My New Life
by James


 This story is the sole property of its author and may not be copied in whole or in part without  the  permission of the author.  The posting of this story on any web site must be with the author's prior knowledge and permission. 

This story deals with the fictional relationship between the members of the musical groups  *Nsync, Backstreet Boys (And who ever else shows up in the story.) and a male fan.   The sexual orientation of the members of *Nsync or the Backstreet Boys  are not known by the author and what is depicted in the story came from the imagination of the author.

If you are not 18 years old or it is illegal in your area to view such material please read something else.

Last Time:
Brit and Justin sat off in a corner enjoying what little time they had left to them.  When Brit's flight was called Justin  walked her to the lounge door.  Both were fighting back tears as they said their final good bye with a tender kiss.  Marc stood behind Justin as they watched Britney and her mom enter the jet way and disappear. 

Pulling Justin back against him Marc wrapped his arms around Justin's shoulders and gave him a hug.  "You all right," Marc softly asked.

Justin nodded as he let out a soft sob.  "Just hold me."

"Sure, bro.  What ever you need," Marc whispered as he tightened his hold on Justin.

Across the room Kevin watched Marc comfort Justin.  Kevin was awe struck at how effortless it was for Marc to show his love for Justin.  He could see there was a bond between the two of them, a bond that not many men could openly share. 

Justin watched Brit's plane take off all the time remaining in Marc's embrace.  With a sigh, 
Justin rubbed Marc's arm and Marc released him.

It was not long before the boarding call for the flight to Cincinnati was called.  Marc and Justin said their good byes with hugs.  Since the lounge was now empty Marc pulled Howie in for a big hug.  Not letting Howie go, Marc looked down into Howie's eyes.  "If you ever need to talk,   you've got my cell."

 "I'll call," Howie affirmed.

"You know I'm going to miss having you around," Marc said as his eyes started to water up.

"You and Lance have been the best friends I could have ever wanted," Howie said with a 
cracking voice.  "I'm going to miss you both."

Marc put a hand on the side of Howie's face and leaned in and gave him a tender kiss. 
Breaking the kiss Marc said, "That was from Lance."  With a wicked smile Marc leaned back in and kissed Howie again.  This time it was a deeper almost passionate kiss.  "That one was from me," Marc whispered.  "Remember that I will always love you my friend."

Howie beamed at Marc's declaration.  As Howie steeped back he hesitated.  Leaning back 
in he whispered into Marc's ear.  "Will you do me a favor?  Will you give Joey this and tell him thanks for last night."  Howie gave Marc a kiss to be delivered.

Marc was grinning when Howie stepped back.  "I'll see to it," Marc said.

Howie turned and headed for the door, along the way picking up his dumbstruck friends.

Chapter 43

Justin and Marc sat in the limo heading back to the hotel after leaving the airport.  Marc felt there was a definite tension in the air.  He knew Justin was hurting after having to say goodbye to Britney.  Marc had expected some reaction from him but his body language told Marc something else was bothering Justin.  Normally Justin would have sought him out for comfort; he liked to be held when he was upset, but Justin just sat on the other side of the limo quietly looking out the window.

Arriving at the hotel they took the elevator up to their floor.  As they walked down the hall a door opened and Lance steeped out. Lance met them part way down the hall, wrapping his arms around Marc's waist.  "Did everyone get off ok?" 

"Yeah, there was no problem," Marc said.

"Any problems with fans?"

"No.  The airport management gave us a private lounge to wait in," Marc said.

"Good.  And I'm glad you are back," Lance said giving Marc a quick kiss on the lips. 

Marc noticed Justin tense up when Lance kissed him.  A look of disgust flashed across Justin's face.

`Oh, no!' Marc thought.

As they reach the open door Justin paused for a second, "I'll see you guys later."

Lance gave Marc with a questioning look.

"Justin, can you come in for a minute?  There is something I need to go over with you."

Justin stopped and looked back hastily.  "It will just take a minute," Marc assured him..

Justin nodded and followed Lance and Marc into their suite.  Justin sat in a chair with his eyes downcast willing himself not to look at Marc.

Lance whispered, "What's going on?"

"I'm not sure," Marc softly said.  "But I think he is mad at me for something."  Marc and Lance took a seat on the couch across from Justin.  "Justin, what's wrong?"

Justin shrugged, "Nothing, I'm just a little down because Britney left."

"I figured that.  But something else is bothering you.  What is it?"

"Ah, nothing.  Just Brit leaving,"  Justin mumbled. 

"Bull shit!" Marc snapped.  "I think you didn't like the fact I kissed Howie good-bye."

Justin's eyes snapped up with surprise glancing from Lance, to Marc and back to Lance.

"You delivered my message?" Lance asked with a grin.

"Message?"  Justin questioned.

"Yeah," Lance said.  "I asked Marc to deliver a good-bye kiss to Howie and tell him how much we were going to miss him."

"You were delivering a message?"  Justin asked Marc.

Marc nodded.

"But what about the other kiss?"  Justin asked and immediately regretting his question.

Lance looked at Marc with a questioning raised eyebrow.

"The first kiss was from Lance," Marc started to explain.  "And the second kiss was my good-bye to Howie."

"But I heard you say something to Howie," Justin said uneasily.

"You heard that?"

Justin nodded.

Looking at Lance, Marc sighed.  "I told Howie to remember that I will always love him."

Lance smiled, "That was a nice thing to say."

"What!" Justin shouted as he jumped to his feet.  "I don't believe you, Lance.  Your boyfriend there just told another man that he loves him and you think that was nice."

Lance was a little surprised and amused at Justin's outburst.  Trying to keep a straight face Lance asked. Marc, "Is it true?  Do you love Howie?"

Looking at the floor he said, "Yes, I do love Howie."

"See!"  Justin said pointing a finger at Marc.

Crossing his arms Lance sternly asked, "Is there anyone else?"

Marc nodded, "I love Josh. . . . .  And Chris. . . . .   And Joey. . . .   And Justin."

"Is that all?"  Lance inquired.

Marc shook his head, "I also love my Dad and Sara"

"What about me?"  Lance asked.

"You?  I don't love you," Marc said as Justin fell back into the chair. "You, James, I am in love with."

Lance smiled as he leaned in and gave Marc a kiss on the cheek.  "I'm in love with you too."

Justin sat back totally confused.  "I don't understand."

"Justin, I trust Marc.  I know he loves me and he won't do anything to lose that trust."  Lance tried to explain.

"You have to understand that a gay relationship is a little different than a hetero relationship.  In your relationship with Britney there are some rules that you both follow," Marc said. "It is assumed that in a committed relationship there are certain things each of you will not do.  Like dating, you both agreed not to date anyone, right?"


"But yet you both go out with other people.  It's just when you go out it's with the guys and when Britney goes out it's with her girlfriends.  Why is it that way?"

"I don't know," Justin said.  "Because I'm committed to Brit I don't go out with another girl because I don't want to loose her."

"And it's the same way with her," Lance added.

"Justin, in a gay relationship it's a little different," Marc said.  "For one Lance and I are both the same sex."

"Well, duh!"  Justin uttered.

"Because of that, some of the rules change.  Since neither one of us are into girls, going out would mean going out with guys."

"And that's pretty much what happens," Justin agreed.

"And we enjoy going out with you guys.  And we understand that there are some rules we must go by when we do.  No public displays of affection and we have to watch ourselves on how we act around you straight guys."

"Yeah, watching you two suck face isn't that much fun."

"We realize that," Marc said.  "Because of having to watch ourselves so much when we can get together with another gay friend we tend to act a bit different."

"With Howie here we were a little freer," Lance said.  "We could be ourselves."

"Justin, Howie is a friend of mine," Marc said.  "He is a good friend and he is a gay friend."

"Because he is a gay friend is it all right to tell him you love him?  That doesn't sound like it's fair to Lance."

"Justin, I know how Marc feels about Howie.  I feel the same way about Howie.  It's just our love for him is different than the love we share."

"I really don't understand," Justin said shaking his head.  "So it's all right if Marc kisses Howie?"

"Yes, because I trust Marc.  Now if I find the two of them in bed having sex that is something different.  Justin, I have no problem with Marc and Howie kissing.  If I was the jealous kind, I would be more worried about Marc's feelings about you."


"Justin, Marc's feelings for you are very strong," Lance said.

"But, but I don't have those kind of feelings for him," Justin protested.

Shaking his head, Marc said, "Justin, the feelings I have for you are not the gay kind.  You are my little bro and I love you.  The bond I feel for you is just as strong as I feel for James.  And I know you feel the same way about me."

Justin sat with a frown.

"Justin, when you have a nightmare, who do you come to?"  Lance asked.

"Marc," Justin replied.

"And when you have a problem who is always there to listen to you?"

Justin sighed, "Marc."

"When Britney left tonight what did you need and where did you find it?"  Marc asked.

"I needed a hug, and you were there for me."

"Did you have to ask Marc for the hug?"  Lance asked.

"No.  Some how he knew what I needed and he was there for me."

"How would he know what you needed?"  Lance asked.

You could almost see the gears in Justin's head moving as he thought about Lance's question.  "He knew what I needed because he loves me?"

Lance nodded, "And the other day when Marc had his melt down and we all took turns holding him, why did you lay in bed holding him?"

"He needed me, he's my big bro, and I love him."

Lance and Marc sat back smiling at Justin.

"Oh!"  Justin said realizing for the first time his feelings for Marc.  "I do have feelings for Marc.  Does that make me gay?"

"No," Marc chuckled.  "The bond that we have is a brotherly love.  At least on my end; I've never had the urge to rip your clothes off of you and make mad passionate love to you."

"Oh, icky phooe!"  Justin said making a face.  "That doesn't sound at all like any fun."

Marc turned to Lance, "You don't think I'm icky phooe do you?"

"No dear, you definately don't fall into the icky phooe category for me.  Justin's just not into to man-to-man sex.  I do feel sorry for him; he doesn't know what he's missing."

"I'll just have to take your word for it," Justin said as he got up.

Marc got up and faced Justin, "Are we all right?"

Justin nodded, "We're good."  Justin pulled Marc into a tight hug.

"Justin, why did you hug Marc," Lance asked.

Justin smiled shyly, "Because I felt he needed a hug, and that's what brothers do."

Marc grinned, turning to Lance, "I think he's finally got it."

"Hey! I may not be the quickest one around here but I do catch on.  Eventually."

"You want to do anything tonight?"  Lance asked Justin.

"No.  I'm going to order room service and try to catch up on some of the sleep I've been missing.  Brit said she would call me after she gets settled in her hotel.  I'll wait for her call then call it a night."

"Okay," Marc said as Justin neared the door.  "Have a good night, well see you in the morning."

"Good night guys, I love you both," Justin said then hesitated.  "That is I love you both in a non-gay way."  Justin grinned at them then ducked as Marc threw a pillow at him.

"Get out of here!" Marc yelled as Justin dashed out the door.

The flight back to Orlando was a long one, almost five hours long.  Luckily first class was only half filled and the Backstreet group had the front of the cabin to themselves.  Brian and Leighanne dozed in their second row seats.  Howie stared out the window looking out over the solid expanse of fluffy clouds, colored now with the brilliant reds of the setting sun.  In no time Howie knew the view would change to the approaching starlet night.  As the sky grew darker the window started to pick up the reflection of the cabin.  A slight smile spread across Howie's face as he noticed that Kevin had been watching him.

Still gazing out the window, Howie sighed, "Kevin, go ahead and ask your question."

Kevin jumped slightly, not expecting Howie to say anything.  "I ah, ah, I was just wondering.  Is there something going on between you and Marc?"

Grinning, Howie turned to Kevin, "There is, but not what you're thinking."

Kevin frowned.  "Kevin, he is just a really good friend."

"How good?"  Kevin asked.

"Probably the closest friend I've had outside the group in a long time."

"He is pretty good looking," Kevin observed.

"Good looking!  Shit he has to be the hottest guy I know," Howie said his voice rising a little.

"Keep it down," Kevin softly admonished.

"Sorry.  It's just Marc is so hot.  Lance is the luckiest guy in the world."

"If he is so hot, you going to try to get him for yourself?"

"The thought did cross my mind," Howie affirmed.  "But it wouldn't be any use trying.  Marc is so in love with Lance there wouldn't be any way to break those two up."

Kevin nodded his understanding.  "What about Justin?  He seems real close to Marc.  Is there something going on there?"

"You mean what happened at the airport?  Yes, there is something there.  Justin is probably as close to Marc as Lance, but in a non-sexual way.  The two of them kind of adopted each other as brothers."

"I was amazed how Marc knew Justin was hurting after Britney left.  A simple thing like a hug and holding him seemed."

"Those two have a unique relationship.  I've seen them have a whole conversation without saying a word.  Justin would want to do something and if Marc thought it might not be a good idea the two of them would exchange looks and you knew Justin was pleading with Marc.  And most of the time Marc would win the argument."

"Not always?"

"No," Howie chuckled.  "Sometimes Marc would give in and let Justin have his way."

"What about his relationship with the others?  Is it just as strong or have the three of them formed their own clique?"

"Marc's relationship with the others is a close one, but each is a little different.  I think if Marc needed a kidney transplant, all five of them would be lining up to donate one."

"Marc does hold an unique spot in *Nsync.  I wouldn't have thought anyone could have broken into that close-knit group.  I guess being Lance's boyfriend helped a lot."

"Not the way the others tell it," Howie said with a shake of his head.  "They had gotten to know Marc during their vacation break and he clicked with each of them.  He and Lance didn't get together until they had known each other for a couple weeks."

Kevin thought for a long time.  "It may never have occurred to them that Marc may have been using them to get a musical career off the ground."

"You can't be more off base," Howie said.  "Marc is making a name for himself in his own field of music."

Kevin frowned, "What field?"

"Well, while on tour this summer with *Nsync, Marc appeared on a PBS television special where he conducted and preformed two of his original symphonic compositions.  Then a couple weeks later he appeared as guest conductor with the Boston Pops."

Kevin was a little surprised at what Howie told him.  "But with the voice he has, I thought he would be going after a vocal career.  He has the voice that could make it big as a solo artist, with the right management. . . . . .  He does have a manager, doesn't he?"

Howie nodded, "Justin's mom is managing him."

"I kind of thought Lance would have tired signing him up," Kevin chuckled.

"They're both smart enough to know it is not a good idea to have your lover as your manager.  Marc's happy with Lynn."

Kevin nodded contemplating what Howie told him.  "D, if Marc and Lance are so tight why did he kiss you tonight?"

Howie smiled, "He was delivering a message from Lance that included a kiss."

"And the other kisses?"

"That was Marc's good-bye kiss.  And the last one was my reply."

"Oh, okey," Kevin said with a shrug.  Leaning back in his seat Kevin sighed and closed his eyes.

Howie turned out the overhead light and looked out into the night sky.  A smile came across his face as he remembered how Marc looked in the shower.  `Damn, he is so hot,' Howie thought.  Reaching down he made a slight adjustment to his very hard cock.

"What do you want to do tonight?"  Lance asked.

"How about we order room service, have a long hot bath, and see what comes up?"  Marc suggested with a grin.

"Oh, yeah!"  Lance said.

"Ah, James, I need to do something first," Marc said getting to his feet.  "Why don't you order room service while I talk to Joey about something."

"Sure, hurry back," Lance said as he picked up the phone.

Joey was watching TV when there was a knock at his door.  Going to the door he looked out the peephole to see who his caller was.  Smiling he opened the door, "Hey, Marc.  What's up?"

"Hey, Joe.  I just needed to talk to you for a minute," Marc said as he entered Joey's room.

Closing the door, Joey turned to find Marc standing in the middle of the room.  "Have a seat.  What's on you mind?"

"Joe, I won't be here that long.  I'm here to deliver a message."

"A message?"  Joe asked with a frown.  "Who from?"

Stepping up to Joe Marc smiled and softly said, "It's a two part message from Howie."

Joey's face broke into a smile.  "Really?"

"Yeah, the first part is he wanted to thank you for last night.  And the second part was this," Marc placed a hand on Joey's cheek and leaned in and gave Joe the kiss. 

When Marc pulled back he almost broke out in laughter at Joey's expression.  His eyes were bugged out and a blush quickly reddened his face.

"I ah, I ah, oh boy," Joe stammered.

"It's all right, Joe.  I'm not going to ask what the message meant," Marc said as he turned to leave.

A hand grabbed Marc's arm.  "Ah, Marc.  Please don't go.  I need to talk to you about Howie."

Marc sat down on the end of the bed looking up at Joe.  Marc could see the conflict on Joe's face.  Patting the bed beside him Marc said.  "Joe, have a seat and tell me what's on your mind."

Sitting next to Marc, Joe looked for a long time at his hands.  "I just want to explain about Howie's message."

"Joe, you don't have to explain anything to me," Marc protested.

"I know.  But I want to tell you about last night," Joey said nervously.

"Joe, did something happen between Howie and you last night?"

"No, not really," Joe said with a sigh.  "Howie was having a problem sharing the suite with Brian and Leighanne.  He came knocking at my door and asked if it was all right if he came in and talked for a while. . . .  You know the kind of room I had.  There was only one chair and the bed so we ended up sitting on the bed and talked."


"We talked for hours," Joe said. "I found out more about Howie last night than I'd ever thought I would know.  He talked about his family and the beginning of Backstreet.  And I told him about my family and *Nsync.  The more we talked the more relaxed we both became with each other."

Marc smiled at Joe.  "Joe, how do you feel about Howie?"

"I like him," Joe said with a touch of hesitancy.  "A lot."


"I'm just not sure Marc.  I want us to be friends but I'm not sure if he feels the same way."

"Well by the second part of his message I think he wants to be friends," Marc pointed out.

"I'm afraid that Howie is interested in me because Brian just dumped him and he is looking for someone to take his place."

Marc looked at Joe for a long time.  "That's not what you're really afraid of, is it?"

Joey looked at his hands in his lap.  "I, I'm afraid he will want something more then just be friends."

"Joe, did Howie go back to his room last night?"

"Ah, . . .  No.  We both started yawning.  And I suggested we get some sleep."

"Did he share your bed?"

"Yeah, we slept in the same bed.  But nothing happened!"

Shaking his head Marc said, "Joe, I didn't think anything would happen.  I assumed you guys slept in your underwear."

Joe nodded.

"And I bet you both started out on your own side of the bed."

Joe nodded again.

"But the two of you didn't stay that way for long?"

The blush rose in Joe's face as he nodded.

Marc had to chuckle at Joe's reaction.  "Joe, I know you and I know Howie.  One of the things you that you both have in common is that you both like to cuddle.  Did you have any problem with Howie next to you?"

"No.  In a way I kind of liked it."

Marc smiled, "It is a nice feeling to have someone next to you.  I know I like it the night you shared my bed at the cabin.  You are so nice and easy to cuddle to."

"You liked it did you?"  Joey grinned.

"Hey, don't get to full of yourself.  Justin and Lance are also cuddlers.  I think in the same situation all of you guys would be cuddlers"

Joey smiled at the idea of everyone in one bed cuddling.

"Joe, when you and Howie cuddle, it means that you are comfortable with each other.  And you trust each other.  And right now it means a lot that Howie can trust you.  He was hurt by Brian's actions.  And to be able to trust that you would not hurt him, is a big step."

"I don't want to ever hurt him," Joe said.

"I know you won't," Marc assured him.  "And I sure Howie knows that too."

Joey grew quiet.  "Marc, what if Howie wants to be more than just friends?"

"That scares you doesn't it Joe?"

Joey nodded, "I'm not sure if I could give him what he wants.  He's so experienced, I don't know if I could live up to Brian's abilities."

"Joe, Howie doesn't want another Brian.  Right now he wants a friend that he can trust.  Someone he can talk to.  Someone that makes him feel good about himself and also someone to care about." 

"I do care about him.  But."

"But what?"

"I'm not sure about kissing another guy."

Marc was perplexed.  "Joe, we've kissed."

"I know.  But it was a brotherly kiss.  I'm just not sure if I could do the other kind of kissing.  I'm not sure if I'd enjoy that kind of kiss.  I'd hate for Howie to be disappointed.  And I'm not sure about the sex part."

"I'm sure if your friendship reaches that point, you will do all right."

"But what if he wants to fuck?  I'm not sure I can do it."

"Joe, fucking is only a small part of making love.  As you get to know Howie better you will discover what pleases him and he will also discover what pleases you.  Believe me when two people follow the path of discovering what pleases each other you would be amazed at what you find."

"How long did it take you and Lance to reach that part?"  Joe asked.

"What?  Fucking?"

Joey nodded.

"We haven't yet.  We're both still virgins in that respect."

Joey was shocked, "But I thought.  >From what we could hear."

"That we were doing the nasty?  No, not yet."

"But I thought that's what gay sex is all about."

"For some guys it is.  But that is only a sex act.  What Lance and I do when we are together is make love to each other.  And we have found some very hot ways of doing that."

"Will you ever do it?"  Joey asked.

"When we both are ready, I'm sure we will.  But that is not our main focus.  We love each other and we have our ways of showing it that is gentle and very erotic."

"I think I understand," Joey said. 

"Joe, what and how you and Howie make love is something the two of you must discover."

Joe nodded.  "So I shouldn't worry about it until it comes up."

"Right.  Joe, right now Howie needs a friend.  Work on your friendship and don't worry about the other.  You will know when it's time to move to the next level."

"Thanks Marc.  I feel better about Howie."

"I'm glad I could help," Marc said as he got up to leave.

Getting up to walk Marc to the door Joey touched Marc's arm again.  "Marc, can I ask just one more favor?" 

Turning to Joe Marc said, "Sure."

Joey reached to Marc, placing a hand on his face as he leaned into him.  Their lips met in a kiss.  Joey deepened the kiss as he felt Marc respond to him.  Tentatively probing Marc's lips with his tongue, Marc's lips parted admitting Joey.  As the kiss deepened Joey pulled Marc to him pressing their bodies together.  Marc's arms came up around Joe's shoulders as his tongue slid into Joe's mouth.

Joey felt a tingle come over him as he felt Marc respond to his kiss.  `Oh, god, yes!'  Joey thought then abruptly broke the kiss.  "Oh, shit!  Marc I'm so sorry.  I didn't mean for it to go so far."

Placing a finger on Joey's mouth Marc stood there trying to catch his breath.  "Joe, don't!  I knew what you were doing.  You needed to know."  Regaining his composure, Marc gave Joey the look over.  "I don't think you have to worry about if how you and Howie will respond to each other.  You will do just fine."  Marc looked at the bulge in Joey's shorts and smiled.  "Yes, you will do just fine."

Adjusting himself as he turned to leave Marc said, "Good night, Joe."

"Night, Marc.  See you in the morning."

Marc arrived back at his room just as room service was arriving.  After tipping the waiter, Marc closed the door and turned to Lance.

"Marc, you are all flushed.  Did something happen?"  Lance asked.

Pulling Lance to him Marc kissed him deeply.  "I'll tell you all about it while we are soaking in the tub.  Let's not let our meals get cold."

It was early; light could be seen peaking in around the closed drapes of the bedroom.  Lance and Marc were snuggled together still deep in slumber.  The door slowly opened and a head peered in.  The door opened more as the figure crept toward the sleeping pair.  Violent movement of the bed brought both sleeping men wide awake. 

"What the hell," Marc shouted.

"Come on guys.  Time to get up," Justin said as he jumped up and down on their bed.

"Justin, stop bouncing!"  Lance shouted. 

Justin stopped bouncing landing between Lance and Marc.

"Why are you here," Marc demanded.

"I'm here to get you two guys up,"  Justin said with a grin.

"Why?" Lance asked.  "Today is a free day.  We don't have to get up early."

"You do if we are going to get there early enough."

"Get where?"  Marc asked as he laid back.

"We're in L.A., right?  We can go to Disneyland," Justin bubbled happily.

Marc and Lance looked at each other and grinned.  "Yeah," they both said.

"Then you agree Disneyland is a good idea?"

"Yeah it is a good idea," Marc said.  "Why don't you get everyone else up."

"I already have.  You two were the last ones to get up."

"Why don't you go order breakfast while we get dressed," Lance suggested.

"Already did that," Justin stated not moving from the bed.  Not saying anything Marc and Lance stared at Justin.  "Oh, you guys want me to leave.  Cause you two don't have anything on, do you?"

"You got it," Marc said giving Justin a push.  "Get out of here so we can get dressed."

"Okay," Justin said as he headed into the other room.  "Just don't take all day."

Justin dashed out of the room as two pillows came flying at him.


Other stories I have on Nifty
Route 66 Rocks
Infinite Love
A Step Out of Time

 Feedback is always welcome. 

Contact James