Date: Sat, 21 Aug 1999 22:36:56 -0700 (PDT) From: Zeo M Subject: N Sync Love pt.14 JC turned his head back and saw Justin standing there in a daze. He walked back towards Justin and put his hand on Justin's shoulder. "We have to go," JC whispered. Justin didn't answer, he just kept looking at me. "Justin...there's nothing we can do," JC solemnly said, "We need to get some rest, we have to go." "Mano..." Justin mumbled. "Yeah..." JC sighed, "He is a good friend...I will never forget him." "No..." Justin said and JC looked at him oddly, "Mano's gonna be all right," another tear rolled down his face. "What?" JC gasped, "Wha...what do you mean?" "He told me that he's gonna keep fighting," Justin looked into JC's eyes. "Oh my God," JC said shocked. Justin moved aside and JC quickly stood beside the bed. He took my hand and gently kissed it. "Thank you," he whispered as tears welled up inside. Justin quietly slipped by JC and quickly went out the door. "What took you so long?" Brian questioned, "And where's JC?" "Yeah," Kevin softly said, "What took you so long?" "Um...well," Justin didn't know how to say it. "Well what?" Brian asked. "Mano was talking to me," he softly said. "What?" Kevin said stunned and Justin nodded his head. "My God," Kevin immediately ran to the receptionist to get a doctor. Justin plopped down on the chair and let a loud sigh of relief. Brian did the same thing. This must have been the most stressful day that Justin could have ever imagined. Though he knew that it was just beginning. A few minutes passed and Kevin hasn't come back yet. Justin was about to fall asleep when he heard footsteps. He shook out the sleep and looked down corridor. He stood up to greet the party. "Where's Mano?" Chris said out of breath. "Hey Just, I did as you asked," Nathan spoke. "Thanks," Justin gave Nathan a hug. "So where's Mano?" Joey asked again. Justin turned his head towards the door and everyone peered through the window. "How's he? Can we go in?" Joey said quickly. "I don't know," Brian made his presence known. "Brian?" Chris asked in surprise, "What do you mean?" "Well, Kevin has to okay you guys first. He's in charge." "Oh?" Joey was confused, "Well..where is he?" "He's getting a doctor," Justin said, "The doc has to check up on him." "Oh ok," Chris sounded disappointed, "We'll just wait here." Lance was transfixed at what was going on in the room. He saw JC lean over kissing me on the cheek. He felt something heavy in his chest when he saw what happened. He looked back down and took a seat next to Justin. Justin look towards Lance and saw his expression. He really didn't get it, but of course nothing really made sense cause he was so tired. Kevin came down the hall with the doctor, "You're here to see Mano too?" he said surprised looking at the group. Everyone nodded. "Please wait here while I examine the patient," the doctor said. Kevin agreed and the doctor stepped in. A few moments later JC stepped out of the room as well. "Hi guys," JC said. "How's Mano doing?" Justin asked. "I dunno. The doctor asked me to leave so he can do some tests." "How long have you two been here?" Chris asked. "Um..since this morning," Justin replied. "Oh ok," Chris nodded a little. "I thought you guys were gonna come sooner," Justin remarked. "Well..." Joey looked towards Lance, "We were looking for Mano since five this morning." "You've been looking for him all this time," JC turned to Lance in amazement. Lance looked up at JC and quickly shied away, "Um...yeah." "So..what happened?" Chris was anxious to know. Justin looked at JC and JC turned away from any eye-contact. Chris looked puzzled and was about to say something. "During the storm," Kevin jumped in, "Mano caught pneumonia." "Oh ok," Chris sort of agreed on the answer. "So..um," Lance stuttered out, "What are you two doing here?" Kevin looked at the guys for a minute, "Brian and I brought him here." "Do you, uh, know him or something?" Joey asked. "Yeah," Kevin sighed, "Mano and I go way back." "Oh ok," Lance responded. An awkward silence settled down over the small group outside the room. Joey, Chris and Lance didn't want to say anything cause they were confused with the whole situation. JC and Justin were not in the mood to talk about anything. Nathan, well, he was just plain tired. When the knob to the door turned, everyone snapped up and looked at the door. The doctor slowly exited out the room and Kevin quickly stood up. "How is he?" Kevin nervously asked. "Well, it seems like his heartbeat has stabilized as well as his breathing," the doctor replied. "He's gonna be okay, right?" Kevin jumped on the opportunity. "I don't know yet," the doctor said, "But if his vital signs improve, he should pull through." "Thank God," Kevin sighed. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief. JC glanced around and saw how bad Lance looked. "Um..you look pretty bad," JC said to Lance. "Well...he's been looking for Mano since yesterday night," Joey hesitantly said. "Holy," JC's jaw dropped, "I...I didn't know how much he meant to you," JC stuttered. "It' okay," Lance lazily replied, "As long as...Mano's safe..." Lance started to doze off. "I'd better drive you home," JC said, "Hey Just," JC turned towards Justin, "Is it okay to use the car?" "Um..sure," Justin reached in his pocket and handed JC the keys. "Thanks," JC turned to Kevin, "I wish I could stay with him for tonight." "S'ok," Kevin replied, "I'll spend the night here and take the day off tomorrow." "What?" Brian questioned, "But there's an important meeting tomorrow..." "Which you and the rest of the guys can handle without me," Kevin interrupted, "I know that you guys can do fine without me for a day." "But..." Brian insisted. "No buts," Kevin cut him off again, "I let you guys slide on more than one occasion. It's my turn to take the day off." Brian pouted knowing that he could never win in an argument with his cousin, "Ok...I'll tell the guys you can't make it." "Good. Now you guys should go back home and sleep," he put his hand on JC's shoulder, "I'll take care of him, don't worry." "Thanks," JC made a small smile at Kevin. "Yeah..guess it's time for us to go," Justin slowly stood up. JC had his arm around Lance's shoulder while they left the building. He didn't want Lance to fall flat on his face. The rest of the guys headed off to the van and Brian went back to his car. Kevin waited patiently as a cot was set up in the room for him to sleep on. JC sort of staggered as he tried to keep Lance from falling down. Getting tired of this, he flung on of Lance's arms over his shoulder and half dragged and half walked to the car. Once in a while he would glance over and see the Lance's face going in and out of sleep. JC smiled a little and noticed the sharp features of his friend's nose as well as the slightly round cheeks. Unknowingly, he pulled his friend closer till their faces were almost touching. JC wanted Lance to be okay, but he didn't know how. In the parking lot, JC had difficulty opening the passenger door, but once that was accomplished, he very gently placed Lance in the seat and quietly buckled him up. JC closed the door making sure that he didn't slam so that Lance could keep on sleeping. He hopped into the driver's side and drove out of the lot heading towards Lance's home. The ride was a silent, but peaceful drive. Cars were few and far between and the city sky was dotted with pinpoints of light. JC would occasionally glance over towards Lance to see how he was doing. He was really worried about him and didn't really understand why Lance would go to such extreme measures. `Does he like Mano?' JC thought, `Is Lance gay?' These were the things that were going through his mind as JC drove on. He knew that one of these days, he would have to confront Lance and clear the air between them. A small sigh escaped as the drive neared to the destination. JC slowly parked the car in the driveway and shut off the engine. By the time they arrived, Lance was already fast asleep. After much difficulty getting Lance out of the car, JC slung Lance's arms around his shoulders and slipped his arm under the legs. JC never knew that Lance was so heavy, but he used all his strength to carry the sleeping lad to the front door. Along the way, a gentle wind blew and Lance instinctively snuggled up to JC while he was being carried. JC felt a sense of warmth and belonging when Lance held tighter, but it soon faded as quickly as it came. He felt through Lance's pockets to get the house keys and quietly opened the door. Again, he carried his friend up the stairs and into his room. Out of breath, JC managed to pull off the shoes and tucked him comfortably into bed. He saw his sleeping friend looking so peaceful and serene. He leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead and whispered good night to him. Lance moved a little, "J....I love you..." he mumbled out. 'Jay?' JC curiously thought, 'You are gay...aren't you? I..I didn't know. I should have been there when you needed someone to talk to. Guess I screwed up again...' JC sighed and slowly exited the room. "...will always love you..." Lance mumbled in his sleep one more time. JC opened his eyes to the blackness of his room. He thought about what happened yesterday and it was all too clear to him. He turned his head and saw that the clocked read 5:00 am. He sighed and sat up. Not knowing what to do, he looked towards the dark window on the far side of the room. Finally getting enough strength to get up off the bed, JC turned on the desk lamp. He opened a drawer and pulled out a small black box. Opening the box, the jewel encrusted pin sparkled under the incandescent glow of the lamp. Like a bolt of lightning, he immediately got dressed and attached the pin over his heart. JC quietly crept out of the room and silently walked down the stairs. Leaving through the door and firing up the car, he drove off towards the hospital. Since it was so early in the morning, there were few cars on the road. Eventually it would be a mad house as commuters would jam the roads trying to get to work. His destination would be the hospital. Upon arrival, he walked by a little flower/gift shop at the entrance. Stopping to look at the different flowers, JC decided to get something to make the room look better. He went in and looked around the store. It was a typical little gift store filled with knick-knacks and flowers. He looked around the picked out a bouquet of a dozen red roses. When he was about to pay for the flowers, something caught is eye. It was a small bouquet, about half the size of the one he was holding. But instead of a dozen lush roses, it consisted of four lush orchid flowers. The orchid was a shade of yellow which turned into gold in the center of the flower. He immediately put down the bouquet he was holding and picked up the orchids. For something that small, it was as expensive as the roses, but he didn't care. He quickly left the little store and headed to the room. A quick peek through the glass, he saw Kevin dutifully up and reading over some papers. Kevin looked up and saw JC looking the glass and smiled a little. JC quietly opened the door and stepped in. "Morning JC," Kevin said. "Morning Kevin," he replied, "I though you might be asleep or something." "Heh..Me?" Kevin said, "I'm usually up at this hour." "Ah ok." "I see you brought flowers," Kevin remarked as he noticed the bouquet. JC blushed a little, "Uh..yeah." Kevin smiled, "You know...orchids are his favorite." "Really?" JC replied astonished, "I never knew." "Yeah..he didn't like roses cause he kept pricking himself with the thorns," Kevin giggled at the thought, "So he went to orchids instead." "Ah I see," JC said and pulling a chair and sitting in front of Kevin. Kevin looked around and found a small vase, "Put the flowers in here," Kevin passed the vase to JC. "Thanks," JC replied as he placed the flowers into the vase and setting it on the table next to me. "Are you going to stay here all day?" Kevin asked. "Um..if that's all right with you that is," JC sheepishly said. "Of course it is," Kevin sounded a little surprised, "Why wouldn't it be?" "Well..um...Mano never really said anything about you and..." JC trailed off. "And you wanted to know what's the up between me and Mano, right?" Kevin asked finishing the thought. "Yeah...I was shocked that Mano told you everything and he didn't tell me or any of the guys about you." "Ah..I see," Kevin turned to look at me, "I guess he took it harder than I realize." A small silence issued forth. The first rays of morning light streaked through the room and covered the orchids in a soft golden glow. "It was when...oh, that was so long ago...it was when I first saw Mano......." Kevin started the story. Justin, Chris and Nathan were up and about eating breakfast. "Do you know what we're supposed to do today?" Chris asked. "Nope," Justin replied. Chris sighed a little. Another spoonful of cereal and the phone rang. "I'll get it," Nathan said. Chris and Justin just kept eating. "Hello," Nathan spoke into the receiver, "Oh hi Lance. How're you feeling? Cool," Nathan handed the cordless to Justin. Justin took it, "Hey Scoop, feeling better?" "Yeah, much," Lance echoed back through the phone. "That's good, so what's up?" "I looked in my planner and we have to lay down some tracks to the single." "Already? Oh yeah...that's right." "Yeah..we're supposed to do it today so you'd better get moving." "Oh ok. I'll tell the rest of the guys here. We'll be there in like an hour." "Ok..don't be late, later." "Later," Justin put the receiver back in it's cradle. "What did Scoop say?" Chris asked when Justin came back to his seat. "He told me that we're supposed to lay some more tracks for the single," Justin resumed his cereal. "Ah ok, so when do we get moving?" "In about an hour or so." "Is everyone going to be there?" Chris asked. "Of course...why?" Justin looked at Chris. "Well...JC isn't here," Chris replied. "Huh?" "Yeah, when I woke up his door was open and he wasn't in his room. His jeep isn't in the driveway either." "Oh...I see..." Justin said slowly. "This is really strange..." Chris peered at Justin, "Do you know where he went?" "I think so..." "Lemme guess...at the hospital right?" "Most likely," Justin replied, "Should we go and get him?" Chris thought for a minute, "Na...I don't we need to." "You know that he's gonna get it for not showing up," Justin reminded Chris. "I know, I know," Chris replied, "He can always make it up tomorrow." "Heh...another all day session for JC," Justin snickered, "We'd better be going. Lance is expecting us there at the studio soon." "Okay...I'll be ready in a few," Chris got up and walked to his room. Justin finished his cereal and looked at Nathan, "You wanna come?" Nathan smiled, "Yep." "Better get dressed, we're leaving soon." Nathan nodded and they went up to their rooms. In about a few minutes, all of them were ready and headed out the front door. Didn't take them long to reach the studio and by the time they got there, Lance and Joey were already waiting for them. "Hey you guys," Lance looked around, "Where's JC?" Justin glanced quickly at Chris, "We think he's at the hospital," Chris replied. "Oh?" Lance asked surprised, "You didn't call him or anything like that?" "We couldn't," Justin said, "He left his cell in his room and we didn't have enough time to go get him." "I guess. He'll have to pull an all nighter tomorrow then." "Yeah...Say is Joey here too?" "Yep. He's with Jay in the cafeteria getting some snacks." "Cool," Nathan said, "Now I won't be so bored." "Behave," Justin gave him a slight warning. "I will," Nathan sounded innocent, "Don't worry. I'm not gonna do anything." "You better not." "We should get started," Chris said, "I wanna start on the video and go on tour." "Me too, should get started with or without JC?" Lance suggested. "Looks like we're going on without JC," Chris replied. "Guess so." The trio headed off into the interior of the building, while Nathan went in search for Joey and Jay. Nathan went straight for the cafeteria like Lance said and saw the two in the far corner. He watched them for a bit and then proceeded to walk towards them. A few steps away, Joey looked up and saw Nathan. He waved at him. "Hey Nate, what's up?" Joey said happily. "Nutting much," Nathan replied, "The rest of the guys are heading towards the studio now." "Ah ok," Joey acknowledged, "I'll see you later Jay." "Okay," Jay smiled at Joey, "I'll see you during lunch or something." Joey nodded and he walked out of the cafeteria. Once he was out of sight Nathan sat down right in front of Jay. "What's up Jay?" Nathan asked. "Nutting much," Jay replied, "Joey and I were munching on some carrots while waiting for the rest of the guys." "Anything else happen?" Nathan peered in a little closer. "Wha..what do you mean?" Jay shifted a little in his seat. "Heh..ya think you can slip that by me eh?" Nathan snickered. "What? Slipped what by you?" "You and Joey are flirting," he said it bluntly. Jay looked at him shocked, "Yeah..right whatever." "Don't avoid it. I can tell that you two are flirting." "Yeah..so what if we are?" "Hmf..thought you and Lance were an item." Jay looked down at the table, "Yeah...I thought so too." "So? What's going on here?" "I'll tell you if you promise not to say anything." "Sure..I guess." "Ok..well..I just don't know. Lance is nice and all..." "But?" "Um...It's odd..I do like him, but I don't love him like I should...You know what I mean." "I think I do," Nathan replied, "You just dated cause he's in a band right?" Jay looked at Nathan shocked, "I would never do that. True it was a nice thought, but when I got to know Lance, all that went away..He's a really nice guy..." "But you don't really love him like you thought you would have." "Yeah..I guess...and I don't know how to tell him either." "Oh? Why not just tell him?" "Cause...He's been through a lot and I don't want to hurt him more." Nathan thought about it for a little while, "Actually..you're going to hurt him even more by playing this game." "How so?" Jay looked at him confused. "Well think about it...He has feelings for you and what if he finds out that you are going out with Joey?" Jay didn't say anything. "Right, he'll be hurt even more because he trusted you." "What should I do?" Jay sheepishly asked. "You can of course tell him how you feel," Nathan bluntly said. "I can't." "Why not?" "Cause...I don't want to ruin our friendship or anything like that." "Well you're gonna ruin it if you don't tell him. If you tell him now, at least you're being honest and truthful about it. It may not turn out as bad as you might think." Jay looked at Nathan hesitantly, "You know...for a fourteen year old, you know your stuff." "Heh," Nathan snickered, "I just watch a lot of soap operas." They both laughed. "I guess you're right," Jay said, "If I don't tell Lance now, it's gonna hurt more if he finds out." Nathan nodded, "Yep..but the hard part is telling him that you're dating Joey." Jay's eyes bulged, "I am NOT dating Joey," he argued. "Hahaha," Nathan bellowed, "Calm down. You may not be dating now...but I can sorta see something between you." Jay snickered, "You must be hallucinating. Joey and I are good friends...nothing more." "Yeah...Right..." not believing him. "Whatever," Jay retorted back. "So...what do you wanna do?" Nathan changed the subject. "I dunno...wanna walk around and shop?" "Sure..lets go." "...and that's what happened," Kevin said and took a bite of his turkey sandwich. "Wow...I never knew that you guys are that close," JC remarked as he munched on his salad. "Yeah...Mano and I have been through a lot together. Even when we were apart I always had him in my mind and somehow...he always managed to put a smile on my face." JC looked down at his bowl, "I'm so sorry for screwing things up." Kevin looked at JC, "It's not your fault. If Mano was sitting here, he wouldn't want you to be like that." "Yeah...I know...but...I can't help it." "I know...but remember, he's gonna pull through. The doctors say he's recovering very quickly." JC sighed, "Yeah...I know..." Kevin looked at him curiously, "What's wrong? Aren't you glad that he's gonna wake up soon." JC looked up at Kevin, "Oh don't get me wrong, words don't begin to describe how I feel about Mano waking up..it's just..." "It's just what?" Kevin leaning a little closer. "It's just, I don't know how he's gonna react towards me after all I've done," JC sighed. Kevin contemplated on what he heard, "Well, you're right about that. He will forgive you, but he won't be able to forget what happened. So I really don't know what's gonna happen after he wakes up." "And I don't know what to do when he wakes up..." JC softly added. "When the time comes, you'll know what to do." "I hope so too," JC sighed. Kevin and JC finished their late lunch and went back to the room. JC stepped inside the room first and saw the guys there, "Hey guys. What's up?" "Nothing much," Chris replied. "We just finished laying down tracks for the single," Lance commented. "Today?" JC was surprised, "How come you guys didn't come and get me?" "We thought that you stayed here," Justin jumped in, "It would have made us late if we came and got you." JC looked at him oddly, "Um ok..so that means.." "That means you're gonna stay in the studio all day tomorrow," Lance said. "That's ok...no biggie," JC replied. "So..How's Mano doing?" Joey asked. "He's doing great," Kevin happily said, "The doctor said that he could wake up any day now." Joey turned to Kevin, "Cool. Can't wait to talk to him." "Yeah..I can't wait either," Kevin sighed. "Well...we came down to see how Mano was doing and drop some flowers too," Lance took a quick glance at JC then looked at Kevin. "Mano will appreciate that, thanks." "No prob." "Yeah..well, we'd better be going," Chris said. "Already?" JC asked. "Yeah..we have an interview tomorrow and stuff like that," Chris replied. "And you have to stay in the studio all day," Justin reminded JC. "Yeah..I know," JC sighed. Lance glanced at JC then towards me, "We should be going," "Yeah...we should," Joey agreed. "I'll stay for a little bit longer," JC replied. Chris was a little surprised, "Oh..ok...Just don't stay so late, you have an appointment tomorrow and the execs will drag you to the studio if you're late again." "Ok...I'll stay for another hour or so..then I'll come back home," JC semi-argued. "Just letting you know," Chris replied. JC nodded and the rest of the guys filed out of the room. Once they left Kevin pulled up a chair, "You haven't told them, have you?" JC hung his head down, "No...not yet." "And Justin is the only one who knows?" Kevin asked as JC sat down on the other chair. "Yeah..." "Ah..I see," Kevin paused for a bit, "Are you going to tell them?" "Eventually...But I'm scared to.." "Yeah...I understand." JC looked at Kevin oddly, "You're gay too?" "Oh no..not me," Kevin replied, "Brian is..and he was so afraid of being rejected that he kept it to himself for a long time." "Then what happened?" JC perked up. "Well..it killed him keeping a secret from us. Broke down a few times during on tour." "Really? That bad," Kevin nodded. "Yeah, it was a tough time for all of us." "How'd he manage to tell it to the rest of the guys?" JC was curious to know. "Actually...I asked him to tell it to everybody?" "You?" "Yeah...I was really worried for him and I told him that he should say something to the rest of the guys." "What did he do?" "Bri didn't want to do it at first...but when he realized how it was distancing himself from the rest of the group..he finally told everyone." "You helped right?" "Nope...I was there for support..but he basically did it on his own." "What happened after?" "Nothing...The guys needed to get used to it, but it was no big deal. We just have to be careful about it getting to the public..but it really wasn't a big deal." "Oh..ok," JC said looking at the ground. Kevin put his hand on his shoulder, "Don't worry about it..when you're ready, you'll tell them. But at least you know that Justin won't turn on you." "Heh..yeah...I guess..." Kevin sighed a little. A few minutes of silence passed when Brian entered the room. Kevin looked up, "Hey cuz...how was the meeting?" Brian looked sternly at Kevin, "It went all right I suppose. Everyone was pretty ticked that you didn't show up." "What for?" Kevin replied in a similar manner. "It was technical crap that was being passed our way and we didn't understand much of it," Brian said a matter of factly. "You guys have been through so many, and you guys didn't know what it was about?" sounding annoyed now. "Well excuse us for not being bright," Brian replied sarcastically. "I hope you guys didn't screw things up." "What?" Brian snapped at his cousin, "You think that we'll screw things up cause you're not there?" "It sure seems like it." "Heh...whatever...Sorry to disappoint you...We didn't fuck up like you think." "I bet..." "Wouldn't have gone that way if you didn't stay here all day," Brian snorted. "Look Brian," Kevin said strongly, "Not now...I can't handle everything right now. This is just too much for me to handle." "Heh..too much..Yeah right..." Brian cooed. "The hell is that supposed to mean?" Kevin got angry, "You skipped more meetings than I care to remember." "But I never skipped something this important." "Well...I thought you guys could handle it without me for once...guess I was wrong." "Would be nice if you would SHARE with the rest of the guys what you do." "What? It's YOU that don't want to help out." "Whaddya mean..." With raised voices, Kevin and Brian argued back and forth about nothing and everything. With each breath, they shouted louder and louder. Then, the machine next to the bed started to beep loudly and irregularly. My breathing became spasmodic and I almost went into convulsions. Just then the doctor and nurse came storming in. The doctor took a quick look at me, "Get me 25ccs of adrenaline, stat," he quickly said to the nurse. "Got it," she said equally as fast. Kevin, Brian, and JC stood there petrified at what was going on. "All of you leave the room now," the doctor ordered, "Get me a tube and some pumps." All of them shuffled out of the room as fast as they could while the doctor and nurse worked feverishly to restore my vital signs. Kevin sat down on chair nervously rocking back and forth. Brian had his arms crossed and looking at the ground while leaning against the wall. JC was just standing there dumbfounded at what had just occurred. Kevin made a loud sigh, "I'm sorry Brian." Brian turned and looked rather disgusted at himself for yelling. Kevin looked up, "I know what you think. I should have went to the meeting...you were right." "No..." Brian softly said, "You were right to stay here." "I guess...But with the group agenda and Mano's condition...I "How...how is he?" Kevin asked. The doctor glared at him, "He's gonna be all right...Almost had a collapsed lung but managed to save it in time." Kevin let out a loud sigh. "Now...as for the other matter," the doctor said sternly, "He may be sleeping, but he certainly isn't oblivious to outside stimuli. If you want to keep seeing him either you be calm or I will have to terminate all visits until he recovers." A brief silence followed, "I understand," Kevin replied apologetically. "Good...he needs some quiet rest. I suggest you come back tomorrow." The doctor and nurse walked down the hallway and disappeared into a room. "Well..guess I should be going back," JC said, "The guys are waiting for me." "Yeah...I should be going as well," Kevin said and he glanced quickly at Brian. "See you later." "Yeah..later." With that they parted ways and headed to their respected vehicles. JC drove solemnly towards home while Brian and Kevin sat motionless in their car. It was dark and cold...I couldn't see anything...The only thing that popped into my head were....orchids.....