Date: Wed, 21 Jun 2000 08:06:55 EDT
From: LissaAGreen@aol.com
Subject: A Love So Blind chapter 9

Back To Jason...

    It was around eleven when I finally woke up. I guess I didn't sleep well
last night. I was up pretty late with Tommy, talking, go over old times,
looking through our year book. Plus I had another nightmare.
This time the dream was much different.

The setting was the same, the surroundings where the same, but the couple at
the table were different. It wasn't Lance and I sitting along having dinner,
it was Lance and JC.

Was the dream telling me something? Was someone trying to tell me something?
Obviously something I didn't want to believe or hear because I would have
figured it out by now.

I was just about to crawl out of bed when there was a knock on the door.

"Hay sleepy head, you Mom to get your ass out of bed, it's lunch time
already. You all right?"

It was Tommy. he looked liked he'd been up for hours.

"Yeah I'm fine, sorry I didn't mean to sleep so late."

"It's okay. if you still want to pic up some roses today, I'll still go with
you. But please come down soon, Sandra has been beating my ass in Playstation
all morning, it's really embarrassing."

"Ha ha, my kid sister finally met her match!"

"Hay, I just been out of practice. With studying and looking for a job, you
don't have much free time."

"How is studying coming along?"

I asked while I crawled out of bed. I was in my boxers, but I wasn't
embarrassed and neither was he, we've seen each other in less before.

"Exhausting. I'm so glad we got this week off. I've applied at so many
different places it isn't funny. No answer yet."

"Don't let bother you buddy, you always seem to find what your looking for."
"Not all the time."

I pulled out a pair of jeans and a gray sweater that I got for Christmas.
I was shocked by what Tommy just said. I was always sort of jealous of him.
He seemed to have a perfect life. He was the one going to collage along with
a degree. not to mention he was voted most likely to succeed back in high
school. He never seemed to be confused about what he was going to do next,
it's like he had everything planned out.

"What is that your missing? I mean, you got the brains, the looks, and the
money what else is there?"

"Family Jason. I'll never have one. Do you know when I come out here my dad
wouldn't even look at me? He still against the fact that I'm gay. My Mom
however was nice and loving like she always is. She offered me to stay at
home but I couldn't, not with my dad around."

"I'm sorry Tommy. if it makes it any easier on you, you were always a part of
my family. My parents love you, and my sister, she adores you."

"Well, maybe she should at least let me win at a video game now and then so I
can feel better about myself."

I laughed at Tommy's remark. I suddenly felt sorry for him though, but
grateful for having a great dad I have. I was more nervous by his reaction
then by anyone else's.

"I really appreciate you guys letting me stay here, and I do feel like your
my family."

"Don't go and get sentimental on my Tommy."

I couldn't help it though, I gave him a hug and welcomed him Tommy family,
even though he knew he was welcomed any time.

"Come on bud, let's get downstairs and eat, I'm suddenly starving."
I padded Tommy on the back and followed him out of the room.

My Mom was putting the silverware on the table. My dad was reading the
newspaper, and Sandra was talking on the phone.

"About time you woke up," my dad grunted.

"Sorry, really, I didn't mean to sleep so late."

"You got a phone call this morning Hun," said my mother.

"Who was it Mom?" "Lance," "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Sorry, he said to call him later on. Does Tommy know about him?"

"Yes, Mrs. Kerrens, I do."

"Hay brat when your done with the phone let me know okay?" I called to my
sister.

"You'll have to ask nicer then that."

"Please?"

"Sure hold on."

"What's for lunch Mom?"

"Hamburgers. Special request."

I looked over at Tommy. He shrugged his shoulders.

"What can I say? I can live off of these, and your Mom is a great cook."

"Don't kiss up Tommy, you're already staying with us."

I chuckled at my Mom comeback.

"No, it's true. I like it even better then my mom's cooking."

"How is your mother?"

"She's fine. She sends her love. She herd what happened to Jason, she was
devastated. My dad also send his regards."

"You guys still on none speaking terms?"

"Dad, don't."

"It's okay Jas, actually he was a lot friendlier when I came down this time.
but I just couldn't stay there. Which is why I am so grateful to you guys for
letting me stay?"

"It's always nice to have you around. how's school going?" asked my mother.

"Great! I'm almost done with finals. I have to go back Friday actually to
study. I don't think I'll get much done here."

"Your going back Friday?" I asked in shock.

"Afraid so bud, I'm sorry, but I really have to past this next test."

"But that's only in three days."

"I know, I wish we had more time to hang out. I'll come back in the summer
though. That is if you'll have me."

My Mom smiled. "Of course we'll have you. Your like part of the family."

Tommy smiled at that. That's just what I told him upstairs. I think he really
feels like he is part of the family now.

"Thank you," he said blushing.

"Aww how cute, you made him speechless."

I could help but laugh. he did look cute though.

"Shut up."

"Okay Jason, I'm off the phone."

"Thanks brat."

I went into the den to give Lance a call. I just hoped everything was okay
between us.

An hour ago in the hotel Lance's thoughts...

    When I woke up I found JC still had his arms around me. it felt so good
to wake up like that. I thought back to last night, our kiss, our
confessions, his confession. He loved me and I loved him too, but I also
loved Jason.
josh made me forget all about him though. When we kissed I felt so much love
for him.

    I turned around to face Josh. He was still asleep he looked so peaceful,
so sexy. You wouldn't have guessed he's been going through so much emotional
pain for so long by watching him sleep.

    I ran my fingers through his dark brown hair. And rest my arm on his
chest. It was then decided I had to do something about this. I decided who I
wanted to be with and it killed me.
I gave Josh a kiss on the cheek and went to use the phone. I just had to talk
to Jason.

Back to Jason, now...

"Hello?"

"Hi Lance?"

"Yeah, hay Jason."

"Hi, Mom said you called this morning, I'm sorry I wasn't able to get your
message until now."

"It's okay."

"Did you want something?"

"Well, I just wanted to apologize, I'm sorry for yesterday. I was wondering
if we could get together sometime today, maybe go to that restaurant I was
telling you about."

"That sounds great, actually I was going to ask you if Josh would like to
come along, I still have my friend visiting, I thought maybe we could all do
something together."

"Ahhh, sure, 'll ask him when he wakes up. Mr. Sleepyhead is still in dream
land."

I laughed. It was good that everything was all right between us.

"Good, now I don't feel too bad about sleeping so late."

"Do think we'll be able to spend some time along today?"

"Sure. I'm sure Tommy won't mind, he knows about us of course."

"He does?"

"Yeah, he's actually a fan can you believe that?"

"Jerk."

I could hear him chuckle though.

"Good, maybe he and Josh will get along. He hasn't been himself lately."

He sounded worried.

"Do you know why?"

I had to ask. I mean it seemed to bothering him whatever it was as well.

"Sorta, I think he feels left out."

"Oh, then by all means invite him along. You want to go to Fanuale Hall? It's
a great out door type mall. It's most famous for tourist."

"Yeah, I herd of it. I would love too! What time will you guys be ready?"

"Can you give us till two' clock? I'll even pick you guys up."

"Sure. We'll be ready. Hay Jason,"

"Yeah?"

"I Love You."

I smiled when I herd that.

"I love you too. I'll see you then."

"Bye."

"Good-bye."

I hung the phone feeling in a lot better mood. I was in love with Lance, we
had our first disagreement, but hopefully our last.

    When we were done eating, Tommy and I went to the florist. Even though
Lance and I had made up I figured a few roses wouldn't hurt.

"So, is Josh coming too?" Asked Tommy.

"Yeah, I think so. You really like him huh?"

"Oh yeah, are you kidding? He is so sexy! Wish I knew if he was gay or not,
or even taken."

"I don't think he's seeing anyone. Lance said he was feeling left out lately."

"Aw, poor guy. Maybe I can cheer him up."

"I'm sure you can."

    We talked a bit longer about Josh and weather or not he was single. We
talked a lot about old boyfriends and love interests.

I pulled into the parking lot of Rose Petals. A beautiful decorated flower
store.
I picked out three different flowers I thought looked pretty together.
I got a rose for love, a carnation because it's my favorite kind of flower.
And a daisy because it was spring time.

"I'm sure he'll love it." Tommy said when we got back into the car.

"I hope so. How come I'm feeling nervous?"

"Your are? Don't know, are you sure every thing is okay between you two?"

"Yeah, we made up. We said out 'I Love you's' before we hung up the phone,
which we didn't say last night."

"Then You shouldn't be nervous."

The rest of the ride was in silence.
When we got to the hotel, I was shocked to see there were no fans hanging
outside.
I think it's really pathetic when fans hover over celebrities like that.

"I just thought of something," said Tommy "How are you going to be able to
see them? The clerk wont let us up there."

"Oh, don't worry, Lance left our names at the front desk. We just have to
tell them who we are and they'll let us in."

"Cool, so you ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

I said as I grabbed the flowers and followed Tommy into the hotel. I was
still very nervous, it's strange though, the only time I'm ever nervous is
when something goes wrong.