Date: Tue, 15 Aug 2000 08:20:02 -0700 (PDT)
From: Toji Suzahara <tsuzahara@yahoo.com>
Subject: Alone Among Friends, Part XI

Hi there all! I took far too long for the newest
episode of my story to be posted on this archive. Well if I tell you guys
(and girls) that I had to rewrite 50% of this chapter cause I was so
dumb to erase it due to clumsyness then I guess you won't believe me
(though it's the truth). On top of that I had many things going on
here and was constantly busy.. but this does not matter to you,
so I'll just apologize for the long abstinence.
Anyhow let me loose some words on the newest episode: In contrast
to the previous episdoes I experimented a bit and there are more
'scene-changes' following each other. I would like to know how you like
it or if it is too confusing.
Then I think for the first time there is also 3rd person narration
for Kaneda in the story so before you get confused I better tell you.
Of course I would love to hear from you guys what you think about the
newest episode and any other form of critic is welcome (may it be bad
or good, just let me know.. I wonder why other authors never want to hear
-negative- critic on their story? I mean, isn't a negative critic not also
an opinion? And you as the reader have the right to state whatever you
want..)
Some legal disclaimers: You should NOT be reading this story if it
is against your law that young males have relationships, probably sex
with each other. You shouldn't be reading this either if you have moral
concerns or any other religious "backthought" (oh.. germanism!).
Before I let you go on reading: Don't forget, the story doesn't play in
the states, it's located in Europe, Germany to be precise.
And now have much fun reading,

Toji



"Oh Mr. Bond, you have two items which belong to me:
A little red box and my wife in your hotel room."

Elliot Carver, Tomorrow Never Dies.


Alone Among Friends, Part XI


"Come on, what the fuck?!" Daniel shouted as Sven drove his Nebula in a
totally unfair maneuver into Daniel's car that caused him to loose
control and crash right into the wall.
"Don't whine, wimp, drive!" Sven yelled, grinning wickedly and looking
over to Daniel for a split second, trying not to loose leadership.
Daniel steered his car back to the road and stepped on the gas. Sven was
pretty far off now, but Daniel who was concentrating for his revenge was
catching up quite fast. The commentary announced that it was the final
lap as Daniel's car hit Sven's right in the deck, making it slinger
along the road and loosing control.
"Payback time," Daniel said, with a noticeable tone of victory in his
voice. But that didn't impress Sven too much, steering the car back to
the road, driving at full speed, drifting into curves and after some
seconds he was right behind Daniel again.
Sven stepped off the gas, giving Daniel the hope he would win, but just
in the last section he drove his car to the limits and overtook Daniel
in an elegant maneuver that rendered Daniel's blocking efforts useless.
"I won." Sven said, just with a low and powerful voice.
"Listen kid, I won. You lost. Do you get it? You lost. Shall I spell it?
You el oh es teed.. you LOST!"
"Yeah I noticed... enough," Daniel said, looking down at the controller,
wondering why he was always losing when he was playing Ridge Racer.
"No no, not enough. You lost, and you lost pathetically enough. You
never had the chance to win; I just gave you hopes you know, "Sven said,
grinning really mean. Daniel turned his head around and saw how Sven was
grinning and still babbling, trying to tease him until he would explode.
Daniel thought he wouldn't let it go this far. In a swift move, he
turned completely around and threw Sven back onto the bed, and with
another move, he was lying on top of him, tackling him.
"So who lost now?" Daniel said, grinning.
"Oh I lost, please, please.. Don't kill me.. no no.. don't kill me..,"
Sven cried theatralically.
"That's better."
"I won."
Daniel laughed and pressed Sven harder against the bed.
"You still won?"
"Yeah sure," Sven asserted, looking directly into Daniel's eyes.
"But then I will stay on top of you until the end of days," Daniel said,
grinning and finding this little game he was playing with Sven amusing.
Sven on the other hand was amused himself knowing that he had won the
game and Daniel again couldn't take it. Not that Daniel was a bad
looser, but if one teased him long enough with it, he would get a little
pissed off. Sven knew that.
"I don't think so Dan,"
"You don't think so? So what do you wanna do. I've more power than you,"
Daniel said, grinning sheepishly now.
"I will -still- be freed in two seconds," Sven said, extending his grin
as well now.
"Ah yeah?"
"Yeah!"
The door handle of the apartment was pressed down and Kaneda entered the
apartment with his boyfriend.
"Jens?"
"No, it's me Kaneda, Yilmaz.."
No response from him anymore and Kaneda smiled over to Georg who grinned
back evilly. Both of the guys went straight for their room, where they
wanted to make themselves a little comfortable and probably even a bit
more than comfortable.
Just in the moment when Kaneda and Georg entered the room, Sven grabbed
Daniel's head and placed a kiss on Daniel's mouth for a second. The lips
of the boys met, and Daniel, who didn't expect Sven doing such a thing
was stunned in an instant. The chance for hell freezing all over was
higher than Sven kissing him, he thought, but Sven still had. Seizing
this split second of Daniel's mental abstinence, he easily shook him off
himself and stood up.
"Hi Kaneda, Georg, how are ya guys?"
Kaneda, also as speechless as Daniel, looked at Georg.
"Wow," the latter said.
Sven grinned, "See Daniel. Even less than a second .. And I told you I
would take two."
"You caught me completely off guard," Daniel said, recovering from this
experience. He had tasted a bit of Sven's sensual lips and even a bit of
his saliva.. and boy, was this guy hot, he thought. There was more truth
in his sentence than anything else, and only the other two standing
there could understand that.
Daniel turned around seeing Kaneda and Georg having silly grins on their
faces, and after a second or so he understood what their grins meant.
"Kaneda, no, not that, you got it wrong."
Now it was Sven's time to be perplexed.
"What? Are you guys telepaths or what? Communicate with each other
without one of you saying something? Oh wait, Daniel said something."
"Forget it Sven, anyhow, Kaneda and Georg are back and I think we should
leave for the living room. What about it, wanna join me watching some
TV.. Have some cans of beer in the fridge," Daniel said looking to Sven.
Sunny boy looked at his watch, seeing that it was after 4 p.m., and
decided that he would stay a little longer.
"Yeah, why not. But admit it, this kiss caught you really off guard
right?" He had this huge eyes, like a kid who showed his friend a new
trick with his bmx.
Daniel put an arm around Sven, "Yeah, you really got me off guard," and
both of them trotted out to the living room.
Georg looked at Kaneda and Kaneda looked at Georg.
"I think our carechild is starting to have some fun.." Georg said.
"Na, I don't think so. Sven's not gay I think. I am not very sure
though.. I will ask him later what the deal is.."
"Yeah .. you do that.. talking about deals Kaneda, what's the deal with
us?"
"Well the deal with us.. hmm let me think.." Kaneda said, and moved his
hand under Georg's shirt running it up his spine and touching it gently,
"I think, that's the deal.."

Yilmaz was back to his senses and he was still sitting there on his bed,
doing virtually nothing. Leaning against the wall he didn't know what to
do. After some minutes he decided to let it go off. He stood up and went
to the door, turning the key in the whole, so that it was locked. The
mirror which was standing on the shelf on top of the table wasn't very
big, but it was big enough for him to see his chest and his face. Yilmaz
was pretty proud about his abs, he wouldn't admit that, or tell anyone
about it, but inside he was very proud of them.. actually he was
attracted to his abs. He loved his abs the most in his whole body he
thought. What work it was to define the abs, Yilmaz thought, but it was
an effort for which he had worked very happily. He went over to this
mirror and stood there, adoring his body, the thin layer of hair which
covered his arms and the stroke of hair running from his belly button
down into his boxers. He stood there for a minute or so and slowly his
boxers started to tent out as he was lusting over himself. Yilmaz moved
his fingers over his abs and felt the hardness of the muscles underneath
his tanned skin. The gentle touch of his fingers provided his already
hardening cock another thrust and it started to stand upright as it was
pressing against the fabrics of his boxers which were spaced out by now.
He slowly rearranged his dick with his free hand and it poked out of one
of the holes in between the buttons of his boxers. There it stood, the
epicenter of Yilmaz manhood, the only incarnation of true sex drive, the
only dick which could make a woman really happy, as he thought, and the
only body of his part which he loved more than his abs. He reached down
and grabbed his throbbing shaft by his nicely formed fingers and started
to stroke it softly. The head of his dick was already leaking and precum
was moisturizing most of the head, giving Yilmaz even more sensations.
Nothing was really important now. Not even that the guys were just
sitting in the next room. Those two gay guys. Who liked to suck each
others dicks or fuck each other in the ass. Puah! 'How can one do that?'
Yilmaz thought as he continued to stroke his 6 incher. Yilmaz got rid of
these thoughts and moved his hand up to his mouth slowly.. Then in a
slow gesture he started to lick his palm, until it was completely wet.
This ritual continued for more than 2 minutes, with his tongue wetting
his palm over and over again and in which his prick was still standing
stiff and upright just as if he was stroking it. After the wetting
ritual Yilmaz moved his hand slowly down and grabbed his shaft again,
holding it still but grabbing his dick firmly. Then he slowly started to
move his hips forth and back, squeezing his dick in and out of his hand.
Precum was mixed with saliva and the inside of his hands, his palms to
be precise, became slicker and slicker. More precum oozed out of his
dickhead and Yilmaz was close to cumming. He liked to elongate the
process and so he stopped moving his hips and waited for a minute until
the pace of his heart was back to normal. Just then he started again.
Moving slowly, thrusting, throbbing, squeezing his dick in and out of
his hand which was clutching his 6 incher so firmly that it was
squeezing every drip of precum and cum out of it.
It didn't take him any much longer to cum and in the split second before
he blasted it out, he cupped his dick with his wet hand and cummed right
into his palm.

"I am back home, mom!" Mark said as he shut the door.
"Come over prince, got something for you," Mark's mom said and it
sounded as if she was in the kitchen.
Mark trotted over seeing her standing at the window, "Hi Sweetheart,
I've got a surprise for you."
Mark wondered what it could be and as he entered the kitchen, his mom
turned around.
"Actually I thought I should make you a gift. A special gift Mark for
you have really achieved all you wanted to achieve and what you told me
you would achieve this year. I know that a boy -oh I beg you pardon- a
man in your age needs his liberty. And this is what my gift is for you,"
she said smiling all over her face.
Mark didn't have a clue at all what it could be. Of course it wasn't the
permission to leave the house and live in the city, it must be something
else.
"Well Mark, I don't wanna torture you any longer. Just take a look out
of the window."
Mark did what he was told and couldn't believe what he was seeing. A
brand-new 3 series BMW in silver was standing in front of the house.
"Mom, do you.. eh.."
"Yes Mark, I mean the BMW, that's yours."
"But how, I mean.. is it new? Eh.. how could we've afforded that?"
"Well.. we simply could," she said, smiling to Mark who was still
speechless. He composed himself after some minutes and hugged her real
tight.
"Thank you mom, really thankful.. I wanna go out and see it closer,"
"You do that, and here.. your keys." Mark's mom tossed the keys over,
and they flew in an elegant slope right into Mark's palm. She grinned
and he also grinned. "Never underestimate your old lady son."
Mark grinned even broader and rushed out of the house.

Yilmaz firstly didn't know what to do now that he had cummed right into
his palm and the way to the bath was one too risky to take. Blocked he
thought. He went over and saw the T-shirt he had worn some hours ago and
grabbed it, drying off his hand with it and gently cleaning his
circumcised dick.  He made a small ball out of the T-shirt and held it
tight in his fist, pulled his boxer shorts a little right so that his
softening penis slipped back in and went out of his room, directly to
the bathroom. What Yilmaz missed was that there were some remarkable wet
spots on his boxers. No one would have misinterpreted those for anything
else than they were.

"Hey jerks! It's us," Kevin shouted into the apartment as he and Sabina
stepped in.
"Hullo dude," Daniel yelled back from the living room.
"Hi matey," Sven said. No responses from Yilmaz, Kaneda or Georg.
"Sabina, would you mind waiting for me in the living room? I am just
going to change. Before you say anything else - the room is completely
messy and I wanna save you from looking at it."
Sabina smiled, made a no worry gesture, and went down the corridor to
the living room.
Kevin looked at her as she was walking - he really loved the way she
walked, totally sexy and turning on. What Kevin didn't know was that
Sabina was aware of that Kevin was staring and she walked like that on
purpose. As it seems, and as it had been noted by everybody in the
apartment, is that the event you do not want to happen will happen. Some
call it  'Murphy's law' though it wasn't clear to anyone one in the
apartment why Murphy was the one to blame for this, and just in that
moment, it was meant to be proven again:
Yilmaz stepped out of the bathroom, right in front of Sabina who
shrieked at the first sight and then composed herself. She looked up and
down, seeing him wearing only his boxers and having some wet spots on
it.
"Were we having fun with billy boy in there, punk?"
Without Yilmaz being able to say anything (and he wouldn't say anything
at all anyhow), she moved on. Kevin started to laugh so hard and loud
when he saw the spots on Yilmaz boxers that tears were forming in his
eyes.
Yilmaz looked grimly over, then turned away and headed for his room.
"Wow," Kevin whispered as he entered his room, shutting the door behind
him. What he saw there was complete mess. The beds weren't made, and
some food from yesterday was lying on the table. Daniel, who actually
did care to make his bed, had omitted his ritual this day as well.
"Whatever," Kevin thought, going over to the wardrobe taking out some
clothes.

Mark turned the keys in the keyhole of his new BMW and it got unlocked
in an instant. Central locking. Of course. He slowly got in and
instantly had this smell of a new car in his nose which made him breath
in real long. He loved it. He turned the key in the car and the engine
ignited with a soft humming, hardly noticeable. His hands ran over the
seats and the steering, then over the gearstick. What a feeling it was.
His car. His own car! He had to tell his friends about it.

"Hey, switch back to that other channel!"
"Come on, Sven, that was lame, let's watch this."
"Not at all man, I wanna watch that chick with the big tits!"
"What did I hear right now?" Sabina said from the doorframe where she
was leaning, puzzling the two guys who were sitting on the couch in
front of her.
"Uh nothing!" Daniel said, feeling a little helpless and shy.
"..."
"Well whatever, I always had thought you were a little immature," she
said and grinned. It wasn't a mean kind of grinning.
"I am not going to make any secret out of it," Sven said," I love tits!"
"Gross!" Sabina said and twisted her eyes.
"Come on! I am a guy," Sven said and grinned broadly.
"Yeah, I know that, " Sabina said looking out of the window.
Kevin, who had got ready in his room, had heard the last bits of the
conversation on his way to the living room.
"Jerks, stop annoying my girl, go and get a life."
"Hey Kev, how you doin' .. and where are you guys going?" Daniel asked
smiling as he saw Kevin walking by, completely dressed up and styled."
"To the Cartier Latin. But before we go there, I am taking my sweetheart
out for dinner..  a special dinner," he said, and blinked with his eye
over to Sabina who blew over a gentle kiss.
"You ready babe?"
"Sure!"
"Then let's get going.."
As both of them were walking out of the room, towards the main entrance,
Daniel remembered the episode and before he over thought it, his mouth
had already opened.
"Hey Kevin, I saw Jens earlier,"
Kevin turned around, his face noticeably angrier, "and?"
"Uhm.. well he just said 'hello'."
Kevin looked intensely at Daniel and saw that Daniel wasn't telling him
the whole story.
"What did he really say?"
Daniel was feeling uncomfortable and dumb, he again had jumped the gun.
Sven didn't know anything and now Daniel had started to tell Kevin the
story. Moreover if he started to lie to Kevin now about what Jens had
said Sven would get more suspicious that there is something about it.
"Nothing interesting Kevin, I will tell you later."
For the first couple of seconds it seemed as if it was not satisfying
Kevin, but then he turned around and continued his way to the door.
"Will see you later Daniel, bye Sven." and out they were. Daniel turned
back to the front and stared at the TV screen. Sven didn't say anything
in the first seconds but then Daniel felt how Sven put his arm around
Daniel.
"Daniel, what's wrong?" he said and after a longer gap, which seemed
like a calculated decision to emphasize the importance of his question,
"What's the shit with Jens?? What's going on here? Can you tell me?"
"It's really nothing.." Daniel said," I mean Jens' just being an asshole
lately."
"Mm-hmm.. I see.. If you want to tell me details about it.."
"There's nothing about it Sven, just forget it.. by the way, what are we
going to do right now?"
Sven moved over to Daniel's ear and started to whisper. "Why don't we
play," Sven whispered, managing to let it sound faggish, "play with each
other.."
Daniel, being again confused by this, had to make a quick decision. Play
along or stop it. He decided for the latter, cause he knew that Sven was
just playing and there wasn't anything more to it. Or was there? How
could he be certain? God! He didn't know.
"Come on stop it," Daniel said a little unnerved but uncertain at the
same time.
Sven looked at Daniel, "Oh, are we getting nervous or what?" and he
started to laugh real loud.
"Whatever Sven!"

Mark came back home earlier than he thought he would. He thought that
his new car was simply marvelous and out of this world.. still he
wondered where his mom got all this money from.. to buy a brand-new car.
"Mom?!"
There was no reply and it seemed as if the flat was left. He went trough
the corridor down to the living room to find it empty. A magazine was
lying on the couch and a cup which seemed to have had coffee inside some
time ago was on the table in front of him. The door to the balcony was
shut, and Mark knew that his mom had left the flat for work since
somebody must have called her off in an emergency he assumed. No way now
to thank her again for the car, probably embrace her and ask how she had
managed it.
He turned around and walked into his own room, shutting the door behind
himself. It was a small, nice room, with some pieces of furniture which
were leftovers from the furniture he had when he was a kid. Most of that
stuff he had replaced, but some of the more useful things were still
there.
Mark looked around and threw his jacket in a swift move onto the chair.
He still had a smile on his face when he planted himself on the bed
thinking how cool it was to have this new car. Finally he was also
belonging to the more agile community of this world and with having this
thought the smile on his face got brighter. He took the remote from the
little wooden table which was next to his bed and powered on his rack.
Ambient music started to play which always made him relax more easily.
Mark wondered what he should do now that he was sitting there leaning
against the wall of his room, with his legs drawn back to his body. None
of his friends were at home, he had checked them out, not even Christoph
was around when he drove by. Mark thought that was funny cause normally
there would be at least one guy around. How could that be that now there
was no one around at this moment? Murphy's law he thought. Expect the
unexpected. There was nothing more and nothing less to say.

I kissed Georg gently on his neck and stroke his hair as he was lying on
the bed next to me.
"I love it when you do that," he said and with that he earned himself
some more kisses.
"You only love that?" I asked him in a low voice, letting it sound
serious though not being really serious. I really liked to do that.
Georg immediately turned around and looked with his deep blue eyes right
into mine. After a second a smile played on his face as he noticed that
I was just pulling a joke.
"I think we should join the others in the living room.." he said.
"Good idea!" I said and stood up, walking over to the chair, grabbing my
boxers from the armrest.
"Mmh.. what a lovely ass!" Georg said from behind.
I looked over, grinned and put on my boxers. He was looking so damn sexy
there in the bed, with parts of his body being covered by the sheets,
making the rest a revelation to me. I walked over and sat down next to
him. I ran my hand over his toned body and let it rest on his hip.
"I love every part of your body Georg.. but you know which part of your
body I love most?"
Georg thought about it. "My pecs?"
"Nopes, wrong, I love your head.. or rather what's inside," I said and
smiled. My hand continued to roam over his body and it went under the
sheets down to his pubes.
"And of course I love this aswell.. Mmh.. I feel that you're
responding."
"I'd be straight if I didn't respond to that!" he said and we both
laughed whole-heartedly.
"Come on hunk, we better get dressed and get to the others."
"Okay Kaneda," Georg said and stood up with half an erection which I had
to admit was caused by me. Just seeing this made my own manhood react
and I was getting hard myself again.
"I think if we don't get dressed we're going to do it again.."
"What's wrong with that?" he said and softly touched my member trough
the holes of my boxers.
I stood up, drew him closer to myself and gave him a kiss.
"Nothing Georg, but there's Sven outside. He might wonder what we're
doing in here"
I was quite hard again and I could feel that he was too, but we both
looked at each other and decided to get dressed.

He picked up the phone and dialed Gerald's number. He waited nearly half
a minute before hanging up the phone. Not even he was around. Amazing.
Mark looked around and saw some books on his bookshelf he hadn't
finished reading yet. It was a good opportunity to continue reading one
of those books, but then.. he wasn't feeling like it. He rather wanted
to speak, talk, chat, have fun with somebody. And nobody was around.
Roaming around in the park which was nearby wasn't an option for him
either for he constantly got depressed over seeing the couples in the
park. Couples who were happy, had found each other, and now spending
some time with each other. Even if it wasn't for long, they still had
somebody for the moment being he thought. Even those damn ducks in the
pond had some mates. And whom did he have? Nobody.
He felt that he was again about to get depressed about the way life had
played with him. How much he hated this self pity and it increased his
annoyance, his unhappiness with life itself. God, how cruel was this
world he thought? The only gay guy he knew was an emotional jerk.
Probably not only an emotional jerk. A complete jerk, maybe, but still
his friend. (Was he really his friend?). It was weird, he had an openly
gay friend but Mark felt weird by the thought of telling Christoph about
his own sexuality. Actually he wasn't willed of telling anybody that he
was gay. It was nobody's business.. was it? But he knew that unless he
told somebody he wouldn't find anybody feeling like him. Loving men.
God! 'Loving men' Mark thought. How bizarre! Images of gay pride
festivals and queers walking in dresses and drag queens came into his
mind. 'Me? Being one of them? Cannot be!' He thought. 'You are not like
that', Mark's mind kept on pressing. 'I am not .. a fairy. I am just a
guy.'

"Hey guys!"
"It's just me, Georg.. Sven's gone home already and nobody else's
around.. just Yilmaz I think"
"Really? I thought you had something going on with Sven?" Georg said in
a low voice and grinned.
"Uh no.. it's not like that.. He was just trying to annoy me."
"Sounds like a nice way to annoy somebody Dan," Georg said and grinned.
I punched Georg's side with my elbow signaling him to stop.
"Hey kid, so what's up with you? Anything new?"
"Why does everybody call me kid actually?" Daniel said to no one in
particular. I found that quite amusing.
"Cause you're such a cute ... kid!" I said and started to laugh.
"Whatever.." Daniel said sounding not too good to me. I immediately got
worried.
"Hey hey.. what's the prob? Is something bothering you?"
"No Kaneda, nothing," he said, looking down to the carpet and it seemed
as if he was trying to count the different rectangles and other
ornaments on it. By now I knew Daniel quite well and this was one of
those moments where I could say with a near 99% probability that he had
something on his mind.
I sat down next to him on the couch and Georg took seat on the separated
seater which was closer to the TV. He seemed to pay no attention to us
and I knew that Georg was only doing that because of Daniel. Somehow he
knew that Daniel never really opened up that much in front of him.
"Hey... Dan.. what's the matter?" I said in a soft low voice. He didn't
react in the beginning but then he turned around and looked right into
my eyes.
"Kaneda, I don't know what to say.. I am so damn sorry that cause of
me... .... you guys are out now.."
"Come on, that was never an issue for us.. that's in the past.. why
bothering about that.. what's done is done."
"..."
"Daniel.. is that all?" I asked him and I could see in his face that
this wasn't everything. Daniel's brown hair were all messed up and it
looked quite cute with him and for a second I wondered if it was
intentional, probably a new hairstyle, but then ignored that thought.
His head was still hanging low and he was looking back to the same spot
on the carpet.
"Dan.. it's good to talk about it.. you know that you can talk with me
about everything.."
Daniel didn't reply in the first place. Georg was watching TV and it
really seemed that he was not paying attention - or at least was he
giving us this feeling.
"You know Kaneda, it simply sucks."
"What?"
"You know what I mean."
"Well.."
"No, it does suck. It sucks a lot."
"..."
"Why can't everybody just accept us the way we are, why are we assessed
by our sexuality? What's this?"
"..."
"I mean, what is the difference in you now that Jens knows that you are
gay. I mean, before he knew it, you were good friends, and now, ..
actually nothing has changed and he behaves like an asshole."
He had a point there, but I couldn't really explain it to him.. I didn't
know what to say.
"Why doesn't he see what a good and cool guy you are, why does he only
see that part of you?"
"He's an idiot, why don't we just forget him?" Cool answer Kaneda. But
nothing else came into my mind and I felt a little helpless.
Daniel looked at me and continued, "You know this asshole is actually
telling everybody he knows about you guys.. Just today in the cafeteria
when he saw Sven he started it."
"Started what?" I asked.
"Well.. uhm.. his homophobic shit."
"He did?"
"Yeah."
"Good that you told me, I will take care of that." It was apparent that
Georg wasn't listening to us cause else he would have been fuming
already I bet.
"Well Kaneda, .." Daniel said and stood up, "let's go over to the
balcony."
"Sure." We both went out of the living room and passed Georg who just
smiled at me and continued to watch whatever he was watching there. What
a cool guy.
The view was nice and I could see pretty much for a mile or more, if
there weren't all the high buildings in front of ours obstructing the
view. Below on the street there was a couple walking towards one of the
entrances of the university. They weren't walking straight, actually
they were.. oscillating. It looked rather weird and I thought that they
were drunk. But then I realized it immediately. They were walking on the
edges of the tiles of the footpath, something I used to do when I was a
kid and I had to smile when I remembered that. Either missing the tiles
or missing the gaps in the footpath, that was the game. And since the
footpath below was not a very ordinary one with rectangular shapes but
rather a playful one, the couple walked accordingly ..weird. I smiled at
that and turned to Daniel.
"Kaneda..."
"Yes?"
"I am feeling so alone.. I mean.. You know what I mean, don't you?"
"You have us, your friends around yourself, don't you?" I said though
knowing what he meant. It hurt me so much knowing that the only thing he
was wanting was to be loved. And that kind of love I was unable to give
to him.
"Yeah that is true, but what I mean is that I don't have a ..."
"boyfriend?"
"Yeah," he said and looked down again.

The telephone rang and Mark immediately picked it up.
"Hullo?"
"Hey, it's me, Julia!"
"Hey Jul.. how you doin'?"
"Quite fine, I wondered if you would like to come with us, there's this
party tonight, the Cartier Latin in the university's main building."
"What is it about?"
"Eeeediot," Julia teased him, "it's the carnival party.. disguise,
dressing up and stuff.. don't tell me you had forgotten it?"
"No, not at all," Mark said with a sincerity as if he had never
forgotten anything in his whole life up to now, and apparently it was
convincing to Julia.
"So what'll be your disguise tonight?"
"Not going to tell you that, I'll surprise you."
"Oooh! Hope you're wearing less than usual," Julia said and started to
laugh into her receiver.
Mark was quite puzzled but then composed himself.
"You'll see. We'll meet at 10pm at the main entrance to the roman
lecture halls."
"Yeah, and we might find each other the next day then."
"Why that?"
"That place'll be crowded. If you've a good costume then I don't think
I'll find you."
"No worries Jule, -I- will find you."
"Ah-han?"
"Yeps. See you then," Mark said and hung up the phone.
"Oops.. probably I should have let her say something. Well I think she
won't mind," he spoke with himself and grinned.

Georg had heard every single detail of what had been said when Jens'
name came into the discussion. He didn't want to overhear Kaneda's
conversations with Daniel for he knew that Daniel had some problems and
Kaneda was the only one he felt comfortable with. Sometimes Georg had a
weird feeling and he didn't know what it really was. Was it unnerving
him that Daniel was solely talking to Kaneda about his problems? Or was
he having a problem with Kaneda being so caring about Daniel? He didn't
know and actually he didn't want to know 'cause the longer he thought
about this the more confused he became. What he was thinking about right
now was Jens. Jens was spreading the word. And apparently hadn't been
impressed by Georg's threat.
There was no other solution then to wait and then beat the shit out of
Jens Georg thought. That seemed reasonable, applicable and impressive.
He looked over to the right and saw Daniel speaking to Kaneda, looking
pretty much down. Kaneda who was standing on the other side tried to
comfort Daniel - one could see that, but what Georg also saw was that it
was difficult for Kaneda to comfort him.
Georg sighed out and wondered what would happen if he joined them and
probably tried to help too. Or was it a bad idea cause Daniel only felt
comfortable with Kaneda? Why not with him? Actually, he thought, he
never made a real effort to listen to Daniel or to speak to him. He was
always so busy with Kaneda that the rest didn't seem to interest him.
And Daniel was his friend aswell.
"It's time to change my attitude," Georg murmured and stood up, walking
towards the balcony.
"Hey guys.."
"Hey Georg," Kaneda replied and smiled.
"Hey..," Daniel said.
Georg looked over at Daniel and smiled. "Hey man, what's the matter'?"
There was an awkward silence for some seconds and Kaneda didn't know
what to say.
Daniel finally spoke up.
"Georg. It's actually nothing. I am just feeling a little alone."
"Daniel.. Kaneda and I we're here for you man,"
"I know that Georg and I am thankful for you guys.. but I mean it's not
very long ago that I tried to convince myself that I like girls and was
always trying to date some girls. But that's gone now.. I don't feel
like that and I just want to get to know a guy, a nice guy.. guys like
you."
"No worries Daniel, you'll find that somebody pretty soon," Georg said
and grinned heavily, hugging Daniel. Kaneda looked at that scene and
smiled. Actually he didn't understand Georg's sudden interest in
Daniel's condition but it was good that way.
"Hey thanks man.."
"Dan, no thanks, it's pretty certain. There are a lot of good guys out
there. And we're three pairs of eyes, huh? So we'll spot someone soon,"
he said and grinned," but you know what?"
"What?"
"Tonight's the Cartier Latin..!"
"OH!" Kaneda nearly shouted.
"What's that?" Daniel asked.
"A party in the universities lecture buildings."
"On one floor?"
"On every floor!"
"Every floor?!"
"Yeps, pretty big, and some cool DJs and the local Radio Station will be
around aswell. Best thing to do to get you in a good mood and to make
you forget your worries Dan."
"..."
Georg got a bit uneasy for he thought that he was being a bit careless.
But a second later he recomposed and continued.
"Dan, you know what the best part of it is?"
"What?"
"Most people will go with costumes and stuff.. since it's a
carnival-party."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Do you guys have any costumes?"
"Actually not, but I think we should still go and watch the people
there."
"Come on Daniel," Kaneda said," let's go there. It'll be fun!"
"Okay.. Don't have anything to do anyhow. Let's get ready then."
The 3 of them went back into the living room and started to prepare
themselves. Daniel wondered what to wear. Should he try to look cooler
than usual or just go as he always did? Did he have some sort of costume
or could he make one up? Nothing came into his mind and he went to his
mirror: He saw a guy with brown hair and blue eyes standing in front of
himself. With his key chain hanging on one side of his khaki pants and
his fat DCShoes on his feet. He liked what he was seeing. Actually he
was dressed up well enough. He thought that he wasn't going there to
find someone anyhow, just to have some fun.. and that is exactly what it
should be about.
"Okay, I am ready" he said to himself and went out of the room.

Of course Mark didn't know  what to wear. Not a little clue he had. He
hadn't anything in his mind and now that he had showed off so much in
front of Julie he had to do something at least. As what could he go
there? What??
After browsing trough his cupboards for 10 minutes he decided to take a
look at the old stuff of his dad which his mom still kept in Mark's
father's side of the cupboard. There was a gray suit stinging out from
all of the suits and other clothes which were hanging there and the
strange thing about it was, that this color somehow seemed so
artificial. It reminded him of something.. or rather somebody.
"Dr. Evil" he murmured.
It would be a nice gray suit but nobody would think of him being Dr.
Evil. Nobody would even think he was Scott. He was too tall, his build
was better than both of them had. That brought the TV Show "Buffy" into
his mind. Could he go as a character from Buffy? But that was too
childish. Too stupid in his eyes. The only guy from that show he liked
was Angel. But he wasn't looking like Angel, was he?
"Just fuck it!" He thought and grabbed some clothes out of the wardrobe
and considered the process of choosing as being done.

The evening until the big show in the lecture halls was quite uneventful
for everybody. Daniel and his friends had decided to go there at around
11pm which they thought would still be too early and probably not
crowded enough to have fun.. but hell. They were bored to death in the
apartment and hadn't anything to do there.
"So what do you think, how it will be Georg?" Daniel asked.
"I don't have a clue, it's my first 'Cartier Latin'. We'll just see I
suppose, right?"
"Right! Guys, I am feeling already a bit better.. I'm in party-mode.
Let's rock guys!"
Kaneda grinned heavily and shouted back to Daniel, "Rrrright!"
There was quite a queue already in front of the building and the guys
queued up like the rest.
"Hey.. Hey, Georg!" somebody shouted from the entrance. It was Kevin.
"Hey mate!" he shouted back, gave the others sign to wait and went over
to Kevin.
"Hey, Georg, I didn't think you guys would come here. I know the
bouncers. Just come over here and you can skip the queue" he said and
grinned.
Georg waved over Daniel and Kaneda and they got in without much a
problem.
"Too cool Kevin, thanks a lot"
"No problem. It's getting fuller minute by minute and I can feel the
good vibes in here.. and some guys even have some cool costumes."
"Where's Sabina?"
"She's standing over there with her friends."
Kaneda looked at the place Kevin was pointing to and he nearly froze.
The 4 of them looked so damn good and apparently they had dressed up
being somebody. Some pop group but the name didn't want to come into
Kaneda's mind.
"Ehm.. they look good and they seem to be some sort of group.. singers
or something. I know.. ehm.."
Kevin grinned.
"I know who they are," Georg said and grinned.
"Who then?"
"Easy. 702!"
"Nopes."
"Not?"
"Well.. I think you wont find out."
"Eternal?" Daniel butted in.
"Oh PLEASE!" Kevin shouted nearly.
"All Saints?" Kaneda said and grinned.
Kevin twisted his eyes. "Jerks, are you trying to tease me or what?"

As Mark had said, he had no problem in spotting Julie. She had dressed
up as Mrs. Peel from the Avengers. Uma Thurman was nice, but the movie
was total crap.
"Hey Julie," Mark said and Julia turned around immediately. Mark could
see that she was amazed by what she was seeing.
"Mark! Damn! You look HOT!"
He just grinned.
"Who's that supposed to be??"
"A guy called Mark."
She stood there not saying anything.
"Okay, I will tell you: I just imagined how it would be to be cool. I
mean I always wanted to be cool, knowing that I never was cool, so I
just wore what I would wear if I -was- cool."
Julia was completely puzzled and didn't understand Mark's auto sarcasm.
"Just forget it. I dressed up as somebody you don't know." He didn't
have a clue what that was supposed to mean or whom he meant, but that
was what came out of his mouth.
"Let's go in."
"Wait, Christoph's coming aswell."
"Okay."
They waited for 10 minutes chatting with each other and Mark noticing
Julie hitting on him a couple of times what he ignored as if she hadn't
said anything when Christoph finally came.
"Hey... wow..!"
"Hi C.. Let's go in."
"Yeah M.. let's go in."

The party was spread over the 4 levels of the lecture hall. In the
ground floor the guys who organized the party had put the bars and an
ambient but rather loud tune was filling the space. Conversations
couldn't be overheard unless you were standing very close to another
group.
The first floor was "Strictly Dancefloor" - a motto, written on a board
which was hanging right above the stairs. They called it dancefloor but
what it really was could be called eurotrash at it's best and most of
the guys who had no taste as Kevin would call them were sticking on that
floor. A lot of 'funky' and very 'stylish' people were moving to hard,
rhythmic beats which were coming out of speakers invisible to our
friends.
The second floor was Hip Hop, Soul and Black Music. This was exactly
Kevin's taste. The audience was more mature, and looking a lot better,
so it seemed. It wasn't really noticeable but the guys thought that it
was like that. Even the appearance of this floor was different. There
weren't any of those annoying obscure lights like on the Dancefloor
level, but the whole floor was lit indirectly by lights whose light was
reflected from the walls. Of course it was rather dark, but the
atmosphere was definitely better than what the guys had in the floors
below.
The 3rd floor was dominated by Trance and Techno. All the ravers were
there but what the guys saw wasn't really thrilling them. Guys and girls
moving their bodies asynchronous to a beat far too fast to be danced
with it. Flashing lights in every corner of the floor were pulsing
synchronously either to the Bassdrum or Hihats of the currently playing
tracks. At 160 beats per minute or more it was a rather hard for our
friends to stay on that floor. The whole scene looked bizarre and Daniel
thought for a split second that this could be the opening sequence of
the party in "Blade" when the cute Vampire finally opens up the
fountains and all the blood comes out of the showers. Weird thought.
The by far funniest floor was the last, the 4th floor. The idea behind
it was "Bad Taste - from Abba to Zappa" and they were playing German
mock up music, and stuff from the 80ies. All tracks which had been
popular back in their own respective times but which sounded rather
hilarious now. Nearly all the people on this level were wearing
grotesque outfits, false beards, bell bottom pants and either flower
power shirts or those super ugly 70 years combinations of brown and
orange. It was so bad that it started to look cool again.  A real
oddity.
Looking and speaking with each other, the guys decided that the second
floor was the floor to be so they roamed back down and moved along in
the crowd.
Julie was getting obsessed with Mark and she wasn't letting him go
actually. Somehow he had never expected Julia to hit on him. He thought
of her as his best normal girlfriend but .. apparently she felt a little
bolder today. And he didn't want to hurt her since he wasn't feeling the
same way. He needed to get a drink.
"Hey Julia, I am getting us some drinks, will be back in a minute."
"I'll go with ya.."
"No worries, I will do that myself, need to go to the loo aswell.. will
be right back"
"Oh okay."
Mark tried to evade each guy or girl jumping in front of him and finally
made it to the stairs. As he was going down a hand grabbed his right
shoulder.
"Wait for me."
It was Christoph.
"Shall I get you something aswell?" Marked asked.
"No, I just need a break, I'll go down with you."

"Jerks, I need to get down, I wonder where Sabina is."
"Okay," Georg shouted back and Kevin went off directly to the stairs.
Kaneda pulled Georg's sleeve and shouted into his ear.
"Actually we could have asked him to get us some drinks.. that's
'efficient' you know..?"
"Shall I get you something?" Georg shouted back.
"Yeah.. a tequila."
"Tequila?"
"Just kidding.. and you don't need to go all by yourself. I will go with
you."
"Where's Daniel?"
Daniel was standing a meter to Georg's back and Kaneda pointed towards
him.
"Hey kid, wanna go down with us to get something to drink?"
"Sure pops!" Daniel said and grinned.
There was an enormous queue in front of the bar and the 3 friends just
queued themselves up and waited. Just 3 meters apart, separated by
nearly 2 dozens of other bodies Mark and his friends were standing
aswell for a refreshment.
"And? How do you like it by now Dan?"
"It's quite cool and it's really fun. I thought university parties were
crap."
"Well not this one, cause this one is properly organized."
"Yeah, I am seeing that"
Christoph on the other side was browsing the people for familiar faces
and even though it was statistically unlikely to spot Daniel out of the
crowd he still managed that. Christoph froze when he saw him and he just
tugged Mark's shirt.
"Hey, there he is," he shouted into Mark's ear, not looking at him his
eyes fixed on Daniel as if he might disappear.
"Who is there?"
"Daniel.. The guy I told you of, and with whom I fucked it up."
"Where?" Mark asked out of curiosity.
"There!" He pointed towards Daniel.
"Where?!"
"There, the guy with brown hair, standing next to that hunk and to that
.. I think Asian guy there"
Mark followed Christoph's finger and got the group of 3. First he saw
the hunk, Georg. That guy looked good he thought. A rather tall guy with
a good build - so it seemed. Then he saw the Asian guy. Absolutely not
his type. And then he saw Daniel. A skater. That was the first thought
which popped into his mind. And the next was, why the heck should this
guy be gay? The third thought was that this guy looked very cute. The
longer he looked at Daniel the more he -knew- that Daniel couldn't be
gay. Not from the way he dressed, nor from the way he was talking to his
friends. Mark noticed the smile which played on Daniel's face
occasionally while he spoke and it was something which he would
remember. This smile.
Meanwhile Kaneda looked over and saw somebody pointing at him or Daniel.
"Hey guys, look over there. Discretely, somebody's pointing his finger
at us.. Or am I paranoid?"
First Georg and then Daniel looked over without Mark and Christoph
noticing it really.
"Oh my god!" Daniel blurted out.
"What?! Who's that?!" Georg shouted.
"That's a guy who.. I think tried to hit on me."
"He hitted on you??"
"Uh yeah.. well I think so at least.. I don't know.."
"How did you guys get to know each other? I mean, he's not from our
department, I know all the guys from our department," Georg added.
Kaneda looked at Georg with a serious face which was just a fake but
still looking very serious.
"Uh.. not in that way," he grinned and scratched his head.
"He looks quite good Dan,"
"Ugh.. well.. he does but... somehow.. I didn't like him."
Daniel looked over to him again.
"He looked at me!" Christoph shouted out.
"Calm down C, why do you think that he's gay in the first place? He
looks so normal."
"I don't know.. I just have this feeling.. You know.. my 'gaydar'."
If there was something Mark never believed in, it was the gaydar. It had
never worked for him. He was never able to tell if somebody was gay or
not. Probably the reason behind that was that he never really looked for
somebody, but this point he didn't want to admit to himself. Mark took a
look at Daniel again, cause just the thought that this guy might be gay
created a warm feeling inside him.

Daniel who was standing with his two friends some meters apart noticed
the guy next to Christoph. 'Seems to be his friend' he thought but he
didn't pay any much more attention.
"Hey Dan.. is he annoying you or something?" Georg asked.
"No.. not at all. I think he has just a crush on me."
In a world, where such constraints did not exist, and where one could be
the way one really was, Daniel, Kaneda, Georg, Mark and Christoph
wouldn't have had a problem. But here, at this place, this location and
this time they had a problem. Society didn't let them be how they wanted
to be. In this other world they would be living free. Free to do what
they wanted, free to live out their emotions entirely. Free of fear and
free to express themselves.
Daniel looked at Georg and Kaneda and exhaled.
"I know what you guys must be thinking. Why I am not giving him a
chance."
"..."
"I don't know guys.. I ... I just have a feeling that  he's weird. I
don't know.. urgh.. I mean it's .. well..probably I am scared of .. I
don't know.. it just doesn't feel right.." he said and looked down. The
people around him, the laughter and talk, mixed with the ambient music
on this floor ceased to exist for Daniel. It was as if his mind filtered
it all out, suddenly all the thoughts of his loneliness came back. The
desire to be with somebody.
"I think I can understand it.. You should do as you feel Dan.. Don't
pressurize yourself over this," Kaneda said, tearing the fake silence in
Daniel's head.
Kaneda's voice echoed in his mind. Was this an opportunity? Was the guy
over there somebody important? What was it with him? He remembered the
odd way he had introduced himself. They had run into each other before
that. He had said that he would made up for that ridiculous incident.
Then they met in the canteen.. and now here. Was this kismet?
Was this fate? Was there a higher being involved?



***


Hey.. a long one again. Hope you liked it. Please do let me know what you
think, I'm always happy to get mail from my readers, and all who write me
will be written back. :)
ONE THING: I would like to know who your favorite character is..
and who's the one who annoys you most (or whom you simply dislike) let me know!
Will post the result in the beginning of the next episode. :)
And let me know what you think where this all is going. Let me tell you
that there are only 2 or 3 episodes left. ;)

email to: tsuzahara@yahoo.com