Supernatural is owned by the CW network. I do not own their characters, only the ones I create. This is a gay story, involving sex between men, if you are underage, you know the rules.
P.S. This is my first crack at Supernatural, I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think..
I have other stories if your interested...Heir of the Amazon, Alexander the Newest of the X-men, The Batman, Titans, The Charmed Sons, and Lucian the Vampire Slayer...Feel free to check them out, and let me know how you like them.
P.S. Let me know what you think, and if you want me to keep going with this story.
Chapter 5- Soul-mates
Previously On Supernatural Boys-
"I'm a virgin, because...well because I have never found someone that I loved completely, to give myself to Master Remy." my voice was barley a whisper. His evil smile crept on his face, showing that he was pleased with my answer.
"Interesting. You and I seek the same thing, soon we will see if you are worthy of my love. Now, I'm going to teach you the meaning of pain. I'm going to teach you that your life is no longer yours, this is now belongs to me. That I can do anything I want with you, anything. I can hurt you in any way I want, for as long as I want and no one is going to save you, but me. I'm going to teach you that every moment you have without pain, is a moment only I can grant you. You are going to learn to do as I say without question, without hesitation, no matter what it is. You are going to learn to beg for anything you get." his voice calm, as if he was having a conversation with an old friend.
"I'm so glad your going to teach me, Master Remy!" I gave a fake smile. Next thing I knew he was putting his baton to the cut on my lip, and held it there. The pain bringing me to tears.
"That is the last flippant thing I ever want to hear from you!" he said taking the baton away from my lip, and punching me in my mouth. He pressed the baton against my stomach, and just as the pain became too much, and I was about to pass out, he pulled away.
"What do you have to say?" he asked.
"Please, Master Remy, forgive me." I managed with the greatest of efforts.
"Very good! Now, the time for talk is over. We will begin your training now." he said, as he began to place the baton on different parts of my body. Filling me with pain, I've never known existed before.
Dean, Sam, where are you?
I'm going to die, and there is nothing anyone can do to help me.
Dean paced the length of the room, while Sam searched through books, looking for the Monster, which had Brody.
"Here, I've found him. He's a Windlow Demon! They are Demons bound to underground caverns, by magic. They spend their lives seeking out mates. They torture you, till they break your spirit, making you their slave. If they find you unworthy, they cut out your heart, and eat it. The only thing that can kill them is for their victims to turn the power against them. They have to give themselves over to the pain, and forgive the Windlow of all they have done, realizing that the only reason they torture them, is because they love them. Only then can they break the bonds that hold them, and kill the Windlow Demon." Sam explained.
"We've got to find Brody, he won't be able to last, and he's not strong enough. He's been hurt too much; he hasn't had time to heal, to be strong. That bastard is going to torture him, and Brody will break, he won't be able to fight back. Sam, we have got to find him!" Dean was trembling as he spoke; his soul ached with a need to rescue Brody. He didn't understand why he felt this need, he didn't care, all he knew was he needed to save Brody.
"Then let's get to City Hall, we can look up the town history, and find out where these caves can be. We'll find him Dean, we have to, and he's counting on us." Sam tried to reassure Dean, and himself. He knew Dean was right, Brody wasn't ready to deal with something like this, and Sam wasn't ready to lose Brody either, not when he didn't know what this connection with Brody was. When Sam kissed Brody, something inside him came alive; he wanted desperately to find out why. He needed to have Brody back, if he was ever to figure out what was happening between them.
"Come on, let's go!" Dean said, walking out the motel door.
Now on Supernatural Boys-
I opened my eyes to find myself in a motel bed. Confused as to how I got there, I turned my head left and right, searching to see if anyone was here. Much to my surprise, there sat Dean and Sam.
"What? How? I'm dreaming, right?" I said shocked.
"Your not dreaming, we found you. You're safe now!" Sam said.
"But how? How did you guys find me?" I asked.
"It wasn't hard. Dean followed his heart, and there you were." Sam said.
"Followed his heart? I don't understand?" confusion washed over me, what was Sam talking about, and why was Dean staring at me like that? Dean suddenly got up, and walked over and sat down next to me. He took my face in his hands, forcing me to stare into his eyes. He held my gaze, staring into my soul, then leaned in ever so slowly, and began to kiss me.
Stunned as I was, I couldn't help but kiss him back. He ran his finger through my hair, and grabbed a hand full of my long hair, pulling me tighter into him. Soft moans escaped my lips, fireworks began exploding all around me. When suddenly I felt another set of hands pull me away from his sweet lips, and turn my head to another set of wanting lips. Sam pulled my tight into a hot passionate kiss, sending shivers up and down my spine.
I was in seventh heaven! I had been scared to make a choice between Dean and Sam, and now I wasn't going to have to. They made the decision for me. They both wanted me, and they both had me.
Dean started ripping my shirt off, while Sam continued to kiss me. Hands were roaming all over my body, and nothing had ever felt better. My cock throbbed inside my jeans, begging to come out to play.
I reached my hands up and began to unbutton Dean's shirt, finally being able to run my hands up and down his muscled chest. With so many hands on my, I was unsure who's hand was on my enlarged cock, but I didn't care, I just never wanted the feeling to end.
"Come on bro, my turn! Sharing is caring!" Dean said, before grabbing my head and turning me toward him, sucking my lips into his warm mouth. He began kissing me with a hunger, I have never felt before. He truly wanted me as bad as I wanted him, and I couldn't be happier. But Dean was sucking the air out of me, I was getting so dizzy, if I wasn't already sitting down, I would have fallen to my knees.
"This is the most amazing thing that could ever be happening to me, in my life. I've been in turmoil over the two of you, and now I'm having you both." I finally was able to speak. I looked from Sam to Dean, there was a hunger in their eyes, I had never seen, and it made my cock throb harder, with excitement.
They stood up and the same time, and ripped all their clothes off, while I watched biting my lips. They stood before me, with their cocks jutting out straight at me. Their low balls sliding from side to side, I licked my lips hungrily. Dean grabbed my head and forced me down on his cock, making me gag as I tried to swallow it down. From behind me Sam grabbed my waist, and pulled me back onto the bed. Dean's cock never leaving my mouth, as I was on my hands and knees on the bed. Sam began to work my hole over with his tongue, as Dean continued to work his cock in and out of my mouth.
I had never sucked a cock before, but I was learning very quickly, for Dean moaned a moan, that began to make me wild for working his dick over.
Sam began working fingers into my hole, while licking and spitting onto it at the same time. The sensation made me moan around Dean's cock, forcing more and more of him down my throat. I began pushing back on Sam's finger, fucking myself on his digits. Moaning the whole time, in pure ecstasy.
"It's time to switch spots, little brother!" Dean said.
"Oh come on Dean, I was working his virgin hole! I want to be first!" Sam whined.
"I'm older, I get his sweet ass first, sorry Bro! Now, move, and don't worry, he sucks cock like a Hover Vacuum!" Dean said hungrily.
Dean pulled his cock out of my mouth, and bent down and began kissing me, before moving behind me. Sam made his way over and began moving his cock, in and out of my mouth. Then pulling out and kissing me, before shoving his cock back in again and again.
"Get ready Baby, the Deanster is about to rock your world!" Dean said, while sliding his cock up and down the crack of my ass.
"Please be gentle, it's my first time!" I moaned, as he slid his cock, teasing my hole.
Sam grabbed my long hair, and began ramming his cock in and out of my mouth, as Dean slid the head of his cock into my ass. I moaned loudly as he slid more and more of himself into me.
"Brody, Brody, Brody, this has got to be the tightest hole I've ever had the pleasure of sliding my cock into." Dean said, while pushing his cock the rest of the way into my tight hole. He held his cock inside me for some time, before he finally began to move in and out, slowly at first, before his rhythm began to speed up. The pain was intense, but then began to turn to pleasure.
The pleasure made me swallow Sam's cock hungrily, causing me to pound my ass back onto Dean's cock. Dean began slapping my ass, with each thrust he pounded into me.
I couldn't believe what was happening, how all my dreams were coming true, with the two men I couldn't decide who I wanted more.
I could not have been happier.
Dean continued to slap my ass, suddenly his slaps became harder and harder on me.
"Take it easy Dean, that's starting to hurt me!" I shouted, letting Sam's cock slide out of my mouth.
Sam grabbed my hair harder than I ever would have thought him to do, as he was always so gentle with me. He began slapping my face, hard. Tears running down my face, I tried to break free, but Dean held onto my waist, while Sam held tightly onto my hair.
"Come on Brody, take it like a man! Don't be a little whinny Bitch!" Dean said angrily.
Dean began pounding his cock violently into my ass, while continuing to smack me.
"Take it you crybaby! Your nothing but a little bitch, all you do is cry. Poor me, poor me, waa, waa, my mommy died, my daddy dad. Waa, waa, I don't know who my real parents are. Waa, waa, I'm scared, there are monters, and their after me. It's time to make you a man, no more being a whinny little bitch!" Dean said, spitting onto my back. He began punching me in the back, as Sam began punching my face.
"I'm ready to shoot bro, how bout you?" Sam said.
"Oh, I'm ready!" Dean said.
Sam began to pound on his cock, till he shot his load all over my face, taking it and wiping into my mouth. Dean pounded his load into my ass, while continuing to beat me senselessly.
I began sobbing uncontrollably, not believing how ugly this had become, after starting off so beautifully. They began laughing at me, mocking me. I felt disgusting, dirty, and scared.
"Did you really think we could want you? Some little brat, who's been nothing but a thorn in our side, since the moment we met you?" Sam asked.
"Really, you little bitch! Do you think someone as hot as me, who can have anyone he wants, would waste his time, on a little crybaby like you? Look at you! Look at me! Come on now, I'm so above you, your less than the shit on my shoes. Get out of my face, before I beat you senseless. Go find someone else to baby sit your pathetic ass! Now!" Dean shouted.
I grabbed my clothes, crying the whole time, I couldn't look up into their faces. As I was bent over picking up my things, Dean kicked me in the ass, sending me flying face first onto the floor. They both began laughing, and spitting on me.
I got up and headed for the door, running out.
As I made my outside, naked. I suddenly felt like I was falling through a hole, as I suddenly realized I was still hanging by shackles to the cave ceiling. Remy stood before me laughing, evilly.
"I told you my pet, no one is coming to save you, not even your two nights in shinning leather jackets! Now, tell me my pet, who is this Dean and Sam? You are constantly screaming for them, each time you pass out from the pain." he asked.
"You bastard! How can you be so cruel? How do you keep getting in my mind? Please, leave me alone, just leave me alone!" I cried.
Anger glinted in his eyes, as he took his baton and brought it to my lips, pushing it against my ear, causing a pain within my head, I was sure was going to cause my head to explode. Blood began dripping from my ear. The blood vessels in my eyes, began to pop. I screamed bloody marry, and sobbed uncontrollably.
"I told you my pet, do not forget the appellation. Next time you do, I'm going to do something that will cause your insides to swell up, and burst. Now answer the question my pet!" his voice was calm, and sweet for a psychopath.
"I'm sorry Master Remy, please forgive me, I was taken off guard." I pleaded.
"You have earned two hours of punishment. Now my pet, who is this Dean and Sam?" he asked.
"They are the two most bravest, caring, selfless men I have ever known. They risk their lives on a daily basis, to save innocent people from all the ugly Monsters in the world. Master Remy." I answered, realizing I was saying more than I wanted to. His control over me was becoming stronger, and stronger. I was afraid soon enough, I would lose myself completely over to him.
"That still doesn't explain who they are my pet, and now I'm afraid I'm going to have to teach you another lesson." his eyes becoming filled with excitement.
"Please Master Remy, forgive me, I'm so sorry. I must not of understood the question. I beg of you, don't punish me please!" I begged, as my eyes began to water.
"I'm sorry my pet, but your not broken yet, and I told you I would break you." his velvety voice, filled me with fear.
He unhooked the chain hanging from the ceiling. I fell to the floor unable to hold my self up. I was beaten, bloody, and weak. He took the baton, and began touching different parts of my body. My chest, my stomach, my throat, causing me to throw up my blood. Then he held it to my ribs, I could feel the pain searing in my ribs, till all of the sudden, I heard a pop, and felt the pain of my rib being broken. I screamed in agony, crying like I've never cried before.
"I knew you were going to be difficult, but your making this harder on yourself then necessary. Stop fighting, it truly is futile my pet." he said, and he leaned down and undid my pants, before removing them, leaving only my underwear.
He took the baton and shoved it hard onto my cock and balls. I screamed the loudest, ear piercing scream, till my voice cracked and no sound left my voice. He continued touching the baton to various parts of my body, where welts began to form, some filling with blood. When he would return the baton to the welts, they burst open, sending blood flying everywhere. The sheer pain was more than I could handle, I was on the brink of passing out, when he stopped. Giving me seconds to catch my breath, before he was ready for more.
"On your feet my pet, now!" he ordered. I struggled to get to my feet, weak, and in more pain than I've ever been in, in my life, I rose to my feet, clutching my ribs.
"Now, answer the question properly. Who are these men, and what do they mean to you. Don't lie to me, or there will be more where that came from, and far worse." he said.
"They are Demon Hunters. They are trying to rid the world of Demons and Monsters, trying to make the world a better place for innocent people. Their parents were killed by Demons. They were sent to protect me, to stop the Demons that would use me to bring upon the apocalypse, Master Remy. Is that the answer you were looking for?" I asked nervously.
"It's a start, and quite more than I expected. You are learning my pet, this pleases me. So it would seem, you are just like I said, more than a mere human. You are truly something special. I knew it the moment I looked into your eyes. Now come here and kneel before me, my pet." he said, pointing to a place on the ground in front of him. I quickly moved and kneeled before him, looking up.
"I didn't tell you to look at me, who gave you permission? I said kneel before me, not look at me!" he said angrily, kneeing me in the face, sending my flying back my nose bleeding profusely.
"I'm sorry Master Remy, please forgive my insolence." I cried.
"You will learn my pet, you will learn. Now, you have been screaming their names since I began your training. So tell me, are you in love?" he asked curiously, walking in circles around me.
"I don't know Master Remy, I don't know. Sam has been nothing but a comfort to me, while Dean is bad boy to no end. I know Dean cares about me, he stares into my eyes, with a look that takes me over, leaving me weak in the knees, confused, bewilder, and so much more. But he also drives me insane, filling me with rage and anger, with his lack of emotion. He wont open himself up to allow anyone in, most of all me. So there is nothing I can do to answer your question Master Remy." I answered, shaking from fear of what he was about to do to me.
"Wrong answer my pet!" he became so angry, shoving the baton at different parts of my body. Before finally beginning to beat me with his fists. I was on the floor, in a weeping ball, as he continued his assault on me. Kicking me in the ribs, and stomach, before finally stepping on my neck and pressing down hard.
"I asked you who are you in love with my boy, now answer the question, and this time you better answer correctly."
Realizing what he wanted, realizing how stupid I truly was at that moment.
"You Master Remy! You and only " I stammered.
"Very good my pet, very good! These guys have not protected you, have they? For here you are at my feet, submitting to my will. Where are they? No where to be found, when will you learn, me and only me is the only one who will save you, protect you, give you pleasure, give you pain. You will only love me, and I believe you will be my mate. I have such high hopes for you. Why you ask? I'll tell you, if Demons are searching for you, they must be of the highest levels. Meaning you are what I have been waiting for my entire life, and that you have been saving yourself for me. I have never felt this way for another in my entire existence, not till you. I have one task left, before I complete your training. I must eat the heart of one more pure human, before I can take you completely for my own." he explained.
"Master Remy, must you take the heart of another?" the thought of him bring another boy, to rip out his heart and eat it. When there would be nothing I could do to stop it, to be forced to sit here and watch while he destroyed a life. I'm helpless, completely helpless and weakened.
"My pet, I must have 12 hearts, before I keep the thirteenth as my mate. Don't be jealous, I'm more than sure I have chosen the perfect mate, by choosing you. Now, I'm going to leave you hanging while I'm gone, you will be in a place of pain, total pain. But I must warn you, if you even for one second think of Bevis or Butthead, while I'm gone, you will be in the most excruciating pain you have ever known. You must only think of me, and pleasant thoughts of me, or you will regret it my pet. Before I go, I have something for you." he said walking up to me and lifting my head toward him. I knew what was coming next, and my knees began to buckle under me, before he brought the baton to my lips and began to French kiss me. My thoughts began to start to think nasty thoughts of him, so I stopped myself and started thinking how beautiful hair he had. It was the only part of him I could remotely find attractive. So I held that thought, and allowed him to kiss me, when he grabbed my head roughly, pulling me tighter into him, leaving me know choice but to kiss him back. Vomit threatening to overwhelm me, I fought with all my might to hold on to the pleasant thoughts, wanting so much to image it was Dean or Sam I was kissing, only I knew he would read my mind, and know it wasn't him I was thinking about. Fearing the pain that would follow, being found out.
I realized in that moment that, Remy's control of me was becoming complete. There would soon be nothing left of me, and I would be only filled with him.
I'm losing myself, Dean, Sam, I'm losing myself...I'm losing the both of you...I'm becoming Remy's. Help me!
Outside Palmer Park-
Dean and Sam climbed down the manhole into the sewer system.
"Dude, this place is rank!" Sam said.
"I hate to do this, but maybe we should split up." Dean reluctantly spoke.
"Dean, I want to cover as much ground as possible, but we're facing a Demon that only Brody can stop. We need to stay together, we're stronger that way!" Sam appealed to Dean's smarter half.
"Your right Sammy, I'm sorry, I'm not thinking straight. I just keep picturing Brody being tortured, or worse, his heart being eaten. I just want to find him, and wring his neck myself!" Dean's fears were getting to him. Sam walked up to Dean and put a hand on his shoulder, comforting him.
"Come on, let's go. He has just got to be down here...somewhere!" Dean said taking the path to the right. The walls of the caves were damp, and dirty. A stench rising as they walked deeper and deeper through the underground tunnels.
Sam and Dean couldn't help but thinking, what would they find? A broken Brody, beaten and bruised. Or a lifeless body, laying limply on the ground, his heart ripped out. They tried to shake off the fearful thoughts, trying to think him alive. Time was of the essence, so they moved as quickly as they could, using their flashlight to light the way.
Minutes turned to hours, hours led to more tunnels, more tunnels lead to no sight of Brody. Tired, dirty, hungry, and failure overwhelmed them, but they pushed on, hoping against hope, that they would find anything that would lead them to Brody.
"Dean, we're getting no where. We haven't slept in forever, maybe we need to take a break. Let's just get something to eat, rest up a little, and start fresh. I've marked the map, for everywhere we've been. There's a manhole up ahead, we can come back and start there?" Sam suggested.
"Maybe your right, I can't see straight. But only a couple of hours, no more that that." Dean agreed.
The left the underground, and headed to the first place they saw for food. They ate quickly, not enjoying the food at all. Sam got up and went to the restroom, making a quick 911 call to Ruben, leaving him a message to meet him outside the motel in a half hour. They headed back to the motel. Dean knocked out as soon as his head hit the pillow, while Sam waited till he was sure Dean was knocked out, before he exited the motel.
Ruben was waiting in his car, as Sam walked up to it, and hopped in the passenger side.
"What is so serious, you had to drag me away from finding a place to keep Brody safe?" Ruben asked curiously.
"Ruben, your not going to like this at all." Sam began to explain everything that happened, much to Ruben's fuming expression.
"The two of you are the best Hunters that ever existed, maybe not the brightest, but the best nonetheless. How could you guys leave him alone, knowing all that is after him?" Ruben asked perturbed.
"Ruben, are you going to ride me, or are you going to help me out to find Brody? Have you ever dealt with a Windalow? Anything?" Sam begged, hoping for anything Ruben could give answers to.
Sam studied Rubens face, and saw just as much fear in his eyes, as there had been in his own, and Dean's. A lump grew in Sam's throat. If Ruben was scared, a demon no less, being scared of this Monster, what chance did the Winchester's have?
"Sam, you know I care about you, more than I should. I've spent all my time helping you at every turn. Saving your ass, guiding you, giving you what you needed. It's taken a long time for you to trust me, and I've spent all my time trying to prove myself to you. But there is a part of you that doesn't trust me, and I've done all I can to earn your trust.
You wont give yourself to me, the way I know we both want it, the way we both need. I know I don't have a right to you, as much as I'd like to. But at some point your going to have to make a choice, your going to have to decide to give yourself to me, or end this. I can only take so much, I want you always, I need you, and I know, whether you want to admit it or not, that you want and need me too.
I'm the first person you think to call, I'm the one you go to, not Dean. You hold yourself back from me, out of fear, because I'm a Demon. But I was human, and I have a human body, with needs and emotions. Sam, I'm in love with you, and I know if you would just let yourself go, give into your desire, give into us. You would love me too.
I wont hurt you, I love you. Yes Sam Winchester, I love you, and I know you love me. Even though you kissed Brody, don't ask how I know. It doesn't change the way I know you feel about me." Ruben poured out all his feelings.
"Ruben, I don't know what to say, but I have to ask, isn't the most important thing we should be talking about right now, about Brody?" Sam asked welcoming any excuse to change the subject.
"Your right, I just needed to say that, while I had the guts to do so. Brody is in a lot trouble right now, and I wouldn't even know how to begin to tell you, how to stop a Windalow. They are a breed all their own, who don't follow the same rules of the Demon world. But, I might be able to do something for you to find out where Brody is being held. But you have to know, by now Brody will surely be under the Windalow's control. You will have no choice but to view him as the enemy.
Before you protest, I'm not telling you to kill Brody. You can't kill Brody, I will have to stop you if you were to try. I'm sworn to protect him, hence the fact that I put him in your lives in the first place.
All I meant was that Brody is under control, to him you will be the enemy. That means you'll have to fight him, without killing him.
I'll have to perform a locater spell, which will lead you to Brody.
But you must be prepared for what you'll find. It could be really bad, one way or the other.
I have to go get the ingredients to cast the spell, I'll text you the location.
But before I go, there is something that I have to do..." he began, as he walked over to Sam grabbed a hand full of hair and pulled him into a mind blowing kiss, leaving Sam weak in the knees, and gasping for air.
Ruben looked longingly into Sam's eyes, before Sam got out of the car, and headed back to the motel room, feeling lost and confused.
Sam snuck into the room, to find that Dean was tossing and turning in his bed.
"No...ugh...Brody...No!" Dean mumbled in his sleep.
Sam walked over to his bed, watching and listening to Dean, wondering if he should wake him up. In the end he decided to leave him sleeping, if you could call it that. Sam laid down on his bed, staring at the ceiling for a long time, thinking about Ruben's kiss, and the kiss Sam gave to Brody.
"What am I going to do? Sam Winchester, what have you gotten yourself into?" he whispered out loud, to himself.
`Things are never easy!' Sam thought to himself, before finally closing his eyes. After pushing away all his fears for Brody, all his uncertainties of his crazy love life, who he wanted more, who he could give himself to. He finally fell asleep.
In the underground caves-
My body ached from being chained up. My arms burned with a searing pain of being strung up by the shackles. Blood continued to free flow down various parts of my body. As cold as it was in the cave, I was grateful to be hung in only my underwear, leaving my wounds free to cool off from the burning sensation of my cuts, and welts.
Could this really be my future? To be tortured and kept by a stark raving lunatic Monster from hell?
As much as I wanted to be in the confusion of love, with Dean and Sam. I found myself slowly forgetting them. Who they were, what they looked like. My mind could only hold on to the vision of Remy, and the power and control he had over me. If my thoughts strayed for even a moment, a magical pain like nothing I could have ever dreamed up, overwhelmed me. I wished for death now, I wished with all that I am, that death would take me.
My mind fought to hold on to any shred of who I really was, but all I could find now, was what Remy had made me become.
I knew there wasn't anything I wouldn't do for him. I know I belonged to him, and with each passing moment was finding that I needed to belong to him.
His intention was to break me, and I believe that he has succeeded. I was now his, and I would always belong to him.
I began to wonder, why have I been fighting? Sure there was pain, but the pain came from his love of wanting me. Wanting me to be his mate, could that be so bad? To belong to someone, that wanted me all for himself. That hurt me, to show me he loved me, was that really wrong?
I couldn't remember if I knew the difference between right and wrong anymore. But I knew now, belonging to Remy was right, it was now what I was living for.
Hadn't that been what I was seeking my whole life, to belong to someone? Why was I trying to fight, what I wanted all along?
Moments later Remy arrived holding a young man, no more than 16 years old. His blond hair hung over his eyes, his slim body, reminded me of the only skater boy in my home town.
Pangs of jealousy ran through my body! How could he bring someone else here? In front of me? Was this another form of torture?
He laid the boy on the ground, and walked over to me. A smirk grew on his face, as he saw my eyes betraying my very thoughts. My jealousy.
He held the baton to my lips, and kissed me hungrily. I didn't understand why I had fought his kissed before, when all I wanted was to be kissing him now.
I pushed myself hard against him, as far as the chain would allow. Kissing him for all I was worth, basking in the taste of his lips.
The pain from the baton was threatening to render me unconscious. But I fought with all my might, to stay awake. To prolong the kiss Remy was pleasing me with. He pulled back, and a grief over powered me. It was unlike anything I had ever felt before.
"Please Master Remy, don't stop. I need to feel your lips pressed against mine. To taste the sweetness of your tongue, to feel the power of your kiss." I begged.
"How pleasing to my ears, my pet. There will be plenty of time for that, later. Right now, I must attend to this boy." he smiled warmly at me.
Rage filled my very soul, a strength the likes of which I never knew I had, overcame me. I pulled hard on the chains, breaking the beam that held me in the air. Remy stared at me in shock, as if this had never been done before. But he stood there patiently waiting, his face returning to a state of calm.
"No! You don't need him, you have me! I need you, I want you, but only for myself! Please I beg of you, I can truly be worthy of your love, I can and will please you like none other can. YOU DON'T NEED HIM, YOU ONLY NEED ME! YOU ONLY WANT ME! TAKE ME! I AM YOURS!" I shouted, moving to stand between him and the boy.
Rage filled Remy's face, his hands began to shake uncontrollably. I realized to late, I forgot the appellation. In my desire for him, I disobeyed him, and I would need to be punished.
He took the baton, and rammed it into my crotch, my balls feeling like a bat had been taken to them. I fell to my knees, panting and screaming. He began to use the baton on my head, on my back, anywhere he could get to. I fell to the floor, coughing up blood, not being able to move. My face lay in the puddle of blood, gasping for air, for I was choking, with no way to beg for help, no way to stop the assault that followed. For he began to beat me, kicking my head, my face, my sides. I could hear the sounds of more ribs being broken, with each kick, and each touch of the baton.
With each breath I attempted to take, the pain became unbearable. Each time I was close to passing out, he touched the baton to the back of my neck, making sure the pain of it, would keep me conscious. If I didn't long for death enough before, I did now.
"I knew you would be nothing but trouble. You bring this upon yourself, my pet. Now I will have to torture you, in a way that I am sure will break your spirit, your soul, your heart. I was hoping I would not have to do this, for I truly have taken to you, chosen you. But you have left me no choice, you will watch as I use this boy, for my sexual pleasure. You will suffer watching, wishing that it was you that I used to enjoy the pleasure of man to man contact. You have brought this upon yourself, when will you learn? I am the master, you are my pet! I make the rules, you must follow. Now stand up!" he growled.
I tried to move, but my legs were too weak. My body hurt in way I never knew, my lungs gasping for air, but nothing came of it, but pain. My ribs ached, as I was sure they were broken on both sides of my body. I was sure a rib, broke through piercing my left lung. I was drowning in my own blood, and there was nothing I could do about it.
My head felt like it was going to explode, my body ached with pains from head to toe. It would seem Remy took pleasure from hearing the sound of my ribs being cracked. I could hardly take breaths without the pain searing through me. I couldn't move, as hard as I fought to move an arm or a leg, nothing happened. All the strength I thought I had, all the powers, were of no use to me. I was his, and there was nothing I would ever be able to do about it.
I only hoped he would end my life, kill me before this went on any further. This collar around my neck, with a chain attached to it, bringing me pain to my body and soul, if I had any unpleasant thought of him, or any thought of escape.
I was his slave, beaten and abused, used and degraded. My cuts pleading, my welts bursting open, nearly naked. Where are the heroes of the world? I faintly remember two men, two men I was growing close to, two men who lived their lives saving others. Where are they now, and why aren't they saving my ass from this Monster? Why can't I remember their names? I can feel it in my bones, they meant something important to me, they were becoming my world. How could I forget them?
"I said get up! On your feet, now my pet!" he ordered.
I wished nothing more than to please him, to do as he commanded, but my body was to far gone. I had nothing left in me, not an ounce of strength left to raise myself.
He kicked me again, causing me to cry out in pain. My voice horse, from screaming out in agony.
"Please Master Remy, I can't move!" my voice barely a whisper.
"Must I do everything?" he said angrily. He walked over to me, lifting me up with on hand. I could barely stand, I had to lean on him for support.
"You will kneel here, and watch me take this boy as my own. Suffering as he gives pleasure to my body, while you watch. Wishing against wishes that it was you who pleased me, and not him." he laughed.
Turmoil engulfed me, as my mind fought with the desire to want to save the boy from Remy, and the jealousy of wanting to be the one that gave pleasure to Master Remy. Why couldn't I just find my true self, fight this power he has over me?
He held the baton to the boy's neck, waking him up.
"What? Where am I? Who are you, what do you want with me?" the boy cried out afraid.
"I am your master, your are my slave. Your are here to please me, before I rip your beating heart out, and eat it. I beg of you, please struggle, it will only make this more exciting for me." Remy laughed.
The fear in the boys eyes, made a lump form in my throat. Remy was going to abuse him, then kill him. I would have to watch!
"Ruben said we must follow the path to the left, and that there would be a cave wall at the end, blocking us from entering. We'll have to draw these symbols, and read an incantation to open the cave door." Sam explained, as they made there way through the tavern.
"He better be right, cause I swear on everything that I will kill him, if Brody is dead!" Dean spat angrily.
"He wants Brody as safe as we do, there is no way he would give us false information." Sam was annoyed that Dean continued to distrust Ruben.
As they entered the passage to the left, they heard a foot step, and a rock falling to the ground.
"Something is up ahead?" Sam whispered.
"Be ready for anything!" Dean whispered back, pulling out Ruben's knife and handing it to Sam. Dean pulled out the colt, and held it firmly in his hand.
Quietly they walked, listening for any sound. Dean couldn't help but hope the Windalow was leaving, giving them an opening to rescue Brody without the trouble of having to fight the Monster.
Sam and Dean cast there eyes left to right, searching in the darkness for any sign of trouble. As they made their way to the dead end they were searching for, they were suddenly jumped by four men.
A fight broke out, Sam using his knife, while Dean used his fists, holding back the urge to waste the bullets in the colt. Suddenly a voice spoke from behind them, bringing the fight to a standstill.
"Dean and Sam Winchester, it's been a long time. Who knew it would be so easy to catch the supposed, greatest Hunters." the voice said cockily.
Dean and Sam quickly got to there fight, standing back to back while circling to survey the men that surrounded them.
"You have us a at a disadvantage, you know who we are, but we have no clue who you are?" Sam said.
"Parker...Parker Rudolph! You knew my father, Peter." Parker answered.
"Old Peter Rudolph! How is the Son of a Bitch? Is he here?" Dean asked, excited that he was surrounded by other Hunters, and not Demons.
"He's dead! But he sends his regards, he wished he could have seen the two of you one more time." Parker's face gave nothing away as he spoke.
"To what do we owe the pleasure of your company?" Sam asked.
"I'm not sure pleasure is the right word here, well maybe pleasure for me, but for you, not so much!" Parker answered, a creepy smile spreading across his face.
Dean and Sam knew in that moment, that these were no friends of theirs. Dean couldn't help but think to himself, nothing is ever easy.
"Why would you say something like that? We're on the same side aren't we?" Sam asked, while Dean remained quite, planning his next moves, to get Sam and himself out of this alive.
"Not anymore we aren't. The two of you have broken your oaths, as Hunters, you are no longer protecting the innocent, but bring upon the end of days. We are here to stop you, and save the world, from the destruction the two of you will cause." Parker answered.
"Just what the hell are you talking about?" Dean finally asked, angrily.
"It goes a little something like this..." Parker began.
I watched horrified as Remy forced his long shaft in and out of Ryan's throat. Tears running down his face, as Remy held the baton to his neck, forcing his cock in and out of Ryan's mouth as hard as he could. Ryan gagged, drool running down the sides of his mouth as he tried to keep up with the face fuck he was receiving.
Anytime I moved and inch, to try and help Ryan the pain of the collar brought me to tears. The magic of the collar controlled me, kept me from helping Ryan, from moving from where I stayed kneeling, and watching.
"Please Master Remy, leave him be, take me, do what you want with me, but leave him be!" I begged.
"Don't be jealous my pet, your time shall come." he laughed.
"Why master Remy, why do you do this? Have you no heart?" I asked.
"I had a heart my pet, I was not always the way you see me now. I was a good boy, a boy my mother was truly proud of. I loved life, and all it had to offer. I loved people, and all there was to learn from the different walks of life. A long time ago, when I was just a young boy, no more than 13 years of age. A man came to my home, where I lived with only my mother. When she answered the door, the fear in her eyes, took my breath away. My mother was the strongest woman I had ever known. To see actual fear in her eyes, sent shivers up and down my spine.
He entered our home, as if it was his own. He stared at me with a look, that still haunts me to this very day.
She quickly grabbed me, and pulled me behind her.
"What do you want? Why are you here?" she asked him. He smiled an evil smile, and looked behind her at me.
"No! No! You promised you would leave us alone, you promised you would never come to him." she shouted.
"I lied, its what we Demons do! He is now of age, the time has come for my son to learn the ways of his father." he said. I was shocked, I was sure I heard him wrong. My mother had always told me my father was dead, yet here he stood in front of us, and he wanted me. I peered my head around her waist, and looked at him.
"Yes my son, I am your father and it is time for me to train you in the ways of our people." he explained.
"No! I wont let you harm him, I wont let you take him! I wont let him become the monster that you are!" she cried, stepping between us.
"He waved his hand, sending her flying against the wall, where she screamed struggling to get free. I stood there frozen, fear of what he was going to do to my mother, fear of what he had in store for me.
He sauntered over, as I stood there motionless, tears running down my face. He put the collar around my neck, the same one you now wear, and I found myself, unable to move, or think, fight or run. I stood there crying, screaming my mothers name. He just laughed, and laughed.
"Now the fun begins, now it's time for your training. Follow me my son!" his voice was cold and harsh. I had no choice but to follow, I was under his control. He waved his hand, and my mother followed floating through the air.
He brought us to this very cave, where he began his training on me. Beating me, teaching me through the pain he inflicted on me, using the baton, as well as his hands. He always felt the physical contact was much more intimate. I believe he got off on it, for he began each training session with his fists.
I have been much to easy on you, as much as you would like to disagree. I told you, I have a soft spot for someone as attractive as you. I have never met anyone as unbelievably sexy as you, nor as strong, who has withstood all that you have. You take all I dish out, and still live, where no other has ever made it past the first few hours. You are something special Brody, the fates are on my side, having guided you to me.
But I'm getting off track here, now where was I." he stopped talking to think about where he was in his story. While he continued to force his cock in and out of Ryan's mouth. Ryan still crying, pleading with his eyes for help from me.
"Ah, yes, I remember now...But I'm also bored with this mouth, it's time for something tighter." Remy smiled, as he roughly grabbed Ryan's hair and raised him off the floor, letting him hang a few feet in the air. I wanted nothing more then to protect Ryan, wishing more than anything I could free myself, but at the same time a part of me was pleased Master Remy was using him for his own pleasure. Which was very confusing, a part of the old me was resurfacing, while the slave in me was only concerned with the pleasure of my Master Remy.
Remy threw Ryan's naked body onto a table, his ass hanging out in the air. Remy spat on his ass, and rubbed the head of his cock up and down Ryan's crack. Ryan whimpered, knowing what was coming next. His virgin hole, afraid of what was going to happen the second Remy slid in his abnormally huge cock. He slowly moved the head of his cock into Ryan's ass, after he broke through, and Ryan yelped with the sheer pain of having his virgin ass broken in. Remy rammed his cock all the way to the base in one hard, quick motion. Ryan cried and screamed, which only made Remy smile darkly. A surge like no other ran through my bones, forcing me to fight harder to move against the control the collar had over me. I could feel that I had moved an inch, but an inch was nothing compared to the ten feet that separated us.
I thought only a distraction may help Ryan now, while I tried to figure a way out of this for the both of us.
"So then what happened Master Remy? What did your father do next?" I asked. Remy stopped his cock pounding, only for a few seconds, to turn and look at me, before he made slower motions on Ryan's ass.
"While my father continued to have my mother watch, as he abused me in everyway possible, things you could never conceive would be done to a child, let alone ones own son. She cried like I had never seen her cry before, her face began to age, for the stress and pain of the situation. Her heart couldn't take anymore of what her eyes were watching. Her heart could no longer handle what was happening to her own son, she let out a final scream. Shouting my name for the very last time, before she collapsed to the floor. She died before my very eyes. Which he only derived pleasure from.
He taught me the pain of the baton, using it from head to toe on my body, bringing me to the point of death, but reviving me before I would truly die, no matter how much I wished for death.
He shoved the baton inside my hole, yes this very baton, and showed me the true face of pain, one that when he looked into my eyes released an orgasm from the depths of his soul. He shook in pleasure, releasing his bodily fluid. Reaching his hand into his pants, and forcing me to eat it. Why don't I show you, it is a sight not many have seen, for many don't live through it." he said, smiling his evil smile.
"No Master Remy, it is not necessary. I believe you, there is no need to witness such an act. I beg of you, don't do that to Ryan!" I begged, tears running down my face, with the helplessness of the situation.
This only made Remy hungrier to show me, his eyes full of lust.
To my utter horror, he took the baton, and shoved it into Ryan's mouth, causing Ryan's eyes to bug out, screams escaped his lips, his body shaking with a fear, that I could feel though I wasn't being touched.
He rammed the baton into Ryan's raped hole. Ryan's back arching with the force of the thrust. Blood began leaking from his anus, while a scream that cracked all glass, shattering them into a thousand pieces echoed through the room. My ears began bleeding from the piercing scream, while Remy's face held that of pure ecstasy. Ryan's body shivered, and shook, his face becoming blue, then purple, he began puking. Remy's body shook, as he moaned in pleasure, his body releasing an orgasm unlike anything I have ever seen. Remy was careful to collect every drop, and fed it to Ryan. Ryan's mouth wide open as he begged for mercy, unable to close his mouth due to his screams, he was force fed every drop of Remy's load.
I cried, like I had never cried before, my very soul ached for the boy, and ached for Remy, for he was once a boy, who endured this same violent torture, which led him to become the evil man that stood before us.
But his violent past, could not excuse his actions now. My heart ached for him, but something within my mind clicked. Remy did what was done to him, for that was all he knew. His actions came from a place of rage, rage that belonged towards his father. For what his father did to him, for the years of violence and torture against him. Remy hated himself, he hated himself for what his father did to him, hated himself for letting those things happen to him.
He hated himself so much, the only way to he knew how to deal with that hate, was to take it out on young innocent boys.
I hated what was done to him, that he was once just an innocent boy himself. An innocent boy who was turned into the monster that stood before me know, raping this boy, using him for his own pleasure, and in any moment about to kill him.
Remy had no choice, his life was forever changed the moment his father taught him who he really was. Remy had to kill the boy, he had to rip his heart out and eat it, if he was to take me as his mate.
I couldn't let that happen.
I had to stop him, even if it killed me.
"And now, for my final act, I'm going to kill you! I'm going to rip your heart out, and I'm going to eat it." Remy said joylessly.
"No! Please I beg of you, just leave me alone. You've already raped me, why must you kill me?" the boy begged.
"Because, it's the only way I can forever be with my mate. Brody and I will be forever, thanks to you. You should feel honored, you should be begging me to eat your heart. Don't you realize just how lucky you are, that you of all the boys out there, have been chosen to give your heart, so that I can be take Brody as my mate for all times." Remy explained.
The boy began begging to be released, while Remy laughed at him.
I knew the pain I was about to face, might be more than I could handle. I knew I was about to have the fight of my life, but I knew I had no choice. I was raised to stand up for people weaker than ourselves, and no amount of pain was going to make me scared to let this monster kill that boy.
I wrapped the chains holding my wrists, and began pulling with all my might. The collar around my neck began to send a pain through my body, unlike anything I have ever felt before. Remy said there was no escape, and to try would be tantamount to death, but I would rather die, than remain the slave of this madman.
A searing fire began spreading through my chest, my head began feeling like it was going to explode. I could feel my veins pounding in my body. My legs began to tremble, my heart pounding, sweat drenched my body. I felt like I was about to pass out, I wasn't sure I could handle anymore of this, but I pushed that thought out of my head.
I had to focus on saving the kid, and myself in the process. I let out a bellowing scream, as I finally pulled the chains out of the wall.
Remy looked at me with shock, while the boy looked at me with hopeful eyes.
I fell to the ground, panting, the pain becoming more with every second that passed. Remy took his baton and held it to the back of my neck, causing an inferno of pain in the back on my neck.
"You truly are unbelievable Brody, I have chosen well. To break free from the chains that hold you, and still live to tell the tale. Truly remarkable, but futile nonetheless. I told you there was no escape, and I meant it. You are bound to me, and you will be my mate for life. I will have to punish you for this, like I've never punished you before. Actually I have never been able to do what I'm about to do to you, to anyone before. No one has made it as far as you have, to be able to take the pain that I dish out.
I'm going to enjoy taking this to the next level, as much as it will pain you, it truly will please me." Remy spoke excitedly.
"I wont let you hurt the boy! You can do whatever you want to me, but I will stop you. I see you for what you really are, your nothing but a scared little boy yourself. You take boy's because they're weaker than you, it makes you feel powerful. But your nothing, you have no real power.
Your father saw to that, the day he began to train you, is the day he took away all your power. You haven't been seeking a mate, you've been seeking the power that he took away." my voice was full of pain, not for myself, but for the boy in front of me, and the boy that Remy once was. Remy began using the baton on different parts of my body, tears began running down my face, but I could not give up, I could not stop.
"I will break you Brody, I will make you rue the day you've spoken to me like this. I will take you within an inch of your life, and bring you back for more. You will know true suffering, suffering like you've never felt before." Remy shouted angrily, as he continued using his baton on me.
I fought with all my might, getting to my knees, I looked Remy in the eyes, as he lowered his baton to use it on me again. I grabbed the baton in my hand, the pain vibrated through my hand, moving throughout my body. I screamed like I'd never screamed before, the pain was like anything I'd ever known.
"That's what it's like to use the baton! Every time I use it, that is what I feel, you think I've hurt you before, this will feel like a cake walk to you when I'm done." his voice was calm, but his eyes were full of anger.
"You can't hurt me anymore, I know how you really are, I know where you live! I feel sorry for you, sorry for everything that you've gone through, everything your father did to you.
I forgive you, I forgive you for what you've done to me, because I truly believe you think your doing this out of love.
You must have told yourself your father loved you, and that's why he did all that he did to you.
I'm sorry he took away the life you could have had, and left you with a life filled with pain and suffering.
I forgive you Remy, but I just can't let you hurt anyone else. You've killed enough boy's in the false name of love. I wont let you do this to anyone ever again." I said rising to my feet, the baton still in my hand, the pain flowing through my body. I was now face to face with Remy, his eyes wide, filled with rage. He raised his hand to strike me, and I raised my free hand to catch his.
"How? How can you possibly stand the pain?" he asked, pulling his hand free. He didn't wait for an answer, he spun around and spin kicked me, knocking me back. I quickly got to my feet, as he came at me with his baton, I raised my hand blocking the baton, and gave him a right hook, that sent him flying back against the wall. I quickly moved to him, and grabbed the baton, holding it to his chest.
"You think you can stop me boy? Do you really think you can stop me with my own weapon? I'm going to hurt you, and I will kill that boy!" he promised.
I knew I had no other choice, I had to kill him, or he would kill that boy and keep me for himself.
"Forgive me!" I said, as took the chain handing from my wrist, and wrapped it around his neck. I choked him with all my might, as he struggled to free himself.
I cried the whole time, as I choked the life right out of him.
I hadn't moved for what seemed like hours, till the boy finally spoke, breaking me out of the trance I was in.
"Th-thank you!" he said.
I turned to look at him and just nodded. I was at a loss for words, I'd done what needed to be done, but was left with a pain in my heart. I knew in my mind that it was only Remy's powers that made me feel this way, but I couldn't shake free of the feeling of sadness I felt for the monster.
I took one last look at Remy, and thought to myself, I hope he could find some peace wherever he was going.
I walked over to the boy, and freed him of his bonds. We walked silently out of the cave, never looking back again.
We weren't walking for very long, when I heard fighting up ahead. I put my hand on the boy's shoulder stopping him from walking any further.
"Stay here!" I said.
"Don't go, please don't leave me here!" he begged.
"Don't worry, I'll keep you safe but that's the only way out of here, and I have to go see what's happening." I tried reassuring him.
I carefully walked towards the fighting, seeing a light up ahead. That's when I heard the voice of an angel shouting.
"Sam, look out!" Dean shouted as someone hit Sam in the back of the head knocking him out.
"Sam!" I shouted, running over to help.
"No Brody, get out of here! Run!" Dean shouted.
But I wasn't going anywhere, not while they were in trouble, not when I just found them again.
"This must be my lucky day, not only do I get the Winchester's, but Brody as well." the man who hit Sam in the back of the head spoke.
I held my hands out, sending him flying into another man, just as Dean hit another guy, sending him flying to a man laying on the ground.
Dean ran over to Sam, and started to lift him up.
"Come on, we've got to get out of here!" Dean ordered.
"Your not going anywhere! Try that again Brody, and Dean dies!" the man said.
"What do you want?" I shouted.
"To kill you, and make the Winchester Boys suffer, like never before." he said.
"Over my dead body!" I said.
"Your wish is my command!" he said, as he raised the gun and fired it at me.
Everything happened in slow motion, I watched as he shot the gun, I saw the bullet leave the barrel, I saw Dean's eyes wide with fright, then suddenly everything stopped, no froze was more like it.
The bullet just hung there in the air, right in front of my eyes. I looked at Dean, but he wasn't moving, nor the man holding the gun.
What the hell was going on?
"Sorry, but I just can't have that!" came the voice of a girl from behind me. I spun around to see a blond haired woman leaning against the cave wall, shaking her head.
"How did you do that?" I asked.
"A little trick I picked up in the hell, no big thing, but it only last a few minutes." he answered.
"Who are you?"
"The name is Lilith, and I'm here to make you a deal." she answered walking towards me.
"A deal? What could I possibly have, that you would want?" I asked confused.
"Only your soul, nothing to valuable. Now, time is ticking, so let's make this quick, shall we." she said.
"My soul? I don't think so lady! Why would I give you that?" I asked.
"To save his life." she answered, pointing to Dean. I raised my hand ready to send her flying back.
"I'm not here to fight you, if I were you'd be dead already. It's a simple trade, your soul for his. You see Dean already made this deal with me, to save Sam's life. Only we didn't know about you before, so now the rules have changed. Dean has six months before we take him to hell, so you can watch him die, or you can go in his place! It's up to you." she said.
That's what the ghost was talk about. Dean's secret is that he's going to die in six months, I couldn't let that happen.
"How do I know your telling the truth?" I asked.
"You don't, but like I said before time is ticking. That bullet can hit you now, killing you dead. While Dean and Sam get shot by Parker, either way, I get Dean's soul, it'll just be sooner, rather than later. So what's it going to be Brody? Dean, or you?" she said looking from Dean to me.
I didn't have time, I didn't know what to do, or did I. Dean was willing to trade his soul for Sam, couldn't I do the same for him?
"If your lying to me, you will regret it!" I said.
"A deal is a deal, your soul for his. By the way, nice work in there, I didn't think you had it in you to kill Remy. I would have stepped in sooner, but I wanted to see how it played out. I can see now, why your so special." she said as she circled around me, she put her hand onto one of my open wounds and took some blood wiping it on a paper that appeared out of thin air.
"The deal's signed in blood, there's no going back now. Six months from now, I'll be back to collect. Tell Dean and Sam I said hello." she said as she turned to walk away.
"Wait, what happens now? What about this Parker guy?" I asked.
"You still have a few seconds, use your head. Knock him out or something, and get the hell out of here. Oh, and don`t stand in front of the bullet." she answered.
I turned around and moved out of the way of the bullet, I held out my hand bringing the gun to me. Then sent Parker flying against the cave wall. Suddenly time was moving again.
"Brody noooo!" Dean shouted, still thinking the bullet was going to hit me.
He stared at me stunned, then turned around to see Parker laying on the ground unconscious.
"How?" Dean began.
"Later, get Sam, we've got to get out of here." I turn around and ran back getting the kid.
I got us back to Dean, and the four of us made our way out.
We took the kid to his house.
"Thank you so much, for what you did back there. If you hadn't killed him, he would have killed me." The boy said.
"I'm sorry I couldn't do before he hurt you. Just take care of yourself, okay!" I said giving him a hug. I turned back around to see Dean and Sam staring at me.
"Brody, what happened?" Sam asked.
"Can we just get out of here, I'd really like a shower, before I go into it all." I answered, looking away from their eyes.
"I'm sorry Brody, I'm sorry we couldn't get to you sooner." Dean said.
"But you did come, and that's what matters most to me." I said.
And that did matter most. They were looking for me, they really did care, the same way I cared about them.
Dean's Soul, for mine.
I must really care.