Date: Tue, 6 Mar 2001 14:20:36 -0500 From: Kathrine Subject: For You, chapter eight Legal disclaimer: not true. All fiction, written by me. Don't read if you're not old enoigh, or if this is in any way prohibited material for you. Author's notes: sorry that this took so long. Guess I've spent too much time over in NSYNC-land...not that I'm complaining. ;) Anyways, here's more. Love and looneytunes from Kat! http://www.angelfire.com/boybands/KathFiction/Main.html - For You, chapter eight - Nick felt his breath nearly get caught in his throat. "I..." he started, the question had taken him by surprise. "I don't think I should answer that without Kevin here too," he finally whispered, suddenly realising that he had already given her the answer. "Please don't be mad," Nick pleaded silently. "Please don't go telling me that it's a sin loving him, that I'm a bad person for it." She was silent too. "I think I already knew, Nick," she said in the end. "I just haven't had the nerve to ask any of you...and now... Oh God, Nick, this must be hell for you." "It is," Nick couldn't manage more than another whisper, tears already burning at his eyes. "I miss him so much, it's driving crazy not knowing where Kevin is, if he's ok, if I'll ever se him again..." Again the tears were flowing freely down Nick's face. "How long has the two of you been..." Nick had to smile a little as he heard Mrs. Richardson not quite know how to end her sentence. "Boyfriends?" he offered mildly. "For about three months. But I have been in love with Kevin forever." There. He had said it. It had to be strange for her to hear it so bluntly, under this of all circumstances. Surprised Nick heard Kevin's mother laugh softly. "I guess Kevin must have felt the same way then? Did he tell you, or was you the one?" "It was me," Nick answered, remembering back. "One night I asked if I could talk to him in private, and then I told him. Well, I don't think I was in any shape to form actual, meaningful sentences at that time, so I just told Kev that I loved him. Then he said he loved me, and we kissed. That was pretty much the whole of it, but it was the happiest moment in all of my life." "Brian told me that you found his car," Mrs. Richardson said carefully. "You knew something was wrong?" "I couldn't reach him over the phone," Nick explained, thinking back to the moment where he had first seen Kevin's jeep, crashed into a tree. "And there were just something telling me that I needed to find him, that something bad was happening." Again Nick felt the painful streaks of guilt. If he had did what he wanted to, and made Kevin stay with him, none of this would have happened. Then Kevin would be safe and he would be the one on the phone with his mother now, talking about his sister-in-law and the baby... And Nick would be the happiest man alive just laying in Kevin's arms, head against his chest, feeling every breath he took. "Nick?" Mrs. Richardson asked. "You got so quiet." "Sorry," Nick said again. The next words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. "It was my fault." "Your fault?" Nick could hear the shock in her voice. "Nick, how can this be your fault?" "Because I was there," Nick answered, twisting the phone cord nervously between his fingers. "If I had made Kevin stay with me, he wouldn't have gotten back in the car, he wouldn't have been gone now. Kevin would have been safe, and with me..." His voice trailed off. "Oh honey," mrs. Richardson hurried to say. "Nick, you didn't know this would happen! Please don't blame yourself for this..." "When I get him back, I am never letting him out of my sight again," Nick promised, pushing away the small, nagging doubt that said he might not see his boyfriend again at all. ***** "What are you thinking about, babe?" AJ asked as Howie seemed to be far away in thoughts. Before Howie answered he leaned over and wrapped his arms around AJ. "I was just trying to imaging what I would feel if I were in Nick's place. God, I don't think I'd manage to keep it together at all." "Me neither," AJ admitted, snuggling up in Howie's arms, "if it was you that was gone. But I guess you never know before you're right in the middle of it... Look at Nick, he must be dying on the inside, but he keeps going... This is going to sound like a total cliche, but I never knew how strong he is." "He has to be strong," Howie replied. "And so do we. Hopefully all this will be over soon. Whoever took Kevin, has to have left some kind a clue behind. We just need to figure out what." AJ was quiet for a second. "I say we go with the letters for the moment. They have to be from someone able to get close to us, you know? Since there were no adress or postmark. Or from someone who knows someone that can get close to us." "Don't forget that this guy was actually in Kevin's car. Even in he didn't get in there before after they stopped for a walk on the beach, he must have followed them from the studio. Which means that this was planned...he knew exactly what he was doing." "I know," AJ sighed. "Come on, let's go back to the mail. Sitting still like this is driving me crazy." "Alex, you're already crazy," his boyfriend told him. "But yeah, we need something to do, instead of just sitting around here, worrying." "If I am crazy, than you're crazy," AJ answered, pulling Howie's hair. "For being with me." Howie smiled and planted a quick kiss on AJ's forehead. "If it's one thing I am sure of, AJ, is that I am not crazy for being with you. I love you." AJ smiled back. "Love you too, D." ***** Letting her suitcases and bags fall down to the floor, in the guestroom she would be staying in, Ingrid turned to Brian. "Don't even say a word!" she warned him. Brian looked from her, to the luggage, back to her again. "Wasn't going to. Was that all?" Not sure if he was teasing or not, Ingrid simply nodded. "Yeah, that was it. Now, should we go to the store right away, and then head back to Kevin's place?? Following her down the stairs again and back out to the car, Brian agreed. "Nick's going to want to stay there and two of us, either Howie and AJ or you and me, should be there with him, at all times. The police knows we're staying there, and they have the phone number and all, should anything come up... Thanks for staying with me." "No problem," Ingrid answered, with a small smile. "You should only know how many times I've daydreamed about something like this... Ahm...I didn't say that out loud, did I?" The large grin on Brian's face was all the answer she needed. Blushing, she added: "Definetely something that I know was supposed to stay inside my head... But anyway. Thanks for letting me stay. And for trusting me like this." Brian started the car. "It's funny, you know. I only met you a little while ago, but I feel like I have known you for years. Off we go then, let's go raid the convenience store." "As long as you all will let me do the cooking," Ingrid stated. "Don't think I didn't see all the empty take-out cartons in your kitchen." "Honey, that place is like NASA light!" Brian told her. "I'm afraid of it, most of the time. Except of the fridge and the microwave oven." Turning onto the freeway, he reached into the glovecompartement and pulled out a pair of sunglasses. "But you can cook all you like, Howie will be happy to help. As far as the rest of us goes, we're gastronomically challenged. Which means we'll either burn anything to a crisp, or it will turn out as something yet unknown to the human kind." "Yeah," Ingrid nodded. "I think I'll do the cooking." "Yeah," Brian nodded too. "That's probably for the best." TBC...