Date: Thu, 31 Aug 2000 22:37:06 GMT From: chris lerman Subject: My Broadway Romance: Chapter 2 My Broadway Romance by Chris Lerman * * * * * Disclaimer: This is a story that is pure fiction only. The sexual prefrences are unknown to anyone. If you are above the age of 18 please enjoy but if not please leave then. Well here it is people my second chapter. I have some people to thank that helped me with revisions and they are Schuyler, KB, and Jesssyka you guys are a great help to me. I also want to thank RCJ, K_Magic, Dayse and all the people on the chat room who gave me the courage to take this story and make it a reality. I have been very busy and I have ideas simmering in my brain and I will try to handle the story when I can I promise it will be steady but will take it's time. I love feedback so please please e mail me at chris_lerman@hotmail.com * * *Chapter 2* * * I did not know where my feet were taking me as I walked through the cold dark night. My head was spinning with a million thoughts and fears as what I was going to do without my Matt. The one love in my life was gone and yet he knew somehow that there will be someone to love me again and Cathy seemed to know this also. This was not the time to deal with that issue, I looked around at where I was and found I had made it to the Park and to the trail that Matt and I loved to walk together every night at sunset. I made it to a park bench and sat down in a heap and just lost it and started to cry and did not even notice someone calling my name... J.C.: Chris? Chris: Matt? I looked up with my tear stained face hoping it all had been a bad dream.. J.C.: It's J.C. Cathy told me where you were when I got there. Are you OK? I broke down when I heard what had just been asked of me Chris: I just lost the one true love of my life J.C! Matt was my whole world he was everything to me he helped me through when Joshy had Pnumonia and almost died, he kept me together more as I can say that I could have done for myself. I needed him and he left me when I needed him the most. But why? He was fine before a month ago? I will always love him with all my heart and soul J.C. when he was dying he told me that I will learn to love again the way that I had loved Matt. Cathy knows this too...is there something I need to know here J.C.? J.C.: Chris...Sweetie...You need to listen to what Matt told you, he's right but I can not say when and where it will happen...but it will happen I promise you that. Let's get you home and warmed up and into bed you have had a very hard night and you need to sleep. I gave J.C a look of panic about going back to where Matt was and J.C. picked up on this right away and took me into a warm hug J.C.: Sweetie, he is not there now. They came to get him after you left there is no need to worry about the arrangements they have been made. Matt wanted to be cremated so I took care of the paperwork before coming to look for you. We were walking on our way back home and J.C. was talking to me and I was just being able to make it out what he was saying to me in the state I was in I was not good for much of anything. J.C.: Chris it will be only me, you, and Cathy at the service...I also called your mom and she will be coming also. Chris: What about Matt's parents? Will they be there? I looked at J.C. and he got this pained look in his eyes and I saw tears in his eyes Chris: J.C. What is it? They will be there right? Talk to me? J.C.: Chris...Sweetie I think there is something that you should know about Matt that he should have told you a long time back...When Cathy and I first introduced you to Matt I was the only one who knew Matt was even gay...and you both fell in love and I kept telling him you should come out to his folks and tell them. Well that night he arranged for a dinner party for myself and them you were in school at the time and then he told them and when he did they just went nuts. They said they did not want him in their lives any more and they basically stormed out of there and when I did not move they said they would tell my parents but I did not care. When they left Matt broke down screaming and sobbing and I was there for him that night and ever since. He was my baby cousin and we did everything growing up together. He begged me not to tell you and I promised with a heavy heart and kept the secret until now. They are not coming to the service and I do not want them there even if they did show up! Chris: I can't believe he kept this from me all this time. But they are his parents why are they doing this? Mom would never do that to me I know but we are not all that lucky in life I guess. I thank you buddy for helping me and still being a part of my life. J.C.: I am never gonna leave you buddy. You are still family to me even if you guys did not get married. When he said this a warm smile came to me because I was lucky to have him in my life as a reminder that Matt was a part of him as he was to me. We had by this time reached the apartment and I stumbled inside and with the help of Cathy and J.C was helped into bed when sleep overcame me at last and I did not know anything until the next afternoon when I woke up. The next few days were a blank for me. Mom came as soon as J.C. had called her and she left Josh with Aunt Helen. I loved mom for the reason that if one of her babies were in trouble she'd drop everything and come to help out. Mom and Cathy basically helped take care of everything I was too out of to do, the cooking, the cleaning, things like that. The day of Matt's Service was a day I want to forget about but I knew that I had to be strong if not for J.C. then for Matt I knew he was watching from wherever he was and I also knew that I kinda knew what I wanted to say as a tribute to him because J.C. said I should say something because he was my lover and we were so close and he gave me the freedom to back out of it if it came to be too painful but it was my last good-bye to Matt and I was going to be strong and deliver it myself. I was weak with sobs and I do not remember much of what happened but as I remember going up to the mic and I started to talk Chris: Matt, wherever you are now I want you to know that I love you with all my heart and soul. I miss you, your laughter, your smile, the way you held me when I had a bad dream. We had our share of good and bad times didn't we sweetie? I will promise you always to go on living but it will be hard for me to move on without you. I know a lot of people miss you, I, mom, J.C., Cathy, and especially Joshy. He knows nothing of this and I do not know how I am going to tell him. I love you Matt and a lot of people know how happy we were together and that is very dear to me...I want you to know how much you have changed my life for the better and what the person you see before you now was not the same person back then. I thank you for that and I... I was overcome with grief by this time and even though I knew J.C, Mom, and Cathy were there for support I lost it completely and I was heaving inbetween long and painful sobs when I blacked out and collapsed on the floor and I remembered only saying one last good-bye to the one true love of my life and then nothing. I woke up the next morning and was told by Cathy that I was a wreck and was sobbing so badly that I had to be taken home and put to bed and then I remembered the last thing I did before I blacked out I had gone over to where Matt was lying and I brushed his face lightly and gave him a kiss on the lips one last time he was so cold and I knew then he was truly gone and then I lost it and there we are up to date. Cathy told me that Mom had to go home and pick Joshy up and that we will see them next week for opening night. It hit me what was I going to tell Joshy about Matt and me being gay? Mom and Cathy told me to wait until I was ready and strong enough and I agreed to do this. The Opening was drawing ever nearer and the preview period is where I was my brightest I knew every move and every line and was great, but on the home front I fell into a state of deep isolation and was a zombie I was not sleeping well, not eating well and was very moody and was not very stable either no one could reach me not mom, not cathy, not even Josh. But I was going to get a pleasant surprise though when Opening night came around. It came on a bright beautiful Saturday morning where the sky was a bright shade of blue, the birds were singing, and the sun was shinging and I woke up feeling all kinds of emotions and not knowing what to expect made my way into the bathroom and then onto the kithchen but then I heard voices and knew it had to be Cathy and J.C. I walked by but then heard my name mentioned and stood by the door on the outside listening to what was being said. Cathy: I don't know what to do J.C. He won't eat, he's not sleeping well, he goes into fits of crying when I'm not expecting it, and he hasn't called or seen Joshy in 3 whole weeks...maybe it is time to make our move tonight. Does he know anything yet? J.C.: No, he does not he is in the dark about it. He is as lonely as Chris is and also he needs someone like Chris to make him happy just like Matt made Chris happy...this is going to be great Cathy I am so excited and can not to see the look on Chris's face as well as his face. Cathy: Just make sure the guys are there on time for Act One Curtain and have him ready to know which one Chris is...I know they will be both very happy together. I kinda knew who they were talking about, and I knew because Matt was talking to someone on the phone and was being very secretive about a week or so before he died and also Cathy was acting very secretive when she was going out to talk with J.C. and I kinda put one and one together and I am glad that I had a pair of 2 crazy loving people to go setting me up again. Was it too soon? I'm not sure, but love happens to people when least expected as I was to find out in time. I promised Matt to love again and I knew this but it was going to take time and maybe it was pointless right now but I knew I had no control over who I fell in love with or the other way around. I gave a sigh and bounced into the kitchen all bouncy and chipper even though I was a mess inside but did not let them see it now was my time to shine and shine I was going to do. I was like Tigger which was my and Joshy's favorite Character. Chris: Good morning all! I am so looking forward to Opening and seeing Joshy and maybe have a certain surprise waiting for me tonight but who knows what that will be. Cathy: Hi Sweetie, glad to see you feeling better and yes you will have a great Opening night tonight but we have no idea of any surprise for you tonight do we J.C.? J.C.: No we sure do not Chris. I could see through their smiles and was feeling a warm glow and knew tonight was to change my life for the better forever and I know that Matt would be right with what he had made me promise the night he died. The rest of the day was spent getting ready running errands, getting gifts for the cast and all that sort of thing. Before I knew it it was time to go to the theatre and I was going to see everyone at Intermisison and at the end of the preformence. The Opening night was a sell out and when the part came for my solo part of "76 Trombones" I looked into the audience and saw Mom, Cathy, Joshy had wanted to sit on J.C.'s lap and they had been as close as Matt had been with him and then I saw 4 other guys sitting next to J.C. and one in paticular was watching my every move with keen interest and beaming from ear to ear and I knew it may be Justin and I fell in love on the spot on stage but was going to take it very slowly and not wanting to get hurt again I hope that Justin would understand this when it came time to meet and talk to him after the break. Who knew what was to happen in the months that followed. T.B.C.