Date: Fri, 02 Jul 1999 22:40:50 EDT From: Christian Williamson Subject: Forbidden Love: Brian and Crist, Chapt II Forbidden Love: The Story of Brian and Christian, Chapter 2 Well here's the second installment, of what will be a very long series. I was asked specifically how long this series is going to be, and I had to honestly say I didn't know. At the rate I'm going now, this series will be out for a long, long time. I'd like to acknowledge of couple of series that I like, if they have proper names, I'm sorry for not using them, but this is how I remember them... "B-Rok's 10,0000 Promises" [My all time favorite, Chris, keep 'em coming], "Bad boy B-rok" [second Favorite, once again a great story], "Brian and Justin", "Brian and Cody", "The One", and I'm sure there are a lot out there that I'm missing... Sorry... I'm looking for very knowledgeable people on Manhattan and the Bible. I need someone very familiar with Manhattan because well, duh, the story takes place there, and all though I have been in Manhattan, it was only for a limited time. And I need to talk with someone who's done research into Christianity and Homosexuality, I have some of my own questions, and I'd like to be a little better informed when I deal with it in this story. Two more things... I want to have a little group of people proofread my stories from now on, so if you're interested, email me at brianandcrist@hotmail.com You'll get to read the chapters a few days before I post them to the archive if you want to do it. A big Thanks goes out to all the people that emailed me, I was greatly surprised by all the kind words, and encouragement. I like to hear what people think about the story, good or bad. So if you want to send something over, you can do so by emailing me at . And if you want to take a look at the website, you can do that also at Legal stuff: This story is fictional. Any similarity to real life is purely coincidental. If you are offended by material that contains a homosexual theme, do not read any further. If you live in an area where homosexual literature is illegal to possess, or you are under 18, do not read this story. If you do, you're continuing at your own risk. Well without further interruption, here's Chapter II of Forbidden Love: I woke up at about 6:00 A.M. And went out to the kitchen to eat breakfast. I turned on the TV to see my face plastered on all the cable entertainment channels and two of the local channels. I think they were NBC and CBS affiliates, but I'm not sure. From what I saw, they were mostly rehashing some information and playing clips from Rosie, Letterman and Oprah. I decided to have a little bit of fun early in my morning, so I called MTV. "MTV studios, how may I direct your call?" "Heather?" I asked "Crist?" She turned the question on me. "Ya. Hey how ya doin'?" I replied. "Good, good. And you?" "Oh I'm great. A little nervous though." "Well don't be. You'll do wonderfully tonight." She said. Heather was always so positive. "Did you get tickets?" I hoped she did. "You bet." "I'll be looking for you then." I laughed. "Well my tickets are pretty good, second row, dead center." She boasted. "Holy shit!" I was surprised she got those good of seats. "MTV paid for them. I don't know why though. They'll probably tell me I have to do a story on it, 5 minutes before the show starts." She joked. "Well if you do, come and see me afterwards in my dressing room. I'll give you an _exclusive_ interview." I said saying it like I was a big shot. "That'd be wonderful. I may request to do a story on you now. Hey what can I do for you?" "I was wandering if I could talk to somebody on the air right now. You know, give a little promo for it." "Let me see what we can do." She put me on hold for two minutes. "Crist?" You still there?" "Ya, I'm here." "Okay, in 5 minutes, they'll put you on with John Norris." She said. "Cool. I didn't think I could pull that off." I told her, very surprised. "Well now that you're famous, and not a little guy pestering the execs to play you're video, you get special treatment." She giggled. "Well, well. I'll have to make sure to take advantage of this special treatment." "Seriously though. I was told to tell you that if you want to get on any of our shows, just call." She was serious. "Good deal." "Hey, I'm going to transfer you over to the studio now." "Okay. It was nice talking with you again, Heather." "Ya, it was nice talking with you tool. Hold on." The phone clicked. "Hello?" I heard a voice on the other end ask. "Ya?" I answered. "This is John." "Oh hi John. We're not on are we?" I asked. "No. In about a minute." "Okay, so how's this going to work?" "We're going to cut into the videos to do this. I'll introduce you and then say 'Crist, you there?' then it'll start." John told me rather quickly. "Alright." "30 seconds." John said flatly. ~~~ Brian woke up at 6:00, too. He was feeling a little better, but still wasn't quite himself. He ordered up room service for breakfast. He didn't feel like facing the other guys yet because he had been rather mean and cold to them over the weekend. He had to think up an apology before he could confront them. He flicked on the TV and turned it to ESPN. There was one of those exercise programs on, so he turned it over to MTV. "This is an MTV News update and I'm John Norris. We have Christian Williamson on the phone with us to talk about the premiere of Martin Guerre that will take place later today." John's voice came over the TV set. Brian perked right up. "Crist, you there?" "Yep. I'm here." I said confidently. 'God even his voice sounds sexy.' Brian thought out loud. "Welcome to MTV News. How are you doing?" John asked. "I'm very good thank you." "So are you excited about tonight?" "Oh yes. We've perfected this play so much that it should be better than the premier in London. Ever since it's gotten a lot, and I do mean _a lot_ of publicity, the directors and producers have been working extra hard so that it's perfect." "Great. I hope it goes well. Have you seen a list of who will be there yet?" He asked me. "I'll be there." Brian said anxiously as if I'd be able to hear him. "Not yet, but I heard it was packed with celebrities." "You could say that. I've seen a list, but the theatre company has not released anything official and asked to keep what we knew secret. I can tell you though, that anybody who loves seeing a ton of celebrities will not be disappointed." John said addressing the camera. "Oh great, add more pressure on my shoulders." I joked. "You'll do great." John told me assuringly. "I guess congratulations are in order for 'What you are' making number one this week." I heard a little cheer from the camera crew. "Thanks. I'm really excited about it. I just hope I don't fall as fast as I came up. I said. "You won't, I think you'll be around for a while." "Well thanks. The next song we will be releasing off my album has a very different feel to it than this one. That way we don't bore the fans. Then about 4 other songs will be released, all at times when we feel are appropriate. We want to keep the fans interested, so all the songs are different, yet they all have that one tie: Me. Hopefully it'll work, but then you never know, I may be yesterday's news in a couple of weeks." "Well I'm glad this success hasn't gone to your head. Lot's of the artists that rise of fast get very cocky in a short amount of time." "I was brought up in a house where we were taught to be humble, and it's just stuck with me I guess. I really don't like to say that I'm going to make it far because I personally think it sounds arrogant. I take things day by day, always planning for the worse, but hoping for the best." "That's the only way to go." He said. "So how does your girlfriend feel about all of this?" 'Why do they always have to bring up her?' I asked myself. "Why do they always have to bring her up?" Brian asked out lout echoing my same exact thoughts. "Oh she's great about it. I knew her before my career took off and she hasn't changed a bit." Which was true. "Will she be at the premiere?" John asked. "Actually no. She was called out of town yesterday." I replied trying not to let my happiness show though in my voice. Brian definitely liked that news. 'Oh this is going to work out great. I won't have to contend with her tonight." He thought to himself. 'Ya know, he sounds kind of happy that she won't be there.' "That's a shame." John shook his head. "When will she get to see it?" "I'm not sure. I haven't talked to her since she left." I answered. "Oh really?"He seemed surprised. "She left on really short notice and forgot her cell phone. She didn't know where she'd be staying, so I don't have a number to call her and she hasn't call me, so..." "Hmm... She'll probably call soon then. Well it was nice talking to you." He was signaling to me that the interview was over. "Oh it was nice talking to you too." "Thanks. Good luck tonight." He said. "Thank you. Bye." "Bye." I heard him say, and then a click came across the phone, so I hung up. Brian felt better knowing my girlfriend wasn't going to be there. He shut the TV off and fell back asleep thinking about what he'd say to me later that night. ~~~ "Cass is going is to be happy about that." I said out loud, referring to the MTV phone conversation. Right then the phone rang. I picked it up. "Hello?" "Hey nice job. You get that set up yourself?" It was Cass. "Yepper. I didn't have anything better to do. So are you going to come to see us warm up today?" I asked her. "Ya. I'll be there. I wouldn't miss it. What time should I be there?" "Well I'm going to the theatre at ten. We start at 10:30, then at 12:00 we break for lunch. After that from one till six, they're going to work with us on preparing and relaxing our voices. Very tedious." I told her. "Okay. I'll be there but I have to leave at two I'll get back at around four thirty to five. I have to run some errands." "That's fine. Just make sure to be there early enough to talk to some of the guys from the major labels." "I know. That's what you're paying me for, or did you forget?" She asked sarcastically. "Ah... That's why. I was staring to wonder why I had to give you money." I kept up the little joke. "Now you know. Well I have to go. Don't answer your phone, unless you know who is on the caller ID" she was serious. "Will do. See ya." "Bye." I hung up the phone and finished eating breakfast. It was about 6:45. I had about three hours till I had to be there, so I ran on the tread mill for half an hour and then worked out in my little personal gym until 9:00. I listened to my cd's instead of the radio, because I was already sick of myself. I hopped in the shower, got ready, then left for the theatre at 9:40. It took about 20 minutes to get there, so I was right on time. I went in and gabbed with everyone till 10:30, when we started to practice. They (directors) went pretty easy on un. Probably because a lot of the people, including myself had never performed in front of any audience this size and with so many famous people in it. From what I could tell, no one was nervous, anxious, or nauseous. The practice was enjoyable, actually. I saw Cass come in at about 11:00. I waved and she waved back really excitedly. I made a couple of mistakes during practice, which she laughed at. I think everyone was wishing she'd go cause when she laughed, I started to laugh too and screw everything up. I was having fun though, so I didn't care what they thought. The directors let us out at 12:00 for lunch. We got a list of things we couldn't eat or drink. I'd swear my whole diet was on that list. Cass and I left for a little coffee shop and when we got there it was full. Luckily, no one noticed who I was, except the owner, Jim, who saw me walk in. He came over and took me and Cass to an open table. We thanked him and gave our order. He came back with the food in five minutes. He was apparently trying to get on my good side. "Is that all?" He asked. "Ya, thanks." I said. He walked away and I leaned over to Cass. "That was weird. If there wasn't a bar and these seats were a little comfier, I'd swear we were in a real restaurant." She giggled and then changed the subject. "So you nervous _yet?_" She had seen that I was pretty calm the whole day. "Nope. Well not at least till I see a list of who's going to the there tonight." I said suggestingly. I knew that she knew who would be there. I was trying to get her to tell me. "I'm not saying a word. I will tell you that there's going to be a ton of movie stars, even more music artists, and a lot of music execs. But I don't want to get you nervous." She was being stubborn on purpose and had the biggest grin on her face. "Cass I hate you!" I said jokingly, throwing a roll at her... "Hey! Come on. You know if I told you, you'd get super nervous." "No I wouldn't." I said defiantly. "Wait. Someone really super cute is going to be there?" I was prying. "There's going to be lots of good-looking people there." She blocked me again. "Come on, please." I begged. "Huh-uh. You'll find out tonight." I let out a little grunt. "Okay, I'll just have to find out from someone else." "You won't." "And why's that?" I asked raising my brow. "Because I've gone to great lengths to keep it secret. Trust me, you won't get the list." God if she said I wasn't going to get something, then I wasn't going to get it. She was always able to get or do what she wanted. "Okay. Okay... I give up." "Good. Now tonight try to avoid looking in the audience. If you see someone and loose your concentration, the whole experience could be ruined." She said getting serious. "Ya I know, James told me that." James was one of the directors. He dealt with the choreography and physical parts of it. "What are you doing afterwards?" She asked. "Well, I guess right after the show I'm going to talk with as many people I can." "I know that, but I mean do you have any plans for tonight?" "I promised this girl I know, Heather, I'd give her a little interview. Then after that, I don't know. Why? You want to do something?" I was curious as to why she was asking me. "I can't, I'm going on a date." She grinned. "You're so lucky you can go out with somebody." "You and Jes can go out." She said eating her fries. "That's not what I mean, and you know it. I don't want to go out with a girl, I want a guy. Someone who I really care about." She knew I was gay, and had a little crush on Brian, so I didn't have to hide anything around her. "Honey, you know that's not possible and speaking of being gay, don't talk about Brian like you did on Rosie, like that again. I received several angry calls from the Jive, Zomba, and the Firm, almost everybody." I perked right up at that, not even realizing that it was bad. "You talked with their management? That's awesome." "Did you miss something? I said I got _angry_ calls. Not nice ones." "Well you had contact with them. That's more than me." "Are you still obsessing over Brian?" She asked me sarcastically. "Actually I haven't seen any pictures of him since the morning of the Oprah interview. It's hard for me to remember what he exactly looks like. I've had so much stuff going on lately, that I haven't had anytime to refresh my memory of his face." "Ya, right. Well that's probably a good thing." She knew that he was going to be there, and that if I recognized him, I might loose my concentration. We finished our lunch, not talking about much after that cause we had to get back to the theatre. We arrived there, and I was rushed back on stage. ~~~ At around 1:00, Kevin came in to wake Brian up. He turned on the lights and went over to the bed and shook Brian. "Hey, Bri. Wake up." "What time is it?" Brian asked very groggily. "It's one in the afternoon. We have to go to the studio for a couple of hours." "Oh ya, I forgot about that." Brian yawned. "Well you have half an hour to get ready." Kevin announced as he started for the door. "Come down to my room when you're done." He walked out and closed the door. Brian started humming to get his voice ready because he knew he'd be the one singing today. He got up and went into the bathroom. There was a big mirror on the wall that was as tall as he was. He took off his shirt and boxers and stood there naked in front of the mirror. "I still have it." He told himself, flexing his tight muscles. He had been down on himself all weekend, and needed positive reinforcement. "I just hope he thinks I have it too." With that he turned around and started the shower. He made sure it was the right temp and got in. When he was done washing, he stepped out and almost fell, but luckily he didn't get hurt. He picked out picked out a Nike wind suit with a wife beater and put them on. He went down to Kevin's room and they were all waiting for him. As fast as he got in the room, he was out of it. They all went down stairs and hopped in the limo. "You excited about tonight?" Howie asked Brian , trying to stir up some conversation. "Ya. I can't wait." Brian proclaimed looking directly at Kevin. Kevin shook his head disappointed at Brian, and said "Whatever. It's your choice." No one else knew what was up between them, and the looks on their face reflected that. Nick knowing it probably had to do with something that shouldn't be asked about, avoided the subject by asking what time they were going to be done. "Hey, does anybody know what time we'll get out of the studio today?" "Four." AJ replied without much expression. "Wow! That's early." Nick was surprised. "Well Brian has to be at the theatre by 6:30 and it's going to take 20 minutes to get there, so he has to leave by at least 6:10 and he won't get to the hotel to get ready until 4:30, and knowing Brian that gives him just enough time to get ready." "Cool." Nick bobbed his head. "Well thanks Frick." Brian wasn't even paying attention to what was being said. He was daydreaming about what might happen later that night.... all the possibilities... 'Bri, Hey Brian!" Kevin saw him starring out the window, daydreaming. Brian turned to them. "Huh? What?" "Nothing. You just looked lost a second there." "Oh I was thinking about recording today." He lied. "What were you thinking about it?" Kevin asked in a curious way. "Oh just about how high my part is in some of the songs." Brian knew that answer would satisfy them. "Ya, you're the one who's singing the most today. Hey, we're here." Kevin said getting out. The rest of the guys followed. They went inside and Brian was whisked into the warm up room with a vocal coach. He went through about 15 minutes of exercises, starting with stretching, then vocalizing with high and light falsetto stuff, humming, and open vowel singing. When he was finally finished, he went into the sound booth. The recording was grueling, but he did excellent and at 4:00, the guys left and went to the hotel. ~~~ Cass left at about 2:00 and got back at 4:30. We were all on stage doing a ton of exercises, voice, facial, breathing, stretching and almost every other type of exercise for singing. Cass walked in during the exercise where we were making truck like sounds with our lips flapping together. I just about burst out laughing with her, but I was able to keep it in. 5:30 finally came and all the cast was taken back to makeup and costume. It took about an hour to get everything done. Thalia, my favorite make up artist didn't get to work on me, so I was bummed about that, but everything else went smoothly. The producer came down and told us we had half an hour till start time. All of a sudden, I was totally out of it. That was the way I got before I performed in public. It was almost as if I was high. I never forgot what to do on stage, but I was delirious to everything else. I never recognized anybody and it seemed as if everything was blurry. The president could have came up to mea and I wouldn't have known who it was. I don't know why I got like that, but I did. Maybe it stemmed from an insecurity, maybe about myself, or it could have came from a lack of something. I don't know... Amanda, who played Betrande, the lead female character, saw me staring into space and came over. "Crist. CRIST!" She yelled softly. "What? Oh Mandy, hi" "What's going on?" She asked worried that I didn't look 100% there. "Oh nothing. I just get like this before I... before I perform." I said stumbling over my words. "It isn't going to effect you on stage is it?" "Well, no I mean I'll do fine with you guys." I started flying through my words. "I just won't be able to know, recognize anybody, or be myself again til an hour after the show. I fee so out of it, like I drank 200 cups of coffee. You're lucky I remembered you." "Crist, you're not taking drugs are you?" "What...? Of course not, trust me. I may seem as though I were, but this is how I get. I'm improving though. When I first started to sing, I wasn't able to talk before I went on." "Okay. Just wanted to make sure." She looked relieved. "15 minutes. Come on everybody, it's time to get on stage." The producer yelled, looking a little strained out. ~~~ "Jesus, Brian. It's 6:15 What are you doing???" Kevin shouted pounding on Brian's door. "I know. I'm coming. Just hold on a sec." Brian said coming out of the bathroom, buckling his belt. He grabbed his jacket and opened the door. "Hurry up. The limo's waiting for you." 'Thanks."Brian walked down the hall and got in the elevater. Kevin yelled "Have a good time." before the doors closed. "I will." Brian got downstairs and hopped in the limo. He arrived at the theatre around 6:40. The driver drove up to the red carpet and Brian got out. The bulbs started flashing. He walked to the press canopy and went over to John Norris. He had to go to some reporter, it might have well as been one he liked. "Hi Brian." John greeting Brian, shoving the mic in Brian's face. "Hi." "So where are the other Backstreet Boys?" "They've all got plans for tonight, they couldn't make it." "That's a shame. It's supposed to be really good tonight." "They're all coming to see it tomorrow." Brian responded "Oh good. I'm surprised to see you here, though. I mean considering the things flying around about you." "Well I really love Martin Guerre and Christian Williamson is a great singer. I'm not going to let rumors dictate what I do. It would be silly for me not to go just because he was joking around and the press blew it out of proportion." "Good for you. I'm proud to say though that MTV has never indulged in these rumors. You've got total support from us." "Thanks. That means a lot." Brian replied sincerely. "So, do you have any plans for after the show?" "Not right now, but who knows." Answered Brian. "There are a lot of people here, so I might catch up with some friends or something. I really don't know." "Are you hyped up about the release of your next album, Millennium?" John needed as many sound bytes as he could get, so that's why the subject of the questions changed so quickly. "Very. We're putting finishing touches on it right now and it sounds really good." "You sure are pushing it, don't you think? Brian didn't understand. "Pushing what?" "Well you're just getting really close to the publication date." "We're doing fine actually. It only takes about two or three weeks to make the records themselves, and then only a couple days for distribution. So really we're right on time." "Good. I can't wait till it's out. Well it was nice talking with you." John raised his hand for Brian to shake. "You too. Bye." "Bye." With that, Brian walked in and got his seat. It was only two seats to the left from Heather. She saw him and was quite calm. She'd seen him before and there were many bigger celebs than him there, so she didn't feel uncomfortable with him only being two seats away. ~~~ I was standing off to the side of the stage when the lights dimmed and the curtain rose. I didn't come in for another 20 minutes, but I was in 'the zone'. Oblivious to everything, but the show. This is where I wanted to be, because when I'm in 'the zone,' I don't even realize there's an audience. I was singing at this huge church once and I got like this. I got up and sang as awesomely as I could have, but didn't think about there being a crowd in the seats. I mean I looked at them, but it was as if they weren't there. I don't know how to explain it, but when I get like that, I do my best.I'm in another world when I'm on stage.. My 'zone' has never been broken before by an audience member and I prayed that tonight wouldn't be any different. The curtains closed. Michael, the guy who was playing Martin Guerre, had just finished singing his solo and it was my time to go on. I went and took my place. The curtains rose and he started singing his part. Then my turn came and I sang. We did our lines until he to supposedly died. The curtains closed again. There was a quick scenery change and the curtains rose once more. The crazy kid was singing, I came on and everything went smoothly up until way through the part where Amanda and I did 'All I Know.', The song that we sang on Rose. I was facing the audience when I started singing my lines "All that I've seen, all the battles, all that I've done. Never seeing the truth until that morning and the light of the sun." I turned and looked at Amanda. Everything was still going fine. "And now I'm here with you, learning how it feels to feel scared of the feeling I've found. In all my life this is the first time I've cared. These bloodied hands, their scars of war, have never fought for love before." I turned back to the audience. "And all I know is that all I want to say, I've never said before." Then I took Amanda in my arms. "And all I ask, is you tell me every word you have to say." We stood there for a second staring into each other's eyes, and then we turned to the audience and she started to sing. "All I need is the time to know that this is real and let it grow. And all I see is a man who finds he's brave enough to stay." We turned to each other once again and sang "And all I know is the touch of love that changes all I know." She broke away and went to the side of the stage and sang her lines as if she was in a world of her own, deep in thought. "Is this someone I dreamed in my heart?" Right then, for some reason, I looked down into the audience, my concentration being broken. I didn't do it on purpose it just happened, as if something had told me to do it. I looked down at the center front rows and froze. Right there, were the most gorgeous blue eyes I'd ever seen, cast on me. I stood for a moment, hypnotized. I shook my head to get out of the trance as she finished her second line. "Is this someone I dreamed from the start?" We both sang then to the audience, as though we were vocalizing our thoughts. "And all the pain that I've known turns to dust, blown by the wind. And all I know is that love like this is love that never lies." I took another peek at him, I had to. The front rows were lit enough to see the people in them clearly, so I could to see him without any trouble. He was so gorgeous. Blue eyes, red hair and a jaw line to die for. Luckily, it was a quick glance, and I wasn't able to look into his eyes. I returned to singing, but I knew that I couldn't keep from looking at him again. "All I need is the time to know that this is real and let it grow." ~~~ 'He looked at me! He saw me!' Brian thought to himself, amazed. 'I got his attention. I have to do it again. When he looks down, I'll give him the 'I'm yearning for you' eyes. He won't be able to escape that.' ~~~ The little music section played and I looked back out to the audience, knowing I shouldn't because this was one of the biggest moments of the play, and if I messed it up by looking at him, I was done for. I couldn't stop myself though. He was like a drug, I had to have more. I scanned the first two rows and saw him immediately. A warm feeling flooded my body and I was paralyzed, I couldn't move. He wiped my mind out and gazing into his beautiful eyes I automatically started to sing my lines, which seemed so right to be coming out. "And all I see is that all I've ever loved is in your eyes." He was lipping the words with me, to me. Something was passing between us, an understanding, something magical, something I had never experienced before. "And all I know is the touch of love that changes all I know." The chills started to run up and down in my body. I felt connected and I knew we would be together. It was almost as if some power, subconsciously was telling me that this was right, that this was it, the real deal. I was overwhelmed with happiness and a tear of joy ran down my face. I noticed that he was beginning to cry too. I wish I could have gone down and wipe it away. All of a sudden, the men in the show who played the guards took me away. I fought to get free, much fiercer than I had ever done in past practices. I tried every which way to get loose, but they were big men, and kept me in their hold. They drug me back and when I couldn't see my dream man anymore, I submitted to their force. I felt as though a part of me had been taken away, and I didn't want to struggle anymore. I hung my head and they finished taking me back stage. I was let go, and I almost fell. I felt so weak. I found a stool and sat down, hunched over catching my breath. I began sobbing as the feeling of loneliness took over. Amanda came over, very angry, and before she saw the state I was in, yelled at me. "What the hell was that!?" So shocked by her abruptness, I tried to answer, but all that came out was "I... I..." The look of anger immediately left her, and concerned she asked if I was okay. "Are you alright?" "I think so." was all I could manage to say. Just then, James, that director, snuck up behind me . "My god!" He yelled. I jumped up about a foot, making him and Amanda laugh, and finally me too. "Don't scare me like that." "Sorry." He said still chuckling. "Anyway, that was intense. I've never seen a pair of eyes with such a passion before in my life. Why didn't you ever do that in rehearsal? Did you practice that?" I shook my head no. "Actually someone in the audience made me do that. They caught my eye, and then I... I couldn't break lose" I answered reflecting in my mind, what had just happened. "Well whatever. That was great. I want you to do it like that from now on." He said, patting me on the shoulder. "But look at Amanda instead, next time." he smiled. "Okay." In the play I was supposed to turn to Amanda and we were to sing to each other, but that didn't happen and Jim was actually pretty cool about it. I sat down for a couple minutes and composed myself. ~~~ Brian sat in his chair, panting. "Holy Shit. What was that?' Brian asked himself silently in the same state of shock that I was in. "I don't know if I'll be able to handle that again. But I've got to meet him now. There's no way that I can't. I'm not going to mess this up. It's to perfect." The curtains opened and we were all on stage, in a court room setting. Luckily for me I wasn't facing the audience, because I I were, I knew I'd see him again, and who knows what would have happened then. Throughout the second act, I had to look at the audience, and avoided him every time, but the last. It was only a peep. My character got shot and when Amanda was holding my in her arms as I died, I looked out and saw him balling his eyes out. I wanted to get up and say "I'm okay, really I am" to comfort him, but that was out of the picture. The curtains closed and we were whisked off the stage and then the curtain opened again. I wasn't in any of the end of the play, so I just watched from the side. I tried to see my man in the audience, but from where I was sitting, couldn't. I was too far to the side. The play ended, the curtains dropped, and the audience stood up like lightening, giving the loudest standing ovation I had ever seen. Right at that moment though, Brian got a page. "Shit." He looked to see who was calling, and it was Kevin. "God damn it, Kev. You always get me at bad times." He mumbled to himself as he started to get out of the row. He walked up the main isle on the right and back. The second he got out the door, the curtain rose to reveal the whole cast on stage. We took a bow. I searched for him in the audience. I saw Heather, and then two seats down, there was a gap. He was gone. My heart sank to the bottom of my stomach. I wanted to cry. I couldn't believe he had left. I wanted to see him so badly. I took a big gulp and held the tears back. We took another bow and left the stage. The crowd was still cheering, but I didn't care. I felt so depressed. Jim went on stage with a mic and tapped it a couple times to get everybody's attention. "If I could have your attention please. The cast will be coming out in a second for anybody wishing to talk to them, to do so. They'll be out for approximately the next 15 minutes. I'd like to thank you all for coming and have a safe trip home." I got into the audience first and was swarmed by a crowd of people. Heather somehow managed to be right beside me and I whispered to her "Go back to my dressing room. I'll be back there in 20 minutes." Her face got this gorgeous glow because she didn't think I was serious about the interview. "Okay. Thanks." She said excitedly. "Oh you're welcome." I talked with what seemed a million people in those 15 minutes. No sign of the mystery man or Cass for that matter. I figured she either couldn't get close or was talking to somebody else. I finally got back to my dressing room and both Cass and Heather were there. They saw me come in and Cass came over . "Crist, I don't have any words to describe how wonderful you did." She told me almost crying. "Ya, oh my god Crist. I didn't know you were capable of that, well I didn't know anyone was capable of that. And when you sung that 'All I know' song, you struck a cord deep inside me. I just balled. I mean you had such a passion and flare in your eyes like longing for a love that was so close, but you couldn't have. I just can't describe it well enough to do it any justice. I realized though that I'd never experienced true love like that before. How did you do that to me?" I don't know if she expected a real answer or not. I stood in amazement at how emotional she was getting. I didn't think that the eye lock with my mystery man would have reverberated in the other audience members as it did. The picture of him popped up in my head and I just stood staring into space, thinking about him. "Crist?" Cass asked, breaking my daydream. "Oh sorry. I don't know Heath. I was just doing what I felt at the moment." I said, answering her question. "Crist, I'm going to go, sweetie." Cass interrupted. "Try to get some sleep tonight, okay?" She gave me a hug. "I'll try. Bye." I said waving as she closed the door. "You ready to start the interview?" Heath asked setting up her camcorder. "What interview?" I toyed with her. "You know what interview. Come on." She grabbed my arm and drug me over to the table in the kitchen area. She asked me about how I felt the show went and who I got to meet afterwards and what was next for me and a whole bunch of other questions. I felt kind of bad for her though, because I was only half way through my after stage shock, and I kept thinking about that guy. Therefore I was constantly daydreaming and drifting off. She must have brought me back to Earth at least 20 times, but I don't think she minded cause she didn't seem irritated. She probably had seen people in afterstage shock before and realized what the symptoms were. She moved from her questioning about my career to Jes. "So where's your girlfriend?" The one time I needed to be alert, I wasn't, and the one time I had to give a good, sincere answer, I didn't. "I don't care. I'm going to break up with her soon. Oh shit! I can't believe I just said that. Please don't publish that." I begged, realizing my slip up. "Sure. I won't say anything. You probably didn't mean it anyways." Thank god she was understanding. She was wrong though, I did mean it, but I couldn't break up with Jes, especially after I blabbed about her so much on Oprah. "Thanks. I'm just kind of out of it tonight." I reasoned. "That's what I figured. Well hey. I need to go. It's already 9:50" She got up and started gathering her stuff. "It is getting late." I said looking down at my watch. "I want a glowing review tomorrow." I told her sarcastically. "Don't worry, you'll get it." She gave me a little hug. "See ya." She walked out in the hallway. "Bye." I closed the door and locked it. I went over to the fridge and got a Mountain Dew. I opened it and walked over to the couch to sit down. I had a rather long dressing room, the kitchen part was at one end, then in the middle right beside the fridge, opposite side as the main door was my vanity area with the bathroom door beside it, then moving down to the wall adjacent to that one was a huge tv, which the couch was facing. Well, I went to sit and as soon as my butt hit the cushions there was a knock at the door. "Heather? Is that you?" I asked hoping it was, cause I wouldn't have gotten up, had it been her. "Um... No. It's not Heather." A guy answered with a bit of a southern accent. "Oh..." I tried to think of who it could be, and then it dawned on me. It had to be Jim. "Come on in" I yelled. The door handle jiggled. "Shit." I had to get up cause it was locked. I had forgotten about it being locked. "Hold on one sec." I unlocked the door and I asked "What do you need Jim?" before it was barely open. "Oh, I'm sorr..." I cut off in the middle of "sorry" seeing that it wasn't Jim. It was the guy from the audience. My jaw dropped and the only thing that was running through my head as I stood starring like an idiot was "Oh My God! It's Him!" What happens next? Do they fall in love at first sight? Or do they keep their feelings hidden? Or is this all a dream? Who knows! You'll have to wait and see... The next chapter will be out in about a week and a half. It'll be like really long, so I hope that'll mak e up for the tardiness.... Until next time, tre