PROLOGUE:

"Hi..." Abhi greeted, walking over to where I stood, nursing my glass of beer.

"Hi, Abhi!" I smiled back.

"Heard that you're leaving?" he enquired with a smile.

"Huh?" I didn't understand what he was talking about... I had no plans to quit the job. I was doing fine, the pay was good and I had no plans for a job change, not yet.

"Well, everyone is talking about it..." he went on, his eyes looking into mine, "I could hardly believe it, you know, knowing you and how much you have given to this relationship."

"Relationship? What the hell are you talking about, Abhi?" I asked, unable to make head or tail of his chatter.

"Ummm..." he looked slightly embarrassed, "Vivek and you, you're splitting, isn't? All the guys are talking about it."

"Who told you?" I asked, feeling the heat rise, I could have slapped him then.

"Well, why get all flustered dude, everybody knows about it, Vivek has been telling everyone!"

For a moment everything went black before my eyes... I was numb... and then as things came back into focus I looked at him and smiled, "Well, Abhi dear, I don't know what you're talking about but I... we, have no plans of splitting!"

"Oh, I'm glad to hear that you two have made up, worked things out. Would hate to see you part, you know..."

I wanted to scream, 'Shut up!' but kept my cool and smiled again, "Abhi, I think someone has really pulled a fast one on you... Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'll be leaving."

I never liked to party much, but had to sometimes... keep people humored, stay connected, it helped. So, be it the usual gay crowd and gay parties, or the office do's, I did take part but kept to myself and always left early. And now, I felt was the perfect time to make my exit.

Placing the half empty glass on the counter top I headed for the door when another of our acquaintance popped up, out of nowhere, and greeted me with a huge smile, "Leaving already?"

"Yes, have a few pending things to do, you know, that report for the latest project..." I said walking out of the door.

"Oh..." he said following me, "so you're working on weekends too?"

"Well, sometimes it needs to be done."

"Yeah... and really sad to hear about you and Vivek, especially after all that you did for him..."

I stopped, spinning around, my eyes blazing... "What about me and Vivek?"

"Whoa... cool it dude, it's all over the place... and trust me, we are all with you... He's a bastard and we all know what he does behind your back. It's surprising that you still put up with him..."

With tears of anger blurring my vision I quickly turned away and ran down the steps, walking towards my car.

He was sitting on the couch as I entered the house, a very young boy draped around his arms... Something that was totally new!

"Back early?" He asked looking up, disengaging himself from the half naked boy.

"Oh... sorry Vivek, didn't know you were entertaining..." I answered, my voice choked.

"Well, it was your office gay party, so what was I supposed to do, sit and fret at home, eh?"

"I did ask you to come along, but you weren't interested... Of course, I didn't know then, that you had your reasons." I said heading for the bedroom and then added, "Vivek, can I talk to you..."

"Sure Shaan," he smiled. "Now get dressed and go," he said turning to the boy.

"Mmmm..." the kid pouted, not bothering to get up.

"Honey, I need to talk to him and you just run along, catch you tomorrow."

I closed the door and sat down on the bed, my head spinning, my heart sinking... I felt the tears, but willed them down, I wouldn't cry, wouldn't show him the pain, the hurt... the insult.

He entered after about 15 minutes and came over to where I sat, pulling up a chair and sitting down.

"You could have told me instead of telling everyone else in town..." I said in a low voice, trying desperately to control the emotion.

"Well, I told them that you were leaving..." he said matter-of-factly.

"Why?"

"Because I can't remain stuck, I need variety... I never stay with the same guy for over 3 months, everyone knows that!"

"I didn't..."

"That's your problem Shaan, if you don't circulate... besides, with you I've stayed for nearly a year now!"

"You still could have told me, asked me... why the guys...?"

"You got to hear anyway, so it's the same."

"Is it?"

"Well...."

"You know that I'm a sucker for love... I was looking for a long-term relationship, not a fling... I had made it amply clear from the very beginning..." I said, the tears blurring my vision as I looked up at him. "You know I love you and only want love... and will do about anything in return. Even slut around, if that's what you ask for."

"Well, I like my freedom."

"But that wasn't what you said when you chased me all over the place, trying to woo me, impress me with all that crap..." but I didn't get to finish as my voice choked up, the tears breaking forth, rolling down my shamed face.

"Huh, you wanted to hear it, you were dying to hear all that mushy-gushy silly stuff and so you got it!" he cut in with a grin. "Besides, you were too cute to let go..." his grin wider.

At that moment I could have clawed his eyes out with my bare hands... or maybe even better, have done a Bobbit on him, wiping that smug grin off his face for all eternity. It felt so demeaning to have been used that way!

"What you're asking for, what you need, is a slave," he continued, "who will just pant between your spread thighs, giving you joy, as and when you need it."

"No, not a slave... just love and honesty," I was openly sobbing now, feeling so sick, so humiliated... so worthless.

He started to say something but I stopped him... "It's OK Vivek, now if you'll please excuse me I'll just get my things together and leave."

"Well, I didn't ask you to leave now, it's late Shaan..."

"Don't call me that, don't call me Shaan!" I hissed.

"OK, fine, Shaantanu... is that better?" he asked. "It's late now you can leave tomorrow."

"Leave? Huh... this is my house, I have taken it on rent and it was I who took you in!" I snapped, eyes fiery.

"Yes, you took me in, but over the past year we have been sharing the rent, isn't it so?"

"Yeah, and the problem is I can't throw you out, so I'll move out instead," I said, pulling out my two suitcases, "as you have been telling people..."

"Shaan... uh, Shaantanu..." he started.

"Please Vivek, leave this room, I want to pack."

He went out and I quickly put all my clothes into the two suitcases, stuffing them in... then going into the bathroom I picked up my stuff and putting them into the small bag I looked around, suddenly feeling tired, exhausted...

Walking out I picked up my laptop, cell and the car keys from the table, "I'm leaving Vivek, you can keep the rest of the stuff, I'm taking just my clothes and personal things. And about the house, talk to the owner and transfer it to your name, the rental advance for the house you can keep, I don't want it back... That's my payment to you for the services rendered."

"Bye Shaantanu," was all he said.

I sat in the car, my mind numb... It hurt, hurt like nothing had ever hurt me before... And the empty space deep inside... it was like a huge cavern... growing larger and larger... rushing up at me... intent on swallowing me whole.

Blinking away the tears I started the engine and slowly drove out of the basement parking, onto the deserted street...

The house stood silent as I swung the car into the driveway... I hoped they were home... I didn't want to drive again, go to a hotel... I needed to be with her... she would know, she would understand and only she could help ease the pain... She always understood me and that was the special bond between us, my sister and I, we never needed to ask each other anything. We never asked, we never told, we just knew...

Walking up the steps I rang the bell and stood back.

A minute later I heard a faint rustle and then the porch lights went on before I heard the sound of the chains and bolts being undone.

The door opened, "Come..." she smiled as she hugged and led me into the kitchen. "Have you eaten anything?" she asked.

"Don't feel like it..."

"Always the same..." she said tousling my hair, "Wait, I'll heat up something."

I didn't feel like arguing and so kept silent and sat there, watching her busy herself with getting the food out of the freezer and heating it.

"Where's your stuff?" she asked as she placed the plate before me.

"In the car, I'll get it out tomorrow..." I replied, wanting to hug her and cry my heart out. "Can I stay for a few days with you all?" I asked.

"Of course you can, Shaan," said my brother-in-law, standing near the door of the kitchen that led into the passageway.

"I'm sorry to have barged in like this..." I started, looking up at him.

He just smiled as he walked in, sitting down by my side.

"Now eat this while I get the bedroom ready," my sister said, serving the food.

That's when I grabbed her hand and then wrapping my arms around her waist pulled her close, sobbing loudly as I buried my face in her belly ... crying for all I was worth...

She held me, just held me, letting me work out my sorrow...

He was sorry, he said, as he took my hands and kissed them...

I remained silent... but that smile, that intense look; I could feel my resolve weaken... Still, I wanted to resist... not show him my want, not give in just yet... but, as his fingers caressed my face... traced my lips... tilted my face towards him, I just let go. With a whimper I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him close, burying my face in his broad shoulder.

"I love you Shaan," he whispered into my ears as he pulled back, taking my chin in his hand and slowly kissing me... that same passionate kiss, like that first time... I just melted.

Laying me back he slowly began to undress me and suddenly I was feeling all shy... Closing my eyes I moaned as I called out his name... wanting him to love me, take me, make me his forever...

Getting into bed, over me, he kissed me once more... my face, my eyelids, my nose... before covering my mouth, forcing the lips apart to insert his tongue... I was shaking, from head to toe... my heart beating wildly as I felt my cock rage... gushing precum with the anticipation...

I felt his hands on my arms... the strong fingers, kneading, caressing... working their way over my heaving chest... tweaking the pointed nipples... down along my side... over my hips... massaging the thighs, his knees parting them... And then I felt him lift them, over his broad shoulders...

"Look at me Shaan..." he said in a hoarse voice, urging me to open my eyes...

But tonight I felt a weird coyness... suddenly feeling shy, to look up, into his eyes and watch him as he penetrated me... entered me.... filled me with his magnificent cock...

With the burning tip lodged at my madly twitching anal opening, he urged on, his hips rocking ever so slightly. "Open your eyes Shaan, look at me... I want you to look at me...

Moaning in desperation, my hands gripping his arms, I slowly flicked my eyes open...

The room was dark... it seemed a strange bed... I was alone.

Turning my head I buried my face in the soft pillow and let out a wail, my body shaking with the renewed bout of sobbing... Oh, how I wished that I were dead... how would I live without him, without my Vivek!

End of part I