Date: Thu, 21 Jun 2001 15:42:03 -0700 (PDT) From: Jim Higgins Subject: People Will Say We're In Love Greetings everyone, Here's the latest chapter. I haven't much to say except thank you to anyone who's written me with comments or nice words. It makes this whole experience worthwhile. Hey, I've also been nominated for a Dirty Pop Award. Here's the link to this neat website: http://www.sunkiststudios.com/dirtypopawards The form of the first half of this chapter is a little different. I wanted to convey the passing of time while things kept happening. So, now we push Justin further out of the closet.... enjoy! As usual: This story is purely fiction and is not intended to imply anything about the true sexuality of 'N Sync or anyone associated with their organization. It is meant for those over the age of 18 only and those who wish to read stories with sexual content. ****** People Will Say We're In Love "Don't throw bouquets at me, Don't please my folks too much, Don't laugh at my jokes too much, People will say we're in love. Don't take my arm too much, Don't keep your hand in mine, Your hand feels go grand in mine, People will say we're in love. Don't dance all night with me, Till the stars fade out of sight, They'll see it's alright with me, People will say we're in love." - Richard Rodgers/Oscar Hammerstein II: from Oklahoma! 1943 :::Rumor has it on good authority that one boy band member is more than a friend to a close buddy. The curly crooner is reported to be head over heels and will never say buh-bye to his boyfriend, or is that bye bye bye? Now it makes sense that he has constantly denied his attachment to B... Oops I almost did it again and gave away a name. He's been as quiet as a Mouse about the whole affair... no surprise there.::: - online gossip column blind item ------ Jay123: "So that Jamie guy just came out at that press conference." Piglet: "That's so brave. I wouldn't have the guts to do something like that." Johnny15: "Me neither. I don't know if I'll ever tell my parents." Jay123: "We know that he's not going out with Lance since they denied it." Johnny15: "That's good because it leaves him all for me! I LOVE LANCE." Piglet: "God we know.... that's all u ever talk about" guylover: "any ideas who it could be? he must be seeing someone there" Jay123: "my vote is for Joey." Piglet: "I vote JC" mekid17: "you're all wrong, it's gotta be Justin" Jay123: "Justin? no way" Johnny15: "He's hot too, but not as much as Lance" Piglet: "how can you be so sure" mekid17: "just a feeling I have... it's all over all the boards... Justin is gay" Jay123: "cool" -online internet teen chat room dedicated to boybands ------ "Welcome back, it's Rick Dees in the morning here at Kiis FM. Today we have NSync in the studio taking questions. Our next caller is Janine from Long Beach. What's your question Janine?" "Justin, what do you think about your friend, Jamie, admitting he's gay?" Justin rolled his eyes. "What's there to say? We all support Jamie fully. It took alot of courage for him to do that. I'm proud of his strength and am glad to call him my friend." "Next we have Trisha from Malibu." "I can't believe I'm talking to you guys. Is Lance feeling better now?" "Feeling better?" Lance asked. "Ya, you said you were stressed out. I hope you're ok. I love you guys." "Thanks Trisha. Yes, I'm fine so don't worry about me." "One final caller before our break and we let these guys get back to work. It's Jason from Laguna." "I'm a real big fan too and proud of it!" "Hey, guy! We love our guy fans too. Be proud!" Chris laughed over the air. "I just have one question. Are any of you dating that Jamie guy? If not can I get his number? I think he's hot!" Joey laughed out loud while Justin blushed a deep red. "No, none of us are dating him the last I knew," Chris answered. "But he is kinda handsome, isn't he Justin?" Justin just stared at Chris and stammered an answer. "Ya, he is." "Leave your number with the station Jason and we'll make sure Jamie gets it," Joey played along. "Thanks. You guys rock!" ------ December 6, 2000 - Las Vegas Sweet pea, You are in the shower and I'm all dressed and waiting. Today we head back to Orlando and start our vacation. For some reason this tour was the most stressful and at the same time the most happy. For me anyway. No matter what happens I feel the thing that is 'us' always getting stronger. I love having you with me. When I'm with you, my life makes sense. I never want to be away from you. I know that's a little unhealthy but I don't care. If I'm crazy then I'm happy because I'm with you. Please tell me if I start suffocating you. I don't want to do that. I'm looking forward to our first Christmas together. Then there's a whole new year to look forward to. 2001 will be our year to celebrate. I'm going to be your husband and the happiest man on earth. I love you with all my heart, Justin XOXOXO ------ "I knew you'd call back eventually." "Ya, well I did what you asked." "And?" "I didn't see much. I was with my brother and Howie." "What did you see? Was he there?" "Yes. He was acting like their personal assistant or something." "Do I have to pull every bit out of you..." "No, there's not much to tell. He seemed more like a friend than an employee to me." "That I already know." "He's actually pretty cool." "You would think so, you little slut." "Hey, you can't talk to me like that. I'm not the one using sex to get information." "You shouldn't have said that Nick." "Oh? And what are you gonna do?" "I have a little thing called a live show. I can say almost anything I want." "Ya and get fired right after. You say anything about this then I come clean about our little talks and then Backstreet will make sure you never work in the industry again. Got that?" "You have no idea what you're up against." "But I do. Jamie and I had a nice long talk. We met once before, but you didn't know that. We're all on to your little game." "You little shit!" "Oh and Carson? Don't think about pushing it with me. Kevin's not so happy with you right now and neither is AJ. They can be -real- protective of me, if you catch my drift." Nick hung up the phone with a satisfied smile. Howie mussed his hair while Kevin looked on approvingly. ------ LancesToy: 12/8/00 08:35:33 est Why are we still posting about this? So that Jamie guy is gay? Who cares. When's the next appearance? The Billboard awards rocked! They were so cute. NSYNCROCKS: 12/8/00 08:55:02 est We ask because he's a part of NSync and we like to know aaaalllllll about them. They're on vacation. Saw an ad that they are singing on Christmas eve at Disney. JCsBabe: 12/8/00 14:56 est Kelly was on tour with them this fall too. I saw her in St. Louis. She's gained some weight but looks good. She and Joey seemed real close. Cuddlebaby: 12/8/00 15:15 est So the question is still there... who's gay? What's the vote? BSBfan: 12/8/00 15:34 est Definitely Lance... and JC. JC definitely... just look at his clothes. NSYNCROCKS: 12/8/00 19:00 est You would say that, BSBfan. I think Nick is, maybe even Brian. Lance is a good bet. JC? doubt it. One or more of the guys from BBMak for sure... they're too good looking. LOL BSBfan: 12/8/00 19:32 est No way! Not Brian, he just got married. Nick's had girlfriends, so there goes your theory. degreefan: 12/8/00 20:45 est I heard Jeff Timmons is bi.... but don't know how true that is LancesToy: 12/8/00 21:06 est I think Justin is gay. Just look at how he acts sometimes. He's way too sensitive. Hey... what if he was going with that Jamie guy? Cuddlebaby: 12/8/00 21:27 est That would be interesting. I think Wade is gay. He's too cute to be straight and he's a dancer. OTowngirl: 12/8/00 21:34 est What's being a dancer got to do with being gay? Ya so most of them are... well, ok, I guess I answered my own question. I saw Justin and Jamie at the mall last week. Looked like they were Christmas shopping. They were real nice and Justin gave me an autograph and a hug. They looked good together... very very cute... both of them. If they are gay then more power to them. -MTV music discussion message boards ------ Date: 12/10/00 6:02 PM Eastern Standard Time From: leadtrumpet@aol.com To: Guitarboy@yahoo.com Subj: Buddy.... Jamie, Thanks for the invite for Christmas or part of it anyway. Right now I'm planning on spending my break at home in Boston. After the family thing is over I have a bunch of gigs around New Year's, so it looks like me coming down isn't gonna happen. Maybe after the first.... I'll let you know. I'll make sure I get the presents I got you to Dan. Sounds like a great time with all the relatives in Florida. Wish I could make it. I'm seriously considering going back to school. The freelance thing is working out ok and I'm getting more than enough gigs to make ends meet, but I can't see myself doing this long term. I'll need a degree to take it up a level, I guess, but you know all about that. When you heading back? Been monitoring the internet and news about you guys. Seems like most of the gay community, especially here in the city, has decided that Justin is gay. So it seems the plan is working. Around here, he's almost at the level of speculation that they give Ricky Martin and Tom Cruise. Sounds like a good place to be if you ask me. If there's anything I can do let me know. If you're anywhere near NYC or Boston in the next month give me a ring. Take care, send my love to Justin Zack ------ 12/15/00 - Orlando It still bothers me a little that I'm keeping this journal from Justin. I started it at almost the same time as the other one. I think he suspects but respects my privacy. That makes me feel all the more guilty. I just looked. This is only the fourth entry but the first one doesn't count... it doesn't say anything, really. I keep wondering why I don't want to share these. They are mine alone. I guess I'm allowed a little something for just myself. The whole plan is getting way too messy. I tried to tell Justin that but he didn't seem to understand. He and the guys are thrilled by how it's doing. Mel is being cautious but seems to agree with everyone. The thing in Toronto really scared me. I am happy I didn't trust Carson all the way even though I was tempted to. Nick Carter certainly taught me that lesson. He's really not that bad of a guy, although a little self-absorbed. His brother is a riot, reminds me of Phil. Seems Carson put on quite a show for me. He'll get his. Chris was so pissed. Nick said Backstreet was behind us... (well he and Brian are, that I know) and said they'd do anything they could. We kept it from Howie at the time but Nick will probably tell him anyway. They are alot like us and don't keep any secrets from each other. I don't want to go out and I know that it hurts Justin. We went Christmas shopping together last week because he begged me and I didn't have the heart to disappoint him. He's been so looking forward to doing all those little holiday things together. We were stopped for autographs and I was uncomfortable the entire time. I think I hid it well but he noticed. He wants to continue our little 'excursions' and create more gossip. I just can't. I now feel like a prisoner of my life. I share most of the blame for that. I hate this feeling. I'm worried about Lance but I wrote that all down in the other book. When Justin reads it he's probably gonna flip out again. He and Josh are way too close for him to see the problems. But Chris and Joey noticed that Lance isn't himself. He's been seeing Greg for about two weeks now and seems better. I think he's on some meds. Supposedly Josh is seeing Greg too, but I think he ditches out on his appointments. I just want everything quiet and sane for the holidays. That's all I ask. ------ "Welcome back to Access Hollywood. Finally tonight, it's an age old question that's been asked frequently. Sometimes we get the answer and most times not. From Elton John and Rock Hudson, to Tom Cruise and Ricky Martin. From the open admissions of KD Lang and Ellen DeGeneres to the scandal of George Michael. Who's gay in the entertainment industry has always been a burning question. Everyone has their own reasons to ask. The media with it's all encompassing need to know, groups like ACT/Up and Glaad wanting support positive prominent role models, religious groups to condemn a lifestyle they say is immoral and the average citizen who just either doesn't care or just likes to hear a good news story. A new name, lately, has been added to the list of celebrities that remain an open question. Until now Ricky Martin has been the biggest name in the music business to withhold the answer even under Barbara Walter's direct questioning. All eyes have turned to 19 year old Justin Timberlake, one of the lead singers of the smash Pop group, NSync. Taking a lesson from the Ricky Martin playbook, Justin has answered any direct questions recently with either a privacy statement or no statement at all. That in itself is not conclusive evidence since many celebrities, even the heterosexual ones, refuse to answer such questions. But there seems to be fuel to add to the fire. His constant companion is openly gay and a member of the group's band. They have been seen in public together numerous times in the last few months including stops at restaurants, shopping and other normal everyday activities. With all the documented sightings, it almost seems as if they weren't avoiding being seen together. Until Justin answers the question directly we are still left wondering. As we say goodnight, here's a clip of NSync from their latest performance at the Billboard Awards. Goodnight." ------ Jamie floated in peace on the air mattress. The gentle lapping sound of the water against the sides of the pool soothed him. Adding in the warmth of the sun, he soon became drowsy. Moving his fingers lazily in the water, he sighed happily. 'Why couldn't every day be like this one?' he thought to himself. The day started off normal enough. He woke wrapped in Justin's arms. They cuddled for awhile, enjoying being close without worrying if they had enough time. Justin had put his foot down at the end of the tour and made sure that if there were meetings, photo shoots or anything group related during the break that they took place after lunch. He wanted to devote mornings to Jamie. After an hour of quiet kisses, they got up to get some much needed breakfast. They ate cuddled on the porch swing, appreciating the warm day and spending most of the morning holding each other and talking quietly about the upcoming holidays. Justin left for a lunch meeting followed by an interview and promised to bring something home for dinner. Jamie filled his afternoon by practicing for some studio time the following week, playing with a much grown Fitzgerald and ended up lazing in the pool. Jamie was feeling guilty. Guilty and frustrated. Justin wanted to go shopping for Christmas ornaments and decorations and Jamie was running out of excuses to put it off. He knew Justin wanted to take him to dinner and would push to do it tonight. Justin was care and worry free and Jamie wasn't so confident. Every time they went anywhere lately he was on guard and couldn't enjoy himself. The tenseness eventually transferred to Justin and they would just go home. Jamie knew he was in the middle of an unhealthy cycle but just didn't have the strength to break it. 'We can't keep living like this,' he scolded himself. 'He's not worried so why should I be?' Another sigh escaped his lips. The feeling of a cool wet hand sliding up his leg made him open his eyes. Justin was standing beside him smiling. "I didn't even hear you get in the pool." "I was extra quiet. The water feels good." Jamie ran his fingertips along Justin's collar bone. "I'm sorry," he apologized. Justin nodded and brought his other hand to Jamie's hair. "You don't have to apologize for how you feel. I understand." "I'm not sorry for that. I'm sorry that it's hurting you." Justin leaned over and kissed Jamie tenderly. "Oh, sweet pea. I'm more frustrated than hurt." "That doesn't excuse the way I've been acting." "No it doesn't, but I understand. I think we're both frustrated at being so close but also having to be even more careful." Jamie smiled at Justin. "That's it exactly. I'm scared, Justin. Scared of messing this up, of ruining your life." Justin's mouth got tight. "If it goes wrong then we're -both- responsible. As for ruining my life, you could never do that. You are my life. NSync is only something that I do." Justin leaned down and kissed Jamie, trying to ease his fears and his own pain. "How was your meeting?" "Boring, as usual," Justin chuckled. "I saw Mel for a little bit at the interview. She says that things are all in line. We just have to wait now for the right time. You know, when it feels right." Jamie nodded. He ran his fingers down the center of Justin's chest to his stomach. He played with the hair growing there as Justin giggled. Justin grabbed Jamie's hand and their fingers intertwined. Justin leaned down to kiss his fingers. Jamie sighed happily. "I guess she wants us to go out more together, huh?" "Ya, she did mention it. But only if we felt ok about it..." Justin trailed off looking at Jamie intently. Jamie found it impossible to deny Justin anything. "Why don't we go out tonight and get some Christmas decorations?" The smile on Justin's face wiped away any doubts Jamie had and made him warm inside. He would do anything to see Justin smile that way. Justin leaned on the mattress and swam with it further into the deep end as their lips met. "I love you, sweet pea." "Love you more, cutie." Jamie wrapped his arms around Justin's neck and slipped into the water and into his arms. They bobbed, barely staying above water and not caring. Justin's tongue had taken residence in Jamie's mouth as they both groaned. With a grunt, Jamie found himself pressed against the side of the pool. Justin reached up with both hands and gripped the edge as Jamie wrapped his arms around Justin's neck. Jamie's back was flush against the side with Justin pressed firmly against him. "Geez, don't you guys ever get enough?" Joey asked from above them. "Go away, Fatone," Justin said happily barely moving his lips away from Jamie's. "Ok and I'll take this basket my mom told me to drop off here with me." Justin looked up sharply and smiled. "You do and I'll have to hurt you." "Ya, like I'm scared," Joey joked. "I'll put it on the counter in the kitchen. See you in the morning." "Ten right?" Justin asked. "On the dot at my house. Bye, Jamie." Jamie couldn't answer, his mouth was once again being kept busy by Justin. "So what's in the basket?" he finally asked when Justin let him up for some air. "Dinner... Fatone style with Timberlake flair." "I can't wait." With a happy moan he once again took Justin's lips with his. Jamie clung onto him tightly as he lost himself in the sensations of Justin's body touching his. Wrapping his legs around Justin's waist, Jamie used his hands to slip Justin's shorts down his hips and off. His suit followed right after. Once they were both naked, Jamie started humping against Justin's stomach, making them both moan. Justin broke the kiss and looked at Jamie with a fevered look. He glanced around and grabbed the mattress floating nearby and pulled it to them. He helped Jamie get on then easily climbed on top of him. Jamie wrapped his legs back around Justin's waist and held on tight with his arms. "Oh, sweet pea, I love the way you feel." Jamie rubbed his feet down the back of Justin's legs feeling the hair tickle the bottoms of his feet. "You feel good, too. How horny are you?" "Very. I'm so hard I think I'll cum soon," Justin panted into Jamie's neck as he pressed with his hips. Jamie groaned under him, his straining erection responding to the pressure. "Me, too." Justin attacked Jamie's mouth once again and their tongues dueled back and forth between them. They moved against each other, bringing out soft moans of pleasure, their hard members trapped between their stomachs. Justin's hips pushed repeatedly into Jamie as his breathing became ragged, his eyes glazed in pleasure. Jamie lovingly licked at Justin's lips as he moaned and grasped Jamie's shoulders. With a loud grunt, Justin started shooting between them. "Oh God! Ugh...." Jamie held him tight, feeling the warmth spread between them. Justin rested his forehead against Jamie's, his heaving breath tickling Jamie's lips. "Damn, I love you," Justin panted. "You are so sexy when you cum," Jamie smiled at him. "I much prefer the way you look." Justin smirked and slipped to Jamie's side. Scooting down, he grabbed Jamie's throbbing dick and licked at it. Tasting his cum and Jamie's precum made Justin's mouth water. Jamie sighed loudly as Justin took him fully into his mouth. "JuJu, that feels so good." Justin ran a hand up Jamie's stomach and his fingers were soon coated with his own load. Scooping up as much as he could he brought his fingers to Jamie's mouth. Jamie greedily licked and sucked Justin's fingers clean as Justin took him deeply into his throat. Justin went down once then a second time before Jamie yelled out loudly and started shooting. Justin nearly choked at the amount but kept on swallowing as Jamie gradually relaxed. Moving back up on the mattress, Justin pulled Jamie to him and lazily ran his hand up and down Jamie's stomach. "Justin, promise me that this will never change. You know, being together and just loving each other." "That's an easy promise," Justin replied with a kiss on Jamie's cheek. "I want to do this with you until the day I die." Jamie placed a hand on the side of Justin's face and smiled. "Who said you were going first?" Justin kissed him with a chuckle. ------ "No, JuJu. That won't work." "But I like it." "Well, maybe if we put the tree in the game room." "No, I want it next to the piano in the window." The edgy, but good-natured, banter carried into the main lounge as Justin and Jamie joined the others at the compound. "So nice of you two to finally join us," Chris chastised with a wide grin. Justin checked his watch. "Hey, we're only 3 minutes late." "So what are you two arguing about?" Joey asked. "Christmas decorations." "Decorations? What's so hard about that." "Ok, this is the problem. Jamie wants a more traditional tree, lots of silver and gold ornaments and stuff." "That sounds nice," Lance commented. "So what's the problem?" Chris asked. "Well, Justin wants multicolored lights that blink all over the place and all these different things. I think the classy tree fits better with the decor of the living room." "I still don't get it." "Chris why don't we let -you- eat in our living room?" Jamie asked. "Um... because it's all white and cream... oh I get it." Jamie nodded. "Looks like we have more discussing to do," Justin said with a smile. "Why don't you just have two trees." The suggestion, coming from JC, made them all look at him. "What?" "He speaks," Joey intoned. "Shut up, you," JC said sticking his tongue out at Joey. "If you can't decide then have the traditional tree in the living room and do another more modern one down in the game room." JC shrugged. Justin looked at Jamie thoughtfully then smiled. "Seems we have a winner. Thanks, Josh." JC waved at Justin dismissively to say 'no problem.' "Ok, let's get settled. I promise this is all we have scheduled besides Christmas eve until after New Years. So let's get at it." Lance looked around at the groans he received. "Or we could all come back a week earlier and take care of it..." "Nope, right now is fine," Joey said quickly. Lance nodded in satisfaction. Jamie watched him with concern. Lance looked tired and beat as he went to the task and handed the other four guys small mail sacks, keeping one for himself. JC took his with a nod toward Lance and went into a corner of the room. "These were all specially picked as usual and separated for all of us. Justin, here's another bag like you requested." "What's in that one?" Chris asked peering at him suspiciously. "Should be all the mail from our gay fans and any that more than mention the rumors. I thought it would be a good idea to see what they say and answer them personally if I can," Justin replied. "Good idea," Joey concurred. "Does anyone want anything from the kitchen?" Jamie asked as he stood. "Just some drinks would be nice," Chris asked. "And some chips or something," Joey added. Jamie nodded. "Ok, be right back." "Don't take too long," Lance admonished. "Why?" Lance chucked a stack of mail wrapped in elastic bands toward Jamie then shoved a small box toward him. He caught the bundle easily and looked at Lance puzzled. "That's all your mail," Lance explained. "And that's the gift box." Jamie recognized the way the gifts received in the mail were processed by the WEG staff. He'd seen the guys go through similar boxes often. "My mail? But there must be a least three dozen letters here." "Not bad for a back up band member," Joey laughed. Even JC looked up and winked at Jamie with a sad smile. Once supplying everyone with a soda and handing Chris and Joey chips and pretzels, Jamie sat and opened the stack nervously. Justin noticed and patted his leg. "They won't bite you, sweet pea." Jamie smiled at him. "I know, I'm just nervous. I never thought I'd be getting fan mail." Justin kissed Jamie's temple and went back to signing the form letters and putting some personal remarks at the bottom every so often depending on the mail he was reading. Jamie took the letter out of the first envelope and started reading. It was a typical letter from a 14 year old girl thinking that by writing him she could get something different than the usual fan mail. He read letter after letter, some touching him with their honesty and others making him smile. He got to the end with a broad smile on his face but a question nagged at him. "Lance, are these -all- of them or did they pick and choose?" Lance looked up from the letter we was signing. "I asked, that's the whole bunch. Why?" "There wasn't one negative in it and they all mentioned me coming out. Isn't that a little strange?" "Well, Mel said that WEG has received a few phone calls from the usual groups wanted to denounce anything they can, but nothing unusual. The party line is that WEG and NSync don't discriminate because of many things including sexual orientation." "I guess anybody who has a problem with it wouldn't bother to write you a letter, too much work," Chris added. Jamie nodded and opened the gift box. Inside were the usual small stuffed animals and little toy things that fans either made or bought thinking of the guys. The general theme of the collection though was a potpourri of gay pride. One little stuffed bear had a pink triangle on his breast and a rainbow scarf around his neck. He kept that aside and a couple of others and wrote a note to the staff to make sure the rest went out to the local hospital. He suggested the pediatric Aids unit. A few hours later everything was answered. Justin and Jamie retained the 'special' letters, most from gay and lesbian teens. ------ Jamie hated waiting at airports. Sitting in uncomfortable seats, with not much to do but stare and think, wasn't his idea of a good time. Unfortunately he didn't have much of a choice. The weather in New York had delayed the flight and it didn't makes sense for him to go home, spend 15 minutes then come back. Sitting in the terminal, he watched the steady stream of people flying in and out of town. It was so easy to pick out the tourists from the regular travelers. He pulled his ball cap firmly down on his head. One of the side effects of being a 'close personal friend' of Justin Timberlake was his loss of anonymity. Being almost constantly recognized everywhere he turned the last couple of weeks was certainly disconcerting. He never drew the crowds of girls that the guys did, he wasn't -that- popular, but there was always a small group that was just curious to get a glimpse of the inner workings of their favorite group. Jamie was slowly getting used to it and he supposed deep down he knew it would come. In the last couple of weeks, the speculation had not lessened. Once Justin came out and their relationship became public knowledge, everyone would know who he was. They were both thankful that after the New Year the band would be in the public eye much less as they recorded the next album. Therefore, the questions during interviews and appearances would be less. Finally the flight was called and Jamie went to the gate. Almost immediately Phil and his mother came out the door. Phil ran into his arms and hugged him tightly. Jamie pushed Phil away and greeted his mother. "Come on, let's go get your luggage and get out of here." They made their way down to the luggage carousel. "So what's with the hat and glasses? You look like one of the guys," Phil joked. Jamie frowned. "It's become necessary, unfortunately. My little public admission seems to have made me a kind of celebrity. I can't go anywhere without being recognized, it seems." "Wow, my own brother's famous!" Phil cheered. Jamie sighed and shook his head at him. "It's nothing to be happy about mostly." Pat put her hand on Jamie's shoulder. "Has it been bad?" "Well, no, not really. Everyone's been very polite. They mostly want to see if they can get an 'in' with the guys. Sometimes I actually meet some nice kids." "Then what's the problem?" Phil asked confused. "It's just alot to deal with, that's all. You don't know what it's like. One day you can walk through the mall and nobody looks at you and the next you draw a small crowd." Jamie shrugged. "I always knew that eventually it would happen, especially when Justin went public. I guess I wasn't as ready for it as I thought." Pat hugged her son. "You'll be fine." Jamie nodded and smiled at her. ------ Finally everyone left and they were alone. Dan was fast asleep up in the guest room and Phil and Wade were bunking down in the game room on the pull-out couches there. Pat had accepted Lynn's invitation to stay with her and Paul, while Randall and his family had rented a condo nearby for the week for them and Justin's grandparents. Jamie and Justin sat on the floor of the living room with just the silver light of the Christmas tree. "It really is beautiful," Justin smiled. Jamie looked at him lovingly. "Almost as beautiful as you." They clinked their wine glasses and took sips after a brief kiss. "Do you think it went well?" "I think so. It was nice having our first Christmas eve at our house with all our family with us." Justin smiled warmly. "It was. I'm glad that they could all be here. What time is it, sweetie?" Jamie checked his watch. "Just past midnight." Justin pulled him close and kissed him hard. "Merry Christmas, my love." tbc... There's the latest. Comments and suggestions are always welcome! Jim bangoremail1@yahoo.com