Author's Note:

One Direction are a British boy band who was formed a year ago on the X Factor. They finished third. The band's members are Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik and Louis Tomlinson. This is a fanfiction and I suggest you try finding out more about the guys if you don't know who they are, before reading this. Also, this is a fictional story that does not intend to say anything about the characters' sexuality and private lives in reality. Please keep in mind that English is not my first language. I wish to keep all rights on this story. If you want to reproduce any part of it, you must contact me for permission. Please, do understand that I put a lot of effort in this. For any comments and suggestions:


Thank you!




Okay. Ten more. One. ... Two. ... Three...

I hate push ups. I try to do the bare minimum of them required to keep myself in shape. I think it's something with the way I regulate my breathing (or the way I don't), I just can't get it right and it becomes real hard for me.

Okay. Okay. I'm done. Whew!

I got up and stretched my arms a bit. Good. I need to hurry up a bit though, the lads are almost dressed. And damn do they all look amazing.

It's the last show of the tour tonight. Well, it wasn't really a tour, we came to the US to shoot the video and did a few concerts and signings in the Cali area. We're in San Francisco today. Last show, biggest audience (we didn't do a show in LA). A signing tomorrrow and then heading home. We have a month of doing nothing ahead of us, except for a few interviews, bit that's all. Don't get me wrong, I love what we do, I love being up on stage, traveling around the world, meeting fans and shit...but sometimes it's just a little too much. We need a break, a little time for ourselves and for friends/girlfriends back home.

I pulled up my slacks but left them unbottoned. Next I put on the button up shirt that was probably whiter the untouched snow up in the Himalayas. Oh, look, my package looks particularly good today, it's quite well outlined. It must be the boxers. I shall wear this pair more often, yes. 

"Liam! Come on, we got ten minutes!" that was Louis, in wifey voice.

"Almost ready, darling!" 

Niall let out a cute laugh from my right and I turned to him smiling. Oh.

Oh wow.

Oh wow! 


Really, I have no words to describe how brilliantly beautiful Niall looked in his suit and what I felt the moment I noticed that. My breath literally caught in my throat. My heart skipped a few beats, my world stopped for a long moment. I never thought an experience like this was possible - time actually slowed down to nothing, in my mind at least.

Next thing you know, my eyes avert themselves, I'm looking around for my jacket, gulping, blinking rapidly, biting down hard on my lower lip. 

I put on my jacket and slowly turned. I tried to make it a swift movement, to gyrate on the heels of my untied shows, but I couldn't, I did it in a shaky manner, small steps. Shit. He's so, so beautiful. Never in my life have I seen anyone this dazzlingly handsome. But he's not mine. I can't tell him how wonderful he looks, how manly. I can't sneak my hands inside his jacket, feel his chest, cup his cheek, feel the soft strength in his body, burry my fingers in his hair. 


"Yea, yea, I just need to tie my shoes. You guys can go if you want, I'll be right with you."

"I'll wait for you." Niall said, checking himself out in the mirror, fixing his perfect hair. For a second there I allowed myself to interpret this as something meaningful, but then my heart shrunk to the size of a peanut again. 

"Thanks, bro." 

I sighed deeply. I shoudln't have let this go this far. I wasn't to blame entirely, of course, still...I can't let this ruin everything. Niall is my best friend, my little bro. He is insanely sexy too, and I'm gonna enjoy that. Yes.

Under this freeing feeling I had just made up myself I got up with a smile and stood next to my boy in front of the mirror. 

"I think we look fabulous." he said matter-of-factly in an exaggerated even for him accent. 

I smiled sweetly and shoved him playfully.

"Indeed we do, indeed we do."

He fumbled around with his jacket.

"Oh!" I made a few quick jumps to my bag, "Almost forgot this." 

I took out a handkerchief in a soft yellow, folded it neatly and placed it inside my jacket's pocket. I observed myself in the mirror. Hopefully Niall notices how good I look. I do look good, right?

"Aw dude, should have gotten one of those for myself. Got another one?" I looked around the room. "A white one, cause it will look-"

"Yea, yea, I think I have another one. Wait. Yes. Here it is. There. Now you're just as stylish as I am." 

Most certainly it's gonna be all over Tumblr tomorrow, `Niam with handkerchiefs'. 

"Oh yeah. We gonna have a jolly good time!"

Out the dressing room and ahead towards the stage. The guys were waiting for us just round the corner. You could feel they were nervous as well, it's always like that before a show, but in the end it's okay because we're all in it together, you know?

Niall buttoned his jacket and jammed his hands into his pants' pockets. He turned up his swag. He put on an arrogant smirk. Louis picked up on it immediately. 

"Mr. Horan! So glad to see you!" He shouted and they shook hands. 

"Mr. Payne." He then shook hands with me.

"Mr. Malik."

"Mr. Tomlinson."

"Mr. Styles."

"Mr. Horan."

"Mr. Styles."

"Mr. Tomlinson."

"Mr. Horan."

"Mr. Malik."

"Mr. Payne."

We all shook hands in a very serious and business like manner. I finally got to hold Niall's hand, barely able to contain my grin. We stood round in a circle snickering.  Niall was on my right and Harry on my left and I just couldn't NOT pull them into a group hug. 

The tension was gone now. All was good. I could just feel tranquility settling within my chest, lazily flowing to my limbs.

We are five guys, five best friends. We have the best fans ever, even if they always scream a little too much. Five boys in gorgeous clothes, about to give thei best on stage. So lucky. 

Oh, right, let me tell you about the suits. We were all wearing the same - perfectly black formal shoes, slacks and a solid metal belt buckle, standing proud and holding a white button up shirt tucked inside, and, finally, a jacket of the same color as the slacks. Each of us had his suit in a different color, something they had chosen for us, a San Francisco show was something very special after all. If you ask me, the colors were chosen with great accuracy, they matched our looks and personalitites. 

Lou was wearing a mix of brown and orange, a very specific and unique color actually. It was just dark enough to light up in a right way when hit by the projectors, and just light enough to give off a mysterious sexiness when in shadows. He moved a lot and smiled even more. Delightful.

Zayn's suit was a dark shamrock green, and it was as if it charged the air around him with sexual tension, it clung inzaynely good to his figure. He sung, he danced, he moved with great confidence, he radiated masculinity, and he didn't smile too much. He was a man in that suit. For the first time I pondered the idea of getting in bed with him and doing things to him in this very suit. Enchanting. 

The team had chosen an extravaggant sky blue for Harry. His hair was the usual tidy mess and he showed off his dimples every chance he got. He was truly cute, the way he swirled and teased the fans, the way he shaked his curls. Harry was probably the one that stood out the most of all of us, but he didn't take advantage of it and let us each have our spotlight moments. Glorious. 

My color was violet/purple. Now, I don't want to sound narcisistic or anything, but I thought I look pretty damn awesome. My hair was not too long or too short, held in place by just the enough amount of chemicals, the final touch of the handkerchief in my pocket. Boy, I was smokin. Exquisite.

My boy? My perfect leprechaun? Oh, he was in dark blue. Oh, he was hot beyond belief. Yes, yes. Bloody fantastic! The dark color of the suit made his pale complexion stand out the same way his dark shirt did the other day at the amusement park. And you have no idea what that did to my poor confused heart. Hormones raced to my groin and warmth flooded my chest. The crowd exploded when they saw how fucking wonderful he looked (since we didn't get on stage together, but were instead kept in the shadows and hit by the projectors one by one). No one can hold a candle to my blonde. With his sexily ruffled hair, invitingly opened shirt (just the first two buttons, okay, he isn't a slut) and intoxicating voice. With his adorable little smiles, eyebrow lifts and spins. And his accent, of course. Mix it all together and you know you got the best of both worlds. Of all worlds, should I say. Niall Horan. Marvelous. Stunning. Flawless. 

Not mine. 

I made sure to throw as many furtive glances at his as possible while we were singing the chorus of `What Makes You Beautiful'. My little Tumblr adventure has taught me a lot of things and one of them is that every photo of any two guys in the band together can be seen as having a gay side to it. Niam, Niam, Niam. I can't wait to see these tomorrow. 

Let me have my dreams, okay? 

Oh, also, my handkerchief helped in another way too, aside from making me incredibly elegant and hot. It kind of absorbed the fluid my heart turned into when it melted. When did it melt? When Niall finished our show with his solo in `Another World', of course. So afterwards I could squeeze it out and back into my chest. 

The club wasn't too big, but it wasn't small either. There were a lot of people, so we left two members of the security outside, just in case something turns up. Louis knew the owner of the place, so we had no trouble with fans or anything (I actually don't know how he did it). We had a good table on the second floor which wasn't exactly a story on its own since the dancefloor was downstairs. We all left our jackets there, we hadn't bothered to change. I couldn't help but notice how me and Zayn's muscles bulged under our shirts with every movement. Man, we mad hot.

I was happy. The show went extremely well. I was pumped. I was having fun tonight. Harry and Louis had to kind of hold back a little since they had girls back home, but me, Zayn and Niall were free to go crazy. And that's what we all planned on doing. I went to the bar to get myself a drink (no problems with that either, it's good to be famous) and saw that Zayn was already making out with some chick and Niall enjoying himself dancing with a girl. Jealousy stabbed at my heart, but my shields rose and kept it out. Kind of. I was going to have fun. Who knows what could happen, right? My crush on Niall is something entirely different. Yes. 

I busied myself on the floor, several girls came over, we danced, spoke over the music and got confused answers, laughed and drank. I was actually enjoying this very much, all troubles forgotten. I excused myself to go get drinks and turned just in time to see it happen. 

There was this guy there, about our age. He was skinny and would've been cute in the face if it wasn't for the arrogance in his eyes. He didn't look tough or anything, but the moment you saw him you knew he was trouble. 

Apparently Niall had bumped into him and spilled his drink. As I neared I could see that my boy was apologizing and, I suppose, offering to get him another one. The kid though decided it was best to show what kind of a spoiled prick he is and hit him. 

He hit him. 

He hit Niall.

He hit my love.

Something just snapped, you know?

Niall stumbled backwards in shock. A thin string of blood flew out of his left nostril. His eyes fluttered, his hands went to his face. A flow of blood poured out of his nose. 

The kid wasn't satisfied. His dominance encouraged him to do more. I literally felt the blow on my body as he delievered a blow to Niall's gut, sending him doubled over on the floor where seconds ago people were standing, observing. No one caught Niall. He lay on the ground for what seemed like hours, but were probably fractions of a second. 

I saw no more. My body went numb, blood roared in my ears, the world became a blur. I wanted to plunder, to strangle him. To mindlessly grind his head into a bloody chaisaw. 

I shoved Louis off of him, took him by the collar of his shirt and smashed his nose. The crack echoed in my ears and if it was a different situation I definitely would have cringed myself. It was his turn to hold his face. I gave him a second to recover and then crushed his internal organs with my knee. 

You like how it feels, bro? 

I didn't let him fall to the groud. I shouted at him to stand up and fight, and he did. Zayn was by my side then. He slammed the guy onto the bar, but I shoved him away. I stood the kid up. He didn't even get a chance to swing at me. I was blind with rage, the image of Niall hunched up on the floor in pain burning in my mind. I gathered all the strength in my body and pummeled.


 I have no idea where exactly the strike landed, but the bastard was on the ground and I didn't care anymore. 

My boy. 

Suddenly any trace of rage left my body. I rushed to my blonde who had sat up and was leaning his back on the bar. Harry and Louis were by his side, trying to get his nose to stop bleeding. I kneeled next to him and carefully embraced his fragile frame.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly. I'm sure it showed on my face exactly how crazy worried I was. 

Niall smiled a little.

"Of course I'm okay, it was nothing. Look, even the bleeding stopped." he tried a reassuring smile, but I didn't buy it.

"I'm sorry." I started shaking my head.

He seemed genuinely confused.

"For what?"

"Well...for this, I should have been looking out for you! Like we all do. But I was-"

"That's nonsense, come on, bro, you can't be thinking that." he smiled and put his hand on my shoulder, "I'm not a little boy, I can look after myself, and besides, nothing happened, I'm fine."

I suddenly became aware of the ain in my hand. My knuckles were pretty badly bruised, I must have caught them on a tooth or something. Niall noticed too and grimaced.

People were staring at us, Harry and Lou were nowhere to be seen. The music had stopped, the sound of a siren clear over the one of people talking. To me it seemed that hours had passed, but it couldn't have been more than a minute or two.

I was just getting up to look for the others when Zayn appeared out of nowhere. He kneeled next to me. 

"Dude, you knocked him out!" he hissed, clearly worried.

"I did?" I..what? Oh god...

"Yes! Cops are coming..." he looked around. 

Okay. Okay, what?! Ohh no, no, no..

"For him, right?" sayyessayyes

Zayn shook his head. He bit on his lower lip.

"Shit." that was Niall, a triubled expression on his face. 

"Stay with him, I'll find Harry and Louis." 

"They're with the kid, trying to get him to wake up or whatever."

Shit. Just..Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. This is so fucked up, I'm screwed. Where the hell are the security guys? Oh, there they are. This is gonna be everywhere tomorrow. Shit, shit, shit, the management's probably already heard about it...

I put my hand on Harry's shoulder and cops and security rushed through the crowd. I raised my hands in the air, a cold wave swarmed over my body. This is happening. Hands were all over me, within seconds mine were cuffed behind my back. 

"Take him to the hospital, to get checked, okay?" I said calmly. 

My mind tried to race, but only tossed back an forth between numbness and panic. Could they charge me? I was only defending Niall? The management's going to kill me? Will they kick me out of the band? Is it possible? I knocked him out? Am I going to jail now? What if I did permanent damage? It's not possible, right? Can someone bail me out? Are they arresting him too? We're going to have to do an official statement about this? What if I do go to jail? He started it? 

I was left standing crushed next to the police car while one of the cops was fumbling with a bunch of papers in the front seat. The other one was still inside. I guessed they were trying to get a clean story. The lads will back me up. I looked away from the entrance of the club. It was a beautiful night, clear, warm, not very loud. A forlorn cloud floated above my head. One moment it was a dragon, next it was an eye. Cold metal bit into my wrists.

Another police car arrived, this one without it's sirens on. Someone walked up behind me. I stepped away from the door, assuming it was the other cop who was gonna open the door for me. Instead, I saw Zayn. His hands were behind his back too. My eyes widened. What..

"Why is he cuffed too? He didn't do anything! Let him go, he didn't do anything!"

No chance of getting my hands out of the handcuffs. 

"Chill, kid" started the cop, a man with an ugly face of about 40, while opening the door, "We got information he threw some punches too. Come on."

Zayn didn't move and neither did I. 

"WeI was only defending my friend, that other kid started it, aren't you going to-" yes, they are. 

The bloody face of the fucker who dared to touch my boy emerged from the entrance of the club, a cop supporting him from behind. He was cuffed too. He appeared quite dizzy. He stumbled and would have fallen if the cop hadn't caught him. 

"Come on, kid" Zayn was already getting in the car. "We'll get the story straight, but for now you're going to jail. You knocked him out."

The door slammed after me. Zayn was looking at his feet. I realized I was trembling. The cuffs clawed at my skin again. 

I rubbed my wrists, glad to be able to stretch my arms. I carefully sat down on the bench next to Zayn. The cell wasn't too big, a regular police station prison cell. It was cold, it smelled like urine and vomit. The floor was dirty with things I don't even want to know the origin of. A metal toilet bowl stood to the far wall. How did we get here? I felt dirty, as if we had been caught selling cocaine or shoplifting. 

I shiften uneasily. 

"You're beating yourself up over it, don't. It wasn't your fault."

"I didn't even do anything wrong! I just..I don't know what happened, but I just had to defend Niall and it just snapped and I couldn't stop myself..!"

"I understand. It's okay."

I stared at him, calmly picking at his thumb's nail. 

"We're in jail, do you see that? I beat up a guy and sent him to the ground unconscious. Niall got beaten up. He got beaten up, fo Christ's sake, we're in jail!" 

"Stop shouting, I know, I'm not blaming you!" he barely raised his voice, but I shut up. "And Niall didn't get beaten up, he took a punch to the face! Stop overreacting, okay. It's okay, they can't even charge us for this, you were defending him. Stop panicking." 

I blinked. I realized he was actually right. Yes. I was panicking. Of course they can't charge us. 

Zayn laughed.

"I can't believe you are the one that's thinking irrational." 

Yeah, Liam, what the hell are you doing. 

It's true though. I thought about it, I saw it - Niall was okay. I had snapped because...well, because he was my little Irish blonde and my bestest friend. 

"What about the management?" 

Zayn winced. Yeah, that's how I'm feeling too, bro. 

"I don't know, man...I'm really hoping they will be understanding. But the problem with the media remains, the whole thing is probably gonna get blown out of proportion by tomorrow evening and then..." he shook his head. 

"We'll figure something out."


"You know why I actually did it, right?" 

Zayn laughed sexily again. 

"I know. I would have done the same." he smiled, "And I did try, actually, but Mr. Superman here does his business alone. Did you notice how no one even dared trying to get you off the kid?"

He laughed and I laughed along. The burden and the fear were gone in an exhale. I had overreacted and this was stupid. And we'll be okay, and how could I think I was gonna get kicked out of the band? Funny shit...

"The guys are probably going to pay the..the bail soon." Zayn unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt and leaned back. 

I sucked on my bruised knuckles. My shirt had a few crimson stains from when I had hugged Niall. Well that's a bummer. Probably won't come out. 

"Hey have you thought about telling them that you're..that, you like guys?" his voice faltered a little and a blush spread over my cheeks.

"Well...I really don't know. I guess I should, but I'm not too sure if, if I'm really bi yet. Maybe it's just for Niall." I cleared my throat, "Have you?"

Zayn replied with silence and I looked over to see than he was chewing on his lip thoughtfully. 

"I suppose I should too. I mean, I'm pretty sure that guys, in general. Even if it's just sexual. Which I'm not too sure about."

I nodded.

"Well, no rush, you know? don't feel ready, if you don't feel like doing's alright."

"You are pretty hot in that suit though. I wouldn't mind taking it off for you." I stated matter-of-factly. Zayn laughed again and slapped my arm.

The room wasn't big, but it was cozy. Two single beds with covers in happy colors. The walls were painted in a soft yellow. The floor was covered by a thick carpet, everywhere. The small balcony looked out on the ocean. Well, not exactly, but roughly speaking it did. But those are all details I noticed the next morning. 

Niall placed his suitcases next to the bed that was closer to the balcony and started rummaging through it, quickly getting ready for sleep. I did the same, but took a minute to place a few shirts on the hangers in the wardrobes. My cosmetics took their place on the little tablenext to Niall's suitcase. 

We raced to the bathroom and fought for the privilege of getting to pee first. I laughed my ass off, everything was back to normal. Not that it ever was...I mean, yeah. Guess who won?

"Hurry up, brooo!" I called out while pacing in a small circle in front of the door. Just hearing him pissing created the possibility of accidentaly letting a stream trickle down my loose boxers' leg. "What are you doing, playing with yourself?" 

Niall laughed and flushed the toilet. Oh, look now I'm getting hard thinking about him grasping his tool...Hey, remember when I got arrested? Yeah. 

The bathroom door opened and my blonde stepped out. He held out his hands smiling devilishly as if to touch me, but I stepped back (more of an automatic gesture, if you must know, I actually don't really mind...).

"Wash your hands, fool, I'm going in." 

Peeing with the guy I'm sorta in love with washing his hands right there behind you wasn't hard. I mean, since that guy is my best friend who has seen my ding-a-ling a lot of times, before and after I became aware of my feelings for him. 

I threw myself down on my bed and pulled the covers up. I'm gonna take a shower tomorrow, yes, we will have plenty of time before the signing. Niall Came out of the bathroom with a glass in his hand. That boy.

"No water on the nightstand, mate!" 

He laughed.

"What, didn't you like listening to me talking in my sleep from up close?"

"Please! You know very well you don't talk in your sleep, you sleep like bear on Christmas."

My cute boy went into a fit of the cutest laughter and I laughed along. The actual reason, as you can probably figure out for yourselves, was that I didn't want any boner accidents. I know he's going to be okay with it, but I will feel pretty bad. It's happened before, true, for both of us, but now it's different. 

He plopped down on his bed with a heavy sigh. For the first time I allowed myself to stare at the purple circle with uneven edges on his belly for more than a few seconds, and I couldn't help but wince.

"What did the doctors say?" I asked seriously. 

He busied himself with his covers. 

"They said everything's fine, my nose is okay, save for a little clogging but they cleaned that out. I have no damage of theinternal organs whatsoever either. I'm okay." he smiled distractedly at me. 

"What about the...the bruise?"

"Well, they gave me this medicine, it's like creme. And I have to spread a bit of it on the spot three times a day or so." 

"Well did you?"

Niall fluffed up his pillow.

"No, it's still too sore, I don't want to touch it."

"But you have to! So it heals!"

He didn't say anything. I jumped up from my bed. 

"I'll do it for you, where is the medicine?"

"No, Liam, come on, drop it." he pleaded, "I'll start doing it tomorrow morning, I just don't want to touch it now, it hurts too much."

I was already going through his luggage, his cosmetics in particular. I'm not letting my boy go around like this, and as far as I know him, he won't start doing what the doctors told him tomorrow either.

"It's not there." he mumbled.

"Where is it then?"

He gave me a pleading look once again and I almost gave in. 

"I'll be careful."

He sighed.

"It's in my jacket's pocket."

"The one you wore at the show or the other one?"

"The other one." he said, sounding defeated. 

I held the small green box in my hands and examined it while making my way to his bed. 

"Is it like a...balm or something?"

"I guess." 

"I'll be careful, I promise. It won't heal if you don't do what the doctors said." we both knew it would heal on its own, but Niall didn't object. 

I gently pulled the covers down to his knees. I vowed to be as gentle as possible. I couldn't stand causing my little leprechaun pain. 
His slender body was beautiful as always. For a moment I was even worried I'd pop a boner right there, from the sight of his sexy Bugs Bunny boxer briefs (do they even make these in bigger sizes?!), but then my eyes stopped on the purple blotch in the lower part of his body. Towards the edges it turned into a horrible yellow, and there was a bit of green at places too. I can't imagine how painful it must be for him. My eyes even watered a bit and I blinked rapidly. 

"He got you pretty bad." I said softly.


Anger boiled in me again.

"He hit you for nothing! And he didn't stop with your nose, but had to hit you in the stomach too! Like..who the fuck does that?!" boy, I was furious.

"Liam, calm down. It was nothing, okay? I'm fine."

"It's not nothing! What if he had hit you with more strength? Do you know that you can die from such a blow to the gut?" 

I realized I was shouting, but it dodn't matter. It had finally hit me how serious this is, and there was no avoiding the topic. Niall looked down. I looked away.

"I shouldn't be shouting at you, it wasn't your fault at all, I'm sorry." I said quietly. 

"Thank you for...defending me." he swallowed.

"Of course! What else was I supposed to do, stand by and watch while he makes up for having a tiny dick by beating you up?"

He smiled and the light in the room got just a bit brighter.

"I could have fought him back, you know."

"I know."

"Hey, love birds, keep it down." Harry poked his head in our room. "Daaaym, that looks bad!"

He came over and leaned down to examine the bruise on Niall's belly while my eyes took in his naked body. 

"That's what I was just telling him, this is serious."

Harry moved his gaze between me and Niall, suddenly serious. He leaned forward and somehow managed to pull us both into a half hug. 

A faint shout came from the adjacent room.

"Harry, come on, I wanna turn off the lights and get some sleep already!" Louis sounded frustrated.

"Oh! Better run!" Harry quickly turned his back to our laughter and ran out of the room. I did notice that his `manhood' that he liked showing around all the time started rising when he heard Louis though. Can't hide anything from me, Haz. 

I smiled at him. The little box had warmed in my hands. I placed the cap on the bed next to me and took a little glob of the white substance. 

"Here goes. It won't hurt that much, I promise."

I tenderly apllied the ointment to the purple skin, spreading it in small circles with my index and middle fingers. I looked up to see that Niall had closed his eyes. I took a little more of the balm and gently moved my fingers to the central part of the horrid bruise. My baby cringed and I immediately removed them. He gave me no encouragement to proceed, but I did anyways. As soon as my fingers touched his skin, he shifted and I accidentally pressed on his skin harder. He let out a yelp.

"Stop moving, you idiot, I'm gonna be done in seconds." I was trying to sound confident but in reality I wanted to punch myself for not being more careful. 

I finished with the bigger spot and examined his skin. Hopefully the medicine works. I kind of wished he'd let me treat the bruise from now on though. A good excuse to touch him more affectionately. 

"I wasn't that bad, was I?" I asked getting up. 

"Actually no." he smiled again and pulled his covers up. "Thanks."


I got in my bed and turned off the lamp on the nightstand. I laid on my back with my hands under my head. Niall wasn't asleep either, you could tell by his breathing. 



He should know.

"I like guys." this came out bad. It just hung there heavily. Half right, half wrong. 

I could hear Niall shifting. His face was towards me as if he was regarding me. 

"Okay. That's good to know." he laughed. there was a pause. "So you're"

"Not really. I like girls too. I'm not sure about everything yet."


"How did you figure it out?" it was evident in his voice that this was uncomfortable for him, but he was making an effort. Perhaps there was a dose of curiosity too. 

"Well...there's someone. And..yeah."


At this point cold sweat was covering my forehead and palms. Shit. 

"So I thought I'd tell you." I said hesitantly.

"Am I the first to know?"

"Not really, Zayn was. But only because he...helped me figure it out." how wrong that sounded.

"He helped you figure it out? Really?" Niall laughed.

"Not like that, idiot." I laughed with him. Something like that always lightens up the atmosphere. 

"I'm glad you told me. I feel honored." he said with an audible smile, "And I'm okay with it, if you were ever worried or anything. Just don't stare at my crotch for too long or I might turn gay too." 

Well that was lame, but I laughed anyways. My boy is okay with it. 

Life is good.