Date: Sun, 23 May 1999 15:13:23 BST
From: Matthew Morris <matt_morris_uk@hotmail.com>
Subject: NSYNC Heartache

NSYNC Heartache

by Matt Morris

Warning This story contains a brief sexual act between consenting men, and
if you are not legally entitled to read such material you ought not read
it.

This story is not intended in any way to imply that any of the real people
are actually gay and it is not my intention to offend anybody. If you find
the idea of some of the NSYNCers being gay offensive then I suggest that
you read no further. When someone is as gorgeous as Lance Bass however it
is nice to dream.

Chapter 1.

	Mark was walking along new street trying to avoid the rain.
Foreigners were renowned for complaining that it rained too often in
Britain, but Birmingham got even more rain than the rest of the country. He
ducked into HMV and headed to the albums. He was going to an NSYNC concert
the next day with Catherine and he thought he would get their album so that
he at least knew some of the tunes.
	About a year earlier it had emerged that he was gay. Mark wasn't
particularly bothered that people knew, he had just never felt the need to
make it public. It was in some ways a relief, but he was terrified that his
parents would find out. While he was certain that they would be supportive,
he also knew that it would destroy them. Ever since the door had fallen
from his closet, Mark had found himself dragged out on a regular basis by
Catherine. Whenever there was going to be a boy band in Birmingham she
dragged him along. Her boyfriend was delighted as it meant that she could
go to the concerts in company, but that he didn't have to go. In all
honesty Mark quite enjoyed it as well. On the whole he liked the music and
Catherine was great company with a bubbly personality and a smile to die
for. He just complained for fun.
 	Mark didn't really know much about NSYNC, He had heard that they
were similar to the Backstreet Boys which suited his tastes fine. Although
he was fiercely patriotic in most respects, Mark was honest enough to admit
that the American boy bands were on the whole better at singing than their
British counterparts.
	As he came out of the door, Mark noticed something which struck him
as odd. Sitting on a bench in the pouring rain with his head in his hands
was a young man who appeared to be about the same age as Mark. There was a
crack of thunder, and the rain started to pour down even more heavily, but
still he just sat there. Mark was worried, he never liked to see people sad
and here was someone who seemed to be totally oblivious to anyone and
everything and the fact that he was in grave danger of a cold at the very
least. Mark walked towards him, and as he got closer he could hear sobs. He
sat on the bench next to the wretched figure and said, 'Its probably not as
bad as it seems you know.' he got no response and he decided to try again,
'I'm Mark' The young man looked up, but he looked straight ahead rather
than at Mark. Mark was struck by how stunningly attractive he was, spiky
blond hair and eyes to die for. Then he spoke, an American accent which
surprised Mark a little and despite the sadness it had a rich deep tone
which sent a shiver up his spine. 'You'll make yourself ill if you sit
there in the wet you know.' he said. Mark looked at him and said, 'I guess
we can keep each other company at the doctors then. I'm Mark, I'm sorry I
didn't catch your name.' The young man looked up and quietly said
'Lance'. Mark was lost in his eyes which were a delicate shade of grey and
drew his gaze deep into them. 'I'm sorry.' he said. 'My name, it's Lance.'
the young man said.
	Mark looked at him and said, ' So Lance what's so bad that you have
to sit here in the rain and cry about.' Lance looked at him and said, 'It's
sort of personal, I don't ...' 'Its okay, I just thought it might be easier
to tell someone you don't know' Mark said, 'So what brings you to
Birmingham?' Lance thought for a few minutes before saying, 'I'm just here
for a few days with some friends. What about you?' 'I'm a student at the
university.' Mark replied. The two of them sat and talked for about an
hour, during which time the rain had stopped. While talking they had got to
know each other quite well and it was surprising how much they had in
common. Lance had been thinking about what Mark had said about talking to
someone he didn't know, and he decided that he did know Mark well enough to
talk to him, but as they would probably never see each other again anyway
he was less concerned about him getting angry and never wanting to speak to
him again. 'Mark, you know what you said earlier about talking to someone I
didn't know.' 'Yeah' Mark said, 'If there's anything you want to say, don't
worry about it, just say it.'
	Lance looked at Mark, and saw him watching intently. Lance could
see the concern in his eyes and started to speak 'The problem is Mark that
I'm ... I'm ... I'm g..g..' Mark could see the tears running down his
cheeks and he placed an encouraging hand on his arm. He knew what Lance was
trying to say, and he knew that if he were going to come to terms with it
he had to say it himself without being pushed into it. Lance felt the hand
and drew strength from it. Taking a deep breath he managed to say, 'Mark,
I'm gay.' before he started crying again. Mark put his arm around his
shoulder and gave him a hug. sensing that there was more to come however he
sat next to Lance with an arm about his shoulder. Lance continued, 'This
morning we went into Justin's room to wake him. He's usually the last to
wake up so we were surprised that he wasn't in bed then he came out of the
bathroom wearing absolutely nothing. I mean I always knew that he had a hot
body, but he was obviously excited about something. Anyway he saw me
staring at him because he said "hey Lance baby, you seein something you
like." anyway the others all started to laugh at me. I can't remember if I
said anything but I just left the hotel, and now they all know and they
hate me.' Looking off into space Lance saw a tourist with a camera, but
with the things running through his mind he wasn't thinking straight and he
panicked thinking that it was a journalist who might get the wrong idea
about him and Mark. Jumping up he started to run but in his haste he didn't
see the taxi coming. Mark shouted but was too late, the taxi driver was
slamming on his brakes but he still hit Lance and sent him flying. Mark ran
over to where Lance lay, instinctively reaching for his mobile as he
went. By the time he reached the unconscious body he had dialled 999 and
requested an ambulance. As he knelt by Lance holding his bleeding head in
his lap the driver of the taxi came up. There was no way that he could have
stopped, the roads were wet and Lance had shot out in front of him from
nowhere.
	A few minutes later the ambulance arrived and the paramedics got
Lance into the back of it. Bending down to scoop up Lance's mobile Mark
jumped in just before the doors closed. 'Which hospital are we going to?'
Mark asked. The paramedic looked up and said, 'Selly Oak, the A38's the
only road that's not dug up at the moment.'  'Is it alright if I use this?'
Mark asked indicating Lance's mobile. The paramedic nodded before returning
to Lance's injuries. Running through the numbers programmed into the phone
Mark found a name he recognised from their conversation, Justin. Mark
remembered the conversation and wondered if Justin was the right person to
call, but it was the only person he knew to even be in the same
country. Pressing the call button he drew a breath.
	Back in the hotel Justin's phone rang. Grabbing it he recognised
the number and pressing to receive he shouted 'Lance, where are you, JC and
Chris are looking for you and Joey's having kittens...' Mark interrupted
him, 'Justin, you don't know me, my name is Mark. Lance has been in an
accident.' pausing to allow the news to sink in he continued, 'Lance is
being taken to Selly Oak hospital, you want the casualty department. okay.'
Justin was silent for a few seconds before replying , ' We'll be there,
thank you.' Turning he saw J.C. standing in the doorway. Without waiting
for the question he said, ' Lance is in hospital, you get Joey and Chris
and I'll arrange a taxi.

	Noone spoke during the ride to the hospital. They were all worried
for Lance, and with the exception of a few ideas flashing in and out of
Justin's head nobody knew why he had disappeared that morning. Hopping out
of the taxi Justin just handed a few notes to the driver and ran after the
others. He still wasn't used to the notes and he didn't want to hang around
to work it out. JC. went straight to the desk and said, 'Excuse me, we're
here to see Lance Bass, we understand he was brought here.'  The woman
looked up and said, 'There was a Lance brought in, he was hit by a car. The
man who came in with him didn't know his last name, or any details. Does
your friend have blond spiky hair?' 'Yes' Justin said, 'Look you said
someone came in with him.' 'Over there.' the woman said pointing to Mark
who was sat in a corner thinking. Justin said to JC. 'you fill them in on
his details and I'll go find out what happened.' He walked over to the
corner where Mark sat and said, 'Excuse me. Mark?' Mark looked up and
immediately did a double take. Standing in front of him was a face he
recognised from the cover of the NSYNC album. 'Your one of them aren't
you?' he asked realising as he said it how stupid he must sound. Justin
looked at him in surprise. 'Which other Justin would be here with Lance?'
he asked cursing himself for being so abrupt. 'I'm sorry' he said, 'I'm
just worried about Lance.' Mark looked up and said, 'I didn't recognise
him, he looks so much different to the album cover.' Justin and Mark talked
for a bit about what had happened. Mark outlined the events taking special
care not to mention the topic of the conversation. Justin realised that he
wasn't hearing everything, and he said, 'What were you talking about that
made him just run off?'. Mark was uncomfortable because he didn't want to
lie to Justin, but he was saved by a doctor coming over and saying, 'Mr
Bass regained consciousness a while back and he has been answering some
questions so that we could ascertain the extent of his injuries. I'm
pleased to say that apart from some bruising and a minor knock to the head,
Mr Bass was not seriously hurt and he should be able to participate in
tomorrow's concert as long as he doesn't over exert himself. I would
however like him to stay here overnight so that we can keep an eye on him
to make sure that there are no serious problems. Oh he was asking if there
was a Mark here.' Mark looked over and could see that Justin looked
upset. 'Don't worry,' he said, 'He probably doesn't know you're here. I'll
go and tell him. I'm sure he'd far rather talk to you than me.' It was with
some relief that he followed the doctor. He had hated concealing things
from Justin, but he didn't feel that he should be the one to tell them
about Lance, and despite Lance's earlier fears, Mark was quite certain that
Justin didn't know.
	When Mark walked into the room Lance was gazing out the window, and
Mark slowly walked over to the bed and said, 'feeling any better?' Lance
looked round and said, 'Mark, the doctor said there was someone waiting and
I thought it must be you.' Mark replied 'your friends are here, they're out
in reception.' Lance looked up again, 'They came? I didn't know if they
would.' Mark laughed and said, 'I don't think they have any idea. Justin
didn't seem to know.' Lance said,' You didn't tell him did you?' seeing
Mark shake his head he continued, 'I want to tell them, would you mind
being here when I tell them?' 'Of course I wouldn't. I'll go and fetch
them.'
	Mark stood at the back of the room but made sure that Lance could
easily see him so that he knew he wasn't alone. Lance took a deep breath
and said, 'I have something to tell you all. I'm Gay.' He was about to
carry on, but was silenced by the rapid departure of Justin. JC. was about
to run after him but Mark said, 'wait I'll go. You all have a lot to
discuss and there might be some harsh words needed. If Justin takes it
badly it would be better for him to hate me than any of you.' JC squeezed
his shoulder and then went to sit next to the bed. Chris and Joey were
still too shocked to say anything. After searching the hospital for almost
an hour Mark found Justin sitting in a corner of the cafeteria crying. When
he first left Lance's room he had been livid that Justin could just walk
out on a friend, but as he had been walking round the hospital he had
started to get worried. When he saw Justin crying he felt for him, and
sitting opposite him he reached out and took his hand and said, 'he's still
the same person you know.' Justin looked up and said, 'When you saw him
this morning you didn't know who he was did you?' Mark laughed before
saying 'No. He looked a lot different to the picture on the album. You are
the only one who you would recognise without knowing.' A thought occurred
to Justin and he looked at Mark with a distinctly worried expression. 'You
won't tell anyone about Lance will you?' he asked. Mark looked at him,
slightly hurt, and said 'never.' Justin looked out the window and said,
'When I ran out, it wasn't that I love Lance any less, he's like a brother
to me and he always will be, its just that I'm gay, and I've had a crush on
Lance for ages. When he said that he was gay it came as a shock. You don't
think that he's going to hate me do you.' Mark smiled, 'Never. The biggest
worry Lance had this morning was that you guys would hate him. I think you
just need to go in there and tell him that you still love him. It might
help if you told them all how you feel. I think that at the very least you
should tell Lance.' 'I will, but I don't know if I can tell the others
now. Will you be there when I tell him?' 'If you want' 'Thankyou. You were
saying about the pictures on the album. I can get you some tickets to the
concert tomorrow if you would like, maybe some backstage passes.' 'I was
already coming to the concert, but if you could get me a couple of
backstage passes Catherine would go wild.' 'Who's Catherine? your
girlfriend?' Mark laughed uncontrollably for a few minutes before
recovering, 'She's just a friend, a very good friend but a friend.' 'So
have you got a girlfriend at the moment?' Justin asked. 'No. I'm not really
a girl guy, at least not like that.' 'You mean your gay right?' Justin
said. 'Yeah, just don't spread it around' Mark said before continuing more
light heartedly 'Why whats it to you. You some queer bashing redneck or
something?' Justin laughed. 'So you don't like people to know' Mark
considered for a moment before saying, 'I don't mind people knowing, I just
don't feel the need to tell people.' 'Cool' was all Justin had time to say
before they arrived back in Lance's room.
	JC jumped up as they entered the room. 'Hey Justin, are you
alright?' 'Yeah fine. Can you leave us for a minute please.' JC paused for
a minute before nodding and heading to the door followed by Joey and
Chris. Looking back he saw Mark standing at the foot of the bed while
Justin stood at the side holding Lance's hand. JC started to talk, 'Mark'
but Justin interrupted him, 'No, JC, I asked Mark to stay.' JC frowned but
went to join Joey and Chris in the waiting area. Justin just stood there
holding Lance's hand for about five minutes before starting to
speak. 'Lance, about earlier. I'm sorry for running out on you like
that. When you told us it startled me. Lance I want you to know that
nothing you could say would ever stop me from loving you. You're like a
brother to me and I don't want to lose you.' Lance lay there tears running
down his cheeks. Justin didn't know what to make of it. Seeing his
confusion Lance said, ' It's alright Justin, I thought I'd lost you. I'm
just so glad you're still here for me.' 'Lance, there's something else. I
never had the courage, the courage you showed earlier, to tell any of you
this. Lance I'm gay as well. I was afraid to say anything because I thought
you all might reject me. It's just I'm not ready to tell the others yet.'
'Its alright Justin, we can tell them when your ready to.' 'Thanks
Lance. There's just one other thing.' Mark knew what Justin was about to
tell Lance, and he didn't feel comfortable being in the room to hear it. It
was something personal between the two of them, and Mark decided it was
time for him to step out. 'I'll just go and see how the others are.'
	Walking into the waiting area Mark spotted Joey sitting on his
own. Walking over he said, 'Where are JC and Chris' 'They went to get
something to drink. What was wrong with Justin.' 'Nothing, he was just
taken by surprise. He's in there talking to Lance now.' 'I know how he
felt. When Lance told us I didn't know what to say or think. I hope he
realises that we still love him.' 'He does now.' 'I want to thank you
Mark. Lance told us what happened this morning. I don't know what would
have happened if you hadn't been there for him.' 'Hey, I guess I'm just a
sucker for people in tears.' At this point JC and Chris walked up and sat
down next to Mark and Joey. JC looked at Mark and said, 'Mark, I want you
to know that we're very grateful for everything you've done for Lance, but
I have to ask this, do you know who we are.' 'I do now, but I didn't know I
saw Justin.' seeing that JC looked confused Mark took the cd out of his
rucksack and pointed to the pictures on the front. 'They're not exactly
flattering any of you. Justin's about the only one who's recognisable.' JC
laughed and showed the cd to Chris who laughed and said 'Did we really look
like that, what were we thinking?' JC handed the cd back to Mark and said,
'I know this probably sounds bad but I have to ask you to promise not to
tell this to anyone.' 'You have my word.' Mark replied. 'Is there anything
we can do to thank you.' JC asked, 'We can get you tickets for the concert
if you would like.' 'Its alright, I already have tickets, and Justin has
already said that he would get me some backstage passes.' Mark replied. JC
said 'Good. How can we contact you to let you know where to collect them.'
Mark gave JC his phone number and they sat chatting for a bit.
	Meanwhile back in Lance's room Justin had plucked up the courage to
finish his confession to Lance. Holding firmly onto Lance's hand he said,
'Lance, it's not just that I'm gay. Ever since we met I've had a major
crush on you.' Lance didn't say anything, but sitting up he pulled Justin
to him and started to kiss him. As their tongues danced in their mouths
Lance started to fumble with Justin's belt and then the buttons on his
jeans. Reaching out he slid his hand into Justin's boxers and rubbed his
hand over Justin's hard member. At that moment they both pulled back and
simultaneously said, 'I'm sorry. I can't do this.' Looking into Justin's
eyes Lance said, 'I'm sorry Justin, I can't get over thinking of you as a
brother. I just can't do this.' Justin leaned over, kissed Lance on the
forehead and said, 'It's ok Lance. I feel exactly the same way.'
	Back in the waiting room Mark looked at his watch and swore. JC
looked up and said, 'What's wrong?' 'It's 5 o'clock already. I have to
go. I'll just go and say goodbye to Lance and Justin' 'Right. We'll see you
tomorrow then.' JC said. Chris and Joey were both asleep. Walking through
to Lance's room Mark was sure that he saw Justin doing up his belt but he
felt it better not to say anything. 'I'm off home.' he said. Lance looked
up, 'Mark, I don't know how to thank you. I understand we'll be seeing you
again tomorrow.' Justin said, 'That's a point, how should I contact you
about the passes.' 'JC already got my phone number.' 'Great, one of us will
be in touch tomorrow.' 'See you then.'
	Mark left the hospital. He was glad that he hadn't driven in that
morning, It was a pleasant evening and the half hour gentle stroll home
gave him an opportunity to think about what had happened. Arriving home at
about six he went straight to dinner, and then going back to his room he
started to record his thoughts on the days events in his diary. As he was
doing this the phone rang. wondering who would be ringing him this evening
he picked it up. 'So the wanderer has returned.' Catherine said. Laughing
Mark said, 'So what's got you in such a fine mood?' 'I've been ringing most
of the day to try and sort out what we're doing tomorrow evening.' 'I don't
know yet. Look Catherine, I'm trying to arrange a surprise for you. I'll
ring you at some stage tomorrow and let you know.' 'Ok, you'd better. Just
you remember who has the tickets.' Both of them laughed and hung up. Mark
put the cd on and listened to all the songs before he went to sleep. He was
struck by the variety of the songs and was looking forward to the next day
immensely. turning his alarm off he went to sleep. The next morning Mark
woke to the sound of his ringing phone. Jumping up he ran over to the phone
and picked it up. Glancing at the clock he was amazed to see that it was
already 11am. 'Hello.' he said. 'Mark, is that you?' he recognised Justin's
voice. 'Yeah Justin, how are you?' 'Fine thanks, Yourself?' 'Yeah Great.'
'What can I do for you?' 'I was just ringing about later.' Justin replied,
'We wondered if you and Catherine wanted to have something to eat with us
before the concert.' 'I would love to,' Mark replied, 'and I'm sure
Catherine would be amenable.' 'Great, you can either meet us at our hotel,
or we can send the limo to collect you.' Mark thought for a moment,
imagining the looks on his friends faces if a limo pulled up to collect
him, and decided that it probably wouldn't be a good idea. 'We'll come to
you.' he said. 'Which hotel are you staying at?' 'The Hyatt.' 'What time
should we be there?' 'Come for about five. One of us will be in the lobby
waiting for you.' 'Ok I'll see you then.' Mark hung up and called
Catherine. 'Hello.' 'Hi Catherine, Mark. Can you be ready to leave by
four?' 'Four? It doesn't start till 7.30.' 'It's part of the surprise I was
telling you about. Just be ready ok, you'll love it.' 'Ok, but if I didn't
know better I'd think you were trying it on.'
	At four o'clock precisely Mark knocked on Catherine's door. He was
somewhat surprised when her boyfriend opened the door. They sat and joked
for a bit while waiting for Catherine to finish getting ready and when she
eventually came out at half past Mark said, 'typical woman to make us
late.' Catherine smiled and said, 'Watch it mate or I'll beat the crap out
of you.' Mark often laughed about Catherine being intimidating despite her
short stature, and they all laughed. Heading to the door they said goodbye
and started on the short walk to the hotel. 'Good job I allowed plenty of
time for you to be late.' Mark said. Catherine mock punched him in the arm
and said, 'So why are we so early.' 'I told you, its a surprise.' 'Well it
had better be good.' As they walked into the Hyatt at 5.02 she said, 'Why
are we at the Hyatt?' 'You'll see.' Just then the lift door opened and out
stepped JC. Walking over to them he said, 'Hi Mark, and you must be
Catherine.' 'Surprise.' Mark whispered to Catherine, but she didn't hear
him as she fainted. JC caught her before she hit the floor, and turning to
Mark he said, 'You didn't tell her did you?' Mark replied, 'I thought it
would be a nice surprise. I didn't know she was going to pass out on me.'
JC laughed and they sat Catherine down. A receptionist came running over
with a glass of water and they soon had Catherine awake and she was
laughing about the whole thing. 'We'd better be off' said JC. 'Follow me.'
They followed him through the lobby and into the dining room where the
others were waiting for them. Mark made sure he was standing behind
Catherine and when she commented on this he said, 'Can't have you
collapsing on us again can we.' Sitting down with the others they chatted
over a light dinner and Mark was pleased to see that Catherine was getting
on really well with the guys. 'So how do you know him?' she asked, pointing
at Mark. Lance proceeded to give her a pretty thorough description of the
previous days events, omitting only the fact that he and Justin were
gay. While he did this Justin lent over and said to Mark, 'I told the rest
of the guys about myself last night.' 'I'm pleased.' Mark said. Standing up
JC said we have to leave for the arena now. Glancing down at his watch Mark
noticed that it was already half past six. Standing up Justin said, 'come
on, you two are coming with us. Oh and before I forget.' and he handed them
each a backstage pass. Catherine screamed with joy. JC laughed. 'You really
didn't tell her anything did you.' 'What and miss all this fun' Mark
joked. 'If I wasn't having so much fun your life wouldn't be worth shit'
Catherine snarled.
	Piling into the limo which had pulled up outside the hotel they
drove to the arena chatting on the way. The Limo pulled up at the front of
the arena to drop Mark and Catherine off. As they got out Lance said, 'If
you wait for the crowd to dissipate a bit at the end, and then head towards
the stage. Show the passes to one of the security guards and they will give
you directions on where to find us. The limo pulled away and Mark and
Catherine joined the queue waiting to get in. Finding their seats they sat
down to watch the show. The warm up act was dire but when the guys came out
they joined in the cheers. The show was amazing despite the fact that Lance
had to spend the whole time sat on a stool. Just before the final song,
Justin walked to the front of the stage and said, 'You may be wondering why
Lance hasn't been dancing tonight and the truth is that he was involved in
an accident yesterday and has to take things easy for a bit. Don't worry
though, its nothing serious and he will soon be back to his normal
self. This last song is dedicated to a good friend of ours out there in the
audience. You know who you are and we just want to say thanks for being
there for our Lance.' As the music to Everything I Own started to play
Catherine put her arm around Mark's shoulder and gave him a quick hug. 'How
did they know that that was my favourite?' he whispered in her ear. 'I
don't know.' she said, giving him a butter wouldn't melt grin.
	After the concert finished they did as Lance had said and waited
for the crowds to die down before heading backstage. They chatted for a bit
before heading out to the limo. Mark and Catherine were about to find a
taxi when Lance said, 'Hey we'll give you a lift. We've had enough taxis
round us recently. The Limo dropped them off at Catherine's, where Mark had
parked and before leaving they exchanged e-mail addresses and the boys
signed their passes as souvenirs. As the limo sped off Catherine gave Mark
a hug and said, 'Thank you, that was marvellous.'


Authors notes:

1.) Mark is a friend of mine. He's about 6' tall with copper coloured hair
and is to the best of my knowledge straight. (unfortunately)

2.) Catherine is an acquaintance, but she has the type of personality I
wanted so I went with it.

3.) I know some of you will be pissed at the lack of sex, but having read a
lot of the stories here I reckon that the best ones are those which don't
have people fucking every five minutes.

4) If you have something to say, e-mail me. Anything constructive, whether
positive or negative, will be welcomed (please bare in mind that this is my
first attempt.)


Matt. (e-mail matt_morris_uk@hotmail.com)