Kiss My Ass, Santa

Chapter 1

Kiss My Ass


“God, I love Christmas! Don’t you, Peter?” Kyle said, to his best friend.

“Bah, humbug!” Peter said, tightening his scarf before putting his gloved hands in his jacket pocket. “I hate Christmas. Always have and always will.”

“At twenty-three aren’t you a little young to be so jaded?”

“Maybe, but I have my reasons.”

As they walked by the entrance to their favorite coffee shop, they spotted a Santa Claus ringing his bell next to a woman holding a donation can for people to put money into.

“How can anyone hate, Santa?” Kyle said. “Just look at the jolly guy.” He pointed toward the Santa then put a dollar into the donation can.

The Santa looked toward Peter, but was rewarded with an angry scowl. He smiled, in an effort to get Peter to respond, which he did.

“Kiss my ass, Santa, you old bastard!”

A look of shock appeared on the face of the woman holding the donation can, and a mother walking by with a small child covered their its ears with her hands.


* * * *


When they were sitting at a table drinking a coffee and a hot chocolate, Kyle broached the subject of Santa with Peter.

“What gives, Peter? You’re drinking hot chocolate and in my book a guy who drinks hot chocolate can’t be all bad.”

“So I’m the bad guy here, huh, Kyle. It can’t possibly be Santa that’s the bad guy.”

“You have to admit that Santa is not generally known for being a bad guy.”

“If you say so, but I know better.”

“I might not have invited you to spend Christmas here in the big city with me if I’d know you were gonna be such a Scrooge.”

“Ha, ha. Why did you invite me? We haven’t been neighbors since you moved here a year ago.”

“You can’t spite me because I wanted to get away from that dumpy apartment complex back home, can you? I invited you to come with me, remember.”

“I know, and I don’t spite you for it. What would I have done here?”

“I don’t know what you would’ve done, but I do know who you could’ve done,” Kyle smiled. “C’mon let’s get out of here.”


* * * *


In no time, the two were back at Kyle’s apartment. Peter took off his jacket, knit cap, and scarf when they entered, then excused himself to use the bathroom. After washing his hands, he looked in the mirror. As he straightened his chestnut-brown hair with his hand, he thought about Kyle. Regular exercise had kept his friend trim, and he was as happy and carefree as he’d ever seen him. He was jarred from his thoughts by Kyle talking from the other side of the door.

“What’s taking you so long, Peter? Get out of there, I have an early Christmas present for you.”

When Peter exited the bathroom, he noticed that a warm fire had been started in the fireplace. Then he saw Kyle standing in front of it, naked except for a red ribbon around his hard cock. Peter quickly pulled his sweater and turtleneck over his head, then kicked his shoes off. He sat on the sofa and removed his socks and then pants.

Kyle went to Peter and began sucking on his cock through his underwear. He finally yanked down the underwear and pulled Peter to the floor next to him. They kissed passionately, using lots of tongue. Peter then started kissing and sucking on Kyle’s small but perky nipples. He left them and began sucking on Kyle’s hard and veiny pink cock. It was already leaking pre-cum, and he licked it off before turning his attention to the red ribbon. Using his teeth he untied it and let it drop. His focus turned to the large mushroom head of the cock which his tongue explored.

“This is nice, isn’t it?” Kyle said.

“Nicer than visiting Santa, any day.”

“Okay, now you’re spoiling the mood. Tell me about your beef with Santa.”

“Like I said, Santa can kiss my ass. Do you hear me Santa? Kiss my ass, you old fucker!”

“Shut up or he’ll hear you.”

Suddenly the fire went out and the room got chilly. Peter stood and pulled Kyle up.

“It got cold in here really fast,” Peter said. “Maybe Santa did hear me.”

The room went pitch black.

“Peter, what’s going on? I can’t see my hand in front of my face.”

“I think I hear something in the fireplace,” Peter said.

There was a loud thump like something had fallen down into the fireplace, dust filled the room and there was the sudden flash of light as the fire reignited.

The two men gasped at the sight in front of them.

“Someone mentioned wanting me to kiss their ass,” Santa said.


To be continued


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