J o n a t h a n   A n d r e w   Y b a n e z


A U T H O R ' S B A B B L I N G

Okay, I know there are a lot of BACKSTREET BOYS story out there and most of them are centered on people having crushes either with BRIAN LITTREL, NICK CARTER or KEVIN RICHARDSON. I try to make this a little bit different from the usual with the celebrities themselves falling for the fictional character.

I admit that I am not a BACKSTREET BOYS fan although some of their songs really caught my attention. But I am, indeed, a very big fan of BRIAN LITTREL and KEVIN RICHARDSON, but since it was BRIAN LITTREL who had a heart problem, I think it was best to center this story around him. No, I don't think that he is gay, but it would certainly be interesting if he is.

D I S C L A I M E R :

I would like to remind you that this is just a part of the imagination of the author and none of these events ever happen. Any similarity between events in the story and situations in somebody else's life is purely and absolutely coincidental, accidental or, just simply, impossible. This story doesn't state anything about BRIAN LITTREL'S sexuality or choice of lifestyle, implicitly or explicitly. Remember this is just a composition based totally on the imagination of the author.

This story contains a homosexual premise and has homosexual undertones. If you are a minor, you know the rules. Please don't read this and find something more suitable for you age. But if you reach the age of majority, you can come back. If you're a bigot who just wandered here by mistake, you are allowed to stay. I would like to request you, however, to please keep an open mind.

Please enjoy!!!

Jonathan Andrew Ybanez

T E N   T H I N G S

	See a rainbow at dawn
X	Taste the first snowflake of winter
X	Go to Disney World
	Flash someone from a car
X	See the dawn
	Be a star
X	Touch a snake
X	Make someone smile
	Talk to God
	Kiss my soul mate


C h a p t e r 4

"It was in a beach. Very much like this one, except it was during the sunset." I narrated my dream to Nick, as we sat on the hood of my car. "I was a little kid named Jerald Mitchell, building a sand castle along North Shore of Prince Edward Island. I was supposed to be from Florida."

I continued to stare at the horizon. The night sky was scattered with stars. It still has the full moon from last night, hanging like a lone large Christmas ornament with a bunch of Christmas lights backing it up. I looked at Nick and continued telling him my story. "Then, this young boy with a nasty scar on his forehead came to me, introduced himself to me as Tevyn,... Tevyn Winters, from Toronto. Well, he wanted to race with me to a lighthouse, but I told him I can't, that I have a heart condition. He told me that it was okay because he has leukemia. We played along the surf and walked towards a lighthouse, like average, everyday kid's stuff."

I stopped and rubbed my temples. My head started to ache like crazy. "At the lighthouse, something mystical happened. He started to ask me about destiny, soul mates and those other stuff. He was saying something like 'I believe that everything has its place and time because the fates wish to keep everything in order. I believe that there are people and things in this world, which are meant to cross paths because if they don't, their existence would prove to be meaningless and futile.' He then asked me if we were soul mates."

I paused again, swallowing hard, then, I continued. "What was really weird was that he called me Brian."

"Isn't that your name?" Nick looked at me quizzically.

"Yes, it's my name, of course, but..." I groaned at Nick's innocent but dense remark. "But in the dream, my name was supposed to be Jerald Mitchell."

"Who?" Nick asked. His face was just a blank.

"Jerald Mitchell. I was supposed to be him in my dream. Remember?" I moaned in frustration. "I told you about being Jerald Mitchell, who ever that guy is."

"Oh, yeah right?" He gave me a look of comprehension.

"It's just so frustrating. I don't have a clue on what my dream means."

"So, it's just a dream!" Nick told me in a 'matter-of-factly' way. "Nothing more! You know, dreams are never ever logical. They're supposed to be that way. Dreams are just weird in more ways than one."

"It's not just the dream that's becoming strange. Remember earlier, this morning." I sighed. Realizing the time, I took a quick glance at my watch and corrected my statement. "I mean yesterday morning, after the video shoot. Well, after you left, I got around the hospital.

I paused to think of the best possible choice of words. "And there in the hospital was a guy named Tevyn Winters. He was confined for leukemia. He looked like same guy in my dream. He had the same eyes, the same hair color, same face... same everything. I mean even the scar was there, running across his forehead and gashing through his eyebrow. He was in every way the little boy in my dream only he was the older version of that kid. How weird could it get? He even has the same dream as I did, since he was eleven. 

"And surprise, surprise..." I said in exasperation and exhaustion. "He came from Toronto. What's even more bizarre, he knows that I am engaged to Leighanne. I mean I hadn't even announce that anyone"

Nick just stared at me, blankly.

"You don't believe me, do you." I looked at him, sighed and bowed down my head in fatigue.

What the hell was I doing, of course, he couldn't understand me, much less believe me." I thought as I came to a conclusion. "He's just a little kid. He's just waaaay too naïve and too innocent to understand all this."

I looked at him again and saw the blank expression on his face. I decided that Nick had too much reality for the night and it was best that we go home. I got off the hood of my car. "I don't expect you understand anyway. Come on, I'll take you home."

"No, I believe, you." I looked at me with a glitter of wisdom in his eyes. "I know it's hard to believe but I think he's your soul mate?"

"You think I am gay?" I looked at him with a very troubled expression on my face.

"No." He said with a very focused expression on his face. "No, absolutely, not."

"So what are you trying to say."

"Remember, what he said about a reason for everything, why people meet and cross path."

"Because if they don't, their existence would just prove to be meaningless and futile." Now, I was the one who is confused. "Yeah, so? Meaning?"

"Well, he has leukemia." Nick said brightly. "Maybe you are the key to his health. I mean you could become a bone marrow donor. If you two are compatible, that is."

"Do you really think so?" I asked. "Hey, do you really think so?"

"Of course! And besides, soul mates really need not have sex, do they?" He laughed hysterical.

"Well,..." Sensing that I failed to get his joke, he became serious and asked. "Well, DO they?"

"Of course not." I hurriedly replied. "I mean soul mates are someone who understand you best, I think..."

I remained silent for a while and thought about what Nick had said. "So do you really think, I could help his condition right now." I looked at Nick's face for support. "I mean this guy is supposed to be in the fourth stage already, and that's only one stage left before it's a terminal case. That's almost good as dead!"

"Brian, this must be the reason why you have these dreams." He declared firmly. "I mean what else would the argument be for having the same recurring dreams every night."

I thought carefully on what Nick said. "It's true, I mean soul mates need not have sex. And that means I am not gay." Sighing deeply with relief, I told nick. "Tomorrow, I will have a talk with his doctor."

Then messed and tossed up his blonde locks. "I see you do have some functioning brain cells under that blonde hair of yours."

"Hey, looks who's talking." He said as grabbed my ear then pulled it down. "You're a bigger and dumber blond than I will ever be!!!"

"HEY THAT'S PAINFUL!!!" I screamed in anguish. "AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!."

Playfully, we punched each other and ran around the beachfront. Laughing and chasing each other, we acted like little kids, and played in the dunes. After some horsing around, I decided that it was already getting early in the morning so I told Nick. "I think you'd better go home now, you still have your flight in the morning. And your mother must be worried sick by now."

"I guess so." Nick wiped the sweat off his face and smiled a toothy grin at me. "I had fun, you know. Let's do this again sometime."

"Only the next time I get the thought that I might be gay." I joked.

"So, do you still want your Voodoo doll?"

"Well, I still have to play trick on Kevin, remember?" We laughed as we made our way to the car.

We got into the car and drove away. Nick must have gotten so tired because, along the road, he was already sleeping soundly. I had to laugh, this guy is still a boy, no matter how mature he tries to act or think. When we reached his house, he was still snoring. I hate to wake him up but... "Nick, wake up, you're home."

"Huh?... But mom, I'm still sleepy!..." he whined groggily. "And besides I don't have anything to do today... It's a Saturday…" He ended his sentence with a long yawn.

"Hey! You little bastard!!! Wake up!!! I SAID WAKE UP!!!"" I laughed as I shook him up. "You're already home. Get off my car, you freeloader."

"Oh?..." He finally stirred and began to get the car. Babbling incoherently, he said. "Bye, Kevin, nice to see again, hope we can dance in the fountain again in the future..."

"IT'S BRIAN, YOU BLATHERING IDIOT!!!" I shouted, giggling uncontrollably. "And thanks for everything!"

"Anything you say, Howie..." He said as he left the car and sleepily trudge his way to the front door, walking like a drunkard. "Tell, A.J. I'd loved him better if he had more hair on his head..."

"Good kid." I thought as I drove off, then, giggled hysterically as I thought further. "A little bit too much air in the forehead, but a good kid, nevertheless."


@);-,'-----		@);-,'-----		@);-,'-----


Early morning the very next day, I drove off to the hospital and went directly to the information center. "Excuse me." I called on the receptionist behind the counter. "To whom do I talk to on a bone marrow transplant?"

"Sir, a bone marrow transplant? For a moment, sir… Cardiology, cosmology, dermatology, dentistry,..." She said then scanned her computer screen. After she finished searching at her monitor. "Here we are!!! Hematology... You should see Dr. Edward Murray, he's the head of the hematology department. His office is room 156. Please just follow the red line on the floor. His office is just located along that line"

"Thanks." I said with a smile.

"Thank you, sir." She said as she smiled back.

Following the red line, I was able to located Dr. Murray's office, located around 200 meters from the information counter. I knocked the door and then entered. His secretary looked up and motioned me to come near her. "Good morning, sir, what can I do for you?"

"Good morning." I greeted her back. "I wished to see Dr. Murray about a bone marrow transplant. The lady in information told me he is the man to see."

"Sir, do you have an appointment with the doctor."

"Actually no, this just came as a spur of the moment." I answered.

"I'm sorry but you should have had made an appointment earlier." Frowning, she said. "I'm sorry but I can not allow you to see him, he has a lot of things to do and patients to see."

"But,..." I protested. "This may be a matter of life and death."

"I'm sorry but he is busy." She scowled as looked down at her notebook. She glanced back at me, looked a little bit more closely at me and said. "You know, you look a little bit like a member of that singing boy group, Backstreet Boys."

"I do?" My heart skipped a beat.

"You kind of look like that Lance Bass."

"Actually, Lance Bass is part of N'sync, an entirely different boyband from the Backstreet Boys." Relieved that she failed to recognize me, I thought of what I would answer. I decided not to give myself away. "Actually, people say I look a lot like Brian Littrel. I don't know if that is an asset or liability." I laughed and continued. "So when can I have appointment with the good doctor." 

"Well, Mr. 'Littrel' let me see my notebook first." She said as she glanced back her journal. "Well, I can book you for next week Monday, that's the closest one I can give you."

"That's the closest one you can give me?" My voice betrayed my dismay. "Isn't there a space you can write me in there? Monday!!! But the patient might die by then"

She said firmly. "Sorry, sir but..."

Suddenly the phone rang. "Excuse me for a minute." She told me. "Good morning, Dr. Murray's office, how may I help you?... Good morning, Mr. Erickson,... you have to reschedule your appointment with Dr. Murray?... of course that's no problem, sir... okay, I'll jot you down for Tuesday next week, good bye sir."

She turned to me and said. "You're in luck, the doctor's ten o'clock just canceled."

"Thank you, you don't know how much you had helped me."

"Who should I say is seeing the doctor today?"

"Brian Littrel." I said nonchalantly.

"Stop joking, young man." She narrowed her eyes. "I don't have time for any foolishness. I need your name."

"I am Brian Littrel." I said as I reached for my driver's license in my back pocket. I showed it to her. "See?"

"So it is!" She groaned and laughed, in spite of herself. "Then why the hell didn't you tell me that."

"Well, I just don't want to be recognized that's all." I laughed with her. "No special treatment that's all."

"Oh, just take a seat there." She laughed her head off as she wrote my name in the doctor's appointment schedule.

I walked over the to bench and read some magazines and medical journals. About ten minutes later, my name was called and I entered the doctor's private chambers.

"Good morning, Mr. Littrel,..." He said, looking at a piece of paper on his desk. He motioned me to sit down on a chair in front of his table, not lifting his face from the table. "Did you know that you have the exact name of a member of the Backstreet Boys."

"Actually, I AM Brian Littrel of THE Backstreet Boys." I replied.

He lifted his head, took one good look at me. He muttered with great surprise. "Well, jumping mother of pearl..."

I had to laugh at the reaction of his face. "Please, doctor, don't look too surprise. Actually, I am here to talk too you about donating bone marrow."

"You are?"

"Yes, there is one person,... A friend of mine. He's confined at this hospital right now." I explained. "His name is Tevyn Winters."

"Oh, Mr. Winters,..." His face suddenly fell into pieces.

"Why doctor?" I studied his face. "Is anything wrong."

"Don't you know that he was given only about a month to live, at most he can go for about three months, and if he can go beyond the given time, well, that's nothing short of a miracle." He looked at me sadly. "You can donate your bone marrow but I don't think it would make a big difference."

"For Tevyn,..." I said then paused for a while. "...and for me, it will make a big difference. More difference than anything,... more than all the things,... that you can imagine."

"Even if you would donate your bone marrow." He took off his glasses and rubbed the crease on his forehead with his right hand. "The chances of having the compatible samples are very rare, even in blood relatives. You could just be wasting all your effort, time and even could be in great pain for doing such procedure. You know..."

"I don't care, Doctor." I interrupted him, pounding my fist intensely on his heavy and hard wooden desk to emphasize my point. "Think of this, I could be the key to his well-being. I mean Tevyn is already in a life and death situation, don't you think an effort to help him, no matter how small, how futile or how impossible, could be the only difference in curing him? Or just at least, to extend his life long enough to wait for a real cure?"

I stood up straight and inhaled deeply. I looked at Doctor Murray curiously. "And Doctor, why the FUCK are you always trying to contradict me?!!! I don't understand why but it is as if you are trying your best to discourage me to take the test."

"Aren't you supposed to helping people, Dr. Murray?" Blinking, I told in bewilderment. "And I am getting confused over this so could you please help me? Could enlighten me on this because I am running out of reasons to convince you?"

"Actually, Mr. Littrel, whether you believe me or not, I was just checking." He enigmatically smiled at me with a strange look in his face.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused at his enigmatic statement.

"Well, how sure was I that you are really sincere to do this procedure." He continued. "You see, to me this could just well be a promotional thing, some sort of free advertisement for your band. So I have to test you,... to know that you are really sincere. And I guess you are sincere enough.

"You mean you will help me?" I looked at him brightly.

"I will more than help you, Mr. Littrel." I extended his hands to me. "You are certainly a good man."

"Thank you, Doctor Murray." I shook his hand firmly. "You don't know how much you have helped me."

"No, thank you, Mr. Brian Littrel." He smiled approvingly. "You don't know how much you have helped us, especially Tevyn Winters, for this act of kindness."


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