Date: Sun, 15 Oct 2000 14:27:50 EDT From: Hypnos31@aol.com Subject: Warmest eyes chapter 7 gay/Celb/boyband/ Hey All!!! Thank you for reading this chapter of the Warmest eyes. I know my story is not that action packed and basicaly has no sex in it. Soon though some major progress will be made in the start of a realtionship but with who? hmmmm I appreciate those who have stuck with it and those who are new readers. As always I'm Scotty and you can reach me at Hypnos31@aol.com. Please tell me what you think..do you like it, hate it or wahtever. : ) Disclaimer: This story contains subject manner a bout male to male realtionships. If you don't like it then you are most likely close minded but we are allowed to our own opinions even if they are wrong. thats called tolerence. Just Kidding. But seriously if ya don't like it please stop reading.This story again is a work of Fiction. (thats mean not real...hehehe) So if you Nsync guys are reading this and not liking it Please write me and we'll straighten it out. : ) Last but not least. The Thank yous! Kyle~ for being there from the beginning Jay~ Being simply wonderful... Collen~ For being my muse and inspiration Kelly~ for being a friend who can hold a conversation Casey and Kitty~thanks for the support! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After the trip with guys let me off home where I got out my dance stuff and quickly prepared for a Modern class I was taking. I got to the studio and slipped off my shoes. I started stretching on the floor as I waited for the other in the class to get there. I was fairly early as usual. Thought went spinning through my head about my day and the show. My modern teacher kept telling me to relax but I couldn't until we did our dance for Love Ridden by Fiona Apple, which is so sad. Love Ridden, I've looked at you With the focus I gave to my birthday candles I wished on the lidded blue flames Under your brow And baby, I wished for you Nobody see when you are lying in your bed And I wanna crawl in with you But I cry instead I want your warm, but it will only make Me colder when it's over So I can't tonight, baby No, not "baby" anymore-if I need you I'll just use your simple name Only kisses on the cheek from now on And in a little while, We'll only have to wave My hand won't hold you down no more The path is clear to follow through I stood too long in the way of the door And now I'm giving up on you No, not "baby" anymore- if I need you I'll just use your simple name Only kisses on the cheek for now on And in a little while, we'll only have to wave. No, not "baby" anymore- if I need you I'll just use your simple name Only kisses on the cheek for now on And in a little while, we'll only have to wave. Just as we finished those entering for next class clapped and showed their approval I smiled. I turned to get my bag and I saw Joe standing with smile and a baseball cap. He moved his way over to me. "Very nice Scott" I felt very embarrassed "Thanks...I'm not all that good" "You looked great to me." "Thanks Joe" He smiled "Who was that singing?" "Fiona Apple" "That song is so sad." "It is...but I guess that's the way love goes" "Not all the time" he said defensively "You're absolutely right. Not all the time." I said with a smile "Scott, Can I talk to you?" "Sure." "No, in private." "Okay Joe..." "How about we go to my hotel? We should be left alone" "Is it that serious?" I asked "Well kind of..." he said as we walked to the door. We got into the car and rode to the motel. There was an uneasy silence in the car. It was the first time since I first met Joe that felt uncomfortable around him. We got to the hotel and we went through the back exit. We rode the elevator to the seventh floor, which was reserved totally for them. As we got onto the floor we walked quite a ways down to his room. He swiped his room key card and we walked in. He flipped on the lights. "Make yourself at home I'm going to use the bathroom." Joe said "Okay, have fun!" "What?" "Have fun. That's what I always say to people when they tell me they are going to the bathroom." I explained and Joe laughed "Scotty, you're an odd guy sometimes." Then Joey exited the room. I sat myself down on the well-made bed next to a messed up one. I took off my coat and examined my situation. I looked around the room to help me make sense of why Joe wanted to talk to me in private. By the physical looks of the room I couldn't make out anything except that a messy person and a very tidy person lived in this room. Joe soon came walking out of the bathroom. I looked at him with confusion painted all over my face. He smiled. I guessed he was trying to ease my discomfort. It didn't help much but I think I might go through all the discomfort again so I could see that smile another time. "Well, I heard you, J.C and Justin went out yesterday." He said "We went to the art museum. There was an Impressionist exhibit." "Did you have a good time?" He seemed to be probing for information. "Yes. I had great time. It was nice getting to know J.C and Justin better." "Are you sure, you had a good time?" He arched his eyebrow at me. "I'm quite positive actually." I felt like I was getting interrogated. "Is there some sort of information you would like to know Joe? I don't want to be guessing about what you want to hear." I said plainly. Joe seemed a bit taken back as if he expected to ask me the questions and then I'd spew out all my stories at him. Then he spoke. "I heard about your and Justin's 'conversation'. " he said with a certain amount of concern. "Oh." "What did he say?" "Nothing really." I lied "Scott, come on..." Joey said "He didn't say much..." "Scott..." Joey prodded "Please tell me! I need to know." "It's not important, Joe. It's over. We're fine." I shifted uncomfortably where I was sitting. "It may be over with you but not with me." He stated "Joe, This really doesn't involve you." I said gently "Yes it does Scott. It involves me because it concerns J.C, Justin and you. You are all my friends and I care if my friends don't get along with one another. I overheard a conversation that J.C and Justin were having. J.C was pretty upset at Justin for what he had said earlier today. What happened? Please Scott..." His eyes pleaded with me. I gave in, I know I couldn't fight it forever. "Justin wasn't in a very good mood and he said...well basically...I guess it boils down to this.." I was trying to think of a nicer way of saying it but I couldn't think of one. "Yes..." Joe said impatiently. "He said that I was using you so I could help out my career." I saw in Joe's eyes that he was almost ready to explode. "I'm sure he didn't mean it to be so cutting and it was mostly my fault, I was very sarcastic and I instigated it." I tried to calm Joe down. "I'm sure he knew exactly what he was saying. Scott it's not your fault." Then Joe got up. "Joe where are you going?" "I need to talk to someone. I'll be right back." "Oh God please don't Joe. I so do not want this to grow into a giant conflict. It's not that a big a deal honest." "Scott, please be quiet! I know it's a big deal. I know that because I care for you! I can see how deeply it hurt you. I just need to straighten this out." "Please don't..." I pleaded " I have to. I'll be right back. " With that he left the room with great big strides filled with purpose. I was so confused. I had no idea what was going on. I resolved a conflict but now it is all opened up again because Joe felt the need to be my hero, which is so sweet but I am not this fragile being that needs to be saved. I am my own person. I appreciate him and dare I say it, I love him for it. This is all too quick. I need my space! I grabbed my coat and headed out the door. I could hear some raised voices down the hall. I quickly walked toward the exit. I used my hand to brush my hair out of my face and I felt myself crying. Damn it! At least I could keep my emotions in check. I wasn't thinking as I moved down the hall and Wham!! I crashed into another body. "Oh, excuse me, I'm sorry." I apologized not really looking at the person. "Hey no problem, Scott." It was Lance. "Is there something wrong, Scott?" "No I'm fine." I said as I tried to smile. "Oh no you're not.Come with me." He grabbed my hand and led me back to the room I had just exited. He was Joey's roommate. That is just my luck. Lance led me in and sat me down on his bed (the neat one) and handed me a glass of water. "Okay, spill buddy." "No I'm fine, Lance really I am. " I explained. "Your eyes are red. So therefore you are not okay. Spill." I sighed and realized that this was going to be a long night. "Okay here goes. J.C, Justin and I all went to the art exhibit today. Justin was in a bad mood. He didn't respond to my sarcasm well. He said some things. So communication were uneasy until we worked them out. So we were on a decent level. Well, Joe over heard J.C and Justin talking about today and demanded an explanation, which I reluctantly gave. He then charged into Justin's room." I explained "Oh dear." Was all that Lance could say. I took another drink of my water and I excused myself to the bathroom. I stood in front of the mirror and splashed water on my face. I looked at myself. I reaffirmed a fact I had known for awhile. There is nothing special about me. I'm normal, average and mediocre even. In the words of Charlie Brown I'm straight "blah". I brought myself out of the bathroom to find Joey sitting on the bed next to Lance. He did not look happy at all. "I can't believe Justin. What ever inspired him to say such a thing. I'm sorry, Scott." "It's cool Joe, honest." I said uncomfortably. There was an awkward pause the filled the room. I sat on the bed next to Lance. "I'm sure Justin only said those things to make sure you weren't using us or anything.' Lance said reasonably "I'm sure that was the case..." I said quietly. I knew deep inside there was more to Justin's outburst but I knew now would never have a chance to find out. We sat again in silence for about three minutes. It seemed like eternity. The door swung open with slam. Justin was standing there not looking too thrilled to say the least. His eyes met mine and he glared. "Who do you think you are? Sending Joey in like that...If you still had a problem with me you should have told me. Not send another to do your work for you. You are so sad... With that intense need of yours to be liked..Wanna get a news flash, buddy, No one likes you" He said with such malevolent tone it stunned me. "Now, Wait a minute!" Joey exclaimed "What are you talking about.." That's all I heard be fore I started zoning every thing out and the tears started falling. I grabbed my coat and pushed myself out the door hearing but not listening to the protests of Lance and Joey. I grabbed and elevator and rode down. I didn't want to cry but I just couldn't stop. As I moved myself toward the front of the hotel so I could catch a cab J.C and Chris saw me as they went back up to their rooms. "Hey Scott" J.C said "Hi," I said with a lack of enthusiasm. J.C moved himself over to me and I stopped walking. "Scott, what's wrong?" "Nothing, I'm fine." I said faking a smile. "What are you doing?" "I'm catching a cab home." "Oh no you're not I'm taking you home." "Please don't J.C" I said "No, I insist. Chris tell the other guys I'll be back later." "Fine dude, Bye Scott." "Bye Chris" J.C and I said in unison We got into J.C's car and headed the way of my apartment. "So tell me what's wrong?" "Nothing...nothing important." I sighed "If it's bugging you this much it must be important." "I don't think so..."I said glumly "If this has you in tears and has you leaving the other guys without them offering ride it must be something big." J.C stated matter of factly. I sighed in irritation. "Okay it was big. Joe found out about my conversation with Justin this afternoon. After he got out of me what Justin said he charged in there and told Justin off." "Uh, oh" "We forgot the surprise ending J.C." I said flatly. "I was about to leave and I ran into Lance who made me recount the entire story and took me back to the room. Then Joey came back and we sat in the wonderfully uncomfortable awkwardness known as silence until Justin barged in and told me how horrible I was. Joey went to my rescue and fought right back at Justin. I then got up and left because I couldn't handle the tension. I'm coward I know." I said. "You're not a coward, Scott. You were in a situation you did not want to be in and you left. You are allowed to do that. It's not usually a good course of action but who are we to judge?" I nodded in agreement with this statement. He soon pulled up to my apartment building. I got out. "Thanks J.C." "No problem. If you need someone to talk to call me, okay?" "I will." "Good." "Bye J.C" "Bye Scott." I trudged my way up the stars in a cloud of confusion and despair for I feared that out of two people I lost a friend that night and made a worse enemy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 'till Next time all. Please write me I love you letters!!