Date: Mon, 6 Jan 2003 15:12:56 +0000 (GMT) From: Jezebel Subject: Set Adrift: Nick in New York Nick in New York. (Part of the Set Adrift Universe) Disclaimers: This is fiction. Ben and Sully are figments of my imagination and The Backstreet Boys are strangers to me and not gay. This is for adults only. Notes: This is an interlude in the "Set Adrift" universe. --- As with all stories there was no real happily ever after for Nick and Ben, they had shared a moment where Ben had agreed to be more than friends and then they had slept on it. When Nick woke up there was an empty spot next to him in the bed that he had shared with Ben and a note that his friend was returning to New York. For most of that day while he travelled to the next destination on the tour Nick had worried that there was something wrong, at least until Ben had called him. >From then on things had worked out. Sure, Nick was on tour, and Ben was in New York still, but the pair were friends and the love between them was growing a little each day. Ben had begun to open up to Nick a little and told him more about himself, and Nick had returned the favour, telling Ben the secret things about him that no one else knew. When the Backstreet Boys got three days off from the tour, Nick's first thought was of Ben. And here he was in New York to visit his friend. Sully and Alex were off getting reacquainted and spending some quality time together, Kevin and Brian were doing the same with their wives, and Howie was off with his sister doing something for the Dorough foundation. Nick didn't know much more than that, he was only thinking of one thing. Ben. *** Ben Maloney had not really thought of much else other than Nick Carter in the last three weeks since he had walked away from the tour. It had seemed like the right thing to do at the time, he knew that he needed some time to think things over and he definitely needed some time to sort out his own feelings, but Ben was surprised at how much he missed his friend. His life was a lot less hectic than it had been, Ben still went out, but he never went home with strangers or picked up other men, instead he would come back after a night of dancing or a meal out with friends and call Nick. These days that was enough. Ben was on his way in from another night out when he saw the shadowed figure sitting on the stoop outside his building. Ben wasn't too worried, after all, it could just be someone that had forgotten their key. It was only as he got closer that he realised who it really was. Nick hadn't called him to tell him that he was coming by, if he had then there was no way that Ben would have gone out and left his friend waiting on the doorstep, not when Nick was an international popstar and likely to get mobbed in any neighbourhood. Ben hoped that he had not been recognised. "Surprise." Nick said with a small smile as he looked up at Ben. He looked cold, as if he had been waiting in the cool night air for a while now, and Ben wondered just how long he had been there. "I thought I would drop by for a visit." "I'm sorry." Ben said. "If I had known you were coming by I would have stayed home." "It wouldn't have been much of a surprise then would it?" Nick asked, Ben was glad that he was still able to laugh about it. "I guess not." Ben said. Nick didn't respond and Ben realised just how cold his lover must be in just his leather jacket and with the bag that he had been sitting on. "Sorry." Ben said as he quickly reached for his keys and opened the door. Nick followed him in and up the stairs to Ben's apartment. He was glad to finally be inside but part of him was wondering how Ben really felt to see him there. One of the reasons that Nick had surprised his lover was so that Ben could not find some excuse to back out of their relationship. He knew that it was a little dishonest but Nick was still worried that Ben did not feel that he deserved this. There was one thing for them to continue their relationship over the phone and in brief calls each night, but visits were something else. Nick hoped that he could teach Ben a little more about love in his brief visit. "Did you want a drink or something?" Ben asked nervously as he hovered around still unsure of what to do now that Nick was there. It was a little worrying for Nick that Ben seemed so nervous around him, but he hoped that he could make up for that with a little bit of extra love and some hope. "Something." Nick said sweetly as he moved closer to Ben and reached for a hug. "Your hands are cold." Ben said with a soft smile and Nick slid his hands up Ben's back underneath his T-shirt. Usually a move like this was a precursor for Sex, but it didn't feel like it this time. Nick didn't move his hands, just left them on Ben's back and didn't make a move to touch him anywhere else or undress him further. It was nice and Ben didn't mind sharing body heat with Nick, especially not when he was used to sharing much more with so many men. "We should get some rest." Ben said softly as he began to wonder how much longer they could stand in the embrace. "You may have time off but some of us still have to work tommorow." Nick smiled softly, Ben didn't have to work, he had money from an inheritence that paid him just enough to live on. But Ben still worked anyway, volunteering at a charity three days a week. He pulled back slightly but left one arm around Ben's waist. "Okay, you want to show me where I can sleep?" Nick asked. Ben eyed him oddly, as if he was watching an alien. Usually the men in his life didn't ask where to sleep, they just followed him to bed. Ben hoped that Nick would do the same. "Nicky, there is only one room. You'll have to bunk down with me." Ben said with a soft smile. "It wouldn't be the first time." "At least it's bigger than the beds on the bus." Nick said when he saw the King Size bed that took up most of Ben's small bedroom. "At least you don't snore." Ben replied. Nick smiled at that, as if it was some acceptance of his place at Ben's side. He placed the bag that he had carried in with him to one side and began to undress. Outwardly he was not really showing any emotion but inside he was shaking. He could still hardly believe that he was there with Ben or that Ben was there with him. "I usually sleep on the left." Ben said as he took Nick's lead and began to undress, he was careful to leave on his shorts and T-shirt because he didn't want to make Nick feel subconcious. He didn't like to tell Nick that he also usually slept naked. "Cool." Nick said as he turned down the comforter on the bed and climbed in to the right side. Ben slid in beside him and tensed slightly as he was unsure of what to do. When he felt Nick's arms wrap around him he relaxed into the embrace. "I'm glad that you're here." Ben said, and it was the truth. It felt right to be in Nick's arms after so long sleeping alone, this felt like home. Despite all of the other men that had been in his bed or whose bed he had been in it had never been just enough to lay there and take in the love, perhaps because this was the first time that he had ever really felt that level of love in such a simple gesture. Nick placed a gentle kiss on Ben's shoulder and then settled down to sleep. He had missed Ben but there was time for everything else, for now all he wanted to do was hold his lover and share in his life. That was enough for him. *** "Wake up sleepyhead." Ben called happily as he waved the cup of coffee under Nick's nose early the next morning. Nick groaned, grabbed the pillow and buried his head underneath it. Then he slowly realised who it was that was calling him. Ben nearly lost his balance and spilled hot coffee on himself when Nick bolted upright in his bed. "Ben?" Nick asked suddenly fully awake. It took him a moment to realise where he was. When he realised he smiled. "Morning." "Jeez, you could give a guy a little warning that you wake that quickly. I nearly did myself an injury." Ben joked. He handed over his coffee and was glad when Nick didn't complain, he wasn't sure how the other man took it but it seemed that black was okay. "So, what are you doing up so early?" Nick asked. "Come back to bed." "Nick, you know that I have work." Ben said patiently. "I told you that last night." "So?" Nick said. "Call them up and tell them that you can't go in. Stay here with me instead. It's not like you get paid to be there." Ben shook his head. "And would you do that to a radio station that were expecting an interview, or maybe a hospital of sick kids that you were expected to visit?" he asked, of course Ben knew that the answer was no. "They're expecting me today, and I can't just let them down. I'll understand if you want to stay here." "No." Nick said. "I'd like to come with you if I may." "Sure. We can always do with an extra pair of hands." Ben replied. "Now, go get in the shower. We have to be out soon." It was only then that Nick realised that Ben was already dressed and ready for the day. He threw back the covers, and got out of bed. He was surprised at how much he was looking forward to the day ahead. *** "Work" for Ben turned out to be a drop in centre where he volunteered three days a week. Nick had known that Ben was a charity worker, but not what it was that he did until he went out with him that day. Ben worked at a drop in centre for teens, he was a counsellor there. He was open with them about who he was and had helped one or two come to terms with their own sexuality. Ben also spoke on the importance of safe sex, handed out condoms and did whatever was needed to help the kids that for whatever reason wanted someone to talk to. "A lot of the time it is just a case of being a friend to these kids." Ben said. "God, I call them kids and we're not much older than them." Ben laughed. "Sometimes it is amazing what a few years can do." Nick replied. He wasn't really talking about anything specific, but he had grown up with four older brothers that had been counsellor and mentor to him. He knew what it was like to look up to someone only a few years older. "Yeah." Ben said. He could put that to his relationship with Nick. A few years ago they had been a one night stand, back then he never would have thought of anything more than that, but now he and Nick were in the beginning stages of a relationship. "Isn't it a little quiet during the day?" Nick asked. "I mean, the kids are in school." "Not all of them." Ben replied. "Some don't go, others were kicked out. We don't judge them for that, we try to get them back in school but it doesn't always work." Nick saw a slight flash of Ben's soul in his eyes as he spoke the words. He cared for these kids and Nick could see that now. "So, other than listening to them, I guess you just hang out?" Nick asked. "That's about it." Ben agreed. Nick realised that this was not so much work but it was still something that Ben took seriously. He admired his lover for that and realised that he could probably learn a lot from Ben. He was about to say so when a couple of kids walked in, shucking coats and hanging them up before waving to Ben. A few minutes later some others arrived and Nick watched as Ben went to open the tuck shop and deal with someone that looked as if they needed to talk to someone. Nick wondered if this was how it always was. He guessed that he would learn soon enough. Three hours later they were joined by yet more kids as one of the schools let out, some of the older teens disappeared after that, perhaps not wanting to be around the younger ones and Nick found himself confronted with three young girls who seemed to know who he was immediately. "Oh My God..." One of them said. "You're Nick Carter." Nick smiled, he didn't like to point out that he was already aware of that fact, because it had been his name for over twenty years. Instead he smiled sweetly, apologised to the boy that he had been playing pool with and turned to speak with the girls. "Hi." He said sweetly. "What are you doing here?" "Yeah, what do you want in a dump like this? I swear if I could get out of here I would." Another girl said. "It's probably just a publicity thing." An older girl commented. It was obvious that she had known who he was but was not taken in by it at all. "You know, trying to look good for the press. Must have a new album coming out soon or something." "Shut up Shaz." The third younger girl said. "Don't listen to her." "Well, I'm really just here hanging out." Nick said. "There isn't anyone else that knows I'm here, I just came by to visit Ben and he thought that I might be helpful around here." "You know Ben? Our Ben?" The young girl asked excitedly. "Sure." A voice behind them said. Nick turned and was pleased to see that Ben was there. "Nick and I are old friends." "Wow." One of the three young girls said. "Do you know AJ too? He's cute." Nick laughed slightly at that. "Sure, I know Alex." Ben said. "He's not here this trip though." He added quickly as she looked as if she was going to faint or something. "But I'm sure if you ask Nick nicely he'll talk him into coming next time." Nick groaned, he hoped that word did not get out that this was a hang out for the Backstreet Boys. If it did then he would not be able to visit again. "Will you play something for us?" The girl asked. Nick thought about it for a moment, not sure if he could or not. A guitar appeared from somewhere and he was roped into a singalong. By the end of the evening his fingers were sore from playing but he had to admit that it was what he needed, it certainly reminded him of what he did this for. The girls were more surprised that the other boys that came by were willing to join in and a few even had their own guitars or instruments. Ben was glad that it had worked out well and smiled as he saw how happy his lover was. The kids grumbled about having to go that evening and Ben didn't even want to tell Nick that they were already 2 hours over their hours. He wasn't sure that Nick had noticed the other volunteers arriving either. They left soon after the kids, leaving it to the other volunteers to tidy up and headed out for something to eat. Ben had to admit that staying late was not a part of his plans, but then neither was having Nick with him. He was supposed to be meeting some old friends for a meal but had already called to cancel earlier. He was glad now that he had. Nick was too energised for anything too sedate and instead they grabbed a burger. "So, Home?" Ben asked. "No, I'm too hyped to go home." Nick replied. "No." Ben laughed. "I meant do you want to go to the club?" "Oh, you mean Sully's club." Nick said, laughing as he realised his mistake. That was the name of the club, not a suggestion that they should return to Ben's apartment. "Sure, I could do with dancing. But we're not exactly dressed for it." "Nicky, you know the owner, you don't need to meet the dress code." Ben said. "Besides, you look fine." "Okay." Nick agreed. He was wearing jeans and a shirt, it wasn't that respectable but it wasn't bad either. Usually when he went out he had a selection of shirts that he wore, but this plain one would have to do. Ben was similarly dressed, so they would probably be okay. Ben should know after all. The club brought back a lot of memories for Nick, but it was good to be back there. They weren't all bad memories and he was glad that they were going somewhere that he at least knew. "It feels odd bringing you here." Ben admitted as they entered the club. "For years I remember Drew saying that you couldn't be seen here. It was almost as if you were barred. Of course now I know that he was protecting Sully..." "You miss him, don't you?" "Sully?" Ben asked, avoiding the question. Nick didn't laugh. "Yeah, I miss Drew." "What do you think he would think of us?" Nick asked. He hoped that it was a good answer. Ben smiled. "He always told me that I'd meet someone that would make me want to change my ways." Ben replied. "Just like he did in Sully." "You don't have to change for me." Nick said softly. "I do." Ben replied. "But it's okay, because I don't mind changing for you." "Are we dancing?" Nick asked, sensing that the conversation was about to hit rocky ground. "Yeah." Ben agreed. "But only if I get a little grope in as well." "Only a little?" Nick asked, raising an eyebrow. Ben laughed and led him out to the dance floor. They dance for what seemed like hours before finally heading home. Nick laughed as Ben fumbled with the door, desperate to get them in before Nick sang out loud again. It had been a good night, lots of singing, dancing and drinking but now they were on their way home and Ben was wondering if Nick was always this rowdy when he went out for a drink. Maybe it was not that, it was just that he was happy. "I love you." Nick said as he threw an arm around Ben's shoulders, not seeming to care that they were in public or that he was trying to open the door. "I love you too." Ben admitted distractedly. He finally managed to get the door open and pulled Nick inside. Nick fell against the wall and laughed as Ben shut the outside world out and then leaned in for a small kiss. "Now, lets get you to bed." Ben said indulgently. He knew that Nick was more than a little drunk and that he just needed to sleep it off. "Are you coming onto me?" Nick asked. "You're drunk." Ben said with a slight laugh as he stumbled to the bedroom with Nick clinging to him. "You're beautiful." Nick replied lovingly as he gave Ben a sloppy kiss. Ben smiled and put Nick on the bed. He was about to help Nick undress and get into bed, but by the time he managed that Nick was already snoring his head off. Oh well, so much for worrying about Nick wanting him that night. Ben shucked his own clothes and slid into the bed next to Nick. At least he would get a good night's sleep. *** "Urgh." Nick said as he woke the next morning with a hangover, his mouth tasted as if someone had stuffed it with cotton wool and he wondered if he would have to worry about that. He was surprised that he was not alone in his bed, as he opened his eyes the light hurt them, but he managed to make out that it was Ben with him. Nick sighed and went back to sleep. At least he was safe here. When he woke again a little later he was feeling a little better. He was alone in the bed and decided that maybe he should go looking for Ben. He was just waiting to get the energy when he felt the bed dip under someone's weight. "So, sleeping beauty awakes." Ben said with a small laugh. "Urgh." Nick grumbled. "Yep, that was pretty much what you said this morning." Ben said, and he seemed far too chipper for the morning after the night before. "here, drink this." Nick took the glass dubiously, wondering what weird and wonderful hang over cure he was being given. It didn't taste too bad and opening his eyes he saw that it was mostly orange juice. "It's just a little juice with a few extras. It'll help replace what you lost last night." Ben said. "Do we have to get up?" Nick asked, he sent up a silent prayer that the answer was no, he didn't think that he could deal with anything else right now. "Nup." Ben replied as he took the glass from Nick, placed it on the night table on his own side of the bed and then slid down the covers. "In fact, I was just coming back to bed. I thought that we could have a lay in this morning." Nick smiled and snuggled back in. That sounded like the best thing that they could do. Soon the pair were asleep. When Nick woke for a third time he felt eyes on him. He was pretty sure that he was sober now and that this was not an attack of paranioa that came from drinking too much. He opened his eyes and realised that the eyes were Ben's. "What?" Nick asked self conciously. "Nothing." Ben replied sweetly. "I was just watching you sleep." Ben leaned in for a kiss, and Nick reciprocated. He wasn't sure what was going on, he and Ben were pretty chaste now given their pasts but they were taking things slowly and he respected that. As Ben deepened the kiss, part of Nick wondered whether they were doing the right thing while the other part of him began to get excited that it was going to get some. "You know that you said that the next time that we had sex, it would be making love?" Ben asked softly as he continued to kiss Nick's mouth. "Hmm?" Nick hummed the question between kisses. "And I told you that I didn't think I knew how." Ben said. "Well, I think I see the difference now. I want you Nicky, but not just as a friend or a fuck buddy. I want us to make love." Nick felt his heart sing, his whole body tingle and as if all of his songs had gone to number one. It was the best feeling in the world and he knew that Ben was feeling it too. "Kiss me again." Nick said. Ben did, there was no resignation in the kiss, and no burning fire, it was just a soft, sweet kiss. Nick knew that Ben was ready and that they were going to make love. The kissing continued, first just languid kisses of newly found love, but slowly they began to build into something more. Hands began to roam and Nick knew that this was gettting out of control, but as much as he wanted to stop this he also wanted Ben to do what he wanted, and if that meant going all the way then that was what they would do. After all, they were taking this slowly for Ben's sake, if Ben wanted to speed things up then who was he to argue. "I want you." Ben panted as he became overcome with the passion of the moment, he had Nick in his bed and he was going to get fucked...no...made love to by him. He had never made love before, not really. "I want to know what it's like to make love." "You mean..." Nick looked at him in awe, he had not expected this and wondered if it accounted for the fear in Ben's eyes now as he loomed over him. Ben Maloney was in this way just like a blushing virgin on his wedding night, and that was one thing that he had always assumed Ben would never be. With one final kiss Nick decided that it was just cruel to stretch this moment out any longer. Ben knew what it was that he wanted and Nick would not deny him that any longer. He shucked the few clothes that he was wearing and helped Ben do the same. "Are you sure?" Nick asked once more. Just to make sure that this was positive. "We don't have to..." "I know." Ben said with a small smile playing on his lips. "But I want to." There were a few short moments where Nick wondered if he was doing the right thing, but they had been through too much for them to worry about that. Ben wondered for a moment if he was doing the right thing, Nick had been worried about them being together, but he knew that it was not just about sex and he wanted to have Nick. He wanted this more than he ever had in his life. "It's usually easier on your front." Nick said gently, Ben rolled half way over before he stopped. "No, I...I want to see you." Ben said, rolling onto his back instead. "Isn't that how you do it when you make love?" Nick smiled and nodded, reaching over to the bedside table for condoms and lube. In a perfect world he wouldn't need the rubber but this was not a perfect one. Ben stopped him and threw the condom aside. "I thought that when you made love..." Ben stopped when Nick shook his head slowly and took another square packet from the side. Ben supposed that he was right. They didn't know for certain yet that they were clean, or that they would last, even if Ben felt it deeply in his soul. And he would never be able to teach the kids properly about safe sex if he wasn't practising it himself. Instead of putting them straight on and fucking him which is what Ben would do with a fuck Nick began to caress him everywhere. Taking the opportunity to learn about his lover's body, where he liked to be touched and what made him hot. Slowly he worked his way down Ben's body until he got to his cock. "Lift up." Nick said softly, Ben pulled his legs up and Nick stroked a finger down his perineum towards the puckered opening. He popped the cap on the lubricant and put a little on his fingers, preparing the way with them before he went in. The tight ring of muscle felt snug around the two fingers he had inside but as Ben got used to him he relaxed and the muscles were less tense. Slicking up a third finger Nick put in three this time and fucked them in and out, this time finding the nub inside and bringing groans from Ben as he brushed against his prostate. Ben was in heaven, he kept his eyes firmly on Nick and saw the love in the eyes as he was finger fucked by his lover. Nick pulled his fingers out to prepare himself as Ben lay on the bed apparently lost in the passion of the moment, his cock was hard and dripping precum and he knew that he was not much better, slipping on the condom he positioned himself at the opening and then reached up to take Ben's hand. He gave it a gentle squeeze and then placed a kiss on the palm. "I'm starting now." He said as he began to push, not sure why he had spoken the words but wanting to say them anyway. Once he was fully in he leaned down and kissed Ben, whose legs were tight to him, his head propped on pillows. Nick reached his hand down and stroked Ben, his other hand on Ben's hip to guide him in his strokes on and out. They were moving now, Ben wanting to push himself onto the cock in him so that he could have more exposure to it and Nick moving in and out and timing his stroking of Ben's cock with his movement. An entire conversation was carried between them as they made love although neither spoke a word. Messages of love and lust shared in looks and touches. As Ben neared climax he panted out the words that Nick had longed to hear so much before he had heard them just a few weeks before. "I love you Nick." Ben said, then came as he felt the large cock in him touch his prostate. Nick kept moving, wishing that the stories of synchronised orgasms were easy and true. A few moments later he felt the tightening of his balls and then he came, shooting his cum into the condom that surrounded him. He waited a few minutes, just enjoying the feeling of being enclosed in the warmth of his friend before his dick slipped out. Getting rid of the condom he then snuggled down with Ben who lay in a boneless sprawl enjoying his post orgasmic state. Nick contemplated getting a towel to clean his friend but instead leaned down and licked him clean, eliciting a moan from the otherwise lifeless Ben as he touched the still sensitive cock. Once the job was done he cuddled up to his friend and held him as he slept. Nick held Ben and knew that they were well on their way to being in love. They had made love just as he had told Ben that they would and he was pretty sure that when they woke the next morning the world would not fall off its axis and nothing would change. They had just found a new way to express the love that they shared between them. There were three more days of his stay in New York and he knew that he would enjoy every one of them. *** The End Notes: I'm still not sure what direction this is taking, but I wanted to tie up this one loose end at least. Once I know where I am going with this I would like to write more Alex and Sully. Stay tuned.