IM BACK!!! Did you all miss me? It is now official that life has calmed down and my attentions can turn back to what I love doing. I want to thank all of you for your patience and want to let each of you know that I am back full force and going to devote a lot of my time to Cody and the Gang. We need to get the ball rolling on this thing and make it interesting. I apologize for the time I took away from the story. Life needed to be straightened out - even though it's not completely wrinkle-free, it's at a point that I can finally relax and devote it to me. With that said...LET'S GET GOING!
I didn't hear from many people after my last posting. I don't like that very much and would love to hear from my readers. But I'm not going to panic, though, because I know a lot of you read but don't respond. I thank you all for reading and I hope you continue to do so and I doubly thank those of you who did respond. Every email makes me smile.
My biggest fear I have is that the readers have disappeared. HELLO!!! If you're still out there and still reading, let me know. I always welcome your comments and words of wisdom. Hearing from you makes my day and brings a smile to my face. Feel free to write me at Shywriterboy29@ hotmail.com
I don't have the slightest clue as to the sexual orientation of the characters in this story. It is entirely a figment of my imagination
(but I can dream!), and is not intended to reflect on any celebrities used in this story. For those of you that are NOT of legal age,
go do something else. If you do read this, then don't get caught. If you are offended by male/male material, or it is illegal to view
such materials in your area, you should be typing in a new URL at this time. (Why are you even at this website?) If you are looking
for a story with lots of sex, boy, are you in the wrong place! This is a story of love and friendship. Sure there will be sex, but it
will not be a free-for-all every story.
|EARLIER THAT DAY|
We continued to walk, with Cameron on the other side of Lance. Lance turned to Cameron and asked, "Cameron, I need to ask you something."
"What is it, Lance?" Cameron replied.
"After you guys left I went into the dressing room and found Justin sitting in there alone. He was in some sort of trance and acting very funny. I tried to talk to him and seemed in some other land. What happened between the two of you?" Lance asked.
"Oh, that," Cameron said as the flush started to appear in his cheeks. Cameron told Lance the story of him and Justin and the kiss. When Cameron finished, Lance just stood there with a dumbfounded look on his face. Cameron started to worry. "Um, Lance. I'm sorry if I've caused any unnecessary drama for the group. It just felt right and I went with it. I apologize."
Lance began to smile. "There is no need to apologize, and if I didn't have the sexiest man on the planet already, I would kiss you myself."
OK WAIT A MINUTE I thought to myself HOLD THE PHONE. Did he just use the words `have' and `sexiest man on the planet'? It was at that moment that I realized just how deep my feelings for Lance Bass went. How on earth did I come across someone so wonderful? I began feeling myself fall hard for him. But was I ready?
"What do you mean, Lance?" Cameron replied, bringing me out of my own thoughts.
"That makes perfect sense now. He was acting like I felt when I first kissed you, Cody," he said turning to look at me. Oh, those eyes!!
"I was on cloud nine and felt like I had been transported to a magical new place the first time I kissed you, my dear," Lance continued, still looking at me. He turned his attention back to Cameron "I'm not sure, but I don't think that Justin has ever felt anything like that before. I don't think he knows how to react. He did say that you left in a hurry though. He was worried he did something wrong."
"Yeah, I did leave rather abruptly," Cameron said looking down. "When he didn't say anything or react I panicked and had to get out of there. I heard him call after me but I couldn't stop."
"Well then, why are you still standing here?" Lance said quickly "I think you need to go find Justin and talk to him. Just talk from your heart and let him know how you feel. He needs to know that you like him and that it was nothing he did that made you panic. You just may get another kiss out of it."
Cameron's face lit right up when he heard what Lance said. "If you two will excuse me, I have a man to go fetch."
"Go get `em, tiger," Lance said with a laugh as Cameron took off towards the arena.
"Cameron!" I yelled running after him.
"Yes, Cody?" he said stopping.
I caught up to where he was. "Good luck," I said kissing him on the cheek. "I love you, ass-face."
"I love you two, dumb-ass," Cameron said smiling and took off again towards the arena.
I stood there smiling at my best friend as I felt Lance's arms one more time, from behind me, snake around my waist. I turned around to face him as I held him close.
"Now it's my turn to say," I said looking into his eyes. "That was very nice of you to do, Lance."
"I'm just doing my job," he replied.
Our lips met one more time in a deep, passionate kiss. You know that place that Lance was talking about? The place he was transported when we first kissed? Damn that place is beautiful!!
How could I just clam up like that? I thought to myself as I paced a trench in the dressing room floor. The one thing that I had been longing to happen had happened and I just froze. I didn't know what to do. When Cameron kissed me it was like the world stopped spinning and its sole inhabitants were me and him. My heart started to race, my knees began to buckle, and, when I needed it most, my voice stopped working. I could see that my silence was affecting Cameron and not in a good way, but there was nothing I could do. I JUST COULDN'T SPEAK! It wasn't until he left that my voice returned. I tried calling out his name but it was too late, he was gone.
I sat down and tried to think of what to do next but it was impossible. I was still spinning. It was only a simple kiss but it left me feeling things that I never thought imaginable. Don't get me wrong, I'd been kissed before by friends, past girlfriends, the occasional hookup and they were all good, but NONE of their lips had such an affect on me as Cameron's had. I couldn't stay in that room any longer, so I decided to take a walk and gather my thoughts. As I began to leave, Lance and Josh came back into the dressing room.
"Well, Curly, Brayden has been loaded and they are on their way to the hospital," Lance said looking at me from the other side of the room.
"That's good," I half mumbled, not at all paying attention.
"You OK, Justin?" Josh asked, making his way towards me.
"Mmm hmm," I replied again, still in La La Land.
"Nice try, Justin," Lance said, following Josh in my direction. "Something's wrong. Spill it."
"It's...It's...Cameron," I began to stutter. "He just..."
"He just what, Justin?" Josh asked quizzically.
"He...just...I...tried...he left... too fast...I called after...I fucked up..." I tried to finish but I just couldn't do it. I stood up and nearly bolted for the door.
"Wait, Curly. Where're you going?" Lance nearly yelled.
"I'm uh...going to uh...going to walk...uh ...clear...head...before...show," I replied, nearly running away from them.
I walked out the door, headed towards the empty arena. I figured I'd sit and watch the crew assemble the staging and just think. Think about what just happened and what I'm going to do about it.
I felt like a complete idiot. I couldn't believe that one little kiss could make me so damned loopy. I found my way into the arena and climbed up the bleachers at the back to the top row. As I sat there, I thought to myself Damn these are shitty seats. You can barely see the stage from here. But that didn't matter. Right now, I didn't want to be seen, I just wanted to be alone. I had to figure this out. I had to recalibrate my thoughts, `cause right now I don't know up from down.
All sorts of thoughts kept running through my head. Did Cameron really just kiss me? Was there a reason he did it? Were there feelings behind it, or was it merely to shut me up? I couldn't answer any of those questions, I just didn't know. The one thing I did know was that I wanted it to happen again
I ran back into the arena and bee lined it to the dressing room. I nearly tore the door off the frame trying to get in to Justin. When I got in, Justin was nowhere to be seen. The only people in the room were Josh and Brayden, cuddling and talking on the couch. I nearly scared the shit out of them when I barged through the door.
"Jesus, Cameron!" Josh screeched, "You scared the hell out of me."
"Josh, have you seen Justin?" I asked breathlessly.
"Justin?" he asked. "He...uh...wait, what the hell happened between the two of you?"
"Never mind that right now," I replied rather pointedly. "Where is he, I have to find him."
"He's out in the arena somewhere. He said he needed to walk and clear his thoughts before the show," he replied, obviously annoyed at my bluntness.
"Sorry to be so rude, I just have to find him," I replied with a smile. "Thanks for your help."
I ran back out the door and towards the arena. I had no clue where I was going or where to start, I just knew I had to find him.
I found my way to the stage and noticed that the crew had pretty much finished setting up. I stood backstage for what seemed like forever, debating on whether or not to go out there. I needed a good view of the whole arena and I knew that on stage was the best view around. So I bit my tongue and ran up to the front of the stage.
Once I was up there I was astounded at what I saw. It looked like a vast sea of chairs. It was very intimidating empty, so I could not fathom what it would be like filled with screaming fans. I took in that feeling for a minute longer and then got back to business.
The lights of the arena were on so I was able to see pretty far. I started at the front row and began scanning back through the rows of chairs for any signs of life. I got to the back of the auditorium and couldn't see anything. I was just about to start scanning the upper rows when something caught the corner of my eye. I looked back towards the back of the arena and there he was. I had to squint to see him but he was there, slumped down in a chair on the very top row. A huge grin spread across my face as I made my way off the stage and towards where he sat.
As I got closer, I began to see him more clearly. I know he noticed I was coming, but he didn't acknowledge me at all. He just sat there, staring ahead with a painfully blank look on his face. It made my heart break to see him sitting there, in the middle of an empty row, looking like someone just stomped on his heart.
I made my way up the aisle towards the row where he was sitting. He still didn't acknowledge that I was there. I stopped when I reached the head of the row and quietly asked, "Would you like some company?"
He didn't say a word but motioned towards the seat next to him with his hand.
I made my way down the row and sat down next to him. I looked forward just taking in the opposite view that I had had a few minutes ago. I sat there in silence for a few minutes, trying to think of what to say. Finally, I decided to just talk to him outright, to not beat around the bush and just put it all on the line.
I turned to face him. "Justin," I began. "I think..."
"Why did you do it?" he quietly cut me off, still not looking at me.
"What did you say?" I asked him.
"Why did you kiss me?" he repeated, still looking forward. "Why did you do that?"
"Like I said earlier, you looked like you needed it." I said smiling, trying to lighten the mood. But when Justin still did not look at me, still did not respond, I began to second guess what I had done.
"Look, Justin," I continued on, "all my life I have had this reputation of being a big bully. Of being a tough guy who kicks ass first and asks questions later. I admit, in situations that call for that approach, I am like that. If you're some stranger freaking out or going crazy and endangering something or someone I love, I will knock you on your ass to shut you up. However, when it comes to situations that have to do with my own heart, most of the time I become a blubbering idiot inside, end up panicking and just shoot from the hip."
I stopped to take a breath and look at Justin. He still hadn't looked at me, but I could tell he was listening.
"When I saw you freaking out over the situation in the dressing room," I began again, "my heart went out to you. I hated to see someone so beautiful and wonderful hurting that much. It warmed my heart to see you so heartfelt and worried about your friend's boyfriend. I knew I wanted to help you, to let you know that you were alright. I tried talking to you but you weren't listening. So I did the first thing that came to my mind to let you know that someone cares about you and won't let anything happen to you."
I looked over at Justin and he was no longer looking forward. His head was bowed towards his lap and a single tear streaked down his cheek. Immediately I knew that I had just gone too far.
"Justin, don't cry," I said, putting my hand on his back. "I so sorry for what I did. I should have used my head and known that kissing you was completely the wrong thing to do. I should have been more adult and not acted on my instincts. I'm sorry if I made things worse. I wish..."
"Ssssshhhhhh," Justin said, turning towards me and placing his finger on my lips. "Stop talking."
I ceased talking as Justin removed his finger, placing his hands back in his lap. His gaze did not leave mine.
"You think I'm beautiful?" he asked quietly, as another tear streaked down his cheek.
"Yes, Justin, I do." I said with a smile. "I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't."
"Really?" he asked.
"Yes, really." I chuckled. "I didn't do it because your Justin from N'Sync, I did it because you are a beautiful human being that needed some comfort. You're a person just like I am, and if I was in that situation I would want someone to comfort me and tell me I was OK. Granted, a kiss is kind of personal, but it just felt right, so I went for it. It just a damn good bonus that your drop dead gorgeous and if I may say, a hell of a kisser."
I managed to get a smirk out of Justin that time. It was nice to see him smile again.
"I do want to say again, though, that..." I began again, but was quickly cut off by Justin's lips landing squarely on my own. I immediately tensed up and took in a sharp breath of air, but just as fast, began to relax and enjoy what was happening.
After a few seconds, he broke the kiss and grinned at me.
"What was that for?" I asked him breathlessly. "Did you think I needed that?"
"No," he answered simply. "I just wanted to."
We sat there looking at each other for a few minutes longer, but it felt like an eternity. It was the first time I noticed how truly beautiful Justin Timberlake was. I had spent my life trying to overcome my stupid reputation and find someone that would truly love me for me, someone that I could love as well. And now, here I was, staring into the eyes of the most beautiful person I had ever met, and feeling things that I had never felt before. If this was heaven, sign me up!
"Hey, Justin, "I started to say but was cut off again.
"Cameron, shut up." Justin said with a laugh. "It's my turn to talk."
I made a motion over my lips to zip them shut and just nodded. Justin giggled and reached over and took my hand.
"First thing I want to say is, you have nothing to apologize for. I was in no way mad or upset that you kissed me. You just caught me completely off guard. Now don't get me wrong, I've been kissed before, but none of them gave me the reaction that I had when you did it," he paused, continuing to look at me. "Your kiss felt so real, the most real thing I've ever felt in my life. I felt how much you cared, I felt that you honestly felt something for me, that you wanted to be there and that you wanted to do it. Kissing fans and other people like that has always felt rehearsed, planned and half assed. Your kiss, though, was from the heart and the only way I can describe it was that it made me feel human."
I just sat there blank faced. I did not know what to say. He was OK with what I did. My heart wanted to leap out of my chest.
"Cameron, I like you," Justin continued. "I really like you. I don't want to presume how you feel but I would like the chance to get to know you better, to personally see the wonderful guy that Cody keeps telling us about. I feel safe when I'm with you, I'm happy just looking in your eyes and I'm on top of the world just thinking about you. When you look at me, I know that you're seeing the real Justin Timberlake, and not just the pop star. I want all the feelings and the looks to continue, and I want to see if we can make something grow and flourish between us. Would you be up for taking it one day at a time and see what could happen?"
OK, now it was me that was crying. I could not believe what I was hearing. I came back to the arena with the mindset that he was completely mad at me and I'd totally screwed up. Now, Justin wanted to be with me, to see what could happen between the two of us. I knew at that moment there was nothing on the planet that would make me happier than to be with Justin.
"Justin," I replied squeezing his hands. "I would love to."
Justin's face broke out into a huge grin, as he reached up and wiped my tears from my eyes.
"Umm, Justin?" I ask sheepishly.
"Yes, Cameron?" he replied.
"Can I kiss you?" I ask as the blush started rising in my cheeks.
"I thought you'd never ask," he replied as he leaned in and gave me a kiss that I will never forget.
I cannot believe the nerve of those people! I thought to myself as I walked out of the green room. How could they bring complete strangers into our lives without even considering the others in the group? I thought Lance was smarter than that.
That was the least of my worries though. How the hell did Josh find out about Brayden? He only hung out with us a couple of times before I had to set him straight, so he couldn't have gotten that close to any of them. Josh got what he deserved though. That will teach him to get into my business. If he doesn't learn to leave well enough alone, I'll have to put him in his place just like I did Brayden.
It sucks though that I had to set Brayden straight, but it had to be done. It didn't matter anymore that he used to be my best friend and the one person in my family that I was closest to. He was a fag and that isn't morally or physically right. All I hear now days is gay this and gay that. They want to be treated like normal people, but how can they when they are nothing but freaks of nature and all destined to burn in hell. I couldn't stand to have my best friend a Fag. I don't want any of that shit rubbing off on me. So he got put right where he belongs, in a broken heap at my feet.
I began to wander about the arena. It didn't matter how much I disliked my band mates, I knew we all had a job to do tonight. We still had to look like a cohesive unit on stage, no matter what was going on behind the scenes. I decided to climb the stairs into the highest level of seats in the arena. It was barren up there and I knew that I could sit up there and not be disturbed until I had to come back down for the show. It was still awhile off, so hopefully by then I'll be in a better mood and not want to strangle them all.
I found a nice spot at the back of the arena, way above everything else. These were the really cheap seats and I could tell why. The stage looked like a postage stamp in the middle of a blank piece of paper.
I was looking around the arena when something below me caught my eye. There were two people sitting...wait a minute...that's Justin and that new guy...I think his name is Cameron. They look like they are in a serious conversation. I wish I could hear what they're saying. That Cameron guy is a prick and will get his if he doesn't stay in line.
WHOA...Holy Shit...Did Cameron just kiss Justin? Is Cameron a fag too? Wait...that would mean that...OH MY GOD...JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE IS A FAG.
I silently smiled and laughed to myself. I'm gonna have fun with this!
|**To Be Continued**|