Date: Fri, 7 Apr 2000 17:10:14 -0700 From: Scotty Subject: Poor White Trash - 10 POOR WHITE TRASH by Scotty Yates First, I would like to say thank you for your patience. A lot of you want me to hurry up and publish more often, but I do have a life besides this story. (Just teasing) A big THANK YOU for all my friends who are supporting me. I would like to offer a very special thanks to Heath and Terry. You guys are really AWESOME (my special word). There is another friend I would ask you to remember who had surgery this week on his back. He will be laid up for several weeks in a body cast. So all of you say a prayer for Mac up in Spokane, WA. I would also like to say thanks again to all who have responded to the first parts of this story. Your responses have been simply incredible. I really do appreciate all of your comments, support, and encouragement. With your continued good responses, I will not only continue this story, but will also post my other stories (Friggin Freak, Tailspin, Hugging A Tree, and Me and Guess Who) when Poor White Trash is concluded. This story is a work of fiction, although I must admit, my stories are based on experiences of my friends or drawn from a similar personal experience in my own background. Any resemblance to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental. This story deals with mature subject matter of a homosexual nature. It is not advised to allow minors to view or read this material. Reproduction of this material is prohibited without the written consent of the author which may be obtained by requesting, through e-mail, such permission. Please include any pertinent details when making such a request. PLEASE NOTE MY NEW EMAIL ADDRESS BELOW email: >scottyyates@earthlink.net< POOR WHITE TRASH by Scotty Yates Part 10 And then I felt something very softly touch my lips. It was moist, sweet and yet ever so tender. It was if the stars burst into their fullest splendor. Suddenly, my mind cleared and I realized that someone was kissing me. In a very quick movement, I brought my hands up and pushed with all my might. Whoever it was went rolling backwards over the top of my body and then off to the side. I immediately set up and looked at the body. In the light I could barely see, but I knew immediately it was Brandon. I said, "Brandon , What in the hell are you doing? Why were you kissing me?" "Billy Joe, Please don't be mad at me. I couldn't stop myself. You looked so beautiful there in the light. I just had to do it. I'm sorry. I have wanted to do that for so long. I couldn't resist." As he said this I could hear his voice crack as if he were crying. "But Brandon, Why would you want to kiss me? I'm a guy. I didn't hurt you did I." "No, Billy Joe. I'm not hurt. I ... uhhh...well I." "Come on Brandon, Out with it." "Billy Joe will you listen to me, please?" "Ok Brandon, but you had better hurry up or I am out of here. First, you take away my freedom, then my identity, tell my you want me to be your brother or best friend, buy me more clothes than I have had in my entire life and then you kiss me. What is going on?" "Please, Billy Joe just listen, OK?" "Ok." "I...uhhh... don't know how to explain this, but I will try. Do you remember the first time you saw me?" Immediately the picture of Brandon stepping out of his father's car popped into my mind. There was that jet black hair, creamy light brown skin, and those beautiful blue eyes. Dressed in a dark blue pair of shorts and jacket with a white shirt and tie and some black loafers. Yep, it was all there. "Well, I remember very clearly the first time I saw you. You were wearing a very large t-shirt which went down almost to your ankles. You had beautiful white blond hair, green eyes and you were beautiful. I couldn't keep my eyes off you. I just stood there looking at you. When my father was ready to go he had to almost drag me away. I kept turning around to look at you." "When we got back to the car and drove away, I turned around and kept watching you until we were out of sight." "I then turned to my father and asked him if we could take you home with us. I told him I would feed you and take care of you. He just laughed thinking it was funny that I wanted to treat you like a little puppy. He said, 'Brandon, Billy Joe is with his family. He is not a puppy or a pet. He is a little boy just like you. You can't take him away from his family. He would miss them and be very unhappy.' 'But dad, I would make him happy. I would!' 'Brandon it is impossible for Billy Joe to come live with us.' 'No dad, it's not. Couldn't you just ask him? We could buy him some clothes and give him a puppy, and even a pony like mine. I'm sure he would be happy then.' 'No, Brandon. That is not what makes people happy. You don't understand. Billy Joe loves his family, just as mommy and I love you. I don't think he would be very happy even with all those things.'" "I pouted all the way home and then Dad had a talk with mom. She came and told me the same thing and said maybe Billy Joe could be my friend. I wanted that to happen, but they wouldn't let me go to your house. The only time I was allowed to go was when my father went to see your dad on Saturday mornings. I made it a point to be ready every Saturday so I could go with him to see you. After seeing you I would sit in the car or get Dad to take me back home." "As time passed, it became a routine for my father to take me with him to your house, and then take me home. We talked about it a lot, but they would never let me ask you to come to my house. They told me I couldn't invite myself to your house either. If I was invited they would have let me go to your house, but you never said anything when we were there. I didn't know how to get a conversation going other than to say hi or bye. You didn't seem to want to talk with me. I thought for a long time that you hated me because I was rich and you were poor." "When I was 13 I asked my dad again if we could somehow get you to come and live with us. I argued with him that if you lived with us you could get the best education and have all the opportunities that you missing. He told me very plainly that we could never do that." "He then told me something that mom had done. He explained that after we had talked several years earlier about bringing you to our house, mom had gone to your father and talked with him about the possibility of you living with us. They saw how important it was to me and saw how I had my heart set on it." "She didn't tell your father it was because of my request, but because my mom felt she owed it to her sister and the poor treatment she had received from her family. She told him since she was raising me, that it would be no problem for her and it would give both of us the opportunity to have a brother our own ages. When she did, your father became very upset and almost threw her out. He wouldn't speak to her for a long time after that." "I didn't know that, Brandon." "No, I didn't think you did. They weren't trying to say you were not being cared for, but my mom knew how difficult it was to raise a child without a mother. She was really only trying to do the best she could for you. From then on my parents through other sources made sure you had the best education. Through the school father made sure you always had the best teachers and he donated money to the school enough money so it could have the best equipment. He wanted to make sure you had every available opportunity possible without giving it to you directly. He knew your father would not accept that." "Then my father asked me why I was so obsessed with having you live with us. I told him, 'I don't know dad. All I know is I want to be around him and be with him. It's like I am lost without him. I think about him all the time. I want him to have everything I have.'" "Then my father said something that totally startled me. He said, 'Brandon, if I didn't know better I would say you were in love with him.' As soon as he said it, he later told me that my face lit up and a smile came across my face. I don't remember saying anything, but my father said I said, 'I do love him.' I don't remember there being any more to the conversation. I know my father got up and left my room while I just sat there and realized that I really was in love with you." "Brandon?" "Please, Billy Joe, let me finish?" "Uhmmmm. OK." "I don't remember much after that, but then mom and dad started talking to me about boys and girls. I just listened. They even told me it wasn't normal for a boy to love another boy. I told them I didn't care. I said that I loved you and that was it. I wasn't expecting anything from you. I just wanted to be around you." "I must admit that I had discovered the joys of jerking myself off and did it almost every night. I found that when I did, I always thought of you lying there beside me." "Brandon?" "Just hold on a minute. Please? Mom and Dad kept after me and tried to get me interested in girls, but it was no use. Oh, I went out with some, and even kissed a few. But there was nothing there. I just didn't care about them." "Mom and Dad, after a while, even tried to see if they could get me interested in other boys. They were desperate. I only had eyes for you. Every time I saw you my desire to be with you just increased that much more." "I used every resource available to find out information about you. I even paid the kids of our household staff to get any information on you they could. When they brought me the stories about your decking Gary and Jason, I was elated. I was so proud that you could take care of yourself and you weren't afraid to stand up for what you thought was right. You were awesome!" "I have every school newspaper article that even mentions your name. I paid the kid at your school who takes pictures to give me copies of every picture taken of you. I even paid him to take extra photo's of you in your games just for me. I have a whole book of them." "I went to every game you played in at school if my own team wasn't playing. When I got my drivers license, I would go by your school and watch you get off the bus each morning." "YOU WHAT?" "After I graduated, I would drive home every weekend from college just to go to your games and to see you on Saturday mornings. It was all I could do to not go up to you and hug you whenever you made a great play. And let me tell you, you made plenty this last year. I saw them all. "Brandon." "One last thing, then you can talk all you want. When I turned 18, I went to mom and dad and told them that I was in love with you and if I couldn't be with you, then I was never going to get married. I told them I was going to try my hardest to get you to like me. No, that's not right. I told them I was going to try and get you to love me. They asked if I knew whether or not you like guys like I did. I told them I didn't think so, but that you didn't date girls either. I explained that if you rejected me, then that was it. I would still love you." "We talked about my situation and you for a long time. They made me promise not to do anything until you turned 18. They also told me they would support me in what ever happened and explained that I was fighting an uphill battle." "After that I worked out a plan to try and find out what you thought about me. I had learned a long time ago that you were always asking questions about me. That was really just about the only thing that gave me hope. Maybe you wouldn't love me like I wanted to be loved and how I want to love you, but at least you are interested enough in me to want to know about me. The other thing that gave me hope was that I noticed how you always looked at me when we visited your farm. The final piece of evidence that gave me hope was the way you always seemed to be sick whenever our teams played each other. You somehow always wanted to avoid any physical contact with me. That seemed a little strange to me. I know I didn't have a lot to go on but I was grasping for straws. There were a lot of other indicators, such as the way you would look at me, the look in your eyes when you did, and even your hesitancy to talk to me that kept cropping up, that could have been interpreted positively that you were affected by me just as I was drawn to you. Of course, there were your actions with Gary and Jason that tipped the scales the other way, significantly. I could only hope that you didn't like them and were waiting for me. At least that was my hope." "I had my father arrange for us to meet with your father last year, just after your 17th birthday." "Brandon, You did what?" "It was the hardest thing I have ever done, but I told your father that I was in love with you. I had no idea what his reaction was going to be, but I wanted him to know, understand, and hopefully support me. I knew he loved you, and wanted you to be happy. I knew if I could somehow convince him of my sincerity and that there was a possibility that you could be feeling the same, he would probably be willing to at least help check it out. He has always had a very good reputation as being very wise, compassionate, and reasonable. I was counting on that to gain his support for my plan. I explained to him that I felt you might have the same feelings towards me. I pointed out the various indicators and let him think about it for a bit. Then I told him I would at least like the opportunity to prove it. I even asked for his assistance." "After telling him all this, I was amazed when he said, he had noticed your extreme fascination with me, and that you never dated or even talked about girls. He just thought your were being a lot slower to mature sexually than the rest of the boys. He had noticed that you never seemed to be interested in sexual things." "I then told him my plan to check out your reaction to me. I promised that if the results were positive, I would continue doing what I had been doing until you turned 18 and only then would I take any action to try to get you to fall in love with me. I also told him, that if the results were negative then I would leave you alone forever." Very softly I said, "What was your plan?" "Billy Joe, do you remember the Saturday afternoon last summer when I came over and you were taking a shower?" Thankfully it was dark enough so Brandon couldn't see my face as I am sure I turned a dark shade of pink as I recalled what had happened. "Yes, Brandon, I remember." "Well, I had talked with you father and we planned that he would have you work real hard that Saturday morning and get real dirty. I knew you and he usually went into to town shopping in the afternoons and was counting on you taking a shower before you went. I told you father I would be there at 1 o'clock and he agreed to make sure you were in the shower when I arrived. I don't know how he did it, but the plan worked perfectly. When I arrived with my dad, your father nodded towards the back that you were taking the shower, so I walked around the house and came to a stop. I waited for you to look up and see me." "When you did, I knew immediately what had happened. I knew that you had showered with the guys at school so it would have been nothing unusual for you to be seen by another guy nude. In this case the fence of the shower hid the lower portions of your body but not all. I saw you go beet red, and then you hands moved to cover you front. I had my proof. I had no idea what physical reaction you may have had, but I knew then that somehow you had a physical attraction to me. That and my knowledge that you were always wanting to know things about me, confirmed in my mind that there was very good chance you had some feelings for me. It was all I could do not to jump for joy. I just stood there and smiled at you. You were so beautiful." "I don't know how long I stood there, but I just kept smiling at you. You had a look on your face which I can't explain, but I knew you were aroused. You had to be. You looked like you were very embarrassed. Finally my father yelled that we had to go, so I said, 'Bye, have a nice shower, Billy Joe.' I turned around to walk away and then turned back for one last look. I smiled again, and then I did something I had not planned on doing. I winked at you. Then I quickly turned and walked away." "I had arranged to meet with your father later, which I did. I told him what I had seen, and that I was sure you had been affected by me. He confirmed it by telling me that he had casually made sure to observe your condition when you came into the house. He said that if he hadn't seen it for himself, he would have doubted the results of the plan, but he was absolutely sure you were still aroused when you came in the house. He thought it was great." "He did!" "Yes he did. Your father loves you very much and only wants you to be happy. Well after that I began to try and figure out ways to become your friend and how I could somehow get to be around you without causing a problem. I hate everything about our system here. Just because I am rich, it is not proper for me to be seen with someone who is poor. Your just as smart if not smarter than I am, you have a great personality, and God you are handsome, but it is still wrong in societies eyes for me to associate with you. I know it is not just on my side also. It is the same with you. You can't be my friend for the exact same reasons, except reversed. Why do people do that? " "I don't know Brandon, but I know it is true at least around here." "I finally decided that being with you was going to be impossible without causing a big public scene unless I could somehow obligate you to be with me. That way everybody would accept it, and then we could get to know each other and see what would develop. I wanted you to be my friend and then hopefully we would take the next step." "I didn't want to tell you any of this now. I just wanted to get to know you better. I had it all worked out with your father that I would play him in pool and he would let me win. And he did!" "You mean my father let you win?" "Yes, he did. I could never beat him if he hadn't. Once I came up with the plan, well actually your father did, after I explained to him that I couldn't seem to come up with a way that would let us be friends without everybody putting pressure on us. We worked it out and then arranged to do it on your birthday as everybody would be there to see it and then they would spread the word. Otherwise nobody would have believed us. He also clued in a couple of your brothers so they could help control the others. I sure didn't want the tar beat out of me, which I am sure would have happened if he hadn't . You weren't watching, but a couple of your brothers were ready to come after me. If it hadn't been for Jacob, Josh, and Jerry the rest of your family would have been after my hide for sure." "I was wondering why nobody said anything or tried to help me. Why did you get my name changed? "Billy Joe, I was only trying to make it easy for us to be together. I wanted you to be like a brother, not my slave. I don't ever want you to feel like that. I thought it would be easier for both of us, especially when we go to college." "So you are gay?" "Yes, I guess so. I have never had sex with anyone. I have never wanted to have sex with anyone, but...........you. I..........will be perfectly happy just being around you. That is if your not gay, also." "You love me?" "Yes, Billy Joe, I love you with all my heart. I have loved you ever since I first saw you. I will love you for the rest of my life, no matter what happens between us." "Brandon?" "Yes. "I don't know what to say to you. I don't like the way you arranged to win me! I don't like the way you changed my name without talking to me about it! I don't like the way you have been making decisions for me! I don't like the fact that everyone but me seems to know what is going on, and I am kept in the dark! At this moment I don't know that I even like you or want to be even friends with you anymore. Couldn't you have somehow talked with me and got my opinions? Maybe I would have wanted to be your friend. If so, I am sure we could have worked around society. Maybe I would have loved you even. I am not a piece of meat or property to be bought and sold. I have feelings." "I'm sorry Billy Joe, I didn't know how else to do it. Every way I came up with seemed to be blocked. I didn't mean to hurt you. God, I am so sorry. I love you." "Look Brandon, I need to think about this. I going for a walk. But I can tell you this I am not so sure I like your kind of love when you don't consider my feelings." With that I quickly jumped up and walked off down the beach away from Brandon. As I did, I heard him start to cry. Well, let him cry. Look what he had done to me. I walked for some distance with my mind going over and over what had happened over the last two days and now with what Brandon had told me. I recalled all the incidents he had mentioned. The shower, the games at school, everything he had said he had done, the newspaper kid at school taking my picture all the time, yeah I thought about them all. Seeing it from this distance with the new knowledge, I could clearly see where Brandon had actually done his work. Now it made sense why I was so popular with the school photographer, why the school all of a sudden seemed to have enough money when before they were on a very tight budget, and why people were always asking me about Brandon and what I thought of him. Even pa had been asking a lot of questions which until now I had passed off as a father's natural curiosity about his son. So what was I going to do about? Brandon had done every thing he could to get me into the position I was in. It was clear that he was determined to have some sort of relationship with me even if it wasn't the love relationship he wanted. I know up until the last couple of days I wanted the same thing. But why hadn't he talked with me about. Why didn't he consider my feelings? Did he think he could force me to be his friend and lover? Over and over my mind I relived every moment of the last hour and what he had said. All the effort and money he had spent getting information on me. I recalled ever little detail of our meetings in the yard of my home. All the times I looked into his eyes and saw that fire burning. I had even noticed it every time I looked at him today. Brandon had sure put a lot of effort and time into trying to get me to like him, but he hadn't talked to me about it. Was he afraid of what I was going to say? Isn't love supposed to be based upon mutual trust and understanding, then why wouldn't he consult me. Oh yeah, I know he physically excited me. There was no question about that, but was that enough. What if tomorrow I got up and he no longer turned me on, would I still want to be around him? Did I like Brandon as a person? Did I really love him? Finally, I stopped and sat down in the sand and looked out over the water. I sat and looked for a very long time it seemed, but in reality was only about 30 minutes. I continued to wrestle within myself wanting to love Brandon on one side and not to love him on the other. As I watched the water come into the beach and wash back out, I saw the sand being pushed about by the water. But as the water left, the sand always seemed to be the same, but it wasn't. There were different pebbles there this time, than the ones that had been there a moment ago. They were all getting swished around and redeposited somewhere. But the water was always pushing and trying to change the situation to fit its design. It wasn't trying to hurt or destroy the sand, but was only trying to accomplish it goal. Trying to reach its objective. It was doing it the only way it could. I stood up, turned, and walked back down the beach. When I came upon Brandon he was still sitting there in the sand crying. I looked at him for several minutes before he realized I was there. When he did, I said, "Brandon, I........." TO BE CONTINUED Well according to my proof reader I have done it again. "....mean, awful, terrible cliff hanger" were his exact words. Now I didn't think this one was mean like some of my others, do you? Nor do I think my writing is awful, maybe bad but surely not awful. Otherwise a bunch of you guys who have responded are nothing but liars, trying to flatter me, and give me a big head. If that was your intent, it worked. I am continually having to put hot towels (Or am I supposed to be using cold towels for swelled heads, can't remember which. See how you have affected me) around my head to make it return to it's natural size . Terrible, uhmmmmm! I thought all stories were supposed to have cliff hangars to keep you coming back for more. Besides what is so terrible about this one. I bet you have already figured out what is going to happen. I would be very careful there. Remember I told you early on I am known to be very sneaky. Some of you want more sex, hold your horses (well actually I hope you hold something else otherwise why are you reading this). I think it is knocking at the door. Please be patient, I am only a little boy. Don't beat me! If for some reason I haven't responded to your email then it means I never got it, so send another one. I respond to all emails, unless they are criticizing me. Those I trash immediately. That is a lie. I even respond to the negative ones. So put your 2 cents in. Take care, Scotty email: >scottyyates@earthlink.net<