Fate Brought Billy Gilman to Me
By Paul S. Stevens
(Edited by Steve)
I drove into
My name is Barrett, and today, I was unaware that fortune was about to smile on me in a very unusual way.
This was the month of June.
I had just turned twenty-one years old in
May. I stood about five feet, ten and a
half inches. I was in pretty decent
shape. I had that kind of baby face that
made me look younger than I really was.
On this day, I was wearing a light colored short sleeved pocket T-shirt
and a drawstring pair of
It had already been a very hot month for
this time of year. In fact, we were in
the midst of a genuine heat wave. I had
lived in the
I arrived at the hotel a little after that afternoon. I parked my car under a large shady tree, and then walked over to the hotel entrance. I entered the hotel lobby and walked over to the front desk to speak with one of the many attendants there on duty.
"Welcome to The Tower Beverly Hills Hotel," she said with a smile. "How can we help you today?"
"I'm here to see Roy Dickerson," I informed her.
"Very good sir," she replied. "And whom shall I say is calling?"
"Barrett Jenson," I stated.
"One moment please," she said and proceeded to check for his registration on the computerized guest list. Once she located him, she picked up the phone and rang his room. While the line was ringing she looked over to me.
"Is it warm enough for you out there?" she sarcastically asked.
"This is the fifth day in a row of temperatures in the triple digits," I said wiping my forehead. "It's sure nice in here though."
She held up her hand slightly to indicate the line had been answered.
"Yes Mr. Dickerson," she said into the phone. "This is the front desk calling. There is a Mr. Barrett Jenson here to see you." She paused, listening to what he had to say. "Very well sir, Thank You!" She hung the phone up and wrote something on a piece of paper and then handed it to me.
It was a promotional flyer with several coupons for the various events taking place in and around the hotel that weekend. On the back side of the flyer, she had written the floor and room number to my destination.
"Mr. Dickerson is expecting you," she concluded, "eleventh floor, room 1109."
"Thank You," I replied with a smile. I turned and headed towards the elevators. I pushed the up button and waited.
A few moments later the carriage arrived and several people stepped out, leaving the compartment empty. I stepped inside, along with two others passengers. I pushed the eleventh floor button and they in turn pushed the second and fifth floor buttons. The doors closed and we began our ascent. The three of us shared our ride in complete silence. When we reached the second floor, the doors opened and the first of my traveling companions exited.
A few moments later, the doors closed again, and we resumed our journey upwards. The doors opened again on the fifth floor. My second traveling companion exited, leaving me alone to myself. The doors closed and once again, I was underway.
The elevator went up one floor and came to a stop on the sixth floor and prepared to open. None of us in our compartment had pressed the sixth floor button, so there must have been someone waiting there to get on. Whoever it was must have wanted to go up not down, or the elevator would not have stopped here.
The doors opened, and standing alone on
the sixth floor landing was the county music singing star Billy Gillman.
The first thing I noticed was his striking
features. He still had a boyish looking
face. His hair was a rich sandy blond
that was slightly spiked. He was wearing
a comfortable looking yellow tank top that had the
He flashed me a big down home country smile and entered the compartment with me. As he looked at me, I noticed his piercing hazel blue eyes that penetrated my body and catapulted me into a temporary trance. I managed to smile in return and then froze for a second. The elevator doors closed and I realized I had stopped breathing. I drew in a breath slowly as to not let him know the effect his presence had just had on me.
Billy reached up and pressed the button for the twelfth floor roof access. He then clasped his hands together in front of him. The elevator resumed its course to its next destination.
All of my senses were suddenly heightened. I could clearly hear him breathing and became acutely aware of my own heartbeat as it started pounding in my ears. I could also tell that he had just come out of the shower. A thrilling scent of freshness and a touch of sweet cologne drifted in my direction.
A mired of thoughts raced through my mind as I became a little lightheaded. Suddenly, without warning, the elevator came to an abrupt stop somewhere between the eighth and ninth floors. The lights went out leaving us in total darkness. About three seconds later, the dimly lit emergency lights came on. I'm not claustrophobic by any stretch of the imagination. However, in those brief moments, the confined space of the elevator compartment seemed to shrink to half its size.
"Oh, you've got to be kidding," Billy said looking around for an emergency phone to call for help.
"It's probably one of those rolling black-outs we were warned about this week," I said to him in a calm and soothing voice.
"Rolling black-outs? What's that?" he asked me in a panic stricken tone.
"Well, when we have a heat wave like this one, a lot of people turn on their air conditioners, causing an overload of the power grid," I said oversimplifying my explanation.
"Shamey, Shamey, Shame on Me," he said, nervously laughing at our predicament. "Once again, I forgot to pick up my cell phone on the way out of my room. Do you have one?"
"No, I mean yes," I confessed. "I have one, but I left mine out in the car. The last time we had a rolling block-out like this one, the power was out for a couple of hours. We could be here for a while."
"I told my parents I was going up to the roof to look over the city and clear my mind," Billy stated. "I think they believe I would be okay alone for a while, so I don't think anybody is going to be looking for me any time soon."
"Well, we'll just have to make the most of our situation," I told him extending my hand to introduce myself. "Hi, I'm Barrett"
"I'm Billy," he said as we shook hands acknowledging our first formal introductions.
"I know very well who you are," I
began. "You're William Wendell Gilman
III. Son of Bill II
and Fran Gilman. You were born in
"So, you're a fan then?" he asked.
"Oh no," I responded.
"I'm much more than that.
You see, we're the same age, you and I.
My birthday is
I was thankful the dull reddish glow of the emergency lights had concealed the color of my face as it must have turned a bright red as I unintentionally revealed that last part of my statement. Now that the two of us were standing face to face though, I think it was more than a simple crush, because I still felt the same way today that I did nine years ago. Like a giddy little school boy infatuated with his childhood idol.
At this point, we relinquished the fact that we were going to get rescued right away and both of us sat down on the floor of the elevator compartment and settled in for the possible long wait ahead of us.
"So, you had a crush on me," Billy continued. "That's so sweet."
"Actually, it was more than a crush," I
told him. "I used to imagine the two of
us would go places and share time together.
Go to each other's birthday parties.
"That sounds great. I never got the chance
to do any of those things as a kid," he confessed to me.
"I sort of lost out on my childhood.
My first big break happened when I was five
years old. Since then, I haven't had a
moment to myself. There are things I
want to do and ideas I want to explore, but I'm never alone long enough to be
able to do them or even make my own choices.
Being a celebrity in the public's eye, there are things that I can't do
for fear of public rejection. Some
celebrities loose their careers over such things.
Most of the time, I'm too busy to notice what
I'm missing out on, but it's days like today, I really feel it.
That's why I was on my way to the roof.
Sometimes, looking out over a big city like
"So, if you had the chance, you might have had a friend like me to do stuff like that with?"
"OH, HELL YES," Billy lamented. "Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for all the things that have happened to me since then. The things I've accomplished. The people I've met and the places I've been. Still, I feel there's something missing."
I paused for a moment to digest what Billy had just confided to me. Then I started in on my response.
"Wow," I said with surprise. "Even after having recorded all those CD's that were certified gold and then double platinum... you feel there's something missing? After having met and worked with the likes of Matthew Joseph Thaddeus Stepanek, Charlotte Church, Jerry Lewis and even Michael Jackson... you feel there's something missing? Even having been chosen National Youth Chairman of the Muscular Dystrophy Association... you still feel there's something missing? And what about all the multitudes of fans you must have... you feel there's something missing? And the girls, Oh My God, all the girls who would jump into bed with you in a flash... you still feel there's something missing? What could possibly be missing?"
As the last words came out of my mouth, Billy reached over to me and gave me a very heartfelt hug. It was a hug that reached down and tugged at the very depth of my soul. Was it simply the lack of human touch that was missing for him? Was it that he found himself un-loved or is it that he just hasn't found the right person that completes him and brings meaning to his life?
As I contemplated the possible meaning that Billy was trying to convey to me, he released his hug. He put his hands on both of my shoulders, held me there for a few seconds and gave me the most loving kiss I had ever known! I was surprised by Billy's actions, but not unyielding. I felt my cock twitch and start to swell up in my trunks. A long time fantasy was swiftly becoming a reality. Before I knew it, Billy had parted my lips and ever so sweetly offered me his warm heavenly tongue. I quickly found myself in the middle of a sensual oral ballet, gently and tenderly exploring each other in a way I had never experienced before.
I was suddenly struck by an epiphany. What in the hell was I doing? Did I lead Billy on somehow? Was I making him do something he would never have done ordinarily? Was I taking advantage of him in this vulnerable state he was in?
Wait a minute! It was Billy who hugged me. It was Billy who kissed me. It was he who offered his oral probe for my approval. And boy did I approve! The atmosphere in this elevator had just turned very steamy. The dim reddish glow of the emergency lighting turned into an erotic setting that fueled the oncoming rise of passion. I felt my ears get hot and my pulse rate quicken. I had long dreamed about such an encounter with my long standing boyhood crush, Billy Gilman.
I wanted to continue our make-out session for as long as he was willing, and let HIM decide when he was ready to stop or possibly move on to something else.
What Billy needed to do next was continue our discussion as he began to feel more at ease with me. He now understood that I was ready and willing to listen to him and was genuinely interested in whatever he had to say. I must have instilled a sense of trust in him as he confided even more of himself to me and began to pour his heart out.
"I think I'm starting to loose it," Billy admitted. His eyes began to well up as he held back the tears.
"What do you mean, `loose it'?" I asked with deep concern.
"People don't seem to want the grown up twenty-one year old Billy Gilman any more," he said to me with a noticeably shaken voice. "I just can't give them what they want anymore."
"People don't know what they want Billy!" I firmly said. "Right now, you're in a transitional period. All that means is that you have to put yourself back on the map with something big to make people notice the twenty-one year old Billy Gilman who has even more to offer now than ever before! It just hasn't happened yet and it won't happen if you start second guessing yourself or start thinking about giving up! And now that you ARE twenty-one, it's time to think about striking out on your own and make your life what you want to make of it. Make your own decisions and control your own destiny.
"Wow! Talking to you turned out to be much better for me than going up on the roof and starring out at the city," Billy said acknowledging my advice.
"I'm sorry, I have no business telling you what to do," I said to Billy apologizing for my forward way of saying what's on my mind.
"No," he said stopping me from continuing. "I needed to hear it from somebody, and nobody in my organization was ever going to say those things to me in fear of loosing their jobs."
I was beginning to see what Billy was talking about in the lyrics of his newest song `Billy the Kid'. In this song, the lyrics state: "The papers say I'm dead, but I'm not buried yet, cause I've still got bullets left." These lyrics further attest to the fact that he is now a force to be reckoned with. However, cryptically stating these facts in a song wasn't enough. Everybody was still holding on to the image of that cute little thirteen year old singer from 2001 that starred in that wholesome down country song and music video `One Voice'. Not me however, I was seeing that attractive young man in front of me who was growing into a hot, sexy, twink that was more desirable to me than the most sought after celebrity.
I was also beginning to understand what Billy meant when he said there was something missing. He had been leading a very public life, and at the very same time was overly protected and was sheltered from the people around him. Aside from his sleepless bed being the only time and place he could find himself alone, he was either surrounded by teachers or his parents or his entourage. The rest of the time, he was singing in recording sessions or filming music videos. Then squeezing out any free time he might have had, he would be found touring the small town concert halls for the last die hard fans who just wanted to here that one song they associated him with. There was no room for him to experiment on his own, nor was he allowed to fully explore his sexuality. Sure, he had his choice of many female groupies and girlfriends but he wasn't finding satisfaction from these encounters. His search for sexual self expression and personal discovery was long overdue. I also understood what he meant when he said his career could come to an end, as he couldn't really let anyone know what it was he secretly desired.
As for me, I was in the right place at the right time. I felt blessed that I would be the one who allowed him this once in a lifetime opportunity to finally get a taste of what it was he had been longing for. Even though the both of us were twenty-one years old now, what I was experiencing from Billy felt more like a young boy exploring new sensations with a long time pal in the darkness of a closed garage, with all the newness and playfulness of a novice.
I was grateful that fate had thrown the two of us together like it had. As we grew closer to each other minute by minute, the little boyhood crush I had been holding on to for all these years was maturing into something much more. I was falling head over heels in love with him, right here, right now!
Billy reached over to me and kissed me again as we began our second make-out session. To my surprise, he reached down to touch my cock through the fabric of my trunks. To his surprise he discovered the raging hard-on that was pulsating underneath. He released the lip lock he had been holding on me and reached around, just under the waistband of my trunks and found the drawstring holding them closed and untied them to allow his hand to slip in. My body shuttered as his fingers touched the head of my cock. He discovered a small accumulation of pre-cum that had formed at the tip of my dick. He collected it between his thumb and forefinger and brought the small sample to his lips.
"Yum yum, that tastes so good," he said licking his fingers. "It tastes like more."
"Well, there's a lot more where that came from," I told him inviting him to help himself.
I couldn't believe that things had progressed this far, but I was enjoying every second of it. I found myself wishing it would never end. Billy accepted my unspoken invitation and pulled my trunks down past my knees and laid me down on the cool tiled floor. At this point, there was little left of me that hadn't been revealed to my hero. My cock was harder now than I can remember it ever being. The sensitivity of every nerve ending in my body was supercharged. The anticipation of what Billy was about to do next, sent my imagination into overdrive.
"You do have a beautiful body Barrett," he told me while visually checking me over. "And what a delicious looking cock too."
Here I was, alone with Billy Gilman.
I'm stuck in an elevator somewhere between
floors in one of the most illustrious hotels in
My mind drew a blank as I struggled to think of an appropriate response. Before I could formulate my answer, he initiated his next move. He bent down over me and ever so gently drew my rigid rock hard cock into his mouth and played a game of tonsil tennis with it. Once again he took the lead, and I followed it. I wiggled over to position myself between his knees, and assumed a sixty-nine position under him. I slowly reached up and pulled his shorts down to the floor. Underneath his shorts, he was wearing a pair of wholesome white cotton Fruit-Of-The-Loom briefs. Now I could clearly see the outline of his considerably stiff package. I reached up again and felt his cock through the thin barrier between us. He gasped as my initial touch had sent a shutter through his body. It felt so good to finally touch the object of so many of my own personal fantasies and in a few moments, I was about to see the real thing in living color. The only thing left to do now was eliminate the last obstacle standing between us. I pulled down his briefs to the floor and released Billy's confined contents.
"Oh My God," I blurted out unintentionally. "It's more beautiful than I imagined."
The Lord sure did bless this boy. Billy had a perfectly proportioned and superbly circumcised penis that looked to be at least seven inches in length. He had a small patch of sandy blond pubic hair that was neatly trimmed and cropped. His balls hung low and were meticulously shaved giving them the appearance of having baby soft skin. So, that's where I decided to begin.
I drew Billy's ball sack into my mouth and discovered I was right. The skin was warm and soft and inviting. His perfectly proportioned orbs were the ideal mouthful. The lingering fresh scent of his recent shower was quite pleasing and memorable. But, at the same time, I detected a faint hint of Billy's maturing manhood and found that to be overwhelmingly intoxicating.
I reached up to stroke Billy's cock. It was visibly pulsating from the lack of attention it had been enduring. We both started to moan from the rising pleasure that our mutual attentions were providing. I started to feel the far distant swell of an oncoming orgasm begin to approach and I turned my attention on getting him to orgasm with me. I reluctantly released his balls and now focused on his throbbing cock.
What a wonderful mouthful it was. The stroking I had been doing to Billy's cock so far had started his sweet tasting pre-cum juices to flowing. As I looked up past his balls, I came to notice his fairly tight bubble butt that prominently called out to me. As I continued to suck on his member, I wet my finger and slowly massaged the outer ring of his anal orifice. When I felt he was ready, I pushed my finger past the guard and entered into that forbidden zone. Billy took in a deep breath in response to this, and his cock twitched in my mouth. As long as he wasn't verbally complaining, I continued on and slowly added another finger, and then another. Each time his cock twitched, his anal muscles squeezed my fingers. His breathing became more and more shallow.
To my surprise, I felt Billy's finger probe my backside. He was beginning to acknowledge the enjoyment I had given him by reciprocating the favor. He also experienced the same reactions from me when my cock twitched for him. My breathing grew heavy. I instinctively knew that both of us were barreling headlong toward our greatly anticipated mutual orgasm. Billy's hips began instinctively gyrating as his approaching climax began to overtake him.
Several tell-tale signs of Billy's orgasm manifested themselves. His cock swelled up in my mouth and his sphincter muscles bore down, clamping my fingers still. I took this last opportunity to reach for his prostate button and stoked it like Aladdin's lamp, summoning the genie within.
That was the last holdout Billy was able to endure as nine forceful volleys of creamy man milk assaulted my throat. He emptied his sperm-heavy balls into me like the sea mercilessly pounds the shore in an approaching storm. I was able to manipulate his ejections of semen by applying precise pressure on his prostate, thereby controlling each spasm. I did this to intentionally slow the speed of his contractions to afford him the slowest, longest lasting, most intense orgasm of his life.
I knew I was in control of Billy's orgasm. Giving him the most powerful climax possible had made me so hot that I shot my load before he was finished with his. I didn't have a chance to warn him of my impending blast off. On the other hand, he didn't warn me of his either. I was still shooting the last of my load into Billy's mouth as I sucked the last few remaining drops of his softening tool. When he was finished sucking the last seeds from my dick, he collapsed on top of me in a warm embrace. The feel of his body resting on top of mine gave me the sensation of being loved and cared for. A feeling I was enjoying just as much as the sex we had just shared.
Once we had recovered from our euphoric experience and rejoined the land of the living, we both began demonstrating our appreciation for what we had just done for each other. Once again he kissed me with all the love and tenderness that could possibly be wrapped up in a single kiss. I could feel his sincerity reach down into my soul and communicate his feelings to me in a way that words could never accomplish.
Eventually, we gathered ourselves together. We pulled our shorts back up and sat up, leaning ourselves against the wall as we had done earlier. I'm glad we ended up swallowing each other's prize. There wasn't any mess to have to deal with now and no one would be the wiser as to what may or may not have transpired between us during the time we had been confined together.
As all of these thoughts were racing through my head, Billy had one more surprise for me. He began to sing. I had read somewhere that Billy tends to sing all the time, for any reason. This time, he wasn't singing just to sing, he was singing to me personally. He began to sing a song a-cappella style for me called:
"I'm Not Me Anymore"
Is this my bed?
What's going on in my head?
I feel so different today
I have this image of you
My freedom, my courage, the strength I never knew
I found the answer through you
Discover the glory of living through you
You taught me so much
Your words lift me up
I'm not me anymore
I'm all of us and a part of you
I'm not me anymore
I am here for you
With every beat of my heart
I come closer to you
I have this vision of you
My kindness, my faith I attribute to you
I share my secrets with you
You taught me forgiveness with all that you do
To have someone to trust
Can change you so much
And I'm not me anymore
I'm all of us and a part of you
I'm not me anymore
Well I am here for you
With every beat of my heart
I come closer to you
Closer than I've ever been
To knowing your love never ends
And even when my heart is aching
Knowing that you'll take me in and love me again
I'm not me anymore
I'm all of us and a part of you
I'm not me anymore
Well I am here for you
With every beat of my heart
I come closer to you
Oh boy, were we in trouble. I began to realize that both of us had deeply fallen for each other in a timelessly tragic way. This was going to prove to be very difficult for both of us. To start with, we didn't even live in the same state. We had vastly different lives, and long distance relationships rarely work out for long. Even so, I'd fallen so hard for him that I was starting to think anything could be possible. Clearly, I was in a fog. My mind was wandering from one thought to the next and I suddenly realized I was seriously compromised, yet I still held out for an optimistic outcome.
"Oh my God Billy," I told him as I fought back the tears that welled up in my own eyes. "That was unbelievable"
"The next time we get together, I want you to make love to me," he whispered as he looked straight into my eyes. Then a small grin started to grow on his face as he continued. "Even if it means paying someone to knock the electricity out next time we're in an elevator."
"I can't wait," I told him with a smile. Even though I knew that fantasy had a slim chance of ever coming to pass, it gave me hope to know our relationship had a chance of continuing beyond this isolated incident.
The lyrics to Billy's song really hit home for me as it seemed to pertain to the new relationship we had just forged. It spoke of Billy being changed by experiencing that one thing he found to be missing in his life, that one thing that a miraculous series of events would allow him to fulfill. The one thing I had been instrumental in making a reality. It also spoke of my encouraging words lifting him up. Sharing secrets and building trust. And finally, it spoke of both of us growing closer to one another with each beat of our hearts. No words of any song I've ever heard in my life, ever personally moved me in this way. Billy knew exactly what he was doing by choosing that song to sing to me.
We gave each other another hug and kiss. Suddenly the emergency lights went out and the regular lights came back on. A few moments later the elevator began to move again. Billy and I got up off the floor and stood waiting to see what would happen next. The elevator traveled up a half a floor stopping at the ninth floor.
"How can I get in touch with you?" I quickly asked him, praying that I wasn't too late in asking what I should have asked much sooner.
Before he could answer, the doors opened and there at the landing stood a hoard of people waiting to give Billy a helping hand. Among the many people waiting there was a handful of guests waiting to go downstairs, the Hotel Security Staff and Billy's family, who whisked him out of the compartment leaving me there as if I were invisible. The noise and confusion caught me off guard and suddenly the elevator doors closed. Everything went from panic and mayhem to dead silence. I didn't even have any elevator music to keep me company. The silence was deafening as I started to feel faint and light headed. The elevator continued its journey to the eleventh floor, and the doors opened. I instinctively stepped out of the compartment and the doors closed behind me. I was in a daze. For a few minutes I didn't know where I was or what I was doing. I wondered aimlessly down the halls wondering how I was going to go on from here in light of what had just transpired. Just then a man came out of room 1109 and spoke to me.
"Hey Barrett, I was just coming down to find you," he said to me. "What took you so long? Did you get stuck in an elevator or something?"
It took me a few seconds to realize, it was my friend Roy. The guy I had come to visit. I could hardly speak. All I could do was shake my head yes as I stared at him.
"Come on in," he said. "Tell me all about it."
"What's the matter," he asked looking perplexed. "What happened in that elevator? You look like you lost your best friend."
"It's much worse than that," I confessed. "I think I found and lost true love, all at the same time."
"What the hell are you talking about?" he asked in a state of confusion. "You fell in love in the fucking elevator? Man! She must have been a real knockout."
"We were stuck, alone together during that power outage for almost an hour," I told him, trying to defend myself.
"So, what's her name... this person who stole your heart?" he prodded.
"It was... It was..."
I hesitated to answer.
I had just realized I was about to divulge
personal and intimate information about myself that I don't easily talk about with
just anybody. I also had Billy's trust
"It was Billy Gilman all right!" I blurted out as fast as I could.
"Oh shit, Billy Gilman!"
"Oh, no you didn't," I said raising my voice. "You take that back you son of a bitch or I'll kick your ass!"
"Okay, okay, calm down, I was just playing with you," he said apologizing. "Shit, you really are in love!"
"This isn't a fucking joke," I said trying to calm myself down. "I fell for him hard, and I'm positive he fell for me too. We got separated before we got the chance to exchange any information. He definitely won't be able to find me. He doesn't know my last name or even who I came here to visit.
"You two were stuck together for more than an hour, and you didn't even swap info with each other?" he said in disbelief. "What the hell were you doing all that time?"
"We had other things on our minds," I responded.
"I'll bet you did."
"I don't know what to do now," I told him as a flood of tears began rolling down my face. My heart sank and I started to feel myself plunge headlong into a pit of despair.
"Don't worry," he told me with confidence,
"I see Billy and his family all the time in
"No shit? You really could do that?" I asked as I began to feel there was hope again. "Thanks. This really means a lot to me. Really, thank you!"
"No pro-blem-o," he told me as he got up and walked away from me to use bathroom. "To think my little Barrett is falling in love with Billy Gilman of all people. Jesus, what's the world coming to anyway?"
To Be Continued ...
Can fate smile a second time on Billy and Barrett as they struggle to find each other again?
Was Billy's request to have Barrett make love to him spoken from the heart or just a casual remark?
Can Billy break free from the controlling influences that have been preventing his personal growth and happiness?
Will Billy's new sexual discovery cause him to have a life changing revelation?
What does the future hold for Billy and Barrett?
To find the answers to these questions and more, watch for more of the continuing story of:
"How Fate Brought Billy Gilman to Me"
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