Date: Wed, 28 Feb 2001 22:44:05 EST
From: Kb79@aol.com
Subject: Life's Discoveries, Chapter 9, boybands

DISCLAIMER: This story is a work of fiction. The characters are real
people but are being written in fictional situations. This is not
saying anything about the sexual orientation of anyone mentioned.

WARNING: This story deals with homosexual themes. If this offends you,
don't read. If you are under 18 years of age, don't read. If reading
this story causes you to break any laws, don't read.

FEEDBACK: I'd like to know what you think, email me at Kb79@aol.com

Life's Discoveries
Chapter 9
By: Kelly

It was the second morning at Nick's house and things weren't looking
good. The whole house was tense. At breakfast everyone was bitching. Kevin
was bitching about the couch. AJ was bitching about yesterday. Howie was
bitching about the breakfast. Nick was bitching about everyone being in his
house. Brian and Lance were the only ones being fairly quiet.

"I'm going to Rachel's today, unless anyone has a problem with that." Howie
announced.

"Are we ever going to start working on the new album?" Kevin said,
bitterly.

"We have been working for months straight, I think we can take a few days
off to just relax and enjoy life for a moment." Nick spit in Kevin's
direction.

"And if we all lived off of your work ethic, we'd be penniless singing in a
garage somewhere." Kevin replied harshly.

"And if we all worked the way you do, we'd all die before our time." Nick
returned without thinking.

Kevin went a little pale. "You... how... what..." Kevin stood up and left
the kitchen.

"Good job Nick, real good job." Lance said as he stood up and followed
Kevin out.

Nick smacked himself in the forehead. "Why don't I ever think before
speaking?"

Brian came over and sat with Nick. "Because you were angry, you and Kevin
have little fights like that all the time. You know that you both will be
over it soon."

Nick smiled up at Brian. "Thanks Frick."

"Anytime Frack." Brian smiled back. "You think you may be ready to have
that talk now?"

"Yeah, if you want to, that be cool." Nick stood up and began to clean up
the kitchen. "Just let me finish up in here first."

"Sure, here, I'll help." Brian offered. And the two of them straightened up
the kitchen before they went off to talk.

*On Nick's Back Porch*

Kevin sat on a lawn chair, staring out at the ocean watching Nick's boat
sway in the water.

Lance stood just outside the door.

"He didn't mean it. Not the way you think he did." Lance said, breaking the
temporary silence.

Kevin turned his head toward Lance. "I know. But coming from him..."

Lance paused as Kevin trailed off, waiting to see f he would complete the
thought. When he didn't, Lance said. "It hurts coming from him?"

Kevin nodded.

"Because he's one of the guys, right? And he should know better than that?"
Lance pondered.

"No... because..." Kevin began to explain. Bu the appropriate words just
wouldn't come to him. It wasn't as Lance thought. It wasn't because Nick
was one of his "guys". It was because... because...

Kevin fell silent for moment.  He figured it was now are never to tell
Lance of how he felt about Nick.  He looked back up at Lance. "How'd you
know when someone's the one?"

Lance looked at Kevin, mildly shocked.  It wasn't like Kevin to change
topic of conversation so quickly.  But if he would rather talk about this
now instead of Nick, it was fine with him.

"Well, some people believe it takes years and years to know if someone's
'the one'.  But then again, others think you can know in one glance."

"So, what if at first glance you knew someone was the one, but then you had
time to get know them, and it proved it all even more?"  Kevin asked.

"I guess that would be the perfect situation."  Lance smiled lightly.
'What was Kevin try to tell him?'  "Is there anyone specific you are
talking about?"

Was Lance finally understanding?  "Yeah, there is. You see, there is this
guy. He's a good deal younger than me, but it doesn't seem to matter. The
first time I met him, despite the fact he was still pretty much a boy, I
just seemed to know. And then, when I got to know him better, it just
seemed all that much stronger. I'm pretty sure I'm in love." Kevin tried to
explain.

'Does he mean me?' Lance thought excitedly to me.

"And lately, he's been there so much for me, going through this and all. It
just makes me love him more." Kevin continued.

Lance felt his face grow a little warm. 'He does mean me, doesn't he?'

"I just wish I knew what to do." Kevin mentioned.

"Well, Kevin, everything works out in time." Lance felt himself smile
slightly. 'Maybe sooner than you think Kev, maybe sooner than you think.'

"Thanks Lance, you always know what to say to make me feel better." Kevin
said to Lance, grabbing his shoulder slightly and giving it a friendly
squeeze.

"No problem Kev, anytime." Lance answered. 'Anytime, everytime.'

*In Nick's Office*

Nick and Brian had been talking for a while. It started off simple, what
new video game they wanted to buy, when they were going to go play
basketball next, but as it always did with the two of them, it changed to
something more serious. Brian was talking about Leighanne, and how
wonderful she was. Nick was talking about the changes he wanted to do in
the house and the repairs that needed to be done. Finally, the topic that
was in the back of both of their minds couldn't be ignored any longer.

"So you probably want to know what's up, huh?" Brian said softly to Nick.

"Yeah, if you're ready to talk about it." Nick answered.

"Okay, but under one condition, tell me what was wrong last night." Brian
offered.

"You mean the fight with Kevin?" Nick asked.

"Yeah."

"It wasn't anything really, I was just really tired and feeling kinda down
on myself. So when I came home, and immediately Kevin started to yell at me
like I was a 4 year old child, I just kinda snapped, nothing more than
that." Nick answered.

"Oh, okay. I shoulda known, you okay now?" Brian looked a little worried.

"Yeah, of course I am." Nick answered with a smile. "Big boy now,
remember?"

"Oh yeah, our little Nicky, all grown up, sure." Brian smirked.

Nick proved Brian's point by sticking out his tongue.

"So..." Brian started.

"So..." Nick mimicked.

"I'm surprised about this all... and it's a little disturbing... and it
completely goes against everything I has always thought was right. But to
tell you the truth, I really don't think it's the whole gay thing that's
bugging me." Brian delved into the subject.

"Really? All this hasn't been about Kevin being gay? Weird... What do you
think it is then?" Nick was a mixed of confused and relieved.

"I have a theory..." Brian mentioned.

"And that is?" Nick pressed.

"You know how Kevin and I grew up together, right?" Brian waited for Nick
to nod a yes. "Well... When I was little, I looked up to Kevin. Even more
than I looked up to Harold. He was like my hero, I was never sure why, but
I thought he was the coolest person in the world. I only wanted to do
things that Kevin did. Any sports, games, all stuff like that. I only
wanted to hang out with him and the people he knew. Now I know I was a
complete pain in his butt. He was always so cool about it. He even
convinced some of his friends to bring their little siblings so I would
have people my own age along. All I ever wanted was to be like Kevin."
Brian explained, sounding a little upset.

"That's not all that weird. Hell, Aaron used to imitate everything I did,
until he finally found his own person to be. I mean, it's not like you
still strive to be just like Kevin, you are your own person now." Nick
tried to console Brian.

"I don't know, I still think what Kevin would do before I make a big
decision. It still bothers me when I do something, and he is shocked, or
disappointed because it is something he would never do." Brian said, as he
lowered his head.

"I have an idea..." Nick said. Brian looked up at him. "Brian, here is
something you and Kevin will never have in common. This is the one way you
can never be just like Kevin. I think maybe that scares you a little,
because you were always able to define yourself by what your cousin did. I
think this may scare you and you may be taking this fear out on him, by
putting all that fear into hate towards his sexuality. It seems you are
right, this probably isn't all about him being gay."

"Maybe..." Brian said slowly. "Maybe you're right... but something still
seems off. I guess I still need to do a little more thinking."

"I'm glad we finally got to talk this all out Frick." Nick said.

"Me too, Frack." Brian smiled softly.

Nick grabbed his best friend into a hug and then they went off to see what
the rest of their group was up to.

The rest of the day was spent quietly for everyone. They all got together
for dinner, but it was nothing monumental. Everything was cleaned up and
the evening was still young.

"Wanna watch a movie? We may be lucky enough to find something good off the
satellite dish." Nick suggested.

"Sounds like a good idea." Howie agreed.

"Yeah, why not?" Brian smiled.

"I'm game." AJ threw in.

"How about you two?" Nick asked Kevin and Lance.

"Not me guys. I'm really tired for some reason, I'm going to turn in
early." Kevin answered.

"Alright. Goodnight Kevin." Nick answered, still a little coldly.

"Goodnight Nick, goodnight guys." Kevin replied, heading toward the
basement.

"Lance?" Howie asked. "You gonna watch?"

"Yeah, why not." Lance agreed.

The five men sat in the living room and turned on the television. After
some arguing they decided on The Patriot. Soon they were so engrossed in
the film, none of them noticed Lance sneak off for the basement.

"Kev?" Lance whispered as he climbed down the stairs.

He got no answer. Kevin was sprawled out on the pull out couch. He looked
like he was asleep. Kevin didn't look peaceful though, he was tossing and
turning, most likely attempting to find a way to get comfortable on the
awful couch.

Lance was about to walk away, when he heard Kevin mutter his name. He
looked back at Kevin to see if he was awake. He was.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" Lance asked softly.

"No... I was still awake. What's up? Everything okay?" Kevin sat up a
little.

"Yeah, things are okay. I just wanted to talk to you about something."
Lance mentioned, walking closer to the couch.

Kevin patted the couch next to where he sat. "Come here, tell me what's
up."

Lance walked over to Kevin and sat down. "I wanted to... you see... when we
were talking before..."

"Hey, whatever it is, just say it. We've always been honest to each other,
no need to hesitate over whatever it is." Kevin said kindly.

"Okay then." Lance smiled. Then he leaned over Kevin, gently pressing him
down on the bed. Before Kevin had the chance to react, Lance was forcing a
kiss on him. Smashing his lips down on Kevin's, forcing his tongue between
Kevin's lips.

The minute Kevin got his wits about him again he pushed Lance off him,
forcefully.

"What?" Lance looked confused.

"No...no..." Was all Kevin could say as he looked at Lance with a horrified
expression.

Suddenly Lance understood it all. Kevin never meant him. His eyes swelled
with tears and he ran from the room as they began to fall heavily.

"Lance!" Kevin screamed. But there was nothing he could do now.

"Nicky... God I need you now Nick." Kevin muttered before turning over on
his stomach and lightly weeping himself to sleep.