Date: Fri, 23 Nov 2001 15:33:52 -0500 From: Writer Boy Subject: jc's hitchhiker - part 21 Obligatory warnings and disclaimers: 1) If reading this is in any way illegal where you are or at your age, or you don't want to read about male/male relationships, go away. You shouldn't be here. 2) I don't know any of the celebrities in this story, and this story in no way is meant to imply anything about their sexualities, personalities, or anything else. This is a work of pure fiction. Questions and commentary can be sent to "writerboy69@hotmail.com". I've enjoyed hearing from all of you. So, on with Season 2 of the story. *** "What?" Josh asked quickly, paling. "This is about you," I said, jabbing at the newspaper so hard with my finger that it almost punched through. "What do you mean?" he asked, walking around the table to peer over my shoulder at the page. Josh's chest was against my back, and I could feel his heart fluttering nervously through his shirt even as his breath quickened on my neck. Absently I reached around for the hand I knew was on its way to mine, and I gripped tightly as his eyes followed my pointing finger to a tiny paragraph about halfway down the gossip column. "Reliable sources tell me that a member of a Pop-ular boyband was seen in the Valley at a Pop-ular men's club last night. You know, the kind for men who like the company of men. Reports have it that he was seen drinking, dancing, and yes, even kissing! I'm not naming any names, but I bet if you think about it you'll find your instincts in sync with mine!" "Oh, ok," Josh sighed, patting my shoulder. "OK?" I asked, incredulous, as Josh walked back around to his seat. I looked around the table, and saw that Chris and Joey didn't appear especially concerned, either. "Wait a minute. Why isn't anyone else upset about this?" "Sorry, Jack," Chris said, giggling. I gave serious thought to slapping him. "But it's not that bad." "Not that bad?" I asked. "This is about Josh! It has the name of the band in it." "Not exactly," Joey said, shrugging. "What is wrong with you people?" I asked, looking across the table. Josh didn't look especially upset, either, just a little unsettled. "Josh?" Josh reached across the table and took my hand. "Jack, it's not as bad as you think," he said. "It's a blind item. Papers run blind items about us all the time. They do it to everyone." "But it practically comes right out and says who he means," I said, looking back down at the page. "Look, he keeps separating the word 'Pop', and he uses the name of the band right there." "Yeah, but he doesn't actually say it's me," Josh said. "Which means he has no pictures, probably. Since it's just rumor, he can't really report it, so it gets dropped into a blind item instead." "But," I began again, but then stopped. No one else seemed really bothered, so why should I be? "This guy's been writing about us since the plane landed," Chris said, shrugging. "If he could figure out where we're staying he'd probably be out back going through the garbage," Joey added. "And this is legal?" I asked. "Jack, it's a gossip column!" Chris said, laughing. "Yes, it's legal, because he doesn't actually name names," Josh said. "That thing with the 'Pop' is what he does when he writes about us, and people know who he means." "Look, Jack, there's a ton of them on the page," Joey said. "He does this to everybody." "You should see what he does to the Backstreet Boys," Chris said. The others smiled. "What do they do?" I asked, curious. "Not all of them," Chris said. "But Nick Carter has slept with everything." "What?" I blurted, almost shooting beer out of my nose. "I saw him molesting a chair at this club in Orlando," Joey added seriously. "These kids today." At that we all cracked up, letting the moment pass. "Besides," Chris said, taking the paper from me and folding it back up. "Even if this one's a little closer than most, we all know it's not true. Josh wasn't out cheating on you last night." Dead silence greeted this, and Chris immediately realized that he'd said the wrong thing. Josh gaped at me, eyes wide, but I still had hold of his hand, and didn't let go. Joey watched, eyes bulging as he struggled not to ask questions. "Well, actually," I began, not sure what I could say to cover this one. Chris had a way of catching us off guard. "Actually, I was," Josh said, looking down. "I was upset, and I made a mistake, and Jack forgave me for it." "Because there's nothing to forgive," I added. "And because I love you." "I love you, too," he answered. We stared into each other's eyes as if the others didn't exist. "Get a room," Joey said, and we all laughed again. "I'm sorry, guys," Chris said, shrugging. "Don't be," I said. "It's nothing." "Can you pass me another water?" Josh asked, changing the subject. Chris dropped it, but I could tell he still felt a little bad about it. Maybe we could talk about it in the morning, when we went on our jog. I had forgotten I didn't mention that to Josh, but he seemed pleased when Chris brought it up. "You want to go?" I asked. "No, I usually work out at the gym with Justin," he said. "But you guys have fun." "You never asked me to go jogging," Joey said, staring at Chris, his bottom lip pushed out pitifully. "I want someone who can actually run," Chris said, laughing. "You can call Jack if you need someone to go pick up donuts with you." They both laughed, punching each other in the arm. "Jerk," Joey said, smacking the back of Chris's head. "Fatass," Chris said, throwing a balled up napkin at him. Josh and I just watched and laughed. It was nice to see the camaraderie between them, and to feel included. I was still thinking about it later when Josh and I finally went up to the apartment, bidding Joey and Chris a good night. Joey grinned, winking with exaggerated suggestiveness as he carried the leftovers into his apartment. Chris just waved, calling someone on his cell phone as he rolled the grill off to the side. It was dark in the apartment, and Josh swept me up into his arms as soon as we got through the door. I felt his hair brush my cheek as his lips slid toward mine. He pulled me against him, his mouth tasting faintly of steak, as his hands slid down my back and mine slid up his chest to rest on it. I felt him breathing as he kissed me, pulled back, and then kissed me again, soft kisses, not chaste but not urgently needing tongue kisses, either. Josh's lips were soft, but still firm, and I was happy just to press against him and let him do whatever he wanted. "What was that for?" I asked. "Because I love you," he answered, as if I should have known. I should have, actually. "And I love that my friends love you, too. Thanks for being so perfect." "Josh, I really didn't do anything," I said. "But thanks for thinking I did." "No, I mean it," he said, still holding me. "It's important to me that you guys get along. I'm glad you and Chris are going to start running, too. It'll be nice for him to have someone, you know, his age to hang out with." "I so want to smack you right now," I said, as he playfully restrained my hands. "I'm only a year older than you." "You know," he began, pressing against me, pushing his entire body against mine. "It feels like it was a really hard year." "If that's not a sleazy pickup line, I don't know what is," I said, tugging him toward the bedroom. "Let's get cleaned up, and then maybe I'll show you just how hard." We both stripped down to our shorts quickly, and then jammed into the bathroom together to brush our teeth. For some reason, the sight of the two of us, side by side in the bathroom mirror, both with foamy toothpaste gobs spilling out of our mouths, was absurdly touching to me. I thought it might be the most romantic thing I'd seen all day. When we finished, I gave him another quick hug, feeling the warmth of his bare chest against mine, but I saw him wince a little. "What's wrong, Josh?" I asked. "Are you still sore from the car wreck?" "A little," he admitted. "My shoulders and my back feel kind of tight." "Why don't we go on into bed, and I'll give you a nice backrub," I said. "We can use some baby oil, and I'll loosen you up, and then we'll see what develops." "Sure," he said, grinning. Josh lay down on the bed on his stomach, crossing his arms under his chin. I climbed on top, straddling him, but being careful not to rest too much of my weight on him, as I didn't want to make it worse somehow. I squirted a little baby oil onto his back, not stopping to think that it might be cold, and saw him jump a little. "Sorry," I said, quickly running my hands through it, pressing down firmly. "It's ok," he said, turning his head to the side and little and closing his eyes. "It feels nice." "Good," I said, moving up to begin rubbing his shoulders. When Josh had come to visit me, he had surprised me on the second night with a fantastic massage that I still remembered. He had also surprised me by blindfolding me and tying me to the bed, but tonight all I really wanted to do was reciprocate that massage for him, and give back some of what he had given me. It hurt me to know that he was in pain, and I wanted to do whatever I could to help take it away. Josh responded to my gentle ministrations with groans, and shifting, telling me where to put my hands as they slid easily over him. I traced the topography of his back, which I was already intimately familiar with, admiring his rounded shoulders and the obvious strength of his neck. I ran my hands over the fans of muscle on either side of his spine, and gently kneaded and pressed where he guided me. Just being close to him, I began to get hard, and rubbing my hands over his oil-slickened back did nothing to alleviate that condition. As I worked my way down his back I occasionally let my fingers slip a little, creeping around the sides, and then I reached the waistband of his boxer briefs, brushing the tips of my fingers over the rounded rise of his granite ass. "Hey, Josh," I whispered, trying to frame some sort of sleazy come on line in my head. No answer. "Josh?" I asked, leaning up. He had fallen asleep. And I was stuck sitting on top of him with an almost painfully throbbing hard on. Sighing, I climbed carefully off of the bed, trying to figure out what I should do. I set the alarm clock, so that I'd be up in the morning for my jog with Chris, but that didn't really do anything to help me out with my present condition. I decided that maybe I'd just take a quick swim in the pool, to cool myself down, and then I'd come up and go to bed, too. If Josh was tired enough to fall asleep without sex, he probably needed his rest. I changed quickly into a pair of trunks, grabbed a towel, and went downstairs to the pool. I didn't see anyone while I was in the pool, and it was kind of relaxing being out there by myself. I floated around on my back for a while, staring up at the sky and thinking about how it was kind of sad that you couldn't really see any of the stars in the city, because the light washed them out. You see all of those movies where people look down on Los Angeles, and the city is all lit up with the shining night sky above it, but those people are outside of town. If you're actually inside, you hardly see anything when you look up. There are lots of other stars, though, to compensate for the lack of celestial ones. I pulled myself out of the pool, finally, my little problem long since taken care of, and was standing off to the side, drying myself, when I heard a door open above me. Running footsteps pounded over the walkway and then clattered down the stairs, and I saw Lance run into his apartment and slam the door behind him. I'd been standing half in shadow, near one of Jackie's obnoxiously large potted plants, so he probably hadn't seen me. I wasn't sure, but it looked almost like he was crying. I debated what to do. If Lance was having some sort of emotional moment, he probably didn't want me, of all people, knocking on his door to see if he was ok. On the other hand, I hadn't heard the door on the upper level close yet, so if I looked out now, I could see where he had come from. Climbing the stairs quickly, my towel thrown casually over my shoulders, I saw that Justin's door was standing open. A faint, flickering light came from inside, and I knocked, my hand pushing the door open the rest of the way. Justin was sitting in the middle of the couch, sprawled back in that comfortable way of his with his arms slung across the back and his legs wide in front of him. The flickering light came from the television, as he idly sat flipping through the channels. He was shirtless, the light playing across his chest and abs, and he was wearing a pair of white warm up pants with buttons up the side. They seemed to glow unnaturally in oddly bluish light of the television. "Yeah?" he asked, turning his head. His annoyed sneer changed to a smile when he saw me. "Jack! What are you doing up?" "I was in the pool," I began uncertainly from the doorway. He waved at one of the chairs, and I walked in and sat down. Justin was extremely attractive, especially half naked, and I locked my eyes onto his face to keep them from roaming over his body, not that it really would have mattered, considering what we'd done. "I saw Lance go running out of here, and I thought maybe I'd check and see if everything was ok." "I'm fine," Justin said, shrugging. "We were having a discussion, and I said some things Lance didn't want to hear, so he left." "He looked kind of upset," I said, surprised by Justin's lack of concern. Chris and Josh had both told me that there was a lot of strain between Lance and Justin, but I guess it went a little deeper than I had thought. "He probably is," Justin said casually, glancing at the television again. "Like I said, I said some things he didn't want to hear. He'll come back, though." "How do you know that?" I asked. Why would Lance come back to finish a discussion that made him leave the room in tears? "I just know," Justin said, shifting. The twirls of golden hair under his arms glinted in the light of the television as his arms and shoulders flexed, moving him a little closer to me. "Just because he doesn't want to hear it doesn't make it less true. He'll come back for the rest." I shrugged. Justin's explanation sort of made sense, but I had the feeling I'd missed something important. Then again, I didn't really know anything about Lance, except what I'd heard from other people, so I had no idea if this was typical behavior for him or not. "So why are you out in the pool, and not next door?" Justin asked. "Everything ok?" "Yeah, everything's fine," I said, curling my legs up under me on the chair. "Josh fell asleep, and I didn't want to wake him." Justin leaned forward, the shifting and bunching of his bare muscles creating another beautiful show in the flickering half-light of the television screen. "I know this is probably none of my business, but I'm kind of worried about Josh, still," Justin began. "Did you guys work everything out?" "Justin, you can ask that," I said simply. "He's you're best friend, and you and I are getting pretty tight. If you ask something that you shouldn't, I'll just tell you. Back to your question, though, yeah, we did." "And you're not mad?" Justin asked. "About, you know, those guys?" I guess Josh really did tell Justin everything. "No, I'm not mad," I said, shrugging. "Josh was upset, he was drunk, and he thought I had left for good. He made a mistake, but an understandable one." "You're pretty understanding," Justin said, leaning back, his torso stretching in new and different ways. "It doesn't bother you, knowing that he touched all those different guys?" I stared at Justin, wondering why he'd even bring that up like that, but then thought that maybe he just wasn't thinking. "Honestly, it doesn't exactly thrill me to know," I said. "But they didn't really do anything, and it was a mistake. It's not like he's going to do it again." "What about you?" Justin asked, leaning forward again. "Would you ever cheat on him, you know, to get back at him?" "No, Justin," I said, wondering if this was going where I thought it was. But Justin wouldn't do that. We'd already had a discussion about this, and he had explained that he didn't want either me or Josh. Maybe I was just misreading his signals. "I'm sorry," he said, shaking his head. "I upset you, and I didn't mean to. I was just curious, and wanted to make sure you guys were ok." "It's fine, Justin," I said, waving a hand dismissively. "Just drop it, ok? It's not my favorite topic." "Sure," he said, settling back into his original, arms flung position. "I'm curious about something else, though." "Yes?" I asked, trying to read his face. "How come you came to check on me, instead of Lance?" he asked. "Your door was open," I answered. "His was closer," Justin pointed out. "Are you still mad at him?" I thought about it for a moment. "I am, a little," I said. "I mean, he sort of apologized, but I don't think he really meant it. I think he was just trying to smooth things over for Josh's sake. Actually, that's what he said, and I guess I kind of resent that he doesn't seem to think he did anything really bad." "He hurt you both, didn't he?" Justin asked. "Josh more than me," I answered. "But hurting Josh is as bad as hurting me." "How does Josh feel about it?" Justin asked, his head cocked thoughtfully to one side. "I'm not really sure," I answered, shrugging. "I mean, we talked about it when he went to talk to Lance that first time, after the barbecue, but not since then, when Lance said all that other stuff. I haven't brought it up, and neither has Josh, so I didn't really want to push it if it wasn't something he wanted to talk about. I think Lance really hurt him, though." "He did say some pretty fucked up shit," Justin said, shaking his head. "He was really out of line." "Is that why you clocked him?" I asked. I'd been wondering about this since Justin did it. At the time I thought maybe Lance was hitting a nerve because Justin was still confused about his feelings toward me and Josh, but then Justin had explained later that he wasn't all that confused after all. "I clocked him because he was out of line, and because he was talking shit," Justin said simply. "He was hurting you, he was hurting Brit, and he was hurting Josh, and it was all over shit that Lance really has no business talking about anyway." "True," I agreed. Lance was a virgin, after all. What business did he have arguing about sex, and whether it was right or wrong? "He just makes me so mad sometimes," Justin said, his hands balled up into fists. "I mean, he made Josh cry, and he made you cry. And he's always giving me shit, too, and once he even made Brit cry." "Her?" I asked. "She doesn't seem like the type." "She's not, usually," Justin said. "But he's always dropping these little side comments, and one day he was just harping and harping on her, and she started crying." "And you didn't punch him then?" I asked. "I wasn't there," Justin answered. "If I had been, I probably would have, but I was out talking to a reporter or something, and Chris and Josh had to scream at him to leave her alone. I thought Josh was going to strangle him. Gave him a long, loud lecture about being friends, and all of us being a family, and how Lance was being an ass." "I think that's what hurt Josh the most, actually," I said. "Not what Lance said, but that it was Lance who said it. You guys are important to Josh, and I think he felt betrayed more than anything else." "I kind of felt the same way," Justin said. "When I walked in and Lance was yelling at all three of you, something in me just kind of snapped, and I let him have it." "Did it make you feel any better?" I asked. "No," Justin answered bluntly. The directness and firm tone of his voice surprised me. "No, it didn't. Lance needs to be taken down a couple pegs. He walks around here like he's on this high horse, and he's always telling us what's right and wrong. You should hear him go after Chris with the smoking, and the models." "Models?" I asked. "There's more than one?" "Yeah," Justin answered, grinning, his whole face lighting up as he smiled. "Which one did you meet?" "Vlada?" I said, trying to remember if that was her name or not. "Tall girl, green eyes, foreign accent." "Yeah, that one's Vlada," Justin answered. "You met her this morning? That means tonight Chloe is over. I can't remember who else there is, but there's at least one more." I giggled. No wonder Chris kept to himself so much. He was probably exhausted. "Anyway," Justin said, dragging me back to the subject at hand. "Lance has been fucking with all of us for a while. He even tried to give Joey this lecture about gluttony being a sin, and Joey responded by ordering six pizzas while Lance was talking." I giggled again. I was really starting to like Joey. "Was he always like this?" I asked. "I mean, why would you guys even have him in the band if no one can get along with him?" "He didn't start out like this," Justin said, shrugging. I was so engrossed in the conversation that I'd more or less stopped noticing his attractive half-nakedness. "I mean, he was always very into church and stuff, and he read his Bible on planes a lot, but he never used to be such a judgmental prick about it. During this past tour, though, he's just been getting worse and worse, and it's driving us all crazy. It's most of the reason why we moved in here." "Most of the reason?" I asked, wondering what the rest was. "Well, Lance and Josh were the whole reasons, really," Justin admitted. "Josh was pulling away, and closing himself off, and at the same time Lance was just getting meaner and more self-righteous. For a while there we weren't sure if there was even going to be an album after this one." "I had no idea it had gotten that bad," I said. "Josh said there was some strain, but he didn't say it was anything like that." "I don't think he saw a lot of it," Justin said. "Lance wasn't bothering him. Anyway, all five of us sat down at the end of the tour, and we had a long talk about what we were going to do. We spent a little time doing our own projects, but we also decided that when we recorded the new album, we were going to do it together, and try get back some of that spirit we had when we first started out." "Has it worked?" I asked. "More or less," Justin answered. "I mean, Josh has really opened up, and he has you here. But Lance, he hasn't done anything except make things worse." "He seems like he might be trying to change," I admitted grudgingly. "Not fast enough," Justin said. Maybe it was just the light from the television, but his face looked almost cruel, twisted into an angry sneer. "But I'll help him along." I didn't want to stay and ask Justin what he meant by that. I suddenly felt uncomfortable, and wished that I was back in Josh's apartment, next to him in bed, where I felt safe. There were strange currents here, and I didn't want to get caught up in them. Whatever went on between Justin and Lance was their business, not mine. Maybe if I repeated it to myself enough times, I'd even start to believe it. "I think I'm gonna go turn in, Justin," I said, standing. "Sorry I got all serious there for a minute," Justin said, standing as well. He patted me on the shoulder. "Maybe tomorrow after we have that interview we should get together, maybe do something. Would you like that?" "Sure," I answered. "Ask Josh about it tomorrow, too." "I will," Justin said, smiling. "Good night, Jack." "Night, Justin," I said, turning to leave. I still felt strangely unsettled by the entire conversation. I felt even more unsettled when I got back to Josh's apartment. I jumped in the shower really fast to rinse the chlorine smell from the pool off of me, and then walked around the apartment, shutting lights off, as I toweled myself off. As I turned off the lamps in the living room, I noticed a shadow pass by the front window, next to the door. I peeked out from the side of the curtains, trying not to be seen, and saw Lance knocking at Justin's door. After a moment, Justin let him inside, and closed the door behind him. *** That's all for now. More to come soon, I promise.