Date: Thu, 27 Jul 2000 06:05:23 GMT From: J M Subject: Angel's Wings 2 Angel's Wings (Part 2) Written by JM --- Da da da da da... what to write, what to write? Hmmm, it's about celebrities... yeah, that sounds good. Two very moral celebrities too... ooh yeah, that makes it better. Let's see, what else... oh yeah, these two male celebrities are together, but that has nothing to do with their actual personal lives. Ha ha, oh yeah, forgot this one... it's fiction ALL THE WAY! Is that it? I think so... wait, no... please be 18 or older or have your parents permission. Parental Guidance is suggested. Need some popcorn? Maybe a soda? Got to have the Twizzlers... remember, 'Silence Is Golden'! Okay, let's move on to to the previews... --- --- Rated PG-13: Hey, I'm back! That's right and I thought I could stay away. No, I prayed I could stay away, but this is in my blood. I've just got to write. Anyway, I'm glad to be back with another exciting verse in the song of Brian and Justin's lives. Please remember that these stories are based on the romance created for Brian and Justin through 'Brian and Justin' and 'Just Beginning'. This is not called 'JC and Nick' or 'Lance's Beginnings,' so please respect the fact that they will not get all the attention in the world. If you don't know by now, send all comments to: catsfan1@hotmail.com Thank you very much! Enjoy the show... --- -Feature Presentation: Angel's Wings, Rated R- ** Opening credit: Just a note for everyone, I don't know if anyone remembers the character 'Trace' from WAY back in the 'Brian & Justin' serise, but I have to correct something. That character will now be known as 'Tracy' because the real 'Trace' is a guy and appears in this story. He's Justin's best friend in real life and I wanted to throw him in here. So 'Trace' is a guy and is not to be confused with the female character of the past. Sorry for the confusion. ** June seventeeth could not have been a more exciting night. It was slowly drawing closer to the opening show on the sold-out tour for the men of *NSYNC. In the previous weeks the work and rehearsals preparing for the tour were strenuous and long. It was now a more momentous occassion for the crew preparing to leave for a couple of months. It was the night of a celebration. It was time for all the troubles of the past to be forgotten adn all the fun of the moment to take presedence. The club at Pleasure Island was the place to be. No one knew who could have been attending the club, but it still was a hot spot in Orlando and one that always got celebrity visitors. This was the definite spot for a brilliant celebration to occur. The club had a small enough amount of visitors for the celebrities to keep a low profile. Everything seemed to just flow with the music's continuous fast pace. "Looks like a party tonight!" Joey Fatone shouted out as he led the way of the entourage of friends that seemed to be mixed with large bodyguards. He crossed a few steps to glance at the packed dancefloor. It seemed as if no one wanted to to crowd the bar or the tables. Everyone had an agenda to control the dancefloor. "I can't believe your mom let us get out tonight." Jenny Morris commented toward Justin Littrell. She saw a captivating smile on Justin's face. He winked at her briefly as he tried to shrug past a few of the club goers. "I can't believe Brian let me get out tonight." Justin jested, trying to stay close behind Joey. "Man, J, you know that your boy Brian couldn't keep you locked up if he's at the studio this late at night." Trace, Jenny's boyfriend and Justin's childhood friend, remarked. Justin nodded, pulling the brim of his hat down lower. "Yeah, well, Brian isn't as worrisome as Ms. Lynn is." Veronica Finn shouted from the middle of the group. A laughter fell from a few of the female's lips. Justin furrowed his brow while walking. "Hey, that's my mommy ya'll, lay off." Justin responded before receiving coos from his friends. He rolled his eyes with his prominent grin. "Yeah ya'll, lay off Ma." Trace agreed, breaking from the group to lead Jenny towards a secluded table. Justin eyed him as he and his girlfriend trailed off from the group. "How about you guys lay off the talking and start dancing." Joey suggested, walking faster so that he could reach the dancefloor. Britney Spears strolled toward the back of the group with Lance Bass, Nikki DeLoach, and J.C. Chasez. She watched as her boyfriend separated himself from the group and hit the dancefloor. 'Typical.' Britney thought as she watched him groove with the others. She let the actions her boyfriend presented slide off. She did not attend the club with her friends to worry about Joey. She only wanted to spend time with *NSYNC and Innosense before they departed because she knew she would not be given much time off to visit them on tour. "Where's Danay at when I need her?" Nikki asked as she scooted past a few of the male attendants. She smiled at each, even waving to a few. Britney giggled wildly. "Flirt." she boasted, waving to a few with Nikki. Nikki snickered loudly, beginning to dance as they walked. "Being a single gal, she has that right." Lance noted, grabbing Britney's arm to pull her along. Britney stumbled predictably, but finally began to catch up with Lance's pace. "Yeah, well, now that you are no longer a single countr boy, you might want to watch who you bump and grind with tonight." Britney stated with a sly smile. Lance nudged her and covered his mouth. Britney laughed mildly. "What? Me? You mean I'm actually taken?" Lance pretended to be dumb. Britney rolled her eyes and pulled away from him. "That's blondes for ya." Britney teased, trying to push towards the front of the group. "Poor Danay. I know she would have had fun here." Nikki spoke up, trying to draw closer to the middle of the group. She brushed her dark brown hair back and peered through the shoulders blocking her vision. "We're not here tonight to worry about the folks that aren't here Nik'. Danay's off with her fam' having fun and that's what we're here for." Mandy rebuttled, pulling her boyfriend from the group so that the two could sequester a private booth. Nikki eyed them separate for the others and then she formed a smile. Mandy was more than right. It was time for Nikki to truly enjoy her life before she made another commitment to her career, one that sacraficed a substantial amount of her free time. Soon the sounds of Groove Armada's 'I See You Baby' began to rock the club and bring everyone from their pre-positioned seats to the dancefloor. Veronica's curly blonde-brown head perked up and a smile laced her soft lips. "This is the jam!" Veronica inisisted, slowly bobbing to the hardcore dance hit. She turned to her boyfriend, Nick James, and grinned even harder. "Oh, is this the part where we dance?" Nick asked with a cheif smile and glitter in his icy blue eyes. Veronica nodded amicably. "Come on Nik', grab a dude and get on the 'floor with me." Veronica urged while dragging her boyfriend away from the group. Nikki smiled briefly as she caught a glimpse of them moving away. She frowned on the inside. Being single again did not affront Nikki many opportunities to dance or even be held by someone that cared for her. She did not long for the feeling again because she had become a strong woman due to her relationship failures. She only missed the feeling at times, especially at night. Nikki felt a warm hand caress her shoulder and then pull her back a little. Nikki turned her head to the side and caught a quick glance of a pair of warm blue eyes. "I know you don't want to just sit around while everyone dances... at least I don't." J.C.'s tingling voice rang through Nikki's ears, sending a shiver through Nikki's body. She felt goosebumps line up her arm as she felt his warm near her. She smiled indifferently. "What do you suggesr Josh?" Nikki asked, standing stiff as others began to pass them by. She kept her eyes forward. She could spot Veronica and Nick nearby and Jenny and Trace at another end of the floor. "Come on, let's dance Peaches." J.C. replied quickly, beginning to escort Nikki toward the massive dancefloor. Temptation took a tight grasp on Nikki's mind and allowed her to follow J.C. "Somebody needs a drink around here." Chris chimed as he skid past a few club attenders to a corner his friends occupied. He carried a few glasses and bottles in his arms as he moved. "I think that somebody is you." Mandy giggled as she pulled a glass of Strawberry Daqauri from his arms. She carefully led it away from Chris and to her lips, craving something to quench her thirst. "No, no, no. I'm the good guy." Chris said with an evil grin. Mandy glanced down to a glass of beer in Chtris' arms. She looked back up to his dark brown eyes with doubt. She pouted her lips as her boyfriend, Bryan, pulled a glass of Daqauri from her hand. Chris shrugged, knowing that no one had requested the glass of beer. "Here ya go." Chris said, handing Justin a bottle of Heineken and easing by Mandy. Justin slowly took a grasp of the bottle, watching as several people crowded the dancefloor. He took a small swig off of the bottle, keeping a strict eye on his friends. "Wow, Trace's really tearing it up out there." Bryan commented when lowering the Daqauri from his own lips. Mandy took a look at the dancefloor and watched as Justin's friend danced breathless with her friend. She smirked. "Hmmm, he's not doing half as good of a job as ol' Joey. there" Lance giggled while pointing down to the flirtatious, but clumsy dances being done by Joey. Britney's ears perked up when she heard her boyfriend's name fall from Lance's lips. Justin took another large gulp of his beer, glancing down at Joey. The realization hit him quicker than his body could move. Chris made ammends for Justin's slow movements, quickly elbowing Lance roughly in the ribs. Lance doubled over briskly as Britney pushed Chris and him aside to look over the balcony. She spotted her boyfriend with her now green eyes. She eyed him as he danced and spied to see who he danced with. She took in her lower lip with anger. Her cheeks were no longer a flattering red shade. She was indubitably jealous. Justin sighed. He saw Britney slowly beginning to back away from the railing with a sharp and clear hurt expression. 'Fuck Joey.' Justin grumbled in his mind, gripping his Heineken bottle tighter. He skid toward Britney, his head lowered. He could see that she distanced herself from everyone in a quick fashion. He eased up against her, wrapping his strong arm around her smaller body. Britney took in the warm comfort, breathing in Justin's cologne. "Don't sweat it girl. Joey's just having a little fun like he always does. He just needs to get it out his system before he departs for the road." Justin tried to defend his friend in a typical manner. He could tell that Britney struggled with forgiveness. It was understandable. He shook the liquid inside his bottle around, trying to give his friend time. The sounds of a familiar club favorite drew Britney's attention from her boyfriend and his actions. She heard the distinct voice that Beyoncé Knowles possessed sweep over the speakers and the off-the-wall beat hit each inch of the club. A shout from several females and a few men signified the importance of the song the DJ was beginning to spin. Ladies leave your man at home The club is full of ballers and their pockets full grown And all you fellas leave your girl with her friends Cause it's eleven-thirty and the club is jumpin', jumpin' Though he say he got a girl Yeah it's true you got a man But the party ain't gon' stop So let's make it hot, hot Britney's head jerked up and a vengeful grin covered her lips. She shook out of Justin's small embrace with her and turned her head in his direction. "Dance with me." she insisted, yanking the bottle of beer from Justin's left hand. Justin let a surprised expression dangle on his face. He observed Britney slam the bottle onto a nearby table and pull up her lowering halter top. She tosseled her dity blonde hair for a brief second and then eyed Justin. Justin still stood with uncertainty. "Come on Just, you know you can't resist a good beat." Britney cackled, nudging him softly in the side. Justin sighed stubbornly. He lifted his hands to adjust the white bandana on his head as his friends began to disburst. "Okay, I'll give you this one dance you goofball." Justin responded, lowering his hands so that one could snatch up her's. Britney smiled uncontrollably as he held her hand and led her in the direction of the dancefloor. Call your boys cause tonight you're not gonna stay at home Should tell your girl she ain't comin' tonight You're goin' solo Cut her off cause she talk some noise You know you got the right to get your party on So get your haircut and get your car washed too Lookin' like a star in your Armani suit You need to look your best cause you're turnin' heads tonight You're gonna find a sexy chica that's gonna dance all night If you wanna Though he say he got a girl Yeah it's true you got a man But the party ain't gon' stop So let's make it hot, hot Ladies leave your man at home The club is full of ballers and their pockets full grown And all you fellas leave your girl with her friends Cause it's eleven-thirty and the club is jumpin', jumpin' Justin let Britney dance dangerously close to him on the dancefloor. He was not ashamed to feel the touch of a woman, but he did not desire like he did for Brian's touch. He placed a hand on her hip and began to dance with her as the music took a quicker pace. He girated his hips as he would on stage and let the sweat from the heat of the room wash over his body. He scrunched his face as he began to truly enjoy the pleasure of the music. Nearby, Nikki and J.C. held a similiar stance, but a little closer with a little more affection. It was too strange for them. They were under the music's trance and for them, it felt like the memories of the past hd trapped them in a position together. "Oh my God, is that J.C. from *NSYNC?" J.C. could hear a nearby voice utter the statement aloud. "Is that his girlfriend?" another female's voice invaded the dancefloor. "Probably... I heard he was dating her." the first voice responded with arrogance. J.C. ignored the sounds coming from their mouths. He stayed close to Nikki so that he could relish the song and dancing with his ex-girlfriend. "Don't pay them any mind." Nikki whispered into J.C.'s ear, petting his face as they danced even closer. J.C. shot her a smirk. "Okay." he breathed out as sweat trickled down his forehead. Bounce baby, bounce, bo-bounce bounce Twirk it, twirk it Shake baby, shake sha-shake shake Work it, work it Twist baby, twist tw-twist twist You better dip that thing Justin could feel the eyes of several of the female club goers on him and Britney. He wrapped his arms around Britney's waist and looked down into her eyes. "We're being watched." Justin whispered, dancing a little slower. He did not like the feeling of people spying on him. Britney lowered her brow and mouthed, 'I know.' She rotated her head to the side, also feeling the strain of the public eye. She sighed hesitantly, drapping her arms around Justin's neck. "Now people will really think we're together." she said quietly, reaching her voice over the music and into Justin's ears. He nodded. He continued to dance as the beat was slowly fading from the speakers. He glanced to his right and then his left. "They're together." a voice whispered. "I told you girl, it was more than obvious that they were lying about that whole Joey thing." another echoed from behind Justin. Justin closed his eyes tightly and felt his body pulling away from Britney. He was ashamed. "Hey, it's okay Just." Britney said, hugging Justin loosely. She allowed Justin to pull away, but not without a smile clouding her lips. "Thanks." she uttered, rubbing his shoulder as the song finally ended. Justin nodded again. "Anytime Brit." he responded, turning to his side. "What's up all you lovely ladies and fly gents at Pleasure Island? I'm about to spin one of your favorite joints here at Pleasure Island, and I wanted ya'll to know that the singers of this song are here tonight. That's right, all the ladies get on the floor and all you gents watch out because I'm about to spin 'Say No More' by the gorgeous girls of Innosense who are here tonight." the DJ announced in a loud, prominent voice. Before long, the hard hitting beat began to fill the speakers that surrounded the club. Nikki's eyes lit up as many of the people on the floor remained and some came from all ends of the club to join them. She felt J.C. release her as Veronica and Mandy surrounded them. "It's our song!" Mandy shrieked, jumping as the song began to take full fuel. Veronica and Nikki burst into laughter. "Go 'head girls, show 'em what you got." J.C. contended. He gave Nikki a small shove. Nikki turned her head with a grin. "Watch where you put those hands Josh." she giggled, winking toward him. He laughed roughly. I don't care what you say I don't care what you do Cause I'm never comin' back no more (Never comin' back no more) I don't care what you mean I don't care how you feel So say (say) no (no) Say no more La la oww, la la la la la la La la oww, la la la la la la La la (So what you wanna do?) Veronica searched for Jenny as the chorus finally hit the club. "V, come on, we've got to get our groove on." Mandy demanded, tugging on her friend. Veronica offered a diminutive smirk. "She's right 'Roni." Nikki agreed, sliding past many of the dancing patrons. Veronica spotted Jenny not too far away, in the arms of her boyfriend. She grumbled. "Doesn't she even care that we're being played at the club?" Veronica asked as she stumbled with Mandy to another part of the club. Nikki glanced back to what Veronica stared at. She too was not pleased. 'Trace, what are you doing with her?' Nikki wondered. She followed her friends as the loud beat echoed. Mandy led the group through a small crowd, some of the people recognizing the girls. She swayed her hips seductively to the bass-filled song. She couldn't help but feel herself falling into the routine that was choreographed for the song. "You're really into this Blondie." a southern accent hit her from the side. Mandy turned her head, her glittering green eyes searching for the source of the voice. She quickly spotted Britney being followed by a small crowd of admirers. She giggled softly when seeing the huddle of five that tracked Britney. The end of Mandy's walking caused both Nikki and Veronica to hault a few paces behind her. "Oh, just wait until I tell Ms. Lynn." Mandy chimed in her smooth Southern accent. Britney arched her right eyebrow with curiosity. "Oh yeah, she'll be so happy we got played in the club." Nikki cheered, easing up next to Mandy. Mandy glanced at Nikki and then snickered. She adjusted the collar on her baby blue baby-tee. Her tongue brushed her lips as she let everyone linger in a spoken silence. "No, wait until I tell Ms. Lynn how Brit' was all over Justin tonight. She'll absoluetly just have a fit right there." Mandy jested, her country accent still giving off a twang. Nikki's hand flew over her mouth while Veronica wrinkled her brow. Veronica crossed her arms and slid to the side a little. 'You've got Nick now V, you don't need him.' Veronica tried to convince herself. She still could not handle the reality that she and Britney were both once girlfriends of Justin. She also held a bad taste in her mouth knowing that Justin had broguth Britney to Innosense first, as his girlfriend, and then did the same with her, as his girlfriend. "And it was like a Mickey Mouse Club reunion with J.C. and Nikki doin' the same thang about two steps to the left." Mandy gabbed, turning her eyes on the blushing Nikki. Britney threw her hand over her puckered lips and then pointed quickly towards Nikki. Nikki lowered her eyes and let her hair brush over her face. "It was all in good fun." Nikki proclaimed. Britney nodded briskly. "Just a little fun." Britney agreed with the alibi Nikki presented. Mandy puckered her lips, her eyes showing a rim of skepticism. She took a quick look at Veronica who still kept herself distant from the group. She fired Veronica a fuzzy expression, unsure of Veronica's impetuous silence. She let her eyes stray from Veronica when she heard Britney's voice say, "Ya'll shouldn't worry about that right now anyway. It's your time to shine." Mandy's green eyes brightened with the suggestion. "Oh Britney, don't pretend like you can't enjoy this too. You were apart of us for some time." Nikki jested, perking up as she heard herself hitting high notes over the club's speakers. Mandy hurled her arm around Veronica's shoulders and yanked her closer to the group of girls. "Yep, if 'Manda and Mama D were here right now, it'd be an Innosense reunion, all seven of us." Mandy snickered as the young women drew closer. Britney smiled divinely. "Jenny too." Veronica added softly, glaring at the missing member as she still danced with her boyfriend. Nikki and Mandy nodded, still feeling a bit of indifference. "All of us." Britney gave the final accord as the song slowly faded from the speakers and a new, slower one, chimed in. "Okay people, this is what you've been waiting for. It's time to bump-n-grind on the 'floor with this hot oldie from TLC. I want to see some couples on the 'floor... now!" the DJ expounded as the sounds of a heavy electric guitar flooded the speakers of the club. Nikki quickly looked around as couples broke off into the dancefloor, lovers with lovers, friends with friends, strangers with strangers. She felt, in a way, like an outcast. "Mmm, this is my signal to go find Bryan." Mandy gleamed. Veronica nodded with a small grin. She did not even have to look to know that Jenny and Trace were dancing together. "I think we should all find someone ladies." Veronica advised as she spotted Nick slowly approaching from the middle of the dancefloor. Britney licked her lips seductively, plotting her next step in the club. Nikki crossed her arms, feeling still, out of place. "Where's my baby?" Mandy pondered, gradually pulling away from her group of friends as all of the colored lights in the club died down and only the red ones flickered around. Veronica followed Mandy's steps, moving towards her boyfriend. "I think I'll sit this one out." Nikki stated. Britney batted her eyes. "Really?" Britney asked, stumped. Nikki nodded with an assured expression. Take a good look at it, look at it now Might be the last time you'll have a good round I'll let you touch it if you'd like to go down I'll let you go further If you take the southern route Don't go too fast, don't go too slow You've got to let your body flow I like 'em attentive and I like 'em in control Baby it's yours, all yours If you want it tonight I'll give you the red light special All through the night Baby it's yours, all yours If you want it tonight Just come through my door Take off my clothes And turn on the red light Britney stared at her friend as she felt couples grinding around them. Nikki seemed helpless. 'Poor girl, she probably doesn't know what to do now that she doesn't have Kevin.' Britney thought. She felt two strong arms reach around her and clasp around her waist. "Oh Brit', I've been looking for you. This song fits us well... just like the way I fit in you." Joey said exotically, his husky voice sliding into Britney's ear as he slowly ground into her backside. Britney could smell the tinge of beer on Joey's breath and the sweat that covered his body sliding onto her skin. She was not aroused. "And were you looking for me through the past three songs that you danced with five other women." Britney complained, her body taking a rigid form to prevent Joey from enjoying their dancing. She felt Joey's black beard rub against her face. "Oh come on Brit', they were just there. I was trying to dance and you didn't seem to be in the mood when we first got here." Joey said in a pleading tone. Britney rolled her eyes instinctively. I know that you want me I can see it in your eyes You might as well be honest Cause the body never lies Tell me your secrets and I, I'll tell you mine I'm feelin' quite sexy and I want you for tonight If I move too fast just let me know Cause it means you move too slow I like some excitement And I like a man that goes So baby, come on Britney could feel Joey's large hands beginning to ride slower down her body. It was a mating dance, she knew it. Joey was hungry for something and Britney had to deny him it. She was angry. "And you danced with Justin, so it's sort of fair trade." Joey said, chosing a wrong turn on a shakey highway. Britney furrowed her brow immediately. She looked at Nikki who was slowly being lost in the sea of dancing people. "It was only a dance between friends." Britney assured Joey while hearing his breathing increase. She heard him sigh. "A dance with your ex-boyfriend can be more than that. You'd be mad if I danced with Amanda while we here." Joey argued in a soft way. Britney clenched her hand around Joey's wrist, stopping the direction his hands were headed. "That's different Joey. Amanda's married." Britney presented a weak response. She listened to Joey laugh heavily as they both got lost in a sweaty rush. "Justin's married too," Joey huffed. Britney felt weakened. "He's also gay." Joey whispered, trying not to be heard by others nearby. Britney felt her stomach lurch as Joey spoke. It was slicing hopes she tried to keep alive deep inside of her. If you want me, let me know it I'll make time but you've got to show it (Show it) If you need me, I want to see But don't mistake me I don't want you down on your knees I need someone (Need someone), a real man (A real man) I need someone who understands I'm a woman (I'm a woman), a real woman (A real woman) I know just what I want I know just who I am "Come on, let's go talk... I feel like we're having sex in front of all of these people." Joey advised, pulling away from Britney so that he could stand beside her. Britney exhaled heavily, finally feeling some of the pressure taken off of her. "It's like a massive orgy or something." Joey remarked, watching the way each of the couples danced. Britney, again, pulled up her halter top and flicked her hair back. She cleared her throat and then placed her hands on her hips. "Let's go find Nikki and the others." Britney suggested. Joey agreed silently, taking hold of Britney's small hands and guiding her towards the balcony. Justin skated through a few of the people that still occupied the top portion of the club. 'One beer, two waters, the best way to stay sober.' he told himself as he carried his second glass of water from the bar. He kept a low profile as he moved, hoping not to draw too much attention. 'It also makes you laugh to pee a lot.' Justin giggled to himself, smiling as he strolled. The music was less deafening on the top portion of the club. It was something about the acoustics. Justin cared little. He was only surprised to hear the sudden ring of his cellular phone as he walked through the long stretch that led back to the booth he occupied with his companions. His right hand quickly dug into his pocket while he tried to hold a steady march to the table. 'It's probably mom telling me that Angel's all safe and sound or Brian telling me how he wishes I was at the studio with him.' Justin told his psyche. Justin glanced down to the unfamiliar number on his caller I.D. 'Who?' Justin thought as he stared at the number. He carried the black cellular phone up to his right ear and cradled it between his shoulder and his head. "Hi?" Justin said with an unsure voice. "Justin! Justin, sweetie, it's mom." Lynn Harliss' voice rung heavily with a Southern-bred accentuation. Justin sighed with relief. "Hey mom, what's up?" Justin said with a cool tone. He gripped his glass of water tightly. He listened to a dead silence between the two. "Oh, guess what mom? They played Innosense's song here and everyone was dancing to it. It was a hit!" Justin spoke up before his mother could. Another heavy silence occured. Justin felt a notion telling him that the silence meant something. "Yes, I already called him... I'm talking to Justin right now. I'm trying to get him here... ask the doctor." Justin could hear his mother speaking to someone else besides him. He's interest was automatically sparked when hearing the word 'doctor'. "Mom? Mom, what's going on? Where are you?" Justin askerd briskly, fearful of the way his mother seemed to be plagued by other things outside of him. Justin stopped a few steps from his table, still trying to hear past the background sounds of the club and the sounds from where his mother was. Suddenly, a more-than-apparent thought hit his mind. "Mommy, where's Bastian at? Who has Bastian?" Justin began to ask as expeditious as the concept hit him. "Justin, sweetie, I think you should leave the club and head over to the hospital near our house. Meet me on the pediatrics floor." Lynn declared firmly, trying to hush Justin. Justin felt his grip loosen on the glass of water he held. He watched as Britney, Joey, and Nikki began to crowd the table that was already occupied by Lance, J.C., Chris, and Lonnie. "Why mommy? Is there something wrong with Amaiya? Who's at the hospital?" Justin inquired rashly. He felt a few of his comrades eyes falling on him in his disconcerted state. "No, honey, Angel is here. He's sick honey... he has some kind of flu and he's really sick. We had to admit him to the hospital and I need you to get here now. I called Brian already, just get here." Lynn responded with a stiff voice, one that cried out for quick understanding. The one problem was, as a young father, Justin could not offer that apt understanding. "But..." Justin felt his lower lip tremble as he began to speak. He did not take affliction well. "Justin, Angel will be fine just as soon as he sees his Dad and Daddy. So I need you to get out of the club, get in a car, and get here... right now." Lynn demanded, leaving the conversation with an uncomfrtable silence. Justin listened to the silence and then a dial tone, a signal for Justin to end his night of celebrating. Justin staggered as he pulled the cellular phone from his ear and ended his call. He took those last steps toward the table, his hand shaking. He quickly slammed the glass of water onto the table, trying not to lose his grip on it. Water leaped from it like hard rain splashing off of windows. The sound, the sight was enough to attract all that sat at the table. "Whoa, what's your problem dude? They wouldn't give you any alcohol at the bar?" Chris asked, sliding to one side in the booth to avoid the spilling water. Justin did not answer his sarcastic remark. He turned his eyes on a reliable friend. "J.C., I need the keys to your car." Justin stated flatly. J.c.'s eyes enlargened when he heard Justin's mild request. "For what?" J.C. asked smoothly. "Uh oh, Justin's found himself a hot number." Chris cheered, laughing ignorantly. Lance chuckeled quietly, relcing in the booth and leaning on J.C. "Justin, I just bought this car." J.C. began to speak up. Britney took a look around at the faces of her friends. Justin was the only one without humor emcompassing it. "Yeah Justin. Besides, Josh has to take me home first." Lance snickered in a slightly drunken state. J.C. nudged him when seeing Justin's face turn a sharp red shade. "Just give me the fucking car keys!" Justin barked, causing a silent shudder to fall over the booth. Everyone just stared at Justin, baffled by his sudden hostility. His face was a bright red, his eyes were no longer friendly, and his stance was rigid. Nikki stared at Justin with grand surprise. 'What's wrong with him?' Nikki thought out. "Yo, Justin, calm down for a second." Joey said, standing from the booth. "He doesn't need anymore drinks." Chris made another sneering comment. Justin stared at him with hate. Lance hiccuped, rolling to the side so that he could sit up. "What's going on Justin?" J.C. asked, slowly standing so that he could assist Justin. Justin could not respond to any of the questions being thrown at him. "Justin, what the hell is going on?" Britney pondered while becoming restless with his secrecy. Justin finally gripped his hands into fists and scrunched his face. "My son is in the hospital Britney. And I need to get to him right now, so if no one will fuckin' drive me then I'll fuckin' catch a cab and get the hell away from all of you." Justin hissed, his face slowly losing its red flare. J.C. pushed out of the booth, following Lonnie. "Are you serious?" Joey's lips could not mutter much as his concern heightened. Justin nodded. "Oh my Lord, is he okay? What's wrong?" Britney stopped her own arrogance. She was more than concerned for the health of Angel. "I don't know right now. Look, my mom just called and said he's in the hospital and I have to get there right now." Justin gushed, withholding his truly emotional side. J.C. nudged past Lonnie to get near Justin. He placed an arm around Justin's waist and held him close. "It's okay Justin... come on, we'll get in the car and go see Baby Blue. I'm sure he's okay." J.C. said, holding Justin tightly. Justin placed an arm around J.C.'s shoulders for confidence. "Yeah, let's make sure my God-son is okay." Joey insisted, helping his girlfriend escape the confines of the booth. Britney turned her head back to look at Nikki. "Are you coming Nik'?" Britney asked quickly as she felt Joey tugging her away from the booth. Nikki took a small swallow. "Yeah, sure." Nikki agreed with a hint of uncertainity running through her hollow voice. "Yeah, I'll go with you Josh." Lance spoke up in his bass tone. J.C. gave him little attention. "No, Lance, stay here with the others and tell them what's going on." J.C. responded brashly. Lance's eyes twisted with disbelief. "Chris can do that. It doesn't take two people for that." Lance began to argue with his former lover. J.C. shook his head even before all of Lance's words could take form. "No, stay here Lance. We don't need you to be there too." he insisted with an inflexible tone. Lance felt the argument burning in his stomach, the need to yell at J.C. becoming intolerable. "Just do it Lansten." Joey requested quietly, trying to end the dispute. Lance gripped the sides of his pants and became quiet. He knew arguing would not help the situation. He pulled his eyes away from Justin and J.C. as they walked away. He didn't want to see them, together. "Thanks Lance." he heard a whisper from Nikki as she slowly followed the entourage toward the exit. Lance glanced back at her. He grabbed her arm, holding it loosely. "Nik', just make sure he doesn't get head over heels before he realizing what he's doing." Lance said secretively. Nikki gave him a perculiar look. She was confused by his words. "You'll understand." he added before releasing her arm and walking away. Nikki rubbed her arm softly, still contemplating Lance's words. She saw him disappear into the crowd of people forming at the tip of the dancefloor. "Nikki, come on!" Joey bellowed out, causing Nikki to lose focus on the words and concentrate on what she had to do. Lynn paced slowly around the waiting room on the pediatric floor of the hospital. She had her arms crossed, her head lowered and her body was stiff. 'I can't go to this place one more time.' she told herself, feeling more-than-disturbed with another visit to a hospital. It was becoming the story of her life when it came to her family and her extended family. She had visited too many hospitals across too many states for her to handle another visit. This time, for her, the visit was a new chapter and a more important one. Her eleven-month-old grandson was in the hospital this time and Lynn felt a need to be there for every step and every movement. The sounds of crying children was even more unsettling for her. She had to keep her focus. "Geez J.C., you'd think you'd want all of us thrown into the hospital the way you were driving." Joey complained as he and his associates pranced down the hallway of the pediatric ward. Lynn's head shot up when haering Joey's chalky voice. She searched through the group as they walked towards her. "Look, I was trying to get us here as fast as possible. The important thing is that Justin gets to Angel, whether you have to walk out in a body cast or not." J.C. replied sharply. Britney pulled her hair back into a tight ponytail as her friends argued. Her eyes focused on the walkway ahead of them and she quickly spotted Justin's mother. "Well, it's a good thing I wore my seatbelt." Joey grumbled, sliding his arm around Britney. "Lynn!" Britney called out, pulling away from the brief embrace Joey tried to hold with her and rushing over to the woman that gave birth to Britney's former love. Lynn greeted Britney with a mild smile. She kept her arms folded as the others took a slower approach. "Is Baby Angel okay? What's wrong with him?" Britney spat out quick questions in obvious concern for her God-son. Lynn kept her eyes off of Britney to focus on a more important figure as he advanced. She watched her son slink over to her with a face of complete devastation. She saw the worry in his dark blue eyes. She did not let her heart sink. "I just want to know where he is." Justin spoke softly. He fumbled his hands into his pockets, giving his mother little acknowledgement. Lynn uncrossed her arms. She wasn't speechles, but close enough. "Even though you didn't ask, he has the flu son. And for babies, that's not always the best thing. Luckily, whoever Angel's mother was took very good care of him while he was in the womb, so he's fighting off the virus with the assistance of medication." Lynn spoke with a careless voice. Britney's eyes became wider as she heard the unprofessional diagnosis. Joey closed in on them, placing his hands on the back of Britney's shoulders as he tried to listen. "Does he have a fever?" Nikki asked, pulling in from the side to stand next to Justin. Lynn nodded hesitantly. "A mild one now, but doctors are unsure if it'll go up again. They... they had to give him an IV." Lynn spoke, her voice cracking. Justin could tell she was stressed. He felt her eyes fall on him. "It was so hard watching him as cry as they stuck him. He... he didn't like it at all and all he kept doing was calling for you and Brian." Lynn said with obvious heartbreak. She reached her hand out and placed it on Justin's arm. She did not weep, but she longed to. "He needs to see you." Lynn whimpered. Justin felt himself losing his tight control over his emotions. The looks his mother gave him were grave. It was traumatic for him. "Where is he mom?" Justin repeated his previous question while his voice shook. Lynn swallowed heavily. It was becoming harder and harder for her to stay in the hospital. "He's down this way." she replied, pulling on Justin as she began to walk further down the hall. Justin lft his friends behind as he swiftly followed his mother in the direction of his son's room. He didn't have any concern for them, only for Angel. "We'll be here if you need us J." Joey shouted out as the others began to break off and walk in their own directions. Lynn and Justin ended their walk at a room close to the end of the hall. Just the sounds of the monitoring machines, crying children, and anxious parents from the other rooms was enough to hold Justin in a troubled misery. "Maybe I should look in on him first before you go in?" Lynn suggested, easing towards the door. Justin fleetly grabbed his mother's hand, preventing her from pulling the door open. Lynn flashed Justin a baffled expression. She tried to pull her hand from her son's without thinking. "You said he wanted to see me... so I think I should go in by myself." Justin explained himself shortly. Lynn pulled her hand away, eventually. She gave him a doubtful look. "Not just yet, Justin." rung with a country accent. The sound chimed in Justin's ears, perking them up. Lynn had not spoken and the voice was not female. Justin's head turned in the direction of the voice he had heard so many times before. He felt his face becoming a little more joyful as he realized who was speaking to him. "Hey babe..." Justin was cut off by the look he received from his husband, Brian Littrell. It was not a favorable one. The grimace was enough to cause Justin's tongue to grow numb and hold its position in Justin's mouth. "Paul's looking over Angel right now, so don't worry about checking up on him Lynn." Brian removed his eyes from Justin long enough to utter the information to his mother-in-law. Lynn offered him a nod, but she knew there was a reason for his words. Brian was hinting at something and Lynn was not blind to the signal. 'I can't bail you out this time sweetie.' Lynn thought when realizing the words that would be exchanged between the couple. It was not something she wanted to witness. "Uh, I'll let you two talk." Lynn finally said, drawing away from her son. She rubbed Justin's arm in a comforting way before finally strolling back in the direction of the lounge. Justin crossed his arms with a light expression. He awaited Brian to either greet him with loving words or to berate him with depression. "Why weren't you with him?" Brian began his line of expected questioning. The directness of Brian's voice and question caused Justin to lower his head. He had not felt the shame, just the concern when it came to his actions. He kept his lower lip pouted as he raised his angelic blue eyes. "I told you that we were going to have one final hooray before leaving for the tour. Everyone was stressed out from rehearsals and leaving family and loved ones behind that we all needed a release," Justin replied with an honest tone. He hugged himself a little tighter. "I told you all of this already Brian... before I left." Justin added with a whisper, finally revealing his guilt. He saw no redemption in Brian's glass eyes. He listened as Brian tapped his foot on the floor, signifying his impatience. "You told me that you and the guys were going out for a little bit, that you'd probably be home in an hour because you wanted to make sure Angel got put to sleep and that everything was okay at the house." Brian argued firmly. Justin felt himself ready to disagree, but he again held his tongue. The way Brian's cheekbones flxed did not help Justin feel at ease with the situation. "I didn't see the problem with me being out a little later if no one called me with any problems. Angel seemed to be okay when I left." Justin fussed with a low voice. "'Seemed to be okay?' Justin, if you had the slightest doubt, you should have spoke up. Glassy eyes, a pale face, or even a little cough means that Angel could be coming down with something and you should have taken all the precautions needed." Brian barked at Justin. He had no time to fondle Justin like a child. "I did not want to see our son face the same things that we've had to face, like being in a hospital. Especially when he's only eleven months old and we're not too sure of his medical history." Brian added with a strong convicition. Justin backed away from Brian with a somber expression. He hated arguing with Brian, but he also knew Brian's stubborness and emotional side left him unfavorable for anyone. "Well what about you Brian? You were at the studio before Bastian even woke up this morning. How much time did you dedicate to him? Did you even think to come home for a minute and see us?" Justin said, continuing his battle. He felt an upperhand in the argument that proceeded in the hallway of the hospital. He watched as Brian twitched his nose and ended his nervous habit of tapping his foot. "I was at work, Justin. I was working hard in the studio, I wasn't out partying with Nick and A.J. I was working hard on my music, the group's music instead of enjoying myself and being where I wanted to be." Brian declared, attempting to make Justin feel smaller. The words he spat out were enough to make Justin insecure. "The fact of the matter is that you were out having a good time partying with the same people you will see on the road for the next two months or so while Angel was sick. Angel won't be there for the full or even half the tour... and I might be there even less." Brian added a secure statement that shot right through Justin, exposing his mind to his conscience and leaving him condemned. Justin unfolded his arms and sadly began to sulk. He threw his hands into his pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels as a child would. His facial cast was ghostly. He wanted Brian to reach out and pull off his bandana just to run his fingers through his hair as a sign of comfort. He knew it wouldn't happen, not at that moment. Brian's face still held its angered composure. "I'm... I'm sorry. I should have been with him." Justin whispered, choking up. It aws the only sight Brian needed to see to know he and Justin had another issue to resolve. He shook his head, telling his mind that the opportunity wasn't right. "I'm going to, uhm, run down get some coffee and then I'll see what the nurse says about who can stay over night with Timber. You should be able to visit Angel when Paul comes out." Brian remarked, feeling emotional when looking at his husband's face. His stomach twisted with pain. He watched as Justin nodded for acknowledgement. He sighed with a self-conscious feeling before walking down the hall. Justin scurried backward, his feet stumbling as his back reached out for the wall behind him. His back slammed against the wall with a thud. The rising pain was nothing compared to the pain that throbbed inside of Justin's gut. He closed his eyes tightly and threw his head against the wall. He didn't mind a headache as long as it did not hamper him from seeing Angel. He could feel tears burning against his closed eyes, begging for a release. 'I can't be emotional right now. It's not worth it.' Justin told himself, praying he could control the way he felt. He skid his right foot across the tiled-ground and then kicked it back against the wall. He was frustrated and there seemed to be no cure in sight for him. "Don't hurt yourself Just, please," a voice requested. It wasn't Brian this time and that helped to comfort Justin in his weak moment. He felt a smooth hand run over his cheek and glide its way to his neck and then his broad shoulder. Justin blinked his eyes open with fascination. The massagining hand helped ease his headache. His eyes locked with the smokey blue eyes that were right before him. He could taste the sweet breath that pounded on his lips. "I know you feel guilty, but you couldn't have known he'd be here or that he was even that sick." J.C.'s motuh moved as the words trickled out. Justin sniffled quietly. He was only able to stare at J.C. with curious eyes. He felt J.C.'s other hand manipulate its way up his stomach and across his chest. The warmth of J.C.'s breath near his face made Justin ease closer to him. "Don't worry about how Brian feels right now, just concern yourself with Baby Blue." J.C. added, drawing his fingers over Justin's collarbone. Justin licked his lips and then offered J.C. a small, delicate smile. He nodded slowly, agreeing with his friend. "Do you really think everything'll be okay?" Justin asked as he felt the sudden heat of J.C.'s body close to his. J.C. smiled lovingly. He couldn't help but feel the desire offered in Justin's concerned eyes. "Of course Just. You're a great father and I know once he sees you, he'll be happy," J.C. responded with a built-up confidence. Justin drew his hands from his pockets, lifting them up as to hug J.C. "You always know what to say to make me smile Josh." Justin snickered in a friendly way, placing his hands on J.C.'s back. J.C. giggled under his breath. "You too Justin... you too." J.C. said softly. As if magnetic force pulled on him, J.C. leaned in Justin's direction. He felt his head tilt as he looked deeper in Justin's Cimmerian blue eyes. Justin felt a lump form in his throat as he watched J.C. The breath became warmer and warmer near him. He saw J.C. gradually close his eyes before he could sense J.C.'s lips closed on his own. The thick, pink lips ran over Justin's for a minute, kissing them slowly and then drawing away. Justin was surprised. He did not expect it and he did not ask for it. His body was soon pressed tightly against his friend's as J.C. forced Justin back against the hard wall. Again, J.C. began to kiss Justin. His lips floated over Justin's tender lips without resistance from the other end. The kiss was soft and slowly becoming intimate as J.C. felt a response. He felt Justin sluggishly return the gesture. Temptation was more than danger for the two as J.C. tediously worked his rough tongue into Justin's opening mouth. He ran his hands over Justin's hips, his fingers digging into the fabric of Justin's shirt. He allowed his tongue to run over Justin's, elicitng a moan from his own mouth. He could sense he was more into the kiss than Justin, but he still did not feel any resistance from his younger friend. "Mmm, Justin," J.C. moaned when pulling away from the kiss and then diving back in to taste the sweetness of a mouth that he gerw to enjoy. The kindle of the friendship they once sure was soon being blown out by J.C. For months he had feelings, thoughts, and emotions. December was the realization of his true desire in life, who he truly felt a closeness too, in a friendly way and an intimate way. He realized why he settled for Lance when he was informed that Justin gave his virginity away to Brian. He could see why he objected to the marriage of the two and why he searched for something in Brian's best friend. It was only because he was denied something he did not know he longed for. "Mmmph, Josh, mmph, no," Justin finally objected, pushing J.C. back with strong hands. His fingertips became numb when holding J.C. back. He was scared. The tip of his tongue traced over his lips where he could still taste the lingering flavor of J.C.'s lips. There was no appeal left. He was a married man and he felt betrayed by his friend's invasion. "No..." he exhaled out again while being flooded with even higher emotions. J.C. watched him with timid eyes. He saw the fear and disgust taking over Justin's face. The feelings were not tehre seconds before while he was kissing Justin. The resistance wasn't noticeable as they both savored the tender moment. "I won't tell anyone Just, I promise." J.C. whispered into Justin's ear, sending a haunting echo through Justin's body. The sounds of mild giggling interrupted them as J.C. quickly stepped backward and away from his friend. Justin lowered his head and his eyes. He felt shame running over his face. His lower lip trembled while his eyes still held the encased tears. 'You can't think about this right now Justin.' he told himself, gripping his hands into fists. He placed a hand on the back of his head, kindly scratching it and trying to offer a nonchalant demeanor. "Josh!" the sound of Nick Carter's nasally voice stole the attention away from J.C. and Justin's musings. Justin sniffled quietly, raising his head to glance at the approaching party. It was Nick and Brian that walked with light feet and high-pitched laughs. 'Oh Lord, why him and why now?' Justin thought as the irony soon unfolded for him. J.C. glanced at Justin before finally giving his fiancé the attention that was deserved. Nick ended his walking right in front of J.C., preventing him from getting a full glimpse of Justin. He pushed aside guilty feelings to share a small hug with Nick. "Is he okay?" Nick asked softly, referring to Justin in a mild way. J.C. directed his attention on the man Nick referred to. He peered at Justin over Nick's shoulder. He watched Justin with careful eyes. He desired to protect him, no matter the cost. "I think he'll be fine. He's just a little out of place right now." J.C. replied in a hushed manner, trying to keep his voice low enough that his friends did not hear him. He brushed his hand through Nick's thick blonde hair, wrestling with his emotions as Nick cluthced onto his arm. He let his shoulder meet Nick's ehad as Nick rested it there. He was tired. "Did you have fun tonight hon'?" Nick asked in a petite way, rubbing J.C.'s arm. J.C. wrapped an arm around Nick's waist, holding him loosely as he watched Brian approach Justin. He felt his upper lip begging to curl with despise. His eyes peered at Brian before he realized that he had ignored Nick's question. "Yeah, some interesting things occured tonight." J.C. responded, a chippery smile pulling on his lips. He licked his lips slowly, tasting Justin's sugary lips on the edge of his lips. The hot feel of Nick's lips on his cheek soothed J.C. "You'll have to tell me about it some time." Nick yawned out, snuggling his head closer to J.C.'s neck. J.C. nodded without much hesitance. 'Some time.' J.C. said to himself, keeping a stare with Justin. "We should leave so they can talk." Nick's whisper again stole J.C.'s concentration. J.C. stayed strong in his position. The idea was not appealing to him. He allowed Nick to tug on his arm to force him to walk. Nick yanked his head up with suspicion. "Come on." he repeated. He observed the glare in J.C.'s glowing blue eyes as he admired Justin. Nick arched his eyebrow. 'No,' he thought immediately, washing away any jealousy that might form. He tugged on J.C. once more. "Let's go sweetie." he requested a little louder, causing some attention to fall ont he couple. J.C. felt the pressure finally burst, forcing him to walk with Nick down the hallway and away from Brian and Justin. Justin remained quiet in the hallway as he inspected Brian while he rotated a Styrofoam cup of coffee in his right hand. The strong scent sent a warming sensation through Justin. He reminisced on the days he would sit at the table with Brian as Brian sipped on his coffee and made small conversations with him. He could remember the times that Brian would drink his coffee as Justin fed Angel his breakfast and, often enough, held Brian as Brian fed Angel. He could still smell the mixture of Brian's cologne in the morning and his coffee. He observed the steam rise from the cup. 'Still warm.' Justin sighed to himself. Brian flexed his cheek bones, pulling attention to his chiseled face. He did not know how to speak to Justin anymore. He no longer held the scowl on his face, but a halfhearted look. Comforting, it was not, but it still releived Justin some. "The nurse told me that one of us can stay with Timber, but not both. The hospital won't allow it. So I, uh, I told them that I'd probably stay and take care of him through the night." Brian delivered. The information was just another let down for Justin. He shoveled his foot into the ground, thoroughly disappointed with his husband's words. He took in his lower lip, a nervous habit that Brian observed. "Brian, please let me stay with him. You can go home, relax... let me stay." Justin began to plead, tilting his head to the side. Brian looked at him, his lips puckering. He cleared his throat softly. He started to shyly shake his head. "Justin, right now, I think you're the one that needs the rest. Maybe some time to realize how serious the situation can be. The nurses know that since I've been here for awhile, that... well they think that I'm the better father to be with Angel right now, to comfort him. They'd prefer that." Brian said the words that he did not want to. Something inside of him did not hold him back and before it truly sunk in, Brian already regretting speaking the words. Brian's eyes directed their attention on Justin's face as an immediate reaction was brought about. The steady frown running over Justin's face discouraged Brian. Justin sniffled a little louder, his clear tears still latching onto his eyelids. Justin released his lower lip, trying not to sob. He rubbed the edge of his nose with his thumb while his other hand twisted in the bottom of his shirt. "Brian..." Justin coughed out. "Plus your mom already recommended that I stay with Angel. She thought it'd be best." Brian began to argue, turning his eyes from Justin's desperate face. Justin stepped further near Brian. "Bri..." Justin continued to reach out for him. Brian kept his eyes away as his conscience yelled at his psyche. "I didn't plan on going to the studio until like noon tomorrow anyway, so I could handle it just fine." Brian spoke again. "Rocky..." Justin finally pleaded with a shaking voice and the name that could yank Brian's eyes away from anyone. Brian automatically let go of his emotions to look upon Justin. A small, clear tear finally escaped Justin's eyes. It slide carelessly down Justin's fuzzy, pale cheek. It met with Justin's lips, trickling over them and then glazing down his chin before finally falling off his face. The lump in Brian's throat was unbearable. He felt his own eyes being sealed with tears as he stared at Justin. "Let me stay with me, please..." Justin released a final plea, his hand meeting Brian's shoulder. Brian ran his eyes over Justin's arm and to his hand as it rested on his shoulder. He couldn't fight it. His emotions had reached their peak and now he needed to either hide them or face breaking down. He only nodded for a response. The lump had lodged itself in Brian's throat, holding in words from travelling upward and out of his mouth. "S-S-Stay." he stuttered, drawing back from Justin. He attempted to clear his throat, hoping the lump would go away instead of swelling. He watched a small, still lost, smile cross over Justin's red lips. Brian forced himself to smirk back at Justin. "Stay." he repeated once more for affirmation. Brian stumbled forward, closer to Justin. "I'll be staying at your mom's house tonight because it's closer to the hospital. So if you need to call because Timber's getting sicker, please do." Brian whispered. He lifted a hand, pressing his thumb onto Justin's lips to rid them of the traces of the tear. Justin coughed softly, giving him a miniature nod. Justin sniffled hard. "This is your chance for redemption Justin, don't screw it up. Right now, a lot of us are wonderin' if ya taking fatherhood as serious as you need to, especially me. There's a time to play with your pals and then there's a time to play with your son. The latter comes first." Brian spoke with seriousness wrapped in his country accent. Justin closed his eyes, the stinging of welled-up tears still irritating him. He lifted his lids to reveal the red-stained eyes. Again, he sniffled. "Timber needs ya right now, so be there for him. Don't let him down Just. You know if you weren't ready for this, you shouldn't have said to me, 'I do.'" Brian added. He leaned in a placed a small peck on the tip of Justin's nose. It was his sign on affection. He tapped the tip of Justin's nose with his index finger, smiling timidly. He pulled back briskly to leave Justin with his thoughts as he said his farewell to his son. Just as tears fell in their own rapid fashioned, time slipped by through the night for Justin. He had had his first cry less than an hour before and now he only felt miserable. A white bandana still cloaked his head while he sported a tight, black T-shirt and baggy black jogging pants. His focus was to stay comfortable while being in the hospital room with his son. His heavy eyes glanced down to his watch as he crossed the side of Angel's bed. He hated the sounds of the beeps and hums that came from the machinery near Angel's bed. 'Almost four.' Justin grumbled to himself as his face faded to another shallow shade. His tears stained cheeks hung low due to Justin's lack of smiling. He scoffed his feet across the floor as he came closer to Angel's bed. He stayed on the side of the bed to be closer to his son. His hand reached out and touched Justin's back through the linen that covered him. Justin massaged his back as Angel slept on his stomach. Angel's blonde hair was mopped around, his cheeks were a light shade of red, his lips seemed a deep reddish hue, and his breathing was deep. Justin peeked a smile. When viewing the shaggy hair that laid on Angel's head, he could only think of his own hair as a child. Angel was not restless in his slumber due to the medications that doctors had given Angel, earlier, against his will. The IV continued to send medictation through his body, trying to stifle the fever that seemed to plague Angel's small body. Justin drug his hand up from Angel's back and placed it on the small child's head. He ruffled the blonde hair for seconds while hoping not to wake his son. He barely licked his lips before tasting a saltiness in his mouth. A tear had again escaped Justin's eye as he played with Angel's hair. 'Predictable.' Justin thought as he unconsciously let another tear slide out from his eyes. He sighed with a lingering depression coating his body. "I'm so sorry Bastian. I should have been at home with you. Please forgive Daddy," Justin began to cry with a strong voice, his warm tears running down his pale cheeks. He proceeded to massage Angel's head. "I didn't mean to be out so late, I really didn't son. I know I said I'd be right back and I should have been... I should have been. I'm sorry Bastian, really." he continued to speak with small sobs in between breaths. His guilt had finally consumed him, leaving Justin with no exit. He pressed his eyes close so that lingering tears could fall and grace his face. His fingers ran down Angel's brow, oevr his small nose, across his closed lips and then to his round chin. "I'm here for you now son." Justin choked out, sniffling as the depression continued. Another thought crossed Justin's mind. A kiss still traced its way through his emotions, causing him to consider options, thoughts, and feelings he had yet to explore. He brought his hand up and lightly ran his fingers across his lips. He felt disgrace shiver through his fingertips. Another tear trickled, followed by another, and another. Justin glared down at Angel. He felt weakened when thinking of memories that had meant the world to him. He brought his hand back down to Angel's back, cupping Angel. "And I'll never leave Dad. Never Bastian... I love him." he added a whisper that meant more to him than his son. Reassurance was the best escape for Justin. Justin had but one fear in his life. His fear was to be what his parents were to him, a facade of happiness. He couldn't imagine seeing his child grow up in a house like he did, where the parents argued constantly and there wasn't much support for him. He did not want to what his father had become in his life. He wanted to be there for Angel, always, no matter what choices he made in life. All Justin wanted to be, desired to be, was a good father. At this minute, Justin did not feel that way. A tune probed its way through Justin's head. He could remember listening to it earlier, at his mother's house, with his mother, Nikki, Danay, Angel, and J.C. The song related too purely to Justin's situation. The way the melody walked in time with the music, the notes, helped to compose Justin's life in so many words. It aws the way the drums pounded like the tears from Justin's eyes. The way the orchestra and synthesizers ran hand-in-hand like Justin's heart did. It told the story of Justin's life, what he wanted to be for Angel and for Brian. He placed one of his fingers in Angel's hand, feeling a small tug on it from his son. He let a smile tug at the corners out his mouth. He hummed the tune as he tried to remember every lyric that was sung by his friends, the ones he considered sisters, Innosense. If you should call my name I will always hear you There wherever you are If you reach out your hand Mine will always find you I will be there There, no matter how far Nothing can stop my love If you need me around Around Nothing can hold me back Or hold me, hold me down No, no no, no no no A hundred oceans Couldn't keep me from you Couldn't keep me baby, never keep me from you A thousand mountains They would just be no use Never stop me baby, oh no I'd still be there for you (for you) I'd still get to you somehow, someway Nothing can stop me Not even a hundred oceans If you should miss my touch And the night's too lonely I will come to your side Anywhere you go You can always find me I will be there There's no river too wide Nothing can stop my love No fire, no wind, no rain No rain Nothing can slow me down Or block my, block my way No Justin could still Nikki's voice pounding through his cranium. She described the way Justin felt in the perfect way. He pressed down on the bed as he found a seat next to it. He had previously pulled a chair up close to bed Justin leaned on the edge of the chair, trying to remain as close to Angel as possible. Tears seemed to be his only release as they cascaded down his fair cheeks. Justin leaned up from his seat, crouching near the bed. Hetickled Angel's nose with his finger before laying a gentle kiss on his cheek. "Not even a hundred oceans Bastian." he whispered before pulling away from the bed and taking a seat again in the chair. Morning rose like an eagle taking flight, wings spread and head high. The birds chirped from outside of the hospital, calling for its occupants to awaken. Brian did not assist the birds in their morning activity. He appreciated the peacefullness that came with slumber. He eyed the inhabitants of room 311. They were peaceful in every sense. He admired his son as he continued to sleep through his sickness, his face finally receiving its normal hue and his expression was mild. The head layign next to his curled up body belonged to Justin. His bandana still sat ruggedly on his head while his arms were enfloded to support his head and his body was tensed up in the chair he had slept in through the night. Brian crossed over the threshold of the room and trodded towards the bed. The chill of the room was still strong, but not uncommon to Brian. He had seen too many hospital rooms not to know that cold air came with the territory. Brian traced his fingers up the sheets that encased Angel's bed before his fingertips met with the fuzzy comforter the hospital provided for Angel. Brian smiled mildly. The way Angel slept so peacefully was remarkable to him. He laid a stuffed Winnie the Pooh next to his son knowing it was one of Angel's favorite toys. Brian rubbed Angel's cheek before caressing his head. His hand tested Angel's tempature and could feel no signs of the fever that beleaguered Angel the night before. Brian began to chew the inside of his mouth as his hand trailed down his son's head towards his husband's head. He sucked in his cheeks as he found Justin's head. He gripped the white bandana that was fixed on Justin's head. He pulled it backward, taking it off with a smooth swoop. When removed, the banada revealed Justin's curly, short-cut, strawberry blonde hair. Near the roots, Brian could still see signs of Justin's brown tresses. He laced his free hand's fingers into Justin's curls, feeling their gentle, matted-down texture. His missed that head laying on his chest. He wished that both Angel and Justin were at home last night, but wishes can not stop fate from occuring. Brian merely dealt with loneliness by waking up early and making an instant trip to the hospital to see both the males he missed in his life. Brian listened as he heard Justin moan softly. He giggled speechlessly. He concentrated on Justin as he stretched wildly and yawned even louder. "Hey, quiet down." Brian spoke up, patting Justin's shoulder to silence him. Justin's eyes quickly batted open, flicking the sleep away to stare upward. His half-open eyes looked up at Brian. Justin was breathless. The way Brian smiled at him sent him into another world. "You're gonna wake Bastian if you keep up all that yawning." Brian commented with a lighthearted look in his eyes. The way his dimples flexed made Justin's heart warm up again. 'Did he just say Bastian?' Justin tried to register the thoughts in his head. He stretched quietly, sitting up in the chair he had slept in. Brian took in his lower lip, chewing on it. He waited for Justin to say one word, something to him. He looked at the bags, the wrinkles under Justin's eyes. He hadn't slept much and he had been crying, obvious signs to Brian. Brian knelt down next to Justin, causing Justin to look him in the eyes. Brian took Justin's face into his hands, cupping it and massaging it. "You don't hate me, do you?" Brian asked with a whisper. He ran his thumb under Justin's bottom lip. He felt feel the small hairs trying to grown in around Justin's chin. The silky skin was just the right remedy to cure Brian's loneliness. "No, of course not." Justin replied with a strained voice. He coughed under his breath. Brian smiled amicably. He leaned in and kissed the end of Justin's nose, pressing their foreheads together. "Do you hate me?" Justin finally asked a question he had on his lips. Brian shook his head, rubbing his forehead against Justin's. "Not at all babe." Brian added a vocal response. He ran a finger over Justin's earlobe. "I was just mad because I wasn't there for him either. We both weren't there for him and I... I didn't want everyone to think we were bad fathers, because we're not Justin. We're just new to this." Brian further explained himself. Justin sniffled. He felt comfortable with himself again hearing Brian's thoughts. He felt Brian's lips press against his for a small kiss. The taste of Brian's syrupy lips wiped away any remaining flavor that was brought about by J.C.'s kiss. Brian licked the outside of Justin's lips while pulling away. Justin licked his own lips as Brian drew closer to him. "So you don't think I'm a bad father?" Justin questioned another inquiry in his mind. "You couldn't be Justin. You're there for Timber every step of the way." Brian assured him, running one hand to the back of Justin's head. He brushed Justin's hair down. His hand beckoned on Justin, pulling his head forward so that they could kiss once more. "Dada? Dada?" Angel's voice broke their kiss as his head peeked up. Brian and Justin both turned to Angel with smiles on their lips. Angel blinked his eyes rapidly as he adjusted to the place he was in. "Dada." he said again when taking sight of Justin. Justin's perky blue eyes brightened. He pulled away from Brian's embrace so that he could reach for Angel. "Hello Bastian." he cheered, lifting his son from the bed. Justin carefully pulled Angel up into his arms and turned to face Brian. Justin chose not to stray too far from the bed knowing that Angel was still hooked up to several of the machines. Justin leaned on the edge of Angel's bed as Angel cuddled to his father. "Dada, uh," Angel grunted groggily. Justin was aware of what Angel wanted. Brian laughed wildly, taking a seat in the chair Justin had occupied. "Same old Timber." Brian remarked while handing Justin a pacifier he had brought from their house. Justin grinned, snatching up the pacifier. "He's just cranky, that's all." Justin commented, slipping the pacifier in between Angel's open lips. Brian gave him a smiling pout. "Sorta like his Daddy?" Brian said sarcastically. Justin rolled his eyes with an irresistable laughter. "Well, it seems that Angel Littrell has finally woken up from his long slumber." the sound of a nurse entered the room as a slender, young female pranced into the room. Justin glanced up with prepared eyes. He watched her snatch up Angel's chart from near the bed and walk over to the machines that were still hooked up to his son. Brian glanced over to the nurse as she began to write down resulsts from Angel's monitors. She kept a steady eye as she printed his vitals onto his chart. "Looks good, very good." she said as she glanced up from the monitor. She smiled brightly toward Angel. Justin rubbed Angel's head with an equal smirk. "So he might get to come home today?" Brian asked quickly with hope in his expression. The nurse glanced over Angel's chart briefly, searching for any other signs or problems. "It's quite probable, but I don't want to really say until the doctor has a look at him." she responded, grabbing a thermometer and carrying it over to where Justin and Angel sat. J.C. Chasez stood but a few paces outside of the room, staring inside through the doorway. He sighed heavily while watching Justin cradle Angel. 'Man, what am I thinking?' J.C. questioned himself as he became aware of his emotions. He drug his foot across the ground feeling unhappy. He couldn't comprehend how he was finally being attacked by what he tried to hide from himself, his feelings. He could o\hear his ex-girlfriend singing into his ear the words that reflected his thoughts. 'I can't say no more.' he said to himself, hugging himself as he leaned against the wall he had pressed Justin up against the night before to share their first kiss. "Thinking hard, aren't ya?" Lynn Harliss' voice broke the silence J.C. held in the hallway. J.C. quickly turned his head in her direction with a somber look. He tried to vibrant his look, but it was unfixable. He had a fixed expression and one that would not go away. He shoveled his hands into his back pockets on his jeans. Lynn gave him a curious glance. "So come on, tell me what's on your mind Josh." Lynn demanded with a halfhearted grin. J.C. shrugged following her words. He could not admit to Justin's mother that he had feelings for Justin. Lynn sighed unappreciatevly. She strolled in front of J.C., preventing him from looking back into Angel's room. "Josh, come on now, you lived with me for like two years. There's nothing you can't tell me. I mean if Justin can tell me that he's in love with a man and I'm still alive, what you have to tell me couldn't do much damage." Lynn jested, crossing her arms. J.C. propelled his bottom lip out, pressing harder against the wall. He looked down at the floor as most shy people would. He was unsure what to do. "I... I don't think I'm ready for marriage, at least not to Nick." J.C. managed to get out with failing notes. The shock Lynn quicker than she expected. She found it harder and harder to believe as she reviewed the words in her head. "You don't want to marry him?" Lynn questioned briefly. J.C. nodded bashfully. "I mean I love Nick, I really do. He has a strong hold on my heart, but I don't think it's as strong as it was when we first got together. It's changed. I'm seeing new sides of him, and myself." J.C. explained himself shortly. He lifted his icy blue eyes to observe Lynn's expressions. She was definetely bewildered by J.C.'s words, but not without her own thoughts. "And you're finding yourself falling for someone else? Or you just can't see yourself going that far with Nick, right now at least?" Lynn continued to inquire. Again, J.C. nodded. He was amazed at Lynn's insight when it came to relationships. Lynn inched nearer to J.C., studying his face. She saw regret and shame in his eyes, his lips, his cheeks, his entire face. "I'm going to be honest Josh, if you don't feel ready, don't do it. Don't marry Nick. From experience, you don't want to get too far along and then realize that you truly don't love someone. You don't want to be married with children and realize that you just can't commit to someone. So you need to tell Nick that you're not ready for marriage before you get into something that'll not only ruin your life, but everyone around you." Lynn said with a commanding appearance. She was sincere, but she was not sure on how to show that to him. J.C. took a deep exhale. He had to calculate all that Lynn had said to him. He eased off the wall with a clearer look on his face. "I want what Brian has." J.C. ermarked, watching as Brian cuddled to his husband and son. Lynn took a quick look over her shoulder to see the family. She smiled happily. She brought her head back to J.C. "Whoever you think you can get that with, find that person and make it happen." Lynn declared, walking away from J.C. to enter the room with her son-in-law, son, and grandson. J.C. nodded as she left. 'I'm going to get it.' J.C. told himself with a glare of determination running through his silvery eyes. TO BE CONTINUED... *** Tick , tock, tick, tock.... the clock is ticking ya'll. So e-mail me! HAH! Well, tell me what yuo thought of this one. I know a LOT of ya'll are saying, 'Well who does JC really want? Nick? Lance? Nikki? Justin?' Well he's going to end up with one of them in the end people (Yes that's includes Nikki!). And as we speak, I'm probably writing the next chapter to this tale. It may be my last chapter just because I'm heding off to *cough* college *cough*. But we'll see, huh? Oh yeah, uh oh, Boy Band Awards are supposed to be coming up. Trust me, I don't care if I'm nominated this time around. I've been too out of it to make it. I'm sorta like Backstreet Boys at the VMA's this year, not even looking for a nomination. I'm just glad to still have readers. I must say that I WANT all of you to go listen to some music by Innosense because, for one, you're going to be seeing a lot of the lyrics in the stories because they relate to the storylines and, two, the songs are great for any mood! Especially the song 'One Hundred Oceans'. So if you have to go through Napster or whatever, please at least listen to one of the songs by these girls! They are taleneted and their music is so well done. They are truly the female *NSYNC, so ya'll should like them. Trust me. Anyway, that's all for now, so have a good night and listen to some Innosense! Peace... ***