Vampire Slayers United

Chapter 57: Death by Sex



Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all characters are copyright and

Trademarks of WB, David Greenwalt, Joss Whedon, 20th Century Fox, and

Others. Please do not plagiarize or anything. LOVE YA


As Connor and I made out, he licked at my neck as we lay in the bed. Connor climbed on top of me and I felt so excited. It was Connor, the love of my life, and he was right here in front of me. As he licked my chest all the way down to my pubes, then came back up and he was Micah. Micah slid inside me and I moaned with pleasure as he began pumping furiously inside me. I closed my eyes and opened them to see Graham, who kissed me passionately as he pumped away. Soon, I could feel him tense up and he shot inside of me. I closed my eyes again as he started sucking my dick.

"You like it?"

I opened my eyes to see Lestat and soon a stake protruded from his chest and he turned to dust as Charity, who showed up behind us, smiled.

"Blame yourself." She chuckled.

I sat up in a cold sweat, breathing hard.


"So, wait, you dreamed you were in an orgy?" Kelly asked.

I was standing on my hands, then pulled one of my hands into the air, leaving me standing on one hand, "Well, no, they just turned into each other."

Cale sighed, "Could we not talk about this while we're training?" he asked.

"Sorry, honey." Kelly said.

"Yeah, I'm not into the whole visual either." Doug said, "Not that the visuals are bad or anything, but it's like seeing my brother and..."

"So, she staked him?" Kelly asked.

"Yeah." I said, standing, "Are you guys sure the Master's dead?"

"That's what she said." Doug said, "She made it clear that she was calling the demonic shots."

"And she has his powers?" Cale asked.

"She controlled those vampires." Kelly said.

"By the way, you showed some nice moves." Doug said.

Kelly blushed, "Having a Slayer in your body, she tends to leave tidbits." She explained.

"Tell me about it." I said.

Cale cleared his throat.

"Or tell me another time," I said, turning to Cale, "Teach me oh Watcher-rific-all knowy-one."

Kelly and Doug chuckled.

"I am not being unreasonable." Cale said, "There a certain disciplines that have to be learned, I have been reading the Watcher's Diaries..."

"A bunch of men with Diaries." Doug chuckled.

"Grown men." Kelly added.

Cale ignored him, "...and the most important discipline is knowing where other Slayers have failed."

"I know where they fail, duh, they died." I sighed, "I've been here since seven, it is now twelve."

"Our biggest battle to date is coming, we have to be ready." Cale said.

"We beat a Hell Goddess." Doug added.

"Yes, but this one is more personal, therefore more feelings are intertwined with combat, the more unpredictable the fight." Cale explained.

"Oh it's going to be predictable, I'm going to rip her apart." I said quickly.

"I need to go." Doug said, "Shopping and whatnot."

Cale looked at Kelly, "Shouldn't you be going?" he asked.

"Hey!" she protested.

"You two argue, I'm going to leave." I said, walking out. Doug and Kelly followed.

"Come back." Cale said, watching us all leave.

As I made my way into my house, I saw Mal sitting in the dining room, eating cereal, which was a surprise because usually, he would bring it to the couch and watch t.v. while he ate.

"Hey, you're eating in the dining room." I said, walking in and standing beside the table.

"Hey, you're sweaty and smelly." Mal said.

I sniffed myself, "Thanks." I said quickly.

"Besides, you told me to." Mal said.

"I asked you to." I said.

"Isn't it the same thing?" Mal asked.

I chuckled, "No, smart ass." I said, "I just don't want to clean pasta out of the couch."

"Sorry." Mal said, "But it's your house, you make the rules."

I smiled, "I never looked at it like that." I said.

"That's what's great about you." Mal said.

I chuckled nervously, "That I'm a doormat?" I asked.

"That you're down to Earth." Mal said, "Besides, doormat is such an ugly word...I'd like to think of it as a welcoming mat."

"In any case, this welcoming mat needs to be washed." I said, "Have you seen Lestat?"

Mal frowned, "Nope." He said.

I smiled, "Good to be home." I said, climbing the stairs.


Doug walked through the grocery store, buying, what else, but groceries. He remembered that not long ago, he was walking down these aisles with Gemma, then he put it out of his mind. Dwelling on it wouldn't do any good. He had to keep moving because when he stopped...

"Hello." A beautiful young woman, who could be a dead ringer for Kim Kardashian, had said. She was beautiful and talking to him, Oh God, she was talking to him. What should he say? Should he say anything?

"Uh..." Doug muttered.

"My name is Stacy, and I don't do this a lot, but would you go to dinner with me?" the beautiful woman asked him.

Doug's mouth was dry. He couldn't make words, let alone sentences, "Huh?" he asked.

Stacy chuckled, "Dinner, with me?" she asked.

"Why?" Doug asked, then shook it off, "Of course. Why, of course I would love to go...on a date with you, umm, just one question."

"Yeah?" Stacy asked.

"Why do you want to date me?" Doug asked.

"Well, you're pretty hot and built and, a football player, if I'm not mistaken..." Stacy smiled.

"I used to, but lately, life's been a little...uncontrolled." Doug smiled.

"I understand," Stacy smiled, "So, am I picking you up or are you picking me up?"

"Yeah." Doug said absentmindedly.

"Yeah what?" Stacy asked.

"I'll, I'll pick you up." Doug stammered, "Sorry, it's been a while since a hot girl's asked me out."

"I'm having trouble believing that," Stacy said, reaching in her purse and pulling out a pen. She preceded to write her number in the palm of Doug's hand, "You just get out of a relationship?"

"Was it that obvious?" Doug asked.

"It still is." Stacy said, walking away.


"You disrupted our training session; you can't just disrupt our training sessions." Cale argued as he walked by, nodding to a customer, "Hello." He smiled, then turned back to Kelly, "It is essential for a Slayer and Watcher to bond."

"Oh come on, Xander's a watcher and no way can he connect with every Slayer." Kelly sighed, rolling her eyes.

Cale ignored her comment, "One mistake could mean his death, or the death of someone close to him." He explained.

Kelly was silent for a minute, "Okay, okay, but I can still watch, right?" she asked.

Cale sighed, "No." he said, "This is a simple matter, just Slayer and Watcher."

"Oh come on, I'm your Kelsy cakes." Kelly said, "Ever since I woke up you've been a real pain..."

"Loving pain." Cale said.

"Pain in the ass." Kelly frowned, "I'm not made of porcelain."

"Who is?" Cale asked, "You are made of what every other human is made of, skin and bones."

"So is Austin." Kelly argued.

"Yes, but Austin is equipped to deal with such threats, you are not." Cale said, "Don't you have school?"

"It's college." Kelly said, "Nobody really goes to class."

"I can see you're still valedictorian." Cale smiled, "If you would like to help, perhaps you'd like to look of precedence of anything Slayer-vampire related."

Kelly looked at him quickly, "Can you slim the search a little?" she asked.

"Slim it down to us." Cale said, "Please, try to find anything that could be of any help to us."

"Right, I'm on it." Kelly said, heading to the private collection of the Arcanum.

Cale turned to see Mal and jumped a little.

"Hey." Mal smiled.

"Hello, Malcolm." Cale said, "Is there something I can do for you?"

Mal chuckled, "I feel silly asking you this, but, umm, I see you're looking for employees." He said, handing him the Help Wanted sign.

"You want to work here?" Cale asked.

"I just need some cash," Mal said sheepishly, "Besides, this job would be easy."

"Oh." Cale said.

"Peddling magical items to an overtly magical town...piece of cake." Mal smirked.

"Overtly? Been reading dictionaries, have we?" Cale asked.

"Are you hiring or not?" Mal asked.

"I am." Cale said, "You're hired, you can start by doing inventory and stocking."

"Wait...what? I thought I could peddle stuff." Mal said quickly.

"You start from the bottom up." Cale said.

"Fine." Mal said, heading to the back room, "But I'm good at selling."


Lestat walked up from the basement, calling for anyone in the house, but no one answered. Lestat walked up the stairs, hearing the water going in the shower and walked into the bathroom. He stopped for a moment, realizing that Austin was in the shower, then continued to walk in. Lestat watched as I washed my back, scrubbing long enough to take off some of the skin. Suddenly, I turned and saw him and tried to cover up best I could.

"Lestat!" I shouted, grabbing a towel, "I'm in here."

"I noticed." Lestat said coolly.

I sighed in realization, "You noticed? Is that your way of saying your name is Tom now?" I asked.

"I was just...admiring a beautiful body. Your sensual curves, your muscular back, your supple butt...just muscled enough, but not too muscled." He said seductively.

I smiled, embarrassed, "Look, I..." I said.

"I just wanted to admire it while I can." Lestat said, "I don't like to lose."

"Who said you were going to lose?" I asked.

"Who said it was a game?" Lestat asked.

"You know, you're a lot more abstract than your books describe you." I said.

Lestat noticed the book Lestat on the counter and smirked, "Studying up on me?" he asked.


"Pretty much what I thought, Bi, loves art, people, and himself." I said.


"It's funny you should mention love." Lestat said.


"How does a vampire love?" I asked.


"The same as any man." Lestat said, "How does one not love?"


"You're not the same as any man, heck, you're not even the same as any vampire." I said, "You're more."


"Where is your house guest?" Lestat asked.


"I have no idea, I'm not his mother." I said, "His words, not mine."


"I have studied you, why do you let him talk to you in such a way?" Lestat asked.


I shrugged, walking to my room, "I'm older than I used to be." I said, "Aren't we all?"


"Nope." Lestat smiled.


"Don't you have a band or something?" I asked.


Kill him


"Kill who?" Lestat asked.


"What?" I asked.


Kill HIM!


Lestat clutched his head and I looked at him once again. There was a look of pain upon his face and suddenly, he was different. I walked towards him cautiously and bent down beside him but he vamped out and lashed out at me, grabbing me by the throat and choking me. He looked into my eyes and there was something else there...then, he dropped me and held his head again. I coughed, massaging my throat, and walked over, kicking him in the face.



We all sat in my living room, looking at one another. Everyone had a solemn looked upon their face and it was worse when the looks turned to me.

"So," Kelly said, giving her most sympathetic face, "What do we do?"

"I don't know." I said, "I thought it was the First, but the First is on vacation."

"You said he was talking to himself...could that be the Master, or rather Charity?" Cale asked.

"We did the spell." I said.

"Against the Master, not Charity." Doug interjected, "And it would be the surest way of getting to you, through..."he stopped.

Graham noticed the stares, "It's okay." He said, "It's not like he won...did he win?"

"This isn't a game." I said, "It's a parade, cause we know the problem and it's a fixable problem."

"No." Doug said.

"No?" I asked.

"They've got to know we'd try to keep them out of Lestat's mind, so I'm pretty sure they'd do everything to prevent us from doing that."

"Reversed our reversal spell? They sink to new lows all the time." Kelly said, "So, what now?"

"Can you guys do this without me? I kind of have this date." Doug said.

"You've got a date?" Kelly asked.

"Well, yeah." Doug said, "At first I thought it would be too soon, or at least after I picked my tongue off the floor."

"She's hot, huh?" Mal asked.

"The hottest." Doug said, "And I'm getting back on that dating horse."

"So, now you're a cowboy?" Kelly asked.

"Only if I can wear a hat and spurs during..." Doug said.

"During?" Kelly asked.

We all looked at her.

"Oh...during." Kelly said, "Ewww!"

"I've got to go." Doug said, standing, "Anything else I can do?"

I shook my head.

"The second my date is over, I'm in the books." Doug said, patting my back. The doorbell rang and he went to it, "I didn't want to me meet her at my house, she could be crazy."

"Or a demon." Mal said, looking out the window.

"She's not a demon." Doug said angrily, "See ya." He said, leaving.

"Cale isn't there anything I can do?" I asked.

"End his misery." Mal blurted, watching Doug and Stacy walk away, "It's an option."

"It is, but I want to help him." I said.

"What if you can't?" Graham asked, "What if he takes you down with him?"


"No, I'm serious." Graham said, "What if this is what they know, that you won't be able to do what needs to be done? You're falling for it."

"I have to agree, Austin, this isn't Spike or Angel, he's a liability." Cale said.

"Well, I can't do it." I said, standing, "If that makes me weak, then I'm weak, but I know it's not the right thing!" I said, walking to the kitchen. Kelly followed me in, "I know, but..."

"I know I'm not the biggest Go Lestat girl, but you don't have to. We're going to get through this." Kelly said, hugging me.

I panted, "Wow, I miss this." I said.

"What?" Kelly asked.

"The girly touch." I said, "With you gone, there was actual truth."

"I'm offering the truth, it's just coated with lots and lots of sugar." Kelly smirked, "Besides, we're going to find a way, we always do."


"And we're going to kick that bitch's ass?" Kelly guessed.

"That's my girl." I smirked, walking back into the living room to find Cale, "Where'd Mal and Graham go?"

"Mal went to find Doug's date;" Cale said quickly, "Graham said he had some army type stuff to do. Where's Kelly?"

"In the kitchen." I said, "I'm going to the bathroom."


In the basement, Lestat awoke to see Kelly standing on the other side of the room, by the stairs. She looked startled and he realized it. He thought for a minute, holding his head. Something had happened. He'd done something.

"Nice to see you're awake." Kelly said.

Lestat remembered, he'd tried to kill Austin. The voices had come again and they had made him do things, "Is Austin alright?"

"After you tried to kill him?" Kelly asked, "He's alright, trying to figure out whether he should kill you or not."

"Oh." Lestat said, not fazed by her honesty.

"He's on the ropes, everybody else wants you dead." Kelly said.

"And yourself?" Lestat asked.

"Personally, I'm a little for the plan where you die, but Austin, despite all the common sense he was given, feels something for you. He..."

"What are you doing down here? Didn't I try to kill you once before?" Lestat asked.

Kelly looked through him, "It wasn't you." She said.

"No, it wasn't." Lestat said, "I guess that's why I'm chained."

"You're chained because some skank is controlling you from far underground." Kelly said, "You're a threat. As much as I hate to say this, you need to get as far away from Austin as you can."

"What?" Lestat asked.

"As long as you're here, he's in danger. We're all in danger." Kelly said, "You need to leave."


"Do you love him?" Kelly asked.

"Of course." Lestat said.

"Then, please, leave." Kelly said.

Lestat thought about it. It was the soundest plan he'd heard, but how could he leave Austin?

"I guess there are things worse than death." Kelly said, unbuckling his chains, "Bye Lestat."

"You'll tell him I said goodbye." Lestat asked.

Kelly nodded as he climbed the stairs.


As Doug and Stacy made it back to his place, Stacy ripped off his shirt, revealing his cut abs and began to lick them. She unbuckled his pants and began to lick his underwear, which oddly turned him on. As she began to lick his dick, he noticed that her hand had become a claw.

"Umm, Stace..." Doug said nervously.


Stacy raised her head and looked at him, but she had transformed into a demon! She had scales and a scaly snout and razor sharp teeth. She smirked as she raised her claw.


"I could just eat you up." Stacy smirked.


Before she could bring her claw down, there was a gunshot and Mal stood at the doorway, "Told ya she was a demon." He said, shooting her in the head, "Succubus."


"Thanks." Doug said, zipping up and looking at the dead demon on the floor, "Is she dead?"

Mal stood over her and shooting her again in the head and once in the heart.

- - - - - - - - - -


Thank you for reading.