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Fate Brought Billy Gilman to Me
By Paul S. Stevens
As we all stood there staring at each other, enduring this dreadfully awkward moment, Colin spoke up.
"Hey, let's have an orgy!" He chimed.
With that being said, there was this long silence as everybody turned to stare at me. They were all waiting to see what it was I was going to say. They were all expecting me to be Barrett the level headed one, the one that always seemed to do the right thing, the one whose logic often found a way to kill the mood. They were all waiting for Mr. Common Sense to extinguish any hope of such an event by saying `Hell No' and putting a stop to all this nonsense.
"Why are all of you looking at me?" I innocently asked.
"We're all waiting to hear you tell us why we can't get down and party together," Spencer answered.
Normally he would've been right. Little did he know that there was a battle waging inside of me at this very moment. A dozen reasons why this was a bad idea flashed across my mind which were counteracted by the one fact that I was standing in this hallway with three smoking hot guys, each with a raging hard-on just wanting to party together and spread some love amongst friends. Recent events with Colin and Spencer had been wreaking havoc on my otherwise level-headed sensibilities.
On one hand, this would be the perfect opportunity to fulfill my growing desire to be with Colin openly without having to have an affair behind Billy's back.
On the other hand, I would always feel I betrayed my lover, especially now that our relationship was succeeding and was on-course to growing into a lifelong commitment.
Then again, the thought of having wild unbridled sex with these three gorgeous guys in a hot four-way orgy was beginning to overpower the restraint I was trying to hold onto. I definitely felt a sense of weakening as my mind continued to struggle with this inner conflict. Once again I quickly checked over the three steaming hot sexy bodies that stood before me and I felt my resolve begin to crumble and cave in.
Before my determination waned completely away, another thought came to my attention. It was the fact that if we went ahead with this, it would definitely change our relationship we currently share with each other as roommates and lovers, possibly plunging it all headlong into a disaster.
After pondering all these thoughts and weighing the pros and cons, I was ready to let my choice be known.
"Let's Party!" I said throwing my arms up in celebration. Everyone started jumping up and down as an infectious party atmosphere began to fill the hallway.
"Colin," Billy said trying to calm everyone down a little. "You and Spencer hop in the shower first and get freshened up. Barrett and I will be right behind you!"
Billy and I went back into his room as the others showered. I sat down on the foot of the bed as the impact of what I had just said hit me like a ton of bricks. What have I done, I asked myself, what am I going to do? I can't take it back any more now. I started to panic as an overwhelming sense of regret filled my head.
"You're being really quiet Barrett," Billy said. "What are you thinking about?"
"This isn't going to change anything between you and me is it?" I cautiously asked him.
"Well, of course it will," Billy said boldly.
"What do you mean, how?" I asked with a fearful tone.
"Well first, I won't just think of you as a stiff inflexible prude anymore," Billy said.
"Is that how you see me, a stiff inflexible prude?" I asked holding back any indication that I found that comment particularly hurtful.
"Well, your view of sex, love and relationships can be pretty rigid sometimes," he said. "Don't worry though Barrett, I've always known I'd find those qualities in you somewhere. This makes me really happy to know that you're starting to have some flexibility amongst all those strict ideas of yours."
Was Billy right? Was I being too unwavering in my thinking and too steadfast in my values? Was I just being an old stick-in-the-mud at my tender age? Was I being an old buzzard? Did my birthday banner correctly state I was twenty-two years old and over the hill? Was I too set in my ways to change or at the very least bend a little?
"I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was being so arduous," I said protecting my damaged ego.
"I love you no matter what," Billy softly whispered as he came over to me and hugged me tenderly.
That's all it took. I instantly melted on the spot. He had a genuine and heartfelt way of conveying his thoughts that made me experience a flash of adrenaline as those words of poetry coursed though my veins like a drug.
"I love you too and I hope you never forget that," I said as Billy caught me wipe away the accumulation of moisture that was forming at the corner of my eye.
"Hey Barrett, as long as we are together we'll be okay," he said squeezing my body as he hugged me, hoping I could feel the warmth of his sincerity.
Well, it worked because I immediately felt his gesture settle my nerves. My body relaxed and I felt the tension slip away. My insecurities faded as his words gave me the strength in knowing where I stood with him.
A moment later we heard Colin and Spencer laughing in the hallway. They had just come out of the shower and were coming into the room with us with smiles on their faces, their naked bodies smelling fresh and looking hot.
"Okay you guys, it's your turn," Colin grinned.
"And don't take too long either or we might start without you," Spencer added.
"You do and you'll be the first one I fuck when I get back," Billy playfully warned.
"Yeah, promises, promises," Spencer quipped as he whipped his body around, bent over and spread his but cheeks apart to symbolically moon Billy with a butt-kiss.
Billy and I took our turns in the shower next and we quickly assisted each another to maximize our speed so we could get finished and get our orgy started.
Even now, I was still having second thoughts about what I'd just done and the long term effects it was going to have on all four of us. At the same time that I was mentally contemplating the dynamics of these thoughts, my physically unwavering erection became the one thing that was actually making most of the decision for me. My Dad would have simply warned me to `stop thinking with my little head'.
Billy and I stepped out of the shower and dried each other off as we set out to join the others waiting for us in Billy's bedroom. Spencer gave us a wolf whistle as we entered the room and with that, our group orgy was off and running.
I didn't know what it was I was going to do first or with whom. It turns out I didn't need to worry about that. No sooner did I kneel on the bed when Colin reached out for me and pulled me to him and gave me his version of the `Billy Gilman' kiss. He used what I had described to him earlier about his brother's one-of-a-kind kiss to deliver what he knew was a knockout of a kiss that I had no immunity against. He put both of his hands on my face, caressed my cheeks and looked deeply into my eyes. Then he pulled me close and kissed me with his eyes open and his mouth beckoning. I closed my eyes and let my imagination take over. I began to fantasize that I was meeting Billy for the first time, but this time we were both eighteen years old and we were much younger and more na´ve about things. Because Colin was physically a younger version of Billy, this fantasy was alarmingly realistic and convincing to me. Slightly startled, I opened my eyes to look over at Billy. He was totally engrossed and lip-locked with Spencer no doubt giving him his infamous `Billy Gilman Kiss'. He was completely oblivious to the advances that Colin was making with me. This was almost more than I could endure. I started to move towards Billy to get him to notice me when Colin pulled me back over to him again.
I tried to convince myself that all this was okay and acceptable and that I should try to go along with whatever was happening and enjoy myself. After all, this was a four-way orgy of sorts and as such, nothing should be off limits. So I reached over to Colin to return the kiss he had initiated. As Colin's tongue explored the interior of my oral cavern he reached down below and unexpectedly grabbed my package and started stroking my cock and massaging my balls. This is officially when I passed the point of no return as I reached down and returned the gesture Colin had instigated. I found it surprising that Colin's cock was about an inch longer than his brother's but Billy had more girth to his cock and substantially more mass in his balls. There's no doubt that if Colin continues to grow, we'll have his older brother beat in nearly every respect.
Billy was the first to move things to the next level. He worked his way down Spencer's body, nibbling on his small nips and finally arriving at the prize. He began to work on Spencer's cock using all the tricks and techniques I had been teaching Billy during our hot and steamy sessions. Watching him pleasure Spencer in this way was both erotic and aggravating. Colin sensed I needed to have my focus pulled away from Billy and back over to him again. This was Colin's chance to demonstrate to me just how he truly felt about me. He was going to prove it to me regardless of the fact that his big brother was right there in the room with us. He worked his way down my body in the same manner Billy had just done with Spencer. Soon I was experiencing the heavenly feeling of Colin's lips nursing on my swollen and throbbing member. That's when Spencer leaned over to me to initiate our first contact. With both hands, he cuddled my face and kissed me for the first time. At the beginning, all I could think of was that Billy's unique kissing techniques were really starting to get around. I was getting my third version of the `Billy Gilman' kiss from yet a third set of lips.
It wasn't long before Spencer's subtle variations became quite evident. He released my tongue that he had been sucking on and proceeded to nibble on my ear, expertly giving me a unique tongue bath. Colin realized his sucking endeavor was insufficient in keeping my attention on him so he expanded his efforts by sliding his finger in my back door. He quickly located my prostate button and began ringing my bell like a customer trying to get the attention of the desk clerk. I gasped as the pressure he was applying was accelerating things a bit too quickly.
Without saying a word, I maneuvered us into a different position. I moved Colin onto his side and I got the two of us into a sixty-nine position. Colin resumed his blowjob on me, alternating from my cock to my balls giving each one of my delicate orbs some tender loving care. Now it was my turn to return the gesture and demonstrate to Colin my feelings for him.
I drew his slender penis into my mouth letting my tongue explore every inch of his member. I deep throated him, sealing my lips around the base of his cock. I siphoned out all the air I could, creating a vacuum and applied as much pressure as possible while wiggling my tongue around the head of his cock. His body squirmed and he began passionately moaning while he struggled to keep up his end. I reach between Colin's legs and played with his puckered rosebud, not entering it but simply toying with it. I got a rhythm going between my pulsing vacuum effect on his cock and a tapping at his backdoor. Colin once again slipped his finger into my ass and attempted to resume what he had started to do earlier. Each time he attempted to move too abruptly, I let him know it by using my finger to deliver a small non-verbal warning to his ass. Fortunately, Colin was a fast learner and our unspoken body language quickly put us in sync.
During this time, Billy and Spencer followed our lead by getting into a sixty-nine position of their own. All four of us were getting our dicks sucked and our ass fingered as we all started to get heavily into it. It was Spencer who decided it was time we switched partners. As he looked the three of us over, he concluded that Colin was already Spencer's mate and Billy was Colin's double in many respects so Spencer looked to me now as someone completely new to explore. Unknown to me, Spencer had been fantasizing about the two of us getting together since we met just prior to moving here. This little party was proving to be quite revealing about the dynamics of our secret private thoughts and ideas about one another. Spencer pulled me to the foot of the bed and put me on my back. He started off by gently rolling each of my testicles around his warm slippery tongue giving me chills that ran up and down my torso. No one had ever sucked my balls so delicately or sensuously before. I instantly started to form a new appreciation for Spencer and his well developed style and expertise.
As Spencer worked his magic on me, I witnessed a scene on the other side of the bed that got me hotter than any porn video could ever do. Billy and Colin settled into a sixty-nine position and shared some hot brotherly love with each other for the very first time.
I was finally beginning to get into the spirit of things as our activities moved from hot to steamy. Spencer slowly began to move down into my perineum zone radiating even more tingling sensations throughout my body. Once he made it to my sphincter muscle, I received the most awesome rimming I've ever experienced. Spencer's talents at rimming were truly as spectacular as his magic act. I began to wonder if Colin knew how truly blessed he was to have such an amazing partner.
I was enjoying the ride that I was being taken on but I knew where this was all heading. Spencer was making this extraordinary effort to prepare his way to enter me. As versatile as Billy and I have become recently, bottoming was still one of the things I was least fond of. No sooner had these thoughts crossed my mind when Spencer moved into position. Standing at the foot of the bed, he pulled me closer to the edge and then lined up his stiff rod with my puckered anal lips. In two seconds flat he forged his way in filling me to capacity. Now that Spencer's cock had entered me, I suddenly became acutely aware of the fact that Spencer was the most endowed of all of us in the room and it was quite a task to accept his massive incursion. I unintentionally let out some rather loud groans as my intestines expanded to accept such a substantial intruder.
Colin had secretly wanted to suck his brother's dick for many years now and that was yet another fantasy that was being fulfilled here tonight. Despite how much he fantasized about his brother, his lusting for me was just that much more overpowering to him. While Spencer was sensuously servicing my back side, Colin came over to me to deliver some love and attention to my front side. He kneeled beside me on the bed and drew my cock into his mouth while he played with my erect little chest nips with his free hands.
Looking for somewhere to fit in, Billy positioned himself behind Spencer and proceeded to fill his beckoning void. I could feel Billy's elusive presence as Spencer's hips would hit their limit on his in-stroke and then a half a second later I would feel the second strike as Billy would reach his limit on his in-stroke as he hammered Spencer's ass. I fantasized that I could feel Billy's cock in me as his amazing organ was somehow able to push its way past Spencer's anal cavity and out his penis to gently brush my internal prostate button. All this fantasizing I was doing caused me to surge forward into an oncoming orgasm.
Colin turned himself around from where he was and climbed up on top of me. With his body firmly on top of mine he began to grind our two cocks together and kiss me at the same time. I became acutely aware of where everybody was and what they were all doing. I got electrified at the thought of how all of that was making my climactic juices start to boil. I experienced small surges as my seminal fluids began to rise up and climb to their summit. Billy was slamming it into Spencer's ass, Spencer was pumping it into me and Colin was on top of me grinding our cocks together and stuffing my mouth with his tongue. Everyone's moans escalated as the sexual tension spiraled wildly out of control.
We all knew we were on the verge of an all-out orgy shoot-off. Billy was the first one to withdraw and sit down on the bed. He was preparing to stroke himself to climax. Spencer followed next and withdrew from me and sat down to Billy's right. Just before Colin rolled off of me, he whispered something in my ear.
"Three Words, Two Hearts, One Kiss!" he said tenderly.
He kissed me one last time and then proceeded to roll off me. Then he sat down next to Spencer and that left me to join them in our very first circle jerk showdown. I was extremely turned on sitting here with my three friends as we all watched each other pound our cocks in anticipation of who was going to blow their load first and how far. I felt so close that I was sure I was going to be the first to sperm. The heaving and moaning had escalated to a fever pitch when Spencer announced his arrival.
"Here it comes, Oh good God I'm gonna shoot it!" Spencer said
"Oh boy, she's gonna blow," Billy shouted out next.
The two of them began to shoot their uncontrollable explosions as their cock rockets fired one shock wave after another in a sensual display of male fertility. Spencer fired his first aerial projectile first, passing his left shoulder and coming to rest on the silky surface of Billy's bed sheets. Billy shot his first airborne missile across his own body and landed on Spencer's right forearm. The two of them shot several more rounds before they both ran out of ammunition. As I watched the two of them perform their shooting spree my oncoming climax lurched forward and I prepared myself to be next.
"Bombs away," Colin said and sure enough, he beat me to it.
"Fire at will," I called out to try to stay within the subtle theme that our Grand Finale had taken on.
Colin's trigger happy cock had shot its first round successfully, nailing me right across the lips. I opened my mouth and drew in a sample of Colin's sweet boy cream. The taste of Colin's cum was so intense that it seemed to carry an encrypted message with it that gave me an insight about who Colin really was. I gained an instant understanding and appreciation for Colin that I could never have received any other way. Not to be outdone, I leaned to my left and squeezed the trigger on my own weapon and declared a direct hit to his right cheek. The two of us continued to devastate each other until we had depleted our reserves. Colin took a finger swipe across the cream I had nailed him with and drew it across his tongue to imprint my essence into his memory. Billy thought that was brave of his little brother to taste his first sample of jizz but I knew what the real implications were of that elusive gesture, having experienced it first hand myself.
All four of us sat quietly for a moment as we wound down from having depleted our combined arsenals. We each had held our ground until the last of us had drained our precious weapons of every last drop of firepower. We sat motionless as we each wore the battle scars we had fervently inflicted upon one another. The spoils of war were dripping and commingling together on our bodies as we each claimed victory in what will go down in history as the legendary Gilman sperm bath.
"My God that was fun," Spencer said breaking the silence.
"Man, we've got to do this more often," Colin said. "We were awesome!"
Billy said, "We could definitely do this again if..."
Then just like before, everyone looked at me and waited to hear what I had to say. Without saying a word, I reached out and pulled everyone into a group hug. As I did, I wiggled and rubbed my torso from side to side in order to spread our communicable battle stains evenly against our combined bodies.
"I think we got our answer," Colin said.
"Absolutely," I said. "Count me in!"
Everyone squeezed me a little tighter letting me feel their approval.
"It's shower time again," I said. "Who's first?"
"Us," Spencer and Colin said in unison.
We all showered and cleaned up before heading to bed for the night. Spencer and Colin had settled into bed together and soon they were off to dreamland.
"That was quite a nice gift you gave to everyone tonight," Billy said softly.
"You didn't think I had it in me did you?" I sarcastically said.
"No, I didn't," he said honestly.
"Gee, thanks," I said flashing a hurt look.
"You have to admit that sometimes you can be a bit of a Holy Roller," he said. "I'm just happy you found a way to loosen up a little. Now that you did, you had a good time, right?"
"Well yeah, I had a great time. I'm just hoping we all didn't make a big mistake, that's all!"
"You'll see, we'll all be just fine," he comforted. "Come to bed now, I wanna spoon with you!"
"How can anyone turn down an offer like that?" I said as I slipped into bed and spooned next to Billy, our naked bodies melted together as we became one. With a mind of its own, my semi-erect cock sought comfort in the crack of Billy's flawless bubble butt cheeks. It was here that we fell into a blissful slumber.
I awoke the next morning to find that we hadn't really moved much throughout the night. The one big difference was, my morning wood was planted firmly into Billy's behind. As if it possessed a mind of its own, my cock was seeking to enter Billy's nearby slumbering orifice. I gently removed my stiff member out of his warm comfortable crack and then calmly stirred Billy awake. He smiled as he opened his eyes and then reached up to give me a good morning peck on the cheek.
"What," I complained. "I don't get a real kiss?"
"I've got doggy breath," he confessed. "I was just saving you from the agony."
"We're life partners now," I said. "We're supposed to share the good things as well as the bad. Besides, I've got doggy breath too!"
"Yuck, get away," he laughed and pulled the pillow over his head. I started growling like a dog and playfully pulled the pillow away from him. I jumped up on top of him and tried to kiss him as he melodramatically pushed me away until our lips finally met.
"Oh God you were right," I said.
"Right about what?" he asked.
I got on all fours and raised my head to the ceiling. I reached deep down inside myself and let out an inspired howl like an Alfa Wolf baying at the full moon, "Ahooo..."
"You bastard," he said as he hit me with his pillow. He jumped out of bed and I chased him down the hall and into the shower, howling all the way. We enjoyed a brisk shower together and then brushed our teeth vigorously, twice to be safe. Our morning was now off to a `howling' good start.
Today was an important day
for Billy. He was meeting with Jesse
The first track on the album and the first song Jesse and Billy were going to record together today was entitled "Wanted, Dead And Alive", a song about being pursued, primarily by the law (who wanted them dead) and romantically by the ladies (who wanted them alive). It had a great beat, clever lyrics and a memorable melody.
I was so excited to be present at this historic event and I had to remind myself that I was an observer and nothing more. I needed to keep my distance, out of the way of the professionals who knew what they were doing and were paid quite well to be in charge. Anything I had to say could be said when Billy and I were alone, one on one. I didn't want to cause any trouble for Billy or Jesse. I especially didn't want to draw any attention to Billy's unspoken relationship with me by accidentally revealing something or unintentionally saying anything to embarrass him in front of his peers or professional staff. I felt truly honored that Billy trusted me enough to let me tag along.
For me, watching the studio recording process was more fascinating than watching a taping of a television sitcom. The genius of the producing staff and the electrified talents of the musicians came together into an awe-inspiring spectacle of wonder. I instantly felt that this was where I was meant to be. I was determined not to become what Yoko Ono was to the Beatles by knowing my place and keeping my mouth shut.
Billy's first recording session went well and everybody got along great with each other both professionally and personally. I learned a great deal by just observing and watching. I also came away with a far deeper respect and appreciation for what Billy and Jesse do for a living. After the initial vocal tracks had been laid down, the producers brought in the backup singers and a couple of the solo guitar players so they could add their parts while we went to dinner and then turned in for the night.
As we got into the studio's
limousine, Jesse suggested that we eat at the restaurant inside the hotel where
we were staying, that way after dinner we could go straight up to our
room. I experienced some brief anxiety
as my memory flashed back to my first trip to
We nervously took our seats and silently stared at each other for a minute. Once we were handed the menus, we quickly opened them up and tried to act interested in the culinary choices. There was a lot of ambient noise in the restaurant and I felt that I could speak freely in a low tone without anyone nearby hearing us so I broke the silence and spoke.
"You know, you guys are acting like I'm so fragile that I'll break if you say something," I said. "I'm a big boy, I can take it. What's done is done, that's all in the past. I've forgiven you, both of you!"
Jesse and Billy looked at each other for a moment and then looked at me.
"You sure you're all right?" Jesse said. "No hard feelings?"
"I don't blame you at all," I said to Jesse. "I never did. If circumstances were different, I might have joined you."
"You actually said that to me on the day it happened but I didn't think you really meant it," Jesse said.
"Well, I'm not the same guy you met the last time we were here," I explained. "I've done some personal growing and so has Billy."
"Oh I see," Jesse said. "How so?"
"I'm not quite as uptight as I used to be and Billy is not quite as promiscuous," I revealed.
Billy looked sternly at me for a moment and then said, "Yeah, I suppose it's true."
"Okay then, I'll tell you
what," Jesse said. "When we go to
"Okay, what is that?" I asked.
"It's an exclusive underground gay sex club for celebrities and dignitaries," Jesse disclosed. "Xes is `sex' spelled backwards and is pronounced `Excess'. I'll take both of you with me as my personal guests. You'll love it. The place is huge. You just wander around from room to room until you see something you like. They have a full staff that caters to your every whim. At any time, you can get drinks... towels... lube... condoms... cock rings... dildos and just about anything you could think of. They have a swimming pool, several hot tubs and a huge open shower room that can accommodate twenty. They have a dedicated torture room, leather and bondage room and full scale gang bang room. They have a D.J. that will play requests while you take your mate around the nude dance floor. There's sex going on in every room, even in the showers. Personally, I don't know how they did it, but in the basement they have a transportation room with a real subway car. Hell, you can even get laid on a motorcycle or the back seat of a 57 Chevy."
"No shit, that sounds so hot!" Billy said with a bit too much eagerness. "I'm gonna hold you to that."
This time it was me that gave Billy a stern look. It did sound hot but I was a little annoyed with Billy's exuberance.
"Barrett, what do you say? Are you in?" Jesse asked.
My initial answer to that would normally have been a swift and decisive `No', but I realize now that if I continue to stifle Billy's desires, I might start pushing him away. I've come to the realization that I had better start nurturing Billy's natural tendencies before he starts to seek out ways to pacify them without me. If I allow this, I'll be giving Billy his freedom and letting him fulfill his desires. If I'm by his side, I might be able to keep things from getting out of control.
"I'm in," I said to Jesse.
As I looked at Billy, his eyes widened and his jaw almost dropped to the table.
"Alright then, it's a done deal!" Jesse said to both of us.
Once that was decided, the rest of our evening went smoothly.
We had a delicious dinner and shared some amazing conversations. Jesse talked about the album and the direction it was taking. He also talked about his career, his public life and his private life. I was delighted he was so open and I was deeply fascinated to hear these stories from Jesse himself.
Billy also bared his soul about recently `coming-out' to his parents. He talked about how his brother Colin had run away from home and how he came to live with us. Then he talked about how he almost lost his two long time friends, Derek and Camera.
Then the conversation turned to me. I ended up retelling the fateful story of how Billy and I met in an upscale California Hotel elevator during a rolling blackout in the middle of a record breaking heat wave. I don't think I left out a single detail, including how we got separated without knowing how to contact each other. Jesse thought my story was classic. A tragic love story that was filled with erotic passion and heart felt romance, a story that apparently had a happy ending. After dinner, we said goodnight and exited the restaurant. To our surprise, Jesse walked with us to the elevators. He neglected to tell us that we were all booked in the same Hotel. Because Jesse and Billy were working together, they shared the same promoters from Jesse's record label. These guys were a bit more generous about our accommodations than Billy's promoters. It turned out that Jesse got the same suite he had the last time we were here and we were booked in a slightly more expensive room, several floors higher than our last visit. Once we were settled into our room, Billy and I shared our thoughts for the day.
"That was really nice what you did down there," Billy said.
"You mean about consenting to the Cub Xes thing?" I asked.
"Yeah, that," Billy confirmed. "You don't really have to do it if you don't want to."
"No, no!" I said. "The more I think about it, the more excited I'm getting. I am a little scared though when it comes to group sex. I enjoyed our little foursome with Spencer and Colin last night but even that is nothing in comparison to what goes on at a place like Club Xes. Just the thought of there being so many bodies, so many strangers, so many cocks, so many asses. Shit, I think I'm starting to get myself turned on here."
"That's good," Billy said batting his eyes at me. "Come on over here. There's nothing like having sex in a Hotel room. How about letting me spoon up against you tonight?"
"Sure," I said as I crawled into bed next to my sexy partner and let him snuggle up to my backside.
It had been a long and exciting day and we were both dead tired. We enjoyed being comfortably close with each other and sex gave way to contentment. Nothing more happened because we both surrendered to exhaustion and fell asleep in record time.
Our second day of recording was just as rigorous and demanding as the first. When we heard the playback for the first time, we were surprised as to how much it had changed overnight. The guitar solos had been rendered and the background vocals were in place. We were shocked to hear the orchestrations had been added as well. We didn't know the orchestra had been scheduled to come in late last night and now, the entire song started reaching stellar proportions. Today, it was Jesse and Billy's job to clean up some spots and re-record certain lyrics that had been re-written during the night. By the end of the day, the song was finished and ready to move on to the post-production team for processing and mastering.
Now that Billy and Jesse
were done for the day, the time had come to take me to the airport. The limousine driver took all three of us to
the terminal. I had a hard time saying
goodbye. Having witnessed the first two
amazing days of the recording process, I really didn't want to miss the next
five. I dreaded not being able to watch
the album grow and evolve into something wonderful. I also started thinking about what Billy and
Jesse might be doing at night without me around, especially being registered in
the same hotel together. I tried to keep
in mind that I would be returning to
When I arrived back in
Shortly after I fell asleep, something woke me. I opened my eyes and discovered that Colin had slipped into bed with me.
"What are you doing?" I asked in a rather surprised tone.
"Cuddling," he said in his unique boyish voice as he wiggled his naked body to get closer to mine.
"I know that," I said. "What I want to know is, why?"
"Because I love you!" he said sounding surprised I had to ask.
"Does Spencer know you're here?"
"He's asleep," he said. "He's a pretty deep sleeper. He'll never know I was gone. Let me stay for just a little while. Please, don't kick me out."
What was I going to do? I was feeling a bit vulnerable right now being so far away from Billy. This is exactly what I feared Jesse and Billy might be doing together at this very moment without me there. It never crossed my mind that the same thing could possibly happen to me here. Once again, the physical similarities that Colin shared with his brother were starting to cloud my judgment.
"Okay, we can talk for a little while," I told him, "but you'll have to leave before you fall asleep, deal?"
"Deal," he said.
We talked for a little while about unimportant matters. As we did, Colin would sweetly and delicately let his hands roam about my body, at first, very innocently. It felt so good to be touched in such a tender and affectionate way. Then his wondering hands began fondling me in an increasingly erotic way. Before I knew it, we were both horned up and sporting full erections. I can't believe I let this happen to me again. The boy had succeeded in mercilessly seducing me.
"Stop! I can't do this," I said.
"You always say that but I know you love me," he said.
"You're right, I do love you, but I can't do this to Billy," I said.
"Billy is in another state, he'll never know," he said.
"I'm counting on Billy to stay faithful to me by keeping his hands off of Jesse while I'm away. If I'm going to expect that from him, I have to stay faithful too, for the same reason," I explained.
"Wow, Billy and Jesse together," he remarked. That is so hot!"
"It's not hot at all!" I sneered. "It's not cool for Billy to cheat on me!"
"That's not cheating," he said. "That's just having fun."
"There's no doubt you're Billy's brother," I said. "Billy used to think that way too when we first met, but I know that he knows better now. When you're in a relationship with someone, having sex outside the relationship is cheating. No two ways about it! You yourself are very close to cheating on Spencer right now. The group sex party we had the other night is different. We all consented. But if Spencer found out that you're about to have sex with me without his consent, he'd be devastated. Think about how you would feel if you found out that Spencer had been fucking some other guy without your knowledge. I'll bet you'd be fuckin' pissed with him. You might never want to see him again. You might even try to find out who the other guy was so you could hunt him down and shoot his fuckin' balls off, right? If you want your relationship to flourish and thrive, you can't cheat!"
I could see in Colin's eyes that he was deeply disappointed that nothing was going to happen tonight. At the same time, in those same eyes, there was this far away look of hope. I could see the wheels of his mind began turning. Maybe what I just said to him made some sense. Perhaps my words will lead him in the right direction and help him mature into a good friend for me, a great brother for Billy and a fantastic mate for Spencer. Now that I was done lecturing poor Colin, I had to get him out of my bed before I lose control of myself and fuck him senseless.
"Now, I'm very happy you joined me here tonight," I said. "I enjoyed your company completely. I think the best thing for you to do right now is to go back to bed before we do anything we'll regret."
"But I'm so horny right now," he whined. "Can't we just jack off together?"
"I'll be glad to do that with you some other time," I said, "but I don't think I could trust myself to keep my hands off you right now, understand?"
"I Love You Barrett Jenson," he proclaimed.
"I Love You Too Colin Gilman," I declared with equal fervor.
We kissed each other goodnight in an appropriately loving way and then Colin left the room to go back to Spencer. How I found the strength to escape that potentially damaging encounter was beyond my understanding. Colin was now gone but he left me with this raging hard-on that I was going to have to deal with if I was going to get back to sleep.
I got myself comfortable and
assumed the position. I took things
firmly in hand and started to take care of business. I fantasized about going back to
I think of myself as a pretty smart guy most of the time but I was beginning to see myself haplessly falling into all the pitfalls that I believed I knew how to avoid. Intellectually, logic is clear cut, concise and neatly wrapped, but emotionally, everything seems to be a train wreck just waiting to happen.
Alas, it was my erotic thoughts of Colin's hot body that ultimately made me cum. It was then that I came to realize that I had a serious problem. I knew I had a problem before this but I thought I could handle the situation. It's become clear that I'm going to need help. Right now, I have to get to sleep so I can return to work tomorrow and resume my mundane existence as far away from sex and my escalating relationship problems as possible.
To Be Continued ...
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Special thanks to my editors, Hans Schreiber, Flip McHooter and some "manuscript assistance" from a correspondent in Vancouver for their invaluable editing skills that helped improve this story beyond measure.