Date: Sun, 07 Jan 2001 13:02:53 -0600 From: Danni Bailey Subject: Decisions - Chapter 23 Disclaimer....As with all of the other chapters, this one contains homosexual themes. If you are under the age of 18, or if topics of this nature offend you, don't read any further. I have no knowledge of the sexual preferences of the celebrities named in this story. It's just a story. Chapter 23 Justin could never remember his body aching like it did right now. He was sure that the Tylenol Mark had given him earlier would have offered some relief, but it had little of no effect. Justin dangled his legs over the end of the stage and watched while Atlas made himself at home at Madison Square Garden. He and Busta had become best buddies and had become accustomed to frolicking in some of the most well known venues across the US. Usually, Justin would join them, running up and down the aisles, giving them a well-needed workout. Not today. All he could think about was enjoying the ten minute break they had managed to squeeze out of Wade. Danni sat down next to him and put the palm of her hand on his forehead. "I thought so" she concluded, "You have a fever. Your face is bright red." "Nah, I'm fine," he assured her. "Just tired and sore, and Wade is a maniac. We had to beg the guy for a break." No sooner was it out of his mouth, then the sound of Wade's voice could be heard coming through the speakers. "Let's go guys, we have a lot of work to do. Let's start from the top. That opening number needs help." Justin was in no mood for Wade's criticism. "From the top? Are you out of your mind? We've done it 5 times already. Let's move on." "Justin, when you get the choreography right, we'll move on." JC only had to look at Justin to see how angry he was. "Let it go, J." "Like hell I'll let it go! Wade are you saying I'm the one screwing up?" "I'm saying the dance looks like shit and the HBO concert is in two days. Do want to rehearse or argue?" "What I want is an answer!" "Ok, you're adding moves that aren't supposed to be there. Just do the choreography like I taught it to you and we'll be fine." Chris grabbed Justin's arm and pulled him away from the end of the stage. "Come on, let's just get this over with. Suddenly, Chris felt the heat radiating from his young friend's body. "Jesus, Justin you're burning up! This rehearsal is over." "No it's not!" Wade yelled. "If Justin is too tired, he can sit it out, but we are going through it one more time. With or without him!" "I'm in!" Justin yelled back at Wade, and then turning to Chris he added. "I wonder if his dick is as big as his ego?" Chris laughed loudly. "Not sure, but if it is......wow! Justin took his starting position, tired, hot and aching. The music started and he was determined to give it 100%. If he did it perfectly, maybe Wade would back off. The phone rang in Johnny's makeshift office. You and Johnny were taking one last look at the details for the next 4 shows. Things had run smoothly on the tour so far, but with HBO coming in this week, Johnny wanted to ensure everything went smoothly. You could tell he was somewhat irritated by the interruption, but Johnny never failed to take a call. He had total faith in his staff. If they called, he assumed it was important. He could tell by Lance's voice that something was wrong. "Johnny, we need you and Gary down here now!" "What's the hell wrong, Lance?" Johnny asked immediately. "It's Justin. He passed out. We've paged Mark and he's on his way from the hotel." Johnny hung up the phone without responding. He looked at you and you didn't even have to ask. You knew something had happened to Justin. "What happened to him?" "I didn't get any details, but Justin passed out. They need us down at the stage." By the time you made your way to the stage area, Justin was conscience again, but barely. He was lying on the sofa that they used during the concert and his head was resting on Wade's lap. His skin was a ghostly white and he lay motionless with his eyes only half open. A wet towel was draped across his forehead in a meager attempt to cool him off, but as you touched his hand you could feel just how hot he was. "Chris, tell them to cut these stage lights! It's gotta be close to 100 degrees up here!" You looked at Wade who sat virtually immobile cradling Justin's head. "Wade, help me get his shirt off." He didn't respond. "Wade!" Still nothing. "We've got to get him cooled down. Are you gonna help me or not?" Finally, Wade slowly lifted his head and your eyes met. "Gary, I'm so sorry. I never meant anything to happen to him. I just wanted him to be perfect." You had no idea what had gone on, but whatever it was could wait until later. By the time you got his shirt off and loosened his pants Mark had arrived and you breathed a sigh of relief. "Ok, somebody fill me in? What the hell happened?" Wade spoke softly. "It my fault. I pushed him too hard. He was tired, but I wanted to go over the routine one more time. Halfway through it, he started turning really pale and I yelled at Joey to grab him. He just collapsed." "Ok, first things first." He took the thermoscan from his bag and placed it gently in Justin's ear. "We need to get him moved to some place that's air conditioned, or better yet a cold shower, his temperature is over 104." With the help of the others, you managed to get Justin backstage, and once the cool water of the shower hit his body, he perked up quickly. "Hey, are you guys trying to drown me or what?" he said from his haze. Chris of course was the first to respond, using his humor to cover his concern. "Damn Curly, you figured it out. I was tired of you being the pretty boy of the group. I figured if I got you out of the way I'd get some well deserved attention." Justin smiled slightly. "I'm feeling kinda dizzy. Can I just lay down for a minute?" Mark answered him sternly. "You're gonna be laying down for more than a few minutes! How many times have I told you to drink plenty of water when you're rehearsing?" Justin answered softly as you helped him dry off. "About a million." "Then son, why don't you listen? We've had this discussion before, Justin. Being as dehydrated as you are is dangerous. Your body can't withstand the high temperatures that you are exposing it to." "I'm sorry," he said sincerely. "Well, you don't need a lecture right now. What you need is some fluids." He reached into his bag and you could see the panic in Justin's eyes. "No, Mark! I don't want an IV. I'll drink water. I promise." "Sit back in the recliner, Justin" Mark said calmly. "You'll feel much better in a few minutes." "Mark please!" Justin begged. "Justin, please don't make this any harder for me than it already is. I'm just doing what I have to. You are totally dehydrated. You need fluids and this is the quickest way." Justin nodded and sat back in the recliner. Reluctantly, he put his arm on the armrest and only winced slightly when Mark put the needle in the back of his hand. As Justin worked on a bottle of Gatorade, Mark checked his temperature again and was glad to see that it had dropped significantly. It was still close to 100, but had eased down from the dangerous level it had been at minutes ago. With Justin somewhat settled, Mark motioned to Johnny. "Can I see you and Wade privately for a minute please?" The three men stepped into the hall and Mark immediately began his assault on Wade. "I'm not real sure what the fuck happened during the rehearsal today, but it better never happen again, do you understand me? Wade only nodded. "Justin will never admit he's had enough. Obviously, he'll keep dancing until he drops. It's your responsibility to make sure that doesn't happen. You need to look for signs of dehydration and exhaustion and if you don't know what they are then you need to ask. There is no excuse for what happened today!" It was evident Wade was very upset. "I take full responsibility. It was totally my fault and it won't happen again. I just wanted him to be perfect for the show. "Well, that brings up my next point," Mark interjected. "I'm pulling Justin from tonight's show." "What?" Johnny said angrily. "Mark, the show is in five hours. There is no way we can cancel now! This is Madison Square Garden. You can't pull him from this show! "My answer is final. The only thing left to do is to decide is who's gonna tell him." "I'll tell him," Wade said softly. "I'm responsible for what happened." Johnny's head was swimming. He took a big risk when he hired Wade for this job. He had great credentials and there was no doubt of his dancing ability, but his age was a major drawback. Joe Tremaine had convinced him that Wade was not only mature, but was all business. Admittedly, knowing Wade's background had heavily influenced Johnny's decision. Joe Tremaine had hired him as an instructor at the age of 13, not only for his ability, but also as an opportunity for him to escape an abusive father. Much like Justin, Wade had lived in a world of adults. Unfortunately, unlike *NSYNC's junior member who had his family's support, Wade was on his own and the scars of his early childhood were evident. He let no one get close to him and 'fun' was not a word in his vocabulary. "Wade, I'm not sure that's such a good idea," Johnny concluded. "You and Justin are not on the best of terms. I'm thinking we should let Gary handle this." "Look, you hired me to do a job, and I made a mistake. I need to face that. You're basing your decision on my age and that's wrong. I can handle myself just fine." "Ok, if you think you can handle it, then I'll leave it up to you. When you talk to him, ask the rest of the guys to step outside. I need to fill them in and I think its best if you talk to Justin in private." Wade took a deep breath before opening the door. This was not going to be easy and he knew it. Justin was a veteran performer and pulling him from this show was gonna hit hard. Wade could feel the tension in the air as he entered the room. "Excuse me, Johnny wants to talk to you guys and I need a few minutes to talk to Justin. Would you guys mind stepping out in the hall please?" Chris was having a hard time controlling his temper. "Haven't you done enough talking for one day?" Wade facial expression never changed. "I need to talk to Justin and Johnny's waiting." Without saying a word the guys stepped into the hall and you looked at Justin wondering whether to stay or go. "Justin?" "I'm fine Gary, I'm sure this isn't gonna take very long. I'm not really in the mood to talk." You joined the others in the hall, closing the door behind you as you left. Wade pulled up a stool and sat next Justin. "You're right. This won't take long. First I want say I'm sorry for what happened. I guess I thought you were in better shape and that's my fault. I should have picked up on that." Justin could hardly believe what he was hearing. "Wade, I'm in great shape, but damn you had us do that dance six times. I was fucking tired." Wade voice was matter of fact. "Then you're not in great shape. That song is 4 minutes long. If you can't dance for 24 minutes without loosing it, then you need to consider some conditioning." Justin could only shake his head. He had never met anyone as cold as Wade. "There is something else I need to discuss with you." Wade continued. "Johnny and I just had a discussion with Mark. He's pulling you from the show tonight." "What! I'm out of the show! I hate you Wade! I fucking hate you!" Justin pulled back and hit Wade squarely on the jaw with all his might, sending his body flying backwards. Disregarding the consequences, he pulled the IV from hand and stormed out of the room. He could tell from the looks on their faces, that the others had been told. "So it's true! He looked directly at Johnny. "I can't believe you would do this without even discussing it with me. I worked my ass off for you. I gave you 100% and this is what I get in return. If I don't do the show tonight then you can do the fucking HBO special without me too! I'm outta here! He turned to Lonnie. "Take me back to the hotel, now!" Lonnie looked your way and you nodded. Justin needed some time to cool off before anyone tried to talk to him. "Lonnie, I'm you're fucking employer, not him. When I tell you to do something just do it, don't question it. You got it!" You could see the hurt in Lonnie's eyes. "Yes, sir I got it." "Good, and someone may want to check on Wade. We certainly don't want anything to happen to the star choreographer! Maybe he can fill in for me on Thursday!" Justin stormed out, with Lonnie close behind him, leaving the rest of you in hall amazed by what had just transpired. Mark finally broke the silence. "I'm gonna check on Wade. Danni would you mind giving me a hand?" "Sure, not at all" she said quickly. Danni was grateful to have an escape from what had become a very ugly scene. "Would someone like to fill me in on some details here?" you asked angrily. "What the hell happened between those two?" "Gary, its not just today," JC began. "It's a constant thing with those two. Wade cuts Justin no slack. He rides him constantly. Today, Justin was really tired. We did the opening number 6 times because Wade was saying there was mistakes. I don't know what he was seeing, but I thought the piece went fine. After the break, Wade wanted to start from the top again and he and Justin got into it. When Chris noticed Justin was so hot he told Wade to stop the rehearsal, but Wade wouldn't give in. He said if Justin was too tired he could sit it out, but we'd do the piece without him. Gary, that was like a dare to Justin. You know he was not gonna sit it out while the rest of us rehearsed. Halfway through the song he just collapsed. Wade carried him to the sofa and put that wet towel on his head. We paged Mark, and then called you guys." Johnny spoke up. "Listen, I'm not happy with Wade at all right now, but in his defense, he did take full responsibility for what happened today. He knows he screwed up." Chris was livid. "That's putting it mildly. Thanks to him, we're canceling a show at Madison Square Garden. It's the only concert we've ever had to cancel. I hope the little prick is proud of himself." "That's enough Chris! Johnny said loudly. "That's not helping matters at all." He paused briefly. "I take it your decision is to cancel and not try to perform without Justin." Lance spoke up. "That was never an option. We're not performing without Justin." Johnny exhaled deeply. "Ok then, I need to make some phone calls. You guys need to wrap it up and head back to the hotel." "I think I need to talk to Wade," you said calmly. "Chris, Lonnie just called me and said he got Justin back to the hotel. Do you think Danni would mind checking on him? I think she'd have better luck with him right now than any of us would." "Sure Gary, no problem. We'll leave right now. JC, you and Lance mind sticking around and waiting for Gary?" "No, we can grab a shower while he's talking to Wade." You appreciated that they were staying. You felt very much in control now, but were uncertain how you would feel after your discussion with Wade. You walked back in just as Mark was putting a bandage on the stitches above Wade's left eye. Already it was nearly swollen shut and the blood soaked towel indicated that the cut was fairly deep. Wade's face showed no emotion nor did he look your way as you entered. "Mark, can you excuse us for a few minutes please?" Mark's face showed concern. "Can you guarantee me I won't be back in here in five minutes having to stitch one of you up? "You have my word." "Wade, what about you?" he asked. "If you recall, I'm not the one that threw the first punch." "I'll take that as a 'yes' Wade." Disgusted, Mark left the room. Trying to remain calm, you turned to Wade. "Wade, what is it with you and Justin? He works his butt off and the guys tell me you ride him constantly." "He slacks off. He has so much potential and he's not using it. He's one of the most talented natural dancers I've ever seen. I only pushed Justin so hard because I can see what he's capable of. He could be the perfect dancer. The fact that I really like Justin only makes me want push him harder." You were hoping you were hearing him wrong. "Back up a minute, define 'like'. His face was still void of emotion. "Gary, I'll be honest with you if that's what you want, but you may not want to hear what I have to say." You could feel your chest pounding, but you needed to hear him out. "If it helps me to understand what the hell is going on, then I need to hear it." Wade stared directly into your eyes without wavering. "I have feelings for him, Gary. I have for a long time. I was 14 when I saw the Disney concert. From that point on I have worked my ass of for an opportunity to work with him. I knew when I did the VMAs that I had a shot at this job. The guys thought I had some good dance moves and Darren put in a good word for me. I would have worked this gig for free. Anything to be close to him. For one of the first times you could remember, you had no response. Your emotions ran wild. Were you angry, hurt, scared or just confused? Everything was unclear. All you knew is that you had to get out of that room. You turned and left never saying anything to Wade and never hearing him quietly say. "You're gonna loose him, Gary." You also never saw the one tear slowly roll down his cheek. TBC......Comments to Dannibailey@hotmail.com