CHAPTER 7

The weeks past by and the fear of messing up on stage had all but vanished from Kellen’s mind. He knew he was good and the previous concerts proved it. He sat in his bunk listening to his Discman. The busses drove on through the night on their way to New York. The guys had continuously tried to get him to ride with them on their bus, but Kellen thought it best to stay with the other musicians. Somehow, though, another PA managed to mysteriously appear on the tour taking Kellen’s bunk. Kellen had no choice but to give in to the guys. He had asked them about it and they all chalked it up to needing more PA’s, however, Kellen thought it to be a set-up. It’s not that he didn’t want to ride with the guys, he just didn’t want other people on the tour to think he was moving in and trying to be someone he wasn’t.

The tunes played through the headphones drowning out the gaming session in the lounge. Suddenly the curtains were pulled open and Kellen looked up at JC. “What’s up Jace?” He asked taking the headphones off and setting them aside.

“Well, I’m working on a song for our next album, and I need some guidance. I thought maybe you could lend a hand.”

“Sure” Kellen climbed out of the bunk and followed JC towards the front; away from the shouting coming from the back. They both sat down at the table across from each other. “So, where are you stuck?”

“I’ve got this much but I need help coming up with more lyrics.” JC said looking at the sheet of paper.

“Go ahead and read it to me.” Kellen said closing his eyes and listening to JC read.

Girl when we started baby we were friends
But that's not how this fairy tale is gonna end
See I was thinking then it clicked one day
That no one else has ever made me feel this way
The next time I saw you girl I knew I had to try
To tell you everything that I was feeling deep inside
And listen good cause what I say is from my heart
So if you're ready

You see I toss and turn when I'm alone
And I just cant wait ‘til you get home
Waiting for your call cause tonight we're gonna do it all
Girl it's just the two of us

Kellen opened his eyes when JC finished, “And?”

“And what?”

“That’s all?” He asked JC.

“Yeah, that’s why I asked for your help. I’m having a bad case of writer’s block.”

“I’d say so. Here let’s not think about it for a while and maybe something will come to one of us.” Kellen suggested.

“It’s worth a try.” JC replied. They both started looking around in different directions finding things that had gone unnoticed before. After about a minute, JC looked back at Kellen, “You get the song out of your head yet?”

“No. Have you?”

“No. What about you?” JC asked again not paying attention.

“JC, you already asked me that.”

“Oh, right. I knew that.” He replied.

“Wait! I got it!” Kellen said jumping up out of his seat.

“What?” JC asked looking up suddenly.

“I have some lyrics for the song.” Kellen said triumphantly. He paused.

“Well?”

“Well what?” Kellen asked.

“The lyrics? What are they?” JC asked.

“Oh right, you wanted me to say them aloud.” Kellen said thinking about them.

“Yeah, that would be nice, so I can write them down.”

Kellen took a deep breath and started talking. JC sat there with a pen in hand writing each word as it was said.

Cause I'm thinking about you day and night
And I just can't get you off my mind
When you get a minute baby I was thinking we could hook up
It's just the two of us, the two of us

Cause in a room full of people you're the only one around
And nothing in this world could ever bring us down
Baby I'll be there telling you I care
This I swear
Girl its just the two of us, the two of us

Baby I wonder if you feel the same as I do
I wonder if you're going through the things I'm going through...
I sent you flowers on a Saturday
and inside's a letter with a message and no name
See I just love the feeling, knowing I can make you smile
and I haven't felt that about someone in quite a while
Just listen to these words I have to say
Just take a chance.

He stopped and looked at JC and waited for him to finish reading it. JC suddenly jumped up and grabbed him in a bear hug. “Whoa JC! Put me down.”

“I love it! I love it! Oh Kellen this is going to be such a great song.” JC yelled spinning him around in circles.

“JC you’re going to make me blow chucks all over the…” Kellen didn’t get to finish because the bus slammed on its brakes and he and JC fell to the ground with JC on top. They both started chuckling. “Wow this is an incredibly weird situation.” Kellen said

“Tell me about it.” JC said still on top of Kellen. They both looked at each other and time seemed to just freeze. Both faces closed slowly in on each other until their lips met. They quickly separated. “Wow.” It was all JC could say.

“I think I felt sparks fly.” Kellen said. They were both still on the floor. Laughter could be heard from the back. Kellen and JC kept looking at each other. Their faces inched closer again and then their lips made contact with each other. This time they kissed with a little more force. Kellen could feel JC’s lips, the same lips he’d fell in love with a month earlier. Then Kellen felt the tip of JC’s tongue. He opened his mouth and allowed JC’s tongue to enter in. They both moaned with pleasure; neither one wanting to break apart from the other.

“Holy Fuck!”

The pair quickly separated and looked over at four faces walking out of the lounge. “Oh shit.” Both stammered before trying to get up.

“What the hell is going on in here?” Chris yelled. He quickly shut up though when the driver opened the door separating the driver’s area in the front from the rest of the bus.

“Is everyone ok?” He asked. “Sorry about the sudden stop, but their was a deer crossing the road. Is anyone hurt?”

“No Gary. No one was hurt. Can we continue the trip now?” Chris said.

“You’re sure?”

“I’m, sure. No one is hurt.” Chris watched the bus driver walk back through the door shutting it as he went. “No one is hurt, yet.” Chris finished. “Now, what the heck is going on in here? What the heck was that?”

“Uh…um…uh” Both JC and Kellen managed to stammer.

“Okay, group meeting in the lounge now.” Lance commanded turning around and heading to the lounge. Everyone followed him in. “Come on guys.” Lance said motioning Kellen and JC to the lounge. As JC entered, he felt Lance gave him a pat on the back. He turned around and looked at Lance. Lance just gave him a slight smile that told JC he was okay with the situation and would support them.

Joey, Justin and Chris all sat on the same couch. Lance sat in a small chair and JC and Kellen stood by the door ready to make a run for it if necessary. The designers had made a mistake of putting the lock on the out side of the lounge; however, it would be an advantage if they had to lock the guys in there.

“Hold on. Kellen and I need to talk before we talk to you guys about this.” JC said.

“Go ahead guys. We’ll wait in here for you.” Lance said. Kellen mouthed a thank you to him and he and JC walked out shutting the door behind them. “What do you guys think?” Lance asked looking at each of them.

“I think I’m too shocked to even have an opinion at the moment.” Justin said. “I have to say, I never thought I’d see JC kissing another guy. Especially the way he was.”

“Joey? What about you.”

“Well, it was a shock. There is no doubt about that. I am a little upset that JC didn’t tell us he was gay. Over the past five years I thought we built a family. Why wouldn’t he tell us? We’re his brothers.”

“I think that maybe JC didn’t even realize he was gay until recently. He has dated a lot of girls in the past.” Lance rationalized.

“So you think that Kellen forced himself onto JC?” Chris said suddenly. “If he did, he is out of here.”

“No, I don’t think Kellen forced himself onto JC. Don’t you remember who was on top of whom out there? JC was on top of Kellen and they were both kissing each other. It was definitely mutual.” Lance defended

“Yeah, I guess your right. But why didn’t either of them tell us about this sooner. They must have had these feeling for each other for a while now. You don’t just decide to kiss someone out of nowhere.” Chris said.

“Well, if you were gay Chris would you find it easy to tell someone? Especially with the way society treats homosexuality. Also, we are constantly in the spotlight. I doubt that JC would want the world to know about him being gay.” Lance said looking at Chris and Joey.

“Lance is right.” Justin said. “As much as I was shocked at what I saw, I know it must be a hard thing to hide, especially for JC. He always tells us about things that are on his mind. I know he wouldn’t hold something back unless he was really scared about it changing the way we look at him.”

“Does it change the way we look at him? Because I really hope you guys aren’t bailing on him. Both he and Kellen are going to need a lot of support from us.” Lance said.

“I won’t hate JC and Kellen, or give them a hard time about this, but it will take some getting used to.” Chris said. “JC is like my younger brother and I’m not going to abandon him.”

“The same goes for me. I just hope they don’t want to include me in any sexual thing. This body belongs to Britney and no one else.” Justin said laughing. The others joined his laughter.

“Well I’m fine with it. Kellen is a very good guy. I would rather it be him that JC dated than someone we don’t know.” Lance said.

“I’m fine with it. JC is my brother and Kellen is a friend. I’ll stick by their side.” Joey said.

“Good. Now that that is all taken care of, all we have to do is wait for the two lovebirds to come backing here.” Lance said

“I hope they aren’t making out again. I’m going to need psychological help now.” Justin said.

“Well, Chris studied psychology. You can talk to him?” Joey said.

“I need help with my problem Joey. I don’t need someone to make it worse.” Justin said trying to dodge the pillow Chris threw at him.

On the other side of the bus, Kellen and JC started talking about what they wanted and where they wanted their newfound relationship to go.

Kellen shut the door and turned the lock. He looked at JC, “What?”

“We need to talk about us, where we want to go with this.” JC said. “I just don’t want the guys condemning us for this if we don’t even know what we want.”

“All I know is that when we kissed, I felt like I was floating. I could have stayed like that forever.” Kellen said looking into the two diamonds that were JC’s eyes.

“So you want to see where this will lead?” JC asked with a hopeful expression.

“Yes I do.”

“I didn’t even know you were gay. I knew I liked you, but I wasn’t going to risk losing the friendship we’d built.” JC said.

“I know. I felt the same way. I had no idea you liked me that way. I knew that there was something special about you the first time I saw you. I do have feelings for you Joshua Scott Chasez and I want to explore those feelings.” As Kellen finished, he reached over to JC and pulled him into a hug. They looked up at each other and kissed. They only kissed for a few seconds until Kellen quickly pulled away from JC. “Oh my God, What are my parents gonna say when I bring you home to meet them?”

JC grabbed him into a hug and whispered into his ear. “It’s going to be alright. I will be right there with you when you do. You won’t have to face this alone. We can face it together. Besides, if they love you, they will accept you for who you are.”

“I hope your right.” Kellen said as a tear fell down his cheek.

“Trust me.” JC said soothingly as he scratched Kellen’s back.

“I do Josh” Kellen said truthfully.

“What did you call me?’ JC asked looking at Kellen.

“I’m sorry, JC.” Kellen said correcting himself.

“Actually, I like it when you call me that.” JC said smiling.

“You do?”

“Yes I do.” JC replied

“Okay Josh.”

“We should probably get back in there before they get even angrier with us.” Both men stood up, shared a small kiss, and unlocked the door to face the rest of the group.

“It’s about time you guys got back. What took you so long anyway?” Joey asked.

“We had to discuss this whole situation.” Kellen said looking at Joey.

“Okay fair enough. We already discussed it among ourselves and we have just one question for you JC. Why didn’t you tell us you were gay sooner?”

“Guys, I didn’t even know I was gay until the first time I looked at Kellen.” JC said looking down. “After that, he was all I could think about. And I didn’t tell you sooner because I had to sort my feelings out for myself before I could share them with anyone else.”

“So you didn’t purposely keep this from us?” Chris asked.

“No Chris. I wouldn’t purposely do that to you guys.”

“Okay.” Chris said letting the subject drop. “We also talked about the two of you and what is going to happen from this point on.”

“Uh, so have we. And we both decided that we want to see where this relationship goes.” Kellen said looking at JC.

“Well, we all want you to know that we support you both in this matter. We were just very shocked at walking in and seeing you two on the floor like that.” Justin said.

“What happens if it doesn’t work out the way you both want it to? What happens then?” Joey asked.

“Then we’ll deal with it accordingly. Let’s just hope that we won’t come to that point because I have feelings for Kellen that I have never felt towards anyone before.” JC said giving Kellen’s hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Good, now that we have that settled, is there anything else that needs to be discussed?” Lance asked looking at everyone. “Good. Then this matter is dropped. Everyone is okay with Kellen and JC going out.”

“Wait.” Chris said. “Are you two planning on making this public?”

“No!” Both shouted at the same time. “We will see where it leads. If it does become permanent, then we can deal with whether or not we want to tell the press about us. But until we have to, it stays in the family.” JC said. Kellen looked at him and nodded. Everyone gathered in a group hug the finish the group meeting.

The bus traveled deeper into the night followed by the caravan of support staff, bodyguards, musicians, and semis. Things quieted down after the meeting and everyone started going back to what they were doing before the bus slammed on its breaks; with an exception of JC and Kellen. Instead of the two sitting opposite each other working on the song, they sat next to each other cuddling and talking about their hopes, dreams, and fears.

“So let me get this strait, your afraid of needles?” Kellen said chuckling at JC’s expense.

“Hey, it isn’t funny. They give me the creeps. Seeing any sharp object stuck into a person’s body is just wrong.” JC said shuttering at the thought. “So what about you? What scares you?”

“Hmmm, let’s see. Boy bands?” Kellen replied looking up at JC. JC just sighed against him. “Actually, I think that my biggest fear is loneliness. I can’t stand the thought of dying alone, or even being alone.”

“Well, as long as I’m here, you won’t be alone.” JC replied.

“Oh? And when did you become such a romantic?” Kellen asked looking up at JC.

“When I met you and fell in love.” JC said. He bent his head down and gave Kellen a kiss. Kellen shifted so that he and JC would be more comfortable.

“Now you see Curly, this is what we will have to deal with from now on.” Chris said as he and Justin came into the room to get water from the fridge.

“Come guys. Don’t make me get the hose.” Justin said

“Good luck finding a hose Justin.” JC said in-between kisses. What JC didn’t realize was that Justin had grabbed the sprayer from the miniature sink and was aiming it at both he and Kellen.

“Hey!” They shouted as the water hit them.

“Justin! I’m going to go to jail for murder if you don’t stop.” Kellen said grabbing the hose from Justin and turning it on him.

“Hey, that’s no fair.” Justin shouted.

“Well Curly, that’s why you shouldn’t mess with the master.” Kellen said triumphantly as he moved back over to JC. Justin pick up his bottled water and then he and Chris went back to the bunks. Kellen turned to JC, “I think maybe we should go to bed also. It’s midnight.”

“Yeah, your right. We can finish this song later. They’ll wake us up when we get into New York City.” JC finished.

“What time?” Kellen asked.

“Probably around 3 A.M. Don’t worry; I will wake you up so that there aren’t any pranks pulled.” JC said walking towards the bunks following Kellen. “Do I get a goodnight kiss?” JC asked holding Kellen’s hand.

“Oh please, there are people in here who want to dream sweet dreams, not have nightmares.” Joey said from inside his bunk. Following that, a snicker could be heard from someone else’s bunk.

Kellen put his finger to his lips telling JC to be silent and play along. “Oh JC, that’s the spot. Yeah baby, right there. Oh that feels so good. No one makes me hot like you do.” Kellen said. His voice was full of lust.

There were several sudden coughs and even someone choking on their water.

“Oh Kellen touch it. Yeah that feels so good.” JC said following Kellen’s lead. Right after JC said it, four curtains opened simultaneously and four heads popped out. “Hey baby, I think these guys like to watch.”

“Should we give them a show?” Kellen asked

“No!” the other four said all at once.

“I can’t believe you two. You’re such a bad influence on Justin here.” Chris said playfully

“Hey, I’m not a kid.” Justin protested.

“Let’s go to bed everyone. We have to get up when we get to the next city and then again at 9:00 in the morning” Lance said. Everyone settled down. Kellen and JC got into their own bunks and went to sleep.

TO BE CONTINUED…