
Killian explained. "Roe said
that Chance has a strong passion for baseball."
"How would he know?" I
asked. I didn't know he did.
"Because, Roe, despite his many
not-so-desirable traits, happens to be a good listener. He heard
Chance talking with Jew about baseball today. Jew even promised
to see if we would let him take Chance out to play later, once
everything was done for the day. So, Roe decided that it
would be nice to use a baseball theme in his room. He had a few
ideas, but he thought with you being a design man, you might think of
some unique schemes to use." He was so passionate about
making this room special to Chance, and I quickly caught the
So many of the things I could picture placed here or there, but then, I
began visualizing other ways to use them. It was kind of
exciting, really, thinking of how many ways a person could use items...
but, then again, that is all part of design. I was so in the
element, and Love let me roam freely getting anything I thought we
could use. I even called Roe with a few ideas, and he eagerly
agreed to pick up any needed supplies. I gave him a list, and he
read it back to double check everything.
It was then lunch time. Chance was so happy. He seemed to
have bonded well with the other boys,
and I noticed that Shaft and Ethan were acting like teenagers. My
boy could eat, though, and I laughed at how much he reminded me of
myself. But, at the same time, he was so much like Killian.
He even looked like us, which I just found amazing.
After lunch, we dropped off load number two and headed back in for more
shopping. This time, we went to the hobby shop for baseball
cards. I was not too familiar with the sport, but Killian called
Jew for advice here. We followed his suggestions and then headed
out to find pictures and a few frames.
We were walking when we spotted Chance, Ethan, and Shaft in the
arcade. They seemed to be having such a good time, Killian and I
stopped to watch them. We both just smiled taking in the sights
of our son enjoying himself.
The mood was cut short, though, as I felt an antagonistic
arrogance. Then, I spotted them. A group of boys were
heading towards the arcade, no doubt to cause trouble. I pointed
them out to Killian, but something in me told me to stay out of it,
that this was not my fight. I then turned to Killian, "Love, read Chance. See if he is in
"I can't just make it happen,
Kanawha. I don't know how, and I don't think it is meant to work
that way." He started.
"Yes, you can. Just focus on
Chance. I know you can. I have faith in you, so just try."
I encouraged. He focused , but then looked as if he were ready to
give up. I wrapped my arms around him and whispered in his ear. "Love, I know you can do this. Just
He tried again, leaning back to me smiling. "It worked. I'll be. It
actually worked." Then, he concentrated. "No sign of danger, but something is going
on. Everything is changing really fast. Is he..."
Just as Killian was explaining this to me, I could see the badger
standing around Chance. The boys were walking up to them, and the
badger began to change. "Thats
it, son. I believe in you. You can do this." I
whispered out as the spectrum of color swirled about. As he
to face the boys, the aura reshaped itself into a shining eagle. "Oh, Love! It is beautiful! It
just changed, and it is so beautiful."
"Well, that explains the
changes. Just." he stopped.
"Just what?" I asked.
"That is what one of the symbols
mean. Just. That one means belief. And that one means
knowledge..." as Killian relayed his reading, Chance took
down the bully. Love was in a panic, but I reassured him our son
was fine. In a couple of minutes, Chance let the bully up and
four of the group departed.
"Well, he is certainly like his
Daddy." Killian laughed.
"Really? I think he is more like
his Dad." I rebutted. "He stood up for other people in need, yet
he did it in a way that no one really got hurt. That sounds like
his Dad to me." Killian just smiled. "See, I would have totally kicked his ass."
As we walked to the arcade, Chance comforted the one boy that had
remained. He then shook his hand, smiling as if he had found a
long lost friend. "See, I told
you. He is just like you." I grinned, feeling pride
for having such wonderful men in my life. Gently, I stroked
Killian's hand as Chance turned and waived at us. Ethan and Shaft
looked like they were expecting a good ass chewing, and I
We walked into the arcade, and Chance came running to us. My love
and I set down our packages and embraced our son. He was ecstatic
that he had made a new friend. "Dad!
Daddy! I got me a new friend!" He motioned for
the boy to come over and meet us. "This
here is Eric, but he says they all call 'im Sorrow. So, I guess
that is what we'll call 'im, too." He turned to his new friend. "These is my dads." He beamed
This Sorrow kid was one sad young man. I could feel it
strongly. He was a little nervous and a bit excited, but mostly,
he was just so very sad... nothing malicious, or even angry... just
sadness. He was a nice looking kid. He stood about 6' tall,
with a broad, stocky frame. He had on cargo pants and a blue
T. His black hair was tipped in electric blue, and it hung down
over his light blue eyes. His skin was pale, and he had slight
circles under his eyes. Killian introduced us and we both shook
"Nice to meet you." he said,
smiling. But, I knew that beneath that smile was so much
sadness... far more than one so young should have to experience.
"I suppose you saw what happened
earlier?" Shaft asked. We
nodded. "Well, it just happened
so fast. I hope you guys
can forgive us. I mean, he could have been hurt, and it would
have been all our fault."
I picked him up, just like I had done numerous times to Ethan. "You two could have been hurt, also.
You guys were showing Chance a great time, minding your own
business. You did not start any of it, so why would we blame you?"
I smiled. "Actually, we should
thank you. Our boy had a great time and made three new friends
today. For what more could a father ask?"
Shaft hugged me. "Thanks, big
guy. I swear, that kid of yours is so much like the both of
you. He protected us, so I guess he is our hero!"
Chance was all grin. "Oh, it ain't
nothin'. You guys is my friends. That's what we're supposed
Ethan chimed in, "What do you mean
nothing? That was awesome. You were so brave standing up to
him and moved in quick and fast, just like your Daddy would do.
You SO could have kicked his butt! But, you didn't hurt him and
even let him go. You showed him compassion and what a good man
you are, just like your Dad would do. In our book,
that makes you our hero."
Our little man just blushed. Sorrow then added, "The look on Blade's face when you flipped
him over was priceless! I believe he will think twice before he
assaults someone else."
"I hope so. Say, you wanna come
shop with us some? We still gotta get more stuff, so I figured
you might wanna come with us." Chance said, in that unique
way of his. I was so proud of him, and I knew my love was as
We continued our shopping together, with Sorrow joining us.
Chance was really taken by him, and I think it was mutual. It was
hard to tell with all that sadness. When it was time to leave,
Chance asked if Sorrow could come home with him. I explained that
we would have to ask his parents. Sorrow called his mother on his
cell phone, and I made a mental note to talk to Killian about getting
for emergencies... alright, because it seemed the other
kids had them, and I wanted him to fit in. Killian spoke
Sorrow's mother, and she agreed to let him come to the house.
As we unloaded, Killian suggested Chance go ahead and show Sorrow
around, making sure to introduce him to everyone. With that being
done, Killian left with Jena and Cole to see the social worker and
register Chance for school. Though I wanted to go with my love, I
also wanted to help Roe and Jew get Chance's room together.
They had painted one coat and picked up the supplies while it was
drying. While Jew applied the second coat to the walls, Roe and I got
down to business. We took a few baseball bats and cut them in
half longways. We also cut several baseballs down the middle. On on of
the halves, we attached hooks to make a coat rack. The other half
of this bat would be hung on the wall along with the two halves of one
of the baseballs, a flag, and a glove. The other bats and
attached to box window treatments we built and covered with
American flag fabric. With a little ingenuity, we replaced all
with baseballs. We also attached baseballs to the sides of
the window frames and fastened the tiebacks for the curtains on them.
We built a few shadow boxes to display the various paraphernalia from
the sporting goods store... a jersey with Chance's name on it, baseball
and batting gloves, baseballs, a few caps, and the baseball cards.
When the painting was finished, we laid down the green Astroturf on the
floor. We then painted a large baseball diamond in the main
floorspace. When the paint dried, we started putting it all
We were just putting the bedding on when Killian returned.
met Janet Kingsley at the mission. She was such a nice lady and a
devoted worker. Kal explained in complete detail the situation
with Chance, how he and Kanawha had met, fallen in love, and then found
Chance. Janet was thrilled for Kal and the positive changes his
life had taken. She talked a good bit about things Kal would
probably want to do, getting medical and dental checkups and the
like. "There is a
matter of foster parenting, though." she said, and then she
explained the entire process to us. Kal attentively listened, but he
was fidgeting from his excitement.
"Now, we can get paperwork
taken care of later. But, for now, I thought the best way to do
this was through the mission. Seeing how we only have adult
shelters, we would need a safer place to keep a minor. I arranged
for temporary guardianship of Chance for you in this way.
You will be keeping him for us. I have already made the phone
calls to the state office regarding Chance and the Mission was granted
temporary guardianship until foster care placement. You have to
go through all the channels to become foster parents, but until then,
he will safely be placed with you." She then discussed the
process again, clarifying any questions Kal might have had. "There is one thing though,
I will have to do some checking before we complete the
applications. You may have to do this alone, meaning only you are
listed as Chance's foster parent. The law is a little tricky
there. One gay parent is one thing, but as a couple, it gets a
"He is our son, though... both
of ours. If something were to happen to me, then how would
Killian be able to keep him?" Kal was really shaken up by this,
and my heart was aching for him. This just seemed rather unfair
you ask me.
"I just want to present the worse case
scenario. Hopefully, we will be able to place him with you both,
but just in case, I think you need to be prepared. And to answer
your question, again with the worse case scenario, Kanawha would have
to apply to be a foster parent.
I could probably do the same thing for him as I am doing now."
"Well, what about us wanting to adopt
him? Is that any better?" Kal asked, and I could
tell he was really getting down about this. I was angry myself,
but I knew it had nothing to do with Janet. It was just the way
things were set up... to be biased and discriminatory without seeming
so until you looked into it.
"Again, Kal, it depends upon whether
one or both of you apply. I hate this, I really do, but what
friend would I be if I did not point out the reality of what you are up
against. There are just so many iffy factors. I really wish
I could say it will all turn out fine and that you guys had the same
rights to be parents as other couples, but that is just not always the
case." Janet pat his hand. "Look, if you are serious about adopting
him, I would see a lawyer for advice. But, in the meantime, I
would also apply to be his foster parent. That way, you can hold
on to him. Whether or not one or both of your names are on the
paper, you both will still be a part of his life. And if
something should happen to you, I would move heaven and earth to make
sure Chance stayed with Kanawha. You know that."
Janet paused, showing the honesty in her words. "I really will try to do everything I can
on this one, Kal. I know you have to be an excellent father, and
with your judgment, I am sure Kanawha is one also. Just enjoy him
and let me worry about this one for you."
Kal gave the best smile he could under the circumstances. Jena
was fuming, but she kept quiet. From the little time I have known
her, I knew that was difficult for her... hehehe. "Well, thanks Janet. I will leave you
to do what you can for us. Please, keep us in your prayers, for
Chance's sake especially." he said quietly.
I turned to him as we left the office and gave him the tightest hug I
could. Jena mouthed off her frustration as Kal and I quietly
wept. It just made no sense to me. Kal was one of the best
people I had ever met. Kanawha was a match made in heaven for Kal, so I
knew he was a wonderful man, too. Chance was a kid nobody wanted,
except for one couple... a couple who happened to be gay. So,
because of that one factor, the fact that they were an actively gay
couple, they might be denied keeping a kid no one else wanted to begin
with... What logic was there in all this?
I had never seen Kal like this. He was always so strong and
optimistic. He was almost hollow and defeated. Jena came up
behind him and stroked his back, as I figured she had finished her
ranting. So, we stood there for a good while, just holding him
tight. I felt so powerless, so I did the only thing I could do
for Kal. I prayed.
After a while, Kal half-smiled at me. "A test of faith, I guess. Cole, I
know Chance is meant to be ours... both of ours. I feel it in my
very soul. I just don't understand this. I just don't know
what to do."
Jena softly spoke. "You DO what
you and Kanawha do best. You fight. You fight for what is
right. You fight for what you believe in. And you fight for
the one you love."
In her simple, quiet statement, God answered my prayer, as Kal
was renewed. The zest and unshakable faith he had was
returned. He smiled that big, toothy smile and my heart
sang. "Thanks, Jena. Your
right, and I can see why Kanawha is so fond of you. You know when
to kick us in the ass." She giggled and took her
bow. He then looked at me. "Thank
you, too, Cole. In your quiet, loving way, you held me stable,
while you did the one thing you do better than anyone. You
prayed." He hugged us both. "Now, let's go get our boy registered for
school and then see about a lawyer." Before we were out the
door, I called my friend, Jessica, and set up an
appointment for Kal and Kanawha to see her tomorrow at 1:00.
Jessica was an attorney who would understand Kal and Kanawha's plight.
That was twice in twenty-four hours that my prayers had been
answered. Ethan Lafferty was an answer to a long awaited prayer,
that my brother would find love and happiness. Despite the
heavily stacked odds against a very long future together, Ethan
accepted my brother's love and committed himself to Shaft. It was
a joyous experience, and I knew that during whatever time my poor
brother had remaining, he would experience the wonder of having a
loving, devoted partner with whom to share each moment. You just
don't know how special a person Ethan really is. In all the years
I've quietly spent holding Shaft while he poured his heart out in tears
of loneliness and rejection, I have prayed that God would send him
someone... someone strong enough to love Shaft regardless of his ailing
heart... someone who would inspire him to live. Ethan was that
someone, and even as I pondered this, I gave thanks for him.
Everyones spirits had been lifted, and we joked around some as we drove
to the school. There, it was Jena's arena, and she was truly a
woman who knew how to take charge. Since Chance had not been in
school for such a long time, they were hesitant about placing him in
the ninth grade where he should be. Jena argued her case and
they agreed to test him for placement. They also agreed that if
his scores were not quite what they should be, but were high enough, he
would be allowed to enter grade nine provided he had tutoring to bring
him up to a satisfactory level. They even gave her copies of
textbooks so she could help prepare Chance for his test.
Jena was amazing in action. She just had this drive about her, a
lot like Hela. It was as if she was the one running that school
by less than half way through the meeting. She was impressive and
knew how to get action. The principle even agreed to pair Chance
up with some peers who would help him adjust to the newness of school
structure. I honestly think if she asked for the class to be
conducted on the school lawn, they would have agreed. She just
had that way about her. The principle suggested Chance come by
one day before school started to become more familiar with the school,
and Jena thought that was a great idea. We had ten days to get
Chance ready. And with Jena in charge, I just knew he was going
I was so thankful Jena had came with us. After the last round,
Kal needed a victory... we needed a victory. Jena delivered us
one. And we celebrated that victory all the way through the halls
and to the car. I smiled at her, and she knowingly winked at
me. Nothing needed to be said.
We then went home. On the way, Kal stopped and got three dozen
roses. One was for Nanna, another for Kanawha's Grams, and I knew
the other was for Kanawha. He was such a romantic, but then
again, I was the queen of romance novels and tissues. I saw
almost everything in an err of romance and love.
was so excited when he came bursting though the front door. Right
behind him came the saddest kid I have ever seen. Chance
introduced him to me as Sorrow, and I had no doubt why they called him
that. Even though he seemed excited to be spending time with a
friend, this kid was drowning in sadness.
showing him around the house, I took my little guy and his new friend
into the kitchen and fixed them a snack. They talked quite a bit
as they ate, and Chance seemed different somehow... more confident and
self-assured. Maybe it was that he had made a new friend on his
own accord, but I was pleased with the change.
He was so much like his fathers. As I watched him interact, I
could see them both plainly. I had known Killian for such a long
time, and despite only meeting Kanawha, I knew him, as well.
Maybe it is a woman thing, but I knew the heart of that man, and it was
was as if Chance had the best of them both. He looked so much
like them, too, and my fool's heart was quickly forgetting that it was
not a biological relation. He was their son, fashioned by the
hand of God to be with them. That much was certain.
And there was something so special about that kid. Kal had this
ability to bring out the best in a person, to inspire you to try to
become a better human being. Chance just made you want to believe
that the world was a good place, that everything would resolve to a
happy ending. We all loved Kal, but we were drawn to Chance
because of Chance. Everyone found a way to help in welcoming and
settling him into his new home. It was as if we could all see
this great source of hope sitting in our midsts. He was a
survivor, one who defied all the odds. I guess his name really
suited him. That thought made me smile.
"Well, Chance, baby, we need to get
your hair cut. After that, I
believe Jew has a surprise for you. One I think Sorrow may enjoy,
as well. So, what say we get started on taming that mop of
yours." I joked.
"Yea, I reckon I need one real
bad. I seen most 'em boys had
their hair cut kinda short while we was out today." he
expressing deep thought into the matter. "I guess I should get
mine short too."
"Well, baby, I have a few pictures to
show you that I thought you might
like. Maybe you and Sorrow can look through them and
always seems to help having a second opinion. And, being a young
man, Sorrow would know what boys these days are wearing."
"Sure, Chance. I'll help you if
you want." Sorrow
smiled. Boy, if anybody needed a little hope in his life, this
kid was the one.
"Good. I put the magazines and
pictures over there on the
table. You boys have at it. Let me know when you
decided." I just wished Mic would get back from the
soon. There was something about Sorrow I thought her intuitive
nature could help.
The boys looked through the magazines and pictures for a good
while. They laughed and carried on, as they found some of the
pictures funny. They lightly picked back and forth, and I was
brought to think of how wonderful a gift friendship truly is. To
just know someone cares for you and is there when your in need, it was
priceless. I thought of how fortunate I was to have the many
friends I had living with me as my family, and I had made four new
one's in the last day... perhaps five before the day would be
done. It was just an humbling experience.
"What about this one?"
Sorrow said excitedly. It was a rather trendy look, with lots of
"Oh! I like that one
there. Hela, you think this would look good on me? I don't
wanna look ugly or nothin'." my little guy asked.
"Chance, baby, I could shave you bald
and you wouldn't be anywhere near ugly. You are a handsome young
man, so just wipe that doubt right out of your mind." I
smiled, running my fingers through his thick, curly hair. I took
in his facial features, again thinking of just how much he was like his
fathers. "I think that
hairstyle would be an excellent choice. And it would be very easy
to fix. Just a few products and your fingers, and you have the
look. So, is this what you want?"
Chance looked at Sorrow and his smile grew across his face. He
then turned to me, shaking his head with so much enthusiasm. "Yea. That's the one."
"Well, lets get to it, then."
I shampooed and conditioned his hair at the sink. I then seated
him in one of the stools and put a cape around him. His grin just
kept growing as the hair started to fall. "You know, baby, if you smile any bigger,
this hair is going to be all in your mouth." Chance and
Sorrow both just giggled and laughed. Mic finally arrived home, and as
introductions were made to Sorrow, she began feeling him out, talking
as I cut hair.
I used the razor and tapered his hair quite close in the nape and
sides. From the crown to the bangs, the length increased so that
the bangs fell midway between the bridge of his nose and his
nostrils. Afterwards, I texturized the daylight out of that hair.
Lord, was his mane thick. Using the edgers, I shaped a natural
neckline and thin side burns. I then used the straight razor to
clean everything up. I noticed a little downy fuzz beginning to
take form on Chances cheeks. "You
know, baby, before long, you are gonna have to learn to shave."
Chance just smiled and felt his face. "You think so? Wow! That'll be
fun, shavin' with Dad and Daddy. I might just grow me a beard
then." he laughed. "No.
I don't think I want one of 'em things. They'd get all in your
mouth after a while." Then, he and Sorrow giggled some
more. With the last stroke of the razor, I applied the product
and handed Chance the mirror. "Well,
baby, what do you think?"
He just stared at himself in amazement. "Wow! Is that really me?"
"Oh, Chance! You look so
handsome!" Mic enthused. "I might just have to divorce my husband
"I don't reckon I met him yet."
"No. He is overseas in
Korea. He is in the military."
"Well, you best not tell him you think
I's handsome then. He might just get all mad and whip me silly."
my little guy joked.
"You really do look nice,
Chance. I think everyone at school will love it. Its only a
couple of weeks away you know." Sorrow said. "Maybe we will have some classes
together. That would be sweet." he enthused.
"I hope we has all of 'em together,
cause I don't know nobody else at that school." Chance
replied nervously. "Even if I
did, I still hope we has all of 'em together." Mic and I
smiled at each other. We would have to help arrange Chance's
"OK, boys. You need to go find
Jew. Remember, he has a big surprise lined up." I
Chance gave me a big hug. "Thanks,
Hela. I look like 'em other boys now!"
"No, baby. You are way more
handsome than they are." He just blushed and hugged
Mic got her hugs in with both of the boys, and like lightening, they
were off to find Jew. Mic helped me get things cleaned up.
Then, we started fixing a special dinner. Grams and Nanna were
coming, after all. Our new family was having their first meal
together, and we wanted everything to be perfect.
sounded like a herd of cattle were running in the hallway. "I guess she's done." I said, and I
was happy with myself. I was calm and in control. I had my
focus, and I had hardly stuttered all day. My relationship
with Jena took a lot of that worry away, and I felt a bit more at
"Well, Mr. Sexy, you best be going
then. We don't want him to see the room just yet. That
would spoil the surprise." Roe said, causing me to
blush. He was such a good friend to me, though, and I loved
"Stay out of trouble." I
joked, and Roe acted all innocent. He can be so funny sometimes.
I met the boys in the hallway, and directed them to Shaft's room... I
wondered if I should make it Ethan and Shaft's room or if that would be
too soon. Once there, we presented our surprise. A baseball
glove, a bat, a cap, and a ball. Chance was overjoyed, and I was
amazed at how such simple things made him happy. I really liked
that kid, and I meant it when I told Kal and Killian that I was keeping
him. He was going to stay a part of my life, no matter
That Sorrow kid was nice, but there was a lot of pain going on in
there. If anyone knew pain, Shaft and I did. I hoped that
we would be able to help him in some way, the way our friends have done
for us over the years. He seemed to really like Chance, and I
wondered if this was his first friend... his first true friend, that
is. I knew Chance sure was fond of him.
Everyone made notice of Chance's new cut, and I had to give Hela
credit. She had done a fantastic job. He looked even more
like his fathers now, and I was amazed at the hand of destiny in all of
this. Chance put on his cap after he made Ethan promise to help
him fix his hair later. He somehow made you feel that life was
going to get better. I could not explain it, but it was so much
like the effect Kal seems to have on people.
We gathered up gloves for everyone plus a few extra and
headed over to the park. It was a nice walk, not but a couple of
blocks from the house. It was always teaming with life, and I
hoped Chance would get to meet a few more kids. If nothing else,
we would have fun. He seemed to be as fascinated by baseball as I
was, which I found endearing. I entertained the idea of having a
son of my own someday who was just like Chance... taking him to the
park, watching him play ball or whatever it was he wanted to do... just
being a father. That was one of my top personal desires in life,
to be a good father. Finding Jena gave me hope that my dream
might just become a reality some day.
Then, I daydreamed of Jena and I, years into the future. Grocery
shopping, fixing breakfast together, getting the kids off to school,
coming home to find her there.... just every day things, but they
seemed extraordinary with the presence of Jena. I wondered if she
had any such dreams of me.
When we arrived at the park, there were several kids. The
baseball field, though, was empty, so we laid our claim. Little
by little, a few kids would come over to watch. Then, Chance
would ask them if they wanted to play.
It struck me that this was probably the one thing Chance always wanted
the other kids to do when he would watch them. But, as he told
me, they never did. He had such strong character, and I was proud
to know him. He turned no one away, even kids that were probably
much too young to be playing. We grownups had so much fun,
probably more than the kids had. I helped teach a lot of the kids
how to bat and catch. We shared what gloves we had among the
players, and ended up rotating batters out to the field so everyone had
a turn. There were just so many kids playing. There was no score being
kept, no winners or losers. We were just playing for fun.
Chance caught on rather quickly, and I could tell Sorrow had played
before. He was an excellent batter, and not to shabby of a
pitcher. He and Chance seemed to relish in helping the little
kids. They had
patients and were encouraging. They also had a way of making the
kids laugh and feel relaxed. I
thought they would make excellent big brothers in one of the mission
As our time dwindled down, we said our goodbyes. Everyone seemed
to have had a great time, and during our discussions, we decided to try
to play anytime we found the opportunity. I was just
thrilled. I was able to share one of my passions and inspire
children to at least develop an appreciation for the game. When
we arrived back at the house, Kal, Kanawha, Jena, and Hela were
standing on the front porch.
Chance ran to his fathers. "Dad!
Daddy! You should've seen 'em. There was all kinda boys
there, some girls too. And, they all wanted to play, so we let
'em all play. Sorrow and me even helped 'em little kids bat and
stuff. It was so fun. You should've came with us.
We's gonna try to play a lot, so you gotta come next time, K?"
He rambled with enthusiasm.
Jena came up to me, wrapping her arms around my waist in a tight
embrace. She then ran her hand up my back and pulled my head down
to her, kissing me gently. "Thanks
for making the little guys day, tiger." I just loved her
calling me that... and I called her kitten. It just happened in
our conversations last night, but I liked it. We had pet names
for each other, which I felt was a good sign.
Being close to her was getting me a little too excited. "Well, uh, he actually kind of made my day."
I admitted. "You have to
um, come next time. It was so..." she kissed me and ended
"Only if you wear those tight baseball
pants!" she seductively said. "Then, I'll have something worth watching."
I was blushing so badly. "Well,
um, you know, I um guess I have a f-few pairs around somewhere."
I said, getting rather hot and bothered by her presence.
She just laughed and brushed my hair back with her fingers. "You might want to dig them out.
Maybe even put them on later this evening." she
smiled. "But, for now, we have
a mission. After Chance sees his room, get cleaned up. We
are going to go pick up Nanna at the bus station and then go pick up
Grams. I can't wait for her to meet you. She is going to be
When we returned from the school, I just could not bring myself to tell
Kanawha about the hardships we were facing in keeping our son. I
decided to wait until the morning, not wanting to ruin the evening for
him. I swore Jena and Cole to secrecy about it, and Jena agreed
with me. I honestly felt that God had a hand in the way the
events had played out today, because I just knew Kanawha would have
been in defense mode with Janet. She is a good friend and a
wonderful person, and I knew none of this was Janet's fault.
Kanawha would know that, too, but I just felt certain he would have
expressed his being a tad bit
upset anyway. I could just envision him body-slamming poor Janet
on her desk, and I began to giggle uncontrollably.
My love came rushing down the stairs as he evidently heard our
arrival. He quickly wrapped me up in his arms, sweeping me off my
feet and twirling me around. "Love,
I have missed you so much!" he started, kissing me
"You know, I could get used to coming
home like this. Talk about your five-star service." I
quipped, and he snickered as he remembered our earlier conversation
Suddenly, he was reminded of what he had been doing. "Speaking of stars, come see what we have
done with the room. That Roe is pretty good at this. I was
rather impressed. So, you just have to see it!" he
enthused as he threw me over his shoulders and trotted up the
Soon, we were at Chance's door. The baseball pennant with his
name on it would indicate that to anyone who happened by. Kanawha
put me to my feet, and I reached for the knob, "Oh! Now this is rather
ingenious. A baseball doorknob." I bragged, and Kanawha
"You know, if you open the door, you
can see the rest of the work we have done." he shot.
I opened the door and was totally amazed. It was
spectacular. "Love, you have
outdone yourself! This should be in a magazine or
something. Wow!" He stroked my neck with his hand as
he stood behind me. I was amazed at the way it was all put
together. The baseball diamond floor, the window treatments, the
shadow boxes, everything was just so... Kanawha, I guess. I took
great delight in that, for he poured his entire soul into making our
son a fine place to call his own. That reminded me of something
else I needed to talk with him about tomorrow. I turned to him
and wrapped my arms around his midsection, looking into those sapphire
pools of his, "I think we are going
to have one ecstatic son. Speaking of which, where is he, anyway?"
"After Hela cut his hair, Jew and the
boys took our son and his friend to play baseball." he
smiled. "They should be back
I flashed my mischievous grin. "You
look awfully dirty. Think we have time for a shower?"
Without a word, he threw me over his shoulder and sprinted to our
bathroom. Setting me to my feet, he excitedly said, "Don't go anywhere. I am going to get
Jena to run to the house to get me some clothes." He
dashed off and returned quickly. He grabbed me up into his arms,
lifting me off the floor. "I
have been thinking about this all day!"
As we kissed, we slowly undressed each other. Well, it started
out slowly, but in all honesty, we were soon practically ripping each
others clothes off. We repeated the morning scene in the shower,
then washed one another, paying careful attention to certain areas...
which, of course, lead to another repeat. I was really starting
to like baring it all in front of my love.
After our shower, we found Kanawha's clothes lying on our bed.
Jena left a little note: "You
know, those things are going to fall off if you don't quit playing with
them... That includes playing with each others." I was
surprised to find I was not the slightest bit embarrassed this time,
and I could care less who knew what we were doing.
We dressed and headed down stairs to await our son's arrival
home. Hela and Jena were on the front porch talking, so Kanawha
and I decided to joint them.
"Thanks for the little note.
I'll keep that in mind." Kanawha said smugly.
"Oh, Stormy. You know me."
Jena laughed. "Hey, Hela was
telling me Chance really wants to be in classes with Sorrow, so I think
we need to try and arrange this. I think it would alleviate a
whole lot of anxiety for Chance. Hela and Mic seem to think it
would be good for Sorrow, too."
"Is it just me, or is that not one of
the saddest kids you have ever seen?" I asked, and Hela
and Kanawha agreed.
"Mic and I think Chance might help him
through some of the pain and, well, sorrow he seems to be carrying
around with him." Hela added. "I notice a lot of you two in Chance.
He just has this way about him, and they have quickly developed a
strong friendship. Mic and I think that is exactly what Sorrow
"You have my vote." Kanawha
"Mine, too." I said.
"Then, it is settled."
Jena finalized. "When they get
back, Jew and I will go pick up Nanna and Grams. That will give
you time to get Chance cleaned up and ready for their arrival.
Plus, it will give me a chance to show him off to Grams!"
As we were laughing, in came the troupes. Chance came running to
Daddy! You should've seen 'em. There was all kinda boys
girls too. And, they all wanted to play, so we let 'em all
Sorrow and me even helped 'em little kids bat and stuff. It was
fun. You should've came with us. We's gonna try to play a
lot, so you
gotta come next time, K?"
"We wouldn't miss it. So, I take it baseball was a good
thing?" I asked.
Chance radiated his enthusiasm as he told us about the whole
experience. Sorrow added comments as needed. I was so happy
our little man had made a friend, but nowhere near as happy as the two
of them seemed.
As he finished his story, Kanawha said, "Son, I guess it is time to go get cleaned
up. We put your clothes in your room. Hey, why don't you
take Sorrow up and show him your room."
"Oh, OK, Daddy." he
replied happily. Upstairs they trotted. In a few seconds
you could hear the excitement. We (the whole herd of us) all
strolled up to see.
"Who did this?" Chance enthused.
"We all did." Kanawha
said simply. "All your friends
and family wanted to welcome you to your new home." I
just had to kiss him for that.
Chance eagerly hugged everyone and then started pointing out everything
in his room. We all took notice and commented on each thing he
brought to our attention. Sorrow looked a bit confused, but
didn't ask anything. I figured Chance would tell him all about it
at some point anyway. He did comment on a lot of the things,
though. During all the commotion, Jena and Jew slipped away.
After the novelty wore down, I told Chance he needed to get cleaned up
and changed into whatever he wanted. We adults then headed
downstairs, and congregated in the living room. A little later,
Chance and Sorrow came down the stairs. Everyone turned their
attention to Chance.
He was stunning. He had on blue low-rise jeans with a black belt,
white, and blue A & F t-shirt, and a black
pair of Sketchers. His hair looked so trendy, so haphazardly
placed. I was just amazed. Everyone commented on him, and
he blushed as red as the sleeves on his shirt. He and Sorrow came
and sat beside Kanawha and I. We all conversed for a bit.
Jena and Jew came through the door. "Chance, buddy, we
would like you to meet your grandmothers... Nanna and Grams."
that's it for chapter four. Thanks for reading, and please let me
know what you think. Chapter five will be coming soon.