Date: Tue, 30 May 2000 06:59:45 GMT From: Wayne Patrick Subject: gay/beginnings/searching-for-a-son-17 Disclaimers: Please see chapter one for all disclaimers. If you shouldn't be here, please leave. Author's note: My apologies for the delay in continuing. Time has been precious lately. There will be one or two more chapters to complete this story as promised. Thank you to all who have written. Your words have touched me deeply. ***** The phone call was brief. Ruth frowned, tears coming to her eyes. "That was Jim. He's on his way home. You better leave." Joey nodded and looked at Stephen. He hugged his mom. "Please try to call me," he begged. "Come on, Stephen. Let's go out the front door." They walked out to the car. Joey helped Stephen in and placed the skateboard on the back seat. He hurried around to the driver's side. Before he climbed in, he looked back at his mother standing in the doorway. He could see the tears running down her face. Somehow, he knew this would be the last time he would see her. He waved quickly and got in the car. The engine turned over and they drove away. Chapter 44 They reached the motel in minutes. Instead of parking the car in the motel lot, Joey chose to park around the far side of the building, where very few people would walk by and there was no auto traffic. He wanted to be able to move freely without being seen by many people. They walked along the seawall from the far end of the building towards their room. Joey stopped and looked at the ocean. His mind had churned all the way from the house. He was deeply upset by the reactions of his mother. It was as if she had become a stranger to him and this bothered him. In that moment, he felt lonely for the first time since the day he met Stephen. The idea that his entire family was gone from his life felt overwhelming, leaving him to question for the briefest of moments whether any of the choices in his life had been good ones. He so desperately wanted to believe he had done the right thing. The unsettling feelings of emptiness that he had suffered through his childhood visited him again as he clutched the skateboard that represented the sacrifices and love Stephen had for him and that which he knew in his soul he would always have for his man. No matter who you are, you are going to question yourself at some point in your life, and when it's your turn to wonder if you have chosen the right path, no one will pat you on the back and say to you, "That's okay, I've made mistakes too. You will live through this." This is one lesson to be learned alone. Stephen took a couple more steps beyond where Joey stopped before he realized that he was walking alone. When he looked back, the emotions written on Joey's face were not difficult to discern. The look suggested it was a bad idea coming back to Ocean Manor. But Stephen was smart enough to not harass Joey about the choice. As far as he was concerned, this had given him another opportunity to solidify the bond between them. The strongest part of their love for each other was the ability to say or ask anything without having feelings hurt or misinterpreted. "What's wrong, my love?" Joey turned and looked into Stephen's eyes. He found the compassion he knew would always be there. He flashed to the lovemaking they had shared earlier that day, the pleasure that had been given, and the respect and admiration they held for each other. Suddenly, everything was right in Joey's world again. As quickly as he had questioned his choices, he knew the answers, and because of the smile Stephen always had ready for him, he would never need to question them again. "Nothing's wrong. Not as long as I have you." Stephen gave Joey a quick hug and the smile returned to Joey's face. They continued on their walk back to the room. At that point, Stephen decided he wanted to check out in the morning and head back home. He was ready to face Susan's family because he knew he had the love he needed, even though the whole family could reject him. He had Joey, Katie and Tim, and Jeff and Donna. That was all he wanted. They continued along the sidewalk, approaching their room when the door of the room next to it opened. A man and a woman were walking out of the room. The woman grabbed the man by the shirt, pulling her to him and savagely kissing him. He pecked back at her and turned to lead the way out. If the beach had not been so quiet, it probably would have gone unnoticed by Joey and Stephen, but it was the only other activity going on. As the man started walking toward the sidewalk, Joey recognized a very familiar face. One he hoped he wouldn't see again. And certainly not like this. "Jim. What are you doing here?" Joey asked in shock. "Well, if it isn't the little faggot. I never thought I'd see you show your ugly face around here again. And if it isn't his sugar daddy. I see you've gotten what you deserve for protecting this little pansy." Thompson viciously attacked, the way he had always cut Joey down as a kid. Stephen's mouth hung open from the shock of the attack. He clearly remembered the stories Joey told of Thompson's cutting, hurtful tirades, but he had never seen it in action. Why anyone would be so cruel to another human being was beyond what he could comprehend. As he stood there, Thompson continued walking toward the two men, and Stephen was unsure as to whether he would do anything to harm Joey. The alarm of this thought snapped him back to the real world. Stephen stepped forward, once again protecting the boy who felt like his son from the man who should have felt that way. He had dreamed many times of having one chance at Thompson. The day Joey lay in bed after the near rape by Kevin, Stephen watched as his protégé slept and reviewed all the stories Joey had told him of his childhood. He had filed that anger in the back of his mind, swearing if he ever got the opportunity, he would vent that fury on the man who had hurt his lover so many times. Stephen had considered all the scenarios of what might happen, but to have a target as easy as this was unimaginable. One liners were coming so fast he couldn't decide which ones he wanted to use. "At least, he's not here sticking his dick in the ass of someone who he's not in love with. Do you get a group discount? How about a frequent visitor's card? How many cunts have you banged here?" The woman was shocked to say the least. "What is all this about?" Joey replied with venom in his voice stirred by the words coming from Stephen. "I'm sorry, excuse my manners. We should have introduced ourselves. My name is Joey Edwards - Jim is my step-father. This is my lover, Stephen. And what is your name, ma'am?" Joey's had learned lessons well from watching Stephen and Katie parry. And he was no longer a little boy who had to quietly take abuse from the man who kept a roof over his head. Turning and looking at Jim to see the look on his face, he proudly snipped, "Jim made me everything I am today." He paused for a second and added, "By the way, Dad," with great emphasis on the last word, "Does Mom know about all the overtime you've been putting in?" "You bastard!" shrieked the woman. She proceeded to carefully, but quite forcefully, put her knee right between his legs, coming straight up, just as she had learned in her self-defense program. "Don't ever come near me again!" She shoved him to the ground, Jim landing in the shrubs that landscaped the motel, his hands grasping his very tender, very sore crotch. The motel door slammed shut and the locks could be heard snapping tight. Joey laughed to Stephen, "I guess Jim already paid for the room in advance." Stephen nodded, laughing too hard to respond. They walked on down the sidewalk, leaving Jim Thompson lying in a position Joey could keep in his mind for the rest of his life. Chapter 45 Tuesday morning came early for Joey. He wanted to head out and make sure that he got to his classes on time. When the alarm sounded, it was Stephen who rose first and turned the buzzer off. "Let's go, sleepyhead!" He leaned over and planted a deep kiss on the lips of his boy, waiting until Joey responded before plunging his tongue in to wake him properly. "School awaits!" "Ugh!" Joey grimaced. After Stephen had lifted off of his body, Joey's eyes focused on the man smiling down at him, staring into his soul, waiting in anticipation of what Stephen's next move might be. One thing about Stephen that Joey had learned was, although Stephen was solid as a rock when Joey needed a dad, a friend, or an advisor, when Stephen wanted to play, Joey had to be prepared for anything that might happen. That kept things lively, especially early in the morning and late at night. But this morning, Joey saw a calmness in Stephen that suggested serious matters would be the topic of the morning. Joey quietly asked, "What are you going to do while I'm in class?" "I've decided that I want to be home. I don't think anyone will come by since it is a workday, and I'm ready to deal with anyone who does. I have some business phone calls to make and there are some people I really need to speak to. I feel like I'm falling behind being up here, I'm not getting anything accomplished, and I don't feel tired or weak. You gave me a good workout yesterday," he said with a wry smile, "and I'm not suffering because of it. Take me home first." "If you're sure, you have to promise not to go out without me. I'm still worried about you and I love you too much to have something else happen." Joey searched Stephen's face in the dim light of the room to check on his injuries and knew he would have to inspect in the brighter light of day. He could tell that some of the discoloring had left and that he looked more like a kid who had just lost a fight with the neighborhood bully than a man who had been held overnight in a hospital with a serious head wound. With his inspection complete, Joey pulled Stephen down for one more kiss before bouncing out of bed to head for the bathroom. Stephen watched the naked body of his man walk away from him and around the corner. He still couldn't get enough of just looking at Joey's body, studying each part, even staring at him if he felt like it. This morning he was treated to the thrill of watching Joey's tight butt muscles flex with each step he took. He admired the thighs, lean but not skinny. The more Stephen studied Joey, the more difficult it became for him to find a flaw. To Stephen, Joey was the perfect man, everything he could possibly want. There was not a single thing Stephen would change about Joey. He was incredible, and to think, Joey didn't even know it until he met Stephen. Joey had become used to Stephen's stares and was not bothered by it at all. He considered it the highest compliment. Joey had spent all of his life thinking of himself as plain, ordinary Joey, someone who everyone took for granted and didn't really consider such a great catch. He sometimes wondered who he would ever meet that would want him and want to please him. He even thought to himself that if he could ever find someone one day, it might wind up being a one-way relationship where Joey never was on the receiving end of the pleasure, where he would be the one who was never the center of the attention. Joey's fantasies were usually geared to this scenario simply because he didn't have the confidence that anyone would want him. But in Stephen, he found someone who was drooling over him and made sure that he knew it. Stephen poured praise upon Joey, sometimes to the point that Joey felt Stephen was bullshitting him. But Stephen always followed up on his words with his actions and Joey loved the actions Stephen put on him, with whatever part of him Stephen chose to use. And for all of this wonderful pleasure, all it would cost him was having to walk around with little or no clothing on and let a man just watch him as he moved about his business. They dressed and checked out of the motel, heading for home with one stop for breakfast at the restaurant where they had run into Joey's mom the first time. Today's breakfast was uneventful as they sat outside eating, Stephen getting one last look at the ocean before going back to the drudgery of work. Joey dropped Stephen off at home, quickly leaving for school. As he arrived on campus, he saw Tim walking with Katie, who flew into his arms hugging him fiercely as they met. She bubbled and rattled on, almost incoherently, until she showed him the ring on her finger. Joey grinned as he realized what Katie was trying to say, giving her a kiss and hug and then turning to Tim to shake his hand. "Congratulations! When did you decide?" "He gave me the ring as you drove away from the courthouse," Katie said. "It was all I could do to keep myself from consummating the marriage right there on the sidewalk." Tim cut in, "Now, now Katie, it wasn't that close," he laughed, "but I wouldn't have stopped you either." Katie slapped him on the chest. This marriage was going to be a wild ride. "Have you set a date?" Joey asked. "No, we haven't gotten that far yet. Actually, we ran into a problem with the first thing we tried to decide." "What's that?" Katie began, "The first thing we tried to choose was the wedding party. We can't figure out something." Tim added, "We thought we'd ask your opinion." Joey looked confused. "What do I know about weddings?" "Well," Katie continued, "we know we want you to be the best man, would you do that for us?" "Sure, I'd be honored. So, what's the problem?" Tim grinned. "You were our first argument. We both want you to stand for us. So we agreed to let you decide. Who will you stand with, me or Katie?" Joey was awed. What a choice! How could he choose between his two best friends, other than Stephen. He thought for a minute. "I've got one question." He couldn't resist. "If I stand with Katie, do I get to choose the color of the dress I wear?" He busted out laughing. Now it was Joey's turn to be punched by Katie. "Get serious. You are my best friend, and if it wasn't for you nearly getting sick over my moves on you, I wouldn't have gotten to know stud here." "Hey, no politicking." Tim chided. "Okay, I'll let you know tomorrow. Is that all right? I want to talk to Stephen about it." "I swear," Katie said, "I don't think you can go to the bathroom without him holding it for you, can you?" "Nope, wanna come watch?" "Arrgh. I'm late for class." She kissed the two men, Joey on the cheek and Tim much longer and deeper. "See you tomorrow. And you better tell that man of yours, my dear Uncle Stephen, that he isn't getting out of this either. He's going to be up there with us too." "Is he going to be the ring bearer or the flower girl?" Joey dodged one last punch before heading on to class. Chapter 46 Joey unlocked the door to the house, letting the screen slam behind him. "Stephen, I'm home." Stephen came out of the back bedroom. He kissed Joey on the cheek and hugged him. "How'd it go?" "Class was boring, but I ran into Tim and Katie. They're getting married." "Married?" "Married. She's got the ring and everything." "When?" "No date yet." He headed off to drop his books off on his desk. "By the way, you're in the wedding party." Stephen wobbled where he stood. "You're kidding, right?" "Nope. I'm in it too. Best man. Call Katie if you don't believe me." "Let's go. I want to talk to her." The walked to the market where Katie was at the checkout register. Stephen walked directly up to her, "We have to talk." She still was floating on a cloud. "Look, Uncle Stephen," as she flashed the rock on her hand. She ran around the counter to hug him. "Thanks to you, I've found the man of my dreams." "That's great Katie. But I've got to talk to you about being in the wedding. I'm sorry, I can't." "You have to. You are one of the most important persons in the world to me. I have to have you there with me and Tim feels the same way." "I just can't. I'll come by tonight. Have Tim and your mom and dad there. Okay." Katie hesitated. "Okay." Stephen frowned. "I'm really sorry, Katie." Joey and Stephen walked out the market. Joey was furious with Stephen. "What the hell was that about? How could you hurt her like that?" "I'm not going to do it." "Give me one good reason why you can't." "Susan." Joey stopped and grabbed Stephen by the arms. "What kind of answer is that?" "Joey, have you seen a picture of Susan?" "No. Do you have one?" "When we get home." They walked in the garage as soon as they got home. Stephen went directly to a box whose tape seemed to have frayed as if it had been opened several times. He pulled out a photo album, a white book lettered in gold and titled "Our Wedding." Stephen opened the book to the first page and laid it on the hood of the car for Joey to examine. There stood a young, tuxedoed Stephen holding the hands of a beautiful woman dressed in a wedding gown. For the first time in his life, Joey was looking at the woman who was able to get the attention of Stephen when he wasn't even hunting. She was stunning. His first impression explained where Scott got his good looks, but he soon realized that gene must have been very dominant as he realized many members of the Parker family looked very similar. He understood why Stephen couldn't be near Katie on her special day. He imaged that she would look almost identical to Susan. "Joey. Let me just add one thing. I think the picture says it all, except for this. I know that wedding dress is carried down in the Parker family. It goes back a few generations. If you can fit in it, you wear it. Katie is almost the same size as Susan. There is no doubt she will wear that dress the day of her marriage to Tim. I can't promise what will be going through my mind. I don't want to ruin it for Katie. It's that simple." Joey nodded and knew he had much to learn. He saw another layer of the complexity of the man Stephen Andrews. Handsome, intelligent, funny, and perceptive. So Joey understood why Stephen would back out. The question now became how to tell the family without hurting feelings. Chapter 47 That evening, Joey and Stephen showed up just as dinner was finishing. There was a happiness coming from the house as they approached, but the ringing of the doorbell silenced all the sounds coming from inside. Katie answered the door, giving Joey and Stephen hugs and kisses. They walked in and hugs and handshakes were exchanged all around. Katie and Tim were there along with Katie's parents and brothers, Joey and Stephen, and Aunt Lily who was spending a couple more days before heading back home after the wedding. Katie was blunt. "Uncle Stephen, next to my dad and Tim, you are the most important man in my life. Why can't you be in my wedding?" Joey interrupted. "Katie, I talked to Stephen about it this afternoon. I understand why he doesn't want to be in the wedding. Please, just take him at his word and trust his judgement. It would be best for everyone." Everyone was quiet. Finally, Katie's mom Sarah spoke. "Stephen, we just want to know it was nothing we did. We are sorry for last Saturday and we need to know there are no hard feelings." Stephen sat back. He hadn't thought this might be a problem. "No, it has nothing to do with Saturday. I just want everything to be perfect for Katie and I'm not sure I can live up to her, or my expectations." Just then the doorbell rang. Katie's brother opened the door and in walked Claire and Danny. Danny froze as, for the first time, he saw the damage he had caused with his anger. He bowed his head, embarrassed before all the members of the family. "Stephen, I don't know how to begin apologizing. I am so sorry. I didn't even get to say thank you for what you did at the trial. What can I do? How can I make this up to you?" Stephen looked to Joey to transmit some unspoken message. Joey nodded his approval. Stephen rose from the table and walked to the front door. He stepped right up to Danny, their noses only inches from each other. He held Danny's attention, looking to see what was there, whether he could detect any true remorse or guilt or shame. He stared for at least a minute. Stephen saw the sadness he had seen last Saturday just before things went dark. But this time, he knew anger was not going to be following it. Stephen was in complete control and Danny understood that he was going to get his punishment in front of his wife and family. Stephen waited, not moving, his brain reviewing all the choices he had at his disposal, making sure what he saw in Danny, until he was convinced that no one in the room knew what to expect. When the tension had filled to bursting, Stephen wrapped one arm around Danny's neck and pulled him right into a hard lip-to-lip kiss. With his arm behind Danny's head, he controlled how close Danny stayed to him. Finally, he released from the kiss and pushed Danny away. "There are two things to remember. The first is that in this world, love is hard to find. When you find it, whatever form it takes, you accept it. We both lost it three years ago, and to this day it haunts us. Life is too short to waste on appearances or being concerned about what others might think. Care only for the ones you love. Grab that love and never let go. The other thing is to never ever let your anger get the better of you. If you do, you will lose. Everyone in this room loves you, but your anger can drive a wedge that would split us apart. I forgive you. Please never let it happen again." Joey hadn't talked specifics of what Stephen wanted to do, but he knew big, macho Danny would be brought down to size without any violence. As if that weren't enough, Aunt Lily, the dear lady who started all the troubles at the wedding finished Danny off in her own way. "Danny, I haven't seen anything like that since you were a kid and I caught you playing doctor with your cousins. You were the most trouble of all the kids. We couldn't keep your clothes on you. You always wanted to play naked with your brothers and cousins. I can remember like it was yesterday how I walked in on the three of you completely naked..." Danny stammered, "Aunt Lily. I remember too. You don't have to remind me." The laughter filled the house and flooded out into the street. Claire hugged Danny, letting him know everything was okay, and then Katie's dad walked over to his brother, hugged him, and whispered in his ear, "You played doctor with our cousins, too? Too bad you got caught."