Date: Wed, 04 May 2005 20:42:37 -0500 From: Jason Leigh Subject: Up Close and Personal- Chapter 9 The story is fiction. It isn't based on any real characters, events, places and situations. There is no relationship between the names used and that of any real person. CHAPTER 9 "You're late." "I know." "You're never late." "There's a first time for everything." "Where were you last night?" "Home." "I called you at least five times." "I was busy." Jenny glared at him, "Give me a break; you, an empty apartment and your missing boyfriend's dog; what could you possibly have to do?" Shane was about to reply but he was interrupted by Debra muttering, "Could you please stop talking?" as she dabbed more makeup on Shane's cheek. Jenny stared at Shane and rolled her eyes in irritation, "Hey, I think that's enough makeup. We can't have him looking like a kabuki doll." "I don't hear anyone telling you how to do your job," Debra mumbled under her breath. "I'm sorry. What was that?" asked Jenny suspiciously. "Nothing," replied Debra innocently Shane was studying his show notes; reviewing any last minute changes that had been made ahead of today's filming. He sighed impatiently and looked up, "Jen, we're talking right now. What's going on?" "It's not important anymore. You shouldn't make it a habit, you know." "Make what a habit?" "Not answering calls. Especially my calls." "Will you get off my back for one fucking second?" She reached around Debra and punched him. Shane rubbed his arm, "Ouch! You're bitchier than usual. What's your problem?" She glared at him again, "You! That's what's wrong with me. I did you a favor and..." "Uhh... Shane?" cut in Debra. "You've got a bruise on your..." She paused and then exclaimed as she pulled his collar, "Holy Shit! Who the hell did this to you? Was there a vampire sucking on your neck last night?" "What?" His hand flew up to his neck and he rubbed at the tender spot that had been tingling all morning. He stared at his reflection in the mirror and caught sight of the purple tinged skin. Shit. Leo. He'd warned him. He could see Jenny's reaction behind him. Her face showed disapproval and he had no idea why that bothered him so much. She was still staring at her neck when she commented, "So that's what you were up to last night." Shane tried to avoid her gaze. He turned to Debra and said, "Could you cover it up, please." Debra nodded and began applying some make up on it. Shane looked down at his notes again, but he couldn't read a thing. He was anxious and filled with an inexplicable the need to explain to his best friend, "It's not what you think." "Oh please, do tell. That bastard shows up once more and you jump in the sack with him like some pathetic loser." Debra's eyes widened at this interesting bit of information and Jenny soon realized her mistake. "Could you excuse us, please?" They waited in silence until Debra left and then Shane said, "You had no fucking right to do that." "I know. I'm sorry. I'm just so mad right now. I can't believe you took him back." He looked away, "I didn't take him back." "Huh?" "It wasn't Drew." he said. "Wha... I still don't get it." Shane sighed in exasperation, "I didn't fuck Drew last night, okay?" "Then who... why would you...?" She stopped. "I still don't get it." "Jenny, I'm seeing someone else." "WHAT?" The dressing room door swung open and an assistant called out, "Shane? We need you. Three minutes to air." Shane grabbed his jacket and began walking to the set as Jenny trailed him in disbelief. "You're kidding, right?" she yelled out behind him. He shook his head. "How long has this being going on?" He shrugged. "Drew was right after all. You were cheating on him" He paused and then resumed walking in silence until he reached the set and turned around to face her, "I never cheated on Drew." The stage manager began counting down, "In five...four...three...two..." ************ She barged into his dressing room armed with bag of peanut butter cups. She offered one to Shane, who shook his head and demanded, "Who is it?" "What're you talking about?" She made herself comfortable on his desk; tearing open the bag and biting into the chocolate before replying, "Who's the vampire?" "You don't know him." "Well, what's his name?" "Leo." "I know a couple of Leos. What's his last name?" "Malone. Leo Malone." She nodded and bit into another cup, "That's funny. He's got the same name as the rock star... Leo Malone? I once dated a guy called James Morrison. Technically it's the same thing as Jim Morrison. You know Jim Morrison, right? Lead singer of The Doors? " She fell silent when she realized she was rambling. And then she started again, "Leo Malone's really hot. Does he look anything like him? If he does, then you're one lucky son of a bitch." "It is Leo Malone." She smiled, "Yeah right." Shane said nothing. "You're kidding me, right?" He shook his head. Jenny's mouth fell open. Shane took a couple of seconds to appreciate the sight of a silent Jenny because it didn't happen too often. But it ended all too quickly. "When did this happen?" "Ahh... maybe a couple of months ago." "And you kept it from me? Why?" She asked angry. "I had no reason to tell you." "What?" "I'm sorry, okay." "You're sorry? I can't believe you... I'm supposed to be your best friend." "You are, but it's really complicated." "When did you start dating?" "That's what I mean by complicated. We're not." "Not dating?" "It's complicated." "So tell me what's going on." Shane sighed, "From the beginning?" "That's usually a good place to start." "Fine. Remember when I went to Los Angeles on that assignment..." She gasped, "It's been going on that long?" "No. I mean yes. No... It's..." "Complicated... I know. Go on." He did. And she listened without any interruptions, except for the occasional frown or smirk. She remained silent when he got done, and he wondered what she was thinking. "Well?" "What?" "What do you think?" "Nothing." "You must be thinking something." "Not this time." She popped another cup into her mouth; chewing slowly and humming to herself. She glanced at him occasionally, but otherwise remained silent. "Jenny, stop analyzing me," he said finally. "I'm not." "I know that look. You know, and I know, that you've got something to say. Spit it out." "You never listen to me. What's the point?" "It doesn't matter." She nodded and began, "Don't get me wrong, Shane. I love you, but here goes. Are you crazy? Have you got some kind of affinity for pain? Do you secretly enjoy getting hurt?" She inhaled deeply and resumed, "Drew's got a commitment phobia and Leo... he doesn't know what the fuck he wants... and you... you've got more degrees than a thermometer. Is it just bad luck or have you got some kind of radar for men like this... men with more emotional problems than you... they actually make you look normal." "They leave you and then they come back," She shook her head in exasperation. "With tails in between their legs, and you take them back... in between yours." She jumped off the desk and began pacing around, "You can't keep doing this to yourself. It's got to end. You could have almost any man you want and you're choose a heartbreaker and a closet case. Is it just me, or is there something seriously wrong here?" Shane was rattled by what she'd said but he tried not to show it. "I'm so overwhelmed with all this, I'm not even mad at you," she finished off. "Mad at me?" "For keeping secrets from me... and I can't believe you got away it." "Sorry." "Whatever... you're not sorry. May I you a question?" "You're gonna ask anyway," he replied shortly. "Why see Drew today?" "I don't know. I'm not taking him back... He asked and I couldn't turn him down." "Why?" "I feel guilty," he admitted. "You shouldn't..." "He left me because I called out Leo's name when we made love." "Oh no!" Shane nodded and added quickly, "But I never cheated on him." "So what do you think you're with Leo?" "Drew and I are ...not really together; anymore... we're on break." "Oh, please. That's the oldest excuse in the book." "But it's true." "Does Drew know you're seeing Leo?" "No, but..." "Does Leo know you're seeing Drew?" "No, but..." "Case closed," Jenny concluded. "You make it sound so easy." "It is. And all you've got to do is choose." "Choose?" She sighed dramatically, "In the relationship rule book, you can't date two people at a time. It's called cheating, unless they're both aware of it." Shane said nothing so Jenny continued, "It's really easy." She shook her head and glanced disapprovingly at Shane, "Poor Drew." "What?" She giggled, "You said Leo's name, instead his. And when you were making love too ... how embarrassing for him..." Shane blushed as he struggled to explain, "It wasn't too bad. I think I was falling asleep and he said "I love you," but the wrong name somehow slipped out when I tried to reply." Jenny gasped with laughter, "You were sleeping when you guys were... oh no... that's even funnier than I thought." "Well, I'm glad my life entertains you." She wiped her eyes and said suddenly, "You were my fucking hero." "Who? Me?" She nodded and stared at him intently, "I thought you could do no wrong. You were the last honest guy in New York. I looked up to you... I wanted to be you...You were devoted to Drew for three years and he wasn't even the ideal boyfriend. But you still loved him. And now, it's over. You're just a lying, cheating bastard... like the rest of us." "Jen, I'm no angel." "Now, you tell me." "I never said I was. I tried to do the right thing... but things just sort of happened." "I'm not judging you... but this isn't the Shane I know. You're different now. For one, you never ever kept anything from me. "I wanted to tell you so many times..." "But you didn't," She looked out the window and said, "It all makes sense... you were so sad when you came back from L.A. I thought it was it because Leo was such a jerk during the interview." She laughed and added, "You know, just because the show's called Up close and Personal doesn't mean you've got to get up close and personal with celebrities. We're not paying you for all those extra hours you spend in bed with Leo." Shane smiled, "I don't mind working overtime." She walked to desk again and took out another piece of candy. Peeling it slowly, she remarked, "You and Leo Malone. Hard to imagine you guys together. What's it like?" "What's what like?" "Your relationship... what do you talk about? What do you do?" "Uh... we got matching tattoos, yesterday" "What? Where? Oh! Very funny." "I don't know what to say. It's like a regular relationship." She nodded, "He's a little young, don't you think?" "What?" "I know... this coming from a woman dating a guy seven years younger... but, I've always done that. Like I said, you're different now... but you're still the same." "What do you mean?" "You're repeating the same pattern." "Leo's nothing like Drew." "Really? You've spent all of 48 hours with him, and you're suddenly an expert." "He said he wouldn't hurt me... I know it sounds lame but..." "You're love with him." He nodded. "I know you want to follow heart, but listen to me, Shane. I'm the voice of reason," She paused and smiled, "I've always wanted to say that." "I'm the voice of reason," she repeated. "Get over yourself." "Okay, he's left you once, and now he's come back. Does that ring a bell?" "I can explain that," replied Shane earnestly. "He couldn't deal with it. It was his first time with..." he trailed off. "With a guy?" "Yes." "You know he's never going to come out of the closet." "I don't even know if he's in one." "He isn't gay?" "I don't know." "You should," Jenny countered. "What does it mean? Does sleeping with a guy make him gay? Yeah, I guess it does... but if being gay means falling in love with a guy... then I don't think he is." "Did you tell him?" "What?" "That you're in love with him?" "No!" "He knows. He never would've returned if he didn't think you'd take him back. Besides, you wear your heart on your sleeve." Shane pondered how much of what Jenny said was true. Was he really that obvious? Did Leo know just how much he felt for him? He seriously doubted it. "Can you really handle a guy like Leo?" "What do you mean?" "I don't know him, but I read magazines and he is one wild child. His lifestyle... drugs, women, rock... you've got nothing in common." She leaned over the desk and took Shane's hand in hers, "I don't want you to get hurt," she began earnestly. "You've never liked anyone I dated." "That's because they're never good enough for you." "You don't know him..." "What if he OD's again?" Shane fell silent. "He's a drug addict. He's been one for years..." "When he's with me..." "Well he isn't with you now, is he? And he isn't going to change just because of you. Damn it, Shane! He's the poster child for rock and every negative thing it stands for. Well, except the music. He's a great singer. Hey, do you think you could get me an autographed copy of his new CD?" Shane glared at her. "What? There's got to be some perks to my best friend dating a rock star." She sighed and continued in a serious tone, "He'll never go out in public with you... he's got his career to think about. He isn't the first celebrity to dabble in a same sex relationship but it doesn't mean he's going to..." "Stop it," cut in Shane angrily and pulled his hand from hers. "I'm not a fool. Don't you think I thought of all that. Why the hell do you think I didn't take him up on his offer to go to L.A.?" He paused and ran his hands through his hair, "I didn't plan this. You can't help who you fall in love with. I tried to make it work with Drew, but it didn't. Now I've got a chance with Leo and I'm going to take it." "And get burned in the process?" "I'll take my chances." "So where exactly does Drew fit in this picture?" "You wouldn't understand," he sighed. "Try me." "He's my back up." "What?" She held the chocolate in mid air and "He's my fall back guy." "You can't do that." "Why the hell not?" "It isn't fair." "We're not together anymore." "But you're going to see him today because you want him to think he's still got a chance... You're leading him on." "When you put it that way..." "It is that way! Who the fuck are you, and what've you done with my best friend?" Shane reached for the bag of candy and began examining its contents. "Who do you want?" Jenny asked. "You know the answer." "Tell Drew it's over." "I don't want to." "Why the hell not?" "I told you already. What if Leo doesn't want me? I know he does now... but later... if he doesn't, I'll have no one. And Drew... well he'll always be there. And if I end it now..." "You can't do that to him." The room was filled with an uncomfortable silence and then Jen made her way to the door. She paused and said, "No matter what you do, Shane. I've always got your back." She shut the door softly behind. A moment later, she burst back in. With a silly grin on her face, she grabbed her bag of Reese's pieces and walked out again; leaving her best friend behind with a lot on his mind. *********** Shane inhaled deeply and pushed the door open. He was welcomed by the aroma of fresh brewed coffee, spices and warm pastries. He remembered meeting up with Drew here during their lunch breaks; their relationship had been great, and they'd enjoyed basking in the glow of newly found love. He wondered how three years had gone by so quickly, and he felt dismayed that it had all come down to this. He caught sight of a swaying ponytail in a corner booth; its owner's head moving up and down in rhythm with whatever music was playing in the headphones. He smiled and made his way towards Drew. He tugged on the ponytail, startling Drew who turned around with an annoyed expression. He smiled when he discovered it was Shane. He pulled out the headphones and stood quickly. His hands moved to Shane's waist, drawing him in for a kiss. Shane stood still, letting Drew take over. It felt good. He closed his eyes; enjoying the soft lips pressing down against his, and when the insistent tongue rubbed against his lips, he let him in. It felt like they'd never been apart... like everything was perfect. His fingers tightened on the back of Drew's neck as he sucked gently on his tongue. Shit! He was enjoying this too much. He pulled back and pushed Drew's hands off his waist. Drew was amused. He was used to Shane's erratic behavior and thought nothing of it. He was pleased that he'd gotten Shane to come here because it was the first step in beginning their relationship again. Shane hadn't backed away from the kiss... immediately... so he felt that they were off to a good start. He smiled at Shane, "It's good to see you." "Good to see you too," replied Shane. He licked his lips, tasting the lingering flavor of Drew on his lips. He glanced at Drew's steaming cup, "Cinnamon hazelnut latte?" he guessed. Drew smiled, "Close. It's Cinnamon almond." "Oh, okay," replied Shane. He sighed inwardly when he realized that after three years of dating, all they had talk about on their anniversary was gourmet coffee. This should be easy, he concluded. ************* Thanks for writing, if you did. I know I promised a couple of you guys that I'd have this out on Monday. Sorry. Busy with finals. Email me. I'd love to hear your thoughts- jayse@mindless.com.