Date: Sat, 22 Jan 2000 04:26:59 EST From: Brwydevil@aol.com Subject: Boys Bands: Running Thoughts 14 I apologize for the wait on this one but I have been doing a lot since New Year's and it doesn't look like I will be getting any type of real break until March and then I will most likely have a lot going on with school. Ah well- I guess it's not worth complaining about. This story isn't going to be the only part of my personal life that suffers! Lets press on- I must state that everything I write is fictional and borrows only the names of the celebrity bands. All events come from the depths of my imagination. For a full listing of my imaginations contents, contact me at BrwyDevil@aol.com. Running Thoughts Part Fourteen: "All For The Best" Lecture #2 There are no perfect people on Earth. Every single one of us has made mistakes now and again. Sometimes they are done purposefully to see what reaction can be found. Other times (and most often) the mistakes are accidental, unprecipitated and done without intent or malice. The main security that can be found in the human heart is that everyone is capable of forgiveness. If you are able to forgive, true grace and well-being are bestowed upon you. Knowing that someone has done something wrong to you and knowing you can let them go unpunished is a sacrifice and a blessing all at the same time. Forgiveness comes in several forms. For example, if you hear a rumor that your best friend has bashed you verbally behind your back, you could get very injured by this. If you let it bottle up, you will get angry, quickthinking and eventually cold as ice. One action done by someone can harm you for life. It is far better to forgive and move on. You see, there is no reason to make matters worse by holding a grudge. Another example involves two lovers who encounter a stage in their relationship when all they share is petty fighting. Fighting over anything at all. Surprisingly, this is very common in couples. It happens for many reasons (such as testing limitations and boundaries) and puts love on trial. If the couple passes the fights and works out the differences, the verdict is a good one. If they cannot, it wasn't meant to be. There is a quote from a song that states, "No lover's truly faithful, no contracts fully signed". This indicates the judgment that people can never be happy with one person and that trust is a waste of time. I would have to disagree with that assessment. The trials of love can be completely worthwhile and significantly joyous. It merely takes time and adjustment. Forgive those you love- even if it means letting them get away with something horrific. Of course there are lines to be drawn in the sand regarding this act of selflessness. There are psychotic individuals who do not deserve or warrant forgiveness. They are the ones who get a thrill out of seeing you suffer from one thing or another. Forgiveness is something they must beg for. It is a shame that some people miss out on the benefits of humanity, but as I said, no ones perfect. Lucky is he who knows when to forgive and when to draw that line. it may seem like an extremely enlightened sixth sense to be able to distinguish this complex fluctuation of right and wrong, good and evil, but its all common sense in practice. To be shown the way, however, most people are screwed over many times in the process. It is painful and it is sometimes unbearable but if you survive it, you're the winner. If you succeed, you're a better person. As for the line from the song, I don't think that no one is faithful. For my experience, no one is faithful to me, but I've never been unfaithful to them. Am I the exception to the rule or have I yet to find the one true love that will be honest and committed? Those are queries that cannot be answered. As for now, though, I will bask in the glow of the knowledge I have learned and hopefully strive to be a forgiving person. It may seem impossible at first but often after some thought you realize that nothing is impossible. We can all of us forgive. But I doubt any can forget. Let us move on, shall we? ;) ================================================================== New Years Eve was one day away. New York City was still exploding with energy and hype. The Christmas rush turned into the millennium rush automatically. *NSync was still in the city preparing to hop a plane for Hawaii. They had split up and gone home to their families for Christmas weekend, but it was back to work now. Fortunately,however, the BSB were able to take a little break before the year 2000. Nick was sitting in their hotel lobby waiting for Kevin to join him for lunch. They used to spend a lot of time together before life became so recently hectic. For the life of him, Nick couldn't exactly figure out when everything changed. Maybe it was when they met *NSync- or maybe it was before that. He couldn't be certain. The elevator doors opened and Kevin stepped out. He was wearing khaki cargo pants and a loose-fitting grey shirt. He looked a little tired but glad to see Nick. "Sorry I'm late, man. I fell asleep by mistake." "I was gonna send the concierge up to find you if you didn't show in five minutes..." Nick stood and greeted his friend with a hug. "Hungry?" "Always." They walked through the lobby towards the restaurant. It was apparently a place of Japanese style but contained a menu with a little of everything. New York was always a place of diversity. They got a table right away and sat themselves down comfortably. The red menus were placed in front of them and then their waiter walked away. "When does vacation start?" Kevin asked as he opened the menu. "I'm headed home tonight- I don't like spending New Year's alone." "Don't remind me." Kev sipped his water. "What about you?" "I can't get a train till tomorrow." "Really?" Nick put his menu down. Some people said that and couldn't care less. He wanted to show that he was concerned. "If you'd like you could come with me- maybe there's something earlier out by me..." "No, its all right. Howie and Brian are supposed to be coming with me. We have to stop home before we get to our families." "It must not be easy living with Howie and Brian." Nick said. He held his breath after he finished the sentence and quickly looked down at the table. They never usually discussed it. There was a slight pause. "I haven't seen Howie, have you?" Kevin broke the silence. "No but that's not strange. I don't always see him in the hotel." "I guess we're not all one big happy family like our interviews profess." "We're a family- but there's a tinge of dysfunction." Nick smiled. "It wouldn't be realistic any other way!" They both looked down a their menus again and the awkward stillness returned. It was quite uncommon for the two of them to feel reserved around each other. They never had the notion to hide anything from each other. Kevin didn't want to talk about his dreams of AJ and Nick didn't want to talk about his interests in Justin. Little did they know that they had more in common than each anticipated. If they only could lower their defenses they might be able to help each other out. Neither were aware of that, though. "A good bacon cheeseburger is all I ask!" Nick mumbled to himself. "That's all you ever get! Try a different meal for once." "Chicken Parmesan?" "How about something with a vegetable?" Kevin suggested, putting his menu down. "What would I do with a vegetable?" The waitress walked over to them and jumped up and down for a second. Apparently, she had recognized them. Kev grinned and put his hand up to quiet her down. The two superstars autographed her order pad and also wrote down what they wanted beneath their names. She giggled enthusiastically and hopped her way to the kitchen. "I've really gotta start wearing a disguise." Nick laughed. "What makes you think she didn't recognize me!?" Kev retorted happily. "No one recognizes you!" Bantering about who was the cutest and the most talented and so on was common among the boys. It was all in good fun, though. Each were quite good at something and had a specific look that attracted interest from many corners. That was what was good about them all. There was a marketing venue for each one. "I do have something to say about Howie and Brian..." Nick said after a moment. It was obvious that it had been in his mind. Bringing them up again wasn't really necessary. Nick knew that Kevin and the two lovers lived together in California and that the entire band was quite close to each other. It would be best to talk about what was going through his thoughts. Kevin was relieved that Nick was going to discuss a topic that swayed his brain from the situation with AJ. "Well I don't know how to say this..." Kevin swallowed. "I think I know where you're going with this..." "Do you?" "I live with them." Kevin shrugged. "Are you going to tell me that they're closer than friends?" "No, I assumed you knew- but I don't know if they know you know." He completed the tounge-twister. "Why do we have to talk about it?" Kevin asked sipping his water. "Do you have a problem with their lifestyle?" Nick wanted to say, "Far from it- I'm in love with Justin Timberlake and I'd give anything to have him naked and on all fours"- but he decided to say, "No. They're like my brothers. But I think something's wrong." "I'm sure they've just hit a snag in their relationship. It's definitely none of our business." Nick nodded but thought back to what JC had told him in the dressing room. He couldn't keep it bottled up inside of him. "I think Howie's been lying to Brian." he said. "What are you talking about?" Kevin leaned forward and lowered his voice. "I've got no proof or anything like that but I heard that Howie's been seen with another guy." "That's jumping to conclusions..." "He's been seen sneaking a guy into a hotel room." "There could be some explanation." Kevin attempted to defend Howie. "He's been seen sneaking the guy out the next morning- AND it's all happened since Brian and Howie took separate rooms..." Kevin shut his eyes and shook his head. He took a deep breath. "Look, Nick, I don't like hearing about that. Maybe Howie started cheating on Brian and he takes countless strange men to his bed, but until we know it to be true, we can't say a word." Kevin realized the waitress had returned and had a puzzled look on her face. Nick and Kevin both plastered phony grins on their faces and took their plates away from her and waited until she backed away. They just hoped she had no tabloid connections. "I don't want Brian to get hurt." Nick responded. "We have to leave it up to him now. Besides, maybe they broke up and didn't want us to get involved... This could all be a misunderstanding." Nick took a forkful of lettuce and nodded. "It could be..." But he had lost his appetite. ==================================================================== "I had everything in there, Jus." JC moaned as he slumped down onto the bed. "My license, my calendar, my credit cards..." He had looked everywhere for his lost wallet. Losing things is never easy. "Don't worry. It'll turn up- but to be safe, you better suspend your accounts just in case." JC nodded and rubbed his eyes. "Hey- were you on the phone with Nick Carter when I was at the Garden?" "Yeah, I was..." Justin answered cautiously. "It was right after the show was over, right?" "I guess so, why?" "I just thought it was strange. Did he call you?" "JC- are you interrogating me for any reason?" Justin smiled but felt his face heating up. "I'm sorry. It's not my concern... I was just wondering." He got up from the bed and turned on the radio. Justin didn't know why he was so reluctant to tell JC about his interests. Was he afraid of the response? Was he lost in his own diluted confusion? Or was the love he was developing for Nick clouding his judgment? He wished he could tell JC despite the rest of his reservations. What was the worst that could happen? "JC..." Justin said. He looked at his friend and cracked his knuckles nervously. "I called Nick that day." JC nodded. His expression showed he was confused. "Okay... It's not a big thing. I just thought it was peculiar." "Why?" "You only met a little while ago and we worked on stage together for one performance. I didn't realize that was enough time to grow so chummy." "How long does it usually take?" "Look, Justin, man... Its not an attack or anything. If you're friends, then good for you! I've just never seen two people who just met get so excited about calling each other." Justin didn't exactly see the point but maybe he was noticeably different around the guys in his band. Love tended to affect people that way. Walking on air and the like. "Nick and I did a lot of talking during the rehearsal and since the show..." "I think its great! Publicity wise, everyone will be glad we have no major rivalries." JC smiled- trying to muffle his aggravation towards AJ's initials. "No. No rivalries." "So what do you talk about?" "Huh?" JC shut off the radio now and lounged on the edge of the bed. "You and Nick... you became good friends fast- what have you talked about?" "Oh geez... I dunno. JC, its a little more complicated than that!" JC wasn't surprised to hear it but he wasn't sure what to think completely or what to say next. "Tell me what you're trying to tell me." JC gestured with his hand. His voice was calm and expectant. "Nick and I have a lot in common." "Yeah?" That seemed a little obvious. Both the youngest members in superstar music groups. Did you need to go any deeper than that? Aside from the fact that they were both gay, too... "We always have something to say to each other. We haven't been able to spend much time together due to schedules- but when we can, we do plan to." "I guess it just struck me wrong. I'm glad you found him." "I am too." Justin said. He couldn't find a good way to mention, "Oh we want to be lovers too!" so he just sat down across from JC. There was a moment's silence. ~This is ridiculous!~ Justin told himself. ~Just tell him! You'll have to do it sooner or later!~ "I'm actually going out tonight to say goodbye to Nick." JC was still lost but he was sure that Justin was tap-dancing around something. He decided to press on. "You're going out with him in order to say... goodbye?" JC shook his head. "Are you dying?" Justin let himself laugh to relieve a little of the tension at the pit of his stomach. "No, JC... our group is going to be in Hawaii for the beginning of January... I want him to know I'll be thinking of him." He said quickly. "Stop me if I'm wrong, but you usually don't need to have an evening alone with your brand new friend before going on a trip- unless I missed a memo..." "That's what I'm trying to tell you..." Justin bursted. He ran his hand through the bushy curls that had recently grown out of control. "Nick and I-" Gosh he said that a lot- "instantly clicked... When I say we have a lot in common, I mean A LOT." He felt himself on the edge of a cliff. No turning back. "We're more than friends." JC just looked at him with an expressionless mask. This next reaction was the one Justin was waiting for. And it was taking forever. Finally JC nodded. Justin bit the inside of his lower lip. "You're setting yourself up for disaster, bud." JC said. "Is that your advice to me?" "Its fate. I can foresee pain." Justin smiled. "You could be supportive." "You're right." JC stood up and walked over to the mini-bar. "I want you to be happy- so use your head, okay?" "I like that advice a little bit more." Justin crossed his arms. "Not much more... but more." "You know what you're doing. I'm just being a voice of reason." "I'm being reasonable. Just lost in love..." "Some people might argue that those are two contradictory statements!" JC tried not to smile and he wanted to seem like an educated wise-man. It didn't come off that well. "So you love him?" Justin thought for a moment. "I could love him." "As soon as you do- there's no turning back." Justin and JC looked at each other. The strong winds on the outside of the hotel whizzed quickly past the window. The silence was thick. JC took a sip of soda he had taken from the minifridge. "There is a statistic that one in every five men is gay." JC said. "*NSync and the BackStreet Boys were hired as individuals and put together to sing." He continued. "I think its amazing that the gay men in the groups out number the straight ones. Those odds are astronomical!" "It makes you think, doesn't it?" Justin grinned as he stood up. "About what you could be missing if you decided to be gay..." ========================================================================== Chris read an article that listed him as the most outspoken member of *NSync. He smiled as he thumbed through the magazine. It had taken him a long time to realize it, but he did appear smart in front of his audiences. He might have believed himself to be shy and introverted- but in all actuality, his knowledge and his true personality had been seen by everyone. He always wanted to be looked upon as more than a back-up singer and this article finally gave him that deserved placement. He felt relieved. It was a major concern in his life. Just because you get famous doesn't mean you run out of problems. The public eye will always bring more situations that affect you and need to be dealt with... He didn't mind paying that price. Joey walked into the room wearing a black bathrobe. He was running an electric razor across his cheeks. "The pink dye is fading fast... I'm gonna have to buy some more soon." He hummed. Chris nodded and decided not to say a word about his friend's color choice. He tossed the magazine across the bed and laid back. "I think we should start demanding separate rooms on these tours, Joe." "You don't like rooming with me, boy?" Joey pretended to be insulted and clutched his chest dramatically. He laughed to himself, turned around and took off his robe. Chris ignored his naked bandmember and sighed. "I'm just saying that privacy and personal space could benefit us all..." "Maybe. I like company." Joey pulled on some boxer shorts and sat down. "I'm sure if we talk to the managers, we can get you your own pad... I'll get over it." "Don't take it personally!" Chris grinned as they heard a knock on the door. Joey's brow furrowed. It was rather late for anyone to be stopping by. He quickly pulled some pants on and walked to the door. He opened it partially to check who it was. The hallway was empty. He looked around and finally spotted a manilla envelope at his feet. Joey glanced down the hallway and leaned over to pick up the strange package. He slowly examined it and stepped inside the hotel room. "I think we got ourselves another secret admirer..." Chris sat up quickly. He was skeptical and suspicious. Ever since their stalker had returned, he had tried to avoid recieving odd letters. Who knew what they could contain. He walked over to Joey and took the envelope away. "We need to be careful. Remember... not all of our fans are normal individuals!" "Chris, man, you gotta chill out." Joey smiled and tried to take the package back. "One of these days, we're gonna get killed by some mail bomb if we aren't careful, Joe." Chris looked his friend right in the eyes. "Trust me, all right?" "So what do you want us to do? Call in the bomb squad whenever the mailman is passed?" "Seriously, thats not a bad idea!" Joey faked left and yanked the envelope out of Chris' right hand. He smiled and jumped up onto the bed. "We're too young to be so paranoid!" He tore at the edge of the paper and looked at Chris with a pleased look on his face. The place had not exploded. "I am just saying that it's better to be safe than sorry." "No, Chris... we wouldn't be sorry. We'd be dead!" Joey pulled a sheet of paper out. It appeared blank. He was very confused. Chris took it from him slowly and looked down at the mysterious page. "What's this?" Joey asked. "I think I know what's going on." Chris said in a soft voice as he nodded. He slowly walked over towards the dorway. "Aren't you going to tell me?" Joey asked as he jumped off the bed. Chris held the invisible paper up to his friend and flicked off the light switch. In the dark, words appeared on the paper in a greenish ink. Their stalker had used it before... but never without another message that went with it. They were meant to think about this one. The paper said, "I'm On My Way". "This is just stupid!" Joey ripped the words away from Chris. In the dark it appeared as if the letters were just dancing around by themselves. Chris turned back on the lights and had a very concerned look on his face. Joey took notice of it right away and shook his head. "We've got some psycho on our trail and only we are recieving her little letters. We need to tell the other guys and make sure she can't follow us anymore." Chris didn't want to think that Joey was scared, but it didn't seem to look any other way. Having something like this happen was definetly freaky- but there was no real way to stop it. If they couldn't find out who did it, then how could they put an end to it? "I am not going to tell the others. Its not our place to get them all worried..." "But they're all involved. We're one band... this stalker is after all of us." Joey crumpled the paper up and threw it towards the window angrily. "If the stalker wanted Justin or Lance or JC to get a note, then they would have gotten one. For some reason, it is just us. And if it is going to be stopped- we're the one's who have to do it!" Chris spoke in a voice that seemed as if he was convincing himself as much as his friend. "Then what are we going to do?" "We're going to hotel security to see who's been admitted into the building." Chris announced. "And if that doesn't work, we will need to think back to every time we recieved a letter and see if there are any common elements involved that could lead us to some clues." "Who are you? Sherlock- Fucking- Holmes or something?" Joey retorted. "Got any better ideas?" "I'll be Watson..." He answered mindlessly. The peeked out into the hallway catiously and then crept their way over to the elevators and headed down to the lobby. ========================================================================== The cold night air passed Nick as he stood on the corner of 42nd street and Broadway. A large Disney store towered above him as he shivered in the frigid temperature. It was nice to see the empire of Mickey Mouse enveloping everything from Broadway theatres to cab dashboards. Actually, it was exceedingly frightening... No one seemed to notice him standing there by himself. He was quite grateful for the wintertime. We could dress as bundled as he wanted and no one would give him a second glance. It was usually when he had to wear sweatshirts and hoods in August that people got suspicious. Justin had asked him to meet there at 10PM. It was the first time they were going to be together outside of the entire group. They had spent a lot of time over the phone with each other, but nothing came close to actually seeing him. He felt butterflies in his stomach. What was he getting himself into? Was this really worth the effort? He was falling in love with someone he was never going to get to see. He was going to have to keep it a secret to even the closest people to him. It was all swirling around in his mind when he turned his back to the Disney Store and saw Justin walking towards him. He felt everything around him slow down. He watched that smile grow across the boy's face. Justin was dressed in all black except for a lime green scarf that was puffing out the top of his pea-coat. It was as if no one else existed around them. Nick honestly felt five degrees warmer just knowing Justin was soon going to be next to him. All doubts and ideas of disaster flew from his head. His eyes delved right into the man of his dreams and soon, they were face to face. "Sorry I'm late..." Justin grinned. "It takes forever to sneak out of a hotel!" "Don't worry about it. I'm glad you're here now." Nick said in a low voice. A tall man knocked into him as they walked down the street, but he didn't turn to ask for an apology. He just wanted to keep up the pace that Justin had started. "I really don't have anywhere in particular to go... I just know that I won't be seeing you for a long while... I think its the American Music Awards in the middle of the month or something..." "I know. We're both busy guys." Justin spoke as he walked forward, keeping his eyes ahead. Nick, however, was intently watching the star next to him. (Little did he realize that he was also a star...) They walked down 42nd Street until they came to 2nd Avenue. They didn't say much but they always caught each other looking into their faces. Eventually they were both just laughing. "We usually have plenty to say over the phone..." Nick giggled. "Well maybe this is just a little awkward, or something." Justin whispered back. "I mean, we are together now, in public... Any number of people could recognize both of us. I guess we're a little intimidated." They found their way into a tiny coffee shop and sat down. Everyone inside was enjoying their own conversation and paid no attention to the new patrons. Nick ordered a large hot chocolate and Justin got himself some tea. They took off a few of the layers that was taking the brunt of the worst of the weather and got comfortable. As soon as they were ready to just sit together, Nick looked directly into Justin's eyes and gave the most sweetest and innocent face ever imagined. Justin instantly grinned back. He kept his voice low and said, "When did you get so damn cute?" "I'm not the cute one! You are!" Nick answered sheepishly. "Oh it's gonna be like that?" Justin chuckled. "We'll have one hell of a relationship if we can't share the titles!" "Well.. How about I think you're the cute one and you think I'm the cute one?" Nick sipped his beverage and attempted to compromise. "I'll let you know. But I don't think we can break my spirits that easily. You have got to be the most adorable thing I have ever seen..." "And you have got to be the hottest thing I have ever seen. Especially in those leather pants you had at the concert... I had to keep myself focused." Justin leaned forward. "Was I exciting you?" "You always excite me..." "That's healthy. I am sure there's some way I can ease that..." Justin licked his stirrer seductively and placed it gently down on the table. Nick eyes him hungrily and smiled. "You're unstoppable." "It's our age group... Hormones are out of control. I can't help myself." Justin attempted to look innocent. "I'm sure there's some way I can make it up to you." This flirtatious diatribe went on for quite some time. Nick completed his frothy chocolate drink and Justin was on his second cup of tea before their conversation drifted away from innuendo and into strict intellect. It was always nice to have a release of tension with sexual chatter- but it can never be the entire conversation. "I'm sorry we can't spend more time together." Justin said. "Well, we don't want to rush anything, right?" "To be honest, I don't know what we have here, Nick." Nick loved hearing his name come out of Justin's mouth. It sounded so sweet and unique. It sounded loved. "We're two people who finally found each other. We can work out the details of what that means later..." Nick quickly brushed his fingertips across Justin's hand as he said this and made sure no one had noticed. Their eyes met again and they instantly smiled. Fireworks. They were moving rather quickly- but that was not always a sign of trouble. They were awfully young and they didn't realize the kind of hardship they were about to enter as soon as they took on the responsibilities of being in a relationship- but the future is all about surprises and making up for mistakes. As soon as you are done learning and you have made up for all you had done wrong, death is the only thing left to experience. The two boys bundled back up and exchanged gloves as a little token of each other. They reentered the winter wonderland and made their way back up 42nd Street. They had spoken for such a long time that they lost track of the clock. It was nearly 2AM by the time they got back into Times Square. It was surprisingly still. There was still a lot of people around, but everything appeared more serene. Justin stopped in front of an electronics store on Broadway and turned to Nick. It was a densely populated area and everyone passed them by without a second glance. "Do you need to tie your shoe or something?" Nick asked. Justin shook his head and smiled. He just looked into Nick's face as if he were searching for something. "I am leaving for Hawaii in a few hours... I want to remember you just like this." He answered. Nick was surrounded by a blue and white neon glow from a mixture of billboards behind him. His hair seemed to vibrantly shimmer amid the crisp metropolitan air. Deep purple clouds vanished behind towering skyscrapers and a half moon tried desperately to be seen past the garish blinding light of the city blocks. Justin reached over and stroked a few strands of hair away from Nick's brow. It was a very uncharacteristally forward action. He realized what he had done and drew his hand back. "I'm sorry. I know Public Displays Of Affection are offlimits..." "They're A-Okay as long as no one is snapping pictures." Nick responded. They continued their walk until they were in front of the Marriot Hotel. *NSync was booked in here and Justin turned back to Justin. They were both standing in the parking garage beneath the building and away from the quasi-busy streets. No one else was around. "I'm going to miss you," Nick said, trying not to make eye contact. "There's something I want to do... but I don't want to go too fast for us." Justin admitted. He, too, appeared to be holding back. There was a moment of silence and Nick looked up into the eyes of his man. His heart was racing. he didn't know why. He probably didn't want to say goodbye. This was their first time out together and it felt like it had rushed by. Justin leaned forward and his warm lips met with Nick's. They both gasped and realized they were sharing their first real intimate moment as a couple. And it was outdoors- capable of being seen by anyone. Nick leaned into Justin's embrace and let his lower lip slide over Justin's. They felt each other's warm breath escaping from their noses. Neither wanted to part, but after a long ten seconds, Justin pulled back and blushed. "Was that too fast?" He asked after a second. The rushing wind echoed along the parking garage walls. "I think it was right on time." Nick answered, short of breath. Justin extended his hand and they touched one last time before he turned around and headed for the elevator. As soon as Justin was no longer in sight, Nick nearly exploded with joy. He looked around for someone to share his ecstatic enthustiasm with but no one was in sight. He imagined that was a good thing... Nick turned away from the Marriot and placed Justin's gloves in his pocket. He was cold, but he knew a good jog would do him some good. That kiss had been amazing for him. Fans across the country wanted to know what it was like to kiss Justin Timberlake- and he had just done it! It was so sweet and simple and warm and passionate. He couldn't describe the energy that surged trough him. He only wondered if Justin felt as good about it as he did. Nick didn't stop wondering about it until he had jogged all the way back to his hotel- yet his body had not fatigued in the slightest. ============================================================================= AJ stared into Kevin's eyes. He had to get it off his chest. He had been able to live his life normally until his mind was interrupted by the thought of Kevin. He had never thought of himself as being gay. He had slept with more women than a Lucille Roberts commercial. This strange sensation was plaguing his mind. "I can't get you out of my mind!" AJ put his hand on Kevin's shoulder. He was surprised to feel how muscular his friend was. The dark goatee on Kevin's face made him look very angular and extremely sensual. His dark eyes probed into AJ's face, looking for some sign of what he was trying to say. They looked at each other. AJ didn't complete his statement. Kevin moved closer and let AJ's arm wrap around him. He hesitated for a moment but finally leaned in for a kiss. He felt the smooth lips of AJ part his own and a warm slick tongue entered his mouth. He shivered. It was finally happening. The dreams and visions that he had hoped for were coming true. He let his own arms pull AJ in closer. They embraced as they made out. AJ moved his left arm up Kevin's body and caressed the back of his neck. He had never kissed anyone like that before. The passion and intensity was second to none. Kevin's return lip service was equally impressive. Their tongues fit together perfectly with each other and rubbed together hungrily. They separated from each other and opened their eyes slowly. They looked into each others souls and deciphered exactly what they desired most. Kevin began to kiss down AJ's neck. He felt a little reluctance in AJ, so he stopped and looked back into his eyes. "We shouldn't do this, Kev..." AJ whispered. Their two faces were extremely close to one another. "It's going to get weird. We work together. Don't you think we should draw the like there?" Kevin's hot breath cascaded on AJ's face. They were so close that they felt both of their hearts beating as one. Kevin shivered once again and AJ's arms pulled him in once again. "Then again..." AJ said, "What if we're meant to be together?" He smiled and pulled Kevin down onto the bed. Their hard cocks pressed into each other and both boys moaned aloud at their first contact. Kevin laid on his back and looked up at AJ who was looking right down at him. He grinded his hips upward and felt the muscular body of AJ meeting his every movement. Their hard-ons pulsed in anticipation and yearned for release. Kevin unbuttoned AJ's maroon polo shirt and pulled it off. He ran his fingertips along the defined muscles and felt himself moan again in awe at the incredible physical shape his new lover was in. AJ was already aware of his body and was more interested in Kevin. He undid the buttons on his grey shirt and parted the two sides in order to look at the naked chest. He smiled and placed the palms of his hands on Kev's chest. He moved his hands onto the abs and then down to the waistline of the khakis he was wearing. He lowered himself down on top of Kevin and their lips met again. Their bodies touched and their smooth skin rubbed together. They were both warm and on the verge of sweating. Kevin kissed AJ erotically and let his tongue run down his chin and to the underside of his neck. He pushed AJ back up. AJ instantly wrapped his legs around Kevin's waist and continued the kiss. Their noses brushed each other in a mini-eskimo kiss and they both smiled. AJ stood up on the bed and looked down at Kevin who was crotch level. Kevin licked his lips and grinned seductively. He reached up and took off AJ's belt. He was breathing heavily as he undid the button fly and ran his left hand around the flawless waist. The front of AJ's pants were soon open and a pair of polka dot boxers were exposed. Kevin nodded at the amusing choice of undergear. AJ seemed slightly embarrassed and said, "If I knew this was going to happen I would have chosen a more masculine pattern..." They both chuckled and Kevin moved his right hand up AJ's strokable chest and onto his neck. AJ tilted his head downward and licked at Kevin's fingers. Kevin bit his lower lip and closed his eyes. AJ's tongue twirled around the index finger. Kevin used his other hand to reach into AJ's pants and feel the full grown member restrained by the cloth of his boxer shorts. The thick shaft jerked slightly as he touched it. AJ stopped sucking on the bandmembers fingers and let his pants fall down to his ankles. He jumped off the bed and kicked the trousers away. He kised Kevin again as he unzipped the khaki pants he was wearing and grabbed hold of the penis in the constricting briefs. They were both down to their underwear and socks and AJ rejoined Kevin on the bed. The passion was building and Kev didn't know how much longer he would be able to take it. The fantasies were overwhelming and now that he was actually doing it, the excitement made him feel some premature thoughts. AJ had never been with another man before... as a matter of fact, he had never eve considered sex with any other male besides Kevin. He found that strange, but it was just the way it was. Kevin's hand made it's way down the front of AJ's waistline and his skin finally touched AJ's dick. It was long and smooth and very aroused. Pre-cum had already begun to flow. He couldn't hold himself back, so he turned his body around and came face to face with the crotch. He pulled the elastic away and saw the penis. He moaned just by seeing it and instinctively licked the head. AJ moved his hips upward and whispered Kevin's name. Kevin turned his head upward slightly and took the cock into his mouth. The enveloped member connected to AJ's body pulsed and Kevin slid more of it into his awaiting throat. AJ sighed heavily and turned his head to the left. He saw that Kevin had turned his body around and was laying in a 69 position. The urges were so powerful, he immediately reached over to Kevin's breifs and pulled them away. He had never done anything like this before, but he closed his eyes and took the shaft into his warm mouth. Kevin was very surprised to feel this and stopped his licking to see what AJ had done. It was so hot to see his fellow singer eagerly giving him a blowjob. Almost all of his penis disappeared into AJ's mouth. He went back to the attention he was giving little AJ and began to jerk him off- using saliva as a lubricant. His head bobbed up and down into AJ's lap until he felt his own body give way to the amazing techniques that the tongue and lips of AJ were performing on him. He moaned quickly and jutted his hips into AJ's face. He released a load of cum into AJ's awaiting mouth and continued sucking on the rod before him. AJ's hand guided Kevin's head as he pumped into him. His moans increased in volume and density as he neared his climaz. Kevin came up for air for a moment and continued massaging the shaft quickly. He looked up at the intense expression on AJ and said, "I love you." AJ sighed as he pumped his dick into Kevin's hand and came. His eyes clenched shut and his mouth shot open. His orgasm ceased and he looked into Kevin's pleasing eyes. He had just told him he loved him. He had heard that from countless fans after sleeping with them... but this was different. This was amazing. This was special. He opened his mouth to return the intention but only a loud buzzing sound came out. He was quite confused and tried to speak again. The incessant buzzing started again. He sat up. AJ awoke from the dream and stared around the room in disbelief. ============================================================================== ============= Okay... yet another chapter to munch on. This one was a little longer... but I guess that happens when storylines develop. I find it amazing that the BackStreet Boys and *NSync have such vivid and powerful dreams, don't you? I can never remember my dreams- nor do many of them mean anything. Ahhh... the power of fiction! Contact me at BrwyDevil@aol.com for any reason at all. Happy Reading.