Disclaimer: Roseanne and all of it's characters are all property of Carsey-Werner. I own nothing.

                                              My Friend D.J

                                                Chapter 3

"Dan can you believe that Cristal actually thinks she's better than me! Just because she's never late and is never rude to the customers she thinks she's a better waitress!"

"The nerve!" Dan said sarcastically. After all these years of marriage Dan found it was better to just humor Roseanne in these types of situations rather than try and reason with her.

The Conner family all 5 of them were seated around the dinner table having dinner. Like usual Roseanne was droning on about something someone said about her insulting her and her work. Dan was listing and humoring her having found that was the only way to avoid fights. Darlene was doing multiple things during the meal to annoy Becky who complained but did nothing to stop it. Yep it was a normal meal at the Connor house except for D.J

"D.J you haven't touched your food. I thought fish sticks where you're favorite." Roseanne said

"I'm not hungry!" D.J said just staring down at his plate.

"Is something wrong?"
"I don't want to talk about it!" D.J said

"Common D.J you know you can tell me anything."

"Roseanne the boy said he doesn't want to talk about it."

"Fine Dan ill just leave D.J to suffer a traumatic experience alone then maybe he can grown up to be a serial killer! Is that what you want!"

"I just don't want to pressure the boy into talking about things he's not comfortable with."

"Fine Dan!"

The family ate the rest of the meal in silence accept for Darlene flinging her peas at Becky. After dinner Becky went upstairs to do her homework and Darlene and D.J where in the living room watching the game. Dan and Roseanne where in the kitchen cleaning up the meal.

"Dan I want you to take Darlene outside and play some basketball with here I want to talk to D.J alone."

"Roseanne I thought we discussed this."

"Listen Dan I have the maternal instinct and I can tell when something is bothering my baby. Now you may not care about D.J but I do and I'm going to find out what's wrong!"

"Alright if you think it's that important."

Dan walked into the living room and spoke to Darlene and a few second later she eagerly got up off the couch following Dan outside. Roseanne walked into the living room sitting down on the couch next to D.J who looked indifferent to the basketball game playing on the T.V. Roseanne turned it off and D.J immediately protested.

"Hey I was watching that!"

"Now I know something wrong the last time you watched a sporting event you were in my belly" Roseanne said with a sarcastic overtone.

"Common D.J why don't you want to talk about it? I know something's bothering you."

"It's just its personal."

"Ok I'll tell you what I'll keep it just between us. I won't even tell your father."
"You pinkie swear?" D.J said holding out his pinkie finger.

"I pinkie swear." Roseanne said crossing fingers with him

D.J told Roseanne everything that had transpired in the garage that day.

"Well I have to say that having you best friend whack you... down there with a golf putter wasn't the best idea and neither was sticking his hand down your pants but honey these things happen. Its part of growing up and from the way you described his reaction it sounds like he was more embarrassed than you." D.J still looked worried. "There's something else that's bothering you isn't there."

"It's just ever since it happened I haven't been able to stop picturing Todd naked. Iv never thought about anybody that way until now. I don't know a lot by I know that's not normal. I have this urge to see him naked and I know I shouldn't. Mommy am I queer?"

D.J hadn't been able to get the image of the dirty blonde out of his head. He had even managed to undress him in his mind and put together an estimate of what he might look like.

"Well D.J Sometimes boys are just curious about other boy's bodies. It's a natural part of growing up and only you can determine whether it's more than that. But you don't have to worry about that for a long time. Just enjoy being a kid and when that part of your life comes up you'll deal with it. All I can tell you is that your father and I will love you no matter what. I mean look at Darlene she's a pain in the butt but we still love her."

D.J cracked a smile and said "Thanks mom."

"Come here." And Roseanne hugged him.

"Why don't you invite Todd to sleep over this weekend? Because judging by the way he was raised he's probably twice as scared as you. And if he takes any advice from his mom with that giant stick up her butt you will have to be the one to make the first move"

"Really! Awesome! Thanks mom!" D.J said and hugged her back.

I know you have been waiting and I promise you there will be slash action in the next chapter!

If you like this story and would like to see more chapters I ask to you to please review. Reviews let me know that fans are liking the story which in turn keeps me interested and motivated. The more reviews the less likely that I will loose interest and give up on the story. I also encourage you to include any ideas or plotlines you might have for future chapters. I can always use some fresh ideas.