Date: Tue, 16 Nov 1999 17:34:34 -0500 From: Rachel Subject: Choices 5-6 Okay here they are...for all the people who have been holding their breath, the next two chapters of Choices. These were actually finished about a week and a half ago, but I wanted to send them in the same time I sent in Escape, which is also new. So go read that too!! E-mail me if you want to. I like to hear from people and sometimes I can even get the time to write back! Disclaimer: blah blah blah...you know the dealie Chapter 5 JC closed his eyes and let his body relax. With a sigh, he curled up into a ball, hoping to get a least a short nap in. They had been rehearsing for six hours now. Fatima was doing an hour on, hour off schedule with the two bands. She had an assistant working with Britney and her dancers. JC was very glad it was 'Nsync's hour off. His muscles were aching and his head was spinning. "Josh." JC opened one eye to see who was interrupting his rest time. "Hey Josh. Are you awake?" Howie was leaning over him, holding Luna in his arms. "What Howie?" "Can you please keep an eye on Luna? Chris has his hands full." Howie pleaded with JC, who just sat up and sighed. He held his arms out for Luna. "Thank you so much Josh." Howie handed him the squirming baby. Luna immediately smiled up to JC and grabbed his finger. "Howard! Get onstage now or else you are running laps during your next break!" Fatima hollered at him from the other end of the auditorium. Howie jumped up and ran to his place. "So are you at all sleepy today Luna? 'Cause I could sure use a nap right about now. Want to join me?" Luna stared up at him as he talked to her. In the past two months, Luna had caught up to babies her age. She was right on schedule with her mental development. She was still tiny though. She hadn't caught up with size yet. He tickled her stomach, making her giggle. JC smiled. He loved kids so much. JC grabbed his jacket and stuck it under his head. He laid on his side with Luna next to him. She kept moving around, gurgling and just making noises in general. "I guess you aren't in the mood for a nap are you. Okay then, let's play a little." JC grabbed the diaper bag Howie had left with him and began to root through it for toys. His hand closed upon something and he grinned. "Okay Miss Luna. Do you like to play with this?" JC pulled out a puppet and began to play with her with it. He was slightly astonished by her acuity when it came to grabbing the puppet when it came near her. Justin plopped down next to the laughing JC. He took a drink from a bottle of water. "Hey Josh. Hey Luna." Justin leaned over and gave Luna a raspberry on her stomach, making her squirm and giggle. "Hey Curly. How come you aren't napping?" "I could ask you the same thing. I'm not really tired. How come you have Luna? I thought Howie and Chris just exchanged duties when the other is onstage?" "Howie said Chris had his hands full, so he asked me. Luna's no trouble at all except she doesn't seem to need to nap right now, unlike me." Justin looked down, slightly confused. Luna's eyes were closing as they were speaking. "Looks like she is sleepy to me." JC looked down and smiled. He cradled her in his arms and rocked her slowly. "Well I guess I lied. She wasn't tired a few minutes ago." "How are you feeling Josh?" "Sore." JC knew that Justin wasn't asking about that. "Side-stepping Josh. You know what I mean." "A little better. I'm not as lonely as I was since we are so busy again. It's helping me stay focused on something other then how I am feeling right now." "Do you think that's a good thing to do Josh? Maybe you should focus on how you are feeling." "I like how I am feeling right now okay. Things are honestly better." "How are the sessions with Joey going?" "Not bad. Joey's really easy to talk to and I feel comfortable with him." "That's great Josh. How was Christmas this year?" JC winced, but put on a smile to hide the pain from Justin. "Not bad, but then of course, Christmas hasn't been the same the past few years." Justin squeezed JC's hand, preventing him from falling back into the past. "How was your Christmas Justin?" "Fan-freakin-tastic! I went to my Dad's this year and I got to spend time with Jonathon, Steven, and Kristin. They are all so cute. We had so much fun this year." JC looked at the happy boy. Very little made Justin as happy as seeing his brother and sister. "Joey grab her for me!" Chris shouted from across the way. Joey dropped his phone and grabbed the baby who was quickly crawling past him. "Gotcha! Who do I have Chris?" "Kira. She got away while I was changing Haley's diaper." Chris walked over to Joey, holding Haley in one arm. She was smiling happily. "These two are going to be holy terrors once they start to walk Chris. I pity you." "Don't say walk. Kira's already trying it. Danielle and I are not ready for that." "Oh jeez!" Joey juggled Kira around, bending over to pick his phone back up. "Uncle Pete. I'm so sorry about that. Yes I know. I know. Sorry. Of course I...Uncle Pete. Sorry." Joey handed Chris Kira and went back to his conversation. "Join us Chris. I'll keep an eye on one of those little monsters for you." Chris shifted Kira so she was under his arm and went to grab the diaper bag. Both JC and Justin marveled at how he was able to carry the two squirming girls and the diaper bag. "How do you do that Chris?" "Do what?" He asked as he sat down next to JC. "Juggle two kids and a diaper bag." Chris chuckled as he handed Haley over to Justin, who began to play with her immediately. "That's nothing. I've done the kids, Busta, a diaper bag, and groceries in one trip." From out of nowhere there was a shriek followed by barking. Chris sighed. "Speaking of him, BUSTA!!!" They could hear claws skittering across the stage as he darted in between Fatima's legs. Busta slid into place next to Chris with a satisfied grin on his face. "What mischief did you just get into old man?" Chris asked grinning back at him. Busta just wagged his tail happily. Chris just shrugged, figuring he would find out eventually. The shriek sounded awfully familiar. "Christopher Kirkpatrick!! Look what your damn dog did to my shoes!" Britney stood over them angrily, holding out a pair of well- chewed Nikes. "Busta, how many times do I have to tell you Adidas' are much more expensive then Nike's. I only want you chewing up Britney's really good shoes." Chris grinned evilly at her as Justin and JC began to laugh. "Also Britney, could you please watch your language around my children? I don't want them to pick up bad words from you." Britney fumed as she stomped away. The tour hadn't even begun and she was already getting tortured by the 'Nsync guys. She wasn't going to take much more of this. Those assholes better watch themselves. "So JC, I hear you had a hot date the other day." Chris grinned at him. JC began to blush heavily. Justin smiled even bigger then before. He hadn't known about this. "Shut up Chris." "No way. We want details. Tell us about him or her." JC blushed even more, his still-blond hair emphasizing how red he was turning. "Hey it's funnier to make him blush with the blond hair then with his real hair color. Look how red he turns." "Shut up Chris." "Tell us JC, please." "Her name is Natalie. And that is all I am saying." Luna began to squirm in JC's arms. Her face scrunched up and she began to wail. Saved by the cry. "That's a hungry cry JC. Left side, 3rd pocket." Howie shouted from the stage, not missing a beat for the dance they were working on. JC grabbed the bottle and shook it up. Luna continued to wail as JC tried to give her the bottle. She refused the bottle pushing JC away with her tiny fists. "Here, give her to me." Chris put Kira down and grabbed Luna. He tickled her under the chin, causing her to gasp and open her mouth up. He quickly slipped the bottle in and she began to eat hungrily. Chris handed her back to JC and picked Kira back up. "So Justin what are you doing tonight?" "Nick and I are going to a club with Allie and her friend Casey. She wants to go dancing, so he is dragging me along to keep Casey company." Chris grinned at him. "So essentially you are going on a date with Casey." "Chris shut up before Britany hears." Justin looked around nervously. He didn't want to supply her with any extra ammunition. "Calm yourself Justin. She's long gone. Besides Busta would have let us know if she was around." Lance sighed heavily as he was put on hold again. He was so tired of this. Looking over the information in front of him for the 50th time, he finally hung up. "Jean-Michel?" "Yes, James?" Jean-Michel looked up from the laptop he was working on. One of his many duties was to take care of the website and e-mail. "I need you to take care of this. I have to go back outside. I should really try to spend some time with the group." He handed Jean the sheaf of papers. Jean-Michel quickly scanned them and put them aside. "I will get right on them as soon as I am done this chunk of HTML." He turned back to the laptop. Lance gave him a kiss on the cheek and walked out. Lance had been so busy with group stuff, he hadn't really spent anytime with the other guys besides rehearsals. Whenever they had breaks he had to go take care of stuff for 'Nsync as well as some of the other groups he managed. This happened before every tour though. He had to get everything under control before he headed out on the road. It always took a lot of time for him to get connected with the other four again. Lance had been away from the inner workings of the group for so long it always took some time to get back into the swing of it. "Uncle Pete, I told you already. The Jets are going to crash and burn. They are going to be trashed during the playoffs." Joey was talking loudly to his uncle as Lance passed by him. They all gave Joey a wide berth when he was on the phone with his Uncle Pete. They were basically the same person, so they always ended up getting into arguments about sports because the other person was always wrong. Joey waved to Lance as he walked by, but continued to yell about how shitty the Jets were this season. Lance waved back and headed towards the other three guys. It was so weird for Lance to see all of them taking care of children. A lot had changed since the last tour. Busta began to bark, interrupting Lance's thoughts. He ran over to Lance, happily barking at him. Lance picked him up and scratched behind his ears. "Hey Busta. How are you old man?" Lance drawled. His accent always came on strong when he was talking to animals or children. Busta barked at Lance in response. Lance carried him back over to the rest of the guys and sat down with them. "I thought you had calls to make Scoop?" "I got fed up with being put on hold. I gave it to Jean-Michel to take care of." Busta jumped off Lance's lap and trotted over to JC. He sniffed at the infant in his lap, curious about her. "Busta get back here. Play with Kira not Luna." Chris quickly got Busta away from her. He eagerly went over to Kira and began to lick her. She giggled and began to play back. "Is Jean-Michel qualified to handle it James?" Lance bristled slightly at JC's question. "I wouldn't have let him handle it if he wasn't Josh." They glared at each other, causing Chris and Justin to exchange worried glances. Justin coughed loudly getting their attention. "So who wants to sit next to me on the plane? I promise to supply hours of entertainment." Justin grinned at them, causing Lance and JC to break their glaring contest. "Anybody bringing family?" "Just Nick. I think Allie and Casey are going at least for the first couple weeks. They both have to go back to school at some point." "Well I already claimed Joey for the plane ride." JC looked at Justin, who nodded understandingly. "Come on Chris. You and me. It'll be a blast." Chris grimaced jokingly. "You always fall asleep 5 minutes after the plane takes off Curly. I want to sit with someone who will stay awake." "I am older Chris. I can stay awake on a plane now." Chris shrugged. "It's not really worth an argument since I'm sitting with Howie anyway." Justin pouted. That only left one person without a seat partner. "I guess that leaves me with Brian." Justin liked Brian, he really did. But Brian hated flying. He was scared to death of it. Whoever sat with him practically got a broken hand from Brian death-gripping it during takeoff and landing. "I'm sure Britney isn't sitting with anyone Justin." Lance grinned at him. No one else smiled. Justin put Haley on the ground and got up. "I guess I can't expect you to understand James. If you had even one ounce of understanding you would have told me she was touring with us still and you would never be joking about it." With that, Justin walked away. No one said anything. They could hear the music the Backstreet Boys were dancing to and they could hear Joey talking to his uncle. Lance wanted to disappear. JC took the bottle out of Luna's mouth and burped her. Haley crawled over to Kira and curled up next to her and Busta, who were already napping. "I think you need to talk to Justin Lance. The rest of us know how he is feeling. Maybe you should find out." Joey sat down next to Chris. "Where did Curly go?" JC and Chris looked at Lance. He hung his head, but answered Joey. "I made a joke about him and Britney. He got upset and left." Joey sighed. He stood back up. Time to go back to work. "Which way did he go?" Chris pointed in the direction Justin had gone and nodded to Joey. Joey nodded back, as they carried on a silent conversation with their eyes. "I'm going to go talk to him for a few minutes Lance. Then you need to go talk to him about this. This tour is going to be hard enough for him without one of his best friends making jokes because he isn't aware of how he is feeling." Lance nodded and watched as Joey left the room. Both Chris and JC began to talk about something else, leaving Lance out. With a sigh he stood up and wandered around the room. Joey headed towards the little indoor gym. Knowing Justin, he was playing basketball. He could hear the ball bouncing against the wooden floor. Joey opened the door and walked inside. The ball bounced past him and he grabbed it. Justin stopped to look at him. "Can I have the ball please?" Joey tossed it to him. "Take it easy. We have another hour of rehearsals yet." Justin nodded and took another shot. "Want to chat about what Lance said?" Joey gently pushed him towards talking. Justin caught the ball and held it. He nodded. Justin had discovered a long time ago that talking to Joey always helped him. "Let's play while we are talking." He tossed the ball to Joey who took a shot. "Why is it Lance can't understand that this hurts? I loved Britney. I really did. I still love Britney. Well part of me does. I hate her, but I love her. Lance is the only person who can't seem to understand that." Joey ran his hand over his scalp. Sometimes he missed having hair to run his fingers through when he was thinking. The slight stubble he had just didn't do the same thing. "Has Lance actually sat down and talked to you yet?" Justin shook his head. "I haven't really talked to Lance in months. I don't think he wants to talk to me. Hell, I've talked to AJ about it, who I never really talk to, and not one of my closest friends." Justin threw the ball against the wall as hard as he could. Joey ducked as it ricocheted off the wall. "Hey careful there Curly." "Sorry." Joey pulled Justin into a hug. "Lance isn't avoiding you Justin. He always gets like this before a tour. It's tough for him to get everything at FreeLance under control enough that he feels comfortable enough to leave." "I know that Joey. All of us are really busy before a tour though. Everyone else manages to make time for each other. Lance just isolates himself on purpose. But you know what Joey. Lance had plenty of time before we began this tour stress period. He just didn't want to." Justin tensed up in Joey's arms. Joey knew that he couldn't let Lance talk to Justin now. He was too upset at Lance. Joey let go of Justin. "Wait here. I'll be right back." Joey quickly ran out of the room, looking for Lance. He ran into his outside the main room. "Lance, forget the plan. Now is definitely not the time for you to talk to Justin. We'll all get together and talk later." Joey turned and headed back, leaving a surprised Lance standing there. He wandered down the hall, lost in thought. He should have told Britney was going to be on the tour. It wasn't that he wanted to hurt Justin. He loved Justin. He had honestly forgotten to call him after the meeting. "Lance Bass, fancy meeting you here." Lance looked down and saw an exhausted Britney sitting on the ground. Her hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail and she was wearing sweaty workout clothes. "Hi Britney." He stopped, slightly surprised she was talking to him. Britney patted the ground next to her. "Pull up some floor. I need to talk business with you." Lance sat down next to her. Unfortunately, Britney was one of the artists on FreeLance. He had picked up her contract as a favor to Justin when Jive dropped her. "What can I do for you Britney?" "I need to talk to you about the guy you gave me." "Mike?" "Yeah Mike. I don't like him Lance. I just don't think he is that competent. I want you to manage me personally." Lance began to laugh at her. "Britney I don't personally manage anyone. You are not going to get me to take you as my only artist. Sorry dear. Mike is your guy. He's good." She pouted. "He treats me like shit Lance. He acts like I am a poor excuse for an artist, especially now that he has nothing to do for me since I can't do any publicity stuff." Lance just shrugged. "I can't help you Britney. Mike really is a good guy." "Okay well can I ask you something else?" "Sure." "Is my career over?" Lance was quiet as he thought. He looked at the scared woman in front of him. He hadn't seen Britney this frightened about something ever. "No. I'm not going to stop representing you or promoting you. I may not like you, but you are an artist and a well-known one at that. You are more then just Justin's girlfriend." "Ex-girlfriend." She paused. "I really miss him Lance." Tears formed in Britney's eyes. Lance's heart softened. He hugged Britney, letting her cry on his shoulder. 'What a sucker' Britney thought to herself. She knew she could play on Lance's soft side. It hadn't worked with the other faggots in the groups, but she knew Lance couldn't ignore a crying woman. Britney had just formed an unlikely ally. "Britney don't cry. Maybe you and Justin can work it out. And as for your career. We'll get you back in the studio as soon as you are done in Europe. A new album will help things." "Promise Lance?" He hugged her tightly. "I promise Britney." She hugged him back. This was so easy. Time to turn him against the rest. "You are the only person who has been nice to me Lance. Everyone else has been so mean. This morning Busta chewed up my sneakers and all Chris did was laugh." "I'm sorry about that Brit. I can't control what the other guys do though. I promise I will be your friend though. You can always come to me." "Thanks Lance." There was a loud whistle from the main room. Lance sighed. That meant 'Nsync was back on stage and the Backstreet Boys were on break. "Justin come on pass me the damn ball! I want to get one more shot in before it's time to go back!" Joey shouted to him. "Sorry old man! You snooze you lose!" Justin felt so much better after talking to Joey. After he had disappeared and then re-appeared, the two of them had talked about Britney. Joey had let him get a lot of his frustrations and pent-up feelings out. He felt so guilty for doing what he had done to her. Justin did love her, he just couldn't be with her. She was too crazy. Joey had been a little surprised at how strongly Justin still felt about Britney. He hadn't really told anyone how much it hurt to have them make fun of her. Justin had asked that Joey not torture Britney and he planned on talking to everyone else. "Old man! Who do you think I am, Kevin? Just give me the damn ball kiddo." Justin dribbled over to Joey, standing in front of him. "You want the ball old man? Then take it." Joey lunged for the ball, trying to steal it from Justin. Justin spun away from him. Joey stumbled and fell onto his knees. "Ouch!" Joey grabbed his right knee and collapsed in pain. Justin rushed over to him, holding the ball. "Oh my god! Joey are you okay?" He helped Joey sit up. "My knee. Please Justin it hurts." Justin put the ball down and carefully examined Joey's knee. They were all fairly good at figuring out how severe an injury was after all these years. He stretched Joey's leg out, moving it carefully. All of a sudden, Joey leapt up, grabbed the ball and took a shot. Nothing but net. "Old man my ass." Joey laughed at Justin. "Don't do that Joey. That's not cool." "Sorry Just." Joey walked over to Justin and held his hand out to him. Justin grabbed it tightly. Joey pulled up allowing Justin to take advantage of Joey's off-balance stance. He pulled down, sending Joey to the floor. He quickly jumped on top of him and tried to pin him. The two of them began to wrestle around. Joey finally pinned Justin under him. He always won. Justin had yet to pin Joey in all the years they had been friends. "I win!" Joey rolled off of him. They both lay on their backs, breathing heavily. "Damn I could use a nap now." Justin sighed. "Whose the old man now Curly?" Joey rolled onto his side looking at Justin with a silly grin on his face. Justin laughed at him. There was a loud whistle from the main room. Both Justin and Joey groaned and sat up. 'Nsync was up and the Backstreet Boys got to rest. "Fatima is going to be pissed at us." Justin said to Joey as they both shuffled out, exhausted from the game and the impromptu wrestling match. "What are we working on?" "Rock 'n' Roll and Playtime." Joey groaned again. "The two hardest routines we have. You would've thought Fatima would have gotten them out of the way with first." "Oh well." Justin froze mid-sentence. Joey bumped into him. He followed Justin's line of vision and was shocked at what he saw. Lance was hugging Britney. What the hell was that? "No wonder he hasn't talked to me." Justin mumbled and walked away. Joey watched as Lance squeezed Britney's hand. "It'll be fine Britney. Don't worry about it. I'll take care of everything." "Thanks Lance." Lance gave her a kiss on the cheek and turned around. He saw Joey standing there, staring at him with a shocked look on his face. "Joey wait! I can explain." "Save it Lance. We have work to do." Joey walked away, leaving Lance standing there. Britney put her hand on Lance's shoulder. He stared at it, taking in every part of her hand, feeling the weight of her slender hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry." Lance nodded and walked away from her. Chapter 6 Lance rested his head on Jean-Michel's shoulder. "Lance, stay awake or else you won't sleep on the plane." Chris didn't even look up from his paper when he spoke to Lance. Lance sighed and sat back up. No one was really talking to him. He had tried to explain to them that it was just business between him and Britney, but no one was buying that excuse. "I promise everything will work out eventually James." Jean-Michel whispered to him in French. "Until then I just have to suffer? Is that it?" He followed Jean's lead and answered him in French. This way no one knew what they were saying. "No." "No. What kind of answer is that?" Lance scowled at him. "Do not yell at me James because your friends are acting like jerks in your eyes." "I'm not yelling Jean-Michel. I'm talking in normal tone of voice. I just don't like your answer. What do you mean by that?" "Stop isolating yourself. If anything, you have pushed them away more. Instead of telling them immediately what happened, you waited until later. They have every reason not to trust you." "Every time I try to talk to any of them, they just act like I am not there. Even Josh won't talk to me." Chris leaned over. "Hi, fluent in French. Why don't you guys stop arguing? Lance, don't push Jean-Michel away too. And the only person you need to talk to is Justin. So stop acting like a pussy and just do it." "Dammit Chris when did you learn French?" Jean-Michel blushed and cleared his throat. "Actually I started to teach him on the last tour. I guess you continued to learn after the tour yes Chris. By the way, that was very good." "Thanks Jean. Lance go talk to Justin okay. He wants you to talk to him about this. And I would do it before everyone else gets here. None of the BSB guys are here. JC and Joey aren't here. Go talk to him." Lance nodded and walked over to Justin, who was sitting with his eyes slightly closed and a cup of coffee in his hand. He was listening to music on an old Discman he had. Lance smiled. Justin still liked to listen to music on CD despite the fact the micro discs were much better quality. Lance sat down next to Justin, who opened his eyes and looked at him. He took off his headphones and turned the CD off. "What do you want Lance?" "We really need to talk Justin." "We've needed to talk for a long time Lance. Why choose now as we are about to get on a plane for France?" "Because I can't take this anymore. I'm being treated like the enemy and the only way to fix that is to talk to you." Justin's guard immediately flared up. "I am not the reason you are being treated like the enemy. Consort with the enemy and you become the enemy." "She's my client for Christ sakes! I can't just abandon the contracts we signed because you stopped dating her." "This is about loyalty and friendship Lance. I thought I knew you. The Lance I know, the James I know would never stab me in the back the way you have with this whole Britney shit." "I didn't stab you in the back Justin. I just didn't do things the way the rest of you did. Britney is a human being Justin. She doesn't deserve to be treated like garbage." "I don't want to debate Britney's self-worth. You don't have to tell me that Lance. I love Britney. I just can't live with Britney. She drives me crazy." "How come you couldn't end it some other way then? Why humiliate her and turn her into the joke of the music industry?" "Because she's humiliated me for years! Do you know what people called me? Did you ever listen to what people said about me?" Lance shook his head. "Mr. Spears was a popular one. Britney's shadow. The respect people had for me was gone. I was a joke because of how she treated me. It was only fair for her to get the same treatment I got." Lance was silent. Justin watched him closely. When Lance got upset about something, he developed a twitch in his left eye. That was how the guys had quickly learned to gauge how upset Lance was. Justin watched as the eye began to jump slightly. "I'm sorry I wasn't more of a friend to you Justin. I guess I didn't want to be. I love you Justin, but I can't accept what you did to Britney no matter what your reasons are." Lance stood up and walked away from him. "Don't you fucking walk away from me James Lance Bass! Get your ass over here! We are finishing this now!" Justin stood up, his coffee spilling on the floor. His face was bright red and he was angry, very visibly angry. Chris and Jean-Michel stood up and began to walk to the door. "Don't you two move! I want you two listen to the bullshit Mr. Bass is about to spit out about it being his job and shit like that. Don't let me be the only one who gets to hear your excuses Lance. I think everyone should hear these." Lance turned to Justin, his face looking like it was set in stone. Chris and Jean-Michel stood next to each other, not wanting to move, but not wanting to witness this at all. "Don't ever, ever speak to me like that again Justin Timberlake. I've done nothing but take care of your sorry ass for years. I deserve at least a little respect for all the shit you've put me through." "The shit I put you through! What about the shit you put me through? Put all of us through?" Justin screamed at Lance, his voice filled with disbelief. "What have I ever done to you Justin?" Chris closed his eyes, knowing what was coming. Lance knew about this. Why was he pushing Justin towards this with Jean-Michel standing right there? Or had he forgotten about that night in LA? "Do you really want me to say it Lance? Look who is here with us." Chris grabbed Jean-Michel by the shirt and dragged him out of the room before he could hear the truth. He slammed the door behind them and pulled Jean-Michel down the hall. "Christopher! Have you gone mad? Let me go!" Chris released the surprised Jean-Michel. "Why did you do that?" "Jean I like you. I consider you a close friend. Not because you are dating Lance, but because of who you are. I didn't want you to hear that okay. Just trust me. I'm doing this for your own good." Jean-Michel was silent as he processed what might have been said and why Chris dragged him out of the room. "What did James do in LA?" Chris slid to the ground, shaking his head. Jean-Michel sat down next to him. "I guess the question I should really ask is who did Lance do in LA?" "Don't threaten me Justin. I'm not afraid of you." "I'm not asking you to be afraid of me. Let me ask you something though. Did you tell Jean-Michel about Seth?" Lance's face lost all color. He was always pale, but now he was completely white. There was nothing left but shock and fear. "You wouldn't." He tried to sound sure of himself, but his voice was shaking. "You're right. I wouldn't. I couldn't do that to a friend. But just so you know, that horrible, sinking feeling of betrayal that is washing over you right now, I felt that. And you caused that feeling. All you had to do was call. Pick up the phone and dial the digits. Say to me: Hey Justin. We couldn't get her off the first part of the tour. Just thought I would let you know. It's not too tough Lance." "I forgot okay Justin. I'm sorry. How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?" "Once would have done it." "I said I was sorry that day." "No, you never said you were sorry. All you did was ignore it." Lance's face fell. Justin was right. He had totally ignored the fact he had fucked up, hoping the problem would go away. "Justin. I fucked up okay. I didn't think about what I was doing and who I was hurting. I was too worried about everything being okay on the tour. I was too worried about getting stuff done for FreeLance. I was too worried about myself and how I was going to perform this time around. What I did was unforgivable and I know that. I don't want your forgiveness. I just want your friendship back. If you will give me that, I will promise not to fuck it up this time." Justin stared at him, not blinking, not moving. Lance began to fidget under Justin's cold gaze. Finally, Justin blinked and changed his expression. "You have to promise me one thing." "Anything Justin." "Tell Jean-Michel about Seth and about what happened in LA." They heard a commotion outside the door. JC's voice was heard above everyone else's. He wasn't going to be held outside long by Chris no matter what. "I don't know if I can do that Justin. I'll lose him forever." Lance's heart seized up at the thought of losing Jean-Michel. If he lost him, Lance knew he wouldn't be able to go on. "Did you bring the games Joey?" JC walked backwards, looking at Joey. Joey smiled at the grin on JC's face. The two of them had been spending a lot of time working on JC's attitude about life and this tour. In the past few days, JC had been so excited about heading out on tour. "Of course I did. We are going to have so much fun on the plane Josh." "Thanks for helping me out Joey. I really appreciate it." "You are my friend. I'm going to always watch out for you. Hey, speaking of watching out for you, how's Natalie?" JC smiled. "We decided to just be friends. We have a lot of fun together, but neither of us want to try to have a relationship while I am on tour." "So basically for the first time ever, you ended a relationship, even though it was only dating, and you are still going to be friends with the person?" JC nodded. Joey grabbed him in a headlock and gave him a noogie, messing up JC's platinum blond hair. "I'm really proud of you Josh. That's a big step for you." "That's great Joey. Can you let me go? You're hurting me." Joey laughed and let JC go. They wandered down the hall slowly, talking about nothing in particular. In front of them were two bodyguards and behind them were another two. The record label was taking no chances. Each band had five bodyguards assigned to them. As they approached the private waiting room for the BSB and 'Nsync, Joey and JC saw Chris and Jean-Michel sitting in silence outside. Joey shrugged and walked towards the door to open it. "Stop. Don't go in Joey." Chris jumped up and pulled Joey back. "Why? I want some coffee." "Justin and Lance are in there." JC pushed past Joey and Chris, trying to get inside. Jean-Michel grabbed him. "Josh let Justin and Lance talk. They need this." "They can't be alone. I promised Justin. Let me be with Justin." "Josh. Trust me. Justin is fine. Let Lance suffer for a bit. He deserves it." JC looked at Jean-Michel a little confused by his attitude. First off, Jean-Michel never called Lance anything other then James. He had never called him Lance before. Second, he never wanted Lance to be hurt. He always protected him. What had happened? "So how long have they been in there?" Chris sighed and sat back down. The bodyguards had set up a little barrier between the rest of the hall and 'Nsync. "About 10 minutes ago, Lance went over to talk to Justin. Then all hell broke loose. Justin began to yell at Lance. Lance began to yell back. Justin started to bring up LA. I grabbed Jean-Michel and pulled him out of there before he heard anything." Jean-Michel scowled at Chris as he mentioned LA again. "However I am not stupid. I am taking a wild guess that Lance cheated on me when he was in LA. I just want to know with who and why. Christopher here refuses to tell me." "Jean that needs to come from Lance. He's the only one who has the right to talk to you about this." "No he has no rights anymore. He lost those when he fucked someone else and did not tell me. Someone tell me!" The three of them exchanged glances and looked towards the door. Jean-Michel didn't get angry about anything. He had just yelled. That was definitely not something the guys were used to. JC walked forward and put his arm around Jean-Michel. "Let's take a walk." Joey and Chris started to follow them, but decided that JC was probably the best person to talk to Jean-Michel about this. He had been the one who found Lance and Seth. Lance shuddered as he heard Jean-Michel shout 'Someone tell me'. He had obviously figured out what it was Lance was hiding. "I don't think I need to promise Justin. I'm pretty sure he figured it out already. Thanks so much. Now I've lost him." Tears filled Lance's eyes as he thought about what he had done. "Joshua, will you please stop side-stepping the issue? Tell me who Lance fucked in LA." Josh looked around and motioned to the bodyguard who had followed them to step back. He dropped his voice and turned to Jean-Michel. "Last year when we were in LA for a charity concert, we all went out to a club. This was when you had to fly back to Orlando to take care of some business with management. Well we ran into an old friend of ours, Seth Green from the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer. We all partied really hard that night. Lance and Seth were the last to leave the club. None of us saw them go their separate ways. We just assumed Lance had the limo take him home. The next morning I went to Lance's room to wake him up for an interview we had. They were in bed together. I'm sorry Jean. I didn't want to be the one to tell you this." Jean-Michel was quiet. He just nodded stiffly and began to walk away. JC was ready to cry himself, knowing that he had just broken someone's heart. "Jean, please wait up." He followed him and stepped in front of him. "I need to go check on the arrival time for the BSB. Let me go Joshua." "Will you just talk to me first Jean? I think we need to talk about this." Jean-Michel shook his head. "There is nothing to talk about. Lance cheated on me. Lance is gone. It is that simple. I still have a job to do. I work for all of you, not just him." "Are you going to be okay?" "Oh I will be just fine Joshua. I just found out the man that I love fucked someone while he was drunk and decided not to tell me. I am just fine." Jean-Michel began to sob, sliding to the ground. JC cradled him in his arms and let him cry. "Why Josh? Why did Lance do it?" "I don't know." Chris and Joey sat quietly outside the door. They didn't know what to do now. "What just happened?" Joey asked Chris. "I think we somehow broke up Lance and Jean-Michel. Indirectly of course." "Do you think he'll leave him because of this?" "What would you do if you found out Kimmie had cheated on you?" Joey was quiet. He looked at Chris. "Leave her." Chris nodded slowly. "Would you leave Danielle?" "I've already had to cross that bridge Joey and we are still together. I can't imagine my life without her." Joey stared at him in disbelief. "When did she cheat on you? And how come you didn't tell me?" "It was a long time ago. We had only been together a few months. We talked about it and we decided that we could get past it. And I didn't tell you because it wasn't anyone else's business. It was mine and Danielle's only." "Why are you telling me now?" Chris shrugged. "I guess because you asked. I don't like to hide the truth from anyone. Especially you Joey. You're my best friend." "Should we go check on JC and Jean-Michel?" "Yeah. You take them. I'll take the Lance/Justin room." "Agreed." Joey grabbed a bodyguard and had his radio the guy who had followed JC and Jean-Michel. Joey shifted back and forth on his feet, impatiently waiting to find out where they were. Finally, the bodyguard headed in one direction, motioning for Joey to follow him. "Mr. Chasez and Mr. Garvonne are down this hall Mr. Fatone." Joey nodded and pushed passed him. He saw JC and Jean-Michel sitting on the ground hugging. Both of them were crying. Joey sighed and walked forward slowly. Whatever happened happened. He couldn't change what Lance had done and he couldn't change the way Jean-Michel was feeling right now. He would hate to lose Jean-Michel though. Joey really like him. JC lifted his head and saw through teary eyes that Joey was approaching them. He shook Jean-Michel slightly and pointed to Joey. Jean-Michel wiped his eyes and turned towards Joey. "Hello Joseph." "Jean-Michel, Josh. Can I join you?" Jean-Michel nodded and scooted over, letting Joey sit between the two of them. Joey put his arm around Jean-Michel and squeezed his shoulder reassuringly. "Are you okay Jean?" "Not really. How long have you known?" Joey looked away. "Since Josh found them that morning. He came to me immediately." Jean-Michel nodded stiffly. "I am glad to know that all of you respected Lance's wishes not to tell me. You all are good friends to him. However, I feel like you should have told me as a friend." Joey nodded and hugged Jean-Michel tightly. "Do you know what you are going to do?" Jean-Michel nodded. "I am not leaving Lance. I love him too much to do that. He means too much to me. I cannot forgive him for this easily though." JC nodded. "You're a bigger man then me Jean. I wouldn't be able to handle someone cheating on me." "Neither would I Jean. If Kimmie cheated on me, I think it would be over." "Well I thought the same thing, but I cannot imagine my life without Lance now that he has been a part of it for so long. I want to hear him say that he cheated on me though, so I need to talk to him before we get on the plane." Chris opened the door to find Lance crying on Justin shoulder. Justin looked extremely uncomfortable how the situation had turned out. It didn't turn out quite the way he had wanted it to. Chris relieved him of the crying Lance and let him go sit down. "James, look at me." Lance looked up, his face red and tear-stained. "Does he know?" Lance choked out in between sobs. Chris nodded, wishing he could have said no. Lance let out a cry of anguish. "It's not the end of the world though. Until you two talk, you don't know how the situation is going to turn out." Lance shook his head as he sobbed on Chris' shoulder. "He said he would leave me if he found out I cheated on him. I lost the only person I have ever loved!" "You haven't lost him yet. Just talk to him. Jean-Michel is a reasonable person. Until you are in the situation, you really don't know how you are going to react. I thought I would leave Danielle if she ever cheated on me, but when it happened, I couldn't imagine my life without her." "Dani cheated on you?" Chris nodded, wiping the tears off a slightly calmer Lance's face. "And we are stronger because it happened. We know what we are each capable of handling and we know how much we love each other. Just talk to Jean-Michel." Justin came up behind Lance and began to rub his back as Chris comforted him. He felt bad for being the one to bring it up. The last thing he had wanted to do was break up Jean-Michel and Lance. They were such a perfect couple. And Jean-Michel was such a good friend to all of them. Justin would hate to see him leave the tour because of this. "James?" Lance turned to look at Justin. "It's okay. I know you didn't mean it. The stupidness between us is over as of now." "Thanks Curly." Lance wrapped his arms around Justin, squeezing him tightly. "Hey no problem Scoop, but can you let go? I can't breathe." The three of them chuckled as Lance let go of Justin. The door opened and Joey and JC walked in. Lance searched behind them for a sign of Jean-Michel. He was slightly relieved not to see him and not to deal with the situation for the moment. "So how's everyone in here doing?" Joey tried to lighten up the situation. He failed miserably. The door opened again and Jean-Michel walked in, carrying a pile of papers he had to go over. Justin, Chris, JC, and Joey watched in fear as Lance and Jean-Michel faced each other. Joey and JC knew how Jean-Michel said he felt, but who knows what was going to happen now that he was actually looking at Lance. Lance stared at his boyfriend, trying to think of what he could say to make it better. "Stop trying so hard Lance. Just tell me the truth." Lance nodded and took a deep breath. Suddenly self-conscious, he looked around at the other four guys. Jean-Michel followed his gaze and nodded slightly. "Could you please excuse us for a moment? Lance and I need to talk in private." The four guys turned to file out. Chris hung back for a moment. "If you need me, I'll be right outside." He left leaving Lance and Jean-Michel alone. "Go ahead Lance." "I wish you wouldn't call me that." Jean-Michel shrugged, not answering him. "I guess it's time to face the truth." Lance's voice shook under Jean-Michel's gaze. Lance stopped stalling. He closed his eyes and began to talk. "Last February, when we were in LA for the charity show we did with MTV, we ran into a friend. His name is Seth. He joined us when we went out that night. I got really drunk. So did Seth. We were having a great time, drinking and dancing. The other guys left, leaving the limo for me. Seth and I kept drinking and dancing for a few more hours. One thing led to another and he came back to the hotel with me. I'm not proud of what happened. I'm actually very embarrassed about it." "Did you have sex with him?" Lance opened his eyes and looked directly into Jean-Michel's eyes. He nodded. Jean-Michel let a sob escape from his lips. Lance gathered him in his arms automatically, not thinking. Jean-Michel pushed him away, "Do not touch me! I cannot even look at you right now." Lance hung his head. "I'm sorry." "Sorry does not cut it. It will take some time for me to trust you again Lance." Lance looked up, shocked at Jean's words. "You're not leaving me?" Jean-Michel shook his head. "Lance I love you. When I said I would not leave you I meant it. I do not break my promises. This is going to take some time." "Can you call me James?" Jean-Michel shook his head. "Not yet." Lance swallowed hard. This was more then he had expected. He had been so sure he had lost Jean-Michel over his stupidity. Jean-Michel closed his eyes for a moment. He loved Lance with all his heart. He didn't want to lose him. He opened his eyes again and walked to the door. All the guys scattered as he opened it. "You can all come back in now. Lance and I are done talking for now." The four 'Nsync guys filed back in followed by all the BSB, Allie, Casey, and another seven bodyguards. Joey and JC hung back to talk to Jean-Michel. "Everyone arrived at the same time." Joey said almost apologetically to Jean-Michel. "It's okay Joseph. Lance and I are fine." Joey looked at him, slightly confused. "We will talk on the plane if Joshua will let me steal you for a spell." JC grinned. "Of course Jean. But I get to keep the games." The three of them laughed and went into the room with everyone else. Brian sighed as he flipped through the noted and then scanned the crowd of people. The bodyguards had all grabbed some coffee and set themselves up around the exterior of the room. 'Nsync was scattered around the room. They all seemed uneasy and slightly tense. AJ and Kevin were still half-asleep. Kevin's entire family had spent the whole Christmas/New Years vacation at their house. Howie was a little teary-eyed. Brian had felt so bad when he had to pull him away from Ameena and Luna earlier this morning. Nick, Allie, Casey, and Justin had all claimed a couch and were all cuddled up together. "Excuse me! Can I have everyone's attention?" The room fell silent except for the sound of Busta chewing on a bone. "First thing. Britney and her dancers are on another flight, so it's just us on this flight. And we got the private jet, so seating is two by two still, but we have a separate room as well with a TV and couches. Two is anyone else changing seats beside Justin sitting with Casey? We have one open seat since there is an odd number of us. Who wants that?" Jean-Michel raised his hand quickly. "I would like to sit alone if that is okay with everyone else?" Brian looked down at the seating chart. "That's fine. I'll sit with Lance then." Lance sighed and closed his eyes. What a morning. He took a quick glance at his watch and shut his eyes again. 7:30. The flight was in half an hour. He was exhausted. Lance listened to Brian with little interest. His mind wandered to what he had done so many months ago. It had just been sex with Seth. He felt nothing for him besides friendship. He loved Jean-Michel with all his heart. Lance was still shocked that he hadn't broken up with him immediately. Lance's mind continued to wander. Time passed unknowingly for him as he drifted between sleep and consciousness. Lance felt himself being shaken by someone. He opened his eyes and looked into Brian's face. "Come on Lance boy. Time to jump onboard." Lance yawned and stretched. Everyone else had left the room and gotten on the plane. Only he and Brian were left in the room. "I'm scum Brian. Total scum." Brian put his arm around Lance. "No you aren't. You made a mistake that's all. We'll talk more on the plane. C'mon we're going to be late." Lance nodded and followed Brian, unconvinced by his words. He was scum. ---All righty then. All finished chapters 5 and 6. Hope ya'll enjoyed it. Sorry it took so long, but hey I'm in college. I'm amazed that I finish them at all.