Smile Upon Me...
by Winter

Chapter 9:

The remainder of the day was gruesomely slow. Minutes ticked away like hours to me, while my mind was spinning like the wheels of a one-armed bandit. What I was doing wasn't rational, but then again, nothing much I'd done the last couple of days was. To be frank, it scared me, but at the same time, it excited me to no end. Maybe Nate was just what I needed; someone to make me do things instead of just thinking and planning. This whole business thing, I'd been working it out for months, but not really done anything. Then, the same day I mentioned it to Nate, it was already happening. Things like that were chasing each other inside my skull, while I did my best to finish what I'd been doing, skilfully dodging any new assignments. I found that I would have to come back the next morning to make a couple of phone calls abroad, sealing this my final deal, but other than that, my desk was clean. So I stalled, pushing papers or idly clicking away on my computer as I watched the little hand creeping towards four. I'd catch my boss the minute she walked into her office, hand in my resignation, and be on my way home. I'd cook up something nice and set the table with candles. I'd put on some soft music after dinner when we'd retire to the living room couch, and...

"You're not having naughty thought during work hours, are you?"

Carl's voice startled me, and I felt my face flush as I re-focused my eyes on the computer screen, pretending I was busily at work. My blush deepened as I realised that the screen-saver was on. Caught with my mental pants down! I heard him sniggering at me as I started stammering out something incomprehensible. He patted my shoulder.

"Relax, I won't tell on you, buddy. Wouldn't want you getting fired." He laughed, and I joined him, mock-growling at his horrible sense of humour. "Seriously, you've made quite a catch, haven't you?"

"W-What do you mean?" I asked, feeling the blush return.

"Not that I blame you, why hunt for rabbits when you could shoot an elk? Really, Chris, did you think you could tease me like that without starting trouble? If I'd been a cat, it might have been fatal."

"You... followed me? To the restaurant?"

"Yep. Had to see who it was, that finally reeled you in. Bit of a shock, there, I can tell you." I felt my hands begin to shiver, panic nearly overwhelming me. Carl must have seen it, because he dropped the teasing tone. "Chris, relax will you? I'm cool! I'm always cool. Surprised, but cool."

"Well," I said once I had my nerves somewhat back under control, "not as surprised as I was, believe me. I never thought I would fall for a guy."

"Believe it, man, you did fall. Bad case, too." He grinned. "Fell like a badger for an elephant gun, if you ask me."

"I didn't. Quit the hunting metaphors, would you?" He just laughed, and I felt myself relax. "All right, I admit it. I fell pretty hard. I'm not sure I've reached the bottom yet. Carl, this is nothing official yet..."

"Don't fret, pal. You may not believe it, but I really can shut up."

"Thanks. Thanks for being so cool with it."

"Chill, is my middle name." He leaped up to sit on my desk. "Just make sure you introduce us some time. As for being unofficial, I don't think that'll last too long. That guy runs a stock rocket, you know."

"Not anymore. He's quitting, too."

"Retiring to his private island in the Bahamas with his boyfriend and his money. That's Nathan Cowyn you're dating, he's bound to have Wall Street Journal paparazzi on his tail twenty-four seven."

"If he does, then they're good at hiding. I've seen nothing of the kind. As for private islands, if you're really prying..."

"I am."

"We're starting up a little something on our own."

"A family? You're going to adopt? Already?"

"Business, Carl." Sighing, I hid my face in my hands, mostly to cover up the fact that I couldn't stop grinning. "Were you born without a brain, or did you have it surgically removed?"

"You mean like your sense of humour? Nah, my brain's still there, I just don't want to wear it down. I only use it on Sundays, and not if it's raining."

"I give up."

"Good. When can I meet him?"

"When Satan skis to work, Carl."

"That soon? I need to rent a suit!" He got up and started to leave, but seemed to change his mind. "By the way, have you fucked him yet?"

"What!?" My jaw dropped, and my entire body froze. I'd given myself away, though, because Carl just grinned at me. I tried to make my gaze a murderous one when I got up to face him, but somehow I think my blush and my grin betrayed me. "Oh, get out of here! Go, while you still have legs!"

Before I went home that day, I really did hand in my resignation. My boss wasn't happy to see me go, but she wished me luck, anyway. Feeling so utterly free, I almost danced my way to the car, fingering the little packet in my pocket. The short drive seemed excruciatingly slow; every red light an eternity, every pedestrian an obstacle. The five minutes it took before I turned into my parking space were almost painful, and as I walked up to the front door of the house, I rolled my eyes. How the hell could I fall this far? I picked up my mail, then decided that the elevator ride would simply kill me, and jogged up the stairs to the seventh floor. Well inside the apartment, I put the grocery nags in the kitchen, then let out a deep, heartfelt sigh. After pouring myself a glass of orange juice, I went through the mail, tossing aside the obvious bills and tossing away the `special offer' and `you are a winner' letters, leaving me with the latest issue of Science. Something to read while the chicken's in the oven. As I had hoped, the frozen bird was now just about thawed, having chilled the wine bottle nicely in the process. Again, I sighed, looking forward to a nice, romantic dinner, and whatever might come afterwards. I couldn't help laughing to myself.

"Life is just too good."

"Yes, isn't it?"

Nate's voice just about scared me out of my skin. I felt my pulse speed up as if my heart was about to pop out of my chest. I swear, if he had just touched me, I would have fainted on the spot, but now that I knew it was him, I soon got my breath back. Good, because I'd need it. Enraged, I turned around to yell at him, but just one look into those deep, blue eyes, just one hint of that killer smile, and I was lost to the world. He grabbed my arm, pulling me into a tight embrace, and I just let myself melt into it.

"Hello, Chris."

"Hi." I knew this was my last chance to tell him off, but try as I might, I couldn't. "How did you get in?"

"Oh, I just asked your landlady. Turns out she's a great fan of Stormchild, so she let me in without asking any questions." Nate started rubbing my back, while he kissed my cheek. "I even autographed her copy."

"That role-playing game you make?"

"Made. I'm just about done. Tomorrow morning, then out." He let his hand slip in underneath the waistband of my trousers, running his fingers through my pubic hair. "Chris, I've got a score to settle with you."

"What score?" I turned my head so that our lips brushed together. "Have I wronged Thee, beloved?"

"Heh. Yes, you have. We had some good things going this morning, remember?"

"Oh yeah."

"Which you interrupted with business talk!" He pulled away from me, frowning. "Have you any idea what it's like to walk around with a boner all day? With nothing on my mind than how good your lips felt, down there? Boy, you owe me one!"

"Hmm, okay, I guess I do." I leaned in to kiss him again. "But what about dinner?"

"Forget dinner! Put the bird in the freezer and come with me to the bedroom. If you're still hungry afterwards we could sneak out for midnight hamburgers again."

"Insatiable creature..." I muttered while he quickly cleared away the groceries, then started pulling at my sleeve. "Hey, don't rip the fabric!"

"Oh, you bet I'll rip the fabric! I'll probably end up buying you new clothes again." Laughing, he kissed me, before ushering me into the bedroom. "Get out of them, Chris. I can't wait to see you again."

Smiling, I began to comply, slowly removing my work clothes. Nate's eyes were on me, so I decided to give him a little show. I started with my shirt and tie, loosening the tie knot before I started undoing the buttons. He had a hungry look, and I could tell that he was only half joking about ripping my clothes off. So I went slowly, taking several minutes just to get my shirt off. I left the tie on while I let him lay eyes on my chest, then I started taking off my trousers. Unbuckling the belt, opening the fly, then undoing the button, I slowly, slowly slid them down, taking my briefs with me. Crouching down, I took off my shoes and socks, then stepped out of my trousers. Naked now, except for the tie, I stood up, teasingly covering myself with my hands. This proved to be too much for poor Nate, and he stepped up to me with a growl in his throat, grabbing my arms and pulling my hands aside. Grinning like a starved wolf, he grabbed my erection, playing with the foreskin as he kissed me. I tried to hold back a giggle, but failed, and I broke the kiss, backing away. He grunted with disappointment, giving me a quizzical look.

"You forget that I owe you one, Nate." I laughed as a smile crept onto his features. "Until I've settled my debt, it's hands off the cookie jar for you."

"Is that what you call it?" he asked, grinning. "I used to call mine `Little Nate'."

"Well, then it's him and me that should settle things." I reached for his belt buckle. "Get undressed, now! I'm starting to feel exposed."

"Are you sure, Chris? You know I'm not trying to force..."

"I know." I kissed him briefly as he started to take his clothes off. "And I wasn't trying to cheat my way out of anything this morning. I just got so excited about that idea of mine..."

"All right! Mention business again and I'll toss you out of the window! Just shut up and kiss me!"

I did. He was still in his briefs, but he seemed to lose his ability to move as I kissed him deeply. It took a couple of seconds before he started to respond, but soon our lips were locked together, while we ground our bodies against each other. I felt his hands dart across my back, my buttocks and my head, and did my best to reciprocate. The sheer passion of the kiss had me literally seeing stars. Nate was taking my breath away. We got onto the bed, lying down without breaking apart, and I started to feel bold. I ran my hands across his buttocks, slipping one inside his briefs. The touch made him moan into the kiss, a moan which deepened as I moved my hand around his hip until I felt his hardness. He arched back, gasping, and with the kiss broken, I started my way down his body, licking and kissing as I went. I ran my tongue across his nipples, one after the other, making him squirm and whine, while he used is hands to press my head into him. I closed my lips around a nipple, sucking lightly, scraping my teeth ever so gently against it. Nate cried out, then pushed at the top of my head, urging me down. I obeyed, and soon I was looking at his tented briefs. A small, wet spot had formed at the tip, and I ran a finger across it, making him shudder with delight. He raised his hips, and I slid the briefs off him, tossing them away, then returned to the treasure at hand. He was just as beautiful as he'd been that morning, and I dove right in, taking him in half-way. I held him there, running my tongue along the underside of his shaft towards the tip, while I closed my lips and suckled gently. He let out a sound that was half moan, half whimper, and ever so delightfully sexy. I cupped his balls, kneading them in my hand as I took all of him into my mouth. Sucking harder, still not really sure what to do, I moved up, using my tongue as I went, until only the tip was left inside. Then I pulled his foreskin back, and the full taste of his cock invaded my mouth. I loved it, savouring it as I licked his gleans, tasting his pre-cum. Again, he let out that half-moan, and I took it as a signal to go on. I started a slow rhythm, moving my head up and down his penis while I rolled his balls in my palm, letting my other hand draw invisible circles on his stomach. It wasn't long before his moaning got louder, and his hips started jerking as he tried to force himself deeper into my mouth. I knew he was getting close, yet I kept up my rhythm, not wanting to miss his orgasm.

"Chris, you'd better back off..." he moaned. "I mean it, man!"

I almost laughed out loud. Back off now? My only reply was to suck harder, grabbing the base of his cock as I made myself ready to accept him. He cried out, and I felt a hard, warm jet of semen hit the roof of my mouth, quickly followed by others. I held it in my mouth, tasting it. The texture almost made me gag, but the taste was good, almost intoxicatingly so. It was one of the sexiest feelings ever in my life. I swallowed, again marvelling at the turn of events. If someone had told me a week ago... Soon, all too soon, his orgasm abated, and I swallowed again. He stroked my hair, whispering something unintelligible as I crawled up the bed to kiss him deeply. We stayed there for a long time, him trying to find his way down from his peak, me too aroused to even move. In the end, though, he rolled on top of me, gazing deep into my eyes.

"Chris, I want you."

"I'm all yours." I kissed him again. "Sure you don't need a couple of minutes...?"

"No, I mean, I want you to take me. Right now."


"Don't you want to?"

"Sure! It's just... I wasn't expecting..."

"Just wait a second."

He sat up and reached for his trousers, returning a couple of seconds later with a condom, a tube of lubricant and a lustful grin. I rolled over to lie on my back, smiling as he all but drooled over my erection. He opened the condom, then squeezed a drop of lube into it, before he rolled it onto me. Stroking my rubber-clad penis, he tilted his head.

"How does that feel?"

"Feels nice. Like it is my foreskin you're rubbing."

"A nice trick if you don't produce much pre-cum. I know you don't." I blushed at this, but all thoughts of embarrassment vanished as he stood on all four, wagging his butt towards me. "I'm ready for you, Chris. Lube me up."

I took the tube and squeezed out a couple of drops between his buttocks. He winced at the cold, then started to moan as I rubbed it in, slipping a finger into his anus. Remembering how he'd done it, I searched for his prostate gland, soon feeling a hard little nub against the tip of my finger. Nate's entire body shuddered as I touched it, and I started up a rhythmical, gentle rubbing which I only interrupted when I added a second finger. I kept on stroking his insides, relishing in his body heat. Leaning my chest on his back, I kissed his neck, letting my other hand caress his chest, taking my time to stroke and pinch his nipples. I wanted him to enjoy himself thoroughly, and judging by his contented sighs, he was. I sped up my motions inside him, while I reached for his cock, finding it hard as steel. He groaned as I started to stroke it.

"Chris, please, you're making me come..."

"What's to hold you back?"

As I whispered into his ear, I squeezed him harder, sending him over the edge. Crying out my name, he spasmed, sending spurt after spurt of his semen into my hand, then onto the sheets. It seemed to take him forever to finish, but when his orgasm finally died out, I held up my hand, licking it clean. If anything, he tasted even better than before. He tried to lie down, but I held him up, removing my fingers from his anus to his grunted dismay.

"Now you're ready for me."

I stood on my knees behind him, and pushed against him, entering him without much resistance. He was still sensitive from the orgasm, and moaned loudly as I pressed against his prostate. The feeling went beyond anything I'd ever felt before. He was so warm, so tight that I had to bite my lip in order not to come right away. I laid down over his back, wrapping my arms around his chest, and I held myself still inside him as I started to kiss and nibble his ear. Slowly, gently I started to move, rocking back and forth, sliding my cock in and out of him. He pushed back, urging me to speed up, and we managed to find a good, steady rhythm. I made sure I rubbed his prostate with every stroke, and we were soon both moaning, sighing and grunting, competing in the art of noise-making. Time seemed to freeze as I let intense pleasure wash through me, emptying me of all but love. Love for this wonderful man. Seconds seemed like hours, as if we were in a world of our own. All the sounds were made by us, all the movement was our slow love-making. Then it all was replaced. It felt as if it started in my fingers and toes; a wonderful feeling, a breathtaking foretaste of my orgasm that made every hair on my body stand on edge. It moved closer, a mountain of pleasure I had to climb, before I could toss myself off its peak. Then Nate cried out, a roaring noise that made him spasm, clenching his muscles tightly around me, hurling me towards that peak with a frightening speed. I heard myself yell something, I think it was his name, then I came, every ounce of energy in my body focused on one thing; to ejaculate. It went on and on, seemingly forever, but eventually it abated, and I fell over. Nate fell with me, so I ended up spooning him, both of us panting as we tried to catch our breaths. He recovered first, and slid off me, kissing me while he pulled off the condom. I heard a wet sound, followed by a muttered curse as he missed the wastebasket again, then he was back with me, holding me closely. I threw my arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace as I whispered into his ear.

"Nate, that was..."

"...fucking great," he filled in. "Or great fucking, I can't really make up my mind which. Damn, Chris, three times in a row! You're really a wonder."

"I love you, Nate," I panted, still not quite within myself yet. "I love you."

"I know. You just showed me, beyond a doubt. I love you, too." He kissed me, then pulled at the bedspread to tuck us in. I grabbed his hand to stop him. "You still want more? Don't kill me, Chris."

"No, not that. I just remembered something. Wait a second." I sat up on the edge of the bed, and reached for my trousers, digging through the pockets before I found what I was looking for. Nate had propped himself on his elbow, looking at me with a curious glint in his eyes. I fidgeted for a little while, then laid back down, moving closer to him. "Nate, I... I don't really know how to do this. I never thought... I just don't have a clue. Call it impulse, romance or just plain silliness, but..."

"But... what? You're not making sense, love."

"That's just it!" I said, almost laughing at his puzzled look. "Love. I love you, more than I've ever loved anybody. I want to be with you, Nate. To be your mate, boyfriend, spouse, whatever you want to call it."

"Oh, Chris! It doesn't matter what we call ourselves. As long as we're lovers..." I touched a finger to his lips, hushing him.

"As long as... Nate, I want it to be as long as our lives." I opened the little box I was holding, showing Nate the two plain gold rings inside. "Will you be my... whatever?"

"Chris..." The look of slight amusement was suddenly gone, replaced by an air of equal part shock and happiness. Tears started running down his cheeks. "Chris, I don't know what to say..."

"Yes or no are the usual choices..."

"Oh, silly! Yes! Yes, of course! B-but I..."

"Nate, what's the matter?"

"I've never been asked this before." He hugged me tightly, kissing my cheek. "Nobody's ever loved me enough to..."

"Well, I do love you this much." I kissed him back, tasting his salty tears. "I want to stay with you forever."

"Chris, I will be your whatever, I promise you right here and now to love you until I die!" He stared into my eyes, and I could feel both his sincerity and his love. It was enough to set off my own tears, as well. "Oh Chris, I can hardly believe it. I'm so happy!"

"Me too, Nate, my love. Me too. I was afraid I would sound awkward."

"Well, you did." He laughed. "Kind of. Awkward but cute. And soo loveable."

Sitting up, we shared a long kiss, by far our most passionate yet. We were both crying, but only happy tears. Nate tried on his ring, which fitted next to perfectly, and then placed mine on my left ring finger. We held them up, admiring them, looking at the way they shone, reflecting the light like only gold can. Grinning widely, he kissed me again, pulling me with him as he laid down. This time I didn't resist it when he tucked us in and turned out the light, but we didn't fall asleep at once. Instead, we just lay there, not talking but cuddling and kissing, stroking and caressing each other well into the small hours. Eventually, Nate really did fall asleep in my arms, and I held his head against my chest, listening to his slow breathing, feeling his steady heartbeat against my body. How lucky I am, I thought. To find the perfect love, in such a far-from-perfect way. I kissed his forehead, feeling him stir as he dreamt, then I closed my eyes to join him.

Aww, isn't love cute? Now for the shameless self-plugging: if you want to read more of my stories, I've got two short stories in the gay male/sci-fi & fantasy folder, called A Dark Place and The Rose Fox. More to come, too. As usual, comments and thoughts are most welcome to