Date: Sun, 20 Mar 2005 02:59:01 -0800 (PST) From: gabriel leven Subject: ricky ullman in love-1 Ricky Ullman In Love Chapter 1 By DeGobln DISCLAIMER: Guess what! This story has absolutely nothing to do with reality. This is a completely fictional story. The words that make the story that follows is not intended to imply anything about Ricky Ullman's or Max Thieriot's true sexuality in any way shape or form. I do not personally know either celebrity or know of any details of their personal lives. This story is completely fictional and meant for fantasy. Oh yes and if it is illegal to read such material as a factor of age, law, or ordinance....discontinue reading. ALSO: I know this web site usually deals with sex in graphic details. I know that sex is an important part of a love story...in a bold attempt to not leave it out I will portray each sexual act as an act of love rather than as a bathroom encounter. This is my first time ever doing anything like this so if you have any questions, comments, or honest criticism. please send them to degobln@yahoo.com and list "Ricky Ullman In Love" as the subject so I know it's not spam. Finally the end of March has come, and winter is over. This means spring is coming. Spring is my favorite of the four seasons. Something about the purity that takes hold of me as if it was a force rather then an event. I am just happy to see everything come to life again. Winter can be quite depressing, but this last one was not as bad as the one before it. That was a bad season. A season I think of everyday but mostly wish to forget. It was when I had to make a choice, an ultimatum if you will. In one hand, I had my budding career as a young actor; in the other I had my first love-Adam. I could not have both. That would have been impossible, to be a young actor who just happened to like the boys. Either way I became content with my situation over time. I deeply involved my self with work on the set of "Phil of the Future" As well as with a made for t.v. movie. I desperately sought after finding myself this last winter, but to no avail am more confused then I ever was. As I have said, this season was not as bad as ones before. This season seemed quite hopeful for me as a person and I think I can accept that I must stay closeted for as long as possible. Besides, spring is here and with some new beginnings come others. I just may hope that at the end of this season, I will have a clear head and be more then just content. I am a bit lonely, though, I must admit. I catch myself on the streets and other places, staring at guys. Though I do lust for a male I do not stare at their figure, rather their eyes. I sometimes wonder why it is I do this; search their eyes in hopes of seeing their souls. I think it's because when I do meet someone I know I could be with, something in their eyes will glimmer, but only for me. When entranced into a short gaze, it is usually the unknown that I am looking at. Every once in awhile, when I am in the vicinity of another male celebrity my age, I look to their eyes in search of what I am looking for, but with no luck, I find nothing. Though most celebrities I know have not a clue as to humanity beyond the boundaries of their gala-event fundraisers, it is in a celebrity that I hope to find the one that might be the other half of this incomplete soul. I do not want a celebrity for any personal gain, but as a means of security. The Security of knowing the person I am with is on my same level, and will never have a need to sell their story to the paper. I guess you can call me selfish in my need to find someone who has as much to lose as I do in case of exposure. I really do want to be with someone, but as if my previous words were fantasy, I cannot seek anyone. I am not ready for a relationship nor do I know what role to play if in one. As I am a confused mess on the inside it would not be fair to impose onto someone else, this confusion and personal conflict that is the present. So as a consceince person I am single, and will remain this way until the heavens them selves sing their approval. As I pondered the pros and cons that evening on my way to the movie premiere, I got lost along the way and did not know where we were when the town car approached the red carpet The door was open by an older man, and I was immediately taken by a few bright flashes. I made my way up the walk and stopped to pose for a few shots, and sign a few autographs. I enjoyed this part the most, being in the spot light, though this light was not mine to have. I was at the Movie Premiere for "The Pacifier" which starred Vin Diesel. I am very attracted to Vin Diesel, in fact, he is perfectly my type. He is a real man's man, with a perfect body. When I saw the trailer for this movie I immediately became excited about coming to the premier and meeting him. I would be lying if I did not say that he is the only reason I came in the first place. This is besides that fact that this Movie was made by the same, err, company as the one that owns my show. As I walked through the lobby I again began to day dream of Vin, reminiscing of the first time I saw him on the screen, when my father took me to see "The Fast And The Furious". I remembered how immediately struck me as someone of.... "OOF!" my thoughts were interrupted by running directly into someone. Bumping heads I first felt pain then complete embarrassment. In my homosexual dream of Vin Diesel I lost my conscious awareness and while being ignorant of my surroundings clumsily bumped into someone else. "I am so sorry," A male's voice accentuated with pure sincerity. "Oh no," I began to apologize, "it's me who..." For a moment I completely lost my words. I looked up at him for the first time, and into those beautiful, alluring eyes. I sensed by the redness in his face that he was embarrassed. How cute he was, I had to admire, though very different from what I am usually attracted to. Realizing that I had stopped dead in a sentence to stare into his eyes I quickly gathered myself together. "It's me who should be sorry, I ran into you," I informed not breaking my gaze for a moment. In his eyes I saw a flare, something not of love, but I could definitely tell he is one of my kind. The movie started and I again became enthusiastic about seeing Vin Diesel on screen though he sat 8 rows in front of me. I became so excited that I almost forgot about the encounter I had with the younger boy earlier. I could not put my finger on it, but I have seen him somewhere before. He seems to me a bit familiar, either that or his face is so beautiful that I just convinced myself I wanted to know him from somewhere. The movie played on as I watched it with the rest of the audience. It was a good little bit into the movie when I was again taken by complete surprise. The younger guy I bumped into in the lobby was now on the screen, an important character in the movie. As the film rolled on, I would come to consider him as Seth, though it was obvious to me this was his characters name, I still had as of yet to learn his real name. It was at the end of the movie that I discovered the name of this beauty. Max Thieriot. It rolls off the tongue like as if it were a song. It seemed very fitting to me. At the end of the movie I found myself at the after party, drinking some illegally procured wine and enjoying the small talk with people I barely knew. When Vin Diesel walked into the room I was hit with my third strike of surprise for the night, I did not care whether or not he was their but rather I was there for another reason. Max Thieriot. He was the reason I stayed and drank alone. I waited for him but when he arrived I did not approach him. I instead watched for awhile from a safe distance, plotting my next move. Planning how it was I was going to make a friend of him before the end of the night. "Hello, I'm Ricky," I introduced myself to Max. "I know, I'm Max," He replied with a charming smile. "I know," I repeated acknowledging my knowledge. "That was a good movie, you did a good job," I complemented him in hopes of not having an awkward silence ruin this conversation. "Oh you think so, we had a lot of fun making it," he said to me quite sure of his statement. "I liked Pixel Perfect, you were really good in it, oh and in Searching for David's Heart you gave an excellent performance," He excitedly complimented me. "I did not know you knew so much about me," I replied completely flattered that I was not unknown to him. "Oh I'm a huge fan," he blurted out before blushing from embarrassment again. I wanted so badly to pursue this. I wanted to pursue him. He seemed to be very perfect in every respect, which is taking into account that I had just met him. I wanted to ask of him so many things, but before I gave my hopes up, there is one question I needed to know the answer to before going any further. "How old are you, Max? I asked him very afraid of my assumption being correct. "Sixteen," his answer echoed in my mind as if it were a shot to the heart. I knew then that I could no longer pursue this. A minor was completely out of the question. Though we talked for a long time that night, and have everything in common, I did not get any of his contact details. Though I wanted him, I knew I could not have him. Legalities completely aside, he is still a child, and with that comes a purity that I should not corrupt regardless of my new found feelings. I went to bed that night very late, or that morning very early. I still have yet to decide whether or not it is the calendar or sleep patterns that I should consider it to be a brand new day. Either way I was very tired, but would not get any sleep. Instead I tossed and turned, dreaming of his eyes, his face, his smile, his voice. Dreaming of him, Max Thieriot. Nothing was going to get him out of my mind, nothing that is except for time. I would just give it time and I would forget all about him.