The Reformation

Chapter 3


If you are under 18 or not of legal age in your country, please don't read on. If  you couldn't accept themes in the likes of homosexuality, please don't read on. This is a story concerning gay males having intimate relationships and is considered FOR ADULTS ONLY due to its sexual theme and contents. BUT if you really like this stuff, please don't tell others. 

Everything in this story is purely FICTIONAL. Or it's not true!!! Even if this story involved the Backstreet Boys and a fictitious character, all that happens here is fictional... again, it's not true. I don't know anything about their sexuality, if they're gay (but I do have my speculations) or not but I wrote this out of freedom of speech and my love for these guys. I don't own or know the Backstreet Boys personally. I do know that Brian Littrell is married with Leighanne Wallace, so let's just assume that they didn't. AGAIN, it's NOT TRUE!!! but don't we all hope that it's true... hehehehe...



Hey guys and gals!


The third chapter of The Reformation fresh from the hard drive Well, this is a BSB story that involves Brian Littrell of BSB and a fictitious character. I hope that you like this one like Crossed Paths


I'm so, so, so sorry for the delay of the chapter but college has been treating me harshly these past few weeks. And I have to read lots of boring novels. If it's only slash fanfic... well anyway, I just hope that y'all like this one and it's a little mellow this time coz the big chapter is the next one... also with Crossed Paths. 


A bunch of apologies for the typographical and grammatical errors found. I finally realized that I hate prepositions... I'm having a hard time using them!


In this story, Leighanne and Brian are not married even if they are. They seemed happy (?) but this is my fiction so here, Leighanne is not married to Brian.


PLEASE SEND ME MAIL!!!!! and... Thanks to those who have emailed me giving their feedbacks and please continue on sending those because those are really appreciated and loved whether they are positive or negative ones.


I suggest these stories 'coz they really made a big impact in my writing:


Brian and Justin  The One
Jamie's Romance Nick and Brian
Model Romance Josh and Just
Because I Love You My Surprise Romance
Forever Get Another Boyfriend
Brian and Me Search and Rescue
My New Life  Kevin and Justin
Living Jimmy Needs Assistance
Justin's Dark Angel French Kiss Me
Powers that Be Nick and the Altos

      .... there are more but these are my favorites!


Please send comments, suggestions, or just to say hi to me. All are encouraged and very, very much appreciated.






Two weeks have passed by since the Backstreet Boy left and my life was changing. It's not like the world around me was changing but I was the only one who seemed to be changing. The image I kept for 5 years in seclusion and isolation just disappeared without a trace in my present life and in my present world that revolves around Brian. I was different from the pathetic Martin I used to gain solitude in life.

I still work with Alfred in the cafe but things did change with our relationship. He seemed to be more lenient this time around since I became more convivial and jovial around the cafe and around him. I guess he really likes the real me. "Hey Marty! You gonna go to the new club later on?" Alfred asked me as he finished his paperwork. Alfred is cool after all. You just have to get to his good side to find the coolness he kept hidden.

"Nah! Just gonna wait for the call of my man at home." I shouted from the computer station that I was shutting down. I was out of the closet and I'm damn proud of it. Alfred didn't discriminate me or anything and we just remained as close friends... not a manager-employee relationship that we had before my change.

"You're so lucky you have a guy in your life." Alfred said sadly. Well, Alfred did date a lot but he just can't find the right girl for him. He's just too picky.

"Man, if you just try one of those gals you date for a month. You'll prolly be attached right now." I tried to joke. Well, let's just say that Alfred changes his girlfriends as frequent as he changes his clothes. Like I said, he's just too picky.

"I just can't find the right girl but I'm sure I'll find her." Alfred said as he walked to the other stations and started shutting them down.

"Have it your way." I said defeated. "Well, Alfred I gotta go and wait for the call now. See ya tomorrow." I said my goodbye to Alfred. I walked to my car in a hurry. 

It's been like this for the past two weeks. Brian calls me up in the morning and we tell our love ya's and everything. Then in the evening he'll call up again giving me everything that happened to him throughout the day. Well, he talks most of the time and I listen because his life is more exciting than mine. Computer shop exciting? Please...

I parked my car in the garage and entered my newly decorated house. I changed the look of the house because it was really plain and ugly before. After everything that happened with Brian, I just found lots of reasons to change this and change that and voila, a new look for my home. It was kinda expensive but let's say that money is really not a problem in my league.

I walked to my phone to check if there were messages and there were actually two. I pressed the play button and the messages played out.

"Rich here! Still working in that little computer shop? You know that you have other talents other than making coffee and watching the computers there. Just wanna say hi because I'm really, really, really bored here! Call me as soon as..." Rich's voice was cut off by the beep of the answering machine that echoed inside the room. Well, I gotta call him if he's even at home. My hunch is that he's partying somewhere knowing that he's 'bored'.

The next message started to play in the machine. "Hi Martin. It's Nick." Nick calling me? That's different. "Please call me whenever okay?" Nick left his number and I wrote it on a piece of paper. Nick sounded so distressed in the phone. Is something wrong? I really hope not. I guess I have to call him then to find out.

I picked up the phone and dialed Nick's number. After a few rings, someone picked up. "Nick here!" Nick said with a glee. 

"It's Marty. What's wrong?" I asked immediately. Please don't let it be something bad. 

"Martin! Good thing you called. Wait a minute." Nick said on the phone and the next thing I heard where hollers from Nick calling the other three Backstreet Boys except Brian. That's weird... "Hey there, I'm back here with the guys." Nick said.

"What's going on there? Is there something that happened with Brian?" I was a really good worrier and when it comes with Brian... I'm a better one. There was silence on the phone. "There's something wrong with Brian. Tell me." I demanded. 

"Um, actually there's nothing wrong with Brian physically. He's healthy as a pig." AJ said. I sighed out of relief. Wait, then what's wrong? 

"Well, it's really a problem that is affecting the group and his performance." Howie said. Now, I was confused with the situation at hand.

"Let's just say that he doesn't act normally since the day we left." Kevin said. "He's not giving his best in the concerts and we feel bad about the fans because they're not getting the best in our concerts and we really want the best for them." Kevin explained. This is really big for them. "And when we're in down time, he just locks himself in his room and never comes with us to hang out or something." Kevin added about Brian's situation to me.

"But he doesn't act that way when he calls. He does act normal." I stated my observations.

"What can I say? He's a good actor." AJ said nonchalantly.

"Do you want me to talk to him?" I asked the guys.

"Um, actually... no." Nick said. Uh-oh. My heart seemed to beat faster and faster. Please don't let them say that I should break up with him. God, I can't stand it if he's not with me permanently. "We don't know if you would agree but we believe that it's for the best for all of us." Nick added. Oh my God... they're asking me to break up with him.

"I will not!" I shouted on the phone. "I just love Brian so much. I can't do it." I added.

"Please Martin. For Brian's sake." Howie pleaded. I just can't do it.

"Ask me anything but please don't let me break up with Brian." I started to tear up already. I was feeling the best in my life and I really don't want to let go of that high. Call me selfish but I really want this relationship with Brian to last a long time. 

"WHAT?!" The four shouted on the phone. They sounded so shocked. Now that's confusing. They ask me to break up with Brian and they're shock that I want to break up with Brian. Wait, do they want me to break up with Brian in the first place?

"You want me to break up with Brian right?" I asked the four. The next thing I heard was another loud shout of 'NO' from the other line.

"Why on earth will we do that? Brian will not even perform if that happens." AJ said.

"We want you to join the tour with us." Nick finally cleared my thoughts. So that's what they're thinking. Uh-oh, I think I jumped into conclusions again.

"Sorry! I thought you want me to break up with Brian." I said with relief. I wiped away the tears that formed from the thought of Brian and me breaking up. Did I just hear that they want me in the Backstreet Boys' tour? "Me in the Backstreet Boys' tour? I don't even know what I'll do there. I don't even know your music." I said. Okay, I know their music but not too much. I just started last week appreciating their music... well, they're good. 

"Please Martin. It's the only way and it will also benefit you. Brian will be happy and you'll be happy too." AJ pleaded. That makes sense. But I don't want to live on their means.

"But in one condition." I said.

"Anything." They said in unison. Wow, they really have harmony.

"I want a job. I don't want to be a free loader there and don't you ever think of making me a personal assistant coz I'll kick your sorry asses." I gave them my condition. I know I can go there on tour without that but I don't want to live with other's means. I'll just prove that Nick was correct.

"Is that it? You got a job then." Kevin declared excitedly. "But what can you do?" Kevin inquired. That's a good question.

"I can do lots of things. I did finish college with a degree in Music Production and another in Computer Science." I gave them my credentials that I have. I don't think that it would be that difficult finding me a job there. It is a concert tour.

"Two degrees? Wow." Nick said. I blushed.

"That makes it easier. You can either work with our website or you could be a sound engineer or something." Kevin gave me options to think about it. "What do you think?" Kevin asked.

"Actually, I don't care what job you give me except the assistant thing. Anything that's open." I said. I really don't like the idea of being their assistant. That's just too easy, and suspicious. I want a REAL job.

"I'll make a couple of calls and give you a call about the job later on." Kevin said. "But for now... your plane leaves Wednesday at 9:00 am." Kevin added. A plane already set for me? 

"You really think I would come?" I asked them. I was just answered by a unison voice... 'Of course!' That made me laugh and I bid them goodbye so I could pack for my departure in a matter of two days.

I walked in my room with a grin pasted on my face. I'm finally gonna see Brian again. I just feel so excited of seeing Brian after two weeks. And I'm finally getting a decent job. Not that working in a computer shop is indecent but we all know that it's a dead-end job. I guess I took it because of it's seclusion in the world but it will always have a place in my heart because it's the place where I found Brian, my angel.

I started picking clothes that I could bring on the road with me. Then I realized that no one would be living this house for a long time. The tour would last 'til next year and I have no idea when I'm gonna be back. There's just one person who would agree to live here while I'm gone with no hesitations. I looked at my watch to see the time... 11:00 pm; he's at home. I took the phone and dialed a familiar number.

"Hi there Richie!" I said chirpily. Well, he still lives with his family and always wanted to get a place of his own... the perfect opportunity.

"What do you want? What is it this time?" Rich asked me. He really knows me too well.

"Why? Can't I call my friend anymore?" I said in a mock hurt tone.

"Oh please! I've known you for years. What is it?" Rich retorted with a laugh.

"Okay. Well, I need someone that would live in my house coz I'm leaving to go to my boyfriend for awhile and I have no idea when I'm coming back." I said. I know that the keywords were 'house' and 'boyfriend' and he's gonna accept it.

"Is that it? Sure, this is so cool! Finally, a place of my own." Rich was ecstatic about it. It's Rich and a house for him... that's bound to happen.

"But when I'm back please use the guest room but you can still live in the house and NO sex on my bed ever or I'll make sure your dick won't enter another hole in your whole life!" I warned him jokingly. Well, let's say he's sexually active and I don't want another person sleeping there. Heck, I haven't even slept on it with someone.

"Fine! When can I move?" Rich asked excitedly. Kids...

"How about tomorrow?" Tomorrow just sounded nice at the time. 

"That would be so cool! I'll bring over my stuff tomorrow 9ish in the morning okay? Bye!" Rich said and he hung up the phone. He didn't even wait for me to answer back. I walked back to my room and made place for Rich's things and if I know Rich, it's a lot. I've been working for hours already trying to sort out my stuff and the phone again interrupted me. I answered it and it was Brian.

"Hi sweetie! How was your day?" I said on the phone as I laid down on my bed to rest my sore back. I can't believe that fixing your stuff is really hard work.

"It wasn't really that busy coz we have a free day today except for an interview and that was it. How bout you?" Brian said. See, he acts so normal and so happy. Now, should I tell him about me going there or not? A wicked grin appeared on my face.

"Same old. There's really nothing here to tell." I sighed out. I wanted to scream to him that I'm gonna be with him in the tour but where's the surprise in there right?

"C'mon! Alfred said that the cafe is always filled because there lots of girls... and guys hitting on you. That's something to tell." Brian joked. Is that something I want to tell Brian? If I know Brian, he's prolly so insecure that I'll find another one because he's gone. Well, he's wrong.

"Oh please! You know there's only one guy in my heart." I said to him. Brian just gave out a 'Aaaw'. "I know. Rich will always be in my heart!" I kidded around. 

"Very funny." Brian said sarcastically. I just laughed at him.

"You know that I'm kidding. You'll always own my heart whenever and wherever." I said lovingly on the phone.

"You too Marty." Brian said softly but it was just filled with love. "I think I'll hit the hay now coz we have a concert tomorrow evening." Brian said dejectedly. That was different. It's like he doesn't even want to perform. I guess he's really tired of being a star sometimes.

"That's fine babe. You rest your beautiful voice and your beautiful face and I'll wait for your call tomorrow okay?" I said on the phone. We said our goodbyes and love ya's and that's the end of our conversation. He's gonna be so surprised when he sees me on Wednesday. I smiled on that thought.

The next thing I knew was the sun pouring on my face. Wow, I slept last night without even knowing... is that possible? Anyway, this is my last full day here and then I'll be with the Backstreet Boys touring around the States and even around the world. Isn't it amazing?

I looked at the watch and it read 8:00 am. It was just right for me to do my morning routine and make breakfast for me and Rich who will arrive around 9:00 but before anything else... I picked up the phone and dialed Brian's number. After a few rings, Brian answered groggily.

"Still sleeping huh?" I asked chirpily on the phone, which I know he hates. Brian just grumbled something incoherently. "Oh please! I know you love it when I call you in the morning." I said as I turned on the knob of the shower and the sound of the water filled the bathroom.

"Oooh... taking a shower?" Brian said with a hint of excitement in his angelic voice. Isn't he gonna be surprised when I'm there tomorrow.

"Yeah, but you know what's missing?" I asked seductively.

"Me?" Brian groaned out.

"Nah! Nick. Isn't he so sexy these days?" I kidded which made him squirmed in laughter. "What? Nick's a hottie!" I tried to defend what I said.

"Well, it's just too funny to picture you and Nick together." Brian said before he burst in laughter once again. Isn't it hard to picture?

"You're weird." I said with a shrug.

"That's why you love me!" Brian chimed. Definitely.

"Of course sweetie. I'm gonna take a bath now. Good luck in your day and I love you!" I said to him. Brian bid his goodbye and we hung up. I left the phone on the counter and I entered the warm stream of water, which was so soothing. I just wish Brian was really here with me. Well, it's just a day and we're together again.

After I took a bath and dressed, I went downstairs and prepared breakfast. I started to beat eggs for the omelet and heat the pan for the bacon. In a few minutes, everything was set on the table and the only thing that I was waiting for is a certain guy to arrive. And he did. The doorbell rang nonstop and only one guy loves to do that... Rich.

"Can you quit it!?" I said irritated to him as I opened the door. Rich just gave me a lopsided grin that was turned into a face filled with shock. "Why?" I asked confused.

"You're... back!" Rich stuttered. Oops... I forgot to tell him about the change. Well, now he knows.

"Anyway." I rolled my eyes. "Just leave your stuff in the living room coz we are eating breakfast." I stated not giving room for any arguments. Rich didn't answer me and just remained there standing by the front door still staring at me. "I snapped back to my old self. Life goes on." I said as I walked away from my best friend and to the kitchen.

"You're back!" Rich repeated himself. Can't he just believe that there's room for the old Marty to be back. Kids...

I brought the food from the kitchen and started setting up the kitchen when Rich decided to snap out of his little small world and join reality. He was more composed now but there's still the grin that was so irritating. "I really have to meet that Brian guy. I dunno what he did to snap you back." Rich said as he sat down on the chair and started filling his plate with the food.

"In due time my friend." I said with a smile. I know that he's happy because he's been trying to snap me back to my old self for quite some time now but he wasn't successful. I would be very honored to present Brian to him in the future but I don't know how he'll react if he notices that he's a Backstreet Boy... another detail I forgot to mention.

"Still good as ever!" Rich said as he stuffed his mouth with more food. What can I say? I cook good food. I just grinned at Rich and started to stand up. "Where are you going?" He asked.

"I have to resign from my old work and get some stuff for the travel." I said to him. "Do whatever you want with the house but just not my room and my bed." I repeated my warning to him earlier.

"Okay! Leave now." Rich said still feeding himself with what's left on the table. 

I left the house and drove to the cafe with some hesitations in my mind. Is this the right thing to do? True that I'll be extremely happy 'coz I'm with Brian and I'll do something there I like to do... I hope. But what if Brian and I break up? Where will I stand in the tour? What will happen to me? Just questions with no answers. It was too early to give any answers to these questions coz time would only tell if these were to happen and like I always said, take it one day at a time.

I parked my car in an open space and thought of what I would tell Alfred with my sudden resignation. I walked out of the car and into the small cafe that served as my sanctuary for 5 years. 5 years of hiding from the hate and pain that I once felt with my so-called 'family'.

"Hi Marty! Ready for work?" Alfred was just opening the computers. This would be just so difficult for me to do because of the value of the cafe for me. But in my present life, Brian weighs much heavier than the cafe.

"Actually, no." I inhaled deeply. "I came here to tell you that I'm quitting." I finished the most difficult words with no difficulty. The explanation would be the hardest part.

"What?" Alfred said leaving the station he was opening. I flinched with Alfred's shocked words. Alfred rushed to my side with surprise written all over his face. "Am I not paying you well? Do you want a raise or anything? Tell me." Alfred looked so desperate that it pained me seeing him like this.

"Remember my boyfriend?" I asked him that he affirmed. "Well, he wanted me to join him in this tour and he gave me a job there. All they say about long distance are just so true. It's so hard especially at nights." I tried to tell him about the pain of the distance that bars Brian and I to be together.

"I see." Alfred said sadly. "I guess that your mind is made up but if you decide to come back. This little cafe is always ready to take you in." Alfred said with a weak smile.

"Thank you Alfred." I said as I gave him an embrace. "I'll surely miss this place." I said looking at the spacious room filled with computer stations.

"This place will miss you too." Alfred said. "Me too and the girls and guys who always go here just to flirt with you." Alfred joked. I laughed at his words. True, they would be so sad seeing I'm not in the cafe. 

"If they look for me, just tell them that they might see me in MTV someday." I said with a wink. I didn't give any other explanation but just left the place with a burden lifted from my shoulder. I thought that it would be so difficult but it was not. I guess hearing that it would always welcome me made it extremely easier.

I drove away from the little cafe and on with the mall to buy a few things for me and the guys. Well, I just love giving gifts and they are doing me such a big favor so who am I not to give a little something to them. And for Rich as well.

The amount of people in the mall was just right. There were only a few people in it; just right for shopping. I bought a few more shirts and pants that I would bring in the road. Some were for formal occasions and some for casual wear and if I read from the sites in the net, this wardrobe would just multiply and multiply. Enough with me, and here comes the most difficult part of this mall visit... the gifts.

For the past two weeks, I was busy tracking down the Backstreet Boys in their "Black and Blue" tour and it was really easy. Well, they are the Backstreet Boys. I even stumbled in those fan sites where all of their favorites and things that they like are listed so buying them gifts is not that tedious. I can say that AJ would be the easiest because of his fascination with those eyeglasses that he wears everyday. Eyeglasses for AJ! 

Then, for Nick. He's young and so engrossed with those console games... like me. So, he has lots of computer consoles in his closet so it would be just games for the Playstation2. Well, Nick is rich... he could buy the console or I could just bring mine... I'll just bring mine.

Kevin... well, he will give me the job in the tour so I should be most grateful with him. ALL sites say that he's the business type of guy among all of the Backstreet Boys. And I haven't seen him with a palmtop so I'll just buy a palmtop for him so he could organize all of the things he needs to organize even if there are already people doing it for him.

Howie would be the most difficult. I really don't know what to buy for him. I admit I was stomped. I was walking around the maill when I notice this one particular store. This particular store sells hard to find toys and that would prolly have exotic things as well that I could give to Howie.  I remember watching a rerun of their 100-hour world tour and him saying that he loves rare and exotic stuffed toys. 

After a few more strolls in the mall, I walked passed a shop filled with electronic mechanisms and one just got my attention. It was one of those petite Nokia phones. One thing that would really go with Brian. We did meet because of a cell phone after all. I bought two of those, one for me and one for him.

After a few more shop visits, I called it a day and decided to head home and see what my friend did to my house. Only God knows how he redecorated the whole house... except my room of course. The trip going home was quicker than usual so I reached the house around 7pm. I parked my car at the garage and entered the house with my mouth hanging.

"Like it?" Rich said with a lopsided grin pasted on his face. Well, I don't know if I'll be happy or very thankful with how he redecorated the house. It's actually outstanding. Rich rearranged the furnitures in a way that it looks better and more pleasing. He also placed some drapes at the windows giving it some life. Actually, that's the word for it... life.

"Good job but still, don't touch my room." I said with a grin. I think I did make a good choice with Rich. I smiled with that thought. I dropped the bags on the floor and Rich's eyes began to shine like a kid in Christmas morning.

"What did you bring me?" Rich said excitedly. I handed him a few bags and he immediately looked through what I bought for him. It was just some shirts I saw that would really look cool on him. "Cool! Thank you Marty!" Rich said giving me a smack at my forehead.

I looked at him filled with disgust. He knows I hate it when he does that, but he does it still. "You made your mark so let's fix something so we could eat and rest. Tomorrow is gonna be a big day." I said as I closed the door behind me.

"I already fixed dinner. I just hope that it's edible." I rolled my eyes with Rich's words. I know that Rich is an amazing cook but he just doesn't believe me. 

"Whatever." I said as I walked towards the dining room. True enough, it was a spectacular sight. Everything is garnished to the tiniest detail; like a professional chef does it. 

Our dinner was good and it seemed to be so peaceful at that time. It was the last dinner Rich and I would ever share at that moment coz I'm leaving next day. I can't believe that I would really see Brian tomorrow. After a few weeks, I'm gonna see him, cuddle him, kiss him... everything.

"Someone's happy." Rich chimed as he filled his mouth with another spoonful. That just disrupted the peace and the mental picture I was making. What a friend?

"I am happy. I just can't believe we would be together again." I said hopefully. I guess I was in denial. I know that I was a wreck for the past two weeks and Brian's phone calls were the only ones making me sane. 

"You know I'm also happy for you. And I do want to meetthis so-called Brian who made my little Marty so normal again." Rich said with a grin. He just won't let that go. Can't he just accept that I'm back and that's it? No strings attached, oops... wrong group. 

I was gonna say something but the phone rang. Fate must me against me today. I know that it was too early for Brian to be calling so I was left confused. Who would call me? I walked to the phone and answered it. It's Kevin.

"Hi Kevin." I said happily.  

"Hi Martin! I have good news!" Kevin said happily. The shuffles of papers could be heard from Kevin's side. He's really the business type. "Martin I found a job for you." Kevin said excitedly. Wow, he's so excited with this thing, more than me.

"Really? That's so cool. What is it?" I asked Kevin. I was excited and nervous coz God knows what job would I get there.

"Temporarily, you'll be the assistant sound engineer just for the moment, then, when our music director finally leaves on the 30th of July, you'll replace him." Kevin said. Music director? Me? I can't believe he did that. I was just thinking being a crew or something but the music director.

"Music director? Me? That's so big. Do you think I could handle this? You haven't even seen or heard what I'm capable of." I asked Kevin being my old low self-esteem person fighting to come back.

"Well, I did my research you know. I know already your music background and the stuff you made in your school. And I trust you very much and Brian is your boyfriend, that speaks a lot about yourself." Kevin said trying to explain to me how he could have offered me such a big job. Brian as my boyfriend? I hope they would just pick me with my own credentials.

"What does me being Brian's boyfriend do with this?" I asked with a hint of irritation in my tone of voice. Like I said, I don't want to lean on Brian too much. It would be just low and affirm Nick's early words to me.

"Well, we all know that Brian is really a poor judge of character but never did he let anyone get this close like where you are now. He even admitted he's gay to you and never did he admit that to us even if it's too obvious already with all the guys he befriended. And he never acted this way; he seemed to be two different persons. A happy one and a depressed one." Kevin explained to me. I finally calmed down after hearing Kevin. 

"Okay, I get it now and I'll try my best to do my job in the tour and to snap Brian from his depression." I said filled with optimism. 

"Just a run through for what will happen tomorrow. The flight is tomorrow at 9:00 am. Just give your name to the personnel in the airport and she'll give you your ticket. Once you reached Los Angeles, a limo will fetch you in the airport and bring you to the hotel. Then, wait for us then I'll give you a clearer view of your job there. Is it clear?" Kevin gave me the plan for my arrival tomorrow. Wow, he's so organized and so good. A sign of a good businessman.

"Everything's clear as crystal. I can't wait to see you guys tomorrow." I said to him excitedly. "I'm gonna call Brian and then hit the hay, okay?" I bid goodbye to Kevin.

"I'm tired myself after the concert and everything. Good night and see you tomorrow." Kevin said and he hung up the phone.

I then dialed Brian's number and after a few rings, Brian answered his phone. "Hi baby!" I said chirpily.

"Hi Marty." Brian's voice was filled with fatigue. I guess they did have a very tiring day.

"Tiring day?" I asked Brian trying to spark a conversation.

"You said it. We had a photo shoot in the morning and then an interview after lunch and lastly, the concert. I'm so tired of doing this thing." Brian poured out his pains. "It's just how it goes everyday that it becomes so tiring. And to top that, I can't be with you there." Brian continued.

"But music and performing is your life. This is the one thing that comprises your life. I love you for giving joy to your countless fans around the world. Some of them, you change their lives to a better one... like mine." I tried to convince Brian and shed a little optimism in Brian's dark cloud.

"I know but it's really too much." Brian complained once more.

"Come on, it's prolly one of those hell days. I promise tomorrow would be so much better." I said with a knowing smile.

"I hope so." Brian said. "How bout you? How was your day?" Brian's voice was so soft. Poor guy, he must be very tired.

"I quit my job." I said to him nonchalantly.

"What!?" Brian shouted. Wow, I didn't imagine he would react that way. Where's the fatigue? Where's the 'I hate my job' feeling? Sheesh... I tell that I quit my job then everything's gone. Well, that's sweet I must admit.

"I quit my job in the cafe." I repeated myself to Brian.

"Why?" Brian asked me. 

"Well, it's a dead-end job and I just took it coz I find it as a very reclusive place, a place where I could waddle in my miseries then. Now that I find my sweet angel, I don't need it anymore." I explained to him minus the detail that I'll be the assistant sound engineer of the Backstreet Boys part.

"How cute!" Brian cooed. "So you're lookin for a job then?" Brian asked me. I don't want to lie to Brian but what would I tell him? 

"Actually no. I'm just waiting for it." I said with the a knowing smile again. I guess that's the safest answer.

"Suit yourself. I'm gonna sleep now, I have to recharge my battery. Talk to you tomorrow okay? Love ya." Brian said softly. He's really tired. I have to make something up for tomorrow; something to make it special for the two of us.

"Love you more." and we hung up the phone with more thinking about how I'll pull something up without raising suspicion with the workers there. I guess the best thing to do is to look around the place then do whatever.

I walked back to the kitchen discovering that Rich has cleaned up already. There goes my unfinished dinner. I walked to my room and gave a final check with the things that I would bring tomorrow. I don't want to be hassled tomorrow; it's gonna be a roller coaster ride tomorrow and forgetting something is the last thing that I would need.

I laid back and thought of my new life with the Backstreet Boys. I know that it would definitely change dramatically but my mind wasn't centering about my life as a sound engineer or a music director, but as a normal person with the Boys. It was just a day with them; I have no idea if they would like me. What if they won't like me? Where will I go then? How about me and Brian?

I just closed my eyes so my insecurities won't get over me. It's just my pessimistic thoughts about life again. Everything would be fine... I should just keep repeating it until I would believe it but I just fell asleep saying to myself that everything would be fine.

That's chapter three of the series. I just hoped that you enjoyed this one like I did writing it.


again, PLEASE SEND ME MAIL! Please send comments, suggestions, or just to say hi to me. All are encouraged and very, very much appreciated.




For a final note, let's all support AJ's fight against depression. Let's pray for him as he undergoes his rehabilitation and let's all show them that we the fans fully support them whether on their ups and downs. Let the music continue...