Date: Tue, 23 Feb 2010 10:37:02 -0800 (PST) From: shawn george Subject: All In My Head chpt.1 Disclaimer : I do not know the backstreet boys or any other celebrity in this story. This story is pure fiction and is not meant to imply on anyones actual sexual preferences. If you are underage DO NOT READ ! Author's Note : Ok guys this is my second series that I am starting. I will still be keeping " All I Have to Give " Going too. I'm actually working on something for that one and hope to have it out soon. Also thanks to Jenna for being a loyal reader and giving me positive feedback on that story. I know I haven't talked to you in awhile but I'm still waiting on you to update one of your stories. Ok , on to the new one, I wrote the first chapter for this awhile ago but things have been so crazy lately with work that I didn't get to post it. I will try to keep both of my stories updated more often from now on seeing as I just got my new lab top. Anyway hope you enjoy it and I want feedback People ! Lol All In My Head Chapter 1 Howie rolled over in bed as the morning sun rays bathed his already tanned skin. He got up stretched and made his way to the bathroom to do the morning routine. Another day of work followed by another night alone awaited him. He and Leigh have been divorced now for about two years ever since she ran off with his personal assistant. It didn't matter anyway he never really loved her . They were just together because he needed a cover and she needed money.One good thing did come from it though , his son James. Who he only gets to see four times a month. The Backstreet Boys have been back on tour now for two and a half months and at first things were great. Why wouldn't they be ? He was getting to travel the world, perform for millions of fans and spend time with the guys. Especially a certain tall green eye'd man that had recently made his return to the group. Kevin had been the object of Howie's desire since the moment they had met but being closeted he didn't dare let his feelings be known. So he sat back and watched Kevin date female after female untill he settled down and married one. Watching Kevin say I do was one of the hardest experiences of his life. It drove him into depression. He began to pull away from all the guys . At first they hadn't really noticed but when he'd stopped eating and started losing too much weight they stepped in not wanting another episode like with AJ. After much talking and convinsing he agreed to talk to someone about his depression. It actually did help to talk to someone who could help him deal with his feelings for Kevin. He soon recovered and the group hit the studio to record their next album and embarked on this world tour the first with Kevin in five years. They were together again like in the old days no wives, no kids , no families just each other. Howie had been using this time to bond with the guys again especially Kevin who because of his recovery he'd become the most estranged with. The two of them grew closer so much in fact that the other guys joked that they acted like they were dating ( Howie wished ! ) , Everything was fine untill she showed up. His wife claiming that she and his son Mason missed him. they started traveling with them, then Leighanne and Baylee came as well and things changed between all of them but especially him and Kevin . Seeing Kevin with her hurts Howie and he can feel himself slowly slipping back into depression and their is nothing he can do about it. Howie's P.O.V : I was putting on my shoes when I heard a strong knock on my door. I was reluctant to get up and open it for fear it was one of the guys. It was only seven am and I was already in a bad mood not a good sign. I slowly got up and answered the door with a scowl on my face " What ! " I asked irratibly " Damn D , who shitted in your corn flakes this morning " My bodygaurd Mark asked. I sighed " I'm sorry dude. I'm just in one of my moods " " I can see that. Well I'm not gonna bother you long I just came to see if you're ready to go. Most of the guys are downstairs in the restuarant having breakfast " he said " Ok , just let me grab a jacket " I said back. I grabbed my jacket , wallet and keycard and walked out of the suite followed by Mark. We were halfway to the elevator when I heard a voice that made me visibly tense " Morning D " He drawled. I turned around to see Kevin walking toward me with that fake Blond Barbie hanging on to his right arm " Morning Kev , Kristin " I said resisting the urge to go over and break the side of her body that was hanging on to him " Where is Mason ? " I asked " Bri took him down with him and Baylee. Your the last one up this morning. Late night ? " Kevin asked grinning " You could say that " I said back as I pushed the button for the elevator. It was true I was up all night but not for the reasons he thinks. Lately I've been having trouble sleeping and when I do it's hardly a good sleep. I usually spend more time tossing and turning than actually resting. " What's her name or did you even bother to get it ? " he asked me " Baby , Don't ask him that. I'm sure it personal " Kristin butted in " Nonsense , we tell each other everything right D ? " Kevin asked " Right Kev " I said back " See " Kevin said smiling at her as he threw his other arm around my shoulders. The elevator dinged and the doors opened and we stepped in, Kev's arm still around my shoulders. Kristin had pulled away from him chosing to bother Mark with useless conversation. It felt so good to have Kevin touching me. It took every bit of will power I had not to lay my head on his shoulder and sigh contentedly. " So you gonna tell me or what ? " Kevin asked me leaning over to whisper in my ear. I shivered from the unexpected contact of his warm breath on my ear. He looked at me and raised an eyebrow having felt me damn near convulsing against him. Way to go Howie how the hell are you gonna talk yourself out of this one. Just as I was gonna speak the ding went off again and the doors opened. We all stepped out the elevator and I looked at him " Maybe someday , Kev " I told him longingly " I'll be looking forward to it " He said with a wink. He took his arm from around me and grabbed Kristin's hand and walked into the restuarant. TBC