Date: Tue, 1 Jul 2003 11:13:52 -0700 (PDT) From: JACK BROWN Subject: Brian and Jack /part 21 ********** Well, here we are again, another chapter. I hope that you enjoy this chapter. I received many mails, but I haven't had the chance to answer all of them, but I promise I will. This part of the story will be like an end to the first part of Jack's life with Brian. If you want it to be the real END, then just drop a line. I want to continue but it depends if you guys want to know what happened to Jack. I think I've bored you enough now, hehehehe. ********** The following morning I got up really early. I was determined to talk to Brian before I went to work. I wanted to make sure that I would be able to talk to him, and that's why I wanted to go early to his place. I showered and then I got dressed. I called Daniel and explained that I would be late that day. I wasn't sure if I was going to be late, but I wanted to have plenty of time to talk to Brian calmly. It must have been around 7 when I left home. My brothers were still asleep and I didn't bother to tell them that I was going to visit Brian before I went to work, since they didn't know that we had fought the night before. Anyway, I arrived at his place a few minutes later. On my way there, I had prepared what I was going to say. I wanted to tell him that he was very important to me, but I also wanted to make clear that my job was important too. I had tried to choose the words correctly in order to solve this problem, instead of making it bigger. I parked my car in front of his building. The porter, Hugh, opened the door for me and then I went inside. Nervously, I made my way to the elevator and then I waited. It didn't take me long before I was at his door. I knocked and then a while later he opened the door. I could tell that he had not slept that well. He opened the door and when he noticed that it was me, he just went inside leaving the door opened. I wasn't sure if he was still mad or what, so I went inside. He went to the kitchen and I followed him. I could tell that he was about to leave, since he was all dressed up. "Can we talk?" I said as he poured some coffee in a cup "Go ahead" he replied as he handed me the cup and served himself another one "talk" "Well, I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for what happened last night" I told him as I sipped my coffee "Listen Jack, I'm sorry too" he said "but I still think that you work way too much" "But Brian" I explained "that's what I do for a living, I have never ever told you anything about your work" "But it's different" "How is it different?" "Well, I'm in show business" he said smiling "I can do whatever I want" "That's not the point" I said as we both walked to the main room "the thing here is, that you think that I put my work before you and you know that is not true" "But you do it all the time" he said and I could feel that we were getting into argument again, instead of solving anything. "What is really the problem here Brian?" I said as I sat down on one side of the couch "This job is important to me, don't you get it?" I explained "I like it and I'm really good at it" "I get it and I'm happy for you big time, but I'm just getting tired of having a relationship with your answering machine" "It's only been a week!" I told him trying to make him realize that he was making a big deal out of everything. "Is it because you're sleeping with Daniel?" Brian asked out of the blue and that's when I snapped completely "Oh my god!!" I said getting from my seat "I can't believe I'm hearing this" "Ok I guess you're not" Brian replied knowing that he had pushed the wrong button "Oh my god!" I said again "I cannot have the same conversation over and over again, you're making this too hard" "What conversation?" "You always think that I'm sleeping with someone else and I'm getting tired of it" I snapped. I was really upset by then "maybe we should take a break" "You're right, let's cool off" he said as he headed for the door "A break from us" I told him as he looked at me, then he closed the door behind him. As soon as he closed the door, I became conscious of what I had said. Was I serious? I don't know why I had said that but it must have been for a reason. I walked out of his place hoping that I would be able to find him, but it was too late, he was gone. I got into my car and I wasn't sure where to go. Several unanswered questions started flooding my mind. I decided to go to the office to take my mind off Brian for a bit, hoping that I would be able to find an answer to all of my questions if I was calmer. I drove to the office and as I went inside, Daniel noticed that I was a bit disturbed. He asked what was wrong but I really didn't want to talk about it at that time and he understood immediately. I knew that if I wanted I could talk to him at any time. The rest of the day was even worse. I could not concentrate at all, I mean I was having such a hard time making the designs and I could hardly focus. I had only about a dozen left and I knew I had to finish them for the presentation the following day. Daniel kept asking me if I was ok and I explained that I really didn't want to talk about it, but I told him that I had had some serious problems with Brian. He understood perfectly and never asked again about the matter. I knew I had to put my problems aside for a while so I decided to concentrate on my work. It was hard at first but as I got into it, my mind focused on it. Daniel and I worked hard to finish the remaining designs and I made some slight changes to some of the ones that were already made. Nick called me around noon cause he wanted to know what had happened with Brian and me. He said he had tried to talk to Brian, but he refused to talk about it. I wasn't sure if I should tell him, since Brian had not said a word, but Nick was my friend and I trusted him. I explained what had happened and he listened carefully. "Nick" I said "I don't even know why I said it, I don't want to take a break" "Then don't take it" he replied "I think you should buy him something, maybe flowers and go to his place tonight. Try to talk the two of you calmly about what's going on" "But we've tried and it didn't work" "You need to solve this mess Jack, the two of you, but if you want I can be there too, so that you two don't tear to pieces" "I think you're right" I told him "I think I'll pay him a visit tonight, but it's actually a good idea that you come along" "Ok, so I guess I'll see you later tonight" "I think I'll go around 9" I explained "because I want to buy him something before I go" "Well, I'll see you around 9 then" "Thanks Nick for your advice" I stated "That's what friends are for, well, I've got to go now" "Ok, see you tonight" "See you, bye" he said as he hung up. As I hung up, I felt a little bit better. I was actually glad that Nick had called me. Daniel and I continued working the rest of the day until 7:30. I looked at my watch and noticed that it was already half past seven, so I decided that's it was time to leave. I cleared my desk and then I told Daniel to do a couple of things before he went home. We had all the designs ready for the presentation. I was actually very proud of myself since I had managed to finish everything on time and they were actually really good. Anyway, Daniel stayed in the office a little bit longer. I was about to go straight to Brian's place when I remembered that I was going to buy him something. I looked for a gift shop, but I couldn't find any. I drove around for a while, until I found a cute little store. I parked my car in front and then I went inside. I wasn't sure what I was going to buy, there were so many things that you could buy and all of them looked so cute. The woman at the store came over and asked me what I was looking for. I told her that I had no idea but I was looking for a gift for a very important person. She smiled, probably thinking that it was for my girlfriend. She went behind the counter and then she showed me the cutest little teddy bear that I had seen. It was so cute and it had a great face. The minute I saw it, I knew I wanted it. She was pleased to see that I had liked it. Even though the teddy bear was great, I wanted to buy him something else, so I told her that I wanted a bouquet of roses. She went over to where the flowers were and gave me the best roses she had. They were red roses. I was very happy that the gifts were cool. I walked over to where the greeting card where and picked one that I liked. I wrote a message on the card for Brian and then I paid for everything. I put the gifts on the passenger seat and then I drove off. It wasn't long before I arrived at Brian's place. I looked at my watch and noticed that it was already 8. I wasn't sure if I should wait for Nick or just go inside while he arrived. I stayed in the car a few minutes to wait for Nick, but there were no signs of him. I thought than that he had probably forgotten about it or maybe he was already inside. I decided then to go inside. I grabbed the gifts and then I went inside the building. Hugh, as usual, opened the door for me kindly. Hugh was a nice guy; he was always very kind, even though he didn't talk too much. He actually talked to you if you started the conversation. Otherwise, he wouldn't say a word to you, except `good morning' or things like that. He was around 50 and he actually knew me pretty well since I had been coming over to Brian's place for a long time now. Anyhow, I walked to the elevator and then I waited for it to open. As soon as the doors opened, I went inside. I was actually very nervous, since I really wanted to make things right with Brian and I was afraid that we got into another argument instead. To my relief, I knew that Nick would be there, therefore Brian would be a little calmer, or so I thought. I walked up to Brian's door and was about to knock when I realized that the door was slightly ajar. The lights were out and so it was completely dark inside, apart from the moonlight coming through the windows. I wasn't sure if I should go in, but I thought that maybe somebody had broken in or maybe Brian was in trouble. I don't know but many thoughts flooded my mind. I decided then to go inside. The apartment lights were off, but I didn't turn them on. I don't even know what I was looking for, but I was trying to find Brian. I could hear some sounds coming from the bedroom. I thought that maybe Brian was there. At first I thought that he was probably watching TV, but then I thought that it couldn't be, since I couldn't see any light coming from the bedroom. Then I thought that probably Brian was gagged or something. Quietly and slowly I walked over to the bedroom door. I stood at the door and I heard again some sounds. The door was also ajar, so I slowly opened it. As I opened the door, my heart broke in two. There it was, Brian slowly fucking another guy on the bed. The guy was on the bed on his hands and knees and Brian was behind him slowly fucking him. I could not see their faces very well since the lights were off. But I could make out their outlines due to the moonlight coming from the window. I was so petrified that I could not say a word. I wanted to say so many things to him, but I couldn't. I just threw the gifts at him. He looked up and noticed that I was at the door. I didn't stay there to see the expression or his face; I just stormed out of his place. I wanted to get out of there as fast as I could. Tears began to run down my face. I ran out of his place and then I stumbled on to Nick as he got out of the elevator and then I fell down "Jack?" Nick said as he helped me up "what's wrong?" "Please just leave me alone" told him crying as I got up from the floor. I went into the elevator before the doors closed. Right then, Brian ran to stop the elevator doors from closing "Wait, Jack, let me explain" he said as the doors closed. As soon as the doors closed, I just sat down on the floor. I pulled my knees up to my chin and then I cried even more. I could not think clearly. It had been such a shock to find Brian with another guy that I just couldn't take that image out of my mind. The doors the opened and then I just ran out the building. I quickly got into my car and then I drove off. I wasn't sure where I was going. I wanted to go as far as I could. I wanted to go somewhere where nobody knew me, far from Brian and far from all my problems. I was driving very fast as I cried. I drove around for a while. The streets were a bit jammed but I was still driving without direction. I could not believe what Brian had done, I mean, he always said that he would never ever hurt me and he perfectly knew what Tom had done to me and he still did it again. Right then, my cell started ringing. I looked at the caller id and noticed that it was Brian. I answered it "You know what Brian?!" I exclaimed "go to hell and never ever call me again!!!" I didn't give him time to say something. I just then threw my cell phone out of the window. I was happy for what I had done. I was so mad at him and so sad for what he had done that I knew I would not be able to forgive him. Right then, the traffic light changed to red but I didn't care, I drove passed it. I thought that nothing would happen, but then I heard somebody's horn. I turned my head and the last thing I remember are the truck's light coming towards me really fast. I knew that could not go anywhere else. At that precise moment I thought about my parents, I thought about the good times we had while they were alive. I was a bit happy to see that I might be able to be with my parents again. I also thought about my brothers. It must have been only a couple of seconds, but they seemed to last forever. My whole life passed before my eyes in a blink. I knew I had had a very happy life and I was glad that God had given me the chance to be in love a few times. I was a very fortunate person and I was glad for what I had achieved during my life. I closed my eyes and then everything went black... The end?? ********** Do you think this should be the end? I think not, but if you think it must, then just drop a line and tell me what you think. I still want to write some more, but it's all up to you guys... jack_ga_2002@yahoo.com your friend Jack "enjoy life and always be yourself"