R e f o r m a t i o n
C h a p t e r    3 9 

 by r (y) @ n [windang@softhome.net]


The tour resumed even with Justin and Josh not in good terms. What happened after I left Justin and Nick? Well, they argued once again. After a few minutes of silence, I could hear Justin screaming at Nick and I just had too much of it. I took my mp3 player and just played some nice tunes so that the cacophony of their screams would be filtered out. I could endure all kinds of music just to get away from all the drama.

Josh and Justin were professionals. I admire them for that. When they're on stage, they weren't showing any animosity but if you follow the concerts, you'll see that they weren't really talking and if they did, it was so tense. Lance, Chris and Joey were trying their best to pacify the situation. There were no shouting matches and they stayed in different rooms - the farthest from each other.

Brian returned after a few more days. He looked so stressed! He told me some stuff about it and Nick's album was still pushing. Kevin was thinking of filing a legal complaint against JIVE Records but they were still trying to gather more information about the situation. I tried my best to comfort Brian but it was no use. I knew that he couldn't sleep at night and all he did was think about it. Well, if I was in his place, I would do the same. They were like sitting ducks that couldn't do anything but just wait for the outcome.

Nick visited us a few times but not that often. He has recording to do. Brian maintained his distance from Nick and I knew that it saddened Nick. Brian is his best friend - Frick and Frack. But that seemed to dissipate because of the solo album thing. Justin was plain hostile with Nick. It's either shooting daggers with their eyes or a shouting match would ensue. So the best solution was that Nick comes occasionally and only when Justin was away with his "homies" or recording his album.

We were on our way to Fort Lauderdale. Two more concerts and this tour would wrap up. I knew that the guys were very happy because they couldn't bare the tension. For me, it was a little saddening because the people in the tour were my extended family already. I'm not talking about the NSYNC guys but also the band, make-up, helpers, security… almost everyone! I made an effort to meet them all and also to get to know them.

Someone was nudging me at my side. "We're here." Brian said with a smile. I looked outside of the airplane. True to what he told me, we have landed.

We gathered our carry-on and filed out of the plane. The security team was busy looking around and trying to keep the guys safe from the fans. Brian was sporting his disguise so there wouldn't be any issue on why a Backstreet Boy is in the entourage of NSYNC.

"Nick gonna be here?" I asked Josh who just smiled and nodded at me. I could see the longing in Josh's eyes. He truly missed Nick and it was difficult for him to be away with Nick especially with Justin always present. Josh would be a hypocrite if he would say that he's not in love with Justin anymore. The fact that he tries to maintain a distance from him tells a lot and of course, the pained look in his face when he sees Justin going out once again is a giveaway already.

It was still pretty early and we have the day for ourselves. The guys finished their sessions with me and Wade so they have their free time as well. It was a relief for me because I was stressed as well with the band and the choreography. I don't think I can manage this job any longer. Looking at the bright side, it's just 2 more concerts.

Josh waved at someone and broke away from us. "What's with him?" Brian asked me confused.

"Do you have to ask?" I asked him as I pointed at the guy wearing glasses and a fisherman's hat.

"Nick." Brian stated blandly.

"You gonna say hi?" I asked him.

"Sure." Brian said uncomfortably as we walked to Nick's direction.

"Hey Nicky!" I greeted him as I gave him a bear hug.

"Martin! I missed you a lot! Oh Brian! We should all go out some time. I have loads of stories to tell and these few days have been a blast." Nick told us enthusiastically.

"We heard! I always read, see or hear you doing something for the past days." I told him and I was really happy for him even if Brian wasn't.

"I know!" He groaned. "JIVE has been ordering me to do this and that and it's tiring! Thank God AC is always here to give me company." Nick said. He waved at the others guys who waved at him. Well, except Justin that didn't even look at him.

"You two gonna jet off?" I asked.

"Yeah! We're gonna go to my beach house and do some, um, business." Nick answered with a laugh. Josh just giggled and blushed.

"We're gonna head to Brian's house. So, if you wanna do some stuff other than what you do with Josh, give us a call!" I told him.

"Sure! We have to go now. Nice to see you again. See you around Mart, Bri." Nick said the two left us.

"How about his luggage?" Brian asked.

"He already made some plans for it to be sent to Nick's house." I answered him as we walked back to the others.

"Where are we headed?" Alex inquired.

"Brian's house. We have a free day, remember?" I replied.

"Oh yeah." Alex said as a wave of recognition filled his face. "Can I go out? I wanna see the rest of Florida." Alex pleaded.

"Sure." I answered and gave Brian a wink knowing how alone we were in the house. Brian just gave me a grin. "How bout you guys? Any plans?" I asked the others.

"Home." Chris, Joey and Lance answered.

"I'm gonna meet some people for my album." Justin said.

"Okay. We'll just see each other tomorrow." I declared. Brian, Alex and I separated from them walking to the reserved SUV that I requested. We placed our bags at the back and told the driver the direction to Brian's house. "You okay?" I asked Brian who was just staring at the passing scenery.

"Yeah. I'm just doing a little thinking." Brian answered with a weak smile.

"That must be hurting you." Alex piped in with an annoying grin. Brian just rolled his eyes at him. "Anyway, is there any nice place that I can go to?" He asked.

"I want to think about it but it might hurt me." Brian shot back that made me chuckle a little bit. I really love to see Alex being shot down because he's just a smart ass. I have no idea where he got that because I was really not like that… yeah, right.

"Smart ass." Alex mumbled as he pouted. Brian and I just laughed at him. Eventually, Brian did give Alex some places that he could go and even lent him one of his cars. I was glaring at Brian but he dismissed it.

When we reached Brian's house, we grabbed our bags and went inside. Brian showed Alex his room so he could prepare already and get out. Knowing already the room of Brian, I walked inside and placed my bags in a corner. Unpacking was the last thing I wanted to do. I stripped down to my underwear and lay on the soft comfortable bed. I missed it. I closed my eyes and just basked in the comfort of the bed.

I was feeling so relaxed that it made me jump a little bit when I felt someone nuzzling at my neck. I glanced at my side and Brian was already there. "Already in bed?" He asked me as he spooned me closer.

"I just want a comfortable bed for once." I replied shuffling so I could face him. My neck was straining already from the weird angle it was in. "And your permanent scent on it." I grinned.

"We don't have to do anything, right?" He asked me.

"Nothing for today." I said suggestively as I caressed his side sensually. "Alex left already?" I asked.

"Yeah." Brian answered with a grin.

"What are you waiting for then?" I asked him. Once that was said, he dove for my lips and captured it letting his tongue slip into my mouth. His hands were all over me trying to touch every inch of my bare skin. My hands were traveling along his body as well. And yeah, he was naked as well.

His hand inched closer to my cock and once there, he grasped it and jacked me off slowly making me moan in pleasure. His eyes were just directed to mine and that was just a great turn on for me. It's like I was the only one in the world at that moment. I felt so loved. "Make love to me." I said once our lips parted.

"I don't have a rubber." Brian said out of breath.

I stared at him lovingly. "Do you trust me?" I asked him seriously.

"With my life." Brian replied.

"Good. I trust you too with my life. Forget the rubber." I told him. He returned his lips to mine and another making out session ensued. I let my legs wrap around him giving him more access to my ass. His other hand traveled to my ass and when a finger entered me, it elicited a groan from me and that seemed to motivate Brian and gave my cock a squeeze.

After a few seconds, another finger entered me. I was enjoying it so much and it felt like it was the first time Brian and I made love. I could feel his two fingers move inside me trying to stretch me asshole. Then, another pried inside. He slowly withdrew the three and pushed it back, he repeatedly did that and that made me crazier with passion and lust. "I love you so much." I moaned as I suck at his neck; he was doing the same.

"You ready?" He asked.

"Always for you." I told him cheesily. He smiled and pulled out his three fingers. He sat down facing me as he spat on his hand and massaged his throbbing penis. Combined with the oozing pre-cum and his spit, I knew that it would be easy for him to enter me even if we have no lube. And deep inside me, I felt more turned on because it was just us with no other elements in our lovemaking. Everything came from what we produce naturally.

Brian started to guide his cock to my asshole. I felt the head of his penis at the entrance of my hole. Slowly, Brian pushed and it made me grimace a little bit. I never thought that sex without lube could be this painful. It was like having sex for the first time once again. The head of his penis popped in. He captured my lips once again as he pushed his length in me slowly. If we weren't kissing, I could have screamed from pain but it was still a mind-blowing experience.

Once he was completely inside me, he stopped letting me get used with him inside. After a few seconds, I nodded at him and he slowly pulled out and pushed in once again. He was also hitting my prostate that was making a wave of stimulus in my body. I let myself drown in the pleasure and just basked in the feeling of Brian's lips on mine and his penis inside me.

I didn't know how long but Brian increased his pace. "I'm near." He told me. I was also feeling the familiar tightness in my crotch as his hands sped stroking me.

"Me too." I informed him.

When his motions stopped and his body tensed I knew that he came. I could also feel the shots of cum inside me. It felt wonderful and I was hoping for our next times to be rubber-free. I also reached my climax and ejaculated as his hands continually jerked me off. Once he was done cumming, he laid his head on the crook of my neck breathing hard and I enjoyed the feeling of his skin touching mine and his penis still inside me. I felt complete and felt that it was the most perfect time of the world.

After our steamy lovemaking session, we decided to fix dinner but the problem was that the house was bare. The refrigerator and the pantry were all empty. There's just nothing to eat in the house. We set out for the nearest convenient store to stock up on some necessities like food, drinks and other things needed for the household. We were left in peace in our little shopping and we were thankful about that because we had 6 bags filled with various items. A mob would have been a big problem for us.

When we returned in the house, Alex wasn't there yet. The two of us split the job in putting the items we bought in their places. I was the one assigned in the pantry while Brian filled with refrigerator. We were acting so domesticated that I enjoyed it. I could live life like this and I would be happy with it.

Once done, we started working on dinner. We - well, more on I - prepared a pasta dish. We exchanged some anecdotes while we were chattering and we still learned a lot from each other. There were still many things that I don't know about Brian and he doesn't know many things about me also. Maybe that's how relationship works; you learn each other everyday until the end.

By 7:30pm, we were done and Alex arrived as well. He was carrying a few bags and I assumed that he did some little shopping. "I'll just put this away in my room." Alex said pointing at the bags he was carrying. I nodded and finished preparing the table for dinner. After a minute or two, Alex returned and sat down beside me.

"How's the mall?" I asked him.

"Nothing special. I just bought a few shirts that I liked." Alex replied. "How's sex?" He asked that made me cough a little bit.

"Good." Brian replied. I was so surprised that the two eventually got along greatly. Sometimes, it was scary because they have this same twisted sense of humor that I couldn't understand. Brian handed me a glass of water that I took graciously.

"Only two more concerts right?" Alex asked me.

"Yeah." I answered.

"What will you do after that?" Alex inquired.

I paused for a while thinking about it. "Well, I'll be seeing Tom for a report on my finances and stuff and also about you're schooling." I said pointing at him that elicited a groan from him. "After that, I have no idea. Nick asked me to help with his album but I haven't answered him yet about that one."

"Why didn't I know that?" Brian asked a little bit irritated but I tried to dismiss it.

"I thought that it wasn't important so why bother." I answered nonchalantly. "And I'm not yet sure about that one because he'll be doing some of the work in Europe and I don't wanna go out of the country at the moment."

"Okay." Brian said briefly.

"You don't want me to work with Nick?" I asked him cautiously.

"How can you say that?" Brian snapped.

"Because of your tone." I told him blandly. "Bri, I am not blind. I know that Nick isn't really your favorite person in the world after the album thing."

"If you want to work with him, then fuckin' work with him." Brian said angrily and he stood up and walked away.

"Let's finish our meal. We need to let him cool off." I told Alex who was dumbfounded with what he saw. He just nodded.

Alex and I finished our dinner in silence. I let Alex go to his room and I cleaned up. I needed some time alone after my little argument with Brian. He knows that he has a problem with Nick and it's not healthy. I just hope that Brian would realize that. I hated to see them like that. After cleaning up our mess, I walked around the house looking for Brian but he was I couldn't find him anywhere. He must have gone somewhere. I tried his cell phone but my calls couldn't go in.

I decided to just wait in the den for Brian. I grabbed some blankets and made the couch a little bit more comfortable. I placed myself on the couch and turned on the television via the remote control. "Come home soon." I mumbled as I concentrated on the black and white movie that was being shown.

I heard the gate open but I didn't move from my position and closed the television. I glanced at my watch and it read 12:30am. I waited for Brian to go in the house and observe him if it would even register that I was waiting for him at the sofa.

He was taking up much longer so he must be drunk. I could hear his key struggling in the keyhole and then the door opened. My intuition was correct, Brian was drunk. He closed the door noisily and proceeded to go upstairs. He didn't even see me on the couch and that annoyed me. I planned to help him out but decided to just sleep at the couch until Brian was sober enough.

I laid on the couch and closed my eyes knowing that it's gonna be a fitful sleep. I have too much things going on in my mind and my irritation with Brian was making it more difficult.

"Mart." Brian nudged me that broke my count of jumping sheep in my head. I opened my eyes and saw Brian hovering over me. I didn't say a word and closed my eyes once again. "Not gonna sleep upstairs?" He asked me. I could smell the alcohol from his mouth. I didn't reply. "Fine." Brian grumbled and left me probably to go to sleep in his room. I sighed and slowly opened my eyes. Brian was gone. I just stared at the ceiling thinking everything through. I couldn't believe we just fought because of his feelings for Nick, his supposed best friend, his Frack.

It just seemed like everything was going downward like we're stuck in a black hole where there's no escape. It all started from JIVE's move to give Nick a solo album delaying the next Backstreet album and ruining all the relationships attached to Nick. First was the threesome. I never thought that something like that would break the three apart. They were so in love with each other and it's just an utter surprise to see their love gone, or probably just hidden.

The saddest is the breakdown of the relationship among the members of Backstreet Boys. Brian and Kevin were so against Nick's album but they knew that they couldn't do anything about it. It was the decision of JIVE. Nick was trying his best to live through all the hell and hopefully finish the album and let their lives go back to peaceful and better times. But that's impossible. Everyone knows it. Nothing will be back to where it was.

Will this also break me and Brian apart? Just because of a rift with Nick? It was never in my mental scenarios of breakup scenes. In my head, it was either death of another or cheating by one of us but never because of some relationship with a friend turned sour. Is this the end?


It's the chapter before its end. Yeah, 40 marks the end of Reformation and I might send it tomorrow so watch for it. I'm still trying to think of a nice storyline for the next book in the life of Martin and it won't be as long as the original Reformation. Please send some comments and ideas as well! :-) I'm always happy to hear from y'all.

Thanks to ALL of you who have taken the time and EMAILED me! I truly appreciate it very much. It's really nice to know if there are people who are actually reading what I write.

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EMAIL ADDRESS: windang@softhome.net


A big big "HI" to all my new friends in the Nifty Boyband chatroom, Nifty Writers room, and Crazy!!! There are too many names to mention but I guess Dru, Duckie and CJ are my frequent chatmates! So a big "hello" to the three of you! I wanna give a big shout out to my Danish pals, Chris and Danny. They have always given nice bits of advice to me especially when I felt low. I hope you two won't ever break up! :-) And finally, David!!!! Thank you very much for maintaining the Nifty archives. Without him, we won't be able to read any of the best slash stories.