Date: Sat, 09 Feb 2002 00:20:22 +0000 From: Kevin K Subject: Encountering Nick - Chapter Six Obligatory warnings and disclaimers: 1) If reading this is in any way illegal where you are or at your age, or you don't want to read about male/male relationships, go away. You shouldn't be here. 2) I don't know any of the celebrities in this story, and this story in no way is meant to imply anything about their sexualities, personalities, or anything else. This is a work of pure fiction. Questions and commentary can be sent to "kdawg96@hotmail.com". Thanks again to all who have written. I love hearing what it is you have to say. For other great reads, check out theses incredible stories as well: 'Nick and Ashley' and 'JC's Hitchhiker'. I recommend you check them out! Also check out Dream Slash, at http://www.envy.nu/dreamslash/, who has kindly offered to co-host this story, along with many other favorites. Thanks Dream Slash! School has started again for me, so chapters wont be posted a regularly as the have formerly. I said before maybe two or three a week, but I realized unfortunately that is practically impossible. So I will only be posting one a week, because that is all I can handle. Hang in there guys! Now lets get back to what you came here for. *** Encountering Nick - Chapter Six My eyes widened and my heart dropped. I felt so dizzy, almost like I was about to faint. I felt the blood draining from my face and I'm sure I was as white as a ghost. 'This couldn't be happening!' I felt my throat closing. I couldn't breath. I needed to get out of here. I needed to leave now! I ran immediately out of the gymnasium and directly out of the hotel. I didn't stop running once I was outside. Everyone was just looking at me, probably questioning 'what the hell is his problem'. Well life's my problem! No matter what I do or where I go, I can't escape the fact that my life is destined to be miserable. I kept running into people that were in my way. Occasionally, someone who yell 'Watch were you're going asshole!' or something along those lines, but all that did was upset me even more. I was sprinting now and I just couldn't stop. After about ten minutes of continuous running, I collapsed in the middle of a public park. Gasping for air, I plummeted myself onto a bench, and just began to bawl. I just cried and cried. My eyes were burning and most likely blood shot. Eventually, when the crying subsided, I tried to figure out what the hell was going on. Jack was now back in my life, and I'm sure he's going to try get me fired again. He'll try wrecking my relationship with Nick, or worse, finding a way to get not only Nick, but also everybody to hate me. It's hard to believe that there was a time when he wasn't such the horrible person he is now. It was when I was eighteen and had first gotten the job to dance with Britney. I was still coming to terms with my sexuality, and I hadn't come out to anyone yet. I had remained in a depression from the time when my parents had died until a year into my dancing career with Britney. When I joined the group, I was very quiet at first and usually kept to myself. Jack had also joined the group at the same time, and he was also a little shy himself. So the two us of kind of bonded at the beginning since we were the 'new guys'. Jack was sincerely kind and sympathetic to me, because he knew that I was in depression. He just assumed it was because of my parents' death four years prior, which it partly was. But I had known for quite a while then that I was not attracted to women, but to men instead. I had told Jack everything about my life, except about my sexuality. After about a year with Britney and the group, I had become close with everyone, especially Britney and Jack. I was still in depression, but the two of them were always so great to me. They were my two best friends in the whole world at that point. Jack and I would always room together when staying at hotels, and would tell each other everything. Jack would always tell me about all of the girls he'd fucked while we passed through different cities during touring. But I still hadn't gathered the courage to come out to him yet. I was nineteen then, and wanted to tell Jack more than anything. I had secretly been attracted to him, and believed that I was in love with him. More than anything, I wanted him to love me. Sometimes, I would get my own suspicions about Jack, thinking that maybe there's a chance that he was gay himself. He did always talk about women, but I was beginning to think it was a form of refutation. I did the same thing when I was in denial too. I could swear that sometimes we would flirt with each other, and kind of be 'touchy feely'. My hand would brush against his very often. We'd sit and watching television, and our knees would touch. Things like that. They were very small, insignificant things, but they did add to my suspicions. But I figured then that I was nineteen years old and it's about time I begin to live my life. And the first thing I was going to do was come out of the closet. I was going to come out to Jack and tell him how I feel. I remember when I told him. It was after a concert one night. We went back up to my room and he was discussing about going out to find some chic to sleep with. I told him I needed to talk to him first, and he was more than happy to do that. We sat down, and I began to tell him that there was more to my depression than he or Britney realized. I told him it was something that has been eating me up since soon after my parents had been killed and that I had almost taken my own life because I couldn't deal with these two issues any longer. When saying all of this I remember seeing the concern in his face deepen as my story went on. He felt really bad for me then and didn't want to see me hurting anymore. I continued to tell him that what had been bothering me was something I could never change, no matter how much I wanted to. I told him that it's a part of me that I had only just come to accept and I hope that he'd be able to accept it too. Now his face was full of concern and confusion. >From then on, I remember exactly what the both of us said. After noticing his confusion I went on to say, "You see Jack, what I'm trying to say is very difficult. So I'm just going to come out and say it." Jack comforted me by saying, "Just tell me Geoff. Whatever it is, we'll deal with it together. I'm your best friend, remember?" "Yes I know. OK, well you see... I'm Gay," I paused for a second and then continued, "and I'm in love with you." I remember the concern, confusion and comfort on his face immediately changed to anger, hate and hostility. "What the fuck!" Jack yelled, "My best friend's a fuckin' fag!? You're a fuckin' cock sucker!? I could never be in love with a queer like you!" I was in shock. I remember I wanted to cry, but I had kept it inside of me. "I thought I could tell you anything and you would be here for me?" I pleaded. The one man I loved had broken my heart. How could he hate me when I had loved him so much? But I could quickly feel that love transform into hate. "Get out my room you faggot!" he screamed at me. I remember I ran straight out of his room, similar to how I ran out of the hotel just now. I had no place to go though. My best friend had just turned his back on me and broke my heart. I felt so alone and I honestly did not want to live any longer. As I was running down the hallway, just about to get into an elevator, Britney had stepped out of her room. She noticed I was upset right away and ran directly over to me. I remember that conversation clearly as well. "Geoff! Oh my god are you alright!?" "Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." I said coldly. But tears were welling up in my eyes and she was able to read right through me. "Like I'm going to buy that Geoffrey!" she said sarcastically, "Now come with me!" She pulled me into her room, which was only about twenty feet away. We sat down on her bed and with her hand she wiped the tears away from my eyes, which was now gushing with tears. We sat silent for about a minute until she took my hands in hers and looked me in the eyes. "Geoff, you know I love you and you can trust me," she said so seriously. It was the most seriousness I have ever heard Britney use in the four years I've known her. "I know I can Brit." I said "Alright good. Now spill!" she demanded. But I remember no words would come out, only tears. I began bawling and Brit pulled me into a hug and allowed me to cry on shoulder. "Geoff, please tell me. Please?" she pleaded. She pulled me off of her and grabbed my shoulders so I was looking into her eyes again. "Please Geoff?" We were silent for about thirty second and then I finally said, "I'm Gay." Silence filled the room. That dreaded silence that makes your heart stop and stabs you in the gut. Not more than ten minutes before that I had come out to the man I thought I loved and he pulled my heart out of me and shattered it into a million pieces. I was convinced Brit would do something similar or worse. But she didn't. She smiled and pulled me into a hug. "That's so great." She said, "I'm so happy for you." "Jack wasn't," I said wretchedly. She broke the hug and looked at me very concerned. "What happened Geoff?" she asked me. "I loved him. Well I though I did anyway," I said as tears began to flow once again, "I loved him, told him everything, and he rejected me. He threw me out like trash. He called me a faggot and said he'd never have a queer as a best friend!" "He's an asshole!" she said callously, "He was never your friend if he can't accept who you really are. Forget about him. He's beneath you Geoff." We ended up talking the whole night and she was nothing but the greatest friend in the world. That night our friendship grew so much stronger and has remained that way ever since. Although Jack did tell everyone the next day, they didn't care. Britney was there to support me, and everyone else did too. Except for Jack. His hatred for me grew everyday, as mine did for him. And numerous times he tried to get me in trouble and get me fired, until he succeeded two weeks ago. I thought he was out of my life for good. I thought I would be able to live a happy and loving life for once. I guess I was wrong. He's back, and there's nothing I can do about it. They can't fire him unless they have reason to. He would be able to sue for 'wrongful termination'. Damn these workplace laws! I noticed that it was beginning to get dark, and really cold out too. I wasn't wearing a jacket because we were in LA, but I had no idea how to get home and was afraid I'd get sick if I stayed out any longer. I had no idea how long it had been since I rushed out of the hotel, but I knew it had to have been a few hours at the least. 'Why hadn't anyone called yet? Don't they care about me? Had Jack gotten to them already?' I pulled my cell out of my pocket and noticed it was off. No wonder I hadn't received any calls. I turned it on and noticed I had five messages. So I checked them. Three were from Nick, who had obviously been informed about the situation by Andrew and the dancers. He sounded so concerned, almost frantic, and said to call him right away in every message. The other message was from TJ, who was worried about me too. The last message was from Britney. I know Nick wanted me to call, but I needed to speak to Britney urgently. She knew Jack and I thought she could help more than anyone right now. So I called her and no one picked up. I had gotten her machine once again. Then I heard the familiar message I had heard many times before, "Hey, it's Britney! I'm not in, but leave a message and I'll call ya back soon!" "Brit, It's Geoff. I don't know what to do! Jack's back! He's going to ruin my life again! Help me! Please!" I hung up. I was getting worked up again. I had to calm down. But then I realized that Nick was probably more worked up than I was right now. He had no idea where I was. But did I? 'Where was I anyways?' I dialed Nick's cell and he picked up after one ring. "Geoff!?" he answered apprehensively. "Nick!" I said, overjoyed to hear his voice. "Where are you? I heard what happened. Are you okay?" he asked worriedly. "No I'm not okay, but we can talk about that later. 'Cause right now I don't know where the hell I am." I told him. I ended up walking while talking to Nick on the cell until I came across a phone booth with the address in it. I told the address to Nick who within a couple minutes pulled up next to me in a limo. I didn't realize it until now but he'd been searching for me since soon after I bolted from rehearsal. He had been so worried about me, and I knew that he really did care for me. He really did love me. Soon we were back at the hotel, and heading back to our room. When we got there Brian, Leanne, Kevin, Kristen, Howie, AJ, Jenny and TJ were waiting for us. They were also very worried about me. 'I wonder if anyone said anything to Jack?' I had cried so much in the past few hours that I barely had anymore strength left in me. I was so tired and extremely exhausted. After everyone had made sure I was all right, Nick asked them to clear out so I could get some rest. They all wanted to know how I felt and what I was going to do, but I told them I wasn't ready to talk about it right now. Hopefully I will be able to tomorrow. But I couldn't answer them because I didn't know the answer myself. Nick took me over to the bed and laid me down. He pulled the sheets over me and tucked me in, just like my parents used to do to me when I was little boy. He kissed me on the forehead and then came to lie down next to me. I knew he wouldn't be able to sleep yet because it was still quite early, only just after 9:00pm. He cuddled up beside me, though, putting his arms around me and within minutes I was out like a log. I awoke the next morning to find Nick already out of bed. He was sitting on a chair, near my side of the bed, just watching me. I looked up at him and smiled, and he smiled his heavenly grin back at me. He got up and came over to the bed. He lay down on top of me and planted his lips on mine. His lips were so soft, and so gentle. His tongue slipped into my mouth and wrestled with mine. Nick was a big tongue man, and slipped it to me whenever we'd kiss. I slid my hands down his back and began to squeeze his tight ass. I loved his butt. It was so firm and perfect. I loved touching it, and he loved it too. But our fun got interrupted with knock at the door. "You expecting anyone?" I asked. "Brian said earlier that he might stop by later this morning. That's probably him." Nick said, still lying on top of me. "Oh, Okay." I said, and the yelled to the door, "Come in!" "Hey!" our visitor said as they stepped through the door. "Uh hi," Nick said politely as he got off from on top of me. I guess he was confused why this person was here. But so was I. I was just as confused as Nick was. "Brit, what are you doing here?" *** End of Chapter Six That's all for now. Please e-mail me with all questions and comments at kdawg96@hotmail.com - and I'm always open to new and fresh ideas. I look forward to hearing from all of you. Check back next week for Chapter Seven!