Date: Sun, 17 Jul 2016 00:01:26 +0100 From: Mark Wright Subject: Emmerdale Lads Adam Barton and Aaron Dingle *Sitting in the Woolpack after a very confusing day with his girlfriend Victoria, Adam Barton was drowning his sorrows by sinking pint after pint in the Woolpack. Fuck his girlfriend for the way she spoke to him, fuck her for not seeing things from his point of view. Fuck her for not allowing him to explain anything and always jumping to the wrong conclusions. Fuck her in general. If she can't see what a fucking catch that he was, then fuck her.* *"Do you really think that's a good idea?" A voice said. A voice he would recognize anywhere- his best friend Aaron. "I mean, yeah it feels good now, but in a few hours you won't be thinking that".* *Adam shrugged. "Mate. I don't actually give a shit".* *Aaron took a seat at the table that he was sitting at alone. "Why don't we go back to yours and you can tell me what the fuck is going on? Victoria called me and she was in tears saying Adam's a cunt. I mean, yeah your a cunt- but it seemed weird coming from Victoria considering she usually worships the ground you fucking walk on".* *"I don't want to talk" Adam moaned "I want to get wasted. I want to get so seriously wasted that I can't walk straight. I want to get so fucking wasted that I wake up tomorrow with a headache- because seriously that headache will be alot fucking less stressful then the headache of living with a fucking woman".* *Aaron sighed. "You remember what happened the last time you got drunk? You went home with that slapper and nearly ruined your relationship with Victoria. Do you really want to do that again?".* *Rolling his eyes, Adam took another long gulp of his ice cold beer before speaking again. "I'm not going to cheat on her. She does my fucking head in, oh my God she does, but I love the fucking woman even though she drives me fucking insane"".* *"Plus the fact she would cut of your balls and make you wear them as ear rings" Aaron helpfully added.* *Adam chuckled. "There is that as-well bro".* *"So what's going on? Last night the pair of you didn't mind showing how much you loved each other. There was so much PDA going on I thought I walked onto a set of a porno".* *Adam sighed. "The girl is fucking crazy. We're living together and she wants to have a kid. I mean, I'm a fucking softie and I want a whole fucking football team of the little brats.. But after what went on with Vanessa, I'm not sure if I'm ready to start trying to my own family at the moment. She can't seem to process that.. She wants sex all the time, and that's not a bad thing- but it has to be on her terms, when she wants and how she wants, and it's even worse when she ovulating.. She's like some walking sex addict who's mission in life is to ruin my cock".* *Aaron rolled his eyes. "Mate- so your telling me the problem is your missus wants too much sex? Well damn son- some of us are lucky if we spend the night with anyone other then Mr Right Hand".* *"She got fucking pissy at me because I wouldn't have sex in the fucking toilets of McDonald's. She said something like "I need you right here and now" and obviously usually I would have her knickers off faster then you could finish the sentence "Not in a public place dude" but the fact that she only wants me to basically impregnate her is frankly intimidating.. I feel like a fucking walking sperm clinic when we should having sex because we want it.. "* *"So have you told Victoria that you don't want children yet? Victoria's got a good head on her shoulders.. frankly I'm surprised she is ready for a child".* *Adam sank the rest of his pint before signaling for Chastity to bring him 2 more beers. She rolled her eyes but done so anyway. "I've told her so many times. But she wants a kid now.. And it's scary. I can't even walk into my own home without her wanting to ride me".* *Aaron laughed. "I'm sorry mate.. But your problems are fucking funny. I never thought I'd hear the day that Adam Barton complained about too much sex. I mean, your the guy that slept with a hooker and she paid you. I mean.. It's just fucking funny!"* *"I know I'm a great shag. Actually, I'm probably the undisputed stud of Emmerdale.. but there's only so much fanny you can have in one day before you just really need a rest".* *"Well, I can't say that ever been a problem for me.. But I see your where coming from.. I think?" Aaron stated.* *Just then Aaron's phone rang. Looking at the screen, he saw it was Victoria calling. He answered it sceptically. "Hello.. No I haven't seen him.. Okay I will tell him.. No.. Oh Victoria.. Are you crying? Okay.. I'll tell him if I see him".* *"Well that's Victoria" Aaron stated "And she's on her way over here now".* *Adam stood up. "Shit bro, hide me. I mean it, she's doing my head in and I really need to stay out of her way for a while.. Dude come on, she's literally going to chop off my dick and feed it to me because I'm avoiding her".* *Rolling his eyes, Aaron said "Go upstairs into my room. I'll tell mum not to mention you was here".* *"Dude.. You are a lifesaver. I could kiss you right now.. But I'm running upstairs fast because Victoria on a mission is crazy Victoria and ain't no-one got time for that". He said before literally running out of the bar and into the back.* *Aaron walked to his mum. "If Victoria asks, you ain't seen Adam. He ain't here".* *Chas rolled hers. "They had another row love?"* *Aaron laughed. "You could say that".* *EMMERDALE HUNKS - EMMERDALE HUNKS - EMMERDALE HUNKS - EMMERDALE HUNKS* *As Aaron walked into his room. Adam was sat on his bed with a petulant look on his face.* *"Dude, you didn't bring anything to drink? What are you.. some kind of fucking monster?"* *Aaron rolled his eyes. "Look in that drawer by my head".* *Adam looked confused. "Ain't that where you keep your sex toys?"* *"No!" Aaron looked forlorn and blushed slightly "That was ONE time and it wasn't mine.. Robert left it here one time.. And dude shut the fuck up. Just open the drawer".* *Adam did as he was told and opened the drawer. And then a smile appeared on his face. "You are a literal life-saver. Like, oh my God". He pulled out a couple of miniature bottles of drink including his own personal favorite Whiskey.* *"When you live in the same house as Chas, sometimes you just gotta knock a couple of stiff ones back" Aaron stated.* *"Hey, let's not talk about your sex-life please, especially when I'm suffering from a severe crisis" Adam replied seriously as he opened the miniature bottle of Whiskey. * *"A severe fucking crisis? Your girlfriend wants to ride you like Sea biscuit and your hiding out in my room? Dude, you have issues bro".* *"This is serious dude. Look.. The other reason I'm fucking hiding from Victoria is a personal issue.. And I can't share it until I'm at least a little drunk.. so excuse me" Adam stated before he downed the bottle of Whiskey. "Oh shit, maybe that a mistake" Adam said as he sat down on the bed and suddenly * *felt sick. "You want one?"* *"No, I think at least one of us needs to be sensible tonight" Aaron stated. He looked at his best friend and pondered just what the fuck was going through his head? Why didn't he and Victoria just sit down and have a conversation. Life was too fucking short to ruin relationships.* *"Please yourself" he stated, before he downed another miniature bottle of Whiskey. "You know I fucking love that chick, She completes me, you know, I've never felt like this about a bird before bro. But the girl is seriously on cloud cuckoo land right now. She can't think without wanting to ride me like Sea biscuit. I know I'm a catch and everyone wants to get all up in this but I'm not prepared to be used for sex".* *Aaron rolled his eyes and sat next to Adam on the bed. "First of all, delusions of a grandeur much? Your average and you know it. Secondly, you and Victoria are literally the definition of a perfect couple- like seriously every time the pair of you are together I feel a bit nauseous at how just ordinary and obnoxiously happy you are. Seriously, it makes me literally want to vomit. Bro the pair of you just need to grow the fuck up, sit down and have a civilized conversation and stop acting like sex crazed teenagers".* *"Dude, harsh" Adam replied "But I guess your right. But that's not the only problem".* *Aaron rolled his eyes again, and seriously, this was starting to become a habit when he was with Adam. He'd never rolled his eyes as much in his life- and he doubt he ever would again. "Go on, tell Uncle Aaron. Seriously, All I seem to do lately is give out love advice. I should open an Agony Uncle column in the gazette- I'd make a fucking fortune".* *"Saying the words.. When I say the words it actually becomes fucking reality and I've been living in a bubble trying to hide the fact because I don't want this is to be true. I'm much too fucking young for this and it's just agony thinking that this could be happening to someone like me- I've never even had a paper cut before and now seriously I think I might be in grave danger". Adam looked like he'd lost a tenner and found 50p.* *"Mate.. Are you trying to tell me your sick?" Aaron asked and the look Adam gave him didn't do much to calm Aaron's fucking nerves. "Come on bro I don't know what your trying to tell me here and your kind of fucking freaking me the fuck out".* *Adam picked up another bottle of minute Whiskey. The last fucking bottle which meant Aaron was going to have go on a stealing spree once the Woolpack had closed for the night. He opened it and downed the fucker in one swift moment. "Dude" he breathed "This is serious.. Like legit.. I can't.. I can't get it up".* *Aaron was furious. He picked up his England cushion and threw it at Adam's head. "Dude, your telling me your fucking impotent? You fucker.. I thought you was dying or something. You cunt".* *"Dude this is serious.. My dick isn't working.. How the fuck am I going to go on without Big Adam satisfying the ladies so? It's like Robert Sudden without the bastardness or Andy Sudden without the fucking muscles.. It just doesn't work? I'm known around Emmerdale for my expertise sexual poweress and without that I'm just a normal fucking lad. Christ, I'm fucking you. Except hotter and less queer".* *Aaron groaned. "I think I might need one of them fucking drinks you motherfucking dick"* *"I don't know what to do Aaron.. Do I go to the doctors and tell them my cock isn't working? Do I tell them that every time Victoria wants sex my penis shrivels up and just won't whatever the fuck I do?"* *Aaron pondered this for a moment. "Wait a minute, you just told me your dick isn't working.. When was the last time you got a boner?"* *"About 2 hours ago" Adam stated "Actually, no, scratch that- about 45 minutes ago".* *"Now I don't say this alot Adam, you know me, I'm a calm motherfucker in literally every single situation.. But Adam Barton you are fucking confusing the fuck out of me. Like, every time you speak I feel like your losing a braincell. And if you lose your brains then well mate, your truly fucked. Average looks, no brain? Might as well just shack up with Sam Dingle and fucking just live a sexless but monogamous relationship".* *"Wait, bro, that's offensive because If I was gay I could do alot better then Sam" Aaron stated "I'm thinking I'd be Robert's bit on the side".* *Aaron pondered this for a moment. "You both have surprisingly hairy arses so you have that going for the pair of you".* *Adam looked a bit offended by that. "How the fuck do you know that my arse is hairy?"* *Aaron rolled his eyes- and he might as-well as this point have his eyes permanently rolled back because this was becoming a seriously annoying habit around Adam- and spoke "I know your arse is hairy because every time your drunk you pull down your boxers and tell me to kiss your arse because and i quote here "It's the best arse in the world and God was really being generous when gave me this arse".* *"That does sound something I would do. And say" Adam looked perplexed "But back to the important things- you don't think Robert would want to ride me like a Harley?" * *"No the important thing here is just a few minutes ago you told me your dick wasn't working. When it quite blatantly is".* *Adam sighed. "I can get hard. I ain't got that problem. Not really. Except when Victoria wants sex with me.. it just dies. Flat lines. Goodbye" * *Aaron pondered for a moment and pulled out a cigarette. He lit it. * *Adam groaned because Aaron smoking meant that Aaron had his thinking cap on and that was dangerous for all involved. Adam was thinking he may want to just run out and let Victoria have her way with- even if his dick refused to co operate. * *"It sounds to me that you do want to have sex with Victoria, but because your brain is thinking overtime about her using you just for sex- it's refusing to play ball. Literally, it just gives up. Like, you can get a boner but said boner dies the moment you clap eyes on Victoria because your thinking "Baby baby baby"" Aaron stated as if he was some kind of boner doctor or something. Does sucking dick make you an expert in all things cock related, Adam pondered to himself. "Which I was i suggest you literally grow a sack, go to Victoria and tell her what's on your mind. Then I'm like 90% sure your dick will rise like a Phoenix and your be shagging until sunrise".* *"That was kinda poetic and just a little gay" Adam stated to Aaron "But bro, that actually makes alot of sense in a weird fucking way . Like maybe I do need to grow the fuck up and go and tell the woman I don't want a baby yet but I kind of want to keep rocking her world for a while before we think about settling down".* *Aaron sighed a huge sigh relief. "You go and tell your missus how much you want to have protected sex with her. And I'm sure it'll be an amazing three and a half minutes".* *Adam actually looked offended. "Again, Bro- Harsh".* *"I'm gay. Girls tell me these things" Aaron said nonchalantly picking a bit of dirt out of his fingernails. "But don't you worry your pretty little head, she's always told me you try very hard",* *"But yeah I'm not going there tonight. No way. Tomorrow. I will grow my balls tomorrow"* *Aaron rolled his eyes again. "Fine. Whatever. Fine. Just if your staying here your having the fucking floor. Your feet stink and it''s making me nauseous".* *Adam sighed. "So Robert's arse- hairy? You wouldn't think it would you?* *"His basically hairless except That Ass and you know what? I've had my tongue up that".* *There conversation came to a halt when Adam's phone began ringing loudly in his pocket "Shit it's Victoria" he stated. "I need to answer this".* *Aaron just shrugged and got up from the bed. Adam answered the phone and Aaron thought, you know what, fuck it. Ride or Die. * *"Babe I'm staying at Ross's tonight" Adam spoke to Victoria "I feel like me and you need a day to cool our heads and in the morning I'll come round and we need to have a talk".* *Aaron sat back down next to his best friend Adam on the bed. In all there times of being best friends- Aaron had never wanted to fuck Adam. It just wasn't them. They were best friends and everyone thought it was "so amazing" that Adam's best friend was the local gay teen. Aaron may have had a little bit of crush on Adam when he first arrived in Emmerdale a few years back- but he was seriously confused about his feelings and sexuality back then. Adam was just there.. and he kissed him. Adam didn't respond of course-but he was just curious. Adam was a great friend to Aaron- they had been through so much bullshit together. Good times and fucking awful times. And what Aaron was about to do would probably ruin everything.* *He was curious.* *"Babe I love you too. You know I do babe. Your all I want.. but we need to talk. Somethings gotta give babe". As Adam spoke on the phone, Aaron went for it. In one swift motion, he pulled back Adam's jogging bottoms and shoved his hand straight into Adam's underwear and began stroking his cock. "What the FUCK?" Adam began saying as Aaron let go of Adam's slowly swelling prick and pulled the jogging bottoms further down. He wrapped a single, firm hand around Adam's member and began stroking slowly, teasingly. * *"No babe I just trod on something" Adam spoke into phone. He moved the phone aside for a moment and whispered "Dude, what the fuck?". Aaron shrugged. "I'm just hungry".* *While still stroking Adam's stiffening cock, Aaron moved around on the bed so that he was on his knees. He winked at Adam before he leaned down and gently licked the head of Adam's cut cock. * *"Oh my God" Adam groaned as he tried to pull Aaron's head away. "Victoria, babe, look I gotta fucking.." but the conversation was halted when Aaron stuck his finger in Adam's mouth, making him suck on his middle finger. Adam dropped the phone. "Dude, what the fuck?" Aaron halted all work on Adam's now stiff prick and put the phone to his ear. "Hey Victoria, yeah it's Aaron. Look Adam has had to rush to the toilet.. We had fish for lunch and yeah.. he's got a dodgy stomach. He'll call you back later.. Yeah, sure, bye bye" and he hung up, throwing Adams phone on the floor.* *"Dude" Adam shouted "Your fucking sick"* *Aaron shrugged "Looks like your boner problems fixed though".* *Adam looked down at his cock, and wow, he'd not been this hard for months. "You can basically cut wood with that and i hadn't even started yet.. Imagine what it'd look like if I took it right down my throat".* *"Dude" Adam stated. He was trying to portray nonchantlism but his leaky cock was telling a very different story.* *"I was hungry and thought I'd help myself to Cock of Adam" Aaron laughs "You should have seen your face".* *"Bro this isn't funny" Adam stated "You've violated me".* *Aaron sat down and lit a cigarette. Adam groaned. "What's upsetting you more Adam- the fuck I barely touched your penis with your mouth, or the fact you want me to carry on?" * *Adam sat down on the bed. "Bro"* *Aaron moved closer to Adam and inhaled on the cigarette. He leaned close to Adam and when Adam opened his mouth to speak- Aaron put his lips onto Adam's and blew the smoke into Adam's mouth. Adam- an ex smoker- took the smoke in and inhaled it back out. * *"I'm sorry" Aaron stated and Adam looked at him* *"Your sorry?" * *"I'm sorry I wanted to suck your dick and I'm sorry that it's taking everything in my power not to go down on you know and go to work on your impressive dick".* *Adam got off the bed and Aaron followed. "Your a fucking prick. I love Victoria- she's my everything".* *Aaron shrugged which got Adam angry. He grabbed Aaron by the throat and pushed him at the work. "You've just unleashed a fucking monster".* *Aaron- for the first time that night- genuinely did look apologetic. "I'm sorry".* *Adam looked at him. "Well I'm fucking not" and with that he pressed his lips onto Aaron's and kissed him.* *The kiss was rough. It wasn't a movie kiss- where you kiss with love- this was a rough, physical kiss. This was a needy kiss. There tongues were clashing, teeth clinking together. Hands pressing into thighs, semi hard cocks touching through material, no noise except small manly groans and the noise of kissing. This wasn't a fairytale kiss this was nothing but raw sexual chemistry and wanton physical desire.* *Aaron pulled away from the kiss and pushed Adam onto his bed. He dropped to his knees and pulled down Aaron''s tracksuit bottoms for the second time that night. Adam's rock-hard cock was there- long and proud- and Aaron's for the taking. Aaron didn't plan on leaving a single drop of Adam's cock dry tonight.* *Adam groaned as Aaron took his dick into his mouth. Aaron sank his mouth further down the shaft, teasingly, and it was all Adam could do not to cum on the fucking spot. Aaron was treating his dick like this was the last thing he was ever going to do. He was fucking reckless and Adam fucking loved it.* *"Fuck bro" Adam groaned as Aaron took his dick further into his mouth, sinking down onto his dick without a care in the world. Adam had clearly done this before, and it was both arousing and horrifying to think of that. Aaron looked up at him- his brown eyes watching him as Adam watched him go to town on his dick and fuck if that wasn't one of the most arousing things he'd ever seen in his short time on this planet.* *Aaron stopped his sucking and looked up at Adam. "Fuck my mouth" he said. Adam stood up and Aaron opened his mouth. His mouth was wide open, waiting. * *"Dude don't keep me waiting" Aaron stated.* *Adam gripped onto Aaron's shoulders as he thrust into his mouth. Aaron took the dick with gusto. Aaron was groaning as Adam continued to thrust his heavy dick into his best mate's throat. Adam watched as Aaron pulled out of his own cock and began slowly palming in whilst taking his dick like a champion.* *Adam had never had his dick treated like this. Victoria didn't suck cock. "You piss out of that" but Aaron was treating this dick like it was his fucking birthday present. * *Aaron pulled his cock out of Aaron's mouth and watched as Aaron wrapped two palms around his own cock and was jacking himself off slowly. He'd never noticed the size of Aaron's cock before- sure he'd seen it plenty of times, but he'd never really looked. Aaron's dick looked to be slightly shorter then Adam's own but it was much thicker. Like ridiculously thick- he'd even compare it to a fucking can of deodorant. * *"Can you take this all the way down?"* *Aaron looked up at him. "Bro that isn't a challenge. But yeah, I want that dick so far in my mouth that there's a chance it would pop out the other side of my head".* *"Bro that's a disturbing image" Adam stated. * *Aaron abandoned the work on his own and dick pulled Adam close to him. He pulled Adam's stiffy into his mouth and slowly took it down his throat. He didn't gag. Aaron took literally every single inch of his dick and was taking it like he was a professional cock sucker. Jesus it was fucking erotic to see such a sexy thing. * *For a split second, Adam thought he heard a flash or something. But Aaron didn't seem to notice anything as he sucked on Adam's length. Probably just his imagination. * *Adam thrust harder into Aaron's mouth as Aaron gripped onto Adam's bare arse. "Bro gonna cum real soon" he noted but Aaron paid no attention to the comment at all. Aaron instead looked up at Aaron with those brown eyes and fucking winked at him all whilst taking his cock down his throat. "Bro really I am gonna cum soon".* *Aaron stopped sucking on his dick and Adam literally groaned at that fact. Aaron placed three fingers into his mouth before he looked up at Adam. "Fuck my mouth but pull out before your about to cum. I want your cum all over my face".* *Adam wasn't sure why but that thought alone nearly made him cum without even touching his cock. "Shit Bro your a dirty bastard".* *Adam laughed. "Mate you know nothing"* *Adam thrust his heavy cock into his mate's mouth and Aaron's hands were exploring Adam's thighs and bum. Then and then suddenly he felt a sharp pain. "Bro what the.. Oh my God" and then pain turned into the single most pleasurable thing he'd ever encountered. Aaron pulled off his dick. "Bro do you like that cos I wanna fuck this virgin hole with this finger while you fuck the shit out of my mouth".* *Adam had never been touched there but oh my god had he been missing out. Adam felt Aaron's single finger get deeper inside his hole. Adam continued to thrust, getting harder and faster as Aaron's digit continued to penetrate it's way inside Adam's untouched hole. The new experience made his dick jerk with pleasure inside Aaron's mouth which he liked very much if that appreciative groan was anything to go by. * *And then that was it. Aaron's finger hit something inside Adam and his vision went blurry, he was literally cursing and then before he knew it, Aaron had taken Adam's cock into his hand and he was shooting the most intense orgasm of his life over his best mate's face. And it just kept cumming. Aaron kept hitting there with his finger and Adam kept spilling load after load onto Aaron's face.* *"Bro.. that was.. wow.. " Adam stated.* *Aaron grinned. "Yeah I know".* *Aaron stood up and walked close to Adam. Aaron wiped some cum of his face and placed the finger of cum into his mouth and sucked on it.* *"Bro" Adam stated and Aaron just winked at him.* *And then Aaron started speaking. "Well that was good. Let's hope your not going to have some big gay panic. I sucked your dick and maybe fucked your cute little bum a bit with a finger but I hope your not going to have some panic fit and start ignoring me".* *"Dude" Adam stated "Shut the fuck up".* *Aaron did as he was told.* *"I need a shower after that.. dude.. that was intense" Adam spoke* *"You know where it is" Aaron stated "Might wanna like.. not go like that" he laughed. "Also, do you need some company?"* *Adam grinned. "Not this time. Think we've shared a bit too much togetherness for one night".* *Aaron rolled his eyes.* *"But next time, maybe".* *Aaron looked at Adam. "Next time?"* *"Like I said earlier.. You've unleashed a fucking monster.. And there's consequences for that... " Adam grinned "To be continued".* *EMMERDALE EMMERDALE EMMERDALE EMMERDALE EMMERDALE EMMERDALE EMMERDALE* *As Adam walked to the shower, Aaron picked up his phone. Dialed a number and waited a few seconds. Then the phone was picked up on the other end.* *"It's done" Aaron spoke into the phone "Game 1 to Aaron Dingle".* WOW.. That was WAY longer then I ever anticipated it would be. Like.. Really longer. And maybe a bit too long? I hope ya'll like what I've written- and feedback would be appreciated. The next three chapters are already planned- and I'll tell you it features a foursome coming up. But if you have any ideas for future chapters holler right at me.