|Brandis Redemption 7:
is a fictional story, describing erotic relations between consenting adult
men. If this makes you uncomfortable, or if it is illegal for you to read
something like this, then go find something else to do.
The following story is entirely a work of fiction, and is not intended to imply anything about any real people. All of the characters in the story are fictional, and must not be confused with any real people. The characters in this story may have the same names as some real people, but the characters are in no way supposed to actually represent any real people.
A word from Scoop: Sorry for taking so long to get chapter 7 out to you, but I've been somewhat busy lately. Anyway, here it is! I'll shut up now and let you see the outcome of everyone's actions. Catch ya on the flip side.
"This isn't happening, it can't be happening. I didn't sleep with him, there's no way I'd do that to Jared." Jon was trying desperately to convince himself that he was right, that he didn't sleep with Joey. But even as he unlocked his front door, he couldn't get the look on Joey's face out of his mind. That arrogant look that he had seen so many times before when he and Joey disagreed on something and Joey was right.
Jon shut the door and went directly up the stairs to the bathroom. He needed a shower to freshen up. Hopefully it would make him feel a bit better and he could be more objective about the whole situation. He turned on the water and adjusted the temperature. He had it set very warm at first, but decided he needed a cold shower to provide the quick jolt that he thought would wake him from this nightmare. He stepped in quickly so that he wouldn't be able to pull away.
"Yaah!!! Oh fuck that's cold!"
"Hey Jared, snap to it man, break's over."
Jared looked to his right to see Rob leaning in through the door of the delivery truck smiling at him. God Rob had a nice smile. OK, enough of that already Jared.
"Did you sleep last night?"
Jared's mind was still not up to full speed and forming a coherent thought was difficult. "Um, last night? I, uh, last night I was out for a bit."
"Oh? You and Jon having a little 'fun' then?"
Jared's memory came back to full force. He hadn't slept well because he was worrying about Jon. After he got off the phone with Tatyanna he had called Jon's house two more times and left short messages on his answering machine. When he got up this morning the first thing he did was check his messages to see if Jon had called back. He realized how stupid that was though since he barely slept and if the phone rang he would have had no trouble to hear it. If he wasn't almost late for work he was going to call Jon again.
"No. Jon and I have struck a bit of a rough patch."
Rob pulled himself up into the truck and sat in his seat. Jared put on his seatbelt and started the truck. He slipped the transmission into drive and was about to drive out of the lot when Rob grabbed the gearshift and pushed it quickly into park again.
"What do you mean a rough patch? Does this have anything to do with all that stuff on the news?"
"You could say that, yeah."
"Oh no, he didn't break up with you, did he?"
"No, I kinda broke up with him." Jared sighed and prepared for a stern lecture from 'getmesome' guy. As if he has the write to tell anyone about breaking up with someone. He's dumped more girls than Jeff Foxworthy has told stupid Redneck jokes.
"Oh well, better off anyway. All that celebrity crap is just a load of trouble."
Whoa, that was unexpected. "I don't mind the celebrity stuff. Could have been nice to go to the parties and stuff like that." Jared puts the truck back in drive and starts to pull out of the loading area.
"Well now you can find someone that actually does it for you and that won't embarrass you on national TV."
Jared jumped on the break sending Rob's head into the dashboard. "Ow! What the hell did you do that for?"
Jared's eyes were wide, burning with an intense anger. "Get this straight: I'm not going to get anyone else! Jon does it for me and it was no embarrassment to be seen on TV with him! I love him and you have no right to tell me what to do. You wouldn't know a good relationship if it jumped up and bit you in the fucking ass!"
Rob stared at Jared. He was breathing heavy and his cheeks were red. In a calm voice he asked Jared, "If you love him so much, why'd you break up with him?"
Jared's head snapped back as if Rob had hit him in the face. The answer to Rob's question was an easy one, but it was an answer he just didn't want to give. To tell Rob the truth would be to admit that he was scared, and that was something he had never done before, not to anyone outside of his own mind.
Jared put the truck in park yet again and removed his seatbelt. He opened the door and stepped down out of the cab. Before he slammed the door shut he looked up at Rob who had a look of complete confusion etched deep into his face.
"You just don't get it Rob. You just don't fucking get it." He slammed the door shut and walked away from the truck He couldn't tell Rob the truth, so he took the only way out that he knew, make Rob seem like the bad guy. Damn it he felt cowardly. What he needed was Jon. Jared had to get home and call Jon right away. They had to get back together - today!
Rob just sat there staring at him as he hailed a cab and left.
"Damn," said Rob as he rubbed at his quickly bruising forehead, "I thought Jon had managed to calm that temper a bit. Good thing they broke up: now Jon doesn't have to face it anymore."
Of all the thoughts running through his head, none of them were as strong as the feelings he was coping with. The most prevalent of these was self-loathing. He was almost sure he didn't sleep with Joey, but he still hated himself for even letting Joey take him to his house.
You passed out Jon, there was nothing you could do about it.
Bullshit, you could have told him to fuck off the second you saw him and that would have been that.
I know that, but the beer was clouding my judgment.
"Christ Jon, you and your god damned beer."
Jon stopped drying himself and straightened up. He had held debates with himself in his mind for years. Hell, who hasn't? But never have they led him to verbally challenge or attack himself. That scared him. But what scared him the most was his choice of words. That one sentence let slip his internal 'dogs of war.' His first two encounters with Jared were recalled, flashing repeatedly in the foreground of his thoughts.
That first night that Jared had walked into the bar he looked so damned hot! But Jon was with Joey and he would never cheat on Joey, not even with this Adonis. But then Joey left with another guy and Jon was by himself. Why wasn't he mad? Oh yeah, he was too drunk to be mad.
No, not true. He got very pissed at Jared a little later, but Jared had started it with that damned temper of his, and the fact that Jon was drunk didn't help matters any.
Full circle. Twice in the same night being drunk had caused him problems. He had lost Joey and was quickly screwing things over with the very gorgeous guy that was now covered in his own beer. Good thing Brad stepped in that night or things would have been really fucked.
Then there was the next night. Somehow they had met and decided to go out again the next night for a little while. How could Jon say no to that? Joey was gone and this guy was extremely handsome: a perfect way to rebound back from a low point in his life.
Rebound? Oh man, had Jared been nothing more than a rebound? The thought that Jared could mean nothing more to him than sex and revenge was... scary. Jon's stomach turned the more he thought about it.
Not possible. I love him. There's no way I could use him for a rebound. But, I didn't love him then. Maybe... no! I agreed to go out with him because he seemed like a nice guy. And he was damned cute too! I had a great time and so did he. Well, up until that little disagreement anyway. And surprise surprise, it was all about beer. Jared was only being considerate when he suggested that I stop drinking. And what do I do? Blow my top of course. And of course with his short temper he had to follow suit.
"We make the perfect pair." Jon pulled on his boxers and walked from the bathroom to his bedroom to get dressed.
Here's to fucking things up. Jared down as much of the liquor as possible. It was immediately spit back up into the sink, Jared coughing and sputtering to clear himself of as much of the offensive liquid as possible.
"Oh god! How can anyone drink this stuff?"
The only reason he had it in his apartment was for the scatter time that Rob would drop over for a visit. Somehow Rob had managed to acquire a taste for the stuff.
Jared emptied the remainder of the alcohol from the glass into the sink. He picked up the bottle and looked at the label. "How can you drink this Rob? Not even Jon touches this stuff."
Jon... the only reason I came home was to call Jon and here I am staring at a damned liquor bottle. Jared tipped the bottle upside down into the sink and walked away as it drained itself of the poisonous fluid that can cause so many problems.
"That's not so bad I guess." He pressed the play button and waited for the response.
'Jon, I love you and I don't care who knows it! I'll see you at lunch tomorrow, same time, same place. I miss you too much already. Bye babe!'
Jon stopped the playback and listened to the message again. The excitement he heard in Jared's voice filled him with a sense of relief. He was relieved that it was all over with, that he didn't have to be apart from the one person that he loved the most. But he was also filled with a feeling of deep fear. He didn't have a week to get things straight in his head. There was no time to figure out how he was going to explain everything to Jared, or even if he was going to tell Jared for that matter. All he had now was a little while before lunch.
"Lunch? Oh man, what time is it?" Jon looked at his watch and was greeted with 11:50. There was no way he would be able to make it in 10 minutes.
He grabbed his coat and started searching frantically for his keys. Before he found them, the phone rang. He was going to ignore it, but for some reason thought better of it.
"Hi gorgeous, what's up?"
"Hehehe, don't tell me you've forgotten my voice already."
"No, of course not. I'm just surprised that you are calling me at this time of day. Shouldn't you be at work?"
"I... uh, I didn't want to be there today. I want to spend the rest of the day with you."
Jon smiled at the sentiment. "That's so sweet babe. I was actually just looking for my keys so that I could meet you for lunch. I'm running a bit behind today."
"Good thing too, or else I never would have been able to reach you in time."
"Yeah, good thing."
"I guess it's true what they say, everything happens for a reason."
"Um, yeah I guess so." Then what is the reason for what happened last night? Jon tried to block the thought of Joey's house out of his mind. He didn't want Jared sensing through his tone of voice that there was something wrong and questioning him before he was ready to say anything.
"Jon?" Jared's voice had taken on a more somber tone.
"Can you come over to my place. We need to talk. I'll make us something to snack on and we can spend the entire afternoon in each other's arms talking. How does that sound?"
"Sounds great babe. I'll be over as soon as I can."
"Great. I'll get started on lunch. Can't wait to see you again."
"I can't wait to see you either."
"I love you Jon, bye."
"Bye." Jon hung up the phone and took a deep breath. Looks like he was going to have no other choice but to come clean with Jared. He was barely able to keep from telling him on the phone. He has no chance of not saying anything when he goes over there.
Jon noticed that the answering machine was still displaying three unplayed messages. He decided to listen to them later when beside the answering machine he saw his elusive keys. Although no one was around to notice his oversight, Jon blushed a light shade of red.
But now he stood here at Jared's front door, and he was actually afraid to go in.
OK, get a grip Jon. Jared loves you as much as you love him. He'll understand. He's seen you drunk before, he'll understand. He has to understand. Jon knocked on the door and took another nervous deep breath.
After only a few seconds the door flew open and Jared was standing there with a huge smile on his face. He grabbed Jon by the arm and pulled him inside. As soon as the door closed Jared took Jon into a big hug, holding him as tight as he could. Jon was slow to respond, but he also wrapped his arms around Jared.
I wish we could stay this way forever, thought Jon.
"Me too babe, me too."
Jon released Jared just as Jared released him. They stared at each other for a few seconds, shocked looks on both their faces.
"Uh, you didn't say that out loud did you?"
"No, I didn't."
Another sequence of silent staring followed before Jon finally spoke.
"Wow, that was... that was - "
"Yeah. We are so in tune with each other that I knew exactly what you were thinking. That just shows you how perfect we are for each other."
Jon considered what Jared had just said. "Yeah, I guess we were meant to be."
He stepped back up to Jared and placed his arms around his lover's neck. They stared into one another's eyes for what felt like hours before their lips touched and they kissed. It was a kiss long overdue. They had been through so much over the past few days: they deserved this kiss.
But for some reason Jon just didn't feel right kissing Jared. He felt guilty. Jon needed to tell Jared the truth, or at least as much of it as he knew. After that little moment of synchronicity, he was certain that Jared would understand.
"Jared, can we uh, can we talk?"
"Well yeah. That's the whole idea of this afternoon. We have some things to talk about."
I know I have some things to talk about, but "what is it you want to talk about?"
Jared walked away from Jon and over to the table. He started filling his and Jon's plates with some tossed salad. Jon just stood there and watched him. When he had one plate full, he stopped.
"I feel I need to explain why I did what I did. Why I felt we needed time apart. I... I owe you an apology."
Jon moved quickly over to stand behind Jared and placed his hands on his shoulders. He leaned in and kissed him on the back of the head. "You don't owe me an apology. You only did that to protect us. You had the right intentions, you just went a bit overboard with it."
"No Jon, I didn't have the right intentions. I did it because..." Jared went silent, unable to finish his sentence.
Jon turned Jared around and looked into his eyes. He could see the fear that Jared had. "Jared, don't be afraid to tell me. I'm here with you now and forever."
"I did it because I was afraid."
"Oh. What were you afraid of?"
"At first I thought I was afraid of being outed. But, I'm pretty open with that as it is. Suddenly this morning, it dawned on me. I was afraid of hurting you. Wait, no. I already told you that. Damn it! I just can't say it."
"Jared you can tell me anything."
Jared took a deep breath and looked into Jon's eyes. He saw in those beautiful blue eyes not only the strength he needed to tell Jon what he felt, but the strength to go through life with no fears at all. "I was afraid of all the attention. I was afraid that if people knew about us, they'd never leave us alone. We'd be hounded everywhere and I wouldn't have any time with you for myself at all." Jon looked at Jared and started to giggle.
"What's so funny?"
"You were being sweet."
"I was being selfish and childish."
"No, you were being sweet. You could have told me this before, I wouldn't have cared. I love the fact that you want to spend so much time with me. And as for the media, I don't like them all that much myself. And if you didn't want to go somewhere, we wouldn't have had to go"
"What about your movie opening. We would have to show up there wouldn't we?"
"You wouldn't need to go if you didn't feel like it."
"No, I want to be where you are and if you have to go, I have to go."
Jon looked Jared in the eyes again and the fear he had seen earlier had been replaced by love. He leaned in and closed his eyes, soon feeling what he needed: the feel of Jared's lips to his own.
"Now," said Jared breaking the kiss, "let's eat. I feel so much better now that I have that cleared up." He went back to putting salad on the plates.
OK Jon, Jared came clean with you, now it's your turn. It doesn't matter if what you have to say is a lot worse than what he told you. He loves you and if you explain yourself I'm sure he'll listen. Just be strong and stay calm. He'll understand. "Uhm, Jared?"
"There's something that I need to tell you too."
"Yeah. It's about last night."
Jared put down the bowl of salad and sat down at the table. "I was wondering when this would come up. Tatyanna and I went looking for you last night. I went to your usual bar and I was told that you had just left with a friend, that he was going to make sure you got home. I went home myself and called Tat to let her know. Then I called you. Twice. You didn't answer either time. I just figured you had passed out from drinking."
"Yeah. I did leave with a friend and he was supposed to take me home."
"Supposed to take you home? Meaning he didn't take you home?"
"uh, n... no. He took me back to his place."
Jared inhaled deeply and looked down at the floor. His face had lost most of its color. "Who was this friend Jon? Anyone I know?"
"It was... it was Joey."
"Joey? Joey as in, your ex Joey?" Jared's voice was shaky, and his hands were trembling as he held them in his lap.
"Yeah. Listen Jared I had passed out in the cab. He told me that he was going to get me home. He told Brad the same thing. I had no idea he was taking me to his place, I swear."
Jared's breathing had gotten heavier. He was nodding his head, as if forcing himself to believe what was being told to him. "OK, you passed out. The bastard lied to you. There was nothing you could do till you came to. What time was that Jon? What time did you wake up and leave?"
"About 8:30 this morning?"
"Jesus Christ Jon."
Jon's eyes were filling with tears. He could see that Jared was getting mad quickly. "Jared, please you have to believe me. I didn't mean for anything to happen. I - "
"Whoa! Whoa! You didn't mean for anything to happen? So something did happen, is that what you're trying to tell me?"
"Jared, I - "
"Did anything happen between you and Joey?"
Jared's voice was calm. Just hearing him asking the question made Jon think of arguing with Joey. He started to cry. The realization that if he told Jared the truth he would lose him was growing stronger all the time. Jon opened his mouth to answer, but the words would not come out. He instead started sobbing heavily, his body shaking with every tear. His legs gave from under him and he fell to the floor, wrapping his arms around his legs and burying his head between his knees.
Oh my god, thought Jared. He did. They did. "You slept with him. You slept with him, you son of a BITCH!"
"So you didn't sleep with him?" Please say you didn't Jon. Please...
"No. Yes. I don't know!"
"You don't know? How the fuck can you not know? Either you slept with him or you didn't, now which is it Jon?"
"I don't know all right?! I was so drunk I can't remember anything. When I woke up the next morning, Joey was just getting out of the shower. He told me that we had slept together and that I was great and - "
"Oh fuck I'm going to be sick." Jared placed his hand over his mouth.
"- and he showed me two used condoms on the night table beside the bed."
Jared sat at the table silently. He wouldn't look at Jon, he couldn't. The love of his life had betrayed him. This was the one person that he was ready and willing to spend the rest of his life with and he had betrayed him.
This can't be happening to me. Why did he do it. Why? Jared laid his head on his arms on top of the table and started crying. He felt used and cheated. He was too hurt to be angry. All he wanted to do was cry, and hope it all went away.
Jon looked at Jared again. "What?"
"I said 'fucking beer.'" Jared still would not look at him.
"Yeah, I know. It's been a - "
"Don't you fucking DARE!" Jared was past being hurt. Now he was angry.
Jon snapped back as if struck. "Huh?"
"Don't you even try to agree with me! You are not getting back on my good side by agreeing with me. I mean, Christ Jon, what were you thinking? You left the club with your ex-boyfriend. You got into a cab with him. He took you home. YOU FUCKED HIM! Don't you even try to get on my good side. You CANNOT get on my good side you stupid bastard!"
Jon was crying again. "Please Jared, I was drunk, I didn't know - "
"NO! You didn't think! You get on that god damned fucking beer and you stop thinking. I am so fucking tired of it Jon. You think I'm going to forgive you for fucking Joey because you were drunk?"
"I didn't say that I had sex with him. Joey told me we did, I don't know."
"Oh well, that makes it ALL better doesn't it? I mean, you were drunk what could you do? He took advantage of you right?'
"Bull fucking shit Brandis! He showed you two condoms. TWO! He might be able to take advantage of you and fuck you, but he can't force you to get a hard on and put on a condom. You fucked him.... oh my god. You cheated on me Jon. I loved you with all my heart and soul and you do this to me. How could you?"
"Loved me?" Jon looked at Jared, his face stained with tears and his eyes shimmering from those yet to fall.
"Yeah, past tense. How can I love someone who cares so much about me that he goes back with his ex for a night in the sack."
"But I do love you Jared. I love you with all my - "
"FUCK YOU! I don't even want to hear it! You have the nerve to say you love me after what you did? You are one lousy bastard you know that Brandis? I don't love you anymore, I... I hate you."
"No, Jared please, don't say that. You don't hate me."
"Don't I? You know me that well do you?"
"NO! If you knew me, you would have saved yourself the trouble of even coming back to me. Ugh, I don't want to see you right now, I don't even want to know you're in the same city as me. Leave. Just get the fuck out now."
"No. Jared we were meant for each other. I mean... what about earlier when you knew what I was thinking? And what about how you were afraid of going out with me if we were caught at the concert because you thought you wouldn't get enough time with me? Jared I need you. I can't go on without you. I love you Jared. Please, you have to understand."
"Haha. Understand? The only thing that I understand is that my EX-boyfriend cheated on me. What happened before was a fluke of nature, one in a billion shot that will never happen again. And as for me being afraid I won't get enough time with you, I've had enough. I don't want anymore time with you. So just get up off your ass and get out of my apartment."
"Jared please - "
"OUT NOW DAMMIT! DON'T YOU GET IT? I DON'T LOVE YOU! I HATE YOU, I WANT YOU OUT OF MY LIFE FOR GOOD! GO BACK TO JOEY, GO WITH TATYANNA, JUST GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU STUPID FUCKING, GOD DAMNED, IDIOTIC, BASTARD OF A PRICK!!!!"
Jared walked over to the door and opened it. Jon just sat there looking at him, hoping Jared would realize that he was wrong and that they were supposed to be together. Both of them were crying now. Jared didn't want to do this, but there was just no way he could trust Jon. Not after he has slept with Joey. He didn't hate Jon, he could never hate Jon. But he was hurt and he was unsure if he could love him anymore.
"Now Brandis, before I come over there and kick you out through the door."
Jon slowly got to his feet, never taking his eyes off Jared. He made his way to the door on his shaky legs. When he was standing next to Jared he stopped and looked at him, hoping to make eye contact. Jared closed his eyes and looked down at the floor. A tear fell from his face and landed on his left foot. Jon walked out through the door into the hallway. As soon as he cleared the door it slammed behind him. He kept going to the elevator and pushed the button. The doors opened almost immediately, as if they knew his need to leave.
Riding down to the lobby one thing kept going through his head. "He didn't understand. Oh my god... what have I done?"
"Up in his apartment, Jared fell onto his bed and cried tears enough to nourish a forest. "Oh my god... what have I done?"